When We Meet Again
by Kaliko Rosa
Summary: Five years later, Hitomi is happily engaged to Amano. Life is perfect: no more psychiatrists or doubts. Then suddenly, her violent visions return; is her wedding a mistake? Has Van come to visit her? But overall, will she fall in love all over again?
1. Mystifying Divisions Rewrite

**When We Meet Again**

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Based on "The Vision of Escaflowne"  
A Fanfiction written by Kaliko Rosa

_Dedicated to every loyal reader who has encouraged me to continue and to cherish this story.  
"So we meet again..."_

**07 / 10 / 05**  
Please note that this is a **re-write** of the first version of WWMA. Currently, **Chapter One - Mystifying Divisions** is the only chapter that has been rewritten. This fanfic, which I am truly attached to, has been sadly put on hiatus for a few years. Currently I am striving to do as much work on it as I can, and I still aim to complete it. I have removed the "update" chapter (Chapter 18). Rather than working under too much uninspired pressure to finish this story, I will instead work at a pace I can manage. This will help ensure that any and all updates made are still up to, and better than, the standard that WWMA has set thus far.

Another significant update is that I've **re-uploaded Chapter 5: Session Tapes**. This chapter has been broken for a long time now, I'm very sorry that I only fixed it recently. I hadn't realized most of the chapter was missing! But Chapter 5 is there now. 

**I thank all of WWMA's readers sincerely**. Please check back for updates :)

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**1.) Mystifying Divisions**

Stars of cotton white drifted slowly, almost dancing, from their place in the black sky. They twirled, and fluttered, and sailed downwards, weaving amongst themselves to form an array of unpredictable constellations. Their movements were neither hurried nor weighed down by gravity's pull; instead they were whimsical, teasing to all other things in such limitless freedom. Under the murky ginger streetlights, they shone like scores of miniature suns. Such a spectacular show was in all their finale, the end of their unknown passage, as hundreds of starry flakes laid to rest on the icy windshield. 

_'Such a shame…'_ she thought quietly to herself, her right hand resting on the lever that sent two giant window wipers sailing across the front glass. The snow was thick, troubling the view ahead, but there was still something to be said about its appealing simplicity. To an amateur driver, the natural world is an undying enemy, presenting countless obstacles against something already so difficult. But now, to the unconfident twenty-year-old, the sailing snow seemed quite quaint, friendly even. The only problem lay in the fact that she was trying, almost fruitlessly, to drive through it. 

"Hitomi, are you sure you don't want me to take over now?" the young man beside her asked his question quietly and quickly, with a gentleness that desired not to puncture the dignity she had desperately preserved over the last hour. His gloved hand rested upon her shoulder, the leathery scent reminding Hitomi of Christmas Eve, when he had worn them with delight after opening her small present. It seemed as if he had never removed them since then. She glanced at him momentarily sitting to her left, long enough to notice the concerned expression written on every turned muscle on his striking face. She smiled. 

"I'll be okay. There isn't very much further to go…" 

Hitomi's optimism was beyond what she believed of herself, but her rosy curved lips told him otherwise. She allowed her jade eyes to return to the congestion ahead of them, for she knew she couldn't let herself live with a bailout like that. Amano was the sweetest thing to her, but she wasn't short of forgetting the meeting he had cancelled with his fellow colleagues to be sitting here with her in his car, in the midst of heaving traffic. She also didn't forget how much she had whined and bickered a few days earlier, pleading him to share more of his time during the weekdays… growing ecstatic when he suggested the evening they lived now. She knew Amano's availability was scarce to come by - understandably, why of course. She knew he was a phenomenal individual. She knew he was always busy rising up that ladder of success, one step ahead of everyone else. There was no way to perceive him without an envious admiration! Perhaps that was why... 

Cutting her thoughts short, the luxury sedan slowed hesitantly at the hectic intersection of Mikako and Grange. Stoplights filled the area, glowing meanly in the dark madness of rush hour, signalling an order that was not meant to be disobeyed. She was at the front of her lane approaching a red, the last place she wanted to be in at an intersection like this one. Swallowing with any amateur's natural uneasiness, Hitomi eased the vehicle forwards at the first sight of green. And like any other uneasy beginner, Hitomi made her first mistake. 

A loud screech filled the air. 

_"Hey! Left-turn first, jerk-off!"_

The young brunette slammed on the Lexus' weeping brakes. The thankful instinct overwhelmed her, as a bulky, indigo minivan cut her off, turning left on the opposing lanes. The Lexus screeched in protest, halting to a sputtering stop just beyond the pedestrian crosswalk. Wide-eyed and pale-fisted, Hitomi hadn't even noticed the driver's infuriated outburst. She didn't notice the green left-turn arrow blinking overhead, or the confused stares from nearby pedestrians. It all passed her by invisibly. At that very moment, Hitomi's startled mind was solely focused on breathing in, and breathing out. 

"What an asshole…" apparently well-recovered from the violent jolt, her angry fiancé nearly spat the words. He had his back to her, squinting out the window as if trying to discern a faraway license plate number. "You need to learn how to use that horn, hun. Damn these people!" he cried it out emphatically, gestures and all. It was to the extent that Hitomi could have believed it wasn't _her_ fault to begin with. 

"Hitomi, come on," his expression took a serious tone, wrought with concern. "We can pull over right after the turn if you want and I can--" 

"No, that's okay," she interrupted with a forced attempt to sound casual. "Thanks. But I'll be just fine." That constrained smile reappeared on her face, promising heinous wrinkles from its overuse. Releasing the brake, she allowed the car to slide forward once the damned green light decided to finally show itself. She swallowed a second time. The frigid snowy winds blew noisily, and her heart thundered with it. _Oh yes, I feel just fine_. 

"You sure?" 

"…I guess I am. I'll be okay for now." Nevertheless, Hitomi's shallow smile remained plastered where it was. But in an unexpected exchange, Amano Susumu leaned over and laid a gentle kiss upon her chilled cheek. His lips were remarkably warm despite the seasonal temperature, and tenderly – achingly – soft. With just their subtle grazing on her icy skin, a long sigh of comfort stirred throughout her unseen soul. 

"I'm proud of you Hitomi, you know that?" 

Hitomi Kanzaki's numerous qualms seemed to melt that very instant. _I'm proud of you Hitomi_ - it rang with a sweet melody.The twenty-year-old's expression abandoned its tense front, although the smile remained perfectly in place. Amano... He had that sort of way with her, a power that could revive those schoolgirl butterflies from time to time. She supposed it was that funny thing called love. 

Suddenly, just then, she recalled her unfinished thought. 

_Perhaps that was why she tried so hard_. She loved her Amano Susumu dearly, fondly, but she sometimes found herself bewildered by her fiancé's success, or even simpler yet, by the type of man he was. Charismatic and prodigious, the twenty-two-year-old medical student was considered a gift-wrapped beau to many of Hitomi's female coworkers and friends. They envyed her, the girl who had won the affections of an attractive man, with both chiseled looks and a dangerous gentleman's flair. After all, Amano was sociable, well educated, and the son of a wealthy upbringing. It was undeniably a lucky catch. Yet the thoughts gnawed at her from time to time: does not a good fish require a good fisherman? It was a bad analogy, but it worked. Here was the great Amano's chosen woman, returning from her non-glorious underpaid career as a telemarketer for the Aimsa Reporter, not even able to steer a vehicle down a straight road. Sometimes, she couldn't help but fear that such differences…. 

"You shouldn't worry about these things," Amano's soothing voice penetrated the air around her, catching her thoughts by surprise. He sat next to her, gazing thoughtfully through the passenger window. It took her moments to realize that his words were thankfully referring to her driving, rather than a brief show of telepathy. 

"I'm proud of you for being so determined. It's really paid off..." his voice trailed momentarily, as if undecided about the words to follow. "But I mean… you should look out for yourself too, Hitomi. I know you're not... feeling too well right now…." 

His words echoed with some resonance and, as expected, without a reply. The tension mounted as events were suddenly recalled. 

_Does he really want to talk about this?_

In moments, Hitomi's praising thoughts of the 'great' Amano were whisked away, leaving her to stare blankly at the emptying lanes ahead. 

He's not even looking at me. 

"You just had a very serious dream…" Her fiancé's eyesight traveled from the window to the olive dashboard. The word "Lexus" stood out boldly in silver text, on a small black plaque. "That isn't normal, you know." 

_Dreams... ?_

"Of course I know," she nearly retorted. The tone was unintentional, but still very much there. 

"… Have you considered seeing someone about it?" 

She gripped the wheel tighter within her gloved fists, and took an inaudible breath. Silence took them over, with the exception of the windshield wipers plowing snow across the glass. Hitomi had expected Amano to say something along such lines sooner or later, and even if she could find the sense in his words, it always hurt just a little, every time, to hear them. 

"Maybe," she reluctantly confessed her defeated thougths. "But if it's going to be like everything with Dr. Teroka again, then no. That's… all that's over. I want to keep it that way. Besides, it can't be that bad. It's only happened this one time." She blinked and nodded, as if to reassure herself. 

"I know you hate psychiatrists," Amano lifted his tone a bit, resting his hand solicitously on her shoulder. He knew she was uncomfortable speaking to him about this sort of thing. Nestling the back of his head against the lowered headrest, he turned to the car roof in a prodding thought -- _three years_. "But… only you can wager out the seriousness of this. I don't want you to deny something just because you don't want to do it." 

Hitomi couldn't help but smile a little, nudging his warm fingers with her cheek. 

"That sounds like some kinda Amano-motto, if you ask me." 

He rubbed his littlest finger against her soft skin, "I just want what's best for you. If someone like that man can help you with these dreams of yours, then maybe you can at least consider the option for a little longer." 

Her smile half returned to its horizontal neutrality, "But it _wasn't_ a dream, Amano, I told you. It was worse than that. And you know it." 

"I know it was bad, Hitomi… nightmarish, really." 

"It was bad, but not like that. You know what it was, Amano, I mean, you were there." She stared towards him momentarily with a look of utter desperation. "You know that kind of stuff only happens during a _vision_." 

"Is that so…" Amano kept his head nestled, facing the bland grays of the car-roof, pondering the mysterious events of the night before. He had to admit that it had been a bizarre and alien occurrence, but there had to be a logical explanation. _It's not like she's some kind of paranormal voodooist_. So many years had gone by now, three ordinary, undisturbed, and healthy years. 

"Never mind," feeling defeated, Hitomi returned her concentration to the taillights ahead. The looming office buildings were now replaced with suburban rows of pink-brick townhouses, coated lightly with a fresh layer of white. The roads began to wind hypnotically, tickling the sleepy sensations within her. "We'll just see what happens." 

"I think you should still talk to someone about it…" 

There was silence. Ralph's Grocery Mart passed them on the right-hand side, nearly glowing in the dusk that had settled in the late evening. Piles of unattended carts lay scattered in the emptying parking lot, seeming distant and isolated from each other. 

"Funny, I thought I was already talking to you." 

The response came and left. The Lexus proceeded in an awkward hush, traveling in a constant beeline, making its way closer to its journey's end. The snowfall was lighter here, every flake dazzling like a rare gem. 

"I know, and I don't mind listening—" 

She sighed, plaintively. 

"But you don't understand it. So you don't _want_ to listen." 

His expression tweaked with frustration and fluster. 

"Hitomi, stop. It's not that. You know I care for you." 

Her emerald eyes were telling. 

_But you don't understand it._

The ticking of the turn signal took precedence again as the two voices muted once more. 2564 Mikako Ave., Meadow Garden Apartments – home at last. Hitomi watched the opposing lanes wearily, wondering guiltily if she had been too harsh on him. 

"Then maybe there's someone else you can talk to…" he apparently decided to ignore the fact she had pitted him against a corner. "Would your mother know anything about this kind of stuff?" 

Hitomi made the turn onto the Meadow Gardens driveway, and drove in the direction of the parking garage. The Lexus wound slowly past a circular island by the front of the apartment, beyond the main entrance, and into a cement inlet that drove towards the underground. All the while, her tired mind blared from such naivety, until the aggravated words spat themselves out. 

"I can't believe you would even suggest that!" 

"Tomi," Amano's voice wavered from the second blow. "I'm just trying to help… I… you know I want what's best for you." 

_'What's best for me…'_ she thought jadedly. 

"I'm sorry, hun, I am," she exhaled, "but you know that I'm just not close to Mother in that way… she's so damn particular sometimes. If I tell her anything like this, she'll immediately think everything's going back to the way it was…she'd probably make me see a psychiatrist again. I could almost bet you." 

"But that's crazy," Amano furrowed his eyebrows in disagreement. "It was so long ago! If you feel you don't need to see Dr. Teroka, then all the better." 

A false smirk scrawled across Hitomi's fair skin, "She won't think so if I tell her something like this…" _I wonder whether you even believe what you said, Amano_. 

Silence revisited them, but then again, it didn't seem to leave. The apartment's parking garage was desolate. Pulling into a designated visitor's lot, Hitomi twisted the key and the vehicle's hum died to a fading whisper. If at all possible, the silence grew louder. 

"Hitomi, give me a chance… please." 

She lifted her chin and looked longingly into the deep, chestnut eyes that begged so earnestly for her compliance. Amano's expression was teeming with a serious compassion, lips pressed together in a gentle firmness. He wanted to understand her. And for hours now, Hitomi Kanzaki had timidly toyed with the idea of telling him all that she could remember… but fear and dread had imprisoned these inner desires. She wanted so desperately for him to understand, so desperately so, that the thought of being misunderstood hurt her more than not being understood at all. 

She could barely handle it herself: 

_Dragons, swords, and machines…  
Fires, wars, and fleeing civilians…  
Dashed hopes, vengeance, confusion…_

_All of it!_ She wanted to explode from all of it! Strageness. Last night had been a constant jumble of these things, of so many unrelated and unknown elements that swiveled around her and enraptured her every emotion, and every thought and every feeling. All at once, she had been caught into this believable yet terrifying dimension, lost inside a reality she could not relate to. In this lived dream, the sensations of pain, terror, heat, and agony flooded her from the tips of her toes to the ends of every hair on her head. The blood sickened her, the sounds deafened her, the gigantic monsters horrified her… and Hitomi's heart had pounded feverishly through it all, with a furious passion that was beyond even the most dreadful of nightmares. Hitomi knew it well… it had been a real but not-so-real void in her life… unlike that of a dream. There was no explaining how… neither was there a way to explain why… but three years later, _Hitomi Kanzaki's visions had returned_. 

"Maybe tomorrow… I just want to rest it out tonight." 

Her smile was gentle, and not so much forced as it was tired. 

Amano sunk slightly in his disappointment, but nonetheless, he removed his left glove and touched the cool surface of her skin. Even in mid-March, Hitomi's cheeks were still a warm shade of rosy pink, soft and ever so teasing. 

"Alright then, if you think that's best, then I'll drop you off here. But I am willing to listen, please Hitomi, remember that." 

"I will," she whispered. Hitomi lowered her eyes sadly. _He'll listen to me, but can he understand?_ She didn't want to think about that… Motionless, Hitomi fascinated over the tenderness of his touch, his hand skimming across the pleasant shape of her oval face. Her heart surged for a brief moment… _These differences_. 

Feeling helpless suddenly, feeling drained and worn, vulnerable and needy, the exhausted young woman collapsed into Amano's soothing, snug and soft embrace. She burrowed into the sweet-smell of his suede coat, digging further until her nose brushed against the itchy collar of his turtleneck sweater, tilting upwards until the skin of her forehead tickled against the growing rubble on his chin. There, she clutched onto his chest with her gloved fingers, closing her eyes in a restless content. 

"I love you Hitomi," Amano whispered his tender and warming words, holding her close against his encompassing body. _The poor girl_. Hitomi's form was huddled and small, face hidden in the hollow of his neck. She seemed so greatly ravaged by what had happened, and the secrecy about it left her fiancé with an uncomfortable level of uncertainty. 

"We've got many things to think about, you know," Hitomi glanced upwards in time to see a gentle smile on Amano's handsome face, who then thought a subject-change was long overdue. "Let's focus on the good things, honey. After all, two months from now... I'll be able to call you my wife." 

"Two months," she buried further into his warmth, shutting her eyes pensively. In what took seven years to develop, two months could seal for an eternity. In two months she would be married to the man she held, Amano Susumu, her best of best friends and future husband. In two months, Hitomi could finally bid farewell to the lame routine that had become her life on a daily basis. In just two months, Hitomi would no longer feel so lonely. Perhaps then, he would understand. 

Amano was the first to open his car door, and together the couple exited on each side of the vehicle, doors slamming loudly in the echo of the cold parking garage. He met her halfway around the middle of the Lexus, gazing fondly at her, observing how the orange lights cast a cardinal tint to her short hair, that tickled as far down as the bottom of her earlobes. 

"I can't wait until then," he smiled, and ever so gently brushed back a lock of brown and red from hiding her pretty, jade eyes. 

_Neither can I_, "I love you, Amano." 

Brimming with her covert emotions, Hitomi lost herself within his warmth, within his softness and sweetness, within the tenderness she cherished, once more. They kissed, like lovers kiss: fleeting yet evocative, softly yet deeply, their lips met and their smoky breaths were, for a moment's time, held captive. But it was short, too short, as all kisses are. And so thus, they parted, as the man returned to his Lexus, as the woman waved her saddened goodbye. Though she knew she'd see him soon, and speak with him sooner still, her loneliness was a force to reckon. At a time so trying, and so confounding, Hitomi felt a deeper need to be with such a loved one. Her heart bore a mystifying ache within it, something that had surfaced in the pit of her vision, and alone she questioned this vulnerability. 

Time could be so sweet in its shortness.

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**Important Note**

This chapter is the first chapter re-written for WWMA. Please remember that any chapter _after_ this one will be lesser in quality. The latter chapters (8+) begin to adapt and eventually maintain a writing style that's a little more refined. The first few though are from my 8th grade days (to give you a view on how old this is, I'm in college now! lol), so please have mercy ;) 

Peace. Love. Anime. 

**Kaliko Rosa**


	2. Recollection

**2.) Recollection**

Hitomi flipped through the blank channels desperately.

Well, this was just great; just when X-Files gets to that really cool freaky part does the lightning decide to take out the cable. Stupid lightning.

And it was one episode she hadn't seen before either! Sighing Hitomi gave it up and shut off the television. The first thought that jarred into her mind was to watch one of Amano's DVD's he gave her, but she figured with the storm going at this rate, she probably should keep the appliances off.

A flash lit up the dark room, and the massive clap of thunder rung through her ears, vibrated through the wooden floors tingling her bare feet. Thankfully, the lights were still on, surviving the storm's severity so far.

Hitomi leaned her head upon the cool glass of the window, feeling the large droplets patter against it, trickling down in an unknown pattern. Rainy weather always got the worst of her. Just by watching the water pour, the trees sway, almost made her just plain sadder. It was a depressing sight, as if the entire world were down and crying in a flood of falling tears. The sound of the teardrops rippling in the puddles, calling out a melancholic tune, a melody so sad, it was like violins weeping. She ran her fingers on the ice-cold pane, glancing outwards, longing for someone to be here with her. It was just so lonely.

Although she was far from her job and telephones and computers, far from her night-schooling and tests, far from those formal driving lessons, she could only now feel far from her own life. She sighed again, eyeing the telephone. If only she could dial up Amano, see how he was doing. But she knew better than to use the phone at a time like this, but still… How about Yukari? She was sure Yukari would have a ton more wedding info to update her on. That girl always had the latest on bridesmaid's dresses, florists, church gardens, the whole bit. Or… or what about her dad.

Her dad.

Hitomi hadn't talked to her mother about her father in seemingly years. She's thought about it though, thought about it pretty damn hard. It was as if the painful memories of her childhood refused to vanish. As if it were yesterday, she could easily recall the whole messy divorce her parents had been in, when she was only eight or so. Just her, the only child, to deal with the problems on her own. But she had to say, she was kind of relieved that they did separate; Hitomi could no longer bear with the arguing when her parents were together. Her father eventually moved on to Seattle in America, pursuing some sort of career in computer drafting. She used to write him letters, for maybe a year or two, but he never wrote back, and then, and only then… she understood.

It wasn't hard to see. He wasn't writing back, and he had stopped the monthly calls. Even after they had gotten a computer at last, her mother had "said" she'd given Hitomi's email address to her father, but not one letter ever came. Once Christmas time came into play her mother finally just came out with the truth. Hitomi pretended she didn't know, but it was plain as day. It's not like she never saw her mother crying on those sad nights, thinking Hitomi was still asleep. It's not like Hitomi wasn't going to hear about the tragic news on the television or somewhere else. Plain as day, her father had never made it to Seattle.

A shudder crawled up her spine making Hitomi seem suddenly cold. Hearing little feet behind her she turned to spot Naria, watching Hitomi curiously from the couch, ever so often bathing her ears with the back of her paw. Grinning, Hitomi went over and cuddled the massive cotton ball.

"Naria, Naria, always such a cheerer-upper." She embraced the white fluff in her arms, burying herself into the warm fur. She couldn't imagine life without that cat. Naria had quite a history. After Hitomi's so-called-disappearance in tenth grade, her mother had adopted Naria as one of the "helpers" to get Hitomi back to perfect mental health. At first Hitomi detested the cat, knowing her mother only got it so Hitomi wouldn't act so "crazy" anymore. But it wasn't long before the two began to bond, and the name "Naria" was given. She just seemed to like the name, it was so feline in a way. And besides, it reminded her of something, which she pretty much forgot what that was now.

FLASH.

Hitomi nearly jumped as the blinding light filled the room, and a violent clap that sent Naria running, and almost Hitomi as well! The rumble echoed on loudly for a few good long seconds. Hitomi gripped the arm-chair as if to regain balance. She felt suddenly dizzy, the rumble didn't seem to stop!

FLASH.

Another brilliant beam cut through the black sky, almost instantly triggering a sharp pain in Hitomi's mind. She gripped the chair tighter, feeling horribly disoriented. Her surroundings seemed to waver, her head deafened by the sound of an enormous crash of thunder. She found herself on her knees, trying to make sense of the floor.

What the hell was going on?

Her mind jarred at her, pinching her with pain, she wondered if she was screaming or not for she couldn't hear through all the echoes of the thunder.

Spinning.

Wildly.

The room refused to stand still, the floor seem to give and she felt as if jell-o, sloshing around her own home, not knowing what to do. Her eyes were filled with blinding images of white, blank nothingness every so often replaced by a view of her spinning room.

Trying to stand; only to fall. Sounds echoed off in her ears, not willing to stop. Shadows darkly cast on the walls moving continuously, in ongoing circles. LOUD. Thunder, so loud. She brought her hands to her ears, held them down, but still it deafened her, rang through her limp body. The whole place was shaking. Massive jolts like four earthquakes gripped the floors and walls.

Sound.

Even with all that was happening, that sound stuck out. A horrible piercing sound, like the clashing of metal. LOUD. Deafening.

Screeching, hurting her ears.

Metal colliding, like swords being struck.

She shut her eyes desperately trying to wish it all away, very, very confused. The sounds grew intense, violent. Ringing in her mind.

Metal colliding, swords clashing, dragons crying. Dragons. That didn't make much sense at all. But it was there, a loud cry heard by her own ears, heard as if it came from only a few feet away. The same cries she had heard in that dream. That vision she had just had the night before. Filled with them. Dragons. Swords. Dragons. Swords.

"HITOMI!"

Her eyes flashed open. She was screaming. She could hear her voice so faint in comparison to the echoing bashes of the things surrounding her.

"HITOMI!"

Her name. Being called. What was it? Who was it? She squinted desperately but the room still moved, spinning as it was before; making her feel sick to the stomach. Try Hitomi…. Try harder. She looked ahead, heard her name. Who?

Amano?

What was he doing? Was he trying to help her? Why was his hair blonde? Why was it so long? She studied his blurry image, It was nothing but a blur, looming above her, calling out at her. Who….

He continued calling out her name.

"I'm here! Amano help me!"

He never turned her way, just kept calling. His long yellow hair flew in all directions as he ran through hallways searching for her. He didn't seem to hear her, or at least that's what it looked like.

"Amano!" She yelled again. She got to her feet. Steadied herself. She had to tell him. She had to tell him she was all right. She ran, her head filled with clashing sounds and spinning rooms, but her eyes focused on the worried figure running ahead of her.

He was fast. She was too, but now her legs felt heavier, the floor wobbling, as if to give way in any second. He ran, and ran, till she couldn't even make him out at the end of the gloomy hall. He turned a corner, sword by his side. Sword?

"AMANO WAIT!" Her arm reached out, but the end of the hallway seemed to loom out even farther. Something was edging at her mind. Voices.

She could hear them loudly talking, discussing, coming from a room. A room next to her. The door was slightly ajar; she hadn't even seen it before. Loud voices, talking, whispering from inside. But who…

Hitomi stood still, stopping herself abruptly, the room still as well at last. She peered in. She could see only blurry images of chairs, tables maybe. Voices still too loud to make out what was being said. Slowly growing softer.

"I can't believe it."

Hitomi stood as quiet as she could possibly, an eye entirely locked onto the little space. She tried not to gasp as someone walked directly past her on the other side. She did her best to tune into the conversation. For some reason this interested her at the moment. More than getting home, more than figuring out where she was, even more than catching up to her strange looking fiancé.

"She's really gone now…. It doesn't seem right." A slick, handsome voice drifted into her thoughts, from the room.. She could only see a part of the one speaking. He was the one who had brushed by before. Tall, and thin, almost about 14 or so…

"But then again, I can't see why I'm making such a big deal of this." His voice was uneven, cracking, trailing. She felt her heart soften, it was the sound of a voice in need. A voice of a person that was sad, broken, she could just sense it.

He plopped down on one of the chairs, surprising Hitomi. She stepped back instantly at the sight of his face. A face a little too familiar to be comfortable with. Dark jet-black hair, framing the face of a handsome lad, eyes of pure chestnut-brown gazing aimlessly, as if lost in a broken world.

She studied it, motionless, enlightened in wonder. Her mind dazing with thoughts. Now who could he be? He dressed rugged, and looked of the fighting type. His face suggested that his presence was not to be taken lightly, but she could sense, inside, he was suffering. Suffering from what? She did not know. All she knew was that she had seen those deep eyes of courage and empathy at least once before.

"You truly do miss her don't you?" A voice wavered, from behind the door, sounding familiar to the kid's voice, but Hitomi couldn't see who was speaking now.

"Doesn't everyone miss her?" Hitomi could hear the kid's voice loud and clear now, the walls stabilizing, floors steady. She keened on to the conversation now that everything seemed sturdy.

"Sure… but you, Van. Its different with you." The mysterious voice answered the boy's question.

Van? Hitomi bit her lip. What an intriguing name. It fit the kid quite nicely as a matter of fact. The Van kid was staring blankly back at the person speaking.

"How could it be any different?"

Hitomi could sense he was starting to get a little more nervous and edgy.

"Van, brother, don't be that way. We all know how you felt about the girl."

Girl? What girl? Brother? So that other guy was this kid's brother. Thoughts raced through Hitomi's mind. She had had a good feeling that voice was Van's brother, strange. Either her psychic skills were improving or she had already known it, which didn't seem right.

"I don't know what you're talking about Faulcon," Van eased back on his chair and refused to look at his brother in the eyes. Hitomi knew in a second that this kid knew everything his brother was talking about.

"Oh Lord Van," a high-pitched feminine voice jotted in out of nowhere and before you knew it, another character came into play, hugging onto Van's side.

Hitomi fell over absolutely flabbergasted. What on earth was that? That _thing _that had…. had went up to the kid. She tiredly picked herself up, really shocked to see that the people inside hadn't even heard her fall. Strange. But what was stranger, was that girl. Or what she thought was a girl. It was some sort of girl, standing there, pulling at that kid's sleeve. She was ORANGE! Orange, like in the color! She had actual stripes, yes stripes, all over her face, legs, arms etc. Tufts of what looked like fur at the moment, surrounded her wrists, ankles, and her mane-like face. And the EARS… those giant ears looming like antennas on her forehead! Her orange striped furry forehead! And she didn't even want to start on the tail…

Hitomi's eyes narrowed in confusion as she tried to analyze what she figured was a "cat-girl". That was basically the summary of whatever that thing was.

"Lord Van, admit it!" it continued to whine at the dazing kid. LORD VAN? Hitomi wondered. What was with the "Lord" item? The kid didn't look all that religious.

He glanced down at the fur-ball pestering at his side.

"Just admit it!"

He continued to eye her, and then gave a long sigh.

"Admit what Merle?"

The cat-person gazed up at him with teary yellow eyes, lip curled in a pout.

"Admit it, that you loved her."

Hitomi's heart skipped a beat. Now this was interesting. So far, the story was starting to come together. Girl left, boy misses her, with a slight chance of romance! **Sigh**, it sounded just like her case and Amano. Only of course, with weird dressed people and cross-species.

Hitomi couldn't keep her eyes off the kid. She glued them on him basically. She studied his forlorn expression, and knew it was true. What the cat-girl said was right. He did love that other girl, and now he missed her because she left for some reason or other. He sat there, concealing all these emotions inside. Hitomi couldn't help but feel for the kid. The young guy, already head over heels in the game of love. But for some reason, she believed in him. She believed that maybe this guy was in actual "love" and now… he had actually lost it. How tragic. If only his friends could read him like this and understand just how much heart-break was involved.

Van stood up, gently pushing little Merle aside, and staring directly in front of him (probably at his brother or something-Hitomi figured). He brushed his dark bangs aside for a moment, and glanced out of the room's window; soft breeze rustling the satin drapes. His mind seemed focused and intent, but she could tell his heart was lost with the breeze, and they all wondered if he'd ever get it back.

"I don't see how this will help anything."

He turned his back on the two, hand on the doorknob. Hitomi jumped back suddenly as he stood directly in front of her, still in wonder on why he never spotted her. But now, she saw him. Saw his sad expression, and had to keep from shedding a tear herself. He had his forehead pressed against the wooden doorway, biting his lip to control his eyes from watering. But even the mighty lil' kid had emotions that could soar and that could drop, far below the depths of depression. His eyes squeezed shut, breathing slowly, remembering things. Hitomi stood directly in front of him, as if a mourning spirit, empathizing, though he did not know it. The room was silent, as if all knew they should let the kid have his space.

"It will help me Lord Van!" The tiny cat, Merle, stepped up.

"Merle—" hushed the brother at the sobbing figure. He gave her a stern look, signifying that she should just leave the kid alone.

Merle shook her head and kept her watery eyes focused on the figure at the doorway. She clenched her tiny paws, as if in bearing of the truth. "I want to know why you're so sad Lord Van! Tell me Lord Van! Just admit it!"

Hitomi gasped as the boy right in front of her spun around looking his little companion of so many years directly in the eyes.

"I am sad for many reasons Merle. I'll admit them to you!" he drew in a deep breath, Hitomi taken away at the passion in his voice. It struck them all with such emphasis, and strength, like a voice that had been waiting to speak for too long.

"First of all, I've lost a friend. I've lost a new friend I was only starting to know. A new friend I'll never be able to see again! I've lost those moments, those memories that I've spent with her! While she was here, I never even bothered to tell her how I really felt! I never understood it myself. Why? Because I've never loved anyone like I loved her. WHY DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND—"

His voice cracked. He supported himself in the doorway to keep from collapsing in tears. His brother, Faulcon stood and came into view, looking at awe in his little brother, lost in his own emotions. Merle gripped her necklace, and shut her eyes, feeling horribly guilty, not wanting to have caused upset. Hitomi stood, breathless, wanting to reach out to the child who kept losing what meant so much to him. She could sense his pain and it overwhelmed her, and she could do nothing to fix that void that grew in him.

"You…" he whispered softly. Pulling himself up, to look his brother, and his best friend in the eye. "You … don't know… how much you love something…. Until you've lost it."

Merle gasped and went running towards him, holding him, hugging him. Van held on, feeling entirely empty, having poured out the last droplet of his emotions. He clinged to his small friend, held on to the dear ones he had left.

"She loved you too… I know she did! I could see it! When she looked at you…." Merle tugged at his shirt, gripping onto him, not wishing him to ever feel so lonely again, saying anything to make it right. Like a true loyal cat, her only desire was to make him happy.

Van managed a smile and looked down at Merle. "I would hope so…. But I just never treated her right when she was here. I made a mistake I'm going to have to live with. I had forgotten to tell her something."

His deep brown eyes once again wandered to the small window, gazing upwards, high above to where two moons shone bright.

"To the girl from the mystic moon, I love you Hitomi Kanzaki, wherever you are."

An impact.

One as surprising and violent as a rivet of thunder struck Hitomi. The blood seemingly drained from her face in utter shock at…. at…. What he had just said! She blinked still entrapped in utter awe.

Blinked once.

Twice.

Then all went black.

"Dear Lord, Hitomi, don't make me call the ambulance!"

A voice echoed on from somewhere. Hitomi couldn't really make sense of it. She lay, feeling paralyzed, even her eyelids too heavy to move. Her senses slowly coming back. Hard. Hard wood floor was piercing at her spine. She squinted, trying to move. Dapples of light seemed to clear away the shadows in her vision. She could see a figure, standing before her, seemingly looking back at her.

"Hitomi? Can you hear me? Oh God, please Hitomi, wake up!"

Corain. Cathy Corain. It took a while for the voice to register in her memory, but now she knew. She blinked a few times, until she could manage to see the dark silhouette of the girl, worried sick, standing above her. As heavy as her arm felt, she reached it upwards, feeling a hand take hers, pulling her, drawing her to her feet.

"Ugh…Allen…" Hitomi managed to utter as she used every inch of effort to remain standing. She gripped her forehead with her fingers, migraine still floating through.

"Amano! She's okay, don't call the police!"

Another figure came running into the living room, holding a wet cloth which he pressed onto Hitomi's warm forehead. It was Amano of course, and he quickly took Hitomi into his arms, sitting down with her on the sofa, lying her head onto a pillow.

"Sssh, now Hitomi, just close your eyes get some rest okay?" His voice was unsteady, cracking, insecure, a voice that had been worried for some time. Although she looked plain exhausted and a little sickly, he was praising the Holy Lord in his mind that she was alright.

Cathy worriedly looked over his shoulder, concerned for her new friend. It was quite the experience, coming home, and happening to stumble on her fainted roommate. She had been so shocked she just screamed, thinking it was worse than it was. She had been relieved to see Hitomi was unconscious, but still alive. But her heart had raced with worry, and confusion, having no idea what to do. Call a doctor. Amano had a degree in medicine and was studying medical practice, so who else was there to turn to. She had been blank with worry, and even until now her heart wouldn't stop pounding.

"I'm okay, I'm okay." Hitomi was starting to come to, and Cathy's face lit up with a load of relief. Hitomi lay motionless in Amano's embrace, absorbing the warmth of her loved one.

"Oh my gosh Hitomi, you gave me such a scare." Amano held onto her tightly, refusing to let go. He had been going crazy with worry, and couldn't bear the thoughts of her being…. Being…. Gone. His heart had frozen when late in the night, his phone had rung and the sound of a desperate frightened voice had yearned at him for help, feeling helpless. The blood had drained from his face; at the very horrible thought that something had gone wrong to the one he cared for so much. And so, he held on, vowing to never again let go.


	3. Omens

# 3.) Omens

Van.

Van Fanel.

Sighing, Hitomi gazed up at her bedroom ceiling. She pointlessly gawked at the varied pattern of bumps, paying particular attention to the insignificant details. She began to notice all these funny little things; like all the water creases she hadn't even noticed before. They stretched on endlessly, breaking off into other little rusty stains all over the white layers of paint. Ugh…. How repulsive. She scrounged up her face in disgust. This was all so… sooo… BORING.

But it was all Hitomi could do to keep her mind from "thinking". The more she lay in bed thinking, the more that 'name' popped up, that mysterious beautiful name that seemed to manifest out of nowhere. She could easily recall that horrible episode she had last night, as much as she wanted to forget it.

But that wasn't what was disturbing her. What was eating at her was the fact that in that hellish… nightmare… she had only heard the boy's _first_ name. So where on earth had "Fanel" come from? In all honesty, she didn't have a clue. She had awaken, to a sunny day smelling of sweet dew, when all of a sudden *** **PANG * and the name hits her. Just like that. Out of nowhere.

Groaning at her miserable self she buried her face into her pillow, only wishing to disappear. That whole night was sooo embarrassing. She must have scared the living hell out of Amano and poor Cathy, who had been innocently coming home with an armful of math books and a box of pizza, which ended up on the floor anyway because she had dropped it in the sudden shock of seeing her fainted friend (and just to take note, Cathy had cleaned up the pizza too).

Hitomi ran her fingers through her short, auburn hair, not knowing what to expect of the day. Rolling over to lazily climb out of bed… she noticed someone.

"Allen??" She gazed surprisingly as she spotted her fiancé, asleep on her dresser chair. A coat was draped on him for a makeshift blanket, his drooping head supported by his hand, his forehead leaning onto Hitomi's wooden dresser.

She smiled softly, admiring the guy's loving dedication. He had just sat there and watched over her all through –

Then Hitomi stopped smiling.

What had she just called him?? **ALLEN**?????!?

ALLEN???

What was wrong with her??? Her right hand came up quickly smacking Hitomi on the forehead. How could she be so stupid??? She just called her own boyfriend, of like four years, ALLEN!!! And Hitomi had a good feeling it wasn't the first time she had accidentally done that.

Scurrying off her bed she quickly eyed Amano, yes Amano, to make sure he was sound asleep, and hadn't heard her utter a sound. But there he sat, looking drained of all energy, and absolutely tuned out. Smiling with worried satisfaction, Hitomi let out a breath of relief. She grabbed one of her toss pillows and tucked it neatly under his chin, and then brought up one of her comforters, snuggly tucking it around him before giving him a little morning kiss.

Then she tiptoed out onwards to the kitchen.

"Mornin' camper, u feelin' better? How's the lil' trooper doin'?" Catherine was already up, sitting on one of the kitchen stools, bowl of Kellogs cereal in one hand. She quickly got to pouring Hitomi some, every so often glancing at her with a sympathetic look.

"Oh he's fine… but I'm sure wondering what's been wrong with me lately. Can you guess what I just called him??"

Cathy looked down at her cereal for a moment… then looking up at Hitomi said, "Hmm… Allen maybe?"

Hitomi froze, spoonful of sugary flakes directly in front of her frozen open mouth.

"You heard??"

"Uh unh," the little brunette shook her head back and forth, grabbing a box full of Fruit Loops (Don't ask about the cereal – Cathy had brought it along with her when she moved in).

"You mentioned that name before… but you were like sub-conscious at the time, so you had no idea you said it."

"What!?" Hitomi glanced back at her in disbelief, also in the pursuit of some more Apple Jacks. "When was this??"

"Last night Tomi, if you don't mind me calling you that, last night, it was the first thing you said when you woke up after that uhh… little 'expedition'… girl you gave me quite the shock, I wasn't planning for you to be the firstdead body I ever see…"

"Last night…" Hard as she tried last night only came in as a blur. She couldn't even come to think of when she had said the name "Allen". It didn't register with her at all.

"Um hum…" Cathy nodded skipping off her stool in journey for more milk.

Hitomi sighed, figuring that trying to remember was just a pointless waste of energy. Try as she might, she could only get recollections of that… that wild vision.

Vision. That was two in a row, the first one wasn't allthat bad. All she saw in her first vision were dragons, dragons and machines, and swords! In this other one… it had the same basics as the first, but that kid and his friends… THAT was something else.

Frighteningly real. She wasn't all in the mood to try and remember it. She eased back on her chair, gazing aimlessly, trying to figure out things but really just felt as puzzled as ever.

CLATTER.

Hitomi's spoon fell to the floor, splattering red and green O's all over the white linoleum.

"Hitomi, what's wrong?" A concerned Cathy spun around alarmed at the sudden noise. She turned to see Hitomi, almost paralyzed again with shock, staring intently at Cathy's cereal bowl. Cereal bowl???

"N-n-othing…" Hitomi lied, voice wavering.

But it was something. Something was very wrong.

There Hitomi sat frozen, hands gripping the counter top. She couldn't tear her eyes away, her eyes away from that bowl. Cathy's bowl, sitting only a few inches away from hers. A bowl full of floating Alpha Bits, soaking in milk. Of course this wasn't what amazed her. It was the letters themselves. Floating, forming something that scared her more than anything else.

The first omen.

A 

VFNL 

## ANE

* * *

Dr. Nathaniel Teroka 

Professional Psychiatrist 

Professor of Psychological Studies at Warden University 

Hitomi gripped onto the little business card she held in her hand. She tapped it rhythmically on her palm, looking over it again and then tapping it again. Obviously, her mind was lost in thought. She had given this plenty of thought, so much so that she gotten lost in it. Finally in conclusion, she figured two horribly realistic visions and an eerie message from floating cereal just didn't sound too sane. She really couldn't make much sense if any, out of this whole mess.

She shuddered, pulling up her scarf higher round her chin. She glanced every so often through the store windows, lazily window shopping. Hitomi couldn't be happier about having these care-free weekends off. She wouldn't have a clue what to make of her crisis if she also had a job to watch over at the same time. But Sundays don't last forever, and she agonized over the thought of returning to work in only a few hours.

She stopped interested as she spotted a cute little bakery store just off the corner of Sherman and Victoria. Peering in, she spotted a delicious array of pastry treats. Her eyes yielded a fantastic variety of crullers,doughnuts, cinnamon buns, and pastry flakes. Her stomach drooled with hunger, probably feeling four different kinds of cereal was just not enough. Besides, pastries had always been a delicious love of Hitomi's.

She pulled open the door, glad to be escaping the cold. A small jingle of chimes rung above her head, and she was swept with the aroma of fresh-baked goods.

'Ooooohh.. YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY!' her mind screamed with delight. Hitomi was just thankful she didn't say those kind of things out loud, she'd look like an immature 20yr old in Toys R' Us.

But fact had it that she _was_ surrounded by 'yummy' foods. And this brought up the whole thought of something else.

"Um, excuse me, you have such a wonderful amount of cakes here… tell me.. do you cater weddings?"

She inquired at the small, heavy built man on the other side of the counter. Smiling at her, he pushed up his small reading glasses on his round button nose ('somewhat like Santa' –boy Hitomi was sure getting immature), and tightened his apron round his waist.

"What's that young lady now? The cappuccino machine is such a nuisance…"

"Umm.. wedding cakes.. do you make any?" She was practically yelling, as that insolent machine continued grinding away an aromatic bunch of coffee beans.

"Wedding cakes you say? Oh sure of course, what's a bakery shop without them?" Laughing merrily (again the Santa features occurred in Hitomi's mind) and guided her to the display cases near the front of the shop. Many beautiful wedding cakes lined up; each looking as pleasant as the last.

"Oooh they're gorgeous indeed; how could anyone eat them?" Hitomi pushed her face up to the glass, feeling all giddy inside, eyeing each and every beauty of a cake, one after the other.

"Yep, they pretty alright, but they definitely for eating." The heavy-lidded man grinned, looking all jolly like, and then took a closer look at Hitomi.

She glanced up at him, who stared back down at her, feeling a little awkward.

"Wait a sec, I know you!" He continued to peer at her.

"You do?" She peered back, eyebrows raised with curiosity.

"Sure thing, little miss, you the bride-to-be of Amano Nekuchi now aren't ya?"

Hitomi nodded, seriously wondering how on earth Amano managed to somehow know almost everyone in the city. She was starting to feel like a mini-celebrity of sorts.

"Yes, that's me, Hitomi Kanzaki," she smiled politely, reaching out her hand.

"Pleasure to meet ya at last in person, Amano gave me a pic of the two of you, adorable like bunnies you two are, indeed. That Amano, I taught him as a kid, in my schooling days you know… he's all rattled up bout your wedding, he got us to get him the finest cake in the house! Here, I'll go get you a pic of how your dream cake will be lookin' like…"

The jolly man disappeared behind a green door, on to fetch Hitomi a picture of yet another irresistible cake, only of course, this one she would actually get to eat! (Well, not the picture). She sat herself down in one of the chairs by the pantry, absolutely stunned at how much better she felt. It was all a matter of getting her head out of the clouds and back on track.

A few people sat by her as well, sipping on large mugs of cappuccinos and lattes and what-nots, enjoying some easy-going conversations. Well, this was interesting. It was a sort of café/bakery. Wafts of fresh bread and creamed coffee floated in, and Hitomi eased back and relaxed, feeling she could sit there forever, just breathing in the scent of the bakery/café place thing. She sat, listening to the quiet drone of the people talking, or the never-ending grinding of the many caffeine-beverage-making machines.

She stared on out the window, watching people hustle down their business through the jammed streets of Victoria and Sherman. Ahh, and here she was, just a-lazily sitting, missing the whole clots of rush hour. The weather was quite sunny, but a sharp cold breeze took all the fun from the sun.

Wait a sec…. Something was off.

Now that was odd, it wasn't everyday Hitomi would see what looked like feathers, yes feathers, floating on downwards. She got up for a minute to take a better look. Cupping her hands around the shop window; she confirmed that she wasn't loosing her mind after all. White feathers slowly drifted from the clouds above, many of them, everywhere she looked! They looked as soft as cotton, and began to line the sidewalks, tops of awnings, street sides and everywhere.

Peering in confusion, Hitomi quickly glanced upwards to see if she could catch sight of any sort of super large bird shedding its coat up there. But there was none to be seen, besides, it would've been much too early and too cold for the winged creatures to have returned already for spring.

She used her hand to dim out the sunlight to look on upwards, hoping to see the shadow of a large hovercraft of some sort. But as hard as she gazed she couldn't find any sign of floating blimps or air balloons or anything that could have been pointlessly sending a bunch of feathers downwards.

Still looking up, she couldn't even spot any maniac throwing the feathers down from any one of the windows in the high-rises that loomed above them. So just what was going on? She was about to turn and question someone, when she noticed ANOTHER odd thing. NOBODY else seemed to see the feathers! No one! The people on the streets waltzed on like it was a good ole average day just happening to have falling feathers… yeah that was normal alright.

Spinning around, she saw that the handful of people, in the café, were busily discussing endless topics, not one bit concerned on what was going on in their surroundings. Hitomi stood there appalled. She may not live downtown, but it doesn't take s genius to notice something was up, or in this case, falling down.

She felt her forehead for a second, checking to make sure she wasn't sick, and then noticed that man come on back out from the backdoor in the shop. In one hand he balanced a plateful of newly baked gingerbread cookies, and in the other he studied a thick cake catalog.

"Here you go miss, try one of these new lil' ginger men we got going," He continued to munch on the one in his hand.

"Umm… uh maybe later, thank you, but do you have many birds around here? And I mean MANY of them?"

The man glanced up curiously at the young lady that stood before him, then on outside. "Birds you say?"

"Yes, white ones, especially."

"No sirree! We get 'em pigeons on in the summer to fall kinda thing, but never once did I see a dove round this bum-ridden place." He pushed up his eyeglasses once again, studying Hitomi over wondering about the question.

'Doves', Hitomi thought for a second. She wondered now, thinking about those feathers. They were much too large to be any part of a little creature like a dove, more like something bigger with wings like that.

Pure, white striking feathers, soft as satin. Large feathers a part of very large wings. Wings of… not a bird of any sort, almost like wings, wings… wings of an angel???? It was totally absurd, but seemingly the explanation fit.

"But those feathers outside… is there some sort of celebration going on? Where are they coming from??" Hitomi studied the man now for an answer.

He stared blankly back at her, and then back out the windows. Then back at Hitomi.

"I'm sorry there, Ms. Kanzaki, but you totally lost me somewhere round heres."

"The feathers sir! They're everywhere! Look, all over –"

She froze. It must have been the third time today! Her arm was extended, pointing on to the shop windows, her eyes pasted on the windows, but her mind stuck in an array of disbelief! NO WAY!!!

She shakily walked on up to the windows, again cupping her hand round and peeking outside.

There lay the streets, the sidewalks, the awnings, with not one, NOT ONE, feather in sight. She could feel her face turn ghostly pale, then tomato red with embarrassment. Here she stood just minutes before, absolutely paranoid, and now an inch more to being convinced she had entirely lost it. LOST IT. Those stinking feathers were there!! WERE THERE!!! She had seen it with her very own eyes! And no matter if she was half blind with cataracts she could never mistake floods of feathers floating from the sky!! She had been positive, certain, everything!!!! That was it! She had just lost it!

"Um, miss, is there something I can do??"

Hitomi shook her head frantically. She absent-mindly grabbed for her purse, and quickly headed on out the door. The chimes rung out wildly, interrupted by the man calling.

"Ms. Kanzaki, your cake?" He waved the catalog above his head confused.

"I-I've got to run," Hitomi replied, a little shakily. She gave a last glance and almost crying out in confused tears, disappeared around the corner, running through the featherless streets.

* * *

"Hitomi! Long time no see, what's it been, two days?" Yukari laughingly joked hitting Hitomi in the arm.

Hitomi stood there, still recovering from the cold, glad to be safe and weather protected in Yukari's newly renovated hallway of her condo. She was still frozen from her two, TWO eerie experiences in one half of a day, not to mention the insanity she wentthrough the night before (and also the night before that!).

Sighing she stepped on in and collapsed onto Yukari's retractable lazy-boy.

"Weelll…. Someone's not very happy to see their best friend," Yukari moaned dropping down beside Hitomi on the arm of the chair. "That damn Amano is taking my place now isn't he? He gets to be your best friend noooww… well * bleck * to him!" She grinned now quite concerned at Hitomi's straight face.

"Girl, you be asking for some coa-coa now ain't ya? You COULD JUST ASK you know, you don't have to look all grumpy-like for me to get the message. I get my lazy ass up sometimes you know." Yukari hung up Hitomi's coat and disappeared into the kitchen.

She grabbed a stool to stand on, and reached far back to the highest cabinet, in search for more coa-coa powder. Climbing down off her counter, she couldn't help but wonder what was going on with her best friend. She remembered leaving Hitomi a few messages a few days ago on some wedding tid-bits, but Hitomi hadn't returned the call. And now this. What was going on with the girl?

'Calm down there Yukari,' she hushed to herself. 'The girl's got to be concentrated on the wedding, you know that."

She struggled to balance the two hot mugs of coa –coa and held a bag of plump marshmallowswith her teeth.

"Here, I hope you're happy!" Grinning, she settled the drinks down on the coffee table and sat herself down in the armchair across from Hitomi's.

"Thanks," Hitomi took the cup and softly sipped it, not even glancing once at Yukari.

'So much for gratefulness,' Yukari muttered under her breath. But she felt kind of bad too. Something was wrong with the girl.

"Hitomi," Yukari put her glass down, clanging with the plastic server tray. "What _is _up with you lately? Coming in here all pissed without a word, that's not how its gonna be!" She studied her deeply for some sort of expression.

"Oh I'm sorry," Hitomi mumbled. "I really don't mean to be rude or anything; that's why I'm here, to tell you bout the crap that's been going on." She gazed down at the dark brownness of her coa-coa, mesmerized by the little ripples of chocolate.

"Hmm," Yukari pondered. "Is it about, those… those dreams that you've been having?" She glanced up at her.

"How did you know?" Hitomi inquired, surprised to see everyone was always such a step ahead.

"Amano, he called me yesterday night I think, he sounded really wound up! I was worried about you girl!"

"Ooh, well everyone was. I'm not even sure how well I'm doing myself. Everything's just been so awkward today… its not even funny."

"Well, no matter how strange, you know I won't laugh, come on girl, spill."

Hitomi looked back at Yukari's earnest eyes. Sighing, she began retelling the whole little episode of last night. Then she moved on to the strange happenings of this very day. The two horribly weird events.

"Now THAT is awkward," Yukari took the last sip of her drink. "But it seemingly adds up, doesn't it?"

"Adds up? How so?" Hitomi's voice stressed, thinking nothing made the least bit of sense.

"Weeelll, its like this is all happening at one time. I don't care whether you believe in fortune telling or not, but face it, you were always good at predicting these kind of things before, so good that people asked you to help them with their future!"

"Yeah so? That was before, this is now. What do weird related dreams and messages have to do with my future?"

"Think about it this way. You stopped your fortune telling years ago—"

"It was false. Blasphemy. That's why."

"Well yes, I'm sure everyone was a little critical of it. But still, it helped you determine what you were in for. Now, you have no idea what's to come of you and your life. And we both know, these eerie premonitions only come when needed right?"

"Yeah, maybe so."

"Well, what better time than now? The wedding has an ENOURMOUS affect on your life! You don't know how it's to turn out! Maybe, just maybe, these visions of sorts are trying to guide you through it."

Hitomi blankly stared back at her, barely considering the thought. She had convinced herself, she was most-likely just crazy. Hitomi was crazy, is crazy and always will be crazy.

"Bullshit Yukari! How the hell is that going to help me any? I'm in love with some sort of Allen person, or maybe a giant dragon is going to attack my wedding, or I should wear wings with my dress? What huh?"

Yukari glanced back hurt. "Well fine, just fine. Don't listen to my advice, it won't get you anywhere."

"Girl, I'm sorry," Hitomi sighed. "This isn't easy to figure out, I know, but I'll give your theory some more solid thought."

Yukari smiled. Now that was the Hitomi she liked to hear. Confident. She couldn't stand Hitomi without confidence, without it the girl was just a wobbly mess she had to direct this way and that. In the midst of chewing down half a marshmallow, she brainstormed something.

"I've got it! I know how we can test this thing!"

"Huh? Test?" Hitomi stared back up at her questionably, eyebrows raised.

"Yes, test! She jumped up excitedly. "I don't know if you still remember Hito-girl, but you should give it a shot with one of these!"

Yukari scrimmaged through loads of paper and stationary in her little oak desk, finally burrowing far enough to find…

"Aha! I've got it…. Eureka!" Yukari proudly held up a divine deck of cards.

"OMIGOSH! My cards! Yukari, you have them??" Hitomi jumped up as well, inspecting her good old taro cards from looooonng ago. She opened the package, and inspected each and every one, trying to remember what each character symbolized.

"Ahh, in mint condition too. Yeah, I have them. Your mother gave it to me to hold on to."

"Oh I see," Hitomi babbled sarcastically. "She was trying to keep me from using them, right?"

"Uh…. I really don't know!" Yukari replied innocently, shrugging her shoulders, not wanting to get involved in any old family rivalries. "Just get crackin, will ya?"

Hitomi smiled, finally happy to see her high-point in the day. She spread out the cards on the table, to make sure not one of them was missing, and drew out the blank card and sat it by her side.

"Wow, its been ages."

"Yeah I know!" Yukari sat there eyeing the vast collection. Her heart leaped, remembering the times when she had great faith in those cards; for until now she knew not one time when those cards had fore-seen something and got it wrong.

"So, what fortune should I look up?" Hitomi inquired, deck ready by her side.

"Yours of course! Try to make sense of all this!"

"Alright, but I'll probably mess up somewhere or other." Hitomi's eyes narrowed and focused on the deck. Did she remember how this went again? A part of her did, and she hoped to get it right…

Closing her eyes to add to the suspense, she drew out the first card, laying it on the table diagonal to herself.

"The.. The Forked Path…" Hitomi lay her fingers on the card, studying it, gazing at the picture of intertwined trails.

"And so??? What does that mean Hitomi?" Yukari feverishly tugged at her sleeve.

"Hold on, hold on… it means… it means that there is a major decision to be made, but the path leads off into two different directions, _meaning_, two different results."

"Oooh, I see," Yukari glanced at the card, puzzling over what "decisions" Hitomi possibly had to make. Was it "Should I marry Amano?" and the whole "Should I not marry Amano?"…. could that possibly be what was disturbing her?

"Don't think about it so hard just yet," Hitomi smiled watching her pondering friend. "I have to draw four more cards to form the star, and the final conclusion."

"Oh…" Yukari watched interested as Hitomi drew out another card, adding it to the left point of the star of cards.

"Hmm," Hitomi furrowed her brows at the next card, a picture of man on a stallion. "The Knight… the knight is a sign of a noble man… who is going to play an important role in your life…"

"Hey!" Yukari hooted. "This is starting to work out!! That is sooo obviously Amano! Cool!"

Hitomi nodded skeptically, still glancing at the card.

"Isn't it?" Yukari froze in mid-cheer.

"Maybe, I haven't come to anything just yet, take a look at this card," Hitomi lay down on the right point a card with a brave soldier holding onto a sword, some sort of mythical creature standing in the background.

"This is the dragon slayer, also said to be a noble warrior, but often contrary to the knight…."

"Contrary?" Yukari studied the card. "So you mean the knight and the slayer are competitors?"

Hitomi studied the two points of the star. "Not necessarily; but often times they are on different ends of the table if you know what I mean; one brings up one fortune; the other brings up a totally different one."

Yukari nodded, starting to see something to build. Two paths. Two choices. Two men. She looked upwards and questioned Hitomi for a second. Could the cards be telling her what Hitomi had never been willing to say?

"Oh no… the Stream." Hitomi lay down a card, filled with the image of a lonely stream, rustling down a forest. "The Stream card is the sign of illusion. Something that you believe will make you happier in life, but in all truth takes away from your spirit and adds to your anxiety."

"Ooh… Hitomi… tell me, do you have any idea of what this means?" She looked earnestly at her friend, hoping for a response. She had good feeling that Hitomi understood everything the cards said about her fate.

But Hitomi could only shake her head, probably not wanting to reveal anything until the end.

"And now, the last card," she placed it down on the table. "Oh would you look at that, it's the King." A picture of a large king sat on the last point of the star.

"The King is the card of good fortune. This card determines true happiness, and the right road in life."

"We-e-ellll… interesting may I say!" Yukari folded her arms proudly, glad to see her faith in Hitomi's powers hadn't let her down after all.

Hitomi nodded. But she knew Yukari didn't understand any of it, much less than she did. What did this all mean? Two choices? Hitomi only knew of one major decision she had to make. Only one. There was only one path, one man, one fate. Then why had she been given two options?

"Hitomi," Yukari sat and gave her a concerned look. "This may not be any of my business; but seeing as we _are_ good friends, you can trust me to keep it secret if there is a 'someone else' in your life."

Hitomi stared back at Yukari shocked. "Another man?? How could you possibly come to imagine anyone else between myself and Amano? These cards are nonsense! That's all they are! I don't understand them."

She swiped the table rid of cards, and her fortune fell to the floor. Hitomi stood impatiently, and sat on the arm of the sofa, head in hands, refusing to believe anything.

Yukari slowly stood.

She glanced at Hitomi, with eyes of sympathy, and a different view of things.

"Hitomi, I never thought I would be the one to say this, but you're starting to sound like your mother."


	4. Beautiful Stranger

# Beautiful Stranger

"_…Have you ever loved somebody so much it makes yooouuu cry… have you ever needed something so bad you can't… sleep at night…"_ Hitomi hummed on aimlessly, as she twisted the phone cord round her index finger.

"Come on, Yukari, pick up…" she groaned, eyeing her watch. Only 4:15; she had two more hours to go and Hitomi had quite run out of work to do hours before. While listening to the endless ringing on the other end of the line she organized her desk for what seemed the billionth time. She really had to stop finishing her work so quickly.

Suddenly, the other receiver picked up and after a few odd rustling noises, Yukari finally came on the other end, panting to catch her breath.

"Oh, Hitomi its you," she huffed, taking a glance at her call display. "Are you already off work?"

Hitomi swished her head back and forth (forgetting she was on the phone and Yukari couldn't even see her),"Nah.. I just finished typing in all these transcripts already, and I've just started printing out these shipping schedules.. which is actually tomorrow's work…."

"Oh really," Yukari, having relaxed a bit, flopped on her couch with the cordless phone. "I just got home from Center Mall, there's like, this massive sidewalk sale! It's madness!!"

"Sidewalk sale on a Monday?"

"Yeah… I know, but its jam packed; the prices are unbelievable….you really should check it out. But anyway, I have this good feeling you weren't calling to discuss my shopping issues now were you?" Yukari cradled the phone on her shoulder, knowing it wasn't very often when Hitomi would risk calling her during work hours.

Hitomi smiled, and sipped on her coffee. "Yukari! Quit thinking I'm gonna get fired just for calling you! I'll have you know that I've got 10 more minutes of break time to go."

"Oooooh," She sighed with relief. "That's good. So what's up with you? All I've been doing lately is studying for that exam at Warden; the whole shopping thing was just kind of a break."

"Aaah, lucky you…" Hitomi moaned, stretching her neck back, sensing her eyes were strained from the computer monitor. "I've been here toooo long."

"Hey, you're still getting paid at least," Yukari tore open a box of cookies,resting her head on a pillow. 'Poor Hitomi,' she thought. 'Typing away while I'm here lounging pretending to be studying'.

"Anyway," Hitomi sighed. "I just wanted to ask you something." She eased back on her computer chair gawking upwards at the buzzing fluorescent lights up above.

"Yeaah…. Shoot Hitomi…." Yukari mumbled, mouth full of sugar-bread cookies.

"I've just been thinking. You're right you know, maybe I did dismiss that whole reading a little too early yesterday. God knows the last thing I want is to be anything like my mom…. So tell me, can you remember anything about *** ahem *** you know…"

Yukari's eyebrows furrowed with curiosity. "Uh… no I don't know…. At least I don't think I know…."

"Ooooh YES YOU KNOW!" Hitomi nearly yelled into the receiver, 'gosh, Yukari could be so slow'.

"Are you referring to all that happened… like decades agooo? The whole 'disappearance' and everything?" She raised an eyebrow, still spitting crumbs in every direction, figuring this was the only topic where Hitomi would refuse just to say it aloud.

"Well… not DECADES ago…. Like a few years…."

"Oh Hitomi…" Yukari sighed. "I thought you were already over all this….." Yukari lazily eyed a chocolate covered biscuit wondering why on earth Hitomi would bring up this topic. For YEARS she had tried to get Hitomi to talk about it, but noooo the girl would never mention a word, or at least claimed that she 'forgot'. To be honest, Hitomi had been quite, well let's just put it, 'odd' when she had first returned. It was like she didn't even trust Yukari. Like they were never even friends. In the end she had given up. Yukari had just went along with Hitomi's mother's theory. Mrs. Kanzaki's theory that stated that Hitomi had been kidnapped, yes kidnapped, for that entire period of four months. Kidnapped by some ballistic psycho, with such disturbing experiences it left Hitomi in such an utter state of paranoia when she returned. Thus Hitomi made up many wild claims, implausible claims; maybe because she was afraid… afraid of telling anything about her kidnapper in worries that he or she would track her down.

"Why would you want to talk about this? It's never been any of my business." Yukari closed up the box of cookies, sitting up straight on her couch.

"Well, its not like we ever really talked about it… but Yukari, do you remember anything that I told you after I returned?"

"Yeah… a bit of stuff here and there, but it was like six years ago."

"Five… but anyway, what kind of things did I tell you?"

"Well," Yukari wasn't so sure how to respond. She could barely recall exactly what Hitomi had 'claimed' had happened, but she did remember that whatever it was, it was absolutely mind-boggling. The kind of stuff you see on sci-fi shows or something.

"You said a lot of things about…"

"About??" Hitomi looked worriedly at the clock stationed above her. Only five more minutes to go of her break.

"Hitomi, I'll be honest with you. WEIRD THINGS. You said a lot about these weird, I don't know, just crazy things! I can only remember you told me once about some wild story and when I refused to believe you, you were mad at me for like three weeks!"

Hitomi's face grew bright red. She remembered that too. She did remember being a little, 'extreme' back then. But there was something about that 'time' that had done that to her. Something about it that was so real, and when everyone dismissed her as insane, well of course she'd grow upset, it was only natural.

"Girl, don't worry. You know I'm not like that anymore. I'm not going to start up on any fairy tale, but I do need you to help me remember just what had happened. Whatever it is I told you then, please tell me now."

She suddenly looked up to see Eric, peering above her cubicle walls. She smiled faintly, as he tapped his watch and signaled to the clock above. He walked in, binders and piles of paper on hand.

She softly placed her hand on the mouth piece. "Hey, what's going on?"Hitomi gradually noticed that many of her office mates were making their way out of the building.

"Didn't you hear the announcement?" Eric pointed to the speaker of p.a. system in her cubicle.

Hitomi bit her lip. She must've been too busy talking to Yukari to have noticed any sort of announcement.

"No.. why?"

"Well, we're going home an hour early on Monday's now… due to the rescheduling this month."

"Omigosh, that's right. I forgot entirely." Hitomi held onto the phone, not wishing to cut Yukari off so soon.

"Damn, Yukari, I have to go. Looks like I'm heading home already."

"Already?" Yukari looked over at her kitchen clock. Hitomi usually had about 45 minutes more to go.

"Yep, I guess I'll talk to you later."

"Wait Hitomi," Yukari stood, serious tone in her voice. "I know its not healthy for you to go about _remembering_ that time, and I may regret this later, but still… if you really need it, all you have to do is go to your psychiatrist's office and ask for your session tapes. He'll have them."

Hitomi flashed a giant grin. "Yukari! What a brilliant idea!! Thanks!!!" Her face lit with glee. Literally.

"Cya." Yukari smiled momentarily, turning off her cordless and softly brushing back her maroon accented bangs, quietly hoping she wasn't influencing Hitomi in any way to start up anything odd.

Hitomi hung the phone back on the cradle, happy to have such an ingenious friend like Yukari. The session tapes, of course! Why hadn't she thought of it herself? All those interviews with Dr. Teroka had all been recorded on tape. She couldn't forget eyeing that tape recorder in the middle of the table at each appointment feeling horribly intimidated. She was sure she could find easy access to them.

"What's with the great news?" Eric kindly helped Hitomi with her thick winter coat, seeing as she was too overwhelmed with her discovery. "You look like you won the lotto or something."

"I wish.. its just some little thing," 'some little thing my foot' Hitomi snickered in her mind "Anyway, I heard you're going to Africa for a few weeks right?"

"Um hum! Gonna use up most of my spring holidays on it, but oh well…" Shutting off the lights in her small cubicle; they made their way down the hallways.

Hitomi gave him a curious look, "You are going to make it back in time for my wedding now aren't you?"

"Hitomi, its only going to be two weeks! Any longer and my mom will have a heart-attack. She's been going on and on about how my grandmother will force me to stay there or something." His mother. It was her idea to send him back home to visit his relatives and now she was getting all possessive on making sure he was 'just visiting'.

"Well I would be glad to, your escaping the cold." They stepped onto the elevator, Hitomi pressing onto the ground floor button.

"Yeah, that I won't mind. I'll bring you back something Egyptian for your wedding." He nudged her slightly, knowing exactly how she'd react.

"YOUR GOING TO EGYPT???" Hitomi exclaimed wildly and tugged at his coat sleeve, like a little child wanting to come along.

"Just for a bit, but my family lives in South Africa you know… but hey, why not drop by the Sphinx while I'm in the same continent and all." He grinned, looking down at her excited glooming eyes.

"Aah, Egypt. What a mythical place," she dazed. Hitomi had always had an interest in anthropology. She had wanted to learn about the cultures of the Egyptian people; it always amazed her on how they could direct their fates by the power of the stars, the belief in the unknown.

"I hope you have a great trip," Hitomi happily smiled as they stepped off the elevator, ground floor at last.

"Same here! Well, I'll see you tomorrow eh Tomi?" Eric gave her a last smile, digging for his car keys in his attaché case.

"Sure thing," Hitomi waved off as he made his way to the basement parking lot. She stood in the lobby of her office building, buttoning up her coat, looking out at the blistering cold. Already the sky had taken a night glow; dark and mysterious. The sun seemed to disappear more and more these days.

"Well, Dr. Teroka's office isn't far from here, I might as well walk," she thought to herself, pushing open the main doors. The heavy things seemed to weigh back at her, as the wind continued to push forwards from the outside.

"Blast it!!" The cold seemed horribly frigid today, biting at her skin, making the hair rise on her arms. Just so cold; too cold!. Her teeth chattered hard against her jaw, and she dug her hands far into her jacket pockets, concealed from icy snow droplets that pelted across her face. Almost instantly her earlobes and nose seemed to freeze right over with numbness, and she only longed to run right back into the office.

Well, it was worth all of these winter miseries if she could only get her hands on those session tapes. She wasn't really all too sure what she wanted to find in them. Maybe she'd have a better clue if she knew why on earth she needed them in the first place. But Hitomi…. Well… she just wasn't sure of herself anymore. Unsure of any decision she had to make; not trusting herself. Maybe, just maybe this wedding did need thinking over after all. Too soon? Maybe it was too soon. Maybe this was what all these signs were telling her. Adding together to form this sort of subliminal message informing her to think things twice. But what she couldn't quite figure out was, how would the session tapes help her think things over? Bottom line- It wouldn't. She wanted those tapes for some other reason, another reason she was yet to find out.

The cold was really starting to get to her, and her raggedy scarf was a poor excuse of protection for her face. And now, she wasn't even certain whether her earlobes were still attached to her body or not. Shivering and chattering, feeling downright frozen, she quickly cut across the busy streets, figuring a quick shortcut through Gore Park wouldn't hurt.

She quickly huffed through the twining brick paths, careful of any black ice on the way. Ugh, the last thing she needed was an embarrassing public collision with the ground. She couldn't trust her shoes. They went this way and that and she knew in any second they were bound to give way. Half her senses inclined that she maybe should keep a hand on the little fence surrounding the path but the other half commanded her to keep her hands fixed over her ears to keep them free from frostbite.

"Grrrr……" her teeth continued to clatter, and after a few steps Hitomi finally came to notice the dark skies, her dark surroundings. She could barely see! Well that made her situation sooo much better. Icy path in the dark. 'I swear,' she muttered. 'Someone's out to get me.' Sighing miserably she relieved her balance issues by holding desperately on the rail but forcing her ears to endure the -20 gazillion temperatures.

Blink.

Blink, in just a second's time what was like a miracle at the moment occurred. It lit up. The park that is. It literally lit in second's time, _millions _and_ millions_ of lights coated each and every branch of each and every tree. Hitomi stopped. She just had to stop. She was absolutely breathless.

It was just _STUNNING_.

Stunning. There wasn't much else you could say to describe it. The scene was so divine, she couldn't think of anything that could come close to matching such an array of beauty. The lights, the hundreds of thousands of lights, twinkled softly into the night, glowing like miniature candles illuminating the dark skies, shining like the sparkling stars. Their friendly glow cast many rays of light throughout the entire park. You could see it all, end to end, Gore Park being one of the largest parks in the city. Even weeks later, Christmas garlands still enwrapped the rails of the gateways, red ribbons on every post. It all added quite nicely to the spirit of things. The lights glimmered an interesting pattern scattered on the white snow, happily reflecting the beams which shone upon it, helping make the park glow with soul.

Hitomi smiled end to end, feeling on top ofa cloud. Sure it was cold, sure she was tired, and so what if it was only five and it was already pitch black; this one little park could easily take that all far, far away. She strolled onwards not too concerned about ice, or pelting snow, it all seemed to calm as if on signal, the second the lights came on. Now she breathed in the fresh, aspen air, watching as the lazy snowflakes drizzled on from a sky like dark satin.

And wasn't it marvelous…Gore Park that is. This place always seemed to draw her breath away no matter what time of what season. In the fall, she would always take her autumn strolls, clinging onto Amano's arm, laying her head gently on his shoulder. They would sit by the park bench admiring the ever changing colours that spread amongst the trees; the rippling of the stream below the wooden bridge, or the dapples of sunlight that warmed their skin. In the summer they would enjoy the longest picnics from noon till sunset, and an occasional game of badminton in the Spring. And even in the midst of winter, this one little paradise seemed to be everything that could matter.Hitomi, still smiling ear to ear, shut her eyes and pictured all the things that were going _right_ in her life. The wedding. The wedding as white as the snow that surrounded her; filled with love and happiness and everything she could possibly dream of… love forever…. What could possibly be better than that?

"Um, excuse me?"

Hitomi spun around quickly, taken aback by the voice. A voice. She had almost forgotten she wasn't alone in the park. As a matter of fact, she had been almost certain her mind had been lost in a world of it's own. Blushing slightly, she turned to see who was speaking to her…

"Oh…" Her voice trailed. Just trailed onto another universe or something; for at the moment she knew she couldn't speak. She was still trying her best to think straight! That may be because her mind had just frozen over…. Simply froze right over at the sight of _him. _

Him, as in the guy that stood directly in front of her and had asked for her attention. The guy that stood directly in front of her at that very moment that made her heart leap in sudden surprise, her eyes glow with curiosity. There he stood, almost covered in the shade of the trees, face shadowed with mystery. Hitomi didn't know what to think. It must've been a minute now that her brain had gone bye-bye.

The shoes.

Let's start with the shoes. Afraid to look him in the eye for some intimidating reason, she just stared blankly at his shoes he wore upon his feet. Yes, his shoes. They were shoes, not boots even with this snow, but then again, it's not like guys like him went around in rubber boots with Velcro tie-ups or anything. What was she thinking? Those shoes, shiny they were, professional looking, giving off a glow from the street lamps above. They were… well she couldn't tell the colour, too dim for that, but she was quite certain they were a polished black.

He wore a trench coat. A long one. It stretched on down to his knees, and he was quite tall, looming over Hitomi by a few inches. And she was quite tall too. His trench coat, black as ash, was kind of fuzzy, probably soft, with large round buttons tying the coat together. His body was thin, built just the way she liked 'em, tall and slender, the intriguing yet strong type.

Suddenly, Hitomi jerked her head up, not wanting to put up with the suspense, and then she came close to fainting at the sight of his face. What was wrong with her? He was just some stranger in the midst of a park stroll… maybe even a homicidal maniac for all she cared and here she was adoring him? Well, then again, you haven't seen his face. So what if it was half covered in the darkness? She probably would have fainted if she were to see him in broad daylight! Oh it was wondrous! He was wondrous! So beautiful it made the park look pretty lame and ugly, that's howimpressive his image was. She had seen her fair share of handsome lads in her life, but there was just something, something incredible about this one. He stood, a comforting smile on his face, reassuring her; he looked pretty sane, and holding something towards her.

She just noticed.

"I found this, it was just lying back there in the snow …" oh that voice. Incredibly familiar. So compelling! It went so very well with his deeply intriguing face, the jet black bangs hiding his eyes. What was he saying? Oh right, something he had found. He held it towards her.

"Oh…" pretty much all Hitomi had managed to say since the second he had tapped her on the shoulder. Her eyes were fixed on his hand taking the longest time to notice what lay within it. A necklace. _Her _necklace. The one with the pendant, from her grandmother.

"How did that ever…" she looked at him curiously in the eye, slowly extending her hand to retrieve it. "Oh my, thank you! This thing is really special to me… wow… most people would have just kept it."

Smiling now, a wonderful smile, "It was no problem, I had a good feeling something as rare as that was bound to have a fair share of sentimental value." Stepping a bit into the dim light radiating from the lamp he gladly dropped it into her hands.

She looked it over, still gleaming as it usually did, but differently. She couldn't quite make it out so well in the nightlight, but it almost… almost glowed. Well, something like that, she couldn't explain it. It seemed to give off its own light, shining all by itself.. reacting to something…but how?

She looked up to check if he could see it too, but the handsome stranger had his deep dark eyes locked onto his surroundings, also admiring the beauty of the park they stood in. His eyes twinkled with the reflection of the lights around them, snow sparkling in his smooth jet black hair, dotting his darkish gray coat.

Hitomi still stared curiously, then blushed horribly as he glanced at her out of the corner of his eye, noticing his little spectator. But he just smiled, warming his hands in his pockets.

"This is a wonderful place isn't it?" Hitomi awkwardly tried to make conversation, seeing as none of them were moving anywhere.

"Tell me about it," he agreed, turning to face her, a friendly look on his face. Why was she trusting him? Why did he seem so trustworthy? Why on earth did she feel so shy?

"I think its gorgeous, and I'm not even big on mushy stuff like that."

She grinned facing him. She could tell. He didn't look like the emotional sensitive type, though she guessed the park must've been an exception.

"Well, you don't have to be to admire a creation like this."

"I know…." He nodded. "Its so… its just like the most…."

"The most romantic thing you've ever seen?" Hitomi filled in, smiling, looking at him. "It sure is in my case. These kind of things look like they came straight out of a chick flick."

"Oh ha…. I guess so. This_ is_ amazing, but definitely not the most romantic thing I've ever seen." He looked over again at the park, him looking shrouded with mystery.

"Its not??? What could be much more romantic or beautiful than this?"

He then smiled, as he did always, and looked lost adrift in thought. "The one thing that could answer that question is this one girl."

"Oh really…" Hitomi sounded a little disappointed. Wait a minute. Why is she disappointed again? So what if the guy was hooked up already? So was she dammit!

"I don't mean to pry," Hitomi tucked her hands feverishly in her pockets, almost nervously.

"Its no bother, really. My friend, he had this amazing girl to call his own… they didn't really know it or show it for that matter, but anyone could tell it was love, ever since the day they met."

Hitomi studied him, listened intently.

"Anyway, there was this one day, when she got upset at him, and she threatened to leave and that's just what she did. She left, and he tried to cover up, pretend as if he couldn't care."

Hitomi looked on sympathetically. The way this guy went about speaking of it, she had a pretty swell feeling that "his friend" was basically an alias for himself.

"She was gone to her own home; and even if he never said a word, anyone could read him like a book. He was just depressed, he had lost her, and he couldn't say if he'd ever see her again. He took her for granted."

"Well, I'm sure he truly did love her inside, while she was there," Hitomi input thoughtfully, worried about all the emotions she could sense from him.

"I guess he did, but this kid obviously didn't make a deal of it while she was around. But his best friend easily figured him out, and had offered him the advice to go after her…. To not let go of love."

"What a nice friend," Hitomi nodded, looking on aimlessly thinking things. Wow, wasn't that always the story nowadays. Guy falls in love and ends up losing her anyway. She sighed looking downwards, how sad. And yet it always seemed to happen.

"Yeah, good friends are worth every second your with them. His friend helped him move forwards to find her, and that he did."

"Really? Where was she?"

"Very far away. Almost worlds away you could say. But he would search the universe if he had to. That was how strong it was. And when, well, when he finally did find her… she was running, towards him. All I really remember is that he held out his hand and like many times before she took it, but at that time, he promised he would never let her go. And to his surprise, she held on right back."

Hitomi felt a tingle run up her spine. Oh it was those kind of stories that always made her feel so funny inside. Just so happy it sent goosebumps over her skin. She smiled again end to end, looking on at him.

"Aah, that is a rather romantic story. Its good to see that you—uh—your friend could truly experience what love is all about."

"Um hum," the friendly stranger looked onwards up to the stars still shining in the sky. Again, he looked as if dazed in his own little world, a world of sadness? She wasn't sure, but Hitomi could feel something of the sort.

"I would've wished for that, but it didn't turn out that way."

"Huh?" Hitomi questioned. What did he mean by that?

"They never did stay together. Eventually this girl had to return home, and you know the saying, when you love something, you gotta let it go."

"Oh…." Hitomi didn't know what to say. How so very depressing! Poor guy had fallen head over heels only to trip backwards! She didn't want to imagine the heartbreak. Some kid, missing a very special girl, wow, that story was very familiar after all.

"Better to have love and lost, then to have never loved at all," Hitomi gave a sympathetic smile.

"Really? Try it."

She stood still for the moment, watching the dark figure before her through the drifting snowflakes. He was quiet now, digginghis foot into the snow bank, looking on down at the white fluff below.

"I'm sorry, its kind of obvious isn't it?"

"Obvious?"

"Yeah, that I'm 'the friend'?"

Hitomi closed her eyes grinning. "Hey, I understand. I am just some stranger after all. Truly, I do feel for you, I do. As long as she's still here with us, there's got to be a part of her that feels the same way."

He turned, smiling back, looking a little better. "Hey thanks, I'd hope so, but its been… well years…"

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder…" Hitomi added, looking the fellow deep in the eyes. "I can't quite recall your name, probably because I've never introduced myself…."

"Oh," he replied sheepishly. "And here I went telling you my life story without even bothering with a name."

"Don't worry," Hitomi laughed. "I do that all the time. Hi, my name's Hitomi Kanzaki…" she stretched out her hand happy to finally get acquainted with the guy.

"H-h-itomi????"

"Yes…." She glanced at him wonderingly. He looked… shocked almost. He just stood there speechless, not even bothering to take her hand, looking to stunned to even think.

He backed up a few steps, looking overwhelmed at the moment. What was wrong? What did she say?

"I-I've got to go now…I just have to…" without another word, he quickly spun around and briskly walked the other way. Hitomi just stood there, now being the one unable to move, arm still extended. What had happened? What was so wrong with her name? Why had he been so surprised? She stood under the dim light, eyes still focused on the disappearing figure walking amongst the shadows. His swift movements guided him through the twinkling park, further past her reach.

A sad feeling took over her, and she stood waiting, looking onwards as the beautiful stranger made off. She stood and waited until she could no longer see his smiling face, slick black hair, tall lean figure. She stood until she was certain he had left beyond her grasp, a mystery in himself.

"Don't go Van…. Please don't go," she softly whispered, moist clouds billowing from her mouth. Well, it was no wonder he had never introduced himself, she had known his name all along.

*~ *~ *

Amano tapped his chin lazily. He was totally absorbed in his new leather recliner… sucked into it's soft depth and seemingly leaving him paralyzed and glued to this moment of eternal relaxation. He lay so far back he could barely make out the television through his feet protruding into view. Oh well…. It was just so comfy and snug…..

He gawked at the cell phone he held in his right hand. Oh that thing. He had been staring at it pointlessly for over an hour now. Well not just staring at it of course.. that would just be weird… he had been playing that blasted 'snake game'. Stupid snake game. He had thought Tetris was the most addictive simple computer game there was… but boy was he mistaken. He finally has a few care-free hours left to himself and 70% of it is gone trying to get a frickin line to catch up with all the little dots that always appeared in the most inconvenient places. Seriously, what a wonderful waste of time. Yet… he still did it. Every time he lost it was 'new game' all over again. One time his phone even died of batteries because of his horrible addiction. And now, here he lay, refusing to ever part from his newfound piece of furniture with that cursed phone and its cursed game.

He sighed exhausted, eyes strained. That stupid line.. or "the snake".. must've been like five centimeters long by now…. which was a good thing when determining points.. but also a bad thing because too much length could kill him… such a hard concept to grasp for such a basic game. He had gotten over his attachment to solitaire, and even minesweeper, and finally puts away that blasted Tetris, when woah be gone another stress-increasing 2-dimensional game comes into play.

This was pathetic. He knew why he was really doing this. He was putting off something elseby doing this. Putting off something he did not want to do where instead he preferred to waste hours of his life catching dots. But that was the way it was.. and he did not plan to do what he had originally planned to do.

"Stop before you confuse yourself," he muttered, figuring it was a little too late for that. His mind again started to debate the issue at hand, what he "had to do". He shut off the game finally contented with it (and partly because his snake had stupidly crashed into itself) and scanned through his list of phone numbers. He gave a quick glance on the dozens of people he had.. skimming right down the alphabet... but looking only for …

Yukari.

There she was. Ha, like he didn't already know her whole number off by heart. It wasn't that hard to stuff seven digits in his mind. He glanced at the teeny screen half inclined to press the call button, half thinking to continue his sort-of-winning streak and kick some snake ass. He narrowed his eyebrows, understanding what he really should do.

"Amano, hi…" Yukari smiled softly, balancing the receiver on her shoulder, glancing at the glowing screen of the call display. "Funny, I've been trying to call you for hours!"

"Ah, you shouldn't have bothered; my computer's been online all day downloading all sorts of medical programs and boring things like that…"

"So I see you're using your cell huh…. tell me, have you finally beat my wonderful record of 720 on that—"

"DON'T EVEN GO THERE…."

"Hahaha.. . what did I tell you about me being invincible?" She tweaked the phone cord around the pencil in her hand, looking around every so often for her cordless. "So, Hitomi's called you yet? She was out early today…"

"She was? No, I haven't spoken to her really…."

"Oh…. I think she went to pick up something…" She bit her lip, figuring it wasn't necessary to tell him Hitomi had paid a visit to her shrink for a few session tapes… Amano would freak if he knew it had been Yukari's idea to drive Hitomi back to that odd mental place.

"Yukari, what am I to do with her?? She's been acting so different lately!" Amano watched the light of the chandelier above him flicker constantly, groaning at the thought of going up there to replace whichever bulb it was.

"Different? Come on Amano, give her a break, its not her fault about the visions…"

"Oh no, it's the not the visions that's bugging me." Amano flipped the recliner back in its straight position sitting properly. "Its just the way she's been acting. Its all too familiar to be comfortable with. Yukari, seriously, she nearly killed me with shock after that whole dream… what kind of dream knocks a person unconscious anyway?"

"Oh Amano," Yukari supported her chin in her hand, thinking over the situation. "I don't know.. I think she's kind of reconnecting with her spiritual sense you know…"

"And that's supposed to be a good thing?! Uh hello? Remember when she used to be a little too superstitious for our liking back then?"

"Superstitious? Amano! She had been through a traumatic time! I think being abducted or kidnapped or whatever from May to the end of August is a little bit overwhelming don't you think?"

"SOOO? Yukari, the girl was like a lunatic back then!!! She scared me! What if that happens again? Why do I have the feeling it probably will? She's been acting that way… you said so yourself."

"Amano.. so what?? Maybe she's a little a quiet now, maybe sometimes a little eccentric.. but—"

"Did you hear that?"

"Huh?" Yukari brushed a bang of reddish hair behind her ear not so adoring being interrupted. "Hear what?"

"Something picked up… like three minutes ago…" Amano listened closely, did he hear that or was it yet another figment of his imagination?

"What? Then why didn't you say anything three minutes ago?? Aren't you on your cell phone? I only have two phones and I'm here by myself…."

"Whatever, same here. Anyway….oh yes.. and Catherine, you know Hitomi's new roommate,showed me Hitomi's old taro cards… I know for a fact you had those… Mrs. Kanzaki had told you to keep them away from her."

"Please! Hitomi's a grown woman," Yukari argued defensively. "She can figure out what she wants to do with them herself!" She picked endlessly at a chipping nail on her left hand, leaning back on her oak desk chair.

"Yukari…. tell me she didn't do a reading."

"What's so wrong with a reading?"

"YUKARI!"

"What?!" She rolled her eyes sticking out her tongue at no one in particular, sort of imagining that Amano was standing right there in front of her.

"Omigosh, I can't believe you made her do a reading. You told her to didn't you?!"

"Well, I thought it might help clear up some of Hitomi's problems okay?? Excuse me for trying to help my best friend unlike some people…."

"Hey I want the best for her too," Amano sighed. "Lord knows I don't need her going psycho again okay? It took her nearly two or three years to fully recover from that experience before and I have been with her through all of it. I don't want to go through that again!"

Yukari closed her eyes momentarily. There was something wrong with Amano's tone. He just wasn't understanding.

"Amano dear.. don't you get it? That's what marriage is all about you know. In sickness and in health…. You should be there for her."

He cringed suddenly, flooded with guilt. He rubbed a finger over the sleek gold of his engagement ring, pitying himself for being so impatient with the girl he cared for.

"Ugh.. I hate it when you're right… I really don't know what's been eating at me lately…" He slicked back his birch brown hair, leaning forwards, holding onto a small silver frame he had picked up off his wall unit. He studied the picture carefully, how he held on to his little Hitomi….. how he embraced her slender arms, rested his chin on her soft amber hair… how he tucked her hands by his…. And yet.. how his eyes kept looking in another direction, that direction a little to the left… his eyes.. so focused on…..

"Oh guy, don't worry bout it so much. Hito will be fine… anywaze…what have you been up to lately? Still studying to be Mr. Doctor right?"

"Um hum…" Amano smiled nodding aimlessly. He continued to pry away at the latches at the back of the frame, earnestly digging in his fingernails tugging to get the backing out. Carefully he dumped out the contents on the seat of the couch next to him, sliding the old photo cautiously off the glass.

"Yukari…." He softly whispered. 'Well I'll be, it was her after all.'

"Yeah?"

"Huh?" Amano jerked his head up suddenly.. remembering the phone cradled by his ear. A rush of pink ran to his cheeks, and he almost instantly flipped the picture over as if hiding a secret he knew he couldn't reveal.

"Uh…….. um…. Look… I think I may need to talk to you Yukari… alone."

"Really?" Yukari sat up, listening. She had been wondering if he would say that… now that he did, she almost felt kind of relieved. "Sure…. I guess I can see you maybe tomorrow.I'll call you… is it about Hito?"

Amano sighed glancing at the picture, "I guess you could say so."

"Huh? What was that? Are you watching a movie Amano?? I can hear trains or something… but I can barely hear you!"

"Trains? I thought that was coming from your place…" Amano furrowed his eyebrows curiously.

"Nooo…. I'm just sitting here.. nothing's on. Are you sure no one's on the other line or something…."

"As a matter of fact…oh shit… now I remember.. I share my cell line wi—"

CLICK.

*~*~*

Hitomi nearly thrust the phone across the seats next to her. If she did that she'd probably end up hitting that funny looking bearded man sitting there. Her mind was dazed with thought.. and filled with embarrassment and regret.

She sat feeling guilty, anxious, horrible whatever it may be. In one hand she grasped her purse tightly, the purse that contained a whole bunch of little knick knacks including three session tapes she had finally hunted down a few hours earlier…and in the other she gripped her cell tightly, finger still clearly on the call button. What had she done?

Eavesdropper – that's what she was. A dirty old sneaking eavesdropper. Why hadn't she just hung up anyway….. why did she just stupidly sit there stupidly eavesdropping stupidly listening on to a private conversation she wasn't a part of. Well… she was sort of a part of it… but still.. that gave her no right.

Her hand continued to tremble, and she instantly buried the phone deep into her jacket pocket, not wishing to see it again, looking outwards at the crowds of people around her… some giving her funny looks.. other's practically asleep in their own drool.

'Well, they're the ones talking about me behind my back!' Hitomi snapped bitterly in her mind thinking of Amano and Yukari. No, she wasn't very proud of herself at the moment, but fact had they _were_ talking about her… saying things she'd rather not have heard. She was angry, but she really didn't know with who. At herself or at them? How could Amano have said those things? She sat huddled in her cold metal seat, blinking away at her watery eyes. Lunatic? _Lunatic_? Did he really used to think she was crazy?? Did he really hate her mental problems that much?? She cringed suddenly as one salty tear made its way downher dry, cold cheek, and images of Amano flooded her mind. It wasn't like she could help the way she was! She couldn't help it dammit!! Sniffling, she turned sideways leaning her forehead on the cool plastic glass next to her. What was going wrong now?

That was it. All she had innocently done was try to call Catherine to tell her she'd be late on the way home. That was it. She hadn't meant to intrude on Amano's life. She wouldn't dare do a thing like that. But then… why did she? Well, it wasn't her idea to share phone lines anyway!! It's not like she had planned any of this! Why would he be talking bad about her to her own best friend anyway?!

Confused. Very confused. She would've never guessed that they would even be talking to each other. She had never figured Amano and Yukari were that close. No, not with the history those two had together. She figured they only got along through her. Apparently not. Apparently Yukari was also the person that Amano confided in. Told all his secret feelings towards Hitomi to. But why?? Why her? Why did he tell _her???_

She fidgeted uneasily in her seat, dying of wonder and feeling horribly upset. How? How could they do this to her? It wasn't fair! If she sat here for millenniums on end she could never find one fault with Amano. Never in her life. She could sit and daze for hours to weeks to months and yet she could still find him as perfectly sweet as ever. Perfect like a flower in a meadow, a flower that had bad-talked her behind her back. Obviously she was still upset about that. Maybe that was his one fault after all. Back-stabber.

Dazed in her clouded mind it took her awhile to notice she had finally reached her stop. The train wheels screeched against the track as it slowed down to a pause. The rusting doors quickly slid open. She balanced herself up from the support poles andstepped on out to the dreary Greenwood platform. Noises floated through her mind and she walked inanely through the dim station, people brushing past caught up in their own world of rush hour. Home. Where was her home anyway… just who could she turn to. Who could she trust? Who? Amano, who held secret feelings against Hitomi? Yukari, who confided against her as well? Cathy, whom she could barely remember her last name? Her mother… who figured Hitomi had lost her mind a few years ago? Or maybe she should just run off with that astounding guy she had delightfully run into…. At this time… she could only wonder who cared for her at all.


	5. Session Tapes

**5. Session Tapes**

**PLAY **

"Hello Ms. Hitomi, you may take a seat right over there. As you probably know, my name's Dr. Teroka, I'll be working with you today. Would you care for some water, something to drink before we start?" 

"Uh… no thank you, I'll be fine." 

**STOP **

Hitomi giggled at the sound of her childish voice. She quickly stopped the first session tape she had just start playing, her stomach now hurting from laughter. 

'Uh… no thank you, I'll be fine' she mimicked, oh what a howl! 15 years old, she sounded like such a dork! All nasaly and yucky…. Ew! 'Gosh I hope I don't sound like that now…' she thought worriedly. Hitomi quickly adjusted the volume to make sure that Cathy wouldn't hear her geeky voice of years before. Then Hitomi just sat, huddled on her bed over the tape player in her room, finger slightly on the fast forward button, then rethinking it and deciding to just listen to where the tape already was. 

**PLAY** (entering past scenes) 

"So… how are you feeling today Hitomi?" Dr. Teroka swiveled around on his black leather chair, fingers tapping his chin fringed by a crown of graying hairs. 

"I'm doing okay, thank you." Hitomi smiled awkwardly aware that she was practically sinking into the patent leather of the long couch she cautiously sat in. If she wasn't careful she would lose an arm in all that cushioning. She quickly noticed a teddy bear key chain dangling from her jacket zipper. She tugged it off gripping it in her hand; something to fiddle with. 

"Good, that's good to hear. Now, I'll just start off, before we say anything major, I'm going to describe this little device over here," pushing his small framed glasses higher up his nose Dr. Teroka leaned across the small desk off to the side to grip a palm sized little device directing it to Hitomi. "Do you know what this is for Hitomi?" 

"Umm… my mother said something about the appointments being recorded." 

"Well, yes, that's right. See, we record each and every session that I am going to have with you, onto these cassettes for future reference and study. Don't try to mind it really, it'll just be sitting there. Don't gotta worry about it recording any embarrassing noises…" 

"Okay…" Hitomi laughed nervously trying to peel her eyes away from the bubbling water dispenser off to the side of the office, stupidly wondering if the tape would record those bubbly sounds as well. "Do we have to listen to them like later or something?" 

"Well, that really depends. If we'll need to, then we'll use them, if not we'll just store them away in your files. Okay, anyway, enough chit chat for the day right? Let's just get down to brass tacks…." Again pushing up those ever-slipping glasses Dr. Teroka carefully brought up a small graying file folder; Hitomi's files. 

"Hitomi, you do sound like you're very mature and can easily handle the situation you have at hand here. I take it you understand why you're here, or do you feel we should go over it?" He pushed the sheets aside and began staring her down the way only doctors can. 

"Well…. Um…." The young Hitomi stammered quickly mind amazed with thoughts. Almost instinctively she began tweaking at the circle frame of the key chain. " I know my mother sent me here. I guess I have a feeling its all because of me being gone for so long. I think…" 

"No, no, don't worry. You're absolutely correct. That is why you're here. We're going to just discuss what happened in all that 'time' so to say that you were gone. Hitomi, you do realize that you're absence for four months and 13 days is quite different? Pretty much scary right?" 

"Yes, I know it was quite a shock and all, but I've been trying to explain it to my mom and she's not quite getting the picture. But that's why I'm here isn't it, I'm going to have to get you to understand what I'm going through, right?" Hitomi dreaded the thought. 

"Ha, the way you make it sound, you have my profession done out a step ahead of me! But you're right, we are going to try to go through this. Don't worry about me being skeptical Hitomi, I've been trained to have an open mind." He leaned far back into his reclining office chair, plastering on that I'm-here-for-you-no-matter-what-crazy-things-you-say look. 

"Are you saying that only because my mother had told you what I told her?" Hitomi couldn't help but frown. 

"Well, Mrs. Kanzaki has reported a few things that you claimed had happened in that period but you know, my job is to help you out, so you are my first priority here." 

"You'll have a hard time believing me," Hitomi sighed. "Everyone does." 

"Aw, well now don't say that. You're entitled to your opinions, everyone is." 

**STOP **

Hitomi stopped the tape suddenly. This was starting to get familiar now, and not in any way funny. This was serious. Just by sitting there and listening she could almost feel the exact same emotions rivet through her as it had that very day. An odd mixing feeling of confusion, fear and the weight of being misunderstood. That voice of Dr. Teroka's seemed to gnaw away at her, making her feel smaller and insignificant. She really didn't know why. The guy was trying to help her, but yet her mind seemed to reject that help more and more. The feeling of being misunderstood was just too strong. She stared hesitantly back at the tape player still unsure of what she wanted to listen to. It would help if she knew what she needed to listen to, but on that she had no clue. Sighing, she quickly fast forwarded for a few seconds, then curiously began listening again. 

**PLAY**

"………… are always like that. Do you feel upset at her?" He could tell he had hit a sensitive topic 

"Of course I'm mad!" Hitomi had to bite her lip to keep her voice down. She couldn't help it! The whole thought got her face flushed. "Yukari's always been there for me since day one, and now when I need her most she won't listen to a word I say. She was more worried about her crush than me! What kind of friend is that? She's just like my mom." Stubbornly Hitomi sat in the depths of that sucking couch and folded her arms angrily. What was she doing? She was overreacting to a memory of her fight with Yukari! But the way this guy just had to analyze everything got her stirred up as well. 

"Oh, I see now. It must be hard to have all your close friends and family being against you on this. I can see the situation here. I'm not going to make any assumptions on your case Hitomi. I just want you to tell me now, those very words you told them. I'm here to listen." He leaned over, finger still tapping, foot now tapping along rhythmically. If he thought that helped, he had another thing coming. 

"Well, I don't see why I should waste your time Dr. Teroka." She nearly spat out the words through her gritted teeth. She really couldn't help it! She just felt mad at the moment. "It's no matter really; you will have a hard time with this, that I can guarantee you." 

"Hmm…. you may say that, but remember Hitomi, I've heard all there is to hear. The many different experiences of a single human being is astounding, and no matter what it is that you went through, I can deal with it and help you through it. Its what I'm trained to do." 

"Thanks, but still, it'll be hard…" He was persistent alright. Now, Hitomi would have to let down her guard. 

"If its hard for you to talk about, lets just start from the beginning. When do you believe this all started, Hitomi?" 

"May 3rd I think, not too long ago." 

"Still quite a while though. It'd be difficult to remember it exactly… but start where you feel comfortable." 

"Well, this is easy. I can't forget a day like that. Its something you don't forget." Hitomi raised her head to face him in the eyes. 'Well, here goes… another retelling of the story no one will believe'. She was getting quite choked up inside. This always happened when she tried to remember all that had happened. 

"Well okay, I had been over at my school, with my best friend as you know, Yukari Uchida. I just remember her being upset about something…. Uh…. Yeah.. now I got it, she was upset because this, um, guy, Amano, well he was moving away to England, which is where he lives now." She glanced down quickly at the little teddy bear she had been fiddling with. Oh the massacre! In all her edginess in the last few minutes of her first session she had practically picked the key chain apart with her nails. It's right ear merely hung on by a thread and even sitting down she could spot its beady button eye lying helplessly on the floor by her foot, where it had fallen after being absent-mindly pulled off. 

"Hmm, let me guess, Amano played an important role in your friend's life?" Nathaniel Teroka placed his over-sized coffee mug onto the desk, tracing its basic line patterns with his index finger. 

Hitomi continued to squirm uneasily. They should be paying her for giving all this information to a complete stranger. "Um, I guess so. He was a good friend of both of ours, but yes, that could be taken on higher levels I guess…" 

"Oh I see…. Well, sorry, go on; didn't mean to interrupt there…" 

"Uh.. okay, um, she was upset, so I spent nearly the whole day trying to figure her out. Finally she just went out and told me that Amano Nekuchi was moving to a small city over in England, and she wanted me to um……… kind of um……… coughs tell him… how I feel….." Her voice trailed now. He didn't expect her to go on now did he? Hitomi felt she had been perfectly clear. So she likes Amano, its not like she was going to just outright say it to the guy. He's a shrink, he'll figure it out. 

"UM HUM! UM HUM! Don't worry, I understand…." He blinked his small blue eyes quickly, sounding kind of edgy, bobbing his head up and down like a sea buoy. "Wow, that is very noble of her, don't you agree? Didn't she feel the same way for Amano as you did?" 

? Hitomi jerked her head up quickly, disregarding her broken teddy friend. "No… at least I don't think so, or I hope not, that would've been very nice of her if its true." 

"Aah, but did you ever wonder why she was so upset about him leaving?" 

? What was he getting at? That Yukari had liked Amano? Or LIKES AMANO? She uses five minutes to tell him a little story and now he's got things figured out better than she does? 

"Well yes I did, but I just figured that she like would miss him or something; I would never have come to think she would miss him in those ways." 

"No, that's true too Hitomi. I shouldn't be making assumptions, but it is something to consider, if its any importance to you now. Well, sorry again, go on." He gave her that good old fake smile. He had also discovered a pen to annoyingly tap against the side of his desk. It was driving on Hitomi's nerves. Did he ALWAYS have to tap on something? She was starting to wonder which one of them really had the 'problems'. 

"It sure is something big to think about…." 'though I don't believe it,' she thought bitterly. "Anyway, we headed back to the school field where we had planned to meet him to say goodbye. And um, I love running, track is my favorite sport, so I came up with this crazy idea. I handed this pendant which I'm going to probably tell you a lot more about later, and it's funny because it manages to keep perfect time." 

She drew her arms back until she could finally feel the cool latches of her necklace at the back of her neck. She carefully slipped it off and passed it on to her psychiatrist. 

"Perfect time eh?" He took it carefully raising it to the window and watched as the sunlight danced through its ruby glass. What a marvel it was. Quite like a hypnotizing device when swung back and forth… 

"Yes it does actually. One second per sequence, never slowing down. Basically he would use it to time me. The idea was that if I could get around the track in I think it was a minute, yes a minute, then he would have to um…. Kiss me." She let out her breath softly. She was starting to get used to this whole 'opening up' thing. Hitomi had just told him that with only feeling a tad bit uncomfortable. Progress. 

"Um hum, I see. Romantic stakes at hand huh?" He nodded on with her still playing with the pendant. 

She watched him laughing dryly, "Yeah, I guess you could say so." 

**STOP**

Hitomi looked curiously at the tape. How on earth was she so forward? She was practically telling the guy her life story! Okay, yeah sure, maybe they were paying him loads of money to listen to her, but still… to tell him about her feelings towards Amano, that was just awkward! Some things should stay personal! And she wasn't liking the input he had given her either. What had he implied by that thing earlier on? That Yukari also had a crush on Amano back at the beginning of high school? That wasn't right! Yes, Yukari, her best friend, and Amano, her fiancé, did have a little so-to-say 'history' back then, but that wasn't until Yukari and her were at least 17 or so. These tapes were two years before that! 

Argh, if she wondered about it any more she'd start thinking about that eavesdropping phone call again which she was still trying to get over. If she thought about that she'd begin rethinking all the little details she had overheard. And if her mind continued to wander she'd begin suspecting things, questioning things and thinking things she'd rather not think. 

She stood stretching her long arms above her head, brushing back waves of mahogany hair falling in her view. She couldn't help but notice how hard she was trying to keep from nodding off. Sleep. Oh that's what she needed. What a day! It was looong enough to begin with. She didn't even want to bother recapping on the events. 

Shoving the tape player off her bed and yawning like mad she climbed under the sheets and noticed yet another thing. She couldn't close her eyes. Her mind was buzzing although her legs already felt unconscious. She was dead tired, but there were sooo many things to think over! She lay there staring upwards and listening to the droning purr of Naria who had appeared out of no where to cuddle by her feet and fall asleep even before she could close her eyes. Even in the dark she could make out the details of the tapes on her night stand as she glanced over in that direction. Oh she was not finished with those tapes just yet. No Siree! First thing tomorrow after work. No doubt about it. The story was just beginning. 


	6. New Worlds

# 6.) New Worlds

"Are you sure it was her? Maybe it wasn't her."

"There was no mistake about it. It _was_ Hitomi. I could recognize her anywhere."

Merle bit her lip doubtfully, turning to spot him lazily inspecting that little black device from the coffee table. She was amazed at how interested Van was with this world. Why did he pay so much attention to it? There he lay now in that relaxing sofa which he had refused to ever get off of since they arrived.

"Lord Van, its been near six years now. How could you possibly be sure it was her? There are millions of people here to choose from you know."

Van furrowed his eyebrows as he began carefully pressing each and every button on the device he had newly discovered. "She took the pendant. She recognized it. Who else would have one of those but her?"

"You gave that woman the pendant!?!" Merle spun around angrily on the computer chair she had also been amused with. "Lord Van! You do know that **anyone** could have claimed that necklace as theirs!! They could have just robbed you of the last item you had left of her! Without that necklace this whole voyage could be meaningless!"

"Merle," Van implied strictly, getting rather stressed out by both Merle and the useless device he held in his hand. "It _was _her. She said her name was Hitomi Kanzaki! Look, don't believe me if you don't want to. I never insisted on dragging you along."

The young cat woman shut up quickly, holding back her anger towards him. But still…. How could Van be so blind? He couldn't just expect any person that he met to instantly be Hitomi Kanzaki. This planet was four times as vast and with almost 60 times the population of Gaea. It was full of weird things, different technology, all sorts of odd cultures and creatures, and he expected toknow which one of them was Hitomi right off the bat?

"…… in the fire. Officials say that the blaze started near 2 pm at the Orkins residence. Since then the fire department has managed to locate some faultywirings that could have set off…"

Merle was hit with a rivet of surprise and turned in question at the giant black box that sat within the wall unit. It was alive! Or something like that. Images flashed on it showing a disastrous fire with flames licking away at a burning home; a voice kept penetrating from it talking about what the pictures were showing. She instantly peeled her eyes away and spotted Van, who was looking back at the television in triumph, proudly clinging onto the remote device which he still held on to in his hand.

"Would you come and look at that Merle, can you believe the amounts of technology they have here?!? It makes you wonder what their guymelefs are like…"

Merle stood unsurely eyeing the television. Never had she seen anything like it. It was like a show or play put on, and it was all controlled. She watched curiously as Van continued to play with the buttons on the device which entirely affected the results displayed on the box. Her tail began to swoosh in all directions as it did when things began to get interesting.

"I saw something like this like before Lord Van," she plopped herself down on the seat next to him. "It's a black device as well over in the eating area. But it only emits sound, but the sound changes when you play with the 'tuning'."

"Oh the radio," Van nodded. "I saw it too. The music here is quite different don't you think?"

Merle smiled. "Different? Tell me, what in those whole place is the same? And don't you think the clothes are funny? Especially what you're wearing!"

Van looked curiously at his business like outfit, dusting it off from a spec of Merle's fur. "And what is wrong with what I'm wearing??"

"Well," Merle laughed. "For starters, what is with those shoes?? They're so shiny I can see myselfin them."

"Oh yeah…" Van bent over inspecting his polished loafers laughing as he spot his eye looking straight back at him. "I never even noticed."

Merle leaped off the couch pressing her face up against the television screen. "This thing is amazing!! I never knew the mystic moon was so different!! Look at it!!" She bounded across the living room quickly brushing back the drapes as the sunlight filtered through and began wrestling with the screen door.

"Look Lord Van, have you ever seen so much snow??"

Her eyes glowed with wonder aslike a young kitten, adoring the view from the hotel balcony. They sure didn't have that much snow over in Gaea. The last time she had seen the white fluff was back when she was around ten or eleven. She also stared in amazement at all the humongous freestanding structures that surrounded her. They were encased in glass and seemed to stretch up higher than her eye could ever see!! Lord Van called them 'skyscrapers', and she thought it was a fitting name. Maybe if she climbed to the top of one she'd be able to touch the clouds…

Down below she saw a fury of automobiles winding through the paved streets. She had been highlyinterested in those since they got here. She could see no horses or oxen in sight! Just those metallic carriages that wheeled around on their own. They didn't fly using floating rocks like up on Gaea, they seemed to get their energy source from elsewhere and remained on the ground. She also noticed that people were everywhere!They walked the streets, through the buildings, in the carriages and everywhere she looked. It was always busy and there was always noise. Even in their own large city of Fanelia she never did see such an array of citizens.

"Lord Van…. How is it like??" She continued to stare stunned, as she had been doing for almost hours straight. She hadn't bothered to play around much with the appliances in the hotel room as Van had, her interest, as an animal, was the outdoors.

"How's what like Merle?" Van gave her a smiling glance as he continued to prod at the remote control in curiosity on how to switch off the blaring television.

"The Mystic Moon!! All those people?? Did they say anything to you? Did you get to ride in one of the metal carriages?" Her eyes glowed with anticipation.

"Well," Van huddled underneath his coat as he joined her to on the balcony giving up on the T.V. "First of all they call them cars, or sometimes buses or trucks. It depends on the automobile. No I haven't ridden one yet but I can't see how they could be much different from a carriage."

"Really? I think they'll go lots faster and ride lots smoother! Look at all the lights they have here Lord Van! Especially in the nighttime!! I wish I could see that park you were talking about. I would love to see even more lights." A tint of a sigh seemed to be coming from Merle, even though she couldn't look more enthusiastic.

"Its wonderful isn't it Lord Van… isn't it."

He gazed out at the busy scenery below, looking at Merle as the soft breeze ruffled her slick red hair and tickled at her long pink ears. She looked happy to be here.. but not _here_. He could tell she wanted to go beyond hotel doors.

"You could say so…" he gave her that warm smile that only Van had, lost adrift in his own thoughts. Poor Merle; he knew she hated being confined to these walls. He could easily sense the longing to explore that Merle always had.

"I wish I could see it." That sad voice came from her, as she leaned against the balcony rail watching some bluebirds on the balcony to the left. Why did she have to look so different? If only she could walk the streets and not be gawked at. She could over in Gaea…. But then again, this wasn't Gaea now was it.

"If it was Hitomi, did she ever recognize you?" She lifted her head just a bit as she tried to think of other things, gazing at the deep blue up above.

"Oh, well, I never really told her my name, she told me hers though." Van caught on to her wish to change the topic moving closer to his little friend.

Merle turned smiling in his direction. "But she did kind of remember youright? If you found her familiar she must've remembered your face as well."

Van glanced out to the sun-filled streets down below. "Merle, I don't think she did." He sighed sullenly dusting the light coat of snow off the railing.

"Well why wouldn't she?" Merle inspected his look carefully. "She couldn't have forgotten!"

Van was silent now, his hair black as night flowing with the soft wind. He glanced down at his clenched fingers tucking them into his sleeves to be shielded from the cold. "It has been near six years like you said."

Merle turned abruptly to Van's surprise. "You MUST be kidding me! If it was her she would've remembered you!!!"

"Merle calm down. Hitomi's been through a lot since we've last met her. You can't expect her to know who I am the first time I see her."

"No," Merle shook her head furiously grasping open the screen door. What was wrong with Van? First he thinks this girl is Hitomi, then he runs off from her, and now he expects Merle to accept the fact that this Hitomi has just forgotten??

"She forgot. That's right Lord Van. She did!! She lied to us, she said she'd always remember!"

Van watched in dismay as his fed up companion ran indoors and almost bolted directly to the door leading to the hallway. "Merle, why on earth are you overreacting about it??"

"Because," she stated in a matter-of-fact tone. "Because then we wasted our time coming here Lord Van!! What would be the point if she doesn't even care anymore?" Upset, the cat girl quickly grabbed a coat much too thin for the weather from the closet.

"Goodbye, I'm finding her myself."

Van's eyes glowed impatience as he looked sternly at her as she wrestled with the front door. "Merle, you are not going anywhere."

"Watch me!"

"MERLE… you can't leave!" He ran up to catch up with her as she finally got the door opened and scrambled down the dim hallway.

"WHY???" She stopped quickly again surprising him, turning and viciously staring back, demanding an answer. "WHY?? Because I'm a cat?? Because I look _different_?????"

"Its not safe," he replied, trying to tone down his voice, trying to get her to simmer down as well. He looked on anxiously, studying her, hoping to God she wouldn't dare leave. "Merle, you don't know this place."

"And neither do you!! I don't care what you say anymore! I'm making my own decisions! I don't need you!!" Angrily, in fit of rage at she wasn't even sure who, she made her way to the elevator, ignoring it she quickly stomped her way down a flight of stairs.

Van looked on helpless as he stood in the empty hotel hallway, leaning himself on the wall feeling drained of everything. He could never catch up with her if he tried. The way Merle got around it would be pointless. All he could do now was pray that she safely returned in this strange world they both didn't know.


	7. Unwanted Behavior

7 7.) Unwanted Behavior

"I hate trains. Whoever invented trains and the whole damned subway system should burn in the fiery flames of hell!!!!"

She was mumbling to herself. No, Hitomi hadn't gone crazy (though she's been accused of that before…), its just the way that people behave after being forced to endure the trials of the subway. No, it wasn't enough that it was pouring rain out there, melting all the snow to slush to just about demolishing her new suede shoes, not only that, but she had to be forced to run down slippery, muddy and wet subway stairs only to miss the train. Stupid cursed train. To top it so sweetly off, the next train to Greenwood wouldn't be arriving for the next forty-five minutes. Oh, but that's not the end of her situation. It only happens to be that she had forgotten her keys in her blasted little desk, and she just happened to realize it four minutes before the next train arrived. You can figure out the rest.

Groaning like the exhausted person she was, she leaned her wet head onto the door of 5B, water dripping from her soaked dirty-brown hair, agonizing at the thought of looking for her keys. She had them. Yep, she had went back and got them and had missed that second train. And now, here she was, with those stupid-ass keys nearly two hours later, wet, hungry, and not exactly pleasant.

The sound of the chain being unlatched from the inside nearly scared her half to death as she quickly backed away.Catherine. She should've thought of that! She didn't need any keys!!! Cathy would've been home to let her in anyway!! ARRRGGGH!!!!

"Oh you poor thing," Her roommate lost all tone in her voice. "Here, let me take your coat," Cathy looked on in pure sympathy at the drenched figure by the doorway.She had never seen Hitomi looking quite so miserable. The woman stood, looking a funny tint of brown from the murky rainwater, shuddering endlessly recovering from the cold. Hitomi was more close to dead than a doornail. Sighing, the small energetic woman lugged Hitomi's heavy and soaked parka to the bathroom tub for drying.

"I'm going to make you some tea Hitomi, ease your nerves a bit huh?" Cathy was all smiles, quickly heading back to the kitchen and sitting the disoriented Hitomi by the dining table.

Hitomi sat there expressionless, peeling her wet hair from sticking on her moist face. She still felt horribly cold, and a tad guilty for making Cathy serve her like this. But in all honesty, she was too brought down to even move. The uncomfortable feel of wet clothing stuck onto her back, the icky feel of soaked socks mushed through her toes, and the strain of a computer monitor ached at her eyes. She did light up though as Catherine sat a cup of green tea and sugar-bread cookies on the table in front of her.

"Oooh, thanks, I really do owe ya now don't I?" Hitomi sipped the warm drink slowly, enjoying every second of being back home. She leaned her head back, falling into the depth of the dining chair. She decided to let time wander, and ignore the session tapes for today. A part of her flourished with curiosity on the secrets those tapes contained; but not today, not now.

"You need it Hito. You're going to catch a cold at this rate," Catherine quickly took a seat across Hitomi, looking at dismay at Hitomi's new and obviously destroyed shoes, leaking brown puddles onto the floor she had just happened to mop.

"Oh… someone has to do something about these slow moving transportation systems huh?" She prodded her eyes back on to her wretched companion. "I couldn't catch a bus with a three ton magnet!"

"Uggh…. I know what you mean!" Hitomi's voice came out all sniffled and sickly, as she groaned and leaned forwards. "It just hurts the mind to think about it." She lay her chin against the cool wooden table, continuing to brush back at those pestering bangs. She could feel almost every muscle in her body accustoming to all the relaxation, soothing their aching selves. If she wasn't careful she'd fall asleep this way.

"I've got _all_ the remedies for a bad day, believe me girl!" Cathy quickly bolted up with a craving to cook some hot chicken soup. She brushed her hair back in a long ponytail, and spotted Hitomi's cell phone lying on the coffee table where Hitomi had left it. "Oh, but before I forget, you forgot your cell here Hito, and you got a call."

Hitomi lazily picked her head up and stared at Cathy's direction. "I did?"

"Um hum. Lady, I do not know how you and Amano plan to have a peaceful dinner with you in that condition."

"What??" Hitomi sat up curiously. She had purposely left the cell phone here, she didn't even want to imagine all the trouble that thing caused. But then again, she hadn't been expecting any calls. "Amano said we're having dinner?"

"Nope," Cathy shook her head plaintively as she organized the kitchen in search of some soup base, every so often looking back out at Hitomi. "It wasn't Amano. It was Mikami's confirming that Amano had reservations for two tonight. I just said you guys were still going if you don't mind."

"Oh…" Hitomi lost her voice in thought, slowly picking herself up to stand at the kitchen doorway. She watched Cathy bustle around the kitchen, talking of things she wasn't quite getting. "That call was probably for Amano then, we share lines."

"Oh that's right, then you should call him, don't want him forgetting your date." Cathy gave Hitomi a little wink, then peeked into the warm pot on the stove, contented to see the water boiling just right. She yanked open the freezer door in search of those frozen peas. By the sound of Hitomi's ail voice she would need the best damn chicken soup ever.

"_Our_ date? He never said anything about going to Mikami's Fine Cuisine." Hitomi leaned her weight against the doorway, mind frazzled. She knew there wasn't any 'dates' between her and Amano tonight. What on earth was Cathy talking about?

"Girl, what is that supposed to mean?" Cathy gave her an odd look as she dumped a package of hard-uncooked noodles into the pot of hot, simmering water. "Mikami's _is_ the most elaborate and romantic restaurant in the whole city!! Personally, I don't even know how you guys possibly managed to get reservations there!!"

"Its Amano," Hitomi sighed, tapping her fingers against the kitchen doorway. "You know, the guy's got all the connections for the next 30 mile radius. But we haven't been there for ages, and I know I haven't been invited for tonight."

Cathy quickly put a lid on the boiling soup pot, and turned to face Hitomi with the same look of puzzlement. "Business meeting I guess?"

"No," Hitomi's tone grew dark, as did her expression. "He's off today and tomorrow, he's supposedly doing in-home studying on his medical practice…"

"Well," Catherine laughed awkwardly. "Let's not rise to conclusions…"

"No," Hitomi shook her head. "Let's." Thoughts started to occur at the back of Hitomi's mind. Mikami's eh? Why would Amano need to go there? There really wasn't any special occasion happening, at least none that she had been informed of. Just what was Amano hiding from her…

Cathy squinted, feeling a little odd. This sure wasn't looking good for Amano at all. She really shouldn't have answered that damn phone, or further yet said anything about answering it. She had just unwillingly got herself involved.

"Well, let's see Cathy. I know for a fact Amano Nekuchi is the only one who can possibly get reservations at that prestige restaurant at this busy time of night. And well, Mikami's… they specialize in buffets right?"

"Yeah, top-notch Chinese Buffet in town." Cathy's face looked absolutely perplexed at Hitomi's pondering image.

"I thought so…" Hitomi clenched her hands quietly behind her back, fingers crushing the helpless sugar-bread biscuit that she had been eating. Aha, she had known it all along. It was exactly what she thought, no doubt about it.

"Funny," She looked downwards, eyeing her bare toes against the linoleum floor, totally making Cathy fidget in uneasiness. "I just can't think of anyone that loves Chinese food more than Yukari Uchida, isn't that funny…"

Cathy uncomfortably wobbled from side to side, guarding her soup, and looking at the apparently wet and upset Hitomi. "Yukari, your friend? Why would Yukari need to speak to Amano?" She could now feel her own nervous lump choking her.

"That's just the thing," Hitomi grinned. "She doesn't."

* * *

"Hey Hitomi? Sup girl?" Yukari closed the blinds as she balanced the cordless in her shoulder.

"Nothing much over here, how about you?"

In all honesty it was Catherine's plan. They had just wanted to find out what Yukari and Amano were up to. Nothing big, no assumptions made, _just wondering_. After all, it _was _the most elaborate and romantic restaurant in all of Aimsa, and fact had it they could have at least told Hitomi they were going, instead of it leading up to this.

"Same here, just watching the rain poor. Its hideous out there." Yukari shut down the Word program on her computer and slowly spun around on her computer chair in dizzying circles. "Have you ever seen bridalgowns.com? The selection is just fabulous, I was just on."

"Oh Yukari, you and your wedding updates," Hitomi smiled tapping her fingers against the drying table rhythmically. "My mother actually likes some of the dresses I do, can you believe it?"

"Ha," Yukari smiled. "A common bond at last."

"Omigosh, I know eh? It must be like a blue moon out tonight or something…. Speaking of blue… I just cannot get a good color for the bridesmaids dresses!"

"Seriously? Whatever happened to pastel pink? I thought it was cute…"

"Oh... but the Barbie thing…"

"Hitomi, don't worry. I highly doubt any of us bridesmaids will end up looking anything like a Barbie doll, I can only wish."

"Ha, maybe not, but everyone, well basically my mom, thinks Lilacs would be good for the ceremony bouquets."

"Ah I see, so now you're thinking lavender right? Lavender's good. Spring colours and all."

"Lavender or pink… maybe I could work them together…. but anyway," Hitomi caught a glance of Cathy signaling to cut to the chase. "You wanna go watch a movie tonight Kari? I hear 'Silent Murder' is supposed to be stocked with suspense, you know I love the freaky stuff!"

"Um," Yukari peered out through the blinds hesitantly. 'Geeze Hitomi, what great timing…' she thought. She hadn't seen a movie in weeks, but today was impossible. "Yeah, that sounds like a wicked movie, but in this weather?"

Hitomi grinned to herself. "Yeah, you're right, this rain sure does suck. I guess it'd be hard to go anywhere won't it?"

"Basically," Yukari nodded, feeling quite relieved and disappointed at the same time.

"Ah hell, pleeeaasee Kari? We can survive a little rain! I've been through more than that today!" Yukari was turning a movie down? That sure wasn't like her. Yukari was the type who'd run through a hurricane to see anyone that even resembled Nicholas Cage. A little rain really wasn't the issue…

"Um…" She glanced around her oddly, thinking of any sort of reasonable excuse.

"Come on! Don't make me drag Amano!! I need someone who'll stay awake through most of it!"

"Oh hehe," Yukari laughed uneasily, quickly glancing at the clock by her kitchen counter. 6:37. Oh drat, there was no way she could work the movie in. "I don't think I can make it Hito."

Hitomi smiled, pressing her hand against the receiver. "We got her."

"Seriously?" Cathy looked on curiously. She had just been sitting there anxiously, hoping it wasn't what they all feared. She didn't know Yukari all that well, but whatever news it was it couldn't be that bad. "Then why are they going to the restaurant…. alone??"

"Hold on, I'll get to that." Hitomi released the receiver, wondering why she had just gotten a sudden pang of guilt. It wasn't shameful to be plotting against Yukari like this was it? Well, its not like she was plotting anything much! She just a wanted a few things answered, that's all. Besides it was Catherine's idea, and it wasn't evil or anything…

"How come? You have plans or something?"

Yukari quickly stopped the spinning chair abruptly, words stuck on her lips, not quite knowing what to spit out. Oh geeze, Hitomi was getting a little intent on this one. Maybe she really wanted to see the movie. But with this short notice it would obviously get in the way of Yukari's other unknown plans. "Well kind of… I um… I have to go to Warden tonight."

"Really???" Hitomi's eyebrows narrowed considerably. Yukari had to go to Warden University? That wasn't what she had expected on hearing.

'Yukari don't do this to me, please don't lie to me'. She figured if her own best friend would just come out with the truth life would be so much easier for the both of them. Besides, now that she knew that Yukari wanted to keep the dinner date so secret, it only made Hitomi _much_ more suspicious.

"Yep, tonight is like an open house kind of thing for the freshmen. I just have to go deliver um, some books to… Trista's dorm." Yukari could feel her palms begin to sweat nervously. Damn, she sure did suck at lying.

"Oh… well, great… I guess 'Silent Murder's gonna have to keep quiet for now huh? Could you hold a sec?"

"Yep sure," Yukari breathed out the most humongous sigh of relief that could possibly fit in a human's lung capacity. Hitomi had gone for it. That was too close! Why of all nights did Hitomi have to invite her for the theatres tonight? She was just dying to see 'Silent Murder'! That was not fair! Yukari could watch the previews seventy times in a row and still be looking forward to it.Anything with someone as brilliant as Nicholas Cage had to be worth seeing…

She looked on out at the miserable weather, aware she had only a few minutes before she 'd have to pop in the shower, get ready, and totally do something behind Hitomi's back. She lay her head on the cool plastic of the phone, nudged between her face and shoulder, still spinning slowly. There was no need for Hitomi to know anyway, what's a little dinner? Nothing big. But even if it were smaller than an ant she couldn't bring herself to say it. And she doubted she ever would.

"Open house at the university???" Catherine shook her head grinning. "Both Yukari and me are on our third year, and the open house for the newcomers shouldn't even interest us. Besides, there isn't an open house tonight so that's that."

"Oh…" There had been a very large part of Hitomi that wished Yukari had been telling the truth about the open-house-at-Warden-University thing. But Cathy confirmed it herself, it was all fake. "Its so **_not_** like Yukari to lie to me like that…. if she can't even bring herself to say the truth I guess it must be something important that _'I' _can't know about."

"Yeah well," Cathy nodded smiling, laying her hand on Hitomi's damp shoulder. "You know very well Amano and Yukari are your two closest friends on this planet; I don't think any of us really need to doubt them."

"You think?" Hitomi looked on up at her smiling too, reminiscing on the wedding, Yukari, grinning with glee with the other purple or pink bridesmaids. Catherine was right. Why did she even doubt her own sister-like best friend anyway? She knew she could always trust her.

"Yeah.. You're right Cath, I really shouldn't be prying into their business anyway." Hitomi loosened her grip on the phone, feeling her nerves lighten a bit.

"Hey Yukari, sorry about that, say we catch the movie on Saturday or something?"

"Oh yeah sure!" Yukari agreed emphatically, glad to not be letting her friend down, relieved to see that Hitomi wasn't pressing on the issue. "You can count on me. Hey Hito, can I call you again tomorrow, I um, should be getting ready for Warden now…"

Hitomi smiled regardless of the Warden thing.

"Sure, I guess I'll talk to you later."

"See you Hitomi."

Hitomi gently hung the phone back on its nestled cradle, and tucked her hands into the soft deep pockets of her bathrobe, every so often picking at the embedded lint. That wasn't as nerve wrecking as she had imagined. She hadn't exactly heard anything she would've regretted. Sure, Yukari may have fibbed a bit, but maybe Hitomi was simply digging too deep.

"Don't let it eat at you," Cathy read her expression of uncertainty. "Those two will be fine. Besides, we're not even sure Amano's even _going _with Yukari. How about we have a little dinner ourselves? It's no Mikami's; but it is the finest chicken soup in all of Aimsa."

"Oh," Hitomi grinned, laughing, picking herself up off the dining room chair. "Of course, why not? Just let me freshen up a little bit, all that rain water sure feels disgusting."

She tiptoed on to the bathroom in her soft padded slippers rubbing her aching neck. Hitomi rested her arms upon the cool counter, glaring at her dim reflection listening to Cathy setting the warm soup bowls onto the dining table. Her face was a little run down with streaks of mascara running down her cheeks where raindrops had sailed. That problem was eased by a refreshing splash of water, perking Hitomi up a bit.

It must have just been the day. It must have just been the whole clutter of things that had picked at her through this whole day and whole evening that made her so anxious over Amano's plans. It really didn't bother her as much as she let on. Maybe it was the trains, or the dreams or the wedding or the session tapes, or something… and all this was just cluttering her mind until she began acting a little drastic. Things were right now. Now, things were calm and cool and fine. It didn't matter where Amano or Yukari were eating dinner tonight, or why they wouldn't discuss their plans, or whatever it was they had discussed on that fateful phone call from before, it really didn't matter. Amano was Amano and Yukari was Yukari, and no matter what it was, it wasn't worth losing them for.

Hitomi sighed feeling a little more fulfilled. She ran a soft brush through her damp and drying hair, bathing herself in the aroma of chicken wafting in from the kitchen. A part of her actually did want to see that movie with Yukari, it had been a while since they just went out and had fun. She would probably drag Cathy along as well; they were getting along great. Things were going along great, weren't they? She promised herself to see Amano tomorrow. It had been a while since she last hugged him, and clinged to him, gazing into those mature and sensitive eyes. Just the thought made her feel a little lost and lonely. She couldn't stand being upset at him. Who cares about the phone call anyway, she could easily let that go, as long as she never let go of Amano.

Yawning she switched off the lights in the small bathroom, about to walk on down following the scent of delicious cooked food. That's when she noticed something peculiar. Very peculiar. She stood there unable to move for a series of seconds. Now **_that wasn't right. _**'Oh dear God….' She thought. What was going on?? Still frozen her eyes remained locked onto a little dangling necklace that lay against the pearl white of the bathroom counter. No. It couldn't be. Her pendant? What?!? Why was it there?! Why!?

Quickly she snatched it off the counter inspecting it closely. Yes, it was hers!! But… but… Hitomi's hands shakily let it drop to the floor, landing onto the soft bathroom carpet. She gazed at it helplessly, its round ruby shape as if mocking her. Why? Why were there **_TWO_** of them??

Hitomi slowly looked down to the bare of her neck, where of course, the _second _pendant lay. The second one. Why was there even a second one?? She fell to her knees, by the one she had found here in the bathroom, looking at the identical counter-parts. Gazing at them. Studying them. She felt almost frightened, and was left speechless. It was uncanny. They were identical. One lay there, on her neck, and the other she had picked up in her hand. There was no way that one of them belonged to Cathy. No way that anyone could possible have the same necklace as hers. To be so similar and exact to the last detail… no way…

Quickly she unlatched the one that she wore upon her and held it up against the light, side by side with its twin. She could barely tell them apart. All she knew was the one she found was in her left hand, and the one she wore in her right. Either than that, differentiating from the two would've been impossible. She moved her hands slightly; watching amazed as both pendants swung…. Slowly… back and forth…. Back and forth.

"One…. Two… three…." She counted along with them, counting with every beat. But both pendants kept right up. Both swung over and over with every second she counted. They mesmerized her with their gracious movement, flowing naturally from one side to the other, in sync with each other, pinkish beams radiating from their unique gems.

She could hear soft violins playing behind her. Cathy must've put on her classical collection while waiting for Hitomi. Really, now wasn't the time to be obsessing over the mystery. Half of her just wanted to get up and get something to eat, put all the weirdness behind her. But she just couldn't bring herself to let the pendants go.

Slowly standing, both necklaces still at hand, she quickly switched off the light again. Hitomi had them both clenched within her fists, and she stared at them through the darkness. Her right hand began to tremble, and she knew why it was so. Slowly, in a spurt of fear she unclenched her fingers of her right hand, shutting her eyes quickly scared to look on. Both hands lay open now, necklace lying within each. Slowly breathing she decided to open her eyes. In the midst of the dark bathroom she could see it. She could see what she thought she would see. There in the reclusive dimness of the room lay two pendants. The one on her right captured her attention. The one on her right drew every breath in Hitomi to a pause. The one on her right sat within her trembling hand and it looked on back at her as it glowed. It glowed, with brilliance. It lay in her hand emitting the warmest little pink light that danced upon her fingers and twinkled in her eyes. It was not her imagination. It was real. So real. This was the pendant _he_ had given her. This was the real one, the authentic one, the one that glowed that same night she met _him_. This was the pendant her grandmother wore and given upon her to keep. This was the pendant that had been missing for five whole years without her knowing. And, it was back at last.

She flicked the light on and latched the genuine necklace back on her neck, feeling at last that it was more than just a necklace. Feeling that feeling about it that she hadn't had in so long. Feeling complete. It glowed back at her, friendly like, as if happy to be back as well, right where it belonged. She dropped the other look-a-like pendant back into the depths of her robe pocket, and went off to finally get some of Cathy's classic chicken soup. It was time to move on now. Things were going along great.

** **

* * *

"Right this way sir…"

She had a distinct scent to her, the waitress that is. Amano couldn't quite touch on exactly what fragrance it was, but he knew he had caught a whiff of it before. He followed her dazed by the waft that floated from her, knowing in a few seconds that Hitomi also had the same perfume. Yes, it was the one that Hitomi had worn that night they went to Sunset Beach and gazed at the soft stars sunken in depths of satin skies for hours on end. He instantly recalled holding her slender arms and listening as she described all the hundreds of astrological patterns that lined the night sky. Wow, that had been almost six months ago… but yet, he just couldn't keep his mind off her.

"Would this be fine?" the small delicate waitress brought him back to earth, stopping by a private candle-lit table, surrounded by bouquets of fresh roses and stunning angel-carved fountains. She drew back one of the velvet-chairs and tugged out her small notebook and a spare ball pen from her apron pocket.

"It's wonderful, thank you," Amano smiled gladly receiving his menu and setting the other one down by the empty seat next to him. "We'll be taking the buffet today Marianne."

"Very well," Marianne Dowes nodded, putting away the pen and paper and looking over in the direction of the buffet tables. "May I suggest the lobster selections for today; also I'm sure the Missus will adore the new steamed Chinese vegetable rolls." Marianne, kindly reached over and handed him the wine menus. "She is a fan of the occasional Mordeau is she not?"

Amano smiled gently, glancing every so often at the overwhelmingly romantic environment. "Oh yes, Hitomi does love the shot of Mordeau, but um, she won't be accompanying me tonight." He smiled anxiously at Marianne's surprised expression.

Marianne nodded understanding, but actually feeling quite astounded herself. She had only been serving Amano and Hitomi since they first started attending Mikami's back a few years ago. But who was she kidding, they didn't always have to come here together. But then again, it _was_ a restaurant for couples…

"Well, just call on me when your company arrives and you need some drinks alright? And starting at nine it will be open bar. Would you like any soup appetizers or anything like that Mr. Nekuchi?"

"Yes Wonton please, thank you Ms. Dowes." Amano nodded and slowly sat as he watched Marianne disappear behind a large cluster of aromatic flowers and candles. He dusted off his dress pants continuing to flatten down a pestering crease around his knee. As he drew his attention upwards, he couldn't get over how much Mikami's had changed over the course of a few months! The whole restaurant seemed to flicker in candlelight, and was bathed in the soft red of roses everywhere. There was a wide assortment of flowers weaving around delicate wooden patterns and floating in crystal vases. He could hear the faint echo of violins and cellos with their ongoing tune… the rough brass sounds trumpeting loudly from a Tenor Saxophone as fingers dazzled their way along the golden keys, drifting his mind away with the rest of the soothing atmosphere. He arched his neck this way and that to try to catch a glimpse of the mini-orchestra somewhere within the large restaurant. He also couldn't help but notice how odd he looked. There in the midst of dozens of other tables all occupied by romanticizing couples engaged in soft whispered discussions was little ole Amano, sitting there alone by his candle lit table, tugging feverishly at the red, satin tablecloth in need of something to do.

He peeled his eyes off his surroundings for a moment to inspect the little napkin swan left on the table by the serviettes. He gazed at the intricate little cloth being, and pondered again on how they did that. Hitomi knew how. She was pretty amazing at Origami, and would often blow up flat pieces of paper into sphere-like cubes, or into a geometrical river bird. The little things she did amazed him so. If she were with him right at the very moment she would have probably collected a vast assortment of cocktail umbrellas and line them up together in all their wondrous colours. He would watch as her small, slender fingers would gently open each umbrella as they extended their fragile miniature segments. Then she would place them down on the table and fold constantly at a napkin until it resembled something like a miniature beach towel, which she placed under the umbrella. If she just happened to find a spare piece of paper lying around, she would somehow manifest it into what looked like a tiny person that would lie on the imaginary towel basting in the shade of the cocktail umbrella.

Amano sighed drawing his head off his hands and watched mesmerized as the candles flickered before him. The wax slowly oozed down the candle side, filling the small silver tin that lay beneath. He was so taken back by the soft glow of the burning flame he almost didn't come to notice two hot steaming bowls of Wonton soup placed right before him.

"Oh thank you Marianne, how quick." He smiled up at her, wondering how long she had been standing there gawking at him stupidly watching candles melt.

"No problem Mr. Nekuchi, would you like something to drink or should I wait until your guest arrives?"

"Never mind, here she is now," Amano stood smiling politely as he finally spotted Yukari slowly weaseling her way around many occupied tables. She gave a small wave placing her umbrella amongst the jacket closet.

"Here let me help you with that," Amano appeared out of nowhere, graciously hanging Yukari's soaked coat. "It's pouring out there huh?"

"Sure is," Yukari sounded almost out of breath. Actually she was. Just as Amano, the newly renovated Mikami's took her aback. She could barely peel her eyes off the luxurious surroundings as Amano dragged her along to their reclusive little table where Marianne still stood.

"Good evening Ms. Uchida, how are you today?" Marianne greeted her with her usual tone of courtesy. She had easily recognized Yukari from a high school reunion both her and Hitomi had attended at Mikami's a few months back.

"I'm doing great! Wow, hello again Marianne! No need for all the politeness, you know you can call me Yukari!" She grinned as she took a seat in one of the comfortable chairs.

"Yes I know, I just forgot your first name that's all!" Marianne joked resting her hand on Yukari's shoulder. They all began to laugh in that odd formal kind of way. Normally Yukari would simply belt out laughing but instead she put on a sweet smile, humble giggle, fingers lightly poised by her lips. Amano noticed her frail attempt on some sort of formality and had to bite his lip hard to keep from belting out laughing himself.

"I'll be back in a few minutes, I'll give you two some time before I get your drinks." Marianne gave a small spin and once again disappeared behind a large vase of crocuses and daffodils.Her mind was frazzled. Yukari Uchida? Now out of all people, that girl was the last she'd expect to see; especially since she _was_ Hitomi's best friend. Did things not work out well between Amano and Hitomi?? 'Oh what a pity,' Marianne thought as she collected empty dishes from the vacant tables nearby. 'Those two looked so cute together.' She could still remember when Amano and Hitomi had dropped by a few months back to announce their engagement. It was strange that it could all end just like that…

"Well," Amano turned his attention back onto his newly arrived company taking his seat by her. "Don't you look different tonight."

"Ha, thanks… I think…" Yukari grinned back at him, dusting off her glamorous silk dress.Amano was right though. She didn't look any bit the same than the usual Yukari. It looked as if she had put aside her usual sneakers and white blouse for a unique combination of a scarlet red gown accenting the amber highlights in her hair. Her appearance went hand in hand with the exquisite atmosphere of the restaurant around her.

"50% off at Laura Petite's, you know those good old sidewalk sales."

"Ha, women, go figure." Amano rolled his eyes dipping a large round spoon into his bowl of soup. "What is that, size 0.1?"

"NO, geeze," Yukari laughed it off, also blowing at the steam flowing from the Wonton. "Size 6, and proud of it. That's hard enough to get to as it is."

"You and Hitomi, I'm telling you guys, the two of you are _scrawny_. I've seen broom handles with more flesh than that." Amano's eyes fell on Yukari's rather slender wrists. "I'm surprised you survive all that wind out there without your arms snapping in half like toothpicks."

"Oh please Mano, like YOU are so perfect. What are you anyway, 130? And THAT isn't underweight to you??"

Amano shrugged carelessly sipping away at the last morsels left in the bowl. "165 if it's any of your concern. At least I've got enough fat to cast a shadow… unlike some people…"

In the midst of bringing a steaming spoonful of soup to her mouth, Yukari's eyes narrowed flashing Amano the evilest look she could master. He withdrew his tasteful comments (for the time being) and eyes wandered towards the tempting buffet trays off to the right knowing better to question the 'look'. He got enough of those from Hitomi.

"You ready for some real grub Kari? I am starved, after all I did have to wait for _you._"

"Okay, I'm coming already," Yukari quickly dabbed away at her lips with a napkin, and cautiously stood up by Amano and sauntered over in the direction of the piles of delicious Chinese food. "

Ooooh…. Would you look at this selection?" she mused. "Dammit, if I wasn't on this diet kick…"

"Diet kick?" Amano couldn't believe his ears as he seized a newly washed plate from the clean china pile. _"DIET KICK? _Did you NOT hear me mentioning the scrawny/anorexic thing from before?? ARE YOU DEAF?"

"Shut up!" She gave his left foot a good stab with her heel. "I AM NOT suffering from any stupid eating disorder, and I've got more flab than you think! Geeze, now I'm trying to convince you that I'm fat?! Do you know how weird that is? Look, I'm just trying to lose some weight before I show up at your very own wedding with blubber overflowing through my bridesmaids gown, alright?"

"Oh ha, that is SO funny. I just got this hilarious mental picture of you with the dress 'two sizes too small'."

Yukari brushed him aside wondering why on earth she even bothers putting up with such an ass. She had a theory about him. Every time Amano was with his associates or around Hitomi, or some other respectful people like that, he acted all superior like; she's seen it before. He's like that nearly 23/7. But of course, he saves at least one hour of his good day to unleash his male genes and become a total and utmost jackass. Why on earth did she bother talking to him?Maybe she did have an eating disorder. Yeah, she has eating issues and the lack of food is starting to get to her head.

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding! I'm just playing Yukari! Talk about your everyday mood swings… it can't be that time of the month again, can it? My gosh, right when Hitomi's done with that here comes Yukari at full steam…" Amano hurriedly tried to catch up balancing a plate of fried chow mein and sweet and sour pork.

"Not helping the situation Amano," Yukari rolled her eyes exhausted by his stupidity, placing a giant slab of mouth-watering lobster on her plate, and adding one to his. It was always reassuring that no matter how annoying he was; he was still paying for the dinner.

"No, its not that time of month, it's a not a damn mood swing, its just putting up with the likes of you. Now go get some more fried rice on that plate, we'll see who's doing the fattening over here."

A few minutes later, Amano reluctantly returned to their table with two roasting plates full of teriyaki, shrimp, ribs, noodles, stir fry, rice, egg rolls and what not (Most of which Yukari had dumped onto his plate for him). Oh wouldn't this be fun, now Yukari was releasing her "womeny" genes, the twisted gene that makes all females of the world irritable, moody, naggy and bossy. She had that look plastered on her face now. That look. How did women do that? It kind of scrunched up their face; eyebrows narrowed, eyes cold. But when he tries to do it, his face ends up resembling some sort of demented baseball glove or something. He could feel his temples throbbing just thinking about it. Yes, it must've been a talent. A motherly thing he was bound to never understand.

"I wonder what poor Hito's up to now…" Yukari sighed setting her plate down pushing the empty Wonton bowl to the side. "Did you know I sacrificed a good night out at the movies just for this?"

"Really? What movie?" Amano glanced up at her carelessly as he picked his way past a bowl of vegetable noodles with a pair of stubborn plastic chopsticks.

"'Silent Murder', it just came out too…"

Amano started fumbling with the sticks and nearly sent them flying across the table. "'SILENT MURDER'? You mean NICOLAS CAGE? Ha! I don't believe it! _YOU _miss your dream boy _Nick _for dinner? Not a chance in hell!"

"Whatever! I'm not lying!" Yukari nearly threw a fit as she insisted against Amano. "Me and Hito could be right there in the Cineplex at this very moment… but noooo… instead I'm here watching you eat."

"You're only watching me eat because you're anorexic and won't eat your own food! Now why on earth would you miss on your 40-years-too-old celebrity crush to come to a dinner with me?"

Yukari tightly gripped her own pair of chopsticks in a threatening manner, an easy weapon if Amano decided to push the envelope on that skinny thing, or even dare to make fun of the one and only, Nicolas Cage. "Man Killed By Eating Utensil"… hey at this rate, it could happen, if not _would_ happen. She brushed her hair back behind her bare shoulders, slowly nibbling at a sizzling egg roll as she amused at the thought.

Catching that 'I'm-secretly-plotting-your-demise-look' in Yukari's eyes, Amano quickly figured it was time to get Yukari off the topic of conversation. He'd better watch what he said to that girl. She had a pretty big impact on his life; little was he aware.If he made one wrong move, she could convince Hitomi to… who knows… not marry him? Or worse? Judging by that sinister look plastered on her face… he really didn't want to know what she had in store.

"Soo… have you ever wondered how a Chinese buffet could wind up to be the most formal restaurant? I mean it's an all-you-can-eat kinda thing, right?" He leaned back sipping slowly on the warm tea he hadn't even noticed Marianne had left on their table.

Yukari sat quietly, chopsticks poised in front of her, noodles dangling with chunks of vegetables occasionally dropping back down to the plate below.

"Have you?" he repeated, feeling nervously intimidated by her silence.

"Sometimes…" she agreed nodding, eyes locked onto the lifeless food in front of her. Maybe all that stuff Amano had been blabbing about was starting to kick in, because even when surrounded by the finest food in the city, she barely felt hungry.

"Hey, didn't you ever say something about coming here for your wedding, Amano? Or were you going to rent a hall?"

"Nope, this is the place," He grinned surveying the restaurant, patting the table proudly. "Great isn't it? The whooole place to ourselves!"

"You're kidding?!" Yukari grew an even smaller interest in her food as she locked onto Amano. "Can you even reserve Mikami's? It is a restaurant after all…" her voice trailed at the sight of Amano's bobbing head.

"Sure, of course! Me and Dave go way back." Amano had that smug look right on his face, a little too overflowing with confidence.

"Dave?" Yukari couldn't help but raise an eyebrow as she continued to watch Amano answer her in-between shoving his face full of chow mein.

"Dave Li Peng, the owner of Mikami's. We used to attend business classes together. Obviously he got further than I did…. But I'm sure Dave wouldn't mind to spare me one day to celebrate in this five-star kinda place."

"My Gosh, Hitomi sure is lucky… damn… Mikami's eh? Wait a minute..." Yukari tapped her chopstick curiously. "Amano, have you even figured out how much it's going to cost per head yet?"

"Per head? Oh my mother has that down, something like $110 at the least per person."

"WHAT?" Yukari exclaimed unbelievably, studying him, then realizing that if he _was _going through with that Mikami's idea, he probably wasn't kidding. "Amano!?"  
She hushed, trying to keep her voice down. "You said that Hitomi and you decided _not_ to take donations from the guests!"

Amano looked at her doubtfulness curiously, as he continued to work his way through a pile of sesame meatballs. "Yeah… we're keeping that. We're not taking donations from our guests, Hitomi finds that horribly rude, and I agree with it pretty much."

"_So how the hell do you plan to pull off $110 per head?" _Yukari leaned over and hissed the words at him, hoping to not embarrass Amano, because chances were he probably knew everyone in the whole restaurant, knowing Amano Nekuchi that is.

He continued to give her back that phased look, not quite getting why she was so concerned about the prices. "Yukari, I'd say 110 is pretty reasonable. It covers the price to rent Mikami's, the dinner, decorations, invitations and the D.J. Not bad if you ask me."

"Not bad!? Have you lost it? Amano, you're inviting near to 200 guests, and at 110 per head… the two of you will go bankrupt!! Never mind the cost of Hitomi's gown, or the bridesmaids!!_ Or the new house you plan to buy?_ You know, I think you could've pulled it off if you guys would just take some friendly donations or something, but you can't depend on your own salary for all this. Think about it!" Yukari's face had nearly drained of color. Hitomi wasn't even touching the whole 'prices' aspect for her wedding. Mrs. Nekuchi, Amano's mother, had promised to take care of everything, since she was an associate for this financial group or something like that. What would happen when Hitomi heard of all this? She'd freak for sure!

"I _have_ thought about it, Kari, or should I say, Ms. Pessimistic. My whole family has! And I know I can pull it off, it's really quite a bargain. Look, my nursing job pays pretty well you know, and I have been saving for this for months, ever since we were engaged. I should get my Ph.D soon, and I can start my own practice soon enough, I've been looking into that. Also, my mother's using her savings on this, she said she would use it on me someday anyway. Terry, you know my brother, says he can cover any extra expenses, and we all know Tomi gets pretty decent pay at her receptional position at CGU, so I'm not concerned at all. As for the house, Leo's my retail salesman, he's been researching some fabulous deals for me, and he already picked one out a few weeks back right by those fancy suburbs near Hitomi's place. Besides, a lot of the people in charge of the services know me pretty well, and don't mind if I go on a loan for like a year or something. It's fine. I promised Hitomi the best wedding money could buy, remember?"

"Oh Amano…" Yukari furrowed her brows as she sat absorbed in thought. In some ways, Amano's plan actually made pretty good sense, but then again it seemed to always backfire in one way or another.

"Your plan sounds so foolish yet so sweet at the same time. Renting this whole restaurant just for the wedding, my gosh. You know, financially, I do hope you pull it off. Romantically, I know you're miles ahead of the game. You're still planning to do those little romantic thingies we talked about now aren't you?"

"Oooh yeah…." Amano nodded, that smug look written all over him once again. Yep, those wedding plans he had cooked up with Yukari were just amazing. A wedding couldn't dabble so much on perfection as his would. She had reminded him one day, of Hitomi's obsession on fairy tale stories. Hitomi would always have those little angel figurines, or unicorns or what not. But her favorite of all fairy tales or Disney tales had always been 'Cinderella'. It couldn't have been more perfect! Nope, it tied together all too well. Right after the glorious wedding reception at the most elaborate cathedral in town, the two would exit the church steps in a flurry of dazzling confetti, greeted by none other than a one of a kind, round and glitter-white carriage, resembling the one in of course, 'Cinderella'. The two finest, whitest horses would be leading the front, walking proudly in the streets, strolling them all along through Gore Park right down until they reached Mikami's Fine Cuisine, where Amano had left off in his trail of creative ideas.

"You are too much. The two of you. I feel blessed just to be part of all this. I can't believe how lucky you are, or how risky you are to do this entire scheme. It makes you wonder what Hitomi will look like when she sees that little carriage thing; she'll have that whole Oh-my-Gosh-I-can't-believe-this-is-happening look going on! It's so sweet!"

Yukari was now beginning to lose herself in the fantasies of the wedding which wasn't even hers to begin with. But she couldn't help getting a little bit carried away. After all, the three of them have only known each other for near to eight years now! Eight whole years together! Never would have she imagined that this day would come, when they'd go beyond tardy bells and science class right down to moving out on their own. It amazed her in so many ways. She couldn't help but plaster on a disappointed face to see Amano's eyes wandering off in another direction, obviously not giving the wedding as much thought as she was. She shook her head slowly sipping on her tea, trying to block out the giddiness from inside… trying not to make it obvious that she was getting a little too energetic about the situation.

"Hey… have you talked to Hitomi about that phone call yet?" Amano's voice cut in and threw the conversation right off topic, his eyes still drifting around the restaurant.

"No," Yukari answered placidly, almost having forgotten about that issue from the night before. "I've talked to her, but she hasn't said anything. Why? Has she told you something?"

"I haven't talked to her lately," Amano replied, sounding kind of out of it, practically jerking his head this way and that to see above the looming vase of petunias.

"Haven't talked to her? Geeze, when _was_ the last time you guys just went out on a date or something? I'm thinking you two seriously should spend more time together, honestly. Am I right Amano?"

Yukari brushed her russet bangs back slightly, somewhat annoyed to find Amano lending his eyes to his surroundings and entirely tuning her out, again. One moment, he puts up a perfectly fine conversation, bringing about topics, defending his opinions, and then _boom_, the second _someone else _starts talking, all of a sudden the man that dropped his spoon at the next table just seems so much more fascinating.

"**_Amano!_**" Yukari snapped, rolling her eyes for the one-too-many times that night as he gave her back that childlike 'what'd I do?' look. Frankly, she was surprised he actually fixated himself on her this time, for at least longer than a half second.

"Amano! There better be a wild group of punk-rock extra-terrestrials with Gillian Anderson on bass guitar and David Duchoveny on drums playing right behind me; because at this rate that would've been the only possible thing much more interesting than what I had to say!" She continued heckling at him sternly, this time not too concerned whether others were within earshot or not, maybe even _wanting_ them to be…

"What??" Amano raised his shoulders defensively. "I _was_ listening to you, but no offense, I would kinda tune you out if the cast of the X-files were playing percussion right behind you, but in this case I just happened to have the talent of doing two things at once: listening to you and watching that freaky kid over there."

Yukari rolled her eyes once again, having a feeling that it wouldn't be long now before they fell right out of their sockets. "Freaky kid? This better be worth it." She yanked herself around on her chair, watching the seam on the edge of her skirt, and glanced over in the direction Amano's eyes were apparently glued on.

She could make out small groups of people hovering around the heated buffet trays, every now and then wandering back to their tables with one full plate, and heading back to the trays to retrieve another. Waiters and waitresses dressed in tops of white and bottoms of black winded around buffet tables, cautiously balancing trays of food on their shoulders for those who had ordered on menu, carefully weaseling around all the feisty buffet customers. The bartender by the bar was lazily making small talk with the two or three single adults that had stopped by for a drink, as they all waited impatiently for open bar to come along, and the real party to begin. Now that she thought about it, to actually see a kid in this place under 18 would probably _be_ kind of freaky.

"I don't get you Amano, I really don't." She shook her head, as she got ready to turn her attention back on her loose-minded companion.

"Wait, Kari, look right over there, see by the place where the little band is playing the piano and stuff? See that kid? He's dressed like an adult, but he's still way too young to try to play that one off."

"Oh my gosh! I see him!" Yukari made a 360º turn to look right in that direction. There she had her eyes fixed on a rather young boy, dressed in suit and tie, but with such eyes of innocent crystal blue that gave away his youth. His small face was crowned with the blondest hair ever, falling down past his eyes and sometimes near to his chin. It was patted down the sides of his face because of the rainwater that had managed to soak through. There he stood, eyeing the buffet tables with a small, empty plate on hand. He wandered slowly, obviously trying not to make himself look too conspicuous. And it was working too, for either than them; no one else seemed to have noticed.

"Isn't that the weirdest thing…" Amano couldn't help but muse.

"I wonder where his parents are…"

"Oh that's not the weird part." Amano had his finger on this situation, and it was obvious he was cooking up something in his mind. "I don't think the kid's here with his parents."

"Ha," Yukari snorted at the idea. "So what, he's got a birthday party here or something? For Pete's sake, _I _can't even get into Mikami's without like a month's reservation! That kid's gotta be here with somebody."

"Yeah? Then tell me why this is like the eighth time I've seen him walk by, alone."

"Oh Amano," Yukari managed to peel herself away to turn back towards him. "Will you let it go? Honestly, you're like a little puppy or something, anything and everything except for what's important fascinates you."

Amano leaned back on his chair, trying not to make it obvious that he was still eyeballing the kid. He didn't even pay much heed to his quickly getting-cold clumps of half-eaten food. "Well, you got to think about it a bit, Kari. The kid's circled that exact same spot around the buffet trays a dozen times now, and _each _time he's come around with an _empty _plate. It has to have already been 15 minutes or so now. No one can look around that long without picking out something, and he always disappears from sight every time a waiter goes by."

"So what are you implying?" Yukari blew softly on her tea, letting herself be entertained by Amano's odd thoughts. "The kid's in here alone?"

"Yup, somehow managed to sneak by and now is trying just to blend in with everyone else."

"And do enlighten me, what on earth would he accomplish by doing that?"

"I'm not sure, there could be a whole variety of things. Maybe he's lost or something, avoiding somebody, or just trying to get some free food. You'd probably have to ask the kid I guess."

Amano raised his head up startled as Yukari noisily placed her chopsticks down onto her plate. "Ask him Mano? Why didn't you say so?" She picked up and folded the napkin on her lap, tucking it underneath her dish.

"Hey, you're not really going to ask the kid are you?" Amano couldn't help but stare at her oddly, not seeing why Yukari was now getting interested when only a few minutes ago she looked as if she was to bat him over the head for even bringing up the topic.

"Well, why not?" Yukari was already up, neatly tucking her chair in. "If it'll get you to focus a bit more on the wedding, then I might as well."

She gave Amano one last look as she winded her way around the groups of dining couples, to the buffet trays only a few steps away. Amano watched from a distance, still jerking himself this way and that to try and get a good view. Sure enough, the young boy was still there, looking inattentively at the selection of food items with his empty plate. The warm tray lights cast a red tint on his lemon yellow hair, making it seem a fiery orange; with that little feature he sure wasn't hard to miss.

Yukari stood motionless one foot poised still on the carpeted dining area, the other resting upon the clean, white linoleum floor of the buffet section. She couldn't help but bring herself to stare at the little innocent child wandering amongst the aisles of food. What was Amano thinking? The kid just looked so adorable! She felt kind of stupid to be there about to accuse a small boy of sneaking into Mikami's. She really didn't believe it too much herself. He was most likely here with parents or something. Actually, up close he looked a little bit older than he had from their seats. At this point, he could've been say around eleven or twelve years old, but surprisingly none the less, still cute as ever. She decided a little small talk couldn't hurt.

Yukari slowly crept over to his turned back, and tapped him lightly on the shoulder. Suddenly, she drew her hand in surprise as he practically leaped in shock. He had a startled expression on his face, as did Yukari. She really didn't expect for the kid to be so much on edge.

"I'm sorry," she soothed, gazing into his perplexed glimmering eyes. "I didn't mean to startle you."

"That's alright," the kid replied, in a voice that actually startled Yukari. Judging by his sound, he must've at least been twelve or so, much older than he looked. She also couldn't help but notice the way he instantly stared downwards, and avoided eye contact to the point where he continued to gawk at the door, the entrance and exit of the restaurant.

"Anyway, hi my name's Yukari, my friend and I couldn't help but um…" Yukari quickly stammered for words, not knowing how to go about saying that Amano and her were suspicious about the kid. "Well we uh, noticed you because you're the… only child we've seen around here in Mikami's lately—"

"Why? Do you work here?" The kid instantly interrupted her clumsy train of words, with a question that only aroused her suspicions even more. Why would he want to know that? Yukari couldn't help but recall Amano saying something about the kid avoiding the waiters or something like that. She glanced at him silently, watching him get more anxious to disappear from her sight. Yukari had a good feeling she wouldn't be able to get much out of this kid if she didn't play along. After all, she was honestly starting to get curious on why on earth the kid was even here.

"Well, um yes, I'm a cocktail waitress for the bar, but I'm off today, having a little dinner date kind of thing. This usually is a restaurant for adults and couples you know. I just, was kind of curious how—"

"I'm here with my parents." Once again he jarred the words mid-sentence of Yukari, answering her question before it was even asked. She furrowed her brows noticing the way he was slowly backing away from her, eyes focused on the direction of the exit. Geeze, what was wrong with this kid? He looked just so endearing a few minutes before and turns out he's some sort of adolescent paranoid. She gave a glance around but saw no one that could be potential parents around the buffet tables, and she doubted anyone would let their child wander around alone for twenty minutes in a prestige restaurant like this.

Yukari couldn't help but give him one of her looks. "Well then, I'm sorry to trouble you, um, I never did catch your name…"

The kid had rudely turned now, heading to the direction of the doors. He paused slightly at the sound of Yukari's last words, and hesitated a moment. "It's Steven, and I'm sorry but I have to go now."

Yukari stood and watched stunned as the kid ran out of the restaurant, dodging all the real waiters that were around, and leaving his empty dish upon the jacket closet. She just couldn't come up with a thought at the moment; that had just been too odd. Everything out of that boy's mouth was nothing but a lie! Well that part was obvious. But she still hadn't really cracked on why he had been lying in the first place, or why he was even there. It boggled her mind too much to even think of such things. Why did she care so much anyway? It was probably just some kid out for a free meal or something.

As she headed back, a small white piece of paper on the ground caught her attention, interrupting her thoughts. It lay crumpled on the floor, of which she noticed it hadn't been there before. The kid, or rather "Steven", must have dropped it. Bending over she inspected it only to see trails of run down ink, most likely from rainwater. The letters were hard to make out, but if she squinted hard enough…

"So what happened?" Amano was all ears as Yukari finally settled in her seat again, with that tiny stained note in her hand. "Where'd he go? What'd he say?"

Yukari peeled her eyes away from the blurry letters on the dirty paper and looked at the eager, anxious Amano sitting across from her. "Well, let's just say our little blond friend, 'Steven', sure has issues. The very second I even came close to asking why he was here, bang, he just bolted right out."

"Bolted right out? He left just like that?"

"Yeah, basically. Cute but weird, aren't they all…. I'm going to have to rule out your free meal theory though."

"My free meal theory?" Amano slouched in thought. "What's wrong with that?Why else would he be here?"

"Mano, if he was here for a free meal, wouldn't he have actually bothered taking some food and oh I don't know, _eating it maybe?_"

"Oh yeah, I guess your right." Amano sunk even further into his chair as he looked onwards to the glass doors of Mikami's, trickling with water droplets from the outside. "Then that doesn't make much sense. He was in here with no company, not here for the food, and acting all suspicious. What could a kid like that be up to?"

"I don't think we will ever figure it out, either that or it's none of our business. But check this out, I think he may have dropped it on his way out." Yukari reached over and handed the crumpled card onto Amano, who eagerly began inspecting it trying to solve a mystery he sort of had begun to create in his own mind.

"What is this? It's all runny, I can barely make it out."

"I know what you mean," Yukari leaned over and squinted as she glanced at the blurry scribbles. "It looks like a name and phone number, or an address probably."

"Yeah I can see by that by the way he wrote it, what'd you say his name was again?"

"Steven, or at least that's what he told me."

"Steven eh…"

Amano's eyes quickly adjusted themselves to the stained ink, as they began seeing forming letters in the jumble of splotches. The address was an absolute hopeless case, disappearing to the edge of the crimpled sheet, but the name was barely legible. It did start with an "s", both first name and last.

"Shed…" Yukari mumbled underneath her breath.

"What'd you say?"

"Shed… I think that's what it says, the first name I mean." She continued staring at it trying to make out what the last name could've been.

"Shed? What kind of name is shed?" Amano looked over the first name again.

"Ha, what kind of name is Amano Nekuchi? Yukari Uchida? For pete's sake, everyone's like that, it's called multi-culturalism Amano… multi-culturalism."

"Pssh," Amano took the advantage of being able to roll his eyes at her for once. "'Culturalism' isn't even a WORD Yukari, geeze. Besides, can't you see that 'i' before the 'e'? I think it says 'Shied', not 'Shed'."

"Yeah whatever, so Steven's really Shied, that dirty little liar. What gets into the heads of kids these days…."

"Yeah, well this kid ain't exactly normal. His name sounds oddly familiar though, or at least his last name."

"What? You can read that?"

"Sure, we've only been gawking at it for about five minutes now, it says Shied Sheizar." Amano tapped the crumpled sheet confidently.

"Oh your right, it does." Yukari lifted it up to the candlelight, glancing at the now visible name. "Well supposing that the name on the sheet is this kid's real name, then I guess our little kooky case was some kid named Shied Sheizar, hey you're right… that name is… oddly familiar…"


	8. Encounter With Shied

8 8.) Encounter With Shied

She huddled helplessly under the soaked murky yellow awning of Gino's Pizza, around West 5th Ave.; quite a walk from Aimsa Ramada Hotel. The thin windbreaker she used was entirely drenched, but pretty useful in protecting her from getting wet. Only her outstretched whiskers dripped droplets of rainwater down to her shivering legs, fur plastered down the sides. She may have escaped most of the torrent of the rain, but the bitter cold held her victim. The sharp winds seeped through her light coat bringing rain and hailstones to sting against her face. 

Merle quickly surveyed the area, relieved to find no one close enough in range to see her; and to see the pizza place entirely closed and empty. Her face, the bright yellow eyes and black tiger-like stripes, lay concealed in the shadow of her navy hood which also hid her long pointed ears and head of rosy pink hair. Her hands, or more likely, her paws, never revealed themselves from her long jacket sleeves, the tufts of fur around her wrists every so often peeking out. But this one little coat didn't save poor Merle from anything. It was still very impossible to **not** notice her. Her thin, trembling legs were hard to miss with their slender stripes and tufts of beige fur near the ankles. Her bottom half was completely naked and vulnerable to anyone who walked by. She had managed so far, for the few hours she had been out, but she was beginning to highly doubt how much longer she could survive in the Mystic Moon on her own; and what was worse, she hadn't even one clue where Hitomi could be. 

Grumbling, Merle headed down the sidewalk stubbornly kicking at a small stone which she had been working on for the last few blocks. She sadly watched it roll countless times over in the muddy puddles, images of Gaea floating in her dismayed mind. She couldn't help but wonder how much longer it would be until she finally got to return home, to a place where she was accepted. It's not like she didn't want to find Hitomi, but she also didn't want to spend forever looking for her. 

From a distance the frustrated Merle looked almost as if normal, like a relentless teenage girl out for a lonely stroll down the deserted streets of the city. But instead, you were faced with a creature of some sort, of species not exactly known, wandering with an only sole purpose to find some girl that will make her best friend happy. Well, in all honesty, Merle wasn't just looking for Hitomi for Van's sake. A strong part of her also wished to meet up with Hitomi again. Sure, they hadn't gotten along greatly beforehand, but things have changed. Merle was no longer the childish little kitten that clung onto Van and claimed him as her own. Over time, her bond between Van grew stronger, but yet, she had also grown more independent. Once Fanelia had been restored a few years back, and many citizens had returned to settle there, Van had been kept rather busy. Obviously, it was time to test how well Van responded to his duties as King. Most days he would be out to discuss dealings with other townships nearby, socializing with the happy peasants of Fanelia, Kayle, Frade, Palas and all of Asturia, or visiting their good friend Allen Scheizar and his family. Often times, Merle would tag along wherever he went. It was pretty routine at first, but eventually she had lost entire interest in trailing him with all of his responsibilities. Instead, Merle helped out at the Castle of Fanelia in Van's absence. Or at other times, when things were fairly quiet and calm, she would sit out back in the midst of the tall, forest trees and continue to clean off the slumbered Escaflowne, by the Fanel memorial graves, which every now and then grew covered in moss and twigs. She could still remember those times Van had maneuvered that machine to be more than it was, into a fierce metallic creature Van had come to be a part of. So in a sense to Merle, whenever she was with Escaflowne, she was with Van. 

"Rrrowww…" 

A small tiny voice alerted Merle's sharp ears, bringing her back from her thoughts and straight into Mystic Moon reality. All of a sudden, a soft pressing body twisted itself around her legs. Merle's face almost lit with glee as she spotted what looked something like her, a thin, striped gray tabby cat glancing back up at her with the exact same gleaming eyes. It sat on all fours, and patted its ash paw against hers. Merle felt a clutching, happy feeling in her chest, as she proudly smiled at the tiny kitten, the only thing yet in this world that had actually welcomed her and made her feel welcome. Instantly she bent over, huddled it within her wet arms, and held the small, breathing and mewing creature close to her. Merle scampered over back to the pizza place a block down and sat in the only dry cement underneath the awning. Even then she could still feel the small rumble of a purr floating from her little, soaked friend. Merle did the same for what she felt was like forever. 

"Hmm, I think he likes you." 

A voice nearly scared the living daylights out of Merle. A voice, a human voice! Her eyes shot open. Her thoughts clamored all at once, her fear practically shrieking to escape. It was an earthling! An earthling had seen her! Instantly she was on her feet, feeling the struggle of the creature within her arms. Merle backed away shaken, not knowing what to think as she absent-mindly dropped the innocent little kitten onto the ground. Already she could feel the fierce pounding of her small heart smacking against the side of her chest. She was urged to run by her mind, the thought of fear and escape ran through her like fiery darts. What held her back? Merle really didn't know. Maybe it was of concern for the little grayish friend she had met, or maybe it was just a case of odd stupidity. 

"Now have you met a new friend there, Casey?" The earthling that had run into her crouched only a few feet away, gently scratching the chin of the tiny kitten which had run over to him after Merle had dropped it. She instantly saw that he was rather young, probably younger than she was. He was merely a child. A child, which was now petting his small, mewing cat under the dry shelter of the awning. Not exactly a nightmarish picture which makes you want to flee the other way. That insisting urge to leave right at that moment was still incessantly scratching at the back of her mind, but it was now starting to get overpowered by curiosity. He continued staying there perched on his knees, cuddling the soft little creature he had with him, Casey. His blonde hair fell almost past his soft eyes, stuck in thick strands from the damp rainwater. He hid underneath one of those bright, yellow raincoats, complete with faded jeans with cut out holes at the knees. His feet lay tucked in worn out Reebok sneakers, everything looking old and dull. His whole outfit tended to make him look younger than he probably was, in which he kind of looked like a little preschooler. Merle guessed him to most likely be a couple of years older than that, judging by the sound of his voice and his height. But what intrigued her most was not the way he looked, but in fact his… well his lack of fear. Here she stood, a creature of which she was sure he had never seen before, and yet he just sat there… petting his cat. It just didn't seem quite normal. Even Hitomi had reacted relatively strangely to her when they had first met. She backed away hesitantly to keep a distance, but couldn't quite draw herself away completely. 

"How long have you been here?" 

At first Merle had figured the boy was referring to Casey as he petted him, but she furrowed her brows in disclosure to notice he was looking straight at her. Why would the kid be talking to her? Merle didn't really feel troubled by him since he seemed to be acting comfortably, but she also felt she couldn't take the risk of being seen by one too many people, even if it was just a kid. 

"What do you mean…" Merle answered dryly, refusing to make eye contact, and looking worriedly to see if anyone else was nearby. 

"You know what it means Merle." 

Okay. 

Now she was scared. 

"Just how do you know my name?!?" Merle was practically leaping backwards now, quickly trying to get away from this odd little boy who talked as if he knew her. She suddenly felt vulnerable, as if she were trapped. Her eyes darted this way and that, looking for an escape route, a path back to the hotel. Why did she even leave? She was in too much danger now. This boy knew who she was. In other words, he knew too much. 

He was slowly pacing himself towards her, a look of pure calmness written on his face. He showed no fear to the cat-girl that stood before him. He looked young, but also knowledgeable. He spoke with reassurance, his voice soothing but firm enough to be heard over the violent patter of the rain. 

"I know your name Merle. And you know mine." 

Merle paused for a second, wondering about his relaxed response. 

She looked closer. 

Something calmed her fears quickly. There was something strongly familiar about the boy after all. Something that reassured her there was no reason to be afraid. She had been able to sense it ever since she had run into him, or he had run into her, but now he was sort of confirming it. She knew him… somehow. Those soft features glowing in the raindrops, bright blue eyes full of dignity and honesty, voice of command and responsibility… sort of in a way like… 

Allen. 

"Oh my gosh, Prince Shied!" The words just fumbled right out of Merle's feline mouth. She really didn't understand her reasoning behind it. She had no clue how on earth Prince Shied Sheizar, the Duchy of Frade, biological son of Allen Sheizar, of whom she hadn't seen for a whole year, would be standing before her on the Mystic Moon. It made absolutely no sense and so much sense all at the same time. Well, Merle didn't really care for hard-core explanations, she was still certain it was Shied. 

And she was right. 

"Merle, friend, it has been so long." He smiled up at her, as he cradled Casey comfortably in his arms. He blinked softly those eyes, much like his father's. It was good to know there was a friend in this world at last. If only Merle and Van had known earlier. 

Merle stepped closer, sheltered once again underneath the awning, softly rubbing her paw against Casey's small, purring face. Shied also stroked him gently, smiling with his little child-like smile. Merle glanced at the young boy, mind blaring with thoughts and questions she felt like spitting out all at once, but still kept in a blazoned silence. She was but kept in awe on how much Shied had changed. It had been only months since she had seen him last, and this was obviously the last place where she'd figure they'd get reacquainted. Merle was very happy though, and relieved that it _was_ Shied. She didn't easily show it, but Merle had been starting to get worried about whether she was lost or not. 

"Shied, why are you here? That is only one of the billion questions that I have to ask you, you know," She wiped away a pestering bang from her eyes, grinning at her new companion, speaking above the noise of the rain. "What about, how the heck did you get here? How did you find me…etc. etc…" 

"You haven't changed a bit, still bloated with questions," Shied laughed handing Casey over to Merle who had been antsy to carry him for a while now. 

"I know this does seem awkward for me to be here, but look, there is something urgent I must tell you, and Van." 

Merle glanced upwards hesitantly, tearing her eyes away from the adorable kitten and back to Shied's perplexed face. She hoped if anything, it wasn't bad news. But it looked like it. 

"Merle, I can't tell you here. We must go somewhere safe. We don't want to take the chance of you being seen." Shied tried his best to reassure her with a smile. "Take Casey with you, he seems to be fond of you." 

Merle continued to stand hesitantly as she watched Shied emerge from the awning and creep down an alleyway. She really didn't feel like going anywhere besides the hotel. Plus, she didn't want to walk around any longer in the spitting rain, and she didn't want to hear of any bad news without Van. 

"Shied wait," Merle scampered over to where he was heading down the murky alley by a rusting fire escape. "Shied, where are you going? Don't leave me wondering like this." 

"You're right, I should tell—" 

"No, wait Shied. How about Van and I meet up with you later? Just tell us where you're going, and I'll come back with him in a few minutes. Just let me go get him, he's at our hotel, it won't take me long." 

Shied shook his head plaintively, "Merle, that's what I had originally planned to do, but I gave up on the idea. I had my address and everything written out for Van, but I lost the card somewhere, and I figured I would just go visit the two of you at your hotel. But since I've run into you here, you might as well come with me." 

"Shied, let me go back to the hotel, please," Merle continued to insist stubbornly. "I can take care of myself, I'm older than you are." 

"And I've been here longer than you have. It is too much of a risk for you to return to the hotel now Merle. The day is just ending, and a lot of people are going back to the hotel right now. You have a greater chance of being seen." 

"Hey, I managed leaving there without one person spotting me," Merle replied confidently. Shied was starting to scare her with all of these warnings. "I can go unnoticed, trust me." 

"Merle, don't take the chance. I don't think finding Hitomi is worth jeopardizing your life for. I've been looking for you and Van. I know where she is." 

"Hitomi?" Merle couldn't help but feel an excitement build in her throat. Why of course, if Shied's been here for a longer period of time than they have, he was probably bound to have already met up with Hitomi. 

"Yes. Merle, come with me. I have a thousand things to tell you. Then when it is dark we'll return to the Ramada Hotel and the two of us will explain to Van what we need to tell him." 

Merle let go of Casey, and petted his soft, silk back. She was still longing to turn back now, and head on to the hotel, but already she could hear traffic building up on the roads. She didn't want to show it to Shied, but she _was_ afraid of being discovered by all of those people. But another thing was she was also afraid of trusting Shied, if he was even Shied at all. 

Casey trotted along to where Shied was, walking along with him as they continued down the alleyway. Merle sighed in frustration. It looked like she lost this one; and so she quickly jogged over to catch up with them. 

The rain had finally eased up a bit, or maybe they had only escaped because of the protection from the giant apartment buildings they were walking in-between. Merle nodded to herself suddenly understanding why Shied would walk her through these creepy areas. It may have been quite desolate, filled with unappealing, ugly green garbage bins, wet and broken down boxes, bottles and loose flyers scattered on the dirty pavement, but then again, it was desolate. Empty. Not one soul in sight; most of the alley windows blocked off by a protective railing like prison bars, or entirely covered by thick boards of wood nailed to the panes. It didn't look like a very safe place to be, but ironically it was the safest place to be in Merle's case. 

* * * 

"I'm sorry, you're not hungry too, now are you Merle?" Shied couldn't help but joke, holding up Casey's cat food bowl filled to the brim with Friskies Tuna flavour cat food. 

Merle only responded with the evil eye, "Very funny. I may look like a cat but I'll eat like a human, thank you very much." She stood uncomfortably still trying to dry herself off with the soft, pink towel Shied had handed her a few minutes ago. 

"I'm kidding Merle, but seriously, if you're hungry I'll go and get you something. Why don't you take a seat anyway? You must be exhausted for how long you've been out." He poked his head out of the fridge as he put the Friskies can back in. He gave Merle an awkward glance as he sat by his at-the-moment-eating-companion, Casey. 

"Merle, are you still wet?"Shied couldn't help but wonder. He hadn't gotten that wet because of his parka, but his clothes had dried off relatively quickly a few minutes ago. He was surprised to see Merle still dripping away like soaked laundry. 

"Hey, why don't you try being entirely coated with fur once in a while? It takes a lot longer for me you know." 

"Oh ha, that's right. I know what you mean; I've bathed Casey enough times in my life. Hold on a second, I'll go get you something." 

Shied returned in moments from his small, apartment bathroom holding onto his mother's hairdryer. "Here, Merle, use this. It should dry you off pretty nice, and keep you warm from this horrible winter-spring Aimsa weather." 

Merle smiled at Shied's concern, and looked confoundedly at the odd white device she held before her. She looked on back down at Shied, who gave her that reassuring look once again. 

"You need help don't you?" 

"Big time." 

Shied, acting like a mother though only eleven years old, sat Merle down on his closed, bathroom toilet. He sat himself down on the porcelain wall of the bathtub, and plugged the hairdryer into the only dry electrical socket. 

Merle noticed that his whole apartment was much smaller than hers and Van's hotel room. Not only that, but it was a dozen times smaller than the grand house that Allen and Milerna lived in back in Palas or there other palace in Kayle. Again, she began wondering how on earth Shied was even here. Did he own this apartment anyway? She remembered climbing up the unstable fire escape to enter in through the side door to the kitchen, and spotting a few items that looked like they belonged to a woman as they got inside. She had seen an assortment of dress shoes and boots quite like Princess Aries would always drag around, and a purse with a make-up kit she remembered Hitomi having so long ago. So Shied wasn't alone here. It was as if he lived with his mother, although she knew for a fact Princess Milerna wasn't here, nor his Aunt Selena or Aunt Aries, and Shied had no other foster mothers, and of course, his biological mother was deceased. Merle tried to focus her mind on other things. She knew all would be explained to her in good time. 

"Wow, how does it do that?" She instantly turned her attention to the blaring hairdryer Shied had just turned on and was now waving across her back. Merle wagged her tail in delight at the soothing, warm air that began drying her in seconds. 

"I really have no idea Merle. Let's just say it does what it does, electricity sure is fascinating now isn't it." Shied couldn't help but smile as he passed the dryer around her neck, and handed her a spare hairbrush. "Here, comb yourself at the same time, I'm sure you know how to use one of those." 

"Ha, that I can do." 

"If you're anything like my mother, your fur should come out with twice as much volume from all this blow drying." He gave her a grin, as he patted down the stripes on her back. 

"Hmm… Shied, speaking of mothers," Merle couldn't help but give in to the topic. He had reminded her anyway, it was now or never. "You have one here don't you? I really don't mean to pry Shied, but this is all too much for me to absorb at once." 

"Hang onto this," Shied passed Merle the hairdryer responding quietly. He gave her a solemn glance and headed out of the tight bathroom. Merle held it against her face, enjoying the warm air splashing against her whiskers. But inside, she was dying of curiosity, and of compassion towards Shied. He talked as if she had struck an emotional chord when talking about mothers. And knowing his history with them, Merle most likely had. It hadn't been long after Hitomi left before the secret about Allen and Princess Marlene of Asturia had finally been told. She couldn't blame Shied. It must've been hard to be an illegitimate son and not even know it until he turned ten. His own fostered father, the Dutch of Frade, had given all parental rights to Allen Sheizar and Princess Milerna just a year ago. Then and only then, did Shied ever find out the truth. That the man, the hero, he looked up to, Allen Sheizar, was actually his born father. Princess Milerna, his newly wed wife, Shied's aunt, was actually not Allen's original lover in Milerna's family. It had been his own mother, Princess Marlene that had been with Allen first and thus of course, Shied's mother. And to add to all that, he also found out that year that his aunt of Allen's side, Selena, was actually once one of Zaibach's most deranged warriors, Dilandau, who had been cruelly experimented with. All of this, just as a mere child, he had to bear. No wonder, Merle had stupidly struck that emotional chord. 

Merle put the hairdryer down, feeling quite guilty after having thought it over. She figured out how to turn the dryer off, and looked up in surprise to see Shied walk in holding onto a small, tarnished, picture frame, and another picture which he held in his hand. 

"I think these will explain it better than I can," Shied handed her the two pictures, and Merle quietly looked them over. In the first, the one without the frame, she saw a very small, boy, a baby, cradled in a soft blanket in the arms of a young woman. Merle noticed instantly, this was a drawing, a professional portrait drawn by an artist who is paid to draw these memorable photos. They were just like the ones made and sold over in Gaea. They didn't have photographic technology, but they did have drawings just like this one filled with wondrous, detailed pastel sketches. Merle turned her attention back onto the woman in the image. She had long, wavy, bright blonde hair, which fell past her waist. Her eyes were a bouncing blue and sometimes an off green, full of happiness and innocence. At the same time, she looked much like Princess Aries, and also like Princess Milerna. Merle had quite a good idea of who it was. 

The other photo, the one in the frame, was a genuine photo, which held its roots in the technology of the Mystic Moon. Merle looked over it fascinated; it was the first time she had seen one up close before. Enraptured in the image was that woman, once again, and once again holding onto a small boy. This time, the boy was much older, eleven years old exactly, and this time without a doubt she knew it was Shied. 

"Is that…" Merle couldn't quite bring herself to say it. Marlene? It couldn't be. Did this mean that Marlene had been alive all this time, on the Mystic Moon? 

"They looked a lot alike, didn't they…" Shied mused, smiling warmly at the framed photo he took back from Merle. 

"Who is she…" Merle was a little confused, and she didn't know how to go about such a sensitive topic. She didn't know how Shied would react to the mentioning of his biological parents. Instead, she avoided staring into his sad little eyes, and continued to look over the drawing she held under the dim 40 watts of the bathroom light bulb. 

"The one you hold there is my real mother." 

"Oh Shied," Merle sighed sympathetically glancing at the drawing of Princess Marlene holding onto Shied as a very young baby. "She was beautiful." 

"She was. She reminds me a lot of Aunt Milerna. Allen says Mother was a wonderful person, and always will be." 

Merle smiled softly, looking back up at him. For the first time, she could realize the situation in Shied's eyes. Merle never knew her mother, or parents for that matter. She had only had Van. Never did she understand the pain in losing parents, and having to meet new ones. It was obvious that Shied still hadn't taken quite a fondness to Allen just yet. Shied always called him "Allen", never once did he say, "father". Why wouldn't he be upset, Allen was his father this whole time, and poor Shied had only found that out just a year ago. 

"But this," Shied continued on with his story, handing her the frame with the more recent photo. "This is my mother now. Not Aunt Milerna or Aunt Selena or my real mother, mind you. Her name is Angela Ferentini, a resident of the Mystic Moon. She owns this apartment. She's the one that's taken me in, took care of me ever since I came here. She works two jobs, cashier at Liquidation World in the daytime, and part-time cleaning lady at the local high school. She drives me to school every single day, and picks me up at exactly the right time. All this just to support the two of us, and Casey I guess. Don't you think that's brave? She didn't have to take me as her responsibility, but she did. If my mother were still alive, she'd be a lot like her." 

"Oh Shied, wow, this woman is quite something. She does resemble Marlene a lot, you know, she has her eyes, and heart." 

"I know. Angela, I call her Mum, does a lot for me. She's really helped me here you know. She's helped me get used to this earthly life. It's not that bad, but it sure is hard for her. Sometimes, I think that she thinks I'm just some eleven-year-old kid who really doesn't understand. But I know. I know all of the problems she had to go through to survive. This is the hard side of town Merle. Life here is a thousand times harder than on Gaea. Even as the Duchy of Frade I didn't have half the responsibilities that are bared down on_ her _each day." 

"What a woman," Merle shook her head in awe, twisting herself around on the toilet seat. 

"Come on to the den Merle, you've got a few things you need to hear." 

Merle walked over and sat her dry, fluffy, self onto Shied's dilapidated sofa.Ideas and thoughts were still freshly running through her mind. It was really interesting to note this Ms. Ferentini. She has obviously played the largest parental role to Shied than any of his four past parents combined.Shied had changed so much. He was so full of passion, so full of wisdom and knowledge of life. It seemed quite a pity that he had to have it so hard, when he was yet so young.

"How did you meet her Shied? How did you get here?" 

"This is where the story gets complicated," Shied handed Merle a few mints he found lying on his coffee table as he sat across from her. "But first, I'd like to know how _you _got _here_." 

"Oh…" Merle furrowed her brows in thought trying to recall all the details. "It was really an experiment kind of thing. We know that Van's entered into the Mystic Moon two times before when he met Hitomi." 

"Van had been using the Escaflowne right?" 

"Correct. But, this time, he wasn't too fond of taking the chance. Last time Van says Escaflowne had more, I don't know, 'magical' potential than it does now. It was the power that had been burned into it by Van and Hitomi." 

"Oh yes, I remember that. The two had strong powers when they were together, right?" 

"Yeah. I don't know how to explain it, or the science behind anything, but that's what everyone figured. Van was convinced it was through the power of Atlantis, but we didn't quite know how to control it. It was a lot harder to create a pillar of light without Hitomi's little 'powers'. I'm not too sure how he did it, but after a few years Van figured something out with that Drag-Energist he has." 

"Using the power of Atlantis?" 

"Exactly. A few days ago, he insisted to try it out. Of course, I protested, but he went and came in one piece. I didn't want him going to this weird place alone, so I came too. Dryden helped us out a lot, he was the one who got us our hotel room, food, clothes and everything." 

"Oh really," Shied couldn't help but grin. "Dryden is quite sly isn't he, loves to take the credit for things, makes you wonder." 

Shied handed a Ramada brochure to Merle, which had been lying by his telephone. "Dryden had already told me you were coming here, he asked me where Hitomi was staying. When he found out it was in the same city I lived in, he asked me to book the two of you at the hotel, and leave you guys some welcoming gifts like clothes, money and such. And so I did. Dryden's the mastermind, I'm merely the voice." 

"I see," Merle flipped through the brochure looking at the pictures of her hotel. "Let me guess, he's the one that got you here." 

"Exactly. That man sure has a lot of concept floating around his brain, but it works to his advantage. Scientifically, he's brilliant. Not only has Dryden figured out how to transport me here, he's also gotten the celestial explanation between Earth, the Mystic Moon, and Gaea all figured out." 

"Wait a minute, let me backtrack here," Merle nestled herself further into the couch. "So if Dryden already got you to 'Earth', before Van and me, then, why didn't he just tell us and let us go the way you did, rather than messing around with the power of Atlantis?" 

"Dryden's method of getting me here, was a one time shot, and not exactly full-proof. Merle, why do you think I'm still here? Why do you think I haven't returned back to Gaea in all this time? I literally got stuck here! Dryden got me here, but was dumbfounded on getting me back. Allen nearly had his throat! The whole operation was kept under wraps until now, when he found out that Van had the ability to transport to and from the Mystic Moon, which meant that I could return with you. That's one of the reasons why it was so important to meet up with the two of you." 

"Wow, ha, sounds like a 'Dryden' plan alright. Backfires but backed up by luck. So let me get something straight, how did you get here Shied?" 

"This is quite an unbelievable story." 

"I've heard my fair share." 

"Well, here on Earth, as you can tell, they are highly advanced with technology than over on Gaea. They've already done a lot of space exploration. One thing that I noticed though, which is very odd, is that you can see Earth from Gaea, but you can't see Gaea from Earth." 

"Yeah! I've noticed that too!" 

"Right. And of course Dryden has to be the first to come up with an explanation. If you ask any scientist or astrologist of Earth they'll tell you without a doubt there's no such planet in such close range as Gaea. But obviously, to us, there is. But why can't the humans figure it out if they're so technically advanced? They've already gotten their whole solar system, the Milky Way, entirely mapped out, and even other neighboring solar systems!" 

"Holy Cow! And they've _never_ even seen Gaea before?! We're so close to them!" 

"I know; it doesn't seem right. But that's when Dryden came up with the theory that we're not as close as we appear. When I traveled here, I came using an actual space ship so to say. Dryden, and many others, for years, have been collecting actual space ship remnants that fly into Gaea from older Earth space shuttles." 

"Oh yeah, I've heard about that. I once saw some metal pieces falling from the sky back in Fanelia."

"Exactly. Those are actually either rocket parts, engines, satellite debris or something that has floated in from Earth's space exploration creations. Dryden has been studying all these pieces. His whole family line has. Over the years him and his group of elite 'smart' people, I guess, have developed their little amateur ship, which was based and developed on the Mystic Moon technology. It was rather small, but very powerful. We also had one advantage Earth didn't. Levee rock as in the ones used for Levee ships, or Acenomophite. Using that rock we could get the ship to break away from Gaea's gravitational pull into the last layers of the atmosphere without having to use up anywhere near as much fuels as the Earth ships. Using this, he could launch me up there, and only need enough fuel to get me across to Earth, which is when Earth's gravitational pull would draw me in. By then the ship would land down on it's own." 

"Yeah right! Shied, that really doesn't sound very safe," Merle couldn't help but giggle at the thought. "I can imagine you now, up there with no oxygen, floating in the middle of nowhere, in this tacky little cardboard excuse of a machine and Dryden sitting back engraving your tombstone, and Allen engraving Dryden's." 

"Haha, that's almost how it played out! It was a one-time kind of thing. I am enormously lucky to just be sitting here in front of you right now." 

"I know! What, did Dryden coat the ship with fifty layers of lead or something just to keep you from burning up in the Earth's atmosphere?" 

"Ugh, don't remind me. We did a lot of tests and things to secure the operation though. You know I wouldn't get in there if I wasn't the least bit insured." 

"But how come your father never heard of this? Or at least he never told us you were planning to visit the Mystic Moon… And anyway, why did you want to visit the Mystic Moon? It wasn't because of Hitomi now was it?" 

"Um, we had our reasons. Let's just say meeting Hitomi was an added bonus." 

Merle gave Shied a skeptical look, "Fine, be so secretive. I'm just happy you didn't die on the way here, knowing the chances with a wild invention like that. By the way, you've actually talked to Hitomi already?!?" 

"No," Shied looked oddly embarrassed. "Funny that I've been here so long and haven't even talked to her yet." 

"Well, why not?" Merle found that odd indeed, here they were on Earth after so much trouble only to meet up with Hitomi. What other purpose was there, Space exploration or something? Shied was awful young to be some sort of amateur astronaut already! 

"I've never really given it much thought until Dryden told me you guys were coming here to find Hitomi. Before, the Mystic Moon was just a dream. I figured you'd need some sort of teleporty thingy like Hitomi to get anywhere. But then we heard of Mystic Moon technology, which advanced ourselves. I've been researching so many things for Dryden already, volumes of things." 

"Researching?" Merle's brow instantly rose. "So you guys really weren't here for Hitomi after all. Well, what could Dryden need to know now? From the Mystic Moon?" 

Shied grinned, recalling Dryden's obsession on learning more about everything about the Mystic Moon. "A thousand things! Space exploration, advanced technology, economies, the public society, the government, human history, religions… he's just sorry he never came down here himself! He talks to me all the time on this little communicator device he also invented, and I've been trying to figure out how to improve his inventions, especially the ship." 

"So you could get back, right?" 

"Yeah, of course, I'm the only one that can possible work on it. Oh I just remembered something, ready for some really boring science stuff?" Shied gave Merle a long eye-roll. "It's what Mickel, Dryden's friend, has nicely dubbed "The Inter-Galactic Co-Relationship Between Gaea and Earth Theorem." 

"Theorem?" Merle's brows were quenched together now in trying to grasp the entire last few things that Shied had been telling her. Obviously, the kid had learned a lot in his short time here. 

"Yes, as I was mentioning that weird 'can't see Gaea from Earth' thing, I just had to point out the theory to you, it's really interesting." 

"Go ahead, enlighten me." 

"As I was saying before, they've got it figured that Earth and Gaea are not as close as they seem.In fact, they are a ton farther than that. Earth and Gaea are actually light years apart!" 

"Light years?" Again, an eyebrow rose, and a whisker frisked. 

"Yes, light years. I'm trying to remember exactly, I think one light year is the length (not time) of 1,000,000,000 miles!" 

"Length? Miles? Shied, help me out here? What's a mile??" 

"Oh… you don't know… well holy crow, how do I explain this? Um, about the same distance you walk to get from…Allen's castle in Kaylee to the gates of Fanelia is I guess around a mile." 

"WOW! That's a mile?!? You mean a _MILLION_ of those make just **_one_** light year? And how many light years away is Gaea from the Mystic Moon?" 

"We have no real official way of measuring anything, but judging about what I've read about solar systems and black holes, maybe about one hundred thousand light years, at the least."

"Oh my." Merle was too stunned for words. "That is FAR." 

"Yeah, I know, it's quite a lot to take in." 

"It makes no sense!" 

"It doesn't?" 

"No! If we were THAT far away from the Mystic Moon, why is it so big and large and visible from Gaea?" 

Shied sighed, "It gets even more complicated there." 

Merle's eyes widened, and she let out a long breath. Shied, the little science guy here, was already frying every little living brain cell in Merle's head. All this information and bits and pieces he was telling her were just mind-boggling. 

"Talk very slowly, and look straight at me," Merle joked, resting herself against the sofa arm to listen better to Shied. 

"Alright, it's what Mickel has nicely dubbed a 'Mirror Window'. But first let me get into black holes a little bit. Black holes are little, (well not little, they are big) sort of holes in space that sort of slowly suck in their surroundings in a circular motion. What happens once one enters into a black hole is unknown." 

"So you're saying there's one of those things between Earth and Gaea? How does a black hole help anything?" 

"Well, there's more to it. Black holes are rumored to suck things in and chop it into billions of tiny atom particles then into nothingness. But it is thought that the hole between Gaea and Earth doesn't really do all that, instead it chops you up into tiny pieces then puts you back together somewhere else nearly hundreds of thousands of light years away." 

"Oh that's gross! Quite 'puzzling', so to say. Anyway, Are you talking like a teleportation kind of thing?" 

"Ha, Exactly! Our hole is not so much a black hole, but more like a teleportation window, which can get you across extreme distances in a matter of seconds because of some warp in space and time. Now you get why it's called a 'window', but the 'mirror' aspect comes into play because you can only see through the window, or hole, from one side." 

"I get it. You can see the Mystic Moon from Gaea, but not the other way around." 

"Precisely. Gaea is behind the mirror and sees right through to the other side. Earth, on the other hand, can only see a reflection of nothingness. It's like we can see them, but they can't see us." 

"You must be kidding me! You're saying that you, me and Van are right now kabajillions of 'miles' away from home, when it only took all of us a matter of minutes or even seconds to get here?" 

"Yup, that's what I'm saying." 

"DO YOU KNOW HOW CRAZY THAT SOUNDS?" Merle was at the moment perched entirely on the sofa arm, her cat like claws embedded into the fabric. Just the thought of being so far from home was making her fur stand on edge. "How are we going to get home?" 

"Well, this is where it gets even better." 

She flashed him a cynical look. "By 'better' you mean 'worse' right?" 

"Oh yeah. We can return back to Gaea the same way you guys got here, but there's one little catch. That porthole, The Mirror Widow, isn't always accessible all year round you know. After years of studying, they've actually figured that the Mirrow Window is only at the right distance to get across for only around four Earth months." 

"Van and I arrived on March 5th, I remember checking the hotel calendar! It was still snowing a lot back then." 

"Right, and now you're edging into spring. Look, the worst part is that the timing varies each year because Earth and Gaea rotate around their separate suns at a different speed and distance. So when the two planets meet up by the Mirror Window it is really at always a varied pattern. When Hitomi came and went, she luckily hit the four months right on the money. She came in May, and left in August. If she had stayed any longer she would've had to stay on Gaea for at least another year or so." 

"Oh this is just dandy, so when did the four months start this year?" 

"Well, think back Merle. Haven't you noticed that the Mystic Moon is only visible during certain times of year? When were you able to see it again?" 

"Um, around seven months ago, Gaea months I guess." 

"That's about three months and two weeks ago over here Merle. Which means Van, you and I can only stay here for two more weeks, unless all of us get trapped here for good, or at least for another year." 

"WHAT?! TWO WEEKS? That's it?!?" 

"Yes, I know. That is what I really needed to tell the two of you! It's urgent that we all go about our business here then get ready to head home. I've missed my chance already, so I've stayed here for an entire year! I'm just really lucky to have found a place to stay in all this time." 

Merle's eyebrows went up in worry. What was she going to do? What was she going to tell Van? 

"What am I going to tell Van?" Merle practically gripped Shied's small arm. "We haven't even found Hitomi yet! We did come here for nothing, didn't we?" 

"Merle, calm down, you'll have to tell him the truth. As King of Fanelia, I'm sure Van needs to return home by now anyway. Look, I'm sure he can still find some time to meet Hitomi—" 

"He claims he already has." 

"Met Hitomi you mean?" 

"Yes! He says that he's already seen her and talked to her, at a park somewhere around town. He sounds really confident, but I don't like to doubt Van." 

"You're doubting him? What makes you think it wasn't Hitomi?" 

"Well, what are the chances it was her with a planet this big? With so many people?!?" 

"Hmm, Aimsa City is pretty big, but I know for a fact she does live here in this city. Trust me, there aren't many 'Hitomi Kanzaki's around, did he say that she said that was her name?" 

"Yeah, he did," Merle continued to glare back in doubt. "But still, even then, there was something not quite right." 

Shied thought about it for a second. In his mind it did sound a lot like Van had run into Hitomi after all. "Like what Merle?" 

"She doesn't…" Merle couldn't help but let out a sigh. "She doesn't remember him." 

"What do you mean by that?" Shied looked up curiously. "She didn't know who he was?" 

"Well, I don't know if stupid old Van actually bothered to tell her his name or not, but still, don't you think Hitomi's bound to remember him anyway? He recognized her, why wouldn't she do the same to him? Besides, she even said she would never forget us!" 

Shied leaned back uneasily, remembering all of the information he had finally bothered to find on Hitomi after finding out that Van and Merle were in search for her. "I've been doing some research again, but this time, I've found out a lot about Ms. Kanzaki." 

"Oh really, just what?" Merle looked on very interested, dusting off the ripping armchairs from her claw marks. "You know something about her? Like where she lives? How she's doing?" 

"Yes, I've just been checking around a few days ago, and I got a lot of interesting information I should mention to Van before he talks with her. She lives pretty far from here, by the Aimsa suburbs, in Meadow Gardens Apartments off Upper Wentworth, by the University. She moved there two years ago, for schooling, but lately she has only enrolled in night classes. Hitomi has pursued a more interesting job over at the CGU Insurance Company." 

"Wow, ha, she sure has grown. How in the heck did you find all this out by the way? Van and I have been struggling enough just to figure out if we were in the right city or not!" 

Shied flashed her another secretive grin, "I have my ways, and my sources. I also happened to pick up another interesting factor. When Hitomi returned to her home from Gaea, nobody believed a word she said." 

"Why? What did she say?" 

"Hitomi was gone for four Earth months, what do you think she'd say? She was trying to explain her adventure to Gaea and everything." 

"And nobody believed her? Poor girl!" 

"I know, it must've been sad. It was so bad that her own mother signed her up with therapy sessions for a couple of years, she was even taken out of class just to make progress." 

"You're kidding me, everyone thought she was crazy?" 

"Yes, sadly enough. I guess it was the tale of Gaea, or the psychic powers or something that was too out of the ordinary. Hitomi has been through a whole lot, mentally. I feel sorry that she had to go through all that, when the whole time we know for a fact that she wasn't making any of it up." 

"So, that's why she's forgotten us, isn't it?" 

"That's what I think too. After all of that treatment she probably has successfully managed to block out the memories she has with us, but you can't blame her. Earth is very different, and not likely to accept the concept that another planet with living beings is so close by when you can't even see it, it's hard to make sense of it all." 

Merle sadly sloped her thin body downward, disappointed to hear the news. She had really been starting to look forward to meeting Hitomi, talking about all that had happened. She had figured she would never see Hitomi again in her life, and now when came the opportunity… this was just too bad. 

"Well, isn't there something we can do? I'm sure if we talk to her a bit she'll come to… she couldn't have forgotten everything!" 

Shied gave a glance at the kitchen clock. "That's something we should discuss with Van around, we should get going." 

He stood stretching slowly, and headed over to fetch his parka from the jacket closet. 

"Where are we going now?" Merle lifted herself up, and headed towards the door beside Shied. 

"To the Ramada of course." 

"The hotel?" 

"Yes," they stepped out into the gloomy hallway as Shied locked the rusty-green door. "Van's got quite the story to hear. I dug up a lot of info on Hitomi, I'll tell you both when we get there. We'd better hurry, each minute is already a minute too late." 


	9. Preparations

9

9.) Preparations

"Will you look at that, not even on the altar yet but she already looks the part." 

Hikoro Kanzaki fastened the last button of several on the back of her daughter's elegant wedding gown. She rested her proud hand on the bride-to-be's shoulder, as they both smiled end to end at the gorgeous reflection in the bedroom mirror. 

"It looks prettier than I expected…" Hitomi could only master those few words, although she had been babbling on and on at the bridal boutique just a few hours earlier. She was totally at a loss in her own self. She had never seen herself, or even imagined herself in a wedding dress before. The whole image was practically incomprehensible. It packed the whole idea of a wedding right in her face at that very moment. It summed up the commitment vows, the years of engagement, and the memories of love. It was also intimidating her, for the moment, the moment when everything would come to be, the moment of truth. It seemed silly to think this all from a dress, but an ordinary dress, it was not. 

"That's only because you're in it honey," Hikoro ruffled her hand affectedly through Hitomi's crisp, long veil. Hikoro was tremendously proud; she couldn't believe time had crept up on her so quickly. She gave Hitomi a small hug, and turned her around to the ever-silent Catherine, who had been anxiously sitting on Hitomi's bed for quite a time, at a giant loss of words, although she had an ear-to-ear smile plastered across her face. 

"Oh Hitomi!" Instantly Catherine bolted up and embraced her roommate with arms of happiness. "It is sooo perfect for you! I think the two of you have made a tremendous decision on this one!" 

Hikoro smiled, "Not that it was easy. Hitomi was torn for hours between this other one, which I say was way to short for any wedding dress." 

"Mom, they don't always have to tread for another billion miles behind me you know!" Hitomi argued defensively, although secretly she did prefer the one she was wearing, the one her mother had chosen for her. 

"Whatever you say, but I' m the one who paid now aren't I?" 

Hitomi grinned, "Yes, I know. And I'm thankful, now shouldn't we put it away before it gets ruined?" 

Hikoro smirked and gave a sideways glance towards Cathy. 

"Oh okay," she whispered. "I should be getting going anyway. Three more weeks Hitomi," Hikoro held up her right hand with three fingers extended. "You and Amano behave 'til then okay?" 

Despite Cathy's giggling in the background, Hitomi rolled her eyes, "Please mother, enough with the theatrics, we'll behave." 

"You watch her," Hikoro winked as Cathy and her burst out laughing. 

Hitomi flashed a fake smile and guided her mother out the front door, the long tail of white trailing behind her. 

"Don't forget to call Timothy and Alexandra to see if they got your invitations." 

"I won't, don't worry. See you mom." 

Hitomi securely locked up then leaned against the door and sighed in relief, "Whew, she is a handful! I can't believe how long she's been going on about this 'behaving' thing." 

"Ah, Hitomi, you knew it would come, besides, it's cute. Who are Tim and Alex?" 

"Oh, those are my cousins over in Poland. They plan to fly over here for the wedding, isn't that nice of them?" Hitomi smiled at Cathy as they carefully headed back toward Hitomi's room. 

"Wow, what a long way, that is very kind. What is your background anyway Tomi? You aren't fully Japanese are you?" Catherine couldn't help but wonder. Hitomi obviously had a Japanese name, and her mother looked like she was from Japan. She thought about it a little bit more as she plopped herself comfortably on Hitomi's bed. 

"Well," Hitomi mused as she adjusted her crown of flowers by the bedroom mirror trying to think of all her heritage details. "Um, my mother is Japanese, and I was born here, just like Amano and Yukari. That's why we all have Japanese backgrounds somewhere. But my father is Polish, so I have plenty of Polish and English background as well. Amano does too, he's lived there for a few years." 

"That's neat," Cathy nodded, picking herself up to stare at Hitomi's reflection. She started to wonder once again about the whereabouts of Hitomi's dad, but since Hitomi didn't speak of it often, Cathy decided not to bring it up. There was no need to be such a nosy roommate. "So, you guys have all lived in Aimsa since birth?" 

"Yep," Hitomi sighed, shifting endlessly from the uncomfortable under wire. "I lived in a house not too far from here growing up, my mother still lives there. Amano and I have been thinking about going abroad though, you know, once we're settled and everything, and we're done with school and stuff. America sounds nice… or Canada, and then there's Australia too. What about you Cathy? Where did you move here from?" 

"Mexico," Cathy replied, brushing more hair back as she thought happily of her old home. She had only moved recently, yet she already missed Chihuahua very much. She could already imagine John-John, her little ten-year-old brother, endlessly chasing the goats and cattle on their grandparents' ranch amidst the northern deserts. Then there was funny cousin Hertu, about her age, always out washing his car shirtless, in tight jeans and an oversized sombrero, picking up 'imaginary women', as Cathy liked to say. 

"Oh, that's right. I could kind of tell you had some Latin features," Hitomi zapped her back to present time. 

"Thanks, I really loved it there. Though my whole family are _Mesitzos_, or in other words of both Spanish and Native American descent. I would've gladly lived my whole life in Chihuahua if I could, but Japan was too tempting, Warden University being so advanced in Aerial and Aeronautic technology and all. Besides, Aimsa's great, it's very multicultural." 

Hitomi continued to dust out and re-fluff her skirt, and then looked to Cathy with an impressed smile. "Wow, that must be great! Yukari's always tells me of all the top graduates that come from Warden. Many of them get drafted by either NASA or InGenten flight academies all across Japan, you know. Is that what you're interested in?" 

"Exactly it," Cathy looked over at Hitomi, who was holding onto a bouquet of plastic flowers from her bedroom vase and treading in front of her full-length reflection. "There's an InGenten Academy in both Sapporo and Tokyo I'll be checking them out some time. What about you? Aren't you taking night classes at Warden?" 

"Yep, but that's only a few times here and there in accounting. I'm not too sure what I'm ever going to pursue, I know I should look up something soon." 

Catherine grinned, "It must be nice to know Amano can take care of ya." 

Hitomi sat herself down smiling, "Yep, that's incredibly convenient, but I'll take classes probably after we're already settled. I wish I had the patience to pursue something exciting though, like you and Yukari, she's always had that fascination with flying planes and looks like you're the same. Oh I almost forgot; there's a reason my mom had left so early." 

"Why is that?" Cathy looked up curiously, jostled by the subject change, and forever noticing the mirror Hitomi had been looking at. Those hair-spray specks sure did need a good Windex wipe-off. 

"You stay right here," Hitomi brought herself out of the train of business thoughts, then excitedly flurried out of the room, nothing but a blur of white. Catherine would love her surprise, it had nothing to do with what they were talking about, it was a last minute thing, but she was sure Cathy wouldn't turn it down. Besides, it was really urgent. Hitomi didn't know whom else she could turn to in such short notice. 

Trudging to the living room, Hitomi frowned as she spotted the immense wall unit sitting where it was, scolding herself for not changing out of the dress first before mentioning the surprise. Did she ever bring up how hard it was to hide something from Cathy? Well, it was hard, extremely hard. Hitomi didn't hide anything much from Catherine, so Cathy was permitted to clean anywhere she liked. So sometimes, that made it hard to keep some things under wraps. Thankfully, Cathy never seemed to have noticed the closet tucked inconveniently behind the wall unit. Hitomi absolutely detested that thing. When she had moved in, it just sat there, embedded in the middle of the living room wall. Frustrated with what to do with it, Hitomi finally gave in to her mother's advice and blocked off the useless closet with the massive wooden wall entertainment system. For a year now it had just been sitting there entirely empty and beyond view collecting nothing but cobwebs. Then one day, not too long ago, Amano had come over when Catherine was out, to help her move the monstrous unit-thing and hide the surprise where it could not be found. And now here Hitomi stood, in her precious wedding gown, absolutely helpless. 

"Hey Tomi, why did you decide to pick up your gown so early anyway?" Catherine poked her head out the bedroom doorway, ignoring Hitomi's command to stay put. 

Hitomi glanced back with a look of despair, "I just wanted to make sure it was safe here at home rather than at the boutique where someone else could buy it, who knows, but um…" 

She gave a fleeting look back at the sturdy unit, then a shimmering thought came to mind, "I should probably get out of this thing though before I ruin it. Hey Cathy, I think I saw that scrunchie hair-thing you were looking for behind the television, you can go give it a look." 

Hitomi tiptoed her way back to the bedroom, careful not to fall back on her own white tail of fluff. She couldn't help but grin; she knew this was the best way to get Cathy to discover the surprise for herself. In search for that scrunchie, Catherine would peek behind the unit, discover the mess, and the closet, then beg for Hitomi's help to move the unit out of the way; by then Hitomi would be changed and ready to aid her. 

"What about that reason you wanted to tell me?" Catherine looked back on at the departed Hitomi obviously not catching the drift. "And uh, about that scrunchie, I've already found it, I'm wearing it right now!" 

Hitomi's face turned a funny reddish tint even underneath the screen of her veil. Looks like her short-lived master plan had died out sooner than expected. 'Well, good going, what now Hitomi?' 

"Oh Catherine Corain, just go check it out! I promise you won't be disappointed." 

Cathy smiled amused, "Oh I get it now, the treasure's hidden behind the wall unit, and I'm dying of anticipation, right?" 

Hitomi gave a roll of the eye, and then shut her bedroom door as she carefully removed her delicate gown and dressed back into her usual Warden University sweatshirt and jogging pants. Hitomi was busily tucking the gown back into its protective plastic covering when she heard a shrill scream piercing from the living room. 

"HIIITTOOOOMMIII!!!!" Cathy let out a scream of disbelief as she squeezed the newly discovered, plastic protected, bridesmaid's gown in her arms. The pastel pink trim peeked out from the edge of the black plastic seal. "YOU MUST BE KIDDING!! THIS IS THE **BEST** SURPRISE EVER!!!" 

Cathy couldn't quite believe it! Was it real? Was Hitomi joking? Cathy knew for a fact this was _definitely_ one of Hitomi's bridesmaid's gowns, she had even looked it over in the catalogue with her. It was! It was! It was! Hikoro had left so Hitomi could show Cathy the surprise! Oh it was wonderful! They had been living together for about a month and a half, which wasn't all that long, even more reason to be surprised about her surprise. 

As for Hitomi, she simply stood by her open doorway, entirely frozen, and jaw dragging on the floor. She couldn't quite believe her eyes as well. Right before her was the gigantic wall unit, moved a whole foot and a few inches over, to create a large enough leeway to the hidden closet. That was a HUGE wall unit. Hitomi's startled eyes moved themselves over to spot Catherine looking back at her with an expression of pure exhilaration, apparently still gushing over her present. But Cathy was so small!! Hitomi was barely listening to whatever the girl was saying as she tried to even grasp the energy and strength Catherine obviously had. 

"Hito!! I can't believe it! Are you sure? Me?" 

Catherine snapped Hitomi back to the situation. Hitomi's face lit up gleefully, as she rushed over and helped Cathy remove the protective casing of the dress. 

"Of course I'm sure Cathy!" she proudly held the dress against Cathy's shoulders; perfect fit. "Oh, you'll look stunning in this Cath, I can't wait!" 

"But what happened?" Cathy was still in the state of disbelief. She thought it would've been fun to be a bridesmaid at Hitomi's wedding since she never did get the opportunity growing up with brothers, but it still didn't seem likely. She was pretty certain many of the wedding details like bridesmaids had been planned out long before Cathy even met Hitomi. And to top that, Cathy was pretty sure she could recall Hitomi telling her who the bridesmaids were already once before. 

"Oh, it's a long story," Hitomi waved it off with a flick of her wrist. "You already know that Kari's still up for bridesmaid, and my cousin, San, in Osaka can still fly in—" 

"Which leaves your second cousin from Poland right?" Cathy quipped, feeling she was pretty certain of it. 

"Yep," Hitomi smiled smugly at Cathy's superb memory. "That's Lisa, she's Polish, but she lives in Australia actually, somewhere near Sydney, but anyway there's been a family emergency on her husband's side. She had to cut out at a pretty nasty time for Amano and me, so… you're free aren't ya?" 

"My gosh, Hitomi," Catherine rolled her eyes, carefully rewrapping the dress. "You know even if I wasn't a bridesmaid I'd still be sitting in second row. This is so great! It's my first time too!" 

Cathy gave Hitomi an appreciative hug. "I owe you lots! Hold on, I'm just going to go call my aunt okay? She's always wanted me to be a bridesmaid (well more like a bride, but this is the best so far); I don't think she's ever seen me dressed up! And she only lives a block from here, I guess she could stop by some time, she'll be thrilled!" 

Hitomi smiled contented as she watched Catherine disappear behind the kitchen walls. She walked back to her room listening to Cathy's excited Spanish yelps as she explained the details to her aunt. Hitomi yawned exhausted, finally feeling the tire of a day's of wedding work. What else was there to worry about? Cathy was covered, which meant all the bridesmaids were good for the go. San would be flying in in about a week, then she would bunker over at Hitomi's mothers' home until the wedding. Yukari was just as available as Cathy, and the groom's side was Amano's worry. The best man was his 28 year-old brother Terry, who was only a half-hour drive or so away. The ring bearer was little seven-year-old Joey, son of Melinda Mayo, and his six-year-old sister, Grace, was to be their flower girl. Hitomi also was pretty sure her mother already had her specially- made Kimono ready from the boutique, seeing as she was the Maid of Honor. 

Shutting her eyes, Hitomi plopped herself on her bed, realizing things were going by her so quickly. Three weeks… Three weeks! It seemed to her an eternity and a second at the same time. Being engaged for so long didn't even prepare her for all this. Mentally, it was strangely a lot to handle, even if she did know Amano for so many years. There were so many details to worry about, every little element had to be precise. She didn't know what to make of it if one flaw were to just arise out of nowhere. So far it looked like all the invitations had made it to their desired locations, and her and Amano combined had already gotten about 80 or so positive responses. She was prepared for a clutter of guests. 

Hitomi turned her head in the direction of her dresser, where picture frames of friends and family stood. Hitomi was pretty sure she could count all of the guests she herself had invited. There was of course, automatically her mother and the bridesmaids; all of her local aunts, uncles and cousins, then there was Eric Knight, Sophie Glenn, Fuy Aritaka, Katie Dolan and her fiancé, Tanti Leyon, and Gary Tait from her office, Jenna Mark, Hinsan Kisoma, Jamie Peloutte, Jean DiLeon, and Pr. Derek Yarens from night school; then of course there was Peter and Lina from driving school, Dr. Friedrich and her dentist, Dr. Lindsay Bowlan, her new and old neighbors, the Mayo family and many others, and then Alexandra and Tim who were flying in two days before the wedding, not to mention that their immediate families were invited as well. Hitomi had a hard time keeping track of them all without her official guest list at hand, but of course Hitomi's list was minuscule compared to Amano's. Other than the ones Hitomi had figured, she still had maybe five or six other guests from high school and other things also coming. Amano on the other hand, had more than quadruple the amount of people than Hitomi. Practically everyone in Amano's family was coming from nearby or England or everywhere, brothers, sisters, aunts and uncles and all, which could be half the congregation in itself, then of course dozens of Amano's med-school and previous high school classmates, and then the numerous amounts of people around Aimsa that Amano strangely 'just knew' for some reason or other. Hitomi was counting on meeting many new faces that day. She did a mental calculation in her head, reasoning it to be just a little over three weeks, about 25 more days to go until her wedding. Sunday May the fifth, it was a day going down in Hitomi's history. 

She turned uneasily, frightened yet excited by the idea. Yawning, she started to feel a heavy, drooping weight against her eyes, also the strain of keeping them open, and the bother of thinking of too many details. She rested herself more snugly in the caress of her bed, listening to Catherine's soft chatting drifting from the dining room now, slowly easing into a blur of words. The back of Hitomi's mind was still on going with thoughts of decorations, church schedules, restaurant reservations and so on… but gradually those worries were fading as well. Somewhere drifting in her dozing mind were more thoughts on things she had forgotten about over time, and had slowly start to recall. Yukari and Amano's strange behavior crossed her mind a few times, though she had willingly put away all the details. Every now and then she would also remember that person she met near the beginning of March, that longing infatuation that edged at her mind every so often. And what about those visions? She was beginning to succeed in ignoring them, and all those eerie premonitions from before. She never had a day vision again, but her dreams during the night were now beginning to disturb her. She dreamt of many things so far, some strange (usually with background music oddly enough) with scenes of her wrapped in a blinding light, and moving upwards at a very rapid speed. There was also one that came intensely, much more often than any others, and the one she usually remembered once she awoke. It was kind of weird, it felt as if Hitomi was falling, off some cliff, or into a crevasse in the ground, and above her was this strange figure, always getting closer and closer, with a shadowed image. All Hitomi could ever see were wings, large wings that stretched out into the blinding light. She could also make out the gloved hand, outstretched towards her, looking for her grasp. Hitomi never did finish the dream; it would always end as soon as morning came, but nonetheless she found it intriguing. 

Barely finding the energy to yawn once more, Hitomi turned over the last time as she finally felt Naria settle comfortably by her side, appearing out of nowhere once again, as Hitomi's arm found it's way to lazily droop over the furry body of white. Mesmerized by the rumbles of purr floating from her friend, Hitomi drifted off into another world, another dream she couldn't understand… just yet. 

* * * 

"_'All You Need to Know About Physics'_…" Van carefully juggled the massive hardcover book in his hands, as he slowly flipped through it. "My gosh, I would hope this is ALL you'd need to know on physics, it's already enough!" 

Shied cupped his hand over his eyes to block out the bright sky light and smile back at Van. "You should have a good look-see through those King Van, I'm sure you'll find them fascinating as well. Science and mathematics can be expanded so thoroughly, Dryden will love it." 

"There's no doubt about that," Van heaved the large book and three others into one of Shied's many boxes. Boxes that Shied was planning to bring along to Gaea at Dryden's request, full of usually books, devices, magazines, music, and many interesting things that Shied had managed to scrounge up at garage sales, thrift stores, and used-bookmobiles. Shied was also blessed to have Angela who would constantly supply him with interesting artifacts she purchased from Liquidation World, and clothing for his visiting friends. 

"Are Earthlings really that much smarter?" Van couldn't help but inquire, as he studied a book labeled "Trigonometry and Calculus" with a forlorn expression written upon his face. "There seems to be a lot of thinking that goes behind everything they do." 

"Yes, it does seem that way. But no matter how you think it, they're just as human as you or I. I feel the only reason they are so advanced is because they've been evolving in technology for much longer than we have. It is proven here that humans appeared on Earth around 2 millions Earth years ago, they've been around for a while. The earliest record of human or even Draconian life in Gaea is, oh I'm not sure, maybe only around eight hundred thousand years, Gaea years." 

Van nodded slowly, feeling slightly intimidated to be around such an educated eleven-year-old. He also couldn't help but smile when he heard of Shied speak of Draconians, it made him feel so alive in his own, secretive way. Just at the thought of the word he instantly recalled Vari, his beautiful mother, and her wings, oh she wore them well. Never did he ever lay his eye on a creature any more beautiful than she had been, with her long, angelic figure, forest green hair draping elegantly by her side. He also loved to enkindle on the thought that his parents had not been afraid of the pressures of society; even as two entirely different types of people coming from different worlds, they had believed their love was everything that could matter. Their love had remained strong until the end of their lives, and because of their love, two descendants had grown in their name. 

A small pang of sadness hit him as well, as he thought of Faulcon, and how their endings as brothers had unfortunately gone so bitterly. As he matured Van never thought of him any longer as his dark adversary from Zaibach, but instead, as that older brotherly figure, who taught him about slaying dragons, and conquering fears. The brother he wished he could have only known better, as he did his parents. 

Merle, who had been quietly immersed in a large book of her own written entirely on the feline species, gave up a knowing glance towards Van. She watched him slowly pack away more of the large texts, than her eye peeled on one that caught both their interest. 

"Aha! There it is! I've been meaning to show you guys this," Shied proudly mentioned it first, and handed the hardback towards them. "I believe it has a great link to how Gaea started. It possibly explains how we came to be on Gaea all along, it'll be a great read for Dryden, and the rest of you." 

Van got a hold of the book first, studying intently the front cover, as Merle peeked over his shoulder. 

"Wow," was all Merle could say as she ran her hands over the rough, gold lettering on the aged book. "'Atlantis'," she read aloud. 

Van immediately turned through page after page, quickly skimming over what looked like the unknown history on a disappeared time and age on Earth, a time of the advanced and mythical people of a place called Atlantis. The story was so familiar to him, it got Van plopping himself on the soggy, dead, grass, and giving it a longer look over. 

"So they had an Atlantis too…" Merle finally broke the fascinated silence, joining Van's side. She dusted off all the burrs, which immediately stuck to her over-sized jeans Shied had managed to find her. Shied had done an incredible job in disguising the cat girl. She had on those jeans for one thing, completely hiding those long, furry legs. Her paw feet were enclosed in a pair of size eight discount sneakers Angela had lying around. She wore one of Shied's navy sweaters, and an extra wool winter coat his Mum thankfully had, and lastly a snug, red Aimsa Sharks baseball cap, with her pinkish-red hair tied up in a fluffy ponytail through the adjusting strap hole at the rear of the cap. It amazed him on just how human she was beginning to look. 

"Amazing isn't it? We're not so different from them after all," Shied gave a huge heave of breath as he lifted volumes of encyclopedias into a partly filled cardboard box. He tapped them proudly, as he rested his arm upon it. "These things are pretty expensive, glad I got them discount. A few pages missing and a bit of scribbles here and there are about the only problems." 

"Oh, and I think you should take a read of this book King Van," Shied buried through one of his partly filled boxes and handed Van another thick paperback. 

Van smiled, taking the book, then taking a short second to zip up his polyester spring windbreaker Shied had picked up for him. The April chill was starting to grow crisp, Van was used to the usual warm Gaea weather at this time. 

"_'Economies and Governmental Systems of the World'_," Van read aloud, running his fingers through the yellowing pages. "Is it about politics and such?" 

"Um hum," Shied nodded his confident, little head and pointed a few things out to Van throughout the book. "Gaea could use some of these laws and systems, good for a king to have on hand." 

"I agree," Van nodded and added the book to his amazingly growing pile in his box. He had already picked out basically all of the books he figured he'd be interested in reading. Van didn't honestly know how they planned to carry all of these things back to Dryden once they reached Gaea, but he was figuring to simply play it by ear. He was also quite astonished to see just how many things Shied was planning on carrying along. Did they really _need _all of these things? Van was no scientist, but he figured Dryden and the rest of his elites were pretty clever men, could they not figure these things out on their own? It seemed strange to him that Gaeans would have to be so reliable on the intelligence of other humans in order to advance. Earthlings had to learn using trial and error did they not? If they could do it, he knew Gaeans could as well, as long as they were patient and persistent enough to try. Why didn't Shied just do something more productive? Such as maybe looking to see if he could bring along any medicines, or something of the sort, to help out all the research against all the ailments over in Gaea. There was a good possibility that Earth may experience the same viruses and diseases. But then again, Van was in no position to complain. He wasn't the one who had spent countless years working and building a space ship, he wasn't the one who had to leave home and spend a year of his life in another world, so he wasn't the one to go and try to run the show. Besides, he had good faith that Dryden himself would be paying Earth a visit for four months, or eight and a half Gaea months, next year, there wasn't a doubt in his mind. 

Merle perched herself carefully as she repositioned on the large oak branch of the large, tall tree she sat upon. She gave a bored glance down below, in the direction of Shied and Van continuing to pack the last few items into the many large cardboard boxes. Sighing, she turned her attention back to the newest book she had added to her own collection. It interested her much more than whatever them two could have possibly been discussing. That is probably because Merle could probably guess just what they were talking about, more information on this and that about what they would do with everything once they returned home. 

Funny as it was, Merle did not share their anticipation on returning to Fanelia. That odd feeling seemed very strange to her, as she figured she would be the one who'd be most unhappy on the Mystic Moon, seeing as she was only here for Van. At least for the first few weeks, that had proven true. Despite her coat of fur, she still disliked the cold, and having to remain cooped up inside the hotel. Finally, the cold was starting to become bearable, but then there was nothing but consistent rain almost on a daily basis. The world was in a murky, chilly state, and she hated being hidden under the layers of clothes that felt way too unnatural. She was only lucky she had managed to convince Shied to allow her to let her tail out just above the seam of her jeans. It wasn't comfortable, but she didn't fancy the idea of having her tail flattened within her pant leg either. 

Then again, Merle wasn't all complaints. There were a few things she had begun to get dangerously attached too. One fine example would be without a doubt, Casey, Shied's adorable kitten. She often treated him as if she were a human, constantly picking him up, embracing him, and baby talking to his furry, aloof face. But though she did those human-like things, she had a deeper sense to Casey than that which could be understood by Van, Shied, or anything that wasn't as feline as the two. Merle felt a sense of belonging with Casey, one that wasn't exactly straightforward, but connected in an out-of-sort way. Similar, Merle felt, to the relations between a baby Siamese kitten to that of maybe a baby lion cub. The two were obviously very different in size, nature, and appearance, but deep down within them was still an indefinable connection that rooted back long before the two became different. Merle didn't honestly understand her species, and they didn't have any sort of information so detailed on creatures as on Earth, but Merle knew there were definitely two impulses within her. She was part human, she was part cat, and of course, she would miss Casey on both of those levels. 

She would also miss many other things, not so much the technology of the television, but it's intelligence, or at least the intelligence it portrayed. In one day of sitting by her hotel appliance, she could laugh, cry, learn and fear in all one sitting. It could mesmerize her, bore her, entertain her, or insult her. It was like a whole other personality in itself. 

She would also come to miss the food. It was a funny thing to be upset about leaving the food behind, but they had to face facts, the Mystic Moon made good grub. Merle could eat anything, just about anything that Van would order from room service, or take out. Every meal was something new, something that she wasn't familiar with, and something she couldn't have enough of. She knew Van loved it too; they just didn't serve 'hamburgers', 'pizza', 'spaghetti', 'teriyaki' or any other of their classical favorites in Gaea. Merle wouldn't be surprised to open one of Shied's many boxes and find some take-out and cocktail nuts hidden within those books. Especially salted barbecue peanuts and cashews, Van was a horrid addict. Angela, Shied's Mum, was also a marvelous cook. She had an incredible talent in preparing any fine Japanese, Italian and Chinese dish. She had taught them what the names of many of the meals were, and Merle was pretty sure she had given them a few cookbooks to take along, she was only hoping they had the right ingredients back on Gaea. 

"Hey there kitty, what's up?" Merle glanced upwards in surprise as she spotted Van clumsily weaseling his way through the branches, often losing grip with his penny loafers and smacking his forehead against a budded branch. 

"Picked up the Mystic Moon jargon already, have you?" Merle laughed in amusement as she used both her arms to pull Van up along to the secure section above the oak trunk He had a cluster of dead grass and twigs coating him all over, but Merle simply smiled and pretended not to notice. 

"Yeah, I guess so. Shied is starting to speak with better grammar than me, or _I_," Van gave that kiddish smile he rarely used, and leaned back cautiously on one of the largest branches extending diagonally behind him. His footing wasn't all that great, but he had balanced on the brink of Escaflowne's narrow metallic parts enough times to know how to keep a straight figure. 

Merle was still smiling, and brushed some of the decayed twigs from Van's volumized hair. He was obviously having a lot of fun using that hot tub with all the shampoos and conditioners in their large hotel bathroom. Merle couldn't help but wonder where on earth Shied had squandered up the money to keep them in the Ramada for so long. 

"Look what I found, Shied was telling me about it," Van finally found himself a comfortable resting position sitting upon the diagonal branch, allowing his right leg to dangle and balancing the left on another thinner limb below him. 

"Oh, really, is that a newspaper?" Merle squatted between two large branches, legs supporting her weight in what Van perceived as a nearly impossible position (and definitely a painful one— at least in his case). She carefully took the newspaper from him, wary of the breeze. 

"Is that Shied??" she looked up in surprise, as she studied the faded image in the gritty bundle of papers she held. A definite picture of Shied stood in about the seventh page in, with a giant headline saying 'Young Einstein Conquers World Fair'. 

"Who else?" Van nodded pointing to the article. "It's really impressive, I'm surprised it's not framed and lemonated, or is it laminated? Anyway, can you believe this kid? Wait until Allen finds out that his son has outsmarted him." 

Merle smiled at Van's relaxed attitude, happy to see he was feeling better ever since they had told him of the Hitomi situation a few days before. Even Merle was equally surprised to hear of Hitomi's engagement, but she was more surprised to see just how quickly Van had recovered. It was almost like Hitomi wasn't any of his concern. 

Shutting the thoughts out, Merle focused more on the article she had in her hand: 

**_  
_**

**_'ATHENS, GREECE – commonly known as the home of winning, of striving, of achieving. What other perfect place to host the 2000 International Youth Science Fair, taking place in the large, Hellenic Republic Community Center. A multitude of children from across the world has gathered to proudly demonstrate their scientific accomplishments in a feat for the gold. The recipient of the prestigious Gold Award for Best International Youth Scientific Display would have to be highly qualified, highly educated in all science aspects, determined and well portrayed. A young eleven-year-old boy from Aimsa, Japan, has proved he is this and much more. Recognized scientists of the world marveled at his experiment in complete awe, young Steven Sheizar, has dazzled the best… ' _**

**_  
_**

"Oh my, that's Shied! _Our _Shied Sheizar!" Merle yelped in pride as her eyes tore themselves away from the newsprint and glared at smug Van. 

"That's our Shied alright, a kid from Gaea winning Earth's World Science fair, how incredibly ironic…" Van continued to shake his head in disbelief. 

"But how…" Merle looked on down, off to her right, where Shied was still duct taping the last couple of boxes that they had successfully filled. "He's so young! He's a boy! He hasn't been on the Mystic Moon long enough to know that much about science, has he?" 

"Oh, he didn't have to be _here_ to understand his experiment, I read the whole thing. Shied's display was entirely on Acenomophite, explaining that there is a possible hovering property in rocks after displaying his proof with a chunk of Levee rock from his ship. Can you believe it? Our floating rock has made the kid a genius! But you gotta give him credit though, he did after all go through the exhausting trouble of finding the reason why it floats, and has also proven rocks from Earth are slightly capable of doing the same but less efficiently." 

"Oh no, where did he say he got the rock from?" Merle flustered at the thought of Shied scrambling to explain where he had found the floating Levee rock. 

"He simply pretended he had been hiking near the base of Mt. Fuji and stumbled upon it. It seems doubtful, but the world took it. Shied's a great liar, no offense to him." 

"So… Shied must be a mini celebrity around here isn't he?" Merle gave the picture another look over studying Shied's beautiful display board in the background. 

"Oh yeah, especially since he used practically all his prize money to help out his foster mother, Angela. That kid has a good head on his shoulders, I'm sure we'll all be equally impressed by his personality and intelligence when he's older as well, and is crowned as the Dutch of Frade eventually." 

Merle nodded agreeably, and slowly crept over to Van's perched position. She could see his eyelids were slowly dropping, obviously tired of traveling all this way to the reclusive, empty, partly forested area where the remnants of Shied's ship remained hidden, and where Shied had called 'base'. The breeze was getting colder, and night would be settling in soon. She figured it wouldn't be long before Angela would return in her Toyota to come pick them up. Shied was almost already finished covering the boxes in blue rainproof sheets down below them. 

Van allowed Merle to cuddle in closer, as she usually did most when she was younger. Van couldn't help but notice how rarely she did it now, probably because the two didn't spend too much time together back in Fanelia, with Van's duties always on demand. The sleeve of her large, gray woolen coat with her tiny arm was chained on to his, as she carefully rested her capped head on his shoulder. Van dusted a few dead leaves off his new pair of track pants Shied had gotten for him, and gave Merle a funny look. It was weird to see her in that, wearing all those things. It was odd to see himself as well, but he was slowly adjusting to it. Merle had only been in her guise for a few days, and he found it cute and strange at the same time. He almost felt like he had a young woman of the Mystic Moon holding onto him. 

She purred quietly, keeping the drone to herself. Van had a hard time picturing her at the moment, as she normally looked. Each time he thought of her, the image of a young, ten-year-old kitten-like girl came to mind. He had a hard time picturing her any other way, ever since he had started to take on his profession as King. He saw her usually, but he didn't connect with her much as he did now. He didn't really mean to be so cold towards her, but she seemingly understood. Merle never complained about being ignored, and was contented with the way things were. She loved Van nonetheless, but was a little less expressing of the emotion. Van didn't quite understand it. To him, she was still a child. He had a hard time grasping the thought that Merle had grown to 27 Gaean years before his eyes, which equaled to basically 15 Earth years. She had grown up without him realizing it, she had grown independent, and even dropped the whole "Lord Van" thing every once and a while. Merle was her own self, and the thought of letting her go bothered Van. Would it be that one day Merle would want to leave Van, pursue something of her own? Merle didn't have any family either than Van though, and only a few friends. She hardly left the Fanelia Empire, but she was starting to have this sort of independence about her, braving things out, looking solitarily. He didn't know of any other people of her kind, either than Aria and Naria whom had been his brother's feline friends, but he remembered that they had been killed long ago in one of their battles. 

"Can you believe we'll be leaving in just under a week?" He felt her head move slightly on his shoulder bringing him back to mid-tree reality, her big, earnest eyes staring at him as usual beyond the visor of her Sharks cap. 

Van shook his head in reply, "Not at all, the adventure only seems to be beginning. Fanelia is at the back of my mind, it doesn't seem to be right to be going back already." 

"Van," Merle started again with her new train of thoughts. "Lord Van, you still have a few more days, why don't you go and find her? Please? Just for the sake of knowing you tried?" 

Van sat dumbfounded, pretending as if he wasn't aware of what Merle was speaking of, "Whom should I find?" 

"Van…" Merle's tone grew impatient; he had been avoiding the topic ever since Shied had discussed those details with him. She knew Van. She knew deep down finding about what happened to only girl he had ever loved was hurting him. Knowing that she had successfully moved on, blocked him out, and was getting married. Van had been weak and hurt when he had almost lost Hitomi to Allen. What more pain would there be when he travels all this way to see her so many years later to realize it was for nothing? But Van's determination should not end there, knowing him; he would get to the bottom of things. That was the kind of attitude Merle was trying to raise. 

"Merle, you heard what Shied said about her," Van replied dryly, finally going along with it. "Let her live her life, we must be more concerned on getting back safely and bringing all these things to Gaea." 

"That's not what we came here to do Van!" Mere continued to argue, her voice trembling the branches around them. "We are _here _for _Hitomi, _don't you understand that? You have time, Lord Van. Not much, but enough. If you don't do something now, don't come running back in eight years or five Earth years or whatever hoping things are still the same. You do what you can with what you've got, this is your second chance, and maybe your only one left. You should know that." 

Van shoved over a bit, hesitantly, not to fond of replying to Merle's comment. 

"Merle, Shied needs my help around here. I have to help him gather more things and repay him for his debts to us. She's_ not _priority, so sorry." 

Merle didn't answer back this time, but instead hid her eyes again beneath the shadow of her duckbill visor. Van closed his eyes and sighed, wishing there was a way he could tell Merle what he was thinking. But Van was Van, and his secretive, closed way was the way he lived. Merle knew that, he figured she was frustrated by it, and had had enough. Feeling a little sorry for himself, and for his friend, he tucked her in closer, despite their arguments. 

Van understood what Merle had been trying to do. He knew that she was only trying to go through every possible way to make him happy. And what's more, Van knew that Merle knew what he needed to be happy. But he decided Merle would just have to sit it out and face the facts, this was the way things had played out, and they had to deal with it. There wasn't any other choice. It was just the two of them now. Merle was the very last family Van had left, and Van was the very last family Merle had left. They had both grown, from their childhood ways, to their tough adult times, but he would make sure she was always with him. She was all at once his sister, his friend, his admirer, and his teacher. He loved Merle, and that was the way it would always be, young and old alike. 

* * * 

Angela Ferentini gave a kind glance in her rearview mirror. She spotted the two, the tall man named Van, and his cat-like friend asleep in the cramped, backseat. Van's head awkwardly bobbed against the car window, but he didn't seem to be noticing. The cat girl, Merle, was comfortably draped on his chest, tired after a long day of packing and preparations. Angela noticed that Van's seatbelt was on, she figured Merle had finally convinced him to wear it, they had been arguing about car safety on the way over. She smiled as she recollected on Merle ducking her head out the window, exhilarated for her first time to ride in a gas-powered car. She had been going on and on about the speed, the comfortable seating, the windows and whatever other little detail that fascinated her. Angela found it entertaining to be able to entertain those who could find the simplest things wonderful. 

She brushed a wavy, dirty blonde strand back behind her ear, then fixed her hands back on the wheel. Shied's 'base' was about a three hour long drive or so from their home, located on the rural outskirts of Aimsa. It didn't bother her much to drive them though, she was always willing to lend a hand, and besides, it was a beautiful and scenic route. In between the dense forest trees she could spot the colorful roofs of Pagoda houses, which they didn't have too much of back in the city. The night moon glinted on their wooden panels, as it peeked out through the treetops. All around it was a dense green foliage, full of many April azaleas covering the hillsides, and dozens of peony trees, ready to bloom when May came rolling in. Further north Angela could see the glint of the night stars reflected in the vast expanse of the Sea of Japan, blending itself into the dark horizon. Over to the northeast and further on behind them she could barely make out the tips of the colossal snow capped mountains, and probably among them was the dormant Mt. Fuji, a blazing volcano amongst the tranquil winter mountain scene. 

Yawning, Angela fought to keep her eyes open as she spotted the glimmering city lights up ahead. She could already spot Gore Park amongst it all, glowing through the shadows of the large office towers around it. She was surprised the city kept it lit up until now, but she was glad they did, it was a beautiful addition to the busy streets of downtown. She also noticed that the car radio was still on, muffled and hard to hear, as she had turned it down for her sleeping company earlier on. She reached her hand down and turned the knob until she heard the satisfying off-click, and couldn't help but sneak a sideways glance in Shied's direction. 

The young boy laid his head gently to the left of the car seat, eyes closed, blonde wisps of bangs falling down near his ears. His seatbelt jarred into his chin with every little bump, and as motherly as ever, Angela extended her right hand and slowly adjusted it down past his shoulder. She smiled. She just couldn't help it; just the simple sound of his contented breathing gave her a pleased feeling. He was so young, so bright, and so perfect. 

Angela fought hard to keep her eyes focused, as she could already sense her throat tighten and her eyes blur over. She gripped the wheel a little tighter, and felt a heaviness come upon her as she stared blankly before her, thinking. 

Shied. 

She loved her Shied. He was hers. He had been hers the day she had laid her eyes on the poor, distraught boy, in that lonely hospital room. She knew in an instant he needed a home, and no matter what, she would be the one to provide it. He had been hers the second his small arms had fallen into hers, hers the second she had smiled at him and he had returned it, hers since the first time and every time after she tucked him in and kissed him to sleep. She looked at him again, she couldn't resist. That was the kid she loved, the kid that loved her back. Sure, Angela might not be the wealthiest woman in the world, but Shied was happy, and so was she. She would do anything for Shied, absolutely anything; that was a fact. 

Angela sniffled quietly to herself, trying to remember she had guests in the vehicle. But their silence was of no help, and her mind wandered once again. Angela didn't have much of a family. Her mother and father had both died back in Italy because of lung failure and a heart attack. Angela's only brother lived in the States, and visited her only once back in Christmas 1996, four years ago. She had dropped out of high school at seventeen to live with her boyfriend. A year later, she was single, and signing up for an abortion. After that, she had moved to Aimsa in hopes for a promising future, and to abandon her past behind her. She was partly successful, meeting new friends, new people to get acquainted with. But Angela never did return to school, and lived off of temporary, low-paying jobs. Angela knew she didn't exactly live in the safest or most thriving neighborhood, but she couldn't afford better. Her life had been treading this trail since the beginning, and she expected no different. She didn't consider much of surprises, until the day she met Shied. 

He had just been lying there, looking in aspiration through the hospital blinds, seemingly in awe. She had been walking through the children's ward, giving out toys and candy to give to the children, doing her part for her Church society, when the young lad had caught her eye. His small thin frame, yet his complex dialogue and polite manner specifically intrigued her. She couldn't help but love the way she had to come into his room, and show him how to pull up the blinds if he wanted to see outside. She had given him one of her favorite stuffed animals she had purchased cheap off of Liquidation World, a gray cat, which he named Casey. Of course, it was that gift that inspired her to go out and get Shied the real thing that very Christmas. It was a long battle to win custody over Shied. For one thing, his mysterious history concerned the Children's Welfare Aid of Japan, believing that the child was delusional, a victim of abuse from parents that may well be alive. But Shied was very clever, undergoing the alias "Steven Sheizar", and playing his cards right until Children's Aid declared him stable, yet emotionally scarred. Seeing as he had no home, and no known history record, but also no signs of physical abuse or sickness, they decided he could live in a foster home for recuperation as a Japanese citizen. Angela had jumped at the opportunity. She couldn't come up with a good reason why at the moment, seeing as she had no one to raise the child with, and barely enough to support herself, but God was willing that day. She felt that she, more than anyone, had shown just how much she needed Shied. She showed that no matter the financial situation, or what not, the relationship between her and her son-to-be would never wither, and never die down. Angela was simply living in hope, knowing her chances were fairly slim. Surprisingly, in February 1999, they allowed Angela to care for Shied for what was like a ninety-day trial period. Remarkably, Shied had developed well under her care. He had grown an instant liking to her; her resemblance to Princess Marlene was uncanny. But more so, he loved the way she never doubted him. She believed every word about Gaea, and had never told another living soul. She voluntarily took a second job, yet each day managed to take and pick up Shied from school. It wasn't long after his first few weeks in Elementary school did Shied go ahead and win his school science fair, the school board district science fair, and then finalize for the Aimsa Youth Science Fair Competition. By then, the Children's Aid found Angela astonishingly credible and capable, and eventually assigned her full custody. During that time, Shied had advanced to the regional finals, and finally to the Youth Science and Technology Fair of Japan. After smoking that one with a dazzling display board, detailed hand-drawn diagrams, volumes of research, page after page of thorough scientific observations and analysis, and of course a wonderfully intelligent and enlightening presentation, he won the hearts of many as he conquered the fierce competition of the entire world in Athens, Greece with only the support of his mother, and his boasting Japanese and Aimsa fans. But it wasn't any of this that had blown the world away, or Angela herself. Though she was unbelievably proud, Shied's gift of all of his total prize money from each science fair, a whopping 1,572,000 ¥ ($12,500 American) left her entirely speechless as he had given it all to her. It had scratched on headlines all over Aimsa. Seeing as the family was slightly in debt due to Shied's science fair expenses, Angela only utilized a small portion of his gift to help out around the house. She convinced him to keep the rest, which he basically spent some on charity, some on Casey and his Mum, and basically the rest on purchasing sale books and booking that hotel for his friends. Shied hadn't kept a dime for himself. 

Angela winced suddenly, knowing that she could never let go of such an angel. He was what she lived for, worked for, and what she would die for. She would never let anyone _ever_ take that away from her! But what was worse, was that Angela knew no one _was _taking Shied away from her, no one. Shied was going to leave because of his own choice, it had been his decision. How could Angela hold it against him? That world, Gaea, was his real home after all, and he had others that loved him there as well. If he was such a miracle to her, she knew that he also must mean the world to them, and Shied was rightfully theirs. 

Angela didn't know how to explain his disappearance to the officials once he left, nor did she care. She was regrettably making the decision to lose her only son in just a matter of a few more days. She didn't know how she would see those days go by through all her crying, but she would have to, somehow. 

Her frail, right hand let go of the wheel again, and rested itself upon Shied's shoulder. She felt his chin nuzzle up against her fingers, in the most loving affectionate manner. 

"I love you Mum," Shied whispered, barely within earshot, obviously playing his 'I'm asleep' game while he was apparently awake. 

"I love you too Shied…" was all Angela could master to reply, staring ahead yet seeing nothing, as a single tear raced down her cheek.


	10. Unforgettable

**10.) Unforgettable**

  
The song was barely drifting throughout Hitomi's mind. She could hear it; hear it all over, so quiet and soft yet ever persistent, going over and over again. It raged at her heart, and played with her mind. The words hit her the most, giving her the most unexplainable feeling, similar to a breeze through a room with no windows. And so on it's melody went, dancing with the images she saw and the emotions she felt. Hitomi was beginning to drift, and lose herself into a sunken depth of dreams and reality. 

  


**_ "Unforgettable… That's what you are…"_**

  
_"Why have you forgotten me??" _

  
The strong, hushing voice impelled out of nowhere, and Hitomi's eyes shot open in surprise. A drifting melody of a song that repeated endlessly played faintly in the background, in the background of what? Hitomi found herself, no longer sleeping in the secure comfort of her bedroom, but instead floating weightlessly in literally nothingness! She could see nothing beyond her at all, only a pitch-black darkness that was the same all around. She felt her eyes, with her trembling fingers, feeling her eyelids pulled back, knowing that they were open yet completely blind. She knew her arms and legs were sprawled out, helplessly swimming in emptiness, but she couldn't even see where they were. Panic was easily residing in her feeble body. All her senses were vanishing, all except one. She continued to hear. She could only listen to a song and a demanding voice that was talking to her… 

  
_ "You promised me." _

  
Hitomi felt her heart begin to race with worry, as her mind began to sharpen since she awoke in this odd place. Her thoughts were slowly registering, as if waking on a groggy morning, and a frightened feeling became impeccable. Scared, she flung her arms this way and that, trying to escape the dreary world, feeling a clamming sensation jar her throat. She waited for more words to speak out of nowhere, but she heard nothing but that drifting melody… 

  
** "Promised you what? Who are you??"**

  
Hitomi's voice was surprisingly loud and powerful in the realm of darkness. She stilled herself, although she couldn't be entirely sure if she was still floating in any direction, she couldn't feel a thing about position or location. Her fists were tightly clenched, and she could still make out that ever-annoying song, barely audible above her deep, anxious breaths. She was here, alone, trapped in another one of her psychotic visions with God knows what, talking to her. 

  
_ "You promised me you would never forget."_

  
Hitomi was taken slightly aback by the invisible entity's response, and thought it over. The voice was beginning to become less intimidating, and a slight bit more conversational, as if it just wanted to talk. Whoever did the talking though, was still beyond her sight, and there was still not a speck of light where she lay, or stood, or floated. Hitomi felt a new feeling within her aside from stress and fear: frustration. She didn't understand why that stupid song would be playing, or why that voice was speaking to her. She was hearing voices in her head. Hitomi was slowly convincing herself she was losing it. 

  
** "I asked you before, who are you? Tell me! Tell me, who are you and what have I forgotten huh? TELL ME!"**

  
Hitomi's voice rose with a mixture of fear and aggravation. She wanted nothing but to get out of here, of this weird, eerie dimension she didn't long to be a part of. The least that could help was for this voice to be a little more straightforward and for that song to shut up. 

  
_ "You promised me you would never forget. I have never forgotten you in any time, in any place."_

  


  
**_"Unforgettable… Tho' near or far…"_**

  
** "What is that supposed to mean?? Who the hell are you!! GET ME OUT OF HERE!!! Will someone please shut that stupid song off!?!"**

  
Hitomi's anger blended with her full consciousness as she realized her only means here was to escape. She didn't care about whatever promises or other junk that voice was endlessly blabbing about in confusing riddles; she figured it was just another figment of her disturbed mind. She decided to pay it no heed, and widened her eyes as if it would only help something to become visible in the pit of black. 

  
_ "The song will continue to play until you understand, Hitomi."_

  
Hitomi could feel a powerful sense rise in her, one of demand and one of anxiety at the same time. She swam along the blankness, as if to progress back to where she started, then let out a scream of frustration. Her legs kicked madly in front of her, every so often hitting herself, as she could not see where they were. Her fingers were plodded deep into her ears, trying to shut out her surroundings, trying to will herself back to sleep. But it was obviously futile, both the music and the voice was apparently not something that she heard, but something in her mind. She could have been entirely deaf, but the sounds would not go away. They were living in her head. 

  
** "WHO… ARE … YOU??!!!??"**

  
Hitomi took in deep, slow breaths, trying to relax herself as she had been taught in her psychiatric sessions so long ago. It was actually pretty helpful, as she sensed her mind becoming slightly more rational in this irrational state of being. After all, she had managed so far from letting out in a scream of insane wails and profanity. 

  
_ "Let me show you."_

  
Hitomi, even more taken aback by the response this time, let out a huge sigh of relief at the voice's newfound cooperation. Unfortunately, her sigh did not last long, turning more into a garbled recycle of air then into a full pledged shrieking scream. If anything had been frightening in the vision so far (keeping in mind that everything was pretty equally frightening), this had to be the worst sensation of them all. There wasn't a doubt in Hitomi's mind. 

  
She was falling. 

  
She shut her eyes quickly, managing to actually block out the music for a few seconds underneath the shrillness of her cries for help. She could sense the horridly realistic feeling of wind gushing past her traumatized body at amazing speeds, dangerous speeds. She could feel nothing that could hold her back, no safety cords or strings, nothing but the clothes she wore upon her to break the fall she was obviously in. She had never felt such a sensation as freefalling, ever in her life. It was too intense for such a simple-minded girl who found roller coasters intimidating. Her screams were too loud that it not only hurt her throat, but ears as well. Through her tightly squeezed eyelids, she could see a faint lightness appear as a bright, red blotch. 

  
She opened her eyes quickly; there was light! Hitomi was surprised by it, but didn't have much time to think at such a critical situation. All these thoughts were streaming through her head in underneath a second, but her mind stretched it out for her to feel everything in a slow-motion sense, as if to add to the agony. 

  
The light above her, drifting away quickly, was a bright white slit at the mouth of the crevasse, which she knew in an instant she was falling into. Her vision adjusted enough to make out the walls of lines rushing past her in astonishing speeds. The lines were nothing but the gritty dividers between the hundreds of layers of aged rock of the surrounding ground she was falling deeper within. Hitomi knew all this already. Her mind processed everything at even a faster rate than she was falling. Hitomi knew it all too well. 

  
This was her nightmare. This was that ever-consistent dream that bothered her night after night, and woe begone, here she was living it. There was a major difference though between a vision and a dream. In dreams Hitomi didn't feel a sense of danger, or insecurity. In dreams Hitomi wasn't able to function herself, or talk to other characters. In dreams Hitomi wasn't able to feel emotions, or think and comprehend, and most importantly, feel the sense of not only danger, but also death. 

  
Death. Hitomi could feel its presence, knocking at her door. She knew without much of a doubt that this was no bottomless pit. One way or the other, the ending of this was inevitable. She couldn't quite believe it! Death was the word that lingered. But then Hitomi remembered, her dream was not quite over yet now was it... There was always that second part… the part when… 

  


_** "Like a song of love that clings to me…"**_

  
As if on signal, just like a bullet streaming through the air, a dashing figure ripped through the minifying wall of light above, at first nothing more than a dark speck in the sky, but evolving into a swift, mysterious shape sending after her at almost double the speed she fell. 

  
Hitomi's heart pounced lightly with a beat of hope. She felt a strange sense of safety as the figure closed in on her. Her mind, delusional with fear and relief, watched in awe as the outline of silver-glimmering wings flooded her view, as it did nearly every night, but never as great, never as real… 

  
Feathers, bright beautiful feathers, just like the ones she had seen in her vision by the bakery, glided delicately by her side. A smile crept its way onto Hitomi's once traumatized image. She could see him now, coming closer, becoming clearer. Hitomi's frail heart pounded mercilessly, knowing this was where the dream always ended. This was the point where she would awake and know everything she had seen meant nothing at all, but now… but now… she wasn't going anywhere. Her mind was focused on what was happening, there was no waking up now, for she was already fully awake. 

  
Her right hand drifted itself up to the angelic figure, looking to reach the gloved hand that longed to grasp her own. His hair flowing dreamily in the rush of wind seemed to slow as time did itself. His muscled arm extended, seemed to creep closer to hers, until their fingers were merely inches apart. She gazed into the face she could never clearly see, then instantly, Hitomi knew. 

  
It was not Allen. 

  
It was not Amano. 

  
The winged figure of which she always saw, of whom had saved her life that fateful day which Hitomi knew existed and no longer denied, had been a person she had known and had forgotten all along. He had been right. She had broken her promise. Hitomi had forgotten all along, until now, until he had saved her life once again. 

  
_"Hitomi, now should I tell you who I am?"_

  


  
**"No Van, I already know."**

  
_**"How the thought of you does things to me…"**_

  
Millions of questioning thoughts blazed through her mind as she allowed him to sweep her into his strong arms, and feel the immense power flowing through the muscles of his beautiful wings, wings with not just beauty but strength, strength as in a 3metre wingspan. Her mind dazed, she barely noticed as he fought incredibly to pull them past the weighs of gravity in a dizzying funnel of wind, and back to the open again. Hitomi didn't even notice herself appear once more into the usual room of nothingness, the scene before having entirely disappeared. 

  
Van. Van. Van. 

  
It was the underlying thought that insisted at her, as persistent enough as even the song that still continued to play though Hitomi barely noticed. She was thinking of many things, many things that required many hours of thinking. Her mind searched, puzzled, and questioned, but the result was never clear. 

  
Van. That name had never meant much more to her than the kid she often saw in dreams or that one vision. She had been convinced that was all that 'Van Fanel' ever was and ever would be, a creation of her mind. This was what Hitomi was trained to believe. This was what had been constantly drilled into her mind until the thought never escaped, and began to be accepted as reality. Hitomi had developed a barrier in her therapy years, a mental barrier that was stronger than any physical wall that could ever be built. Hitomi's mind had convinced itself, and convinced everyone else, that there were no secrets to her. There was no mixed past. Everything was normal, average, and just what the doctor ordered. 

  
It turned out her wall was not as strong and stable as she had thought it to be. 

  
There was a brick missing, a small brick out of thousands, but just enough to let something leak in from the other side. Just enough to enable her mind to play with her thoughts, to enkindle the memories she had forcibly put away. And now it was too late, there was no blocking out what had come through. What Hitomi knew now could not be erased, and would not be forgotten any time soon. 

  
Van Fanel was not just the person within her visions. Van was not just an ordinary person, as Hitomi was not an ordinary girl. Van was very different; very real, he was very special from anyone else she had ever known. Hitomi knew now, Van was that boy who had said her name as in her vision, who had said he loved her. Hitomi was that girl, that girl who had left, the girl he missed, the girl from the Mystic Moon. Hitomi knew that Van, more so her affection to Van, her love to Van, was the incessant power behind all of her visions, behind her dreams, behind her premonitions, even behind the magic of her pendant! But he was not just a boy she had once known. Van was also the man she had met in Gore Park that fateful night, when the stars aligned in their favor; that had been Van Fanel as well. She couldn't explain it, nor could she understand it, but she knew it, and that was that. He was in her dreams, in her visions, in her world, and now in her heart. Van had come for her. 

  
Things started to settle in Hitomi's clouded mind, understanding yet confused. She knew now that she had all the pieces to Van's puzzle, but the problem was putting them together. She knew not what he wanted from her, she knew not why he came for her, and she knew not why she felt so strongly for him, a stranger yet a friend all at the same time. 

  
** "Van… I am so sorry."**

  
Despite all that ran through her head, she had a feeling he was still with her, listening, and waiting, until she would come back to him and know everything she once did. For the first time in a long time, Hitomi was trying to remember the Time. The Time would be the key to putting the many pieces in place. 

  
_ "It's not your fault, Hitomi. I'm sorry you had to go through all that you did."_

  
** "Van… please, show me more! I… I… know I can remember you… if I try… if you'll help me."**

  
Hitomi felt a comforting feeling all over, as if the Van she could not see was smiling with her. She blinked sullenly in the darkness, overwhelmed with her personal thoughts and reflections. She narrowed it all down to one thing. One longing that was beginning to grow within her, a longing to remember, a longing to know, a longing to love the way she knew she once did. 

  
As expected, Hitomi drifted on to another setting, another vague yet familiar memory relived through the Van that moved inside of her. Her fear had departed and only the longing remained. She now had the rare opportunity to turn her life around, and finally dive into the chapter she had skipped one too many times. There was no denying it now. There was no one to tell her what she could and could not believe. There was no outside world to her at the moment being; it was just Hitomi and Van and the past they had left behind. 

  
**_

"Never before has someone been more…"

_**

  
Hitomi let out a startled breath as she found herself standing, actually standing inside, a gloomy, dim-lit room. She stood still for a moment, as if to grasp things and try to make sense of her surroundings. Thoughts slowly came to, such as the realization she was still wearing that Warden sweater and jogging pants she had worn before she fell asleep, and that the music, the song that had been bugging her constantly, was still there. After blinking blankly for a few seconds, Hitomi turned to see lined figures before her. They were bars. Prison bars. 

  
Hitomi was in a prison cell, an old-fashioned prison cell! She noticed instantly that she was in a very strange setting, as if back to the Medieval times of knights, and kings and queens. The armor of the prison guards looked almost ancient to her, and the prison itself looked more like a dungeon than any modern-day correctional facility. 

  
It didn't take her too long to figure it out, as she ran her fingers over the grimy, black steel, which held her captive, which held them captive. She had to stare for a moment to let her eyes adjust to the weak lighting, and noticed she was staring at three, motionless figures sitting bleakly on the other side of the cell with her. One of them was Van, Van Fanel. 

  
"Van!" Hitomi let out an excited shout, running over to the person she had been thinking about so much lately. She was wondering if he would remember what they had been talking about, about the promises and all. 

  
But then Hitomi's smile instantly faded. She stood directly before his slouched image, crying his name with joy, but noticing his inattentive response. She knew in a second's time, he couldn't see her. She stood right there, right in front of him, merely inches away, and yet he didn't even know. The disappointment that flashed across Hitomi's face was blankly obvious. She had been hoping that she might be able to talk to him, face to face, with one another. But it looked as if her mind intended this to be one of those visions in which Hitomi was simply the silent spectator. She would just have to hang around and watch what would come to happen. 

  
Sighing, Hitomi turned her attention to Van's other two inmates. She recognized the girl quite easily; it wasn't hard to forget such a furry face. It was that Merle-cat, that whiny little one from her previous vision. As Hitomi studied the poignant figure clung onto the pensive Van's arm, she couldn't help but analyze the thoughts that began forming in her mind. She looked at Merle carefully, examined every little detail as things were starting to come to. She remembered… small things, little things… such as Merle's undoubted curiosity, when she would often pry through all of Hitomi's belongings at one time or another. And also, there was that look. That worry-stricken look that peeled on Merle's face every time Van engaged in something dangerous, or life threatening. And of course there was Merle's stubborn attitude always craving for attention, always out to give Hitomi a hard time. 

  
Hitomi smiled. She was doing it! She was remembering! By just automatically knowing these things about Merle, she knew a part of that mysterious puzzle had been joined together. She had managed to decipher enough clues to hint her just a step closer to answering that longing within her. Each step, each connected piece, brought her further from her reality and further into the reality, the real reality. 

  
Proud of her mental accomplishments so far, Hitomi focused her attention to the third figure, standing by the bars, looking out into the murky hallways where she could see guards aimlessly walking by. She had to center out her other thoughts, and try not to let them interfere. There was this insisting intuition telling her she knew this figure, this man, from somewhere. In fact, her mind had it played that it was Amano! But Hitomi knew that was silly. She had seen this particular man in her vision before, the one running from her and calling her name, and she knew it was not Amano. Amano did not have the same sapphire eyes, nor the pale blonde hair that swept clear past his waist. She knew this was no Amano, though someone quite similar, it was Allen. She could only come up with the name because she remembered herself knowing it for some reason from before. She remembered this 'Allen', but much vaguely than she remembered Van or Merle. Hitomi had to stay still, let her mind relax yet focus to try and understand his part of the mystery. 

  
Allen. Allen what? Hitomi didn't know, yet she knew that somewhere deep within she knew everything about him, his last name, his family, everything. But where was that memory now? She would have to continue staring at him until she found that out. 

  
As Hitomi stepped closer she began to realize a strange feeling growing inside her concerning this Allen. While she silently watched him gazing through those sturdy poles she knew there was an odd… an odd addition to their relationship. She knew that she had known him before, most likely even had been friends with him, but there was more… much more to that than just friendship. 

  
Hitomi squinted her eyes as she tried to figure it out… thinking slowly. 

  
"Lord Van, why are they keeping us here?" Hitomi turned her attention as the little Merle tugged incessantly at Van's burgundy top. 

  
She watched Van let out a small, exasperated sigh as he too turned his attention beyond the prison bars. Hitomi could tell that he knew why they were in the prison, but he didn't understand why it was necessary. She knew and he knew that they had done nothing wrong to those who had imprisoned them. 

  
"I'm not too sure Merle, I guess Frade just has some sort of problem with us," Van finally replied then gave a look up to Allen who was still standing motionless by the gate. Hitomi noticed Allen's guise; it seemed strange. She could recall him wearing a more… more formal outfit in her other vision; he had even looked somewhat like a medieval knight! But now she noticed Allen was dressed in a long, pale green piece of clothing that stretched down to his ankles. 

  
'Somewhat like a hospital gown…' a thought occurred at Hitomi's mind. As she watched she caught Allen wincing every so often, hunching over and leaning slightly to the left. She began wondering if he had been hurt, she could sense he was probably suffering from some sort of injury. 

  
"How much longer do they have to question her?" Hitomi looked on alarmed as Van suddenly arose and stood by his taller companion. He too watched the guards outside their pen, hoping only for the opportunity to escape. Hitomi could sense escape was the one thing on both Allen's and Van's minds. 

  
Allen frowned, his face buried in thought, "Who knows, but we'll soon be next. With all of Hitomi's mind powers I'm sure Plactu would take extra time to hear her out. This is all such a waste of time… she didn't do anything and neither did we." 

  
Van nodded agreeably, and simply acted submissive as he felt Merle's frightened little hand take his. Hitomi watched this all incredibly curiously, trusting them and feeling that they were innocent. Why would Van, wonderful Van, and sincere Allen, and little Merle be guilty of anything, especially imprisonment? 

  
But even before any other thought could strike Hitomi's pondering mind a loud shrill scream pierced from a room far down the prison halls. Hitomi nearly fell back in surprise, as old-fashioned prison guards ran past quickly in all the commotion. But Hitomi's thoughts were elsewhere now. That scream, that scream had sounded like… well almost like hers! Her own voice! Hitomi didn't know what to make of it! Had that been her? 

  
Obviously, her fellow friends were concerned with the situation as well, confirming that the scream had come from her, from her in another time and place. 

  
"Hitomi!" Allen let out a worried breath, straining his eyes to see past the walls and to the direction the many soldiers were now headed. He could hear many worried voices discussing, and sometimes even shouting orders. 

  
Van wasn't acting very placid himself. He paced quickly annoyed at his lack of freedom at such a critical time. Catching sight of Merle's worried stricken face, he knew he couldn't take much more. 

  
"HEY!! What's happening?!?!" Van repeated, and yelled over and over, screaming to the guards who insensitively ran by. They didn't pay much heed to any of their unruly prisoners. 

  
"What is happening? HEY!" Van's impatience and worry was too commanding, and he reached his arm out managing to barely grasp the shoulder of one of the hurrying guards who scarcely paid him mind. 

  
The hall lanterns glimmered on the guard's baldhead, as he leaned in closer to hear Van's words amongst the turmoil. 

  
"What was that scream?" 

  
The guard did not hesitate to answer, "The prisoner's heart stopped." 

  
Turning after satisfying them, the guard flung down the brick stairs and disappeared from sight. Hitomi watched in total awe and disbelief amongst the many gasps of her fellow inmates. Were they talking about _her_, herself of this time? Had her heart actually stopped before in this bizarre place? Was she ever that close to death as for her heart to stop beating? 

  
Hitomi turned to see Van's face paling, his grip tightening immensely as he clutched the bars with fear. She could sense him endlessly wondering what he was to do, what he could do to help her… in that other time… 

  
"Oh Hitomi…" Merle's anxious voice once again cut the silence, right before young Prince Shied's came cutting in. 

  
"Allen! Allen!" The small boy with arms flailing came running from down the prison hall to quickly stop outside their cell, panting from the run and nervous with the urgency. 

  
"Hitomi, it's Hitomi!" 

  
Van quickly bent over and glared at the young prince in his small green uniform complete with a feather crown through the square view between each rail. 

  
"Please Highness, let us out of here now," Van's demanding voice came out as a mixture of a command and a plea, perfectly aware that Shied was the only one who could help Van, and Van was the only one who could help Hitomi. 

  
Hitomi herself watched anxiously, wondering why Prince Shied would come to prisoners for help, but then again, the prisoners were Hitomi's friends after all. Hitomi wondered at why she was referring to herself as a third person, but decided not to think of it and watched the dramatic scene take place in her wonder of silence. 

  
"But I-" Shied began to stammer nervously; pressure being so adequately placed on his shoulders. "But I can't!" 

  
Hitomi could feel her heart whipping around recklessly, as her eyes busily watched, and listened, and waited with dire anticipation to see what would become of Hitomi. She was bound to live, after all she wouldn't be standing here today if Hitomi were to die, but she didn't know with visions, anything was possible. 

  
"_Please_ hurry, I'm begging you Highness!" 

  
Allen watched in total aggravation as Shied sadly shook his head in response to Van's cries for help. There was no time. He knew that. He wasn't going to put up with being locked up in a cell for no reason, while his friend was on the brink of life and death. 

  
** "Come here!"**

  
Allen's harsh tone came as a surprise to all, and even more so when his right arm quickly looped through the bars and violently pulled the young Prince towards him, pinning him in-between the bars and himself. 

  
Hitomi, taken aback by the action, watched in pure uneasiness as did Merle, feeling each second stretch by longer than was necessary, feeling each second wasted was already a second too late. 

  
"Highness!!!" 

  
Hitomi's head jerked upwards in surprise as she saw a heavy-built, coloured man with a Mohawk cut angrily appear by their cell, giving Allen a very dangerous warning glance. Hitomi could sense that this man had something to do with Shied, he protected him, and she knew that he was no friend to Allen. 

  
Allen quickly sensed the anger easily transmitted from the man on the other side as well as the many armored guards who accompanied him. 

  
"Just open the door…please," Hitomi sensed Allen's tone, commanding yet rational. 

  
The man grimaced easily not fond of bending backwards for a prisoner, but totally conscious of the well being of his Prince. He knew he'd have to make a regrettable decision. 

  
"Don't think that you're going to get away with this, Allen Sheizar," he made the most scornful look as his other guards and servants unlocked the large gate of Hitomi's prison cell for the sake of Shied. 

  
"We'll see about that, now just move!!" Allen, still defensively gripping to the helpless boy, waited to make sure Merle and Van were free as well. He also made sure that the guards wouldn't touch any of them until they made their way to Hitomi. 

  
Hitomi herself had to quickly scamper out with Merle just as the gate was shut behind her, the guards of course not aware of her presence. She was glad to see of their escape, but worried to see Allen's new change of attitude. She had a feeling that rising against authority wasn't his style (more like Van's) but he had to do what was necessary at the moment, and hell, it had worked. 

  
She looked ahead to see Van already running at top speed, racing through the dimly lit halls in the direction of the uproar. Merle was scampering alongside, running swiftly on all fours at astounding speeds. 

  
Hitomi picked up her own pace, catching up easily, sensing that her running skills hadn't lacked over the years after all. Her mind tried to focus, and she tried to set herself into the scene. It was hard though, for it was very unlike the falling vision. In that falling-angel vision she had at least been experiencing it head-on. In this one, she didn't have much panic racing through her, knowing if it was another Hitomi they were dealing with, than she wasn't in any danger at all. 

  
Still, Hitomi couldn't help but feel a load of relief as they finally arrived at what was the interrogation room, lit brightly by the illumination floating from the glare of the two moons shining in between wooden bars, high up in the skylight. 

  
Her eyes quickly examined her surroundings, spotting a fair-haired, light blonde woman sitting dressed in a conservative pink Maiden's gown, directly above her limp body amongst the building crowd. Hitomi had to stand still for a long time to grasp it all. _That was her!_ She moved closer, and of course she knew it was true. Hitomi could see Hitomi, herself of this time, laying unmoving without response on the hard, concrete floor in her old high-school uniform. Hitomi found it absolutely astonishing yet frightening at the same time. Her own image looked about as good as dead, eyes fogged over with a worrisome glisten. That woman was perched beside her fainted body, hands placed firmly in the center of her still chest, feverishly pounding in a continuous pattern quite like CPR, in a dire attempt to rescue her, to rescue Hitomi. Her attempts so far proved unsuccessful. 

  
Hitomi's live heart leaped, and she could feel the sweat beginning to build along her palms. She felt so close yet so distant from the action all at once. She wanted to scream at her fainted self to get up and to quit scaring the living daylights out of everyone, but still her reflected image remained immobile and daunting. 

  
"Come on Hitomi, just hold on, don't die Hitomi!" The woman was constantly hushing pleads to the frozen body, as her own body pounded hard in hopes that the young girl would come to, that she would be alright. In the agonizing moments that passed, Hitomi still lay lifeless. 

  
"Hitomi, hold on, you'll be okay!" 

  
The others watched in breathless anticipation as well, Merle having to hold back to contain tears, Allen still gripping Shied but mainly more because of worry than ransom. 

  
Van immediately appeared by the woman's side the second he approached the room. Hitomi also sensed a name for her helper at the same time: Princess Milerna. 

  
Milerna, still endlessly pumping imaginary life worriedly, saw the lines of anxiety scratch across Van's face. She felt a sudden compassion towards him, knowing she had to return Hitomi to life, if not for herself and for everyone else, but for Van. 

  
"Her heart won't start," she stated the obvious to him, hoping that he would have an idea. 

  
Van did. 

  


_**"Unforgettable… in every way…"**_

  


  
"Is this right?" he gently pushed Milerna aside and replaced her position above Hitomi, roughly gloved hands resting on Hitomi's cooling skin of her unmoving chest. 

  
The observing Hitomi felt a gleam of hope as she usually did with Van Fanel, and continued to watch anxiously, biting her lip with worry. 

  
"Yes that's right," Milerna instantly sensed Van's intentions, and didn't hesitate to guide him. "Push in time with your own heartbeat." 

  
'In time with my heartbeat,' the thought pounded into Van's exhausted mind. He didn't know how to perform any sort of emergency medical procedure unlike Milerna, but if it involved saving Hitomi's life, he would do it and he would succeed. 

  
His arms and body began heaving towards the sound of his heart, upwards then downward, pumping furiously as he stared his inert companion in her wide, static eyes. Each second grew onto his angst, and made him wonder if this was it… if this was it and if there wasn't any hope left… 

  
"Yes! Push harder! HARDER!" Milerna's strict demands came blaring into his left ear, but he held no resentment. She knew what she was doing, and he would have to obey. 

  
'Please don't leave me, Hitomi,' the thought was what motivated Van, and he continued on pushing as hard as he could as Milerna ordered, wishing for Hitomi to awaken, or for him to awaken and at least escape this world of trauma. 

  
"Wake up damn you!" Hitomi couldn't help but hush the words quickly as she spotted the desperate Van unfruitful so far in his attempts to resurrect her. Hitomi was touched by their care, their determination for her, a stranger; but insulted by the fact that she wasn't awakening. She was giving everyone a hard time, especially Van. Hitomi hated being trouble, especially knowing that she would live through it while nearly killing everyone else in the experience. 

  
Hitomi studied the other Hitomi carefully. There was some sort of strange message floating from her younger self. She didn't know why, but it was like the other her was not waking because she was still adrift in another world, quite like present day Hitomi was adrift in a vision. Hitomi knew that she usually tapped out whenever she rarely had visions, such as that incident with Amano and Cathy. Could that be what was happening to that younger her right now? 

  
"Breathe… _BREATHE!_" Van's heart itself was drained with fear and his mind edgy with impatience. It had been long now, too long. How much longer could Hitomi hold on anyway? How much longer until they would all know what was to become of her? 

  
Merle was burying herself in the worry of her hands, leaning close towards Allen and Shied. Her eyes refused to peel off Van and Hitomi. 

  
"Will she be okay, Van?" 

  
Van did not reply, knowing that he himself didn't know the answer and wished he did. 

  
"Hitomi, you have to wake up…" Milerna watched in dismay, losing hope with every prolonged moment. 

  
"Hitomi…" Shied hushed, adding to the commotion, holding tightly to Allen's arm. 

  
"Come on!! Just snap out of it Hitomi!!!" Van's worried voice was filled with command, frustration and panic most of all. He had been giving it his all and he couldn't come to believe losing her would be the result. It wasn't going to end this way, not on his guard, not with her, not with Hitomi. 

  
Suddenly to everyone's stunned surprise, the stationary Hitomi abruptly sat up, eyes widened, then curled over coughing and hacking endlessly. 

  
Almost as if on signal, the crowds let out an enormous breath of relief. 

  
"She's going to be okay…" Milerna confirmed, holding onto the shaking and stricken Hitomi, still trying to regain her health. 

  
Van lay back, entirely exhausted but joyful deep inside. That had been too close, but he knew it wasn't like Hitomi to cut it short. She had lived through a lot; he trusted she would live through anything as long as he was around to insure it. 

  
The watching Hitomi let out a whoop of joy, feeling a rush to go out and hug Van, embrace him with everything she had, after all, he had just managed to rescue her a second time! Hitomi had a good feeling that he had done that a lot for her, hadn't he… She couldn't believe it. Van Fanel! Van Fanel was her hero!!! 

  
But before Hitomi could see what else would come of her traumatized younger self, or Allen and the other prisoners, she felt her feet rise off the floor, and instantly she sensed her body bolting upwards away from the scene. A part of her didn't want to go, just wished to stay, but she didn't struggle to avoid anything. An image was starting to form, but the rest of the puzzle still lay scattered. 

  
_**

"And forever more… that's how you'll stay…"

**_

  
Hitomi found herself drifting once again in her usual room of black, quite comfortable with the scenario after her last quite exhilarating experience. A part of her still felt indulged with that moment, like she hadn't just been seeing it all, but rather experiencing it. She couldn't help but wonder what had happened next. 

  
The song was still drifting lightly, and Hitomi hadn't even noticed it for most of the while. This time though, Hitomi began to sing along with each line as it played for like the fiftieth time, and she couldn't help but dwell on the words a little longer. 

  
_ "Hitomi, do you remember now?"_

  
The voice, Van's voice, brought her back to her dreamy reality. She felt happy to know it was there, happy to know he was there, in her mind. ****

  
"Yes Van, I know who you are! I know Allen Sheizar, and Merle, and Prince Shied, Milerna; and I know how you saved my life again!! Did I ever thank you?" 

  
She waited anxiously for a response. 

  
_ "You never had to Hitomi. I never saved you to be thanked. I saved you because I would never stand back and allow you to be harmed. I promised myself that many times."_

  
** "Wow…"**

  
Hitomi felt quite ashamed that this Van could speak so well mannerly, while she couldn't even find words to keep up conversation. She found it a little difficult though to speak definably when she couldn't even see a thing. 

  
** "But… but… Van I _need_ to thank you! Please, let me see you. I owe so much to you."**

  
She could sense the voice, Van's voice, hesitating. 

  
_ "I'm sorry, Hitomi, but there is more for you."_

  
** "More? More? But why? What else is there?"**

  
_ "Hitomi, there is still a lot you cannot recall without being reminded. I must help you do this, until you understand."_

  
Understand? What was there for Hitomi to understand? But there wasn't any time for Hitomi to plod through these things, because as expected, she was almost immediately transferred again, to return once again to Van's world, to the world that obviously the most important part of her life had been lived in, and totally wiped off her memory. Hitomi was starting to build a newfound hate to Nathaniel Teroka. He had made her forget all this? All these moments? Life-treasuring moments surrounded by those who had really cared for her? Was it because of him and her mother that she could hardly recall anything about her other true friends of another world? 

  
It didn't seem fair to Hitomi at the time, but it had to be fair. After all, she was living her chance to remember right at that moment. She was living the opportunity to go back to that Time, to know why it was so meaningful to her, to remember. 

  
**_

"That's why… darling it's incredible…"

_**

  
In only a sliver of time, Hitomi was dazed and amazed to find herself immersed into a great, blinding light. She wheeled around in circles for a few seconds often ambushed by visions of blue and sky, then in merely moments sitting perfectly still on the fifth step up of a concrete flight of outdoor stairs. 

  
Hitomi blinked once, then twice. 

  
She was gazing blankly for a lot longer than she could count, before her mind was restored within her. Her thoughts came slapping back and the realization that she was once again in the midst of a strange and unfamiliar place came to mind. Fright was starting to build inside her body and mind again, but she forcibly pushed it out. She knew why she was here; there was no reason to be afraid. Each vision came with reason she had to understand. She needed to focus on other things, where she was, her surroundings for instance. 

  
'It's beautiful,' Hitomi finally turned her attention away from herself, to look up and beyond her. It was one of the most amazing sights Hitomi would ever come to see. She was sitting in the middle of a type of seating area with concrete flooring in the center, and an antique spout fountain adding elegance in-between it all. Up above the seating scene, she could see the many outlines and rooftops of aged, brick-layer buildings and homes with small, square, dim windows, stretching much thinner and higher than the houses she knew of her time. Out on the front of many of the structures were small shops complete with ragged lean-to awnings, sheltering many food produce and pottery items, and other ancient necessities. The street sides were nothing but yellow dirt roads, odd looking cattle and horses dragging behind large wooden carts full of barrels and crates for the many street stores. Merchants and peasants either shopped or sold, crossing through the busy roads or over the wooden bridges that lay across the many wondrous water canals beautifully lining the major streets of the city. 

  
Hitomi was marveling at it all, at it's definite difference from the world she had left behind. She knew Earth had looked once like this with the great forest backgrounds, the people with their children chatting by the alleyways and small backyards, buildings and castles that were now in her time destroyed or withered, but that had been very, very long ago. It reminded Hitomi almost of not really medieval times, but sort of like Biblical times. It looked to her as if she had gone back by two whole millenniums; into an age before complex governmental systems, before various technology and invention spurts, and almost as if long before Hitomi's greatest-grandparent's very existence. 

  
It was totally amazing, totally wondrous, this world, this world called 'Gaea'. She knew it was Gaea, the world created from the Power of Atlantis, she knew this was the very richness in which her other friends lived, the richness in which Van lived, Van Fanel himself. 

  
Hitomi had to work hard to draw her eyes away from the divine scene and catch sight of her arms, her legs, and her whole body! Holy crow! Was that ever something! Hitomi was young again! She raised her hands up in alarm and surprise feeling her smaller face, younger features, and gawking in astonishment at the Aimsa Shoreline Public High uniform she had been convinced she lost almost two years ago. It was just… 

  
'Oh my gosh, this is so weird!' It was all Hitomi could master to think as she inspected her whole self, amazed at what had changed in only near to six years. She could feel the awkwardness of her short auburn hair, which barely tickled her earlobes, the clamp, choking feeling of her seemingly extinct uniform oxford shirt, the lightness and agility of her flexible, strong and slender legs which she no longer really had in her time, and simply the strangeness of returning to a meek little fourteen-year old, an age she had definitely forgotten. Hitomi laughed out loud, this was just something! It wasn't everyday one could go back in time and relive their youth. 

  
'Oh I wish Yukari and Amano could see this,' she shook her head in disbelief continuing to constantly pat her arms and legs as if to make sure she was there, to make sure it was her in this youthful body and she was here living it, living everything in this strange world. It excited her and thrilled her so much, and she almost instinctively arched her neck upwards. 

  
Well, there was her home, far, far away. She shielded her eyes from the bright sunlight with the palm of her left hand, gazing upwards at the faint image of Earth and it's moon, not too far off in the distance, a mere speck in the daylight sky. She had often seen such an image of two moons in her dreams and previous vision, but to see it for herself sitting amidst the clouds and cotton candy blue of the Gaean skies was quite outstanding. Everything was! Everything was outstanding! 

  
As she wiped the sweat off her brow (the weather was much warmer than she would have come to expect from a vision) Hitomi thought maybe it would be interesting if she got up and explored a little bit. Maybe that was what Van wanted her to do in this vision; to go and find him and discover the truth, to 'understand' as he wanted her to. 

  
Hitomi was enthralled at the idea of finding that Van, of finding her hero and allowing her own self, just her, to go and talk to him, one-to-one, where she could see him, hear him, feel him, touch him. She began to run through in her mind all that she would say to him- 

  
Hitomi froze. 

  
Hitomi froze even before she could stand, even before she could first think of where to go. She knew in a second she wasn't going to go anywhere. She was going to stay _here_. 

  
'Why would I stay here?' 

  
The thought bothered her, why had she just been impelled to stay put? She did want to go and explore, so what was with this little edging sense in her mind to stay where she was? 

  
'Stay here.' 

  
She could feel herself commanding herself to remain where she was, to block off any exploration wants and to stay here, in the burning sun without anyone she knew in sight, and without Van. But why? Why was she feeling this inside? What was going on? 

  
Didn't she want to go find Van and the others? Didn't she want to find out where she was, and what was happening, and more about the Time? 

  
The confusion was seriously starting to scare her quite a bit, wondering why her own body and mind were in a state of debate. It was like commanding your arm to move, yet growing an argument against another part of you, which did not want the arm to move. That wasn't possible was it? To actually feel your own personality lost in decision? It couldn't be, not unless you had a split personality or something just like the people in the cracker-houses… Hitomi didn't think she was crazy, and no she was not in denial. She was in this vision after all; this vision proved she wasn't crazy! It proved that those things she had said about that Time were true! It was true; she was here! But what about that second intuition she was having… did that prove she was crazy? Why did she have two senses at once? It couldn't have been normal! 

  
'Oh… geeze… I'm losing it…' Hitomi furrowed her head in her hands, trying to will herself to stand but still that something held her back. Something was pulling her, teasing her and commanding her to stay where she was. She didn't see why, she didn't see any threatening consequences of doing a little exploration but yet she did just as she was told. There was something stronger at work here. 

  
Before Hitomi could try for a second time to get herself up and take a look around, an even worse feeling than repression came at hand: remorse. Hitomi couldn't believe it. Just what was going on inside of her? She was feeling guilty! It was so true! A strange, awkward sensation was now bounding her back from even thinking straight, setting a heavy burden upon her chest of which she didn't know what. Why? Why was she feeling ashamed of something she didn't even know what was? It wasn't making any sense at all? What kind of vision was this…some sort of mental game? 

  
The feeling grew stronger, made Hitomi's stomach twist and churn in despair. A feeling of mortification to herself began to grow, and she could sense a daunting thought in her mind. What had Hitomi done wrong? What? She felt she knew something, something horrid that needed to be told, but she was keeping it all to herself. 

  
Wait a minute, Hitomi thought suddenly. 

  
Maybe _this_ was it. This was yet another level Van wanted her to understand. Maybe while she was in the Time there had been something she had been guilty of, that had held her back and made her hate herself inside. That was sure how Hitomi felt now, totally disgraced, but of what? Just what could be making her feel so down? What secret did Hitomi know, or once know, that was so important for her to understand? 

  
Hitomi sat in absorption of thought and sunlight, scanning through her thoughts and memories but constantly coming up blank. There was still that feeling though, that heavy, damp feeling of fault that was prying at her mind. Hitomi would not be able to think straight, to function clearly without passing this sort of test. She had to, just absolutely had to, figure out what was eating at her well-being. Something was, she had done something and it was all a matter of finding out what. An upside-down smile scrawled across her dismayed face. 

  
"Hitomi…" 

  
Startled Hitomi's seemingly two minds unfocused then refocused on someone who had called to her. She hadn't even seen him come, he was standing merely five feet or so away on the hot concrete, standing casually leaning a bit on his left knee and holding onto a small, burlap sack. 

  
"Oh my gosh, VAN!" The words barely fumbled out of Hitomi's mouth. She was astounded! It was Van Fanel, talking to her at last!! It couldn't be!! She didn't need to find him; he had found her! But why… again that question: Why? Why had she just said 'oh my gosh, van' in a low, barely audible mumble? Hitomi had meant to scream that out with fistfuls of joy, running over to hug him in triumph to get her wishes granted on meeting him at last, but instead she sounded as down as that blue donkey in Winnie the Pooh. It was that depression wasn't it? It now held her whole body victim. Hitomi knew that she wasn't smiling. She wanted to smile, longed to smile, but she knew she wasn't, her mouth probably stretched in a thin, firm, unappealing line. That was no way to act around Van, but she couldn't help it! The depression was beginning to sink further and root into her outside actions, not just mentally but physically as well! Her excited, happy self was being held prison in this unknown mopey state of being. 

  
Obviously she was not the only one who noticed. 

  
"Hey, what's wrong?" The wondrous Van cocked his head sideways, giving her a surprising friendly glance and moving a step closer. 

  
Hitomi hesitated to respond, eyeing this mysterious figure up close for the first time. Clearly now she could examine those familiar, chestnut eyes she had looked into many times before. That time in her vision, when he had cried out for her, he had looked exactly the same way, so youthful, adventurous, rugged and tough to the bone. His voice showed authority, his presence: power. He had those most adorable eyes hidden behind those black bangs, deep black bangs she remembered seeing dotted with snowflakes that night back in March, back in Gore Park. That long and lanky figure of his was the exact replica of the man she knew in all her heart she had met that night, knowing in her own sixth sense that that man was the future image of this boy before her, dressed in his stringy red top and cropped beige pants, sword ever daunting by his side. 

  
"Oh Van…" Hitomi's voice came out mixed with both admiration and despair, at least half of it this time coming out the way she wanted. She wanted to answer his question, to tell him what was wrong but she didn't even know! She just didn't understand! 

  
Hitomi gasped in girly surprise as Van stepped over to where she was and plopped himself down beside her. Hitomi instantly felt her throat swell in nervousness and of course in that bothersome guilt, but mostly in awe of having to sit beside this oddly prestige figure. This Van Fanel, she felt so intimidated by him! She knew for one thing, he was her friend (obviously by his concern), she knew he was her sort of hero-guy after rescuing her enough times already, she knew he was somewhat like an angel in disguise, but she had this other strong feeling towards him. An infatuated, girlish attraction like the kind teenage gals would often have on the star football player on a high school team. It was amazing yet uncomforting to Hitomi, seeing as, hello, she was going to be married in 24 days now and counting, and this was the first time in nearly three years she had felt attracted to another man aside from Amano. And what was worse, Van wasn't really a man all right now, not like in Gore Park. Here he was still young; he was still fourteen Earth years old. And even though technically she was fourteen in her vision state of being, it was still awkward to feel such a drawing to what seemed at the moment like a younger guy. 

  
He stared forward for a few moments, and then returned her glance. Hitomi blushed horribly just like back in March, when Van had caught her glaring at him. 

  
"I've just been out doing some errands," he rested the burlap sack onto his lap. "What have you been up to, Hitomi?" Oh his voice was so smooth, so silky and handsome all by itself. 

  
"I-" Hitomi's mind was trailing with thoughts and excuses as she tried feverishly to put aside her guilt infested feelings. She needed to think straight and this unnecessary depression was exhausting her. She looked down to her running shoes (which she didn't even know she had back when she was younger) thoughts and words getting awfully scrambled and mixed in her mind. That frown returned again to Hitomi's confused image. 

  
Van's eyebrows knitted with concern to see his usually intuitive friend in such a gloomy position. He hadn't seen her so down before, and so unwilling to speak with him. He felt curious and compassionate all at the same time. 

  
"Oh nothing I guess," Hitomi smiled inside in triumph as she finally mastered to respond in her restless series of thoughts. This was more than triple the amount of thinking one had to do to respond to such an easy question, but nonetheless, she felt proud to have accomplished at least that much. 

  
Allen. 

  
The word, or more so, the name, popped strangely into Hitomi's mind out of the blue. It was accompanied by a feeling, an emotion towards it, or towards the person, of a selfish sort of care… she didn't understand it. Was this the guilt? Was it about Allen? Was she finally receiving another hint here? But what about Allen… 

  
Van sighed, feeling if he didn't do something, Hitomi's mood would become contagious. He stood and embraced the glorious sunrays, then looked on back down to his remorseful companion. 

  
"Hey, Hitomi look, if it'll make you feel any better rather than being out here by yourself, come with me to my windmill by the edge of Palas, it isn't too far from here," he gave her a last cheering smile and hopped on down, already making his way to the sandy pathways through the pastures. He figured if he got a head start and left her behind, it would make Hitomi antsy to follow along. 

  
She gave an alarmed glance to see Van quickly arise and practically disappear out of her sight as quickly as he had come. Hitomi was almost instinctively instructed to go and follow rather than to lose her chance to speak with him, and for the first time, her second self allowed her to get up and go. Feeling the rush of her young, exuberant body she galloped along until she was halfway down a meadow easily keeping up with his brisk pace. 

  
Van gave a small, sideways smile, which was hard to notice if one didn't pay good attention. But Hitomi had seen it and felt a secret sense of pride as she walked alongside. Actually, she was sulking alongside in that moody state but inside, aside from the mysterious Allen guilt, she still felt on top of the world. 

  
"What's at the mill, Van?" Wow! Hitomi was actually making conversation! She was beginning to wonder if she was finally beginning to overpower that pestering force within her. 

  
Van, relieved to sense her willing to speak this time, nodded his head as he skipped over a few large stones in their path. 

  
"Escaflowne. I had to store it there rather than at the Palace. I figure it'd be too much trouble for Milerna's family if I were to endanger them with Escaflowne around. At least if it's all the way out at the windmill, it's a smaller threat to those in the town. Besides, my father used to store it there as well. It makes easier access, and Zaibach would have a hard time locating it.." 

  
Hitomi nodded in response, the only reply she could get out of her feuding persona. She could already spot the tips of the large mill-fan barely inching in the soft breeze. She remembered the machines in her first vision a while ago. Her hunches alerted her that that magnificent technological wonder was what Van called 'Escaflowne'. She also had an odd knowing that Escaflowne was a large part of Van's life, as it was hers. Why? Once again, she really didn't know. 

  
Allen. 

  
Milerna. 

  
Wedding. 

  
The thoughts jarred hopelessly into Hitomi's already confounded thoughts. That guilt… it had something to do with Allen and Milerna, and a wedding? It made little sense to her. Allen… the knight, the one whom she had strange feelings towards, then there was Milerna, Princess Milerna as she recalled, who had been experienced in medicine and had tried to save her… and a wedding? A wedding? Her wedding? No, it couldn't be, this was way before Hitomi and Amano were serious enough to even be considering marriage. But then where was the link between the three? And even if they did share any common bond, how could that make her feel miserable? 

  
Hitomi began to puzzle over it again as Van pushed a large, barn-like door to the side as it rolled on its hinges. Hitomi peered into the looming darkness, slightly lit by the sunlight peeking through the window in the roof. She could make out the silhouettes of many crow or pigeon looking birds casting their larger shadows on the hay-filled, mill floor, right by where the monstrous Escaflowne sat in solitude. Hitomi had to brace herself at the sight of the thing, at the gigantic contraption complete with such an intricate design to put a jet fighter to shame, and at its immensity and obvious power. She could easily picture Van within it, managing that beast of a machine to flow graciously as the muscles in his body. It amazed her so at the thought. 

  
"I'm just going to get some of Escaflowne's tools, you can go sit up there if you want, just don't disturb Escaflowne," he gave her a slight grin which Hitomi knew that he rarely did, then disappeared behind a loft of hay. 

  
Hitomi gave a depressing sigh, wishing she could talk to him freely as she wanted to, wishing she wasn't so oppressed by her strange intuitions. She looked on high up above her where a second level was, coated with haystacks and a narrow, wooden ladder leaning up against it. She gave yet another sigh, then a frown, figuring she'd have to find her way up there somehow. She very well couldn't just stay down here all day. 

  
After managing the nerve-hassling climb up, Hitomi rested herself amongst the yellow twigs and leaned against the coolness of the mill walls, glancing at the intimidating Escaflowne up front of her. She made it her business not to get too close, feeling highly unfamiliar and pretty scared of the humongous robot machine. It reminded her of those little Power Ranger robot figures all the little kids used to play with when she was much younger. The difference was this thing was not made of plastic; it could kill you more than you could kill it, and she was sure Bandai didn't endorse it. 

  
Allen. 

  
Milerna. 

  
Together. 

  
Wedding. 

  
Wrong. 

  
Cards. 

  
Right. 

  
Huh? Hitomi quickly sorted through all of the quick thoughts that had came once again from nowhere, frowning at it's complication. Allen and Milerna, together. She figured that much. A strong, selfish feeling came to her when she thought of that. Allen and Milerna… yes there it was again! It felt selfish, but yet again it made her sad… so sad and depressed to think of the two… together. Hitomi recalled Allen easily, remembering those strange feelings towards him, weak yet persistent. She remembered how easily he resembled Amano, uncanny with their eyes and facial features. She knew then that she didn't want Allen and Milerna together, was that why their wedding was wrong? 

  
Hitomi turned in surprise to see Van returning back down beneath her, glancing up at her, then sorting through many different abstract weapon-looking tools below. Hitomi watched semi-interested, thinking more of her newest puzzle to figure out. 

  
All right, so now she knew why she felt sad. It had to do with the relationship between Allen and Milerna. She didn't want to see the two together because she had some sort of thing for Allen. But a great part of her told her that those two weren't the ones getting married, in fact they were the ones that should be getting married. So what was this about a wedding? Between who? She had a feeling it was one of them… one of them was to be married… but which one and to whom? 

  
Allen or Milerna… it couldn't have been Allen. She remembered him, she remembered him looking at Milerna in the last vision… in a different way than he looked at everyone else. Milerna had returned the same look, but still Hitomi was convinced it was Milerna that was in the wrong marriage. It had to be, she just knew it, Milerna was marrying someone else, not Allen. 

  
Then what about the guilt? Cards… her tarot cards? Could that be it? Her tarot cards were right? But about what? Allen and Milerna…. Well… if Allen and Milerna were meant to be together, then of course the cards would be right about that… 

  
Then, nearly instantly, Hitomi got it. She let out a sigh of relief and victory. 

  
"I can't believe this," she meant to scream it with joy but once again it came out as a sorrowful mutter. 

  
Van quit rearranging his sharpening items and looked on up to where the desolate Hitomi sat. He still hadn't quite figured out what he would say to her, but it looked like she was making the first step. 

  
She glanced down towards Van, who stared back with a look of curiosity and concern. 

  
"I know Allen and Milerna aren't meant to be, I can't believe I lied! I did a stupid reading for Milerna and I told her she's supposed to marry… marry… um… Dryden! Yes Dryden, when the cards didn't even say that. Now I know both her and Allen will be miserable and it's all my fault. I make myself sick," She slouched further back into a realm of self-pity. 

  
Van winced at the thought that Hitomi was sad because of that Allen again, but she did have solid reasons to be feeling down. He was concerned though for her surprising abundance of self-hatred, he found it too harsh for her, "You make yourself sick??" 

  
Hitomi bobbed her head in depressive agreement, "I'm such a jerk. I play nice but I butt into everyone's business. I'm such an idiot." 

  
Van furrowed his brows in contemplation at all of her crude marks about her own self. He sure wasn't fond of Hitomi acting this way… she was so quiet! She had been so silent and lost this whole time, it made Van feel uneasy and awkward in a way he usually never felt. Van wasn't quite sure how to go around and act about it. He pulled back a strip of black hair past his view, and then rummaged through his burlap sack from the grocery stand. 

  
Hitomi's eyes widened in surprise as she barely managed to catch a flying fruit that landed in her hands. She glanced back down to see Van smiling up at her, heading up the ladder, holding onto a few tools and another duplicate fruit in his arms. 

  
Hitomi glared at the rough-textured yellowish thing, which to her looked kind of like an overgrown pear mixed with banana genes. She really didn't know what to make of it, and simply observed Van as he handed her a baboon straw, then prepared his. 

  
She mimicked his actions, cracking open the top narrow part of the tear-shape thing watching the oozing, orange juicy slime leak around her fingers. Wiping the sticky stuff off on her kilt, she stuck in the straw and took a careful sip. 

  
"Ugh they're sour!" She felt her face recoil in a funny manner, relieving her of some of her guilt impressions and leaving her feeling like she had bit down on a fresh, peeled and plump lemon. "What are these?" 

  
"They're piscus," Van replied casually, sipping onto his, secretly amused at the funny impression on her face. "Do you feel any better now?" 

  
Hitomi scrounged up her face then turned in the other direction so that Van didn't see her look of displeasure. The name of the fruit was just about as unappealing as the taste. On a blistering day like this one iced-cappuccino would be nice… 

  
"If you go around with that nervous look on your face something bad is going to happen," Van continued on, moving back to his last sharpened section of Escaflowne's large sword and scratching the steel file against it, yet never making eye contact with Hitomi. "It's certainly not like you to be depressed now is it?" 

  
'He's trying to make me feel better…' 

  
Hitomi put the fruit aside on her lap for a second, trying to analyze things. For some reason she was surprised Van was talking to her in such a manner. Her guilty sensations were practically gone, and gave her more leeway to think. She felt that Van was that secretive type, wouldn't be so expressing of emotion. She considered herself lucky at the time that he would even be trying to comfort her. 

  
"Hitomi," Van started on the other issue at hand deciding it was worth the try. "I'd like you to stay with me stay with me… from now on that is." 

  
The words had made their way out of his mouth, and he didn't hold them back. He knew he meant them. He needed Hitomi. Still, he kept his eyes away from her, embedded into the shimmering slab of steel before him. 

  
"But Van…" Hitomi was at a loss for words. What was she supposed to say to that? Why would Van wish for her to stay with him? Obviously she never did, but still why? Maybe he… Maybe he also… 

  
Her eyes widened with wonder, and she could feel her heart rate liven and her chest heave. What was going to happen? Was this that crucial part of her vision, between her and Van, all alone? What would he tell her? 

  
Van grimaced for a second, then set the file aside, finally staring at Hitomi eye-to-eye. 

  
Hitomi stared back, facing those young, avid eyes of a fighter, waiting, anxiously, impatiently… 

  
"I WANT YOU!" The words pierced to her from Van's mouth himself. 

  
What was left of Hitomi's piscus slid from her grip and splattered against the mill floor. Her jaw was left hanging in anticipation and apprehension, unknowing of the situation. Was this what Van wanted to tell her? Was this what he wanted her to understand? 

  
_"Van, what is it???"_

  
"I want your power!" 

  
Ouch. 

  
The words jerked Hitomi so totally off course she nearly collapsed off the second level of the mill, hardly keeping balance. What the hell was this all about? He wanted to tell her that? Her power? Why would he say such a stupid thing like that?? **_Her POWER?!?!_**

  
"Let's go destroy Zaibach together," Van continued to insist, continued on with his plan as he edged closer to the appalled Hitomi. "To defeat them I'm going to need your power, the power of Atlantis! With that Escaflowne may be able to do more incredible things… Hitomi please, I need your help!" 

  
Hitomi stood there stunned, much too stunned for words. Her power? HER POWER? She couldn't get the driving thought out of her head. HER STUPID POWER?! Here she was thinking this kid was some sort of guardian angel hero thing, and all she's good for is 'her power'???? Her power? What the hell was Van thinking? Too much piscus getting to his stupid head! Hitomi had a very hard time containing her anger, keeping herself from exploding, at least verbally… 

  
**SLAP!!!**

  
The sound echoed in the massive mill walls, vibrating all around until the flocks of pigeon birds flapped quickly from sight at the surprise of the noise. 

  
Van staggered backwards unexpectedly, hand reaching to his blistered left cheek where a large red sore began to appear. It burned like fire and stung like darts, the pain was immense! He grimaced and tried to hold back from screaming in vulgar curses. He would've never expected Hitomi to do that, much less to do it with so much strength! He squinted at her, seeing her angry and flushed face, knowing that she was still very upset. 

  
What had he done? Did Van say something or other than had offended her? What could he have possibly said that would make her hit him like that? All he wanted was for her to stay with him so that they could bring peace to Gaea… was that so much to ask? 

  
Van watched helplessly as the young girl practically leaped off the second level and listened to the large creaking of the mill door, then the violent slam that accompanied it. Her anger was pretty apparent. Van didn't really know what to think as he proceeded to sharpen Escaflowne trying not to pay his pain any mind. What was he to do with Hitomi? He just couldn't figure her out! Sometimes she could be so placid and kind, and then other days she was just eccentric or Allen-obsessed. Obviously now she was just over-reacting or super-sensitive or something. Van never really had to deal with such awkward situations, his only really close female friend being Merle. But Merle was different, much different, she was just so loyal, so Merle. Not to say that she never got in fits with Van, but she hardly ever held a grudge, much less go out and hit him! 

  
Van sighed knowing that there was an apparent difference of girls of his kind, or at least girls from the Mystic Moon. It wasn't like him to pay the opposite sex much mind, being much too busy and too mature to think of silly boyish things like crushes or infatuations, after all, he was a King of a vanished city. But nonetheless, Van was as semi-human as could be, and he often had the natural feelings of a human. To him, Hitomi was a very unique girl unlike any villager woman or princess that he had ever met; she was so… just so much more special than them. It didn't matter to him that she was from an entirely different world, and maybe even a different species; she was still Hitomi Kanzaki. Ever since they had first met (what seemed like a while ago now) he had a particular drawing to her. Maybe it was her exquisite mental abilities, or her courage at critical times. Whatever it was, he also felt that it was not just his right, but also his responsibility to care for her and to promise himself that he would get her home safely. 

  
Many times, Van would wonder why he would even to go through bothersome trouble of getting her back to the Mystic Moon, or watching her back all the time. It's not like she was family or anything, and he really hadn't known her all that long. But still, he had that strange instinct to guard her, be there for her. Sometimes Allen was the same, but he knew Allen, no matter what Hitomi thought, didn't understand her as well as he did. So what if Allen is a stupid knight and all gentlemen like, Van had saved her many more times plus he didn't do it for show, he did because he had to. And in return, Hitomi had saved him from many serious situations as well. If it weren't for her many times, Van probably wouldn't have been sitting here at the moment. 

  
Van's head instantly jerked upwards, his eyes peeking through the slightly ajar mill door. He could see the many rich prairies up ahead, also spotting clouds overcast. It wouldn't be long before a storm… He looked on, eyes sweeping the small expanse of land that he could see, searching, longing for a figure… looking for that girl lost in this strange world, but sadly Hitomi was nowhere in sight. 

  


* * *

  
"What a jerk…" 

  
Hitomi uselessly observed the ripples of water dapple slightly in circles as the rock she had thrown sunk deep below the stream. She leaned herself against the wooden fencing of one of the many small bridges that crossed across the waters, growing longer and longer the further she went as the mouth of the river widened. 

  
Small, spits of water began to tickle all over her, and she knew by the gray skies blocking out what had been left of the sun, that it was going to rain, and here Hitomi was in the middle of nowhere. 

  
She had been traveling through the beautiful Gaean countryside for a while now, but too absorbed in thought to fully enjoy the scenery. She couldn't help but feel so insulted, so _used_ by Van. The thought never left her, and even though she didn't truly understand why she was acting so angrily, she didn't fight it off either. It was what her emotions were feeling, so that was that. She could still picture him, kindly handing her that piscus and talking with her, trying to make her feel better about herself when she had felt so down. But still, even as she thought of those noble acts she couldn't ignore those feelings of anger and disappointment. She had been expecting so much more from Van than this. Was this what he wanted to tell her? Wanted her to understand? That all she was good for was a psychological pawn in his game of war? 

  
Hitomi knew it wasn't true, but she couldn't help but sadly dwell on the thought. When would she wake up anyway? When could she return back to her small, comforting home, to Cathy's delicious breakfasts, and Amano's wonderful smile… why did she have to go through all this anyway? Couldn't she just understand whatever there was to understand? 

  
Hitomi made her way back to land and walked aimlessly upon a stony pathway heading back to the walls of Palas. The rain came down in sheets now cooling the atmosphere, sweet smelling rain, which soaked her through and through though she barely paid it mind. The worst was only feeling her clothes growing heavier, and her hair grow slick and dirty with rainwater. What was a little downpour to hurt now after all that she'd been through? There was a lot worse suffering than merely getting a little wet. 

  
The view before her grew bleak as the water came down in torrents, blurring what she could see, making everything stick to her: clothes, socks, hair… just like the spring weather of Aimsa, her home which she was now beginning to miss. This dream, this vision, had been going on for an awfully long length now. Wasn't it ever going to end? Wasn't her alarm clock going to go off anytime soon? Shouldn't it? Or maybe this wasn't a vision at all, maybe all the realistic happenings around her were only realistic because they _were_ realistic, she was really _here_. 

  
"Where in the world am I?" she couldn't help to think it to herself, smudging her wet hands beneath her soaked uniform pockets. Nothing at all looked familiar, all of it, her surroundings were entirely foreign and alien to her. It didn't help that the stormy weather had now reached it's full peak, making her shiver in the once warm conditions, and blink the water away from her eyes. 

  
"Oh no… I can't see a thing," she squinted to make out the blurry structures up ahead. There was the large wall surrounding the village, or city, of Palas, and the last bridge of the many only a few more steps away. 

  
"I have to get back soon…" Hitomi thought harder about her last notion. "Back where? Back to whom?" 

  
Well, it had to be back to somebody, and soon. She very well couldn't stay here for much longer; it couldn't be very safe in this world she didn't know. If only there was someone who could help her, someone she could turn to, but whom? Just who could care for Hitomi in this place she didn't know? Surprisingly, Hitomi couldn't think of any one, no one at all. 

  


* * *

  
"Where are you going Lord Van??" Merle stubbornly watched as Van began opening the massive door of the mill. She had just arrived after all, seeking shelter from the rain in search for him, and now he was totally leaving her again. 

  
"I have to find Hitomi," Van didn't hesitate to turn back to his companion, allowing the water to seep into the interior of the mill, and making his way down the soaked hillsides back to the Palas pathways beneath the property walls. He wasn't too sure if he would find Hitomi there, but it was definitely worth the try. There was no way Van would leave her out in the midst of Gaea all alone in this horrid weather. He wouldn't have minded as much if Milerna, Allen or even Merle was with her, but they weren't. He didn't care if Hitomi was mad at him or not, he was going to find her; it was his instinct that drove him to do it. 

  
Merle's face glowed with jealousy and annoyance. Hitomi, Hitomi, Hitomi, yadda, yadda, yadda, was that all that she would ever hear? It obviously looked like it was all that drummed through Lord Van's head! She grumpily watched him disappear into the shower of water, himself not paying any mind to the fact that he was now entirely drenched. 

  
"Oh just let her go!" She hissed angrily after him. "You'll catch a cold!" 

  
But Van didn't listen to any of Merle's sobbing cries or warnings. His mind was one-tracked now, as it usually was. Find Hitomi. There was his mission, and now he was going to accomplish it. 

  


* * *

  
"What am I doing?" Hitomi kicked again at a stubborn stone embedded into the mud. "When did I get used to life here? When did I start to like the people here? It's hard to remember home… I miss you Amano." 

  
Half of what Hitomi had just thought to herself was true; she did miss Amano, quite a lot in this strange situation. She didn't like the dirty attachment to anyone besides him, and it was hard to refocus on her wedding. Why was she so concerned with anyone else? She was not going to marry any of these fairy-tale persons, so why did she even bother caring so much? And what did Hitomi mean about 'getting used to life here'? It was like her thoughts were coming to her from the past, because Hitomi knew very well that she wasn't used to life here, so why did her mind just think in that way? Hitomi knew it had to be her split personality once again, butting into her natural thoughts and making her two different entities in one: Hitomi of the present and Hitomi of the Time. She found it excruciating trying to differentiate from the two. Whenever she thought things, she tried to figure out which part of her was thinking it, but it was too hard to tell. Sometimes, she simply just allowed blending the two personas together; it was just her and herself in this creepy planet far from home. 

  
Hitomi continued walking amidst her newfound depression, glancing up at the last bridge in the series up ahead. Through the sweltering drizzle she could see the many surrounding buildings, which had taken the place of the forest and hillsides that had last been in view. 

  
Wait a minute. 

  
There was something else… 

  
Hitomi had to look very hard to make out the drab figure up ahead, on the other side of the long, stilted bridge. She couldn't see very well, and it was hard to hear over the sounds of raindrops falling across rooftops, treetops, and splashing against the surface of the now rampant river down below. Still, she was enveloped in curiosity, wondering whom else but her would wander alone down these areas at a time like this. 

  
It was a man; it was definitely a man, which Hitomi could make out vaguely in the weather. He was rather tall and looked like her age, her sentimental age, which would've been in his early twenties or so. He was dressed in a soaked white blouse, and in tight black slacks with some sort of thick, violet strap around his waist. He too, like Van, had a sword hanging off its belt by his left leg for who knows what purpose. What was different though was definitely his appearance, recognizable with that long… blonde… hair… 

  
Allen. Mr. Allen Sheizar. 

  
It obviously occurred to Hitomi after a few moments of ogling him. It was Allen after all, just like her, soaked through and through in the weather. Also like her, he shared the same impression of dismay and loneliness. Hitomi remembered why suddenly, recalling the wedding, Milerna's wedding… Allen had to be heartbroken! She watched him with sympathy as they both made their way across the sturdy, creaking bridge, meeting right in the center as they were hit by ambushes of raindrops out in the open. 

  
"A-Allen," It was all that Hitomi could make out at the moment. She remembered that strange feeling that she had towards him, and boy was it ever strong now. He just…. he just reminded her so much of Amano! That look, those eyes, it was like staring straight at her fiancé in another world, in another time, almost like the two of them in a totally different dimension! The Amano and Hitomi of Gaea… 

  
"Hitomi…" 

  
She stirred suddenly in response as she felt his heavy hand lie upon her left shoulder. It was like Amano's hand, when he was with her, always making sure she was close. It came with a strange sense of comfort, and affection. But wait, this, _this_ was not Amano now was it… This wasn't her fiancé! 

  
Hitomi flinched in uneasiness at the thought, the knowing that this Allen wasn't really the one she was going to marry either, not really the one she loved, he was as much of a stranger as everyone else, so how could she trust him, touching her like that, when she barely knew who he was? 

  
"Why is it… why is it that when I'm with you my heart is at peace?" 

  
Allen's words enthused at her thoughts, but she didn't think of it much as he drew her in, closer and closer, and soon enough, the young Hitomi was engulfed in his arms, protected from the surge of the weather. It felt so secure, so amazing, so familiar… 

  
'He's warm,' she noticed instantly, feeling herself feeling drawn to his body, cowering closer to him, to his warmth, to his gentle embrace. Her worldly thoughts were at a loss now, totally forgetting where she was or what her surroundings were like, she had lost all interest in anything but him, this man. She was immersed into Allen's very well being. 

  
'He smells like Amano…'She closed her eyes, nuzzling her head into his chest, listening to his strong and pounding heart as she did time after time with Amano, ringing over the worldly noises. Was this not Amano? It felt like him, looked like him, even smelt like him… those handsome eyes and caring arms, how could she be wrong? 

  
Suddenly Hitomi's eyes flashed open and she jerked her body back suddenly. She shook her head abruptly, raindrops slipping off the tips of her hair as she backed away cautiously. She looked at him, that person, maybe Allen, maybe Amano, but nonetheless still getting flooded with many insistent images. Images of that Milerna were strongly coming back to Hitomi, rushing at her with enough impact to knock her off her feet if it wanted. She felt the instant coldness without his embrace, without the heat radiating from him, the drench of the falling rain was running through her, but she couldn't find it in herself to return to those arms, not now, not knowing about Milerna… knowing the guilt that would come in her actions if she were only to stay here with this man… 

  
"Why?" Allen's hurt image struck her about as much, as he watched her panicked actions, startled by her pushing him away so intently. 

  
"It's just that I know how Milerna feels about you!" 

  
Hitomi felt stuck as she confessed the words out to his dazed image, she wanted to be with him, in those arms again, but she knew she couldn't!!! This was not Amano! No, it wasn't! It was someone else, it was Allen Sheizar, and Allen did not belong to her. He belonged to Milerna, and Hitomi knew very well she could not stand in their way. Why was she feeling like this anyway? Why did she long so much to return to his embrace? She didn't know him; she shouldn't be feeling anything! How could she do this to her true lover, Amano? And more so, how could she do this to Van? 

  
Allen smiled, a strange smile almost as if he didn't know what he was saying, "All I see is you Hitomi, just you." 

  
Hitomi shook her head in doubt. He wasn't making any sense! He loved Milerna didn't he? She had felt it! She knew Milerna and Allen cared for each other on such an amazing level, but why was he saying these things? Was he too, lost in depression? Was that what was wrong with the two of them? They were too saddened by their pitiful selves that they fell into each other? 

  
"What are you saying?" She gave Allen a look of despair, aware that this was all wrong! Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! Wasn't this eating at him as well? Scarring his ethics? Didn't the thought of Milerna bother him in the least bit? Hitomi knew it bothered her very much so, just like another guilty pressure being applied… she felt she was betraying someone. She felt that she was doing the one thing that she should never do by falling victim to Allen's romantic lure. Oh Amano… he was always so good to her… but… but… Hitomi felt it wasn't Amano! Wait a minute; she _wasn't_ betraying Amano now was she? She actually felt that Allen, this Allen _was_ Amano! So if Allen and Amano were one and the same, whom else was she betraying? Who? 

  
"Hitomi…" it was the last word out of Allen's mouth as he slowly began to lean over, eyes blinking shut in the scurry of the rain. He knew what he was to do, it raged at him like natural instinct, he was inclined to do this whether he liked it or not. 

  
Hitomi felt a sudden lump grow rapidly in her throat, chest heaving once again in nervousness as his swooning image came closer, as he bent towards her; face merely inches away… She knew that her heart was angrily pounding in the nimble walls of her chest, for she could hear it, over the rain, over the noise, she knew how mixed her emotions were. Her stomach churned sickly, her palms sweated mixing to the raindrops. This wasn't right… this wasn't right but there was no stopping it… 

  
She stood still, chin slightly tilted upwards as Allen lay his tender lips upon hers, held her towards him with those authoritative arms. The world as if struck Hitomi that very second their lips conjoined ever sweetly, yet the brilliant lightening rays cut through the murky sky, thunderous jolts riveting through her body. She could feel the world cry out at her, sending the last few raindrops lashing at her face, spitting at her in shame. Hitomi's heart hung as if strangled, robbed of whatever it had had left. There had been no avoiding fate, no matter how she despised it; it had been only bound to happen. Hitomi knew that, but she didn't care. She couldn't care. She blamed herself, she blamed her miserable self; she could've gotten away if she had wanted… she could've made the difference. But it was too late, Hitomi didn't, and even as their lips parted, the storm settled, and the sunrays danced upon their two lonesome figures, Hitomi knew she could never live it down. What from a distance may have seemed like just a kiss was actually a burden that Hitomi knew she held. It was a symbol to her, that wronged kiss was a symbol of something else… something deeper that was wrong… something Hitomi didn't understand… something Hitomi knew she had to understand, she was here to understand! 

  
"Hitomi…" Allen smiled back at her, the few moisture droplets trickling down his long bangs shimmering in the dusk. 

  
Hitomi failed to return that smile, and sighed resentfully. That feeling that hanging repressing feeling was real now. It wasn't felt by a part of her, it wasn't felt by her subconscious or split personality, but instead, it was felt by her as a whole, as one persona suffering from her own guilt and wrong-doings. Hitomi was one again, one again with herself hating herself as one. It didn't matter to Hitomi that she was in a vision, that this was simply a place of her mind, she knew very well that this had happened. It didn't make a difference that it was six years ago, no difference at all. What had happened now also happened in her present time… but how? She was obviously yet to understand her newest and harshest emotion yet. 

  
"Ugh Allen, I don't know," finally her sad words replied, stepping back from him on the drying bridge side, blinking her eyes moist with not just rainwater. Hitomi hardly understood why she felt such a feeling of misery because of Allen, but she was soon to figure it out. 

  
Hitomi and Allen's eyes both wandered upwards at the very same moment. At the same instant Hitomi knew in a dreadful realization that they were not the only ones who had been wandering in the rain. She knew now why her pain was so great, why she had felt such shame towards her actions. All this time… Hitomi had known she wasn't the only one who had witnessed her mistake; he had been there. Van had been there. 

  
Hitomi stood in absolute desolation, her drying bangs falling lightly in her view. It didn't block him out though, and nothing could block out the awful feeling writhing through her dismayed self. She felt her eyes blur over instantly and her heart puncture in a way she knew it never had before. It was not the pain of losing someone you love, it was not the pain of betraying someone you love, but it was the pain of betraying someone you knew not you loved and who had loved you in return. It was this pain that froze Hitomi in a state of disbelief trying to will it all way, trying to convince herself it wasn't real… it couldn't have been. 

  
But it was. 

  
There he stood, merely a few feet away at her end of the bridge, the rainwater having soaked him entirely through. His eyes were expressionless, and unbelieving. The sunlight bathed upon him, yet his soul remained troubled and broken. His breathing was slow, and uneven, trying not to believe… he just couldn't believe…A few weaseling droplets fell from his bangs to his face, trickling down his cheek which could have been as easily tears that he wished to hide. Van hadn't believed his eyes, but he knew inside, he knew inside that this was not a figment of cruelty. It was true… she had been… 

  
'Oh my God…' the thought stung Hitomi's mind as did the forming tears. 'He was in the rain all this time… he was looking for _me_...' 

  
The thought surged through Hitomi accompanied by barrelfuls of unending guilt, throbbing guilt, which nearly had Hitomi throwing herself down into the deep river below connecting towards the vast of the ocean, telling herself never to return, vowing never to return. But instead, just by nature, she reached her hand out… and tried… 

  
"Van! Wait……." 

  
But Hitomi was too late. Van could not take any more, and he doubted that he could ever look her in the eye again. The sad image of Van lay embedded in the moment, as he briskly turned and ran the other way, he ran as fast as he could from the truth he didn't want to see any longer, he didn't want a part of anymore. 

  
Hitomi watched him leave her, the hurt burning in her like the colours of the sunset, always beyond her grasp. She was such a fool, a dim-witted fool. She knew what Van felt, she knew what she felt, deep down inside the both of them. And even if Van was much less expressive of anything that he had towards her, it was still there! He had always been there… and only a fool like Hitomi would have pained him so many times. 

  
'Only a fool like me…' she sadly thought, 'would be stupid enough to betray her true love for anyone else, any Allen or any Amano or whoever, and would be stupid enough to break her promise to him. Only a fool like me could possibly forget the only one person that loved them when they promised they never would forget…. When I promised I would never forget… hmm…I don't think anyone's that foolish but me." 

  


**_"That someone so unforgettable…"_**

  
Hitomi found herself now in a strange place, a desolate place filled with a navy blue, water-like liquid that waded just above her waist. It was very dark, almost as black as the room of nothingness, but there was still a strange aura of dim, blue light that came from an unknown source somewhere above her. She really didn't know where she was, and she felt as much confusion and fear as she had depression. Her last vision had taken a lot out of her, and it was rather difficult to function clearly in this apparently new situation she was in. 

  
Suddenly a feeling of nakedness came to Hitomi, sensing she was exposed in this dark room where she prayed no one could spot her, and immersed herself up to her neck in the flimsy blue waters. She blinked; feeling oddly relaxed in the strange fluid, feeling now that it was deeper than she had thought it to be, her bare toes scarcely skimming across the ground below. She could not see her past her neck though, for the water was too thick and too dark to see through. Before her, the surface of blue liquid disappeared and blended right into the black background. Hitomi really tried to rationalize, try to place all that alarm away. It was only a vision, she'd have to learn from it, not fear it. 

  
Hitomi's nerves eased a bit as that song came on again, wondering if it had still been playing all this time. How long has it been anyway? She really didn't know, it wasn't like she had a watch on or anything, and since in this strange room she could not feel location or position, she obviously wouldn't know much about time either. Her arms waded in the slimy coolness to keep her balance, wondering why she was here, and why she couldn't just be in that dark world again. It had been better at least to be fully nude in the pitch black where no one could care less, rather than looking as if she were skinny-dipping in the weirdest lake ever. 

  
Suddenly, a notion was beginning to creep around again at the back of her mind. It was telling her to turn around, and look behind. 

  
'Turn around,' it kept saying. 'Turn around, Hitomi.' 

  
Hitomi, not needing to analyze her mindly commands any longer, spun herself slowly kicking her bare legs in the viscous ooze. Something was waiting for her, something behind her. 

  
And so Hitomi now faced where once her back faced, looking on to the dim blackness of what was left that she could see. The ambience of blue light did not extend far past her, but even then she could still make out the calm outline of a solemn figure, standing in the line where light and darkness met, the eerie waters wading up to his knees as he stood in the far shallow part Hitomi was once in. 

  
She still stood dumbfounded, tasting the sweet water lick upon her lips as she accidentally stepped further deeper. Moving back upwards, she waited just enough for her pupils to dilate casually adjusting to their shadowy environment. He was standing there now, not very far away, the light beginning to bring up his appearance to her view… it couldn't have been… 

  
_"Hitomi, it is so good to see you again."_

  
Hitomi's mouth gaped open, once again accidentally swallowing some of the mysterious liquid. She couldn't quite believe her eyes nor ears! There he was, there was Van! The one that had been speaking to her, the one who had shown her all these things! It was so different from seeing him in the visions, in the visions it was never present day. This Van lived in present day and showed her the past; this Van was trying to tell her something that was still quite vague and unclear but she had to know. He was the only one who could help her in piecing her puzzle together. 

  
**"I can't… I can't believe it's you…"**

  
She was at an obvious loss for words, wishing to rush up to him, touch his face, make sure he was real. He stood now clearly visible, a funny tint of blue. Hitomi noticed now that everything was a shade of blue, dark or light, in this place she was in. Even her skin upon her back was a funny cyan tint. She noticed though, what was strange was that his gloves, the brown ones Van regularly wore, were not blue. In fact, they were red, a bright red that stood out like a misspelled word, an error in a modified place. 

  
** "I'm sorry Van! I'm sorry for what I did to you! I don't know why…"**

  
Finally, Hitomi was able to let out a few of her thoughts, shouting from the distance she stood in the murky waters. 

  
_ "You didn't do anything, Hitomi. It was unfair to both you and Allen. Fate had forced you to do the things you did, and even if it hadn't I wouldn't hold that against you. I would always wish you to be with anyone who makes you happy, whether it was Allen… or…"_ ****

  
"Amano…" 

  
Hitomi finished for him, thinking about it for a second. This Van here knew of her wedding to Amano didn't he? Was that what he was saying? Was he happy for her that she had found Amano in her life? 

  
_ "Just be happy, Hitomi, do as your heart desires. I'm only showing you this to allow you to understand what I think has been wrongly forced away from you. You should have the right of knowing your life, your full life, and everyone in it, and that's why I've shown these visions to you."_ ****

  
"And I do understand Van, I do! I know now all that you've done for me! And I understand that I've broken my promise to you… I wish I could find some way to make up for -" 

  
_ "Don't worry about such things, Hitomi. I told you, it's not your fault. I know, within, you have never forgotten me. I know all along, and so do you, that just like we said, we were still together in our dreams."_

  
Van nodded his head, and tapped his chest with his crimson hand, 

  
_ "And in here as well."_

  
Hitomi sighed, feeling the beauty in his words, still feeling that longing to make up for what she had done. She had forgotten; she had done the wrongdoing. Van was being much too forgiving of her. If only she could actually find him, the one beyond her visions, in real life, beyond her mind, and tell him all she felt. 

  
_ "I have just one more thing to show you before I let you go,"_

  
Van continued on. 

  
_ "There was a lot of good memories that we had Hitomi, that you've given me, but I guess it's only appropriate to end this with our goodbye. Come, Hitomi, come with me…"_

  
Van stretched out his hand, a ruby speckle for Hitomi's reach. 

  
Hitomi hesitated, remembering her odd situation as she watched him neck high in the black lake. 

  
** "But Van…"**

  
She could feel the pink blooming in her cheeks, quite embarrassed at the moment. 

  
Van gave her a cute smirk. 

  
_ "Did I ever tell you Hitomi how adorable you look in that uniform?"_

  
Hitomi paused for a second, appalled by his words, then noticed what he had meant. Of course, as she looked down, she could see the collar of her oxford shirt peeking above the water. She laughed to herself; only her mind would be full of such odd happenings such as being naked one second then fully dressed in the other. Stepping high up to the shore, she felt her clothes were very surprisingly dry, then smiled at the Van who stared her back in the eyes. He had this knowing of her, an understanding of her that she doubted she's ever seen in any one else before… That Van. Oh he was a wonder indeed, one handsome, mystical wonder indeed. 

  
She took his hand and closed her eyes, feeling that same drifting sensation as she did each time Van took her back to the Time, a feeling of weightlessness and time travel. Hitomi was comforted at the thought that in this occasion, he was with her, he would be by her side the way she'd always want him to be. 

**__**

  
* * * 

  
The sun shone just right as its rays danced amongst the forest leaves, never too bright and soothingly warm. It helped illuminate the glorious surroundings, nature at it's best resting in solitude. The ground was fresh and crisp beneath one's feet, the air was light and breezy to the touch, the sounds of residing creatures were nestled in the scenery. As beautiful as it was, one wouldn't have guessed how rare it would be to see such a sight. 

  
But Hitomi knew. She knew. This land was not always so tranquil, not always so beautiful. She knew that even the very ground she walked upon, the very air she breathed, was once enveloped in nothing but war and corruption not very long ago. In fact, she could have sworn that this city she stood within, had been entirely abolished! But now, here it was, rebuilding itself from top to bottom and bottom to top, in a way she had never seen before. 

  
Hitomi was once again settled in another of her vision's many scenes, but this time, Hitomi was barely aware of it at all. There was only a part of her, a very small, diminutive part of her thoughts that _knew_ she was only seeing her memories, _not_ reality. But as mentioned before, it was a small, edging part of her mind, definitely not enough to overpower the new emotions and thoughts that were slowly breeding inside of her. Inch by inch, second by second, traces of Hitomi's present day being was beginning to fade. Her thoughts were slowly being filtered, any worries or concerns being temporarily discarded. 

  
Hitomi's thoughts dwindled, and mixed into a blur of events and times and people. She stood as she always did near the beginnings of visions, lost and analyzing. She was forgetting and remembering, confusing and learning, and with time she could see many pieces, pieces of her thoughts and memories, being brought together, like a puzzle being joined. As the eternal seconds ticked by, she began to realize that Hitomi was new and old. Her mind had sat and worked to bring herself back. The new Hitomi was living back in the Time. Her mind had brought her here, to see, to think, to live it. 

  
The new Hitomi was really the old Hitomi, brought back in newer time. This Hitomi was _not_ aware that she was in any vision. She had no idea that what she saw and experienced, were events that had taken place half a decade ago. Her memories of future figures, like employers, like wedding planners, like new roommates, university professors, were all gone. Gone, just like that. Instead, Hitomi's frail little mind was now swiveling with new yet old thoughts that involved leaving, involved friends, involved new worlds, involved new people, involved Van. 

  
As if on cue, this younger Hitomi turned her head just in time, as she heard footsteps crunching lightly on the brusque forest floor. 

  
Suddenly, she knew again it was Van, as he joined her by her side and stared straight ahead. They were looking at gravestones, large, symbolic gravestones. Hitomi remembered them instantly, the Fanel Graveyard. She allowed her eyes to be enticed at the divine scene, a large, cement monument peeking high in the surroundings, protected by a wrought, iron fence. 

  
Joyous yet sad feelings took over her for a second's time, as she fiddled with her uniform buttons in thought. She felt… she really didn't know. Should she be happy, or should she be sad? Fanelia, after all, Van's home, was finally being restored. Here she stood now in the land she had been positive would be vanished forever. But Hitomi had been wrong; there was peace at last, wonderful peace! She couldn't recall any time where she had seen the Gaean people so happy! They all worked so hard, filled with love and celebration, to building Fanelia back where it was, with Van, the ever-deserving king, as their leader. 

  
Hitomi's smile was only partly though, as she gazed aimlessly around her with her short bangs interrupting her view. She was also thinking about being… being sad. Why would she be sad at a time like this? It was so wondrous, peace, what everyone had hoped for! Yet, if it was so great, why did Hitomi have to leave when the greatness was just starting? Was her journey really coming to an end? It had been an adventure she had been unwilling to take, and now unwilling to leave. Hitomi still couldn't come to grasp that it was time. That it was time to let everything go, to lose the everyday of the world of Gaea, to leave behind the good times and the bad, and to return home. But what was Hitomi's home now (if it was her home at all) in comparison? Did she honestly have the same kind of friends on Earth as she did here? Is she really as respected and as cared for there as she is here? It seemed a disturbing thought to her, after all, she had wanted to return home in all this time, in all this very long time. Why, just why, did she now have so many doubts? 

  
Van breathed deeply as he looked ahead of him, glancing at the very graves where the memories of his vanished family lay within. Hitomi was quiet too, maybe also thinking to herself. He wondered if she could understand just how much he saw in those graves, just how much they meant to him. Sure, maybe to some people, some indignant people, they would only see burbony trees and large slabs of stone. Many people would be blind to understand it's real message, its message to Van. 

  
There lay his family, his wonderful yet deceased family, resting in peace. Amongst them was his father, a true king of Fanelia, the late Gewau Fanel. Van didn't remember him all that well, but he knew in his heart, if alive, Gewau would have been a figure Van would have greatly respected. His father was true to the people, and also, true to himself. Gewau had not let society deem his heart, and when he had fallen in love with Vari, a blood-descendant of Atlantis, Van's mother, nothing could stop him. The boundaries of Draconian and human love were his to cross and his alone, and no ruler or king could tell him that was wrong. No one could tell him _love_ was wrong. 

  
Smiling, Van's eyes admired his mother's memorial stone as well, as he felt again that pang of sadness. Vari had been his one parent that he had known the best, yet still not long enough. She had been so faithful, to her family, to herself and to Van. He knew the hardships that had been weighed on her at the tragedy of his father's passing, and also the burden of being different. But Vari was not one to disappoint, she raised Faulcon and she raised Van, and Van had to say, she raised them damn well. Her life, after all, had been taken for the sake of searching for her son, his brother, when Faulcon had disappeared. No one else had braved the danger of searching for him in the dragon-infested wilderness, nobody else but Vari. And although she had never found him, Van knew his mother's discontented spirit still kept searching, still kept looking, and he knew she had been the one which had restored the love in Faulcon's heart, had turned him away from the evils of Zaibach - she had finally found him. Her spirit had changed Faulcon, she had been the one who had changed Faulcon back to the good brother he had once been. 

  
Van's eyes, misty now, lastly fell on the newest grave to sadly be added, his brother's. Van sometimes still had a hard time believing Faulcon had been alive all that time… when they thought he had definitely been killed after Vari's failure to find him… and now had a hard time believing he was gone once again, for good. He never really understood Faulcon and his intentions very well, but Van knew that in the end Faulcon had fought for the very same thing that Van did: Peace. Faulcon had made his mistakes with Zaibach, but Van made mistakes as well. Unfortunately, his brother had to pay the greater price. 

  
Hitomi watched in surprise and awe as Van quickly lowered himself to his right knee. She watched silently as he held his head bowed, strands of black hiding his face, adding to that ere Van always had. She felt a sense of compassion for him, once again mixed with happiness and sadness. 

  
Van had his kingdom at last, had his country once again. But Hitomi knew alongside Van's losses were great, and he was now the last living member of his family. Poor Van, no wonder he was so isolated inside, so unexposed with his real feelings. She realized now how lucky Van was to have Merle. Without Merle, who else would take care of Van once Hitomi left? She couldn't think of many who would stay in Fanelia with him. There was only one other close friend Van had that she could recall, that man. That warrior man Van had admired like a father, that fighter named Balgus. Zaibach had claimed his life as well. Van had lost him as well, like nearly everyone else that was important in his life. Hitomi cringed at the very thought that now Van was also losing her. 

  
"Brother we have finally returned to our homeland," Van rested his intricate sword respectfully on his knee, head still bowed in the sunlight. "Watch over our country's future here." 

  
Hitomi smiled softly, admiringly listening to Van's voice amongst the stillness 

  
"It seems like so long ago that I first came to Fanelia," the words came out a little sadly as she watched Van slowly stand alongside her. "So… what happens now?" 

  
Van breathed deeply in content, dusting off his knees and gently sliding his sword back in its sheathe case hung on his belt. 

  
"Everyone's dreams will go on creating Gaea." 

  
Hitomi nodded thoughtfully, watching again in surprise as Van walked over to where Escaflowne rested itself in the shade of the trees. Its large metallic parts glinted beautifully in the daylight, barely scathing the surface of the treetops. 

  
She watched curiously as Van, using that strangely amazing strength he had, leapt upwards balancing slightly on Escaflowne's large, knelt knee. His footing was as always, incredibly accurate, as he slowly edged towards the ruby chamber which shone like a gem in Escaflowne's upper torso. She couldn't help but wonder just what Van was up to. He was now reaching his arm into that glass chamber, and she tried to put away those pestering thoughts on how that could be possible. Escaflowne had a lot of wonders to it she was yet to understand, just like the whole idea of Gaea's existence. It was a magic that no matter how hard she tried, she could never fully comprehend. 

  
"Thank you, Escaflowne," Van wasn't so sure of himself, as he gripped that mighty drag-energist which he had removed from the heart of Escaflowne, almost like sucking the life out of it. He could feel it's warm crystal slightly pinching his skin, reminding him of how hard that one little energist was to earn, and how hard it had worked for him once earned. It honestly still amazed him at the incredible powers that lay within a dragon's heart; the very same powers that had fueled his Escaflowne for the years and generations it had served. Was it truly the best decision to end it now, to take away the life from Escaflowne? Van knew well that Escaflowne had managed to save, rescue, and protect many lives of those he cared for, but all the same it had destroyed the lives of many in the battles of war. Escaflowne had served him when it was needed and it served him well. Now was the time. Now was the time for many things. 

  
"Van…" Hitomi whispered in awe and a strange, newfound respect as Van leapt down and walked back towards her, holding that energist in his hand. She couldn't really believe it, Escaflowne without Van? It didn't seem right. Ever since she had first met him that fateful day so long ago now, she could never really picture Van without Escaflowne. She could even remember the very dragon that Van had bravely fought when they first met, the one that had died for the sake of Escaflowne. She could as well, remember when Van had awakened that brute of a machine, could still remember the very first time Van had handled that mysterious guymelef, that mysterious white dragon of metal. Hitomi knew that Van and Escaflowne, man and machine, had bonded so close it was hard to think of one without the other. 

  
"Escaflowne should be kept asleep," Van as if confirmed her thoughts, glancing down momentarily at the precious energist in his hand. "My brother's wish was for a Fanelia, for a Gaea, where no one would rely on it. I want to see what that world is like, Hitomi." 

  
He smiled down at her, seeing her listen to him so attentively, so interested and captivated in his words. Van had known her for so little, yet she knew him so well. He couldn't help but wonder when he had last met a friend that good to him. 

  
"And I want to see it with you!" Hitomi smiled earnestly, eyes glowing as she looked on deeply at his. She stared hopefully at his image, that brave face of a warrior, the same face that had taken care of her for so long. She was so full of hope, yet unfortunately overwhelmed by reasoning and common sense. 

  
"… or can I?" A tint of a sigh floated from her, as her eyes dimmed and lowered, "The truth is, I love it here! I love Fanelia!" 

  
Van smiled, a little taken aback by her words. He really hadn't thought she was so fond of the place, after all the ways she talked about returning home, and even that one time when she did. But Hitomi had returned back to Gaea now didn't she…. Just maybe, deep down, she had really grown on Gaea all along. 

  
"If you'd want, it'd be more than fine with me," he felt himself lighten in hope at his words, wondering what her reply would be as he stared back at her glimmering green eyes. In all honestly, Van was saying the truth. He didn't have many, if any, times like these with Hitomi, alone to talk with her. Van never really did get to know her, get to know the things she liked or didn't like, her thoughts, feelings…. He never really bonded like that with anyone, maybe Merle sometimes, but she was so much younger than him, and more like a little sister. He could tell Hitomi would be the perfect person to confide with, the perfect person to tell anything he liked to, and the perfect friend. She would listen so well, just like she always did. 

  
Hitomi tilted her head upwards in surprise, in enchantment that Van would gladly have her stay. And the more she thought about it, the more dangerously she began to get attached to the idea. Well why not? A part of Hitomi's existence dwelled in Fanelia, in Gaea. A part of her had been permanently etched here with her new friends, her new experiences, her new home? Could she really abandon Earth, her mother, her friends, and her old life forever? And if not, could she really leave Van behind, and pretend as if nothing as wonderful had ever happened? It just seemed that whatever choice Hitomi would decide to make, it would still leave her partly, if not fully, unhappy. 

  
Van felt a little stung by her silence, but could easily sense the depression in Hitomi's thoughts. Van wanted her with him; Van wanted her to stay! But that was yet so selfish, so self-involved, wasn't it? He wanted her with him, he wanted her to stand by his side to reign their peaceful country, but this wasn't Hitomi's destiny. He knew that her stay was short and sweet, but she had come from another home, and her future remained there, no matter how stubborn Van may be. Van had _promised_ her he would bring her back home ever since they had first met, he had vowed it to her before everyone and Van had kept his promise. He couldn't back out now, even if he wanted to. 

  
"You know… we can see each other anytime we want, we just have to think about each other," he looked on quietly at her watering eyes, slightly touched by the sentiment that flooded from her. He knew that she knew it was time. They both could sense it tweaking at the moment. 

  
Hitomi could feel her throat swell, and the image of Van before her blur. Why did he have to speak with such beautiful words anyway? Why did he have to talk to her in a way that graced her heart and made her twinge with hopeful sadness? Why did Van have to make it so hard for her to let him go? 

  
"Van…" the name came in just under her breath, feeling the bittersweet tinge of a tear glide down her cheek. She had told herself she wouldn't break down like this, not like this in front of Van. But Hitomi hadn't known the things he would've said, or the things she would've felt, or anything that was to happen. So now, her emotions were the only things controlling her, the only things that could matter at the moment. 

  
"Here Van." 

  
Van furrowed his brows in surprise at Hitomi's teary figure, slowly extending her hand towards him. He didn't know what to expect, he didn't know what to do. It was _time_. The thought kept creeping in his mind as much as he tried to ignore it. He wanted to hold her, maybe if he did, she wouldn't leave…. 

  
"Keep it," Hitomi looked at him, looked at the astounded image on his face as she delicately dropped her cherished pendant in his hand. She could feel the soft brush of his fingers as he took it from her. Hitomi held no regrets. She wanted him to have it, it had brought them together, and now it would keep them together, somehow… 

  
Van's eyes fell upon the beautiful necklace, the instrument to Hitomi's amazing powers, the key to their very acquaintance. As he stared at it, he knew now, the feeling was strong._ It was time_. The days had seen them through faster than he had expected, and now, the time had come. _It was time to say goodbye_. 

  
Hitomi didn't expect it. Hitomi didn't expect it as Van immediately drew her in, didn't expect his hands to brush against hers and pull her close, didn't expect to feel him so near to her, to even feel his faint heartbeat near her chin. Hitomi didn't know what to think as she felt herself sink into the sweet depth that was Van, and she was immersed into his sadness, and into her own. It was then that Hitomi knew. 

  
Hitomi gasped suddenly, noticing she was _here_. 

  
_Who was she? Where was she?_

  
"I'm Hitomi. I'm here, in my memories of Van."

  


  
The thoughts clamored and questioned and answered themselves so loudly and disturbingly in her mind as she felt her confounded arms search for comfort, felt the outline of his rugged body, felt herself immersed into a friendly and loving warmth she had never known. 

  
_It was too much; all this was too much._

  
It was happening. What was happening? It was happening. She was remembering, she was realizing, she was knowing, she was feeling. 

  
She was Hitomi, Hitomi Kanzaki. She was twenty-years old. She was in a vision, an important vision of something that had once happened. She was engaged, engaged to someone named Amano. She was in love, in love with someone not named Amano. She was falling for Van. She was _with_ Van. She was in love with him, in love with the memory of him, in love of the thought of him and the feel of him and the scent of him and the sight of him and the heart of him. Hitomi was confused. Hitomi was right. Hitomi was wrong. Hitomi was sad. 

  
"I'll never forget you… I promise… even when I'm old." 

  
Hitomi felt the words slip out of her mouth, tickle off her lips, beyond her control. Almost instantly, she felt the throb of their meaning; the sting of a promise she knew was nothing but a lie, the hurt of staring into Van's young and hopeful eyes, believing her, trusting her. Hitomi could feel those tears, salty tears in abundance now, soaking the tip of Van's gaunt shoulder. She could feel her fingers trembling upon his back, in guilt and sadness and depression and realization… 

  
_It was time._

  
Van had never felt someone so close to him before. So close, as if one could merely hear the other's deepest thoughts and secrets, as if one could feel the pain, the emotions of the other. Close enough to feel her hands lie gently amongst his back; feel themselves pressing and near to each other, in what was a moment divine in itself. Close enough to even kiss her if he dared to be that bold, that expressive, for at the moment it felt as if there was no space between them at all. But that was only for the moment being, change was on its way. _It was time_. 

  
Regretfully, Van released his hand from Hitomi's waist then stretched it upwards high above his head, the hand with the mighty energist, in a noble act he would never live down. He didn't know why he knew this was the way it would have to end, but he just knew. It was that driving instinct that Van had with Hitomi. He knew when she needed him; he knew when he had to be there, he knew what there was to do. Van was a man on a mission, whether human emotions got in the way or not. He knew he had to send her home, despite what he felt, despite the sacrifices he'd have to make. He would have to, that was it, and he just knew. 

  
He held his surprise as suddenly a bright beam of blue flooded their vision out of nowhere, soaring towards them swiftly from a pierced hole in the Gaean sky until the blinding light seemingly surrounded the two of them, highlighted them out of everyone on Gaea. Encased them, encased him, told him that it was going to be _now. It had to be now._

  
The force of the light was nearly frightening, yet he barely paid it mind. He could feel the active energist burn with vigor in his hand, and quickly he dropped it by his side paying it no attention. His mind was focused to the greatest, as it usually was. He knew what these seconds meant, these precious and dear seconds he couldn't get back. They meant it would be the last time, the last time that he knew of, the last time he would see Hitomi, for days to months to years to forever, and that was that. There was no changing his fate; he had to send her home. 

  
Van felt the lag in his heart grow, the emphasis in his mind weaken as he sensed her, Hitomi, slowly lift off the very forest ground, defy the very magic of gravity, slip further past his reach. 

  
Almost instinctively his hands gripped hers, tightly, securely, as if he actually believed he would have the strength to hold her back, to keep her here to himself. Yet, Van may have had the strength, but it was the selfish desire that Van still lacked. He held her, for now… 

  
Hitomi's fingers were barely gazing his fingertips. She tried to reach them further, but it wouldn't do. The light was blinding; the force was pulling. She wasn't strong enough to fight it, but willing enough to accept it. This was hard. This was really hard. This was nearly impossible, yet… she had done it… once before. She had lived this! She had been through this! She had lost him like she was now… so many years… so many years ago… 

  
"I'll never forget you." 

  
Hitomi realized then that those were the last words that Hitomi would ever say to Van Fanel of that time. She realized then this was the last time she had seen Van and for so many years, and had fully understood who he was, and what he meant to her. This was the only time where that puzzle was nothing but a clear, together, and perfect image. She was beginning to see, to understand, she was beginning to know. Van needed her to understand this, it was just so important. 

  
"Hitomi…" 

  
She didn't know what to feel as his youthful image quickly faded, smiling up towards her for the last time of that time, lost in the flood of bright blue. It didn't really sadden Hitomi though, nor did it make her happy in any given way. Instead she felt a burn as her body was wrapped in this light, this revealing light. It told her things, these memories told her things, gave her things. 

  
A burn. 

  
A burning desire, flaming with desire. Hitomi now knew. She knew not how she knew, but she just knew. Now Hitomi Kanzaki was the one with a mission. She was now the one who was focused to the utmost highest, she was now the one driven by instinct, by a deeming, unforgettable instinct: 

  
She would find him. 

  
She would find him. 

  
She would find him. 

  
**_

"Thinks that I am… unforgettable… too."

_**


	11. Session Tapes II Revelation

**11.) Session Tapes II - Revelation**

"Cath, are you sure Hito's asleep?" 

Yukari couldn't help but grow more and more uncomfortable. She couldn't stand the idea of just sitting where she was, knowing that Hitomi was just a room away, and possibly awake. 

"Yes, yes, yes, trust me I'm sure. She's been out of it for hours now. My gosh Yukari, it's gorgeous!" 

Catherine Corain dangled the beautiful bracelet into the early morning sunlight streaming through the living-room window. It hung delicately from her wrist, catching glimpses of sun through the detailed, sapphire gems. 

Yukari calming slowly, nodded agreeably, peering at the intricate design admirably, then giving yet another hesitant glace in Hitomi's room's direction. 

"Are you sure she's sleeping? I can still hear her alarm radio. Are you positive she took the day off? It's not like Tomi to miss work, she's a workaholic!" 

Cathy frowned momentarily at Yukari's doubt. She was actually absolutely certain that Hitomi was asleep, if not hibernating, in there. She herself had been quite surprised to wake up at around nine a.m., only to find her roommate (who was usually gone to her day job at that time) dozing right through the alarm radio! Cathy also knew it wasn't likely that Hitomi would be purposely skipping her job without warning. 

"She wouldn't wake up," Cathy continued on her story to Yukari lowering her voice to a whisper just in case Hitomi had awakened without her knowing. 

"I tried but she was practically unconscious! And she looked so peaceful, you know, I didn't really want to disturb her… Then you came by so I guess she's been sleeping ever since. Hitomi _must've_ taken a day off or something, I don't think she'd miss work either." 

"Yeah, weird." Yukari gave a sigh, retrieving the bracelet as Cathy carefully handed it back to her. 

"I just want to make sure she doesn't hear anything about my surprise until the wedding. Could you believe how bad it would be if she walked in right now?" 

"Oh of course," Cathy shook her head at the intimidating idea. According to Yukari so far, Hitomi was in for dozens of wonderful wedding surprises from Yukari, Amano, her mother and so on. It just wouldn't be right for Hitomi to know even one little word! Some secrets are too precious. 

"This is something only bridesmaids can know," she gave a friendly grin as she passed the yellow packet of Choco Gobos in Yukari's direction. "I wonder what's better, getting to plan everything, or being the one everyone's planning for? " 

Yukari smiled thoughtfully chucking a Gobo into her mouth, allowing the chocolate ball to melt delicately as she studied the tiny sapphire petals chained to the silver vines. 

"Hmm… good question. I mean, it's obviously great to be getting married, but Hitomi's not _in_ on anything! It's funny in a way, that we're having a good time planning for her to have a good time! I just hope she still loves this bracelet as much as she used to back in grade nine. Ever since Amano and her were engaged I just knew this would _have_ to be Tomi's something borrowed, something blue! As long as nobody's already beaten me to it!" 

"Well, it won't be me," Cathy mumbled through a mouthful of Gobos as she lay back casually on the loveseat across from Yukari. "I have nothing blue that's even close to as pretty as that is, or would even match a wedding gown! But I sure will be the one fighting for that bouquet once Hitomi tosses it, I'll tell you that much." 

"Ha, who won't be?" Yukari laughed imagining the large catfight in the middle of the wedding ceremony. She was counting to have a main part in it, if not be the solo figure all together. 

"But wait… Cathy, don't tell me you're single, are you? That is _you_ with that guy in that picture on the window table isn't it? I mean, I thought you had your own hunky guy to tell me all about today!" 

Cathy twisted her long braid around her right fingers, slightly rolling her eyes in discontent as they somehow fell upon the glass-surface table by the living room window near the balcony door. Her eyes scattered amongst the many picture frames of her family and friends on the one side, and Hitomi's on the other. 

"I did." 

"Oooh," Another fattening Gobo melted away in Yukari's mouth as she rolled it around in thought. "Well, so? What happened? I can tell by the look in your eyes…aaah.. you got that look! He was _good_ wasn't he?" 

Cathy giggled a bit, thinking over to herself, shifting to another position on the couch laying back her head on a pillow wondering about it. 

"Well, out of all of them, I guess Jake is one I'm not going to forget any time soon. Humm…. Four years together too… I suppose you're right; it _was_ good. He was the best, I guess." 

"Aww… four years? How cute! But come on, if he was such a great guy then what happened between you and this Jake?" 

"Kari, what do you think happened? I mean, I'm here aren't I? And Jake's there, back home all the way in Mexico… so that was that. The relationship just had to end." 

"What?!" Yukari couldn't help but narrow her eyebrows in disbelief. Her theory was, once she found the right one, she would latch on for dear life. "You mean you guys cut it short just because you had to move to Japan?" 

Cathy sighed softly and sadly, nodding her head, "Well, it's not like it was easy, but it happens you know? Neither of us were ready for any big commitments, like marriage and moving in together or anything, we had bigger things to worry about so… we went our separate ways." 

"Oh," Yukari pinched her brows together sheepishly; she just hated sad endings. She sure wouldn't have put away her feelings for a guy _that_ easily, but that was Yukari. Her priorities weren't always exactly the same as others, or as important. 

"Well, you know what they say, if they're meant to be, they'll get together someday, right? Love has no boundaries… at least I hope so…" 

"Maybe…" Cathy forced a smile shrugging helplessly as she slowly picked off some lint from the sofa arm. She suddenly wished she hadn't said anything, now fighting off persistent images of Jake and her, and those times, all those very good times she was instantly starting to miss. Just at those memories, homesickness began creeping into her thoughts once again. 

"Well, I'm sure it will," Yukari gave a supportive beam placing the bracelet and its box back into her purse by the foot of the sofa. "He wouldn't forget someone like you." 

"Aw, thanks there Kari. But don't worry about it, I'm okay, I'm not like, super-depressive or anything! But hey, whatta bout you? Is Hito going to be bridesmaid anytime soon?" 

Yukari froze for a second, shutting the bag of Gobos before she could gain another hopeless pound, then flicked her hair back laughing at the idea. 

"Me? Getting married, now?! Oh heck no! I'm a little busy playing the 'dating game' here, there's no way you'll find _Yukari Uchida_ settling down just yet. There's plenty of fish in the sea and I plan to use all the hook and bait I got, if you know what I mean." 

"Hehe, sure, of course," Cathy laughed it off. "Being committed for such a long time is a, I don't know, a scary decision? But what about all the previous guys? You have to have a favorite from all of those." 

"Ooo," Yukari frowned contemplating. "Well, yeah, everyone has their favorites. I had this one boyfriend who was like.. sooo sweet.. *sigh* and another one, Tony, who was really romantic… and then there was…hmm… but…" 

Cathy smirked curiously, as she spotted the thoughtful glimmer in Yukari's eye. 

"Kari, don't hide it! Just pick one, just _one_. It's not that hard at all! I mean, there has to be a 'best', right?" 

"Well, there was…" 

"Sooo?" Catherine couldn't quite believe how nosy she was becoming, but girl talk was as hard to end, as it was easy to begin. 

Yukari gave another hesitant glance down the hallway. Hitomi's bedroom door was still shut tightly, the droning murmur of the alarm radio still floating in the backdrop. 

Catherine noticed the direction she was staring at, and jutted Yukari mid-sentence. 

"I know what you're going to say, and yes, it looks like Hitomi's still asleep. Besides, you wouldn't care if she heard anyway, right? Knowing how good of friends the two of you are, she probably already knows who your favorite guy is." 

"Look, I'm sorry Cath, you know what? We really should've never gotten into this." 

Yukari's eyes couldn't make contact with Cathy's, as she nervously fiddled with a loose thread on her blouse. She could feel the pressure to talk and to just answer the simple question weighing down on her, but her major worries were not with Cathy at all, but instead with Hitomi, little did Cathy know. 

Cathy tried to hide her frown, and gave an encouraging smile instead. 

"Listen Kari, you're not obligated to say or anything; I was just wondering is all. You're right though; some things should stay personal. Besides, we're only starting to get to know each other." 

Yukari sighed nodding rather slowly, feeling a little guilty as she sensed the tone of disappointment in Cathy's voice. Actually, honestly, deep down, she _did_ want to say something. Some things should stay personal, but other things should be let out in the open right? After all, the two would be bridesmaids together… Cathy _was_ Hitomi's roommate… such a good opportunity for new friendships… 

"Not that I'm trying to be mean or anything…" 

Cathy looked up in surprise as Yukari continued to hesitate. She honestly didn't think the question would've been such a stumper for her. Yukari was a very pretty young woman, and to be honest, Cathy was surprised that Yukari wasn't going steady with someone at the moment. With her friendly, bubble-burst personality, and flustering highlights, Yukari didn't seem like the perfect candidate for a single girl. Maybe she had just gotten out of a hard relationship as well… 

"Hey Cath, do you _really_ want to know? I mean really really want to know?" Yukari was practically whispering now, almost in such a dim level Cathy had to struggle to make sense of her words. 

"What? Why are you whispering Kari?" 

Yukari frowned as she jerked her head in the direction of Hitomi's bedroom, still shut, and still fairly quiet with the exception of the radio. 

"That's why I'm whispering." 

"Wait a minute," Cathy's eyebrow instantly rose, as she tweaked her braid around her wrist curiously. "You really _don't_ want Hitomi to hear this do you? Why? Oh let me guess, hmm, it's her ex-boyfriend or something?" 

"In a way… "Yukari twitched. Geeze, Cathy caught on so quickly. At this point, she would've _wished_ it was Hitomi's _ex_-boyfriend or anything least of the case. 

"I don't think Hitomi's the kind to hold a grudge about something like that," Cathy sat up on the couch, reaching for her nail file, trying to shrug off a very twisted thought coming to mind. It had a little something to do with a _phone call_. 

"Oh I know," Yukari agreed. "That's true, Hitomi's always nice about stuff like that. But let me just put it this way, Amano was Hitomi's first boyfriend right?" 

"Yeah, I remember her saying that," Cathy's nail file froze sharply at that little fact, scraping loudly against her index fingernail. Wait a minute… "That means…. You're saying that Hitomi didn't have any ex-boyfriends? Aren't you?" 

"That's exactly what I'm saying," Yukari sighed deeply feeling that Cathy had already analyzed the rest of what was bound to unfold. 

"Ever since I can remember Amano was like, the only person Hitomi's ever had such a serious relationship with. I mean, yeah, she's had a few crushes here and there, but not like, relationship things… anyway, do you see what I'm trying to get at?" 

Catherine's eyes fell instantly, as she knew she already knew, and tried to grasp the thought of believing it. It wasn't such a _bad_ thing, stuff happen between people… but Cathy felt that now she was the one glancing down the hall every other second, praying for Hitomi to be way out of earshot. 

"Um hum, I see. Amano was and is Hitomi's only boyfriend, and I guess… you dated him? Right?" 

"Oh no!" Yukari suddenly felt drowned in her own words. "I _did_ date him, but that was way before Hitomi and Amano were an item! Trust me, he would never cheat on her, and damn straight, he wouldn't ever as hell cheat on her with me!" 

Yukari let out a breath, brown strands of hair blowing casually in another strange pause for words. 

"So when were you seeing Amano?" 

"Before Hitomi began seeing him; we were around seventeen. Hito's _liked_ Amano for four years, I know that for sure because that's when we met him. But after, this _'thing'_ happened, let's just say Hitomi 'left for a while'… somewhere… to be honest I have no idea where she really went! I remember she told me, before she left, to go after him, to tell Amano how I felt, that is. I don't know, somehow Hitomi _just knew_ I had feelings for him too." 

Catherine nodded totally absorbed. She had no idea such things could happen between three friends over a course of time. And what's more, she had no idea if Hitomi had any idea that her best friend considered her fiancé as a "favorite." It sure was an interesting thought. 

"Basically, when Hitomi returned, so to say, Amano and I were in a relationship, and I'm not going to lie, it was a good one, probably the best one I've been in. I don't know if Hito's ever told you, and maybe it's not my business to tell you, but here goes anyway. 

"When Hitomi came back, she was um, how do I put this… 'Traumatized'." 

"Hitomi?" Cathy felt a twinge of surprise. 

"Yeah, I guess I shouldn't say any more than that, I'm sure she'll tell you herself sometime soon. Well, let's just say Hitomi wasn't the same; she had therapy sessions and everything!" 

"Oh my, I had no idea…" Cathy lost all trail of voice. Hitomi saw a psychiatrist for trauma? What could have ever happened to her? 

"Yeah, it was tough. I barely talked to her; there were a lot of stuff happening at that time. Investigations and things… it's a _long_ story, a sad story. Amano and I still saw each other but um, it wasn't the same without Hito, you know? She was in home schooling for all of tenth grade, we didn't see her at all really. It was really scary, she was gone just like that for so long, and then when she came back… she was just so…so…It was hard, let me just say that." 

"How sad! But why?" 

Yukari sighed hesitantly recalling the details, "Well, they said she would need to spend more time with her psychiatrist to improve her conditions, let me tell you, she was... uh… very _unstable_ at the time. So when we started seeing her outside her home after quite a few months, she was beginning to get better." 

"It took a whole year eh?" 

"Yeah I know. Tough. But you know, it still took a lot of working through, I mean a LOT. It meant a bunch of self-sacrifice for Amano and myself. I think we saw each other for about a year and a half, when we turned seventeen, then we broke up." 

"Oh… really? But… but…" 

"We had to! It wasn't like there was much choice really," Yukari gave a saddened impression. "I was and am Hitomi's very best friend, and Amano had moved back to Japan from England, and ever since he was always supportive of Hitomi's problems… so was I. We like, both just knew that if we were to give Hito the love and support she needed, _we couldn't be together_." 

"You couldn't?" Cathy didn't know what to think. She was honestly starting to feel the hurt in Yukari's words. 

"No… it's like, horrible! You visit your friend everyday after what she's gone through, you see her getting better, and all the while you just know that when she sees you and her ex-crush _together_, it must sting like hell inside!!! I knew somewhere Hitomi was looking for someone. Someone to hold onto, to depend on, to help her get better." 

"And Amano was that someone?" 

"Yes. I believe so. I was there for her, and he was there for her, but he could give her something I could not. He could give her what he gave me, which was a true kind of love and friendship mixed together. I wanted Hitomi to have that. I wanted her to get better, and I wanted her to be happy." 

"Oh my gosh," Catherine shuddered as goosebumps danced up her spine. She didn't think the _whole_ story behind the unrivaled suspicion would actually be so… so nice… in a way. It wasn't trashy or dirty, or cruel at all! Yukari favored her relationship with Amano because it _was_ a good relationship! She hadn't done anything to hurt Hitomi, but instead the exact opposite. 

"Yukari, my gosh, did you ever tell Hitomi this?" 

"Well no," Yukari hissed it again wishing Cathy would keep her voice down. Her mind kept hearing footsteps from Hitomi's room in that paranoid kind of way. "I could never tell her _that_." 

"But why?" Catherine continued to insist. She felt a sort of empathy for the situation. "I mean, of course you and Amano are on good levels now, you guys are just friends, and they're getting married! It would be nice if she knew-" 

"Think about it Cath, I'd be telling her that I once actually _loved_ her fiancé! I mean, I don't feel like that anymore, but it's just _weird_. And they are getting married, more the reason I should keep my mouth shut." 

Cathy sat silently for a few seconds, obviously defeated in argument. She knew Yukari was right; it was almost like immoral for Kari to go up to Hito and confess something like that out of the blue. But it was such a sincere act… it was also wrong for Hitomi not to know the kindness of her own husband and best friend, right? 

**_CRASH!!!_**

Yukari practically leaped out of the sofa, feeling her self barely teeter at the cushion end as the loud crash woke her from her blur of thoughts. 

"What in the hell was that???" She shouted it with shock, glaring in the direction where the loud crashes and bashes, like a microwave being beaten to death, were still coming from, loud and strong. 

Cathy could feel a thick lump forming in her throat as she stood quickly and gazed down the corridor. She could spot flashes of moving shadows glimpsing from the crook beneath Hitomi's bedroom door, the source of the loud banging. 

She didn't have a very good feeling about it at all. 

"Hurry, get up Yukari, it's coming from Hitomi's room. I think she heard." 

Yukari nervously edged behind the short Catherine, staring down Hitomi's door in dismay. Hitomi was awake all right, and she made sure her presence wasn't taken lightly. The bashing had ceased a little bit, but every now and then the anxious two could hear grunts of anger as their disturbed and concealed friend continued beating the helpless object, whatever it may be, to smithereens. 

"Maybe we should leave her alone," Yukari's voice came out under a whisper, her hand nervously clasped on Catherine's shoulder. She stooped quietly, her stocking toes gracing over the wood-tiled floor. She really didn't want to go any further. They had reached Catherine's bedroom door now in their nervous inching, and it wouldn't be long before Cathy was within reach of thrusting open Hitomi's door and finding out what in the hell was going on. Yukari almost didn't want to know at all. 

"We can't leave her alone, something's wrong. People just don't wake up like that, Hitomi's never acted that way ever since I've met her." Catherine's reply was soft too, like Yukari, almost afraid of her languishing roommate hidden within the bedroom, exploding so suddenly without warning. But what was with her newfound behavior? Hitomi doesn't just _destroy_ things, which is what it sounded like. Hitomi was docile, and very reverent with her property…. 

"I've seen her this way before," Yukari continued to cautiously hold Catherine back. "I have, and it's not pretty Cathy. Something is wrong, but you don't understand, it's not what you think. Hitomi only behaves this strangely when…" 

But Catherine simply couldn't listen to Yukari any longer, the delay was just torturing her inside. Almost in an instant, shutting her eyes she blindly gripped the bedroom doorknob and she flung the door wide open. 

**"For the love of God, Hitomi, PUT IT DOWN!"**

Yukari watched in worried shock as Cathy stepped cautiously over the rubble remnants of a smashed alarm radio. Pieces of wiring and LED displays lay crushed on the bedroom carpet. Amongst it all stood Hitomi, a couple of feet away from her untidy bed, sweater sleeves rolled up to her elbows and an intimidating aluminum bat gripped sturdily in her right hand. Yukari was positive that Hitomi's mind was not where it should be. 

Cathy worriedly watched as Hitomi backed up, grunting defensively as un-brushed bangs hid her dilated eyes. The deranged woman was still waving the bat at her menacingly, warning Catherine to keep her place, and not to move a single inch closer. 

"Hitomi!_ PUT IT DOWN_." 

Cathy repeated her order firmly, eyebrows narrowed with her hand trembling before her in reach of the bat. 

"Oh gosh, Cathy, please, let's just leave her alone!" 

Yukari continued to plead helplessly from the doorway, wondering what had just happened. Hadn't Hitomi just been resting peacefully in her room while Yukari and Catherine chatted? Why was Hitomi now so suddenly out of it? What had happened to her? Had she heard Yukari's secret? Was that what made her so driving mad? 

"Hitomi _CUT IT OUT!_" 

Cathy ignored Yukari's requests to leave Hitomi be, and crept ever closer to her unstable friend. 

Hitomi was a mess of an image. She had that morning look on her, tired and groggy, but also strangely accompanied by alertness and paranoia. What on earth was going through her head? Was this what Yukari meant about Hitomi being 'traumatized'? Did she even do this often? There _was_ that one time when Hitomi had knocked out in a bad dream or something a few weeks back…. was this regular behavior of Catherine's new friend? 

**"YOU STAY BACK!! I'm warning you!"**

Hitomi's voice came out ail and forceful, her feeble arms swaying her weapon continuously. She didn't want Cathy to come any closer. She was already too close as it was. 

But Catherine Corain, after growing up in a family as the only daughter amongst six brothers, many of them older, was very familiar with this game scenario. She was not afraid of Hitomi at all, she may have beaten the crap out of the poor radio, but even in her frame of mind she still wouldn't dare attack Catherine, or Yukari. The bat was just some sort of security barrier to keep unwanted things away, but there was no rule that Cathy couldn't break through it. 

In a swift move that sent Yukari shutting her eyes and squealing in fear, Cathy made a daring step forward and in seconds managed to successfully wrestle the bat out of Hitomi's fetish hands. She could feel the resent and anger that Hitomi expressed as Cathy had her defeated. 

"**Give it back!**" The confused girl still continued to speak, thinking as if she could possibly win this one. But the situation was futile; Catherine was not going to tolerate much more. 

Cathy watched in a strange sorrow as her lost roommate collapsed back onto the bed shaking her head restlessly from side to side. The handle of the aluminum bat still felt eerily warm from Hitomi's tight grip. 

Yukari carefully edged around the bashed rubble and joined Catherine by her side. She felt a heaviness grow inside her, a strange worry that always confounded her about Hitomi. She sadly watched her eccentric friend gradually grow calmer, releasing the hair that she had been pulling madly with her fingers, Hitomi's deep and rapid breaths slow to almost a normal pace. As strange and disturbing as the scene had been, Yukari's mind lay absolutely thoughtless in shock. 

"Hitomi, just _WHAT_ were you thinking?" 

Cathy was, of course, the first to break the demeaning silence. 

Hitomi Kanzaki, as expected, was slow to respond. She simply gazed upwards at her bedroom ceiling at a loss of awareness. She was starting to wonder to herself, what had just happened? Where was Hitomi now? She could feel the absorbing comfort of her bed calling her to sleep again, but something was bothering her mind. Things weren't right. There was something wrong; she could feel it burning inside her as she lay motionless. 

Yukari bit her lip feverishly, waiting. When was Hitomi going to wake up? Why was she acting this way? Why? It was coming too often now, and the behavior was all too familiar. One or two visions could probably be stomached, but now Hitomi was pushing the limit. Her wedding was down to a little more than three weeks. Preparations were being made, and everybody was ready, except Hitomi. This was just what they didn't need at this time. Yukari knew this scenario all too well, the obscure Hitomi who would often just seemingly 'blow up' out of the blue, then gradually float in these confusing states of mind which worried just about everyone. She had gotten over this. Hitomi had won over these strange actions _years_ ago… but why? Why was it coming back to haunt them all over again? 

Hitomi blinked once. 

Then twice. 

She felt a tired feeling inside her, a sleepy feeling of 'waking up' and realization. It took her long moments to grasp that she was now in her bedroom, her very own bedroom, lying groggily on an unmade bed. Seconds later, she began to feel the presence of those around her: people, friends. Hitomi hadn't even known! Why? Was she sleeping? But… she couldn't have been! Had everything just been a dream? Was she really here in this little room all night instead of all the places she had seen? What about all those people she had met… they were real… weren't they? 

Confused, and slightly frightened, Hitomi managed to bring herself to her elbows before she collapsed back down in shock to see none other than Catherine and Yukari glaring back at her with eyes as big as saucers. Their mouths lay hung half open, as if wanting to say something, but not knowing what. Hitomi felt the same, wanting to think something, but nothing was coming together at all. 

"Oh Hitomi," Catherine let out a humongous breath of relief and found herself quickly falling by Hitomi's bedside. She didn't say a word but instead wrapped her arms around Hitomi's shoulders and helped bring the girl up to a sitting position. Hitomi felt warm, almost sickly warm really. Thousands of questions were instantly forming in Catherine's clouded mind. What had managed to happen in just a matter of five minutes or so still held her stunned. 

"Are you alright?" Cathy whispered the words, as if afraid to anger Hitomi in any way. She held onto her, feeling like Hitomi was so drained that she needed Cathy's support just to stay sitting up. 

Her pale reply of a nod was barely noticeable, "Yes." 

Yukari continued to bite down on her lip nervously, hoping that there wouldn't be any more breakouts anytime soon. She felt scared yet compassionate at the same time, and Yukari couldn't quite tell which emotion was stronger at the moment. Instead, she simply allowed her eyes to wander until they fell upon the broken clutter embedded now into Hitomi's cream-coloured carpet. 

"Please Hitomi, tell us, tell us what happened…" she made sure her voice was extra soft and extra comforting as she slowly sat by Hitomi's other side, giving a worried glance also in Cathy's direction. 

Cathy nodded, staring at Hitomi curiously, rubbing her back encouragingly. 

"Come on Hitomi, you can tell us! We're here for you." 

Hitomi couldn't quite tear her eyes away from her knees. She couldn't bring herself to look her true friends in the eyes. She knew now. She had just had a vision, and had somehow reacted in a blast of emotion, which left her friends frightened and concerned. 

Catherine, poor Catherine, she didn't even know Hitomi all too well! What a great way to start, scaring the girl half to death too many times in a row within the first month. She was still at awe on how Cathy managed to put up with it. 

But how did Yukari? Hitomi couldn't help but give a semi-smile at that thought. Yukari… her very best friend. That girl had been by her side for so many years…. Never would she have believed it! They had been through so much together, past and present alike… and through it all Yukari still managed to be there for her, year after year, time after time. 

"Hito?" Yukari gave her an encouraging nudge, hoping it would help lighten the situation. "Do you need to rest it out for a while?" 

Slowly, Hitomi shook her head, "I'm alright, I think." 

Cathy smiled at Hitomi's slow recovery, "Are you sure?" 

"Yes." 

Cathy breathed deeply in relief once again, giving a thankful grin in Yukari's direction. But Yukari's eyes were not glowing as Cathy's; they were focused straight up ahead. Catherine's grin faded as she turned to face it. 

Hitomi heaved in despair, knowing that they were all referring now to the destroyed rubble sitting so ever inconveniently in the middle of the room. Frankly, Hitomi didn't really know what to make of it either. She didn't even _think_ she had that much strength in her! And most of all, she didn't think she would actually destroy that alarm-radio! Hitomi actually liked that alarm radio, it managed to wake her up every day bright and early… well, today was basically the only exception. 

"…Hitomi?" Yukari gave another worried look at Hitomi's delayed responses. 

Hitomi slowly stood, almost needing to use every ounce of effort in her body, managing to walk just a foot over then gaze down at the mess on the floor. 

"… the song…" 

Cathy flashed Yukari a strange look. The 'song'? What did Hitomi mean by that? 

"Tomi, what do you mean? What song?" Catherine finally stood up as well, kneeling over to inspect the shattered pieces. She gazed on upwards where Hitomi silently stood with a thousand unheard thoughts blazing a second. 

"The song," Hitomi repeated, feeling her voice come back to her slowly, loudly, starting to feel a stronger build of self-consciousness, and a stronger desire burning inside her. 

"Beautiful song. It was… un… un… unforgettable. An unforgettable song." 

"Well then what was it called?" Catherine still looked confused. In all honesty she couldn't picture how on earth a 'song', whatever it may be, could influence Hitomi to smash her radio into indefinable pieces. It still wasn't fitting behavior for Hitomi, and Hitomi still wasn't answering the plodding questions directly, but only made the situation more confusing than before. 

Yukari sighed growing small with patience as she watched her dazed friend stoop down to pick up a chunk of broken plastic casing. Yukari knew that Hitomi, in these conditions, would be very stubborn to answer any questions the way Yukari or Catherine would figure she would answer them. Yukari could almost _sense_ the strange thoughts and instincts, which were oddly placed in her friend overnight. _Something_ had hit her, something had gotten Hitomi in this mystic trance, and something was motivating her absurd behavior. 

"…Unforgettable…" Hitomi repeated it again, studying the worthless piece of plastic in her hands. It was so _small_, so tiny. It had once been part of a beautiful little device. How had Hitomi managed to manipulate that device into nothing but useless little fragments? 

"Is that it?" Cathy tugged at Hitomi's pajama sleeve fighting to keep her attention. 

"Is that the name of the song? 'Unforgettable'?" 

Hitomi merely shrugged, tossing the piece of plastic back to the floor. 

"Come on Hitomi, is it? That really old song by um… who was it... Nat King Cole, right? Is that the song you're talking about?" 

Hitomi stared back at Catherine, eyes expressionless. She gave no signal of agreement or disagreement. Instead, she just stood there, thinking secretly as she had strangely been doing. 

Impatiently, almost angrily even, Yukari quickly got up off the bed letting out a grunt of dissatisfaction. She forcefully stepped past Catherine, between the rubble and herself, and stared at Hitomi directly in the eye. Their even height helped a bit as Yukari continued to stare her down, face-to-face. 

"_Hitomi, SNAP OUT OF IT._" She hissed the words, knowing that Hitomi was fully capable of hearing. The girl was not deaf; she was only ignorant. Hitomi was choosing what she wanted to listen to and what not to, but Yukari was planning not to give her any sort of choice. 

"Listen to me HITOMI, _wake up!_ Neither Cathy nor myself think it's _normal_ for ANYONE to beat the crap out of a radio, for a stupid song from the fifties!" 

"Yukari-" 

"NO! NO Cathy, you know I'm right! Don't you get it? Hitomi's just playing a little game with your head. Do you hear me Hitomi? You're twenty years old now. We all are. So you know something? GROW UP. I'm getting sick of these mind games Hito, now just tell us what the hell happened here and get on with your life. Got me?" 

Her face was flushed a bit, and her hair almost frayed out with her demands. But Yukari was just acting the way she knew she should. Some people just need a verbal slap in the face to wake up and smell the roses. 

Hitomi winced suddenly at her friend's cold words, glancing downwards, shunned. She felt stupid and stubborn at the same time. Hitomi was aware that she was aware of her surroundings, but still, she felt this odd reluctance to respond, or communicate with her dear friends. There was something blocking her usual resume of thinking, something that was stronger and much more persistent than the words that floated around her ears. The words that scratched her mind and dwelled in her thoughts were far too distracting at the time. 

"Oh Yukari!" In a flood of upset emotion and confusion, Hitomi grabbed her best friend by the shoulders, shaking Yukari a bit as she pleaded, "PLEASE!! You HAVE to help me!" 

"Tell me, Hito! Please! We'll help you." 

"No, you won't understand. The song was playing! It kept playing! " 

Yukari and Catherine both raised an eyebrow questionably, yet still urged Hitomi to continue on. 

"_'Unforgettable'!_ Yes, it was that song! It was so nice and it was so beautiful and it went so well with him, until the radio started to wake me and the songs began to change and-" 

"Slow down Hitomi!" Yukari brushed Hitomi's shaking hands off her shoulders and stared at her intently. "Tomi, be clear with your words so that we can understand you. Now, was this music playing on the radio? And who's the _'him'_ that it went so well with?" 

"I don't know! I don't know! It wasn't on the radio; it was all around me! Every second I was there and it was playing over and over and over again! It was always in the background!" 

Cathy stepped forward curious, involving herself into the conversation, "What background Hitomi? Where was this song coming from then?" 

"I DON'T know! It could've been somewhere, or maybe just in my head, look I can't explain it! All I know is… is that it was right! I've never forgotten him! I don't think I have because obviously right now, right here, there's a growing part of me that's remembering! I'm remembering _everything_…" 

"Everything?" Yukari's expression was mixed with worry. "Hitomi, please, be clear! What do you mean by 'everything'? What do you remember?" 

"Him! I remember him and the way he saved me, rescued me! I remember all the details, all the lands, all the people. I remember the battles and the giant machines and-" 

"Oh gosh…" Yukari felt a creepy tingle run up her skin at the familiarity of the words. "Hitomi, you're talking about _it_ aren't you? The… the Time?" 

"Hey!" Cathy let out a confused glance as she turned her attention to Yukari. "What do you mean? What 'time'?" 

"Yes," Hitomi's answer budded into Catherine's question. "It's what I've been ignoring all this time Yukari! _Don't you understand?_ I've been blocking it out, denying it-" 

"Hitomi," Yukari stepped forward now, absent-mindedly pushing Catherine aside as she gripped the shaken Hitomi by the shoulders. "You're not denying _anything_. Listen to me Tomi, you're all right now. Honey, you've been through all those psychiatric sessions, you know you're okay and you know that you haven't been blocking anything." 

"That's just the thing!" Hitomi shook her head madly, wisps of bangs flying everywhere. "THAT'S what made me deny it! All those sessions made me forget who I truly am, or what truly happened!!!" 

"But what _did_ happen?" Cathy raising her voice to overpower the commotion somehow managed to squirm between Yukari and Hitomi as she tried to fight the 'truth' out of the two. She remembered Yukari mentioning Hito's shrink sessions before, but she had no idea how far this plot dug down. 

"You guys, I don't want to pry but I'm here too and I'm just trying to understand. Now what's all this about battles, and 'him's, and the 'time'?" 

Yukari gave an annoyed glance in the small woman's direction, shrugging her shoulders sarcastically. 

"Well, I have noooo clue Cathy, why don't you ask Hitomi over here, she obviously knows all there is to know." 

Hitomi turned back towards Yukari, glancing at her friend smirking at her with the high cheekbones and framing highlights. For some reason, that image, that image of Yukari, her best friend, was starting to become _intimidating_. She didn't like it; Hitomi didn't like this feeling at all. It felt like it had before, like it was before when Hitomi had returned from that mysterious Time. This was just like the way Yukari had acted back then, doubtful and sarcastic, Hitomi remembered well now. No, Hitomi couldn't say she liked this attitude at all. 

"I don't have to explain anything," She shut her eyes in disgust and made her way past the radio rubble to the doorway. "These will, Cathy. These will explain all you need to know." 

Catherine and Yukari both exchanged curious looks as Hitomi disappeared beyond the doorway and down towards the living room. They weren't slow to follow, carefully avoiding the smashed mess which Cathy couldn't help but groan over knowing she would have to clean it later. 

Eyebrow raised, Yukari couldn't help but wonder what Hitomi was up to as the girl was digging through a wall-unit drawer. Yukari was beginning to feel rather concerned. Her memory was rather acute; as little as she admitted it to Hitomi. She never liked to tell her friend that she could remember every detail of their challenging younger years. And of course, Yukari's never mentioned the 'Amano' topic ever in their history as friends. _Had_ Hitomi heard her and Cathy's conversation? Was this why she was dragging everyone back to that mysterious Time they were bound never to fully understand? 

"These," Hitomi, finally satisfied, managed to pull out three old and black audio tapes with faded labels. "Here they are Yukari, and Cathy." 

"But… what are they?" Catherine curiously took the tapes from Hitomi's outstretched hand, studying them over. 

Yukari only had to give a momentary glance to know, "They're her session tapes, or at least only a few of them. So you did want to learn more about the Time, didn't you Hitomi? I didn't think you would actually take my advice to get those tapes." 

"Well, why not?" Hitomi looked back over her shoulder as she bent down beside the living room stereo. "I was serious when I told you that I wanted to remember, Yukari. And I've been remembering without even having to really listen to these." 

"If you haven't listened to them," Cathy inquiringly looked back at Hitomi as she handed her the tapes to be placed into the stereo. "Then how did you remember anything? The therapy sessions were a couple of years ago, weren't they?" 

Hitomi nodded, inserting the third tape into the B tape player, strangely wondering how Cathy had already known that Hitomi had visited a psychiatrist in her past. 

"I told you, it was that song and that vision. I know it was a vision now, they've all been visions." 

"What? What have been visions?" 

"Everything," Hitomi snapped the tape case closed and began rewinding it. For some strange reason, she just kind of sub-consciously knew that she had to play the _third_ tape, and that she had to rewind it. It was of course, Hitomi's strange sixth sense active once again, and even without her noticing, it was entirely in control of almost all of Hitomi's actions. 

"Don't you remember Cathy? I know that Yukari knows what I'm talking about; she's seen me at my best of times and at my worst of times. And so have you, I guess. I know that you still remember my second vision." 

Cathy fidgeted uneasily, "It was that little 'episode' you had back a couple of weeks ago right? During that horrible storm?" 

"Yes Cathy," Hitomi stopped the tape satisfied. "That was it. I never told you that it had been a vision, and did I tell you the night before I had had a vision also?" 

"Two visions," Yukari cut in out of nowhere. "That's two whole visions, and now with this new one I suppose, that makes three. You mean to tell me that you've now had three visions after going three successful years without visions?" 

"Exactly," Hitomi smiled a bit, feeling herself being understood for once. "That's what I meant about 'it coming back', Yukari. It's all coming back now. These visions, these memories… whether you believe them or not is up to you. But I'll tell you something definite that's written in stone as far as I'm concerned: They're back, and they're back for a reason." 

"But… what were your visions about?" 

Cathy felt her heart sink, as she was once again lost in the conversation. She felt totally out-of-it, and uninvolved. There was obviously a lot that she didn't know or understand, that yet still came naturally to both Hitomi and Yukari. Sometimes, Cathy often skipped on the fact of just how many years Hitomi, Yukari and Amano had all been together without her. 

Hitomi, still smiling slightly, pressed down on the protruding "play" button. 

"Let's just find out for ourselves, shall we?" 

**PLAY » (entering past scenes)**

Hitomi bit her lip to keep back a yawn. Who was in there now? Both her mother and Yukari had disappeared into Dr. Teroka's office so long ago now; and both of them were bound to be interviewed. Hitomi really didn't understand the importance to it all, but Dr. Teroka said it was for "future reference" or something to find out just what her family and close friends thought of the situation at hand. Whatever it was, Hitomi only wished she could listen in. If only she could listen to what Yukari and her mother actually thought of her behind closed doors. 

She sighed growing more and more impatient and bored. She had only been attending her sessions for a month now, with two sessions each week. Each one had been recorded, every minute and every word. And strangely enough, only now did Hitomi _actually_ manage to finish telling the WHOLE story to her psychiatrist. 

Yes, the whole story, back to front and front to back. Hitomi had never explained such a long length of time in such incredible detail to anyone. Actually, she felt relieved they had been recorded and now off her back, knowing that Dr. Teroka would analyze the tapes later on, and maybe, just maybe, come to understand her a little more clearly than everyone else was at the time. Never had Hitomi recalled so openly about all the events that had taken place. She had been asked to though, asked by her friends, her peers and her family, but she had never really said the _whole_ story. It was a long and twisted tale after all; she could only hope that Nathaniel Teroka had an open imagination. The more Hitomi repeated the fascinating events, the more she revealed the secrets of Gaea; the more it felt like a happy dream in her mind rather than reality. 

Hitomi woke up suddenly from her blaring mind as the office door creaked open. She had been so focused on her thoughts that the interruption had jutted her elbow right off the uncomfortable waiting chair armrest. 

Out came Glenda Siam, Dr. Teroka's assistant, in the usual knee-length white coat. She smiled at Hitomi, as she usually did, in that strange sympathetic/doubtful kind of way. It wasn't all that reassuring, but nonetheless, Hitomi smiled in return and stood for a mild stretch. She had already lost count of how long she had been waiting. 

"How are they doing?" She unzipped her track jacket and walked over to Glenda's small secretarial office dug into the far side of the waiting room. She would often come here when waiting for Dr. Teroka to finish another session, just to talk to somebody about the everyday. Hitomi figured that Glenda was probably the only one in the world right now that could talk to Hitomi without bringing up anything about the sessions. Glenda said they were confidential, and they can stay that way. 

"Pretty good," she smiled nudging her reading glasses back on as she sorted through many of Hitomi's documents she had just been handed. "Your mother and your friend look just as lost in there as you had been on your first day. From what I hear, he's interviewing your mother first." 

"Oh great," Hitomi flipped through a magazine casually leaning against the office counter. "He's in for a real treat all right." 

Glenda laughed and sat back down in her computer chair, every once and while glancing in Hitomi's direction. 

"I wouldn't worry about it Hitomi. Most people tend to say really nice things about the patients just to get these sessions out and over with." 

"Not my mother," Hitomi gave a long eye-roll. "She'll stretch this on as long as it takes for me to 'return to normal'; whatever that is." 

"If you ask me, you're one of the most normal people I have ever met Hitomi, whatever happened (not that it's any of my business) doesn't affect who you are or how you act. That's what makes you normal in my eyes." 

Hitomi gave an appreciative smile, "Hey thanks, I'm glad someone thinks that way. I wish my mom could, or my friends. But I can't really blame them either, can I? It must have been hard to deal with my disappearance for so long, and then have me come back out of nowhere. Well, still though, I wish Mother didn't have to go out and send me to a _psychiatrist_." 

Glenda peeled her eyes off the computer monitor for a second longer to flash Hitomi a sympathetic look, "I know what you mean Hitomi. A lot of people come here feeling oppressed, like they're being forced to be here against their will, and many times, like with you, that is the case. But you know, you being here to get better makes them better too." 

"Really? But how?" 

"Well, the way I see it, a lot of parents send their children or teens to us because they're concerned for their child's mental health, like sending a kid to the doctor if you fear they're sick. They don't mean to offend you, or oppress you, they're merely being caring people. You know when someone is worried over someone else's health, it hurts them too? That means if the person they're worried for _doesn't_ get help, then they're not helped either. By sending you here, it makes you feel better and them as well." 

Hitomi cocked her head sideways, slightly envisioning Glenda's view of things. 

"But what if that person they're worried for is not sick?" 

"Well yeah, that happens a lot too," Glenda continued on. "Most of the time, the patients are just fine, and only need a little bit of counseling. But still, the reassurance that their child is 'okay' is still needed for the parents or friends. They _need_ to hear that come from a professional, and then and only then will their concerns be satisfied." 

Hitomi smiled partly in return, moving over quickly as she noticed new patients waltzing into the office, making their way to Glenda's registration desk. 

Hitomi gave Glenda Siam one last appreciative grin as people pushed past her, knowing that the kind woman would be far too busy with the new incoming patients to spare Hitomi much time. It looked like now she was bound for a few more agonizing minutes of endless boredom. 

"...just down the hall. I'm sorry, excuse me," a young lad looking a few years older than Hitomi, uneasily squirmed past her in the surprisingly quick-filling waiting room full of Hitomi's "psychiatric inmates", as she liked to joke. Already she could feel the intimidating press of impatient bodies packing against her as she finally found a few decent inches of space near a magazine rack. Hitomi wasn't all too surprised about the newfound congestion though; she had quite expected it. After all, this was the downtown Aimsa psychiatric office of Dr. Nathaniel Teroka & Associates, with about four other doctors working under Dr. Teroka's wing, and also a pharmacy next door. It was usually busy, but never really crowded; today must have been an exception. Hitomi figured it had to be some sort of national "inteview-the-relatives" day because it seemed that half the people filing around her were probably just related to the actual patients. 

Hitomi let out a breath, leaning herself against the cool cream-coloured walls and lazily flipped through a magazine, gazing back up at the clock above Glenda's office window too many times too often. It didn't seem as if time were going any faster than before, unfortunately enough. She could already feel the annoying pain at the arch of her neck from craning it over a health article for so long. Rubbing away the pain, Hitomi couldn't help but let her eyes wander upwards once more. 

He was still there, that kid, the one who had brushed by her. He was leaning against the registration counter where Hitomi once had stood; watching the conversation between a woman (who she supposed was his mother) and Glenda of course. He looked awfully bored as well, though Hitomi couldn't recall seeing him earlier. Actually, she didn't think she had ever seen him at a session before, though of course he could just have a different schedule. 

His eyes were gazing aimlessly now at the buzzing fluorescent lights above, hid partly by these thick, deep black bangs. His arms were crossed loosely, hanging gallantly off his thin posture. A knee was slightly bent, and he slouched a bit to the left, but not in a lazy way, certainly not. Hitomi could tell he had a pretty handsome build, young but strong.... mysterious yet handsome... 

Hitomi shut her eyes and turned away violently. What on earth was she doing? She had to stop! She couldn't keep doing this to herself! It wasn't right! It was just some kid; that was all. Why did she have to think such things all the time? Why did everything have to remind her... of...? 

Well, Hitomi didn't even want to say _who_ or _what_ just about everything reminded her of, but Hitomi wasn't stupid. She knew who she was thinking of, and she knew just how hard she had been managing to control the uncontrollable, that is, until now. Until that stupid kid had to go by her with his stupid copycat looks of... of... well, you know. 

Hitomi was just refusing to admit it to herself. She didn't want to! She couldn't bring herself to just say that... that she _missed_ it... that she missed everything... everything and everyone. It hurt, and it hurt badly whenever Hitomi thought about it, which is why she blocked it out as best as she could. But it didn't always work; her sessions hadn't progressed far enough just yet for her to lose everything. Oh no, Hitomi could still recall a lot of things in such vivid detail it was frightening and saddening at the same time. Visions still haunted her, night after night, and sometimes right through the spark of her day. It left her in this strange untamed state, this untamed state being what worried her friends, and what definitely worried her mother. 

But still, even beyond all the realization of what was real now, and what was real then, could not surpass those pure emotions that came every once and a while, just like now. Just one simple boy, leaning casually against a countertop, listening in on a conversation, could make her heart leap for a hopeless hopeful second caught in a mirage, thinking of someone, wishing it were someone... wishing it were _him_... 

Hitomi knew it could never be, and probably never would be, but that didn't stop Hitomi from wishing or from hoping. She missed everything, and most importantly, she missed him. Yes, she missed him; she missed _**Van**_. Hitomi knew that, she felt that, and she knew that even if the memories faded, even if his image became lost and blurred, and the visions overpowered, there would still be that hopeless hopeful feeling. 

It was that same feeling Hitomi would fall asleep to, and the same depressing feeling which would wake her in the morning. She knew there was no true way of getting rid of it completely. Psychiatrists, sessions, medications; none of it will do! This burning feeling had met Hitomi when she met him, strengthened in Hitomi when she left him, and now lay within her, empty and unanswered. How long would it stay? Honestly, she didn't really know, but she couldn't see it leaving her anytime soon. For to Hitomi, nothing could really get rid of such a powerful and lonely emotion, nothing could destroy such an incomprehensible bond, nothing could ever really answer the pain of unanswered love. 

**Session Tapes - Interview # 1**

"All right then, shall we get started?" 

"Sure, okay by me," she gave a hesitant smile and a part-nod. Honestly, Hikoro Kanzaki really didn't know just what she would say, or what she'd have to say, as she watched Nathaniel Teroka carefully switch on that black tape recorder. She had accompanied Hitomi for the first session, but still, it wasn't like this. At least, it never felt as intimidating as this at _that_ time. 

"Okay then, Mrs, Kanzaki," Nathaniel paused for a sip of coffee as he began quickly setting aside all sorts of sheets and documents. "I'm just going to begin with a few introductory questions I pre-made, just to sort of get a general view of your opinions on Hitomi's situation." 

Hikoro nodded again, uneasily observing as Nathaniel continued to fish out sheet after sheet of Hitomi's files; psychiatric files on _her_ own daughter. Hikoro had no idea they would get into so much paperwork, although Hitomi had mentioned that they did a lot of communicating, and Nathaniel Teroka would jot down just about every other word. 

"Ahem," clearing his throat, Nathaniel finally scrounged up his interview sheet in a third graying folder. "Now to begin... Mrs. Kanzaki, as a mother, what is your general impression of your daughter, Hitomi?" 

"Like _now_ or..." 

"I mean in general, how would you describe her?" 

"Well," Hikoro squirmed in the patent leather confounded in thought. How does one describe their own child anyway, without sounding totally biased or under biased… 

"She's _truly_ a wonderful girl," Hikoro nodded finally, gazing absent-mindedly at Hitomi's many documents as she thought of her "general view" of her daughter. 

"Very smart yet sociable, you know? I mean, I may be highly concerned about this 'thing' that's happened that's resulted to these sessions, but I guess in general Hitomi still stands to be very respectful and yet opinionated also. I care for her, but I'm also proud of her in many different levels." 

Nathaniel smiled out of the corner of his mouth, jotting down his notes in seconds' time. He was slightly leaning back now on the armrests of his swivel chair, the bright light filming in from the window behind him casting eerie shadows against his image. 

"That's really good to hear, I'm sure Hitomi would be delighted to hear that. Now, this may be harder to say, but what is your view on Hitomi's conditions? I'm speaking of her mental conditions in general." 

"Mental conditions..." Hikoro's voice slightly strengthened than trailed. What was she to say to that? She had so many different thoughts on her daughter's problems it was difficult to center all of those in a 'general view'... 

"Well, um, I'm concerned for her mental well-being, a lot I guess. If I wasn't, I wouldn't send her here." 

"And what is it about Hitomi's condition that worried you? Feel free to add all the details you feel are necessary." 

"Well, the worry part is pretty obvious!" Hikoro leant forward at the chance, feeling her voice come running back to her. 

"I mean I had to go through four months without my daughter!!! **_Four months!!!_** Agonizing long months thinking she was dead, or kidnapped, or run away… it's horrible… you understand don't you?" 

Hikoro winced a second as she recalled the distressing time, and quickly fought to spit out the rest of her saddening thoughts as they came one by one. Four months had never felt so trying and traumatic ever before in her life. Four months had never shed so many tears. Four months had never broken her heart as they had at that Time. 

"... I mean, at first I thought, _'Well, yeah, maybe she's still okay,_" she continued, fighting to keep her voice from cracking. 

"_'I know my Hitomi, she'll come back to me.'_ And I told myself that! I told myself that over and over but after so many weeks that only became a lie! A part of me had started to believe that, _'No, she's not coming back'_. Something happened, something horrible, and she's gone! My Hitomi's gone! And what's worse, a part of me was starting to accept that, until I couldn't..." 

She gave another uncomfortable sigh, shifting her position noticing that Dr. Teroka was remaining silent and attentive, edging her to continue on. She could hardly believe how hard it was just to answer one of his most simple questions. Or was it really simple at all? 

"Basically I accepted it after that. What choice did I have? We had the memorial ceremonies for her, just small tributes. All of her friends and outer family attended. Do you know just how _sad_ that is? _**A missing child?!**_ Sometimes, I wish they still put the faces on milk cartons, just so I'd know that people were searching for her, that someone could find her! But no, now Hitomi was only a part of hundreds that were gone for who knows why. It was hell for me, a living hell. And I guess the worst part was how it tore me up inside when she returned." 

Nathaniel bit his lip sympathetically, feeling Mrs. Kanzaki's tone losing itself in emotion. 

"That was the worst part for you? When Hitomi came back?" 

"No, not the 'worst' technically," Hikoro Kanzaki sighed again, feeling trapped and uneasy. 

"I mean, yes, I was overjoyed that my Hitomi had finally returned, who wouldn't be? My daughter had come back. I thought I lost her, and then she came back to me. But that's just the thing…. I wasn't ready for it. It was too much. Do you know what I mean?" 

"Of course I see," Nathaniel nodded, his office chair creaking as he leaned back. "You had to face the trauma and acceptance of losing your only child, then when she comes back to you out of nowhere…" 

"Yes! That's exactly it! It didn't make sense! It was wonderful, but so confusing! We had all these strange people in our home; child welfare, detectives, counselors… And nothing was adding up! Nothing! Everything Hitomi said about that period of time got everyone else more confused than before!" 

"Yes, we will be getting into that," Nathaniel bowed his head for a second to scribble down a fury of notes. "There were obviously many challenging issues to handle at that time, but on a general topic, would you say that you find your daughter's conditions stable now, or are they too much for you to handle?" 

Hikoro sighed, tweaking nervously at the armrest, wondering what was with all these damn 'general view' questions. She couldn't quite bear with summoning up her Hitomi in nothing but a paragraph. 

"A little bit of both, I guess? I mean, Hitomi is still such a sweet girl. She still minds her manners and does her work, but she's _different_. She's very different. It's not like it used to be, it's more extreme now. I'm used to Hitomi's occasional premonitions or readings, you know she's gotten quite famous for them. But now…" 

"Yes, she's mentioned that. Hitomi says that her 'visions' or psychic outlooks first came to her at a rather young age, near nine or so?" 

"Yes, that's exactly it," Hikoro smiled partly in thought. "I believe Hitomi gained those unique powers at that unique time in memory of her father, he was good to her. These kinds of emotion-inspired visions have been running through my family line as far back as I can remember. My grandmother, my mother, myself, and now her." 

"What kind of encounters did you perceive?" 

"Oh, simple little things, like visions, or premonitions, or just knowing what face the die will land on, things like that." 

Nathaniel nodded, still writing quickly, "Were you involved with Tarot cards, like Hitomi?" 

"Oh, those," Hikoro almost grinned. Tarot cards; next to running, they were Hitomi's best talent. 

"They were a gift to me and then a gift to Hitomi from my mother. I've used them a few times, but I'd say Hitomi is the most skilled with them. She's always asked to do readings for just about everybody." 

"Really? And since this is a usual trait of Hitomi before the occurrence, what is your opinion of her earlier conditions? Like, before this whole incident happened?" 

"Her earlier mental conditions? To me they were fine! I mean, I could deal with readings and fortunes, things like that; it's a family thing. We all have a connection in that way, but especially Hitomi. You know, I seriously believe that my daughter has some sort of connection with my mother; I can just _feel_ it. Hitomi reminds me a lot of her." 

"Yes," Nathaniel nodded still rubbing his graying chin. "She's mentioned her grandmother a few times before. Hitomi says she was a great inspiration to her during that 'occurrence', which is interesting to note actually. Did Hitomi not receive that pendant from her?" 

Hikoro nodded, half guiltily, locking and unlocking her fingers together. 

"Yes, she did. But I have no idea where that beautiful pendant is now, that's such a pity. It was such a precious heirloom." 

Nathaniel raised a brow questionably, "Really? I remember on one of my first sessions with Hitomi she _showed_ me that pendant! The ruby-pink one, right? She's been wearing it every time I've seen her!" 

Hikoro clasped her hands tightly now, sighing a bit, "That's not the one." 

"It's not?" 

"No," she lowered her head down, as if ashamed. 

"When Hitomi returned, she went through a lot of 'episodes'. Some days she'd be calm, other days no one could control her. Her memory was also very jumbled, and when I asked her constantly where her pendant was she'd reply that she gave it to some boy. But after a while she'd say she didn't know where it was. I really didn't mean to confuse her, or lie to her, but I had to do something. So I gave her my copy of the same necklace saying it was hers, only mine isn't the original, though it looks much like it." 

Nathaniel leant over now, totally immersed at the growing tale, "And what were you hoping to accomplish by doing that?" 

"Just to calm her down," Hikoro hushed, feeling drained. "I know it probably wasn't right, but what could I do? She looked so confused; I just wanted things to be the way they used to! I had my daughter back, and at the same time… she didn't even feel like my daughter at all." 

**STOP**

"…." 

Hitomi let out a stutter of sounds but unable to form a word as she quickly snapped the stop button, the sound seeming to echo as it broke the demeaning silence. Instantly her eyes fell upon the bare of her neck where the glimmering necklace hung around. It was so very clear now, so very _explained_. Now, now she understood. Now one of the many riddles she had longed to answer was finally solved. 

Catherine and Yukari both let out simultaneous startled jolts of surprise as Hitomi brought the tape to a pause. Both of them had to blink blankly for a few long seconds, as they struggled to get their minds off from being engrossed in the capturing account. 

"Oh Hitomi!" Yukari's eyebrows knitted, focusing all of her attention to her soundless friend. She feverishly crawled across the beige carpet, sitting herself by where hushed Hitomi sat. She ducked down to stare Hitomi right in her expressionless eyes, clasping her hands to her friend's. 

"Oh Hitomi! This must be so painful!" She began to plead, raising her voice to get a response. "Don't listen to it dear, it's too much! It's in the past anyway, it's behind us all!" 

"No!" Hitomi's surprisingly quick reaction came as a shock to all as she also gripped Yukari by the shoulder and stared her down in the eye. Hitomi's emerald green pair glowed with an unexplainable sense, a powerful drive behind them. They buried themselves dauntingly towards Yukari's helpless burgundy specks. 

"Don't you get it, Kari? I'm _supposed_ to hear this; I'm supposed to remember!" 

Her words came out rash, and loudly as Hitomi quickly fumbled to whisk off her sacred necklace to hold it up close. 

"Look, I didn't even know that I had been wearing a false pendant for so many years, until _he_ gave the _real_ one back to me! It's coming together now, Yukari, and Catherine. The questions are being answered and the doubts are becoming truth. It _needs_ to happen." 

"But why? Why _now?_ Maybe you shouldn't remember, maybe you shouldn't know!" 

Yukari could feel a clamp nervousness overwhelm her at the sound of Hitomi's determination, at the knowing of the results. Her uneasy hands quickly blocked out any access to the stereo controls as she firmly placed them on the tape player. She could feel the blood draining quickly from her body, a light tingle crawling in her that made her sick inside. She remembered that day, that 'interview' day vividly well, and Yukari also remembered just what _she_ had said in her own interview, not far along in that very session tape. 

Cathy raised a brow at first as she watched the perplexing commotion, and slowly but surely, she began to realize Yukari's newfound fear. Yukari _knew_ what Hitomi was looking for, and there was more to it than simply 'remembering' things. Hitomi had a sense and that sense wanted to know the _reality_ behind Amano and Yukari's relationship to each other, whether Hitomi psychologically knew it or not. Just like Hitomi had said, _the questions would be answered and the doubts would become truth_. Hitomi could sense now that Yukari was hiding something, and both of them knew that whatever it was, the tapes held the answer. 

"What do you think you're doing?" Hitomi flashed Yukari an angry look as she watched her friend try to eject the tape as Hitomi hastily tried to stop her. "There's more, Yukari! I need to hear more!" 

"I think you've heard all you need to hear!" Yukari finally managed to grasp the small cassette in her hand, but found it futile as now Hitomi was practically scrambling on her, wrestling her arms to retrieve it. 

"Hitomi! GET OFF!" Yukari swatted defensively at her, trying to crawl away tucking the tape safely in her left hand. "You've GOT TO STOP THIS! You're the only who can!" 

"NO!!! YUKARI!!" Hitomi, still as focused as ever, somehow managed to master enough strength to continue to pin Yukari down as tried to yield a grasp on her left arm. "I'm not stopping anything, I'm starting it! Why won't you let me listen to it, huh? WHY?" 

"For your own well being Hitomi!" 

"Bullshit! My own well-being has to do with answering what I WANT TO KNOW. You have all managed to hide a LOT from me these last few years, but now it's time for those things to be revealed." 

Yukari angrily swiped away Hitomi's clawing hands as she quickly stood and backed herself against the wall unit. 

"Hitomi, I _took_ that interview under the assurance of knowing YOU would never hear it. That's what they said; that's what they told me! By listening to that damn tape you'll be... you'll be…" 

"WHAT? Huh?" Hitomi stood also, dusting herself off repulsively as she finally stepped back for a breath of air. "What Yukari… will I be hearing something I don't want to hear? Trust me, if it's _'in the past'_, like you like to say, then it shouldn't bother any of us right? RIGHT? Just give me the stupid tape Yukari, let's get this over with now." 

Yukari grimaced, continuing to back away as Hitomi came forward with hand outstretched. She could still feel the stinging pain all across her arms where Hitomi's nails had scratched against her. Why on earth did Hitomi have to be so damn violent? What possessed her now so angrily to retrieve that tape? 

"Come on, Cathy, little help?" Yukari turned towards Catherine's direction quickly as Hitomi crept dangerously closer and closer. 

"Sorry Yukari, " Cathy furrowed her brows in contempt, exchanging her focus between her two companions. "But I told you earlier, remember? I think it's time Hitomi knew, don't be afraid of it. It's not a _bad_ secret, I wouldn't be angry with you, and neither will she." 

Yukari blankly stared back at Cathy, unbelieving that she was now adequately outnumbered in this match. She could feel her heart anxiously twisting inside her, fearing the reaction of her best friend, and fearing the shame of truth behind it all. Could she really bear with it? Could she stand to listen to what she had willingly put away? 

"FINE! Go ahead, but don't blame me when you regret hearing it. I love ya Hitomi, and I'm sorry you had to know this." 

Hitomi's guard instantly fell, and she could feel the anger and annoyance slip away instantly, dissolved by a sort of pity, and compassion. Yukari thrust the tape at her chest, and quickly sulked past her dropping on the couch. Hitomi watched in a curious amazement as her long time sister-like friend bent over, head to her knees, almost looking kind of sickly. Yukari had a pillow tucked neatly against her chin, and her trembling, feeble fingers were hopelessly trying to block out the forming tears in her eyes. 

Hitomi felt sad, and a bit confused. What was wrong with Yukari? Why was her friend so _sad?_ It honestly hurt Hitomi to see her that way. Cathy had mentioned that what they were bound to hear was a _good_ thing, then why did it make Yukari cry in fear to hear it? 

"Ah Kari," Cathy instantly went over to the depressive figure, patting her back and turning her comfort once again to someone in need. "Don't ya worry about it, you don't HAVE to feel bad! It was years ago, like you said, we all understand." 

Yukari replied in nothing but a sniffle, still unable to look Hitomi, or even Catherine, in the eye. She couldn't bring herself too. She had been agonizing this moment for too many years in her life. In fact, she hadn't even figured that Hitomi would ever come to hear what she had worked so hard to keep secret. She never thought that her past, their past, would catch up to her faster than she could run. 

Catherine continued to pat Yukari on the back, feeling sorry for her. It must have been hard; Yukari had already been so worried earlier on about whether or not Hitomi had heard anything about their conversation. Now, here all three of them were, about to hear the full story, exactly as it was five and a half years ago. Poor Yukari, then again, poor Hitomi as well. Trying not to think of it too much, Cathy merely made a simple signal of a nod for Hitomi to start the tape where she saw fit. 

Hitomi sighed in return, feeling speechless to aiding her friend. She wanted to, she honestly did. Hitomi wasn't exactly the most pleasant of peoples at the moment, but all the same, she didn't _hate_ Yukari or even feel really upset at her. Yukari was her best friend, yet Hitomi felt she couldn't really say anything until she fully understood what all the emotion was about. And after all that had just occurred, she began to wonder just how much of this unknown twist did she really want to know. 

Nonetheless, Hitomi returned the tape to the player, and forwarded it until her senses told her to stop. Stop. It was there. It was where her senses told her it should be. What she desired to hear was now only held back by her will to hear it. Well, it was time for whatever it was, it was time. Whatever it may be that needed to be said would now be heard by all. 

**PLAY " Interview # 2**

"So you don't remember it at all?" 

"No," Yukari felt that same heaviness grow upon her again, as she felt pressured to agree but she knew she couldn't. The truth was, she _didn't_ remember it; she just didn't. As hard as she tried, as hard as even Amano tried, it was the same thing over and over again and that was all she could remember. 

"Like I said, I just can't remember _what_ Hitomi's talking about! I mean, she keeps talking about a dragon… and how we ran from the track to the Temple… and … and I just don't know!" 

Dr. Teroka nodded quickly, sensing the lost paranoia floating from his newest interviewee. Yukari Uchida had been on edge ever since their session had began only a few minutes ago. He could easily sense that Hitomi's statements and almost all of Hitomi's claims confused her. In all honesty, Dr. Teroka couldn't quite clarify it himself. Obviously, there was more than one side to this twisting story. Just why didn't Hitomi's version match up with Yukari's? How on earth could it be possible that two tellings of the exact same time and place could end up so oddly different? 

Yukari swallowed dryly, still feeling too unsure of herself at the moment to ask for a drink of water. Instead, she refreshed her uneasiness by examining all of the many plaques and diplomas lining Nathaniel Teroka's office wall. Gee, the guy sure was certified enough. At that rate, Hitomi was probably paying quite a pretty penny just to set foot in his office. 

"…so," Dr. Teroka continued, hesitant but still persistent to continue on with the confounding tale. "We've gone over what Hitomi thinks. She says that _you_ and _Amano_ had been with her at the time of her disappearance." 

"Well… we were," Yukari filled in. "But I didn't _see_ anything! I really didn't! I think I'd remember seeing a dragon or something weird like that, don't you think?" 

Dr. Teroka nodded, scanning through the many notes he had taken with Hitomi, searching for just one missing link to bring the mess together. 

"I agree, Ms. Uchida, but still, there has to be a reason why Hitomi says what happened is what happened. So you do not remember leaving your school track on May 3rd after a bright light appeared, accompanied by a young soldier supposedly named 'Van' and a large mystical creature which Hitomi describes as a dragon?" 

"No. I don't remember that at all. It didn't happen!" 

Nodding again, Dr. Teroka bit his lip in uncertainty. It seemed as if he had smashed right into a dead end. 

"You do not remember falling, and twisting your ankle? Or having Amano carry you up the Temple stairs to the Pagoda? Or when Hitomi claims the dragon was slain by that warrior?" 

"…no" Yukari felt her voice lose itself in negativity, once again lost in whatever Dr. Teroka and Hitomi had been talking about. "None of it. I can't remember any of it. I don't think it happened, I'm sorry." 

"Don't be sorry," Dr. Teroka sighed dimly, jotting some notes down as he tried to give Yukari a cheering smile despite the fact that in the last fifteen minutes he had made absolutely no progress. "I know this is hard, trust me, I'm struggling with this situation as well. I _don't_ think you're wrong Yukari, but all the same, I can't say that Hitomi's wrong either. You understand, don't you?" 

"I guess." 

"Alright then, now that we've confirmed that, tell me what _you_ remember." 

Yukari felt herself lighten at the thought of finally being able to say what she _did_ remember. She had heard Hitomi's story so many times over, it almost felt like Yukari was the one who was wrong! But how could she be wrong? She had lived it herself…. She knew what she had seen. But why didn't Hitomi agree with her? Why did their stories have to have such vast contrasts that led to their nasty fight a couple of weeks back? Just… why? 

"I remember telling Hitomi that our friend, Amano Nekuchi, was going to move to England before our track meet. She had these feelings for him, and I knew it and she knew it, and I was trying to tell her that she should tell him how she felt before it was too late." 

Dr. Teroka smiled a bit; quickly jotting something down noticing that so far, both Yukari and Hitomi's accounts were matching up. But how much longer would it be before their tales would take a drastic turn? 

"After that," Yukari continued. "Hitomi and I were in the locker room. Somehow, as hard as I tried to hide it from her, Hitomi just knew that I had feelings for Amano as well!" 

"Aha…" Dr. Teroka nodded proudly again, noticing that he was _right_ about Yukari also sharing the same feelings about this Amano, even if he knew Hitomi had been doubtful to believe him. But wait a minute; Hitomi had never mentioned _knowing_ that in her story, she had even been doubtful of it when he mentioned the thought… was this where the forked path in the mystifying tale lay? 

"So she hugged me," Yukari continued, her russet bangs hiding her concerned image. "She hugged me and said she just had to see _him_ again, she had to see _him_." 

"Oh…" Nathaniel Teroka couldn't come up with any forming words at the moment, scanning through the jumbles of ink confirming that none of what Yukari was saying ever seemed to happen in Hitomi's version. This hug… this confession to _'see him again'_ was totally missing from Hitomi's notes. 

"And who was she referring to by 'him'? Amano, do you think?" 

"I guess," Yukari nodded half enthusiastically. "But I'm not sure! It would make sense if it was Amano, but I don't know… I just got this feeling that it wasn't him. Just the way she spoke about me liking Amano, she didn't even seemed disturbed by it! It was like she never liked Amano, and there was someone else." 

"Someone else? You think this someone else was who she wanted to see again?" 

"Exactly," Yukari pulled back her bangs, and leaned back cautiously on the over-cushioned couch. Already, she was still trying to block out the memories of Hitomi's and hers argument from before. It still gnawed at her mind, even after they had become friends again. She just felt like Hitomi hadn't fully forgiven her. Hitomi was still upset with Yukari, in one way or another. 

"Do you have any clue who this 'someone else' could be?" 

"I wish I did. I'm not sure, it still can be Amano, but then again…" Yukari's voice trailed as she observed Dr. Teroka quickly scribbling things down. She couldn't help but wonder what was the point of the tapes with all those notes, but she decided not to let her mind get too distracted. 

"…uh… well, Hitomi's always talking about that guy you mentioned before. She's told me about that boy she says killed that dragon when I was 'supposedly' with her, the one who took her to wherever… that place…" 

Dr. Teroka studied Yukari carefully. He knew that Yukari knew that she was talking about the telltale world, Gaea, in which Hitomi claimed she had been residing in during the months of her disappearance. He also could tell that Yukari was hesitant to mention the details straightforward, as if Yukari was so doubtful of Hitomi's story, she didn't even want to repeat it. 

"Anyway, I'm sure you know what place I'm talking about. Well, when Hitomi was telling me about what happened, she mentioned that name, 'Van', a lot. I'm kind of foggy on all the details, because she said a lot of things, but I'm sure that out of all of it, that guy stands out the most. That's why I've been wondering if Hitomi was referring to him as the 'someone else' that day." 

"I see, but wait," Nathaniel Teroka creaked back on his chair rubbing his frayed beard-hairs as he mused on a variety of thoughts. "Hitomi had mentioned this 'see him again' part on May the 3rd at around noon, did she not?" 

"Yes, it was May 3rd when she said that, the last day I saw her… then." 

"Was it before or after Hitomi had gone to run that 100 metres for Amano?" 

"Before…" Yukari lifted a brow in curiosity to where Dr. Teroka was headed, and also in wonder on how he happened to already know so much in a strangely chronological order. 

"If that's the case," Dr. Teroka started up, once again tapping his pen furiously against his notepad in thought. "Then how is it that Hitomi would be referring to this Van character as the 'someone else' before she has even met him? According to Hitomi, she first met Van on the track during that 100 metre run, _after_ she had been in the locker room with you talking about Van as the 'someone else'." 

"I DON'T KNOW!!" Yukari's fists clenched in her uncertainty and a strange overwhelming feeling of miscomprehension. She felt like she was the one being blamed for lying, but she knew that she was doing nothing of the sort! 

"I told you, I'm not sure! I just had a 'feeling' she was talking about Van, and yes, I've noticed that that's probably not very possible since she hadn't even met him back then, but I don't know! I guess you just have to be me to see it in my view. It's either Van or Amano, and both make little sense if you ask me." 

Dr. Teroka nodded again, even a little satisfied at Yukari's newfound anger. It was usually when his patients grew upset with him when they were telling the absolute truth. Now, he felt confident in Yukari's testimony behind her theory, as unlikely and illogical as it was. 

"That' s alright there Ms. Uchida, I'm not saying you're wrong. I just wanted to bring up the point, I can tell that this is not easy to analyze. Look, why don't we get into something easier?" 

Yukari agreed a little more earnestly this time, trying to keep her eyes from fixating themselves anxiously on the clock hanging on the west wall. Yukari knew it was rude to gawk at a clock worrying about the time during a session with anyone, but she wasn't feeling all too pleasant or patient either. The past twenty-five minutes seemed like torture enough to last for months on end. 

"Okay," Dr. Teroka started again, flipping to a blank page in his filling notebook. He could almost sense the displeasure from his newest interviewee, and it was rightly so. Not many people enjoyed being in a psychiatrist's office when they don't even have to be, and apparently, Yukari Uchida was at the top of the list of those people. Thankfully, Hitomi didn't act as paranoid in reference to her own sessions. As a matter of fact, Hitomi was one of the most placid clients he had ever attended to. 

"Yukari, how do you feel your relationship to Hitomi has changed since this timely occurrence in your lives?" 

Yukari swallowed bitterly; this question didn't seem to be any easier. 

"It has changed a lot." 

"Do you mind elaborating on that?" 

"Well, I don't really know what else to say. I don't think me and Hitomi are as good of friends as were before though." 

Nathaniel listened on sympathetically, "Well, that's hard to say… what makes you believe that Ms. Uchida?" 

"Lots of stuff. Our big fight first of all, that was the first climatic fight we've ever had! She was screaming at me and everything, and we didn't talk for three days. I know that may not sound like very long, but in Hitomi's state of being at that time, it felt like an eternity." 

"I see. Just what had this fight been about?" 

"Basically it was because I was being really skeptical on all those things she was telling me. Yeah, yeah, I know as her best friend I should have been more supportive, I DO feel a little guilty, but still. She was really eccentric, I guess I was afraid." 

"Afraid because your best friend just appears again out of nowhere, after you and your friends had just begun to accept that she was out of your lives for good?" 

"Exactly. We had been grieving over our loss of our friend for months. Everyone had to deal with a lot of trauma; just passing by Hitomi's empty locker and memorial in the school halls got me crying for days and days. I missed my friend, and having her come back as suddenly as she left was … scary." 

"So you think it was that initial 'fear' to the strangeness of the situation which made you skeptical of her account of the Time?" 

"Yes, that's just what I mean," Yukari had to focus to hide her smile, she didn't want to look too happy, but she was delighted to know that Dr. Teroka caught on a lot faster than she had betted on. 

"I was just so astounded by her return, it made me skeptical of everything, and very close-minded. Yes, I think I did react badly towards her, but it was hard for me too! We eventually became friends again after I called her up." 

"Did you call her out of guilt, or concern?" 

"Both. I felt bad for what I had said, and at the same time I was worried for her progress back into normal life. What kind of best friend just sits in the sidelines anyway…" 

"Well, I'm happy you made the right decision. It proves that you guys have a great friendship you know." 

"Yeah, that's true. It's still not the same though; I don't think it can ever be the same again. I sometimes get the impression that Hitomi still holds my doubt and my actions against me." 

"It's easy to feel that way, and natural. It'll take time before the air clears, but if there is something, the two of you should definitely take the time to sit out and discuss what's on your minds. The more you do that, the more quickly you get back to normal life." 

Yukari nodded sighing a bit, pulling her silver ring on and off her index finger repeatedly as she thought of the Time. Just thinking and talking about it was such a trying effort. She felt so anxious to leave, anxious just to be 'gone' from here, but now she also felt like something was still holding her back. Yukari knew there was a window of opportunity here, a window which was fast shutting if she didn't make a move and make a move quickly. 

"There's something else…" 

Dr. Teroka lifted his head hurriedly, alarmed to see that his once timid interviewee was now leaning towards his desk initiating the fact that she had something to say. It wasn't often teens like her would decide to be the one to confide in him. 

"What would you like to say, Yukari?" He cocked his head sideways giving the best listening-look he could master. 

Yukari, still feeling totally unsure but knowing she was too far into it now, ducked her head as she quickly tried to search for the words. It couldn't be that hard, as long as he… as long as he never told Hitomi. 

"You can't tell Hitomi this. Please sir, tell me you won't tell her." 

Dr. Teroka bit his lip in surprise, studying Yukari's forlorn expression with her pleading eyes. It was obvious just by looking at her that there was more to Yukari's tale than she let on, and now it was apparently not something that she was fond of sharing with Hitomi. But what would she say? If it were critically important for Hitomi's well being, then he'd have to tell Hitomi. But then again… 

"Alright then, Yukari, I won't tell Hitomi your secret, if you're still willing to share it." 

"Yes," Yukari stated the word slowly, but still semi-confidently. "Yes I am." 

"I'm listening." 

"Okay… um.. I guess, first I have one question for you. Can you tell me what Hitomi thinks of Amano, I mean _now?_" 

Dr. Teroka sighed a bit, as his head shook slightly. "Ms. Uchida, you know there are some things I just can't share with everyone. Why, Is it urgent?" 

"No not really," Yukari dimmed, trying to hide her disappointment. "But it would be helpful. There's something Amano and I never told Hitomi yet, and it makes me feel so bad inside. I figure you've probably heard of situations like that before." 

"Yes," Dr. Teroka agreed lightly. "I have, of course. But it depends on the situation; what was the issue in your case?" 

Sighing Yukari finally quit fiddling with her fading ring, as she brought her head up a bit. She didn't know if Amano would be upset with her for telling this doctor about the situation at hand, but then again, it's not like Yukari saw Amano Nekuchi very often anyway. He was just acting so distant now… so different…and then again, so was she. Things were very different now. 

"The day Hitomi disappeared," Yukari began. "Amano or I really never knew where she went. I asked him, but he never saw her leave. So I guess we just presumed that she had to leave for somewhere… you never think a person is literally _gone_ until maybe after a week, or two, of time. So anyway, I was still thinking about what Hitomi had told me about Amano. She had given me that last inspiration to say what was on my mind. At that time, I had believed that that would be the last day I would ever see him, Amano, again." 

Dr. Teroka shifted positions intrigued by the plot forming around Yukari's words. Surprisingly enough, his notepad still remained completely blank, knowing that the image of him scribbling away like mad may be too distracting and intimidating for Yukari to continue on her story. 

"So I told him, just flat-out you know. He was really nice about it; in fact he said he had some of the same kind of feeling-things for me and he would miss me. Well, it wasn't long before Amano got word of Hitomi's disappearance, so his father decided to postpone his flight to England for maybe another half-year. After all, we had all seen high school together, and dozens of track meets, so it was quite the impact for a lot of people when we got the news. I myself was just… in shock. I told Hitomi that, but I never did tell her who was there for me when I was there for her." 

"I see… because of Hitomi's relationship to Amano it made you hesitant to mention it?" 

"Yes, but more! How would it sound like if I told Hitomi that while _she_ was gone to who knows where, I was out having dates with _her_ crush? It sounds pretty bad. But it wasn't like that. There was more to it, and I can't deny that. I was horribly saddened at that time, and so was he. We were two people lost in a wave of emotion, and after the downs, there's got to be ups right? Weeks were passing, and they were hard to see through. There had to be something to help us out through that, and that was simply having each other." 

Dr. Teroka took a breath, and gave her a supportive smile. Her voice, Yukari's voice, had been wavering for a while now, aware that she was longing to stop herself but the thoughts still kept pouring out. He was amazed at just how much she managed to hold back from Hitomi and practically everyone else. 

"So we began seeing each other two months or so after she was gone. When she returned we had to take a break, obviously our relationship was not priority at that time. But we're thinking of getting back together again, but it's hard really, I feel so horrible about the whole thing. With Hitomi and all… she does know though. She knows I'm seeing him every now and then and stuff, but Hitomi just thinks it's a little goof-ball pair kind of thing." 

"The two of you are more serious than that?" 

"Oh yes. I do think so, as sad as it is for Hitomi's case. But it's the honest truth! There's something great between Amano and myself, and as fulfilling as it is, the sight or thought of Hitomi all alone drives me to madness. Amano _does_ care for her, but I don't know anymore. I feel strange being seen with him… especially around Hitomi. She's just so fragile now, and what we do seems so wrong." 

"But it's not wrong Yukari. If you're feelings are true, then it could never be wrong." 

Yukari sighed once more, lowering her eyes as she felt a tightness clamp her heart. Could he be right? Was Yukari not wrong for feeling the way she felt? Was it truly her desire to feel that way… hmm… no it couldn't be. Just how could it be right? How could it be right when Hitomi was the one who deserved him… Hitomi was the one who _needed _him… there was nothing Yukari could do, even if she wanted to. 

"Ms. Uchida?" 

"I'm sorry, It's just _wrong_, sir. I know it's wrong. I should have never fallen in love." 

**STOP**

Yukari's tears were warm, mellow and warm. Her arms were like ropes loosely hung, barely within enough support to hold themselves up. Yukari, the beautiful Yukari, now looked drained and challenged in a way Hitomi had never known. She had never known, she would have never guessed. 

"Yukari hon, dry your tears. I'm not mad at you." 

Smiling softly, Hitomi continued to embrace her friend, feeling those abundant tears soaking through the tip of her cotton sweater. She didn't know why she felt so empathetic at the time, wasn't Hitomi the one who was supposed to be breaking down into sobs? Wasn't she the one who should have been yearning for a shoulder to lean on? But she just couldn't sense those selfish desires at the moment. Hitomi didn't _want_ this to be an issue, she wasn't going to make it an issue, and she most definitely did not want this to be a burden against her best friend or her husband-to-be. 

Well, she did have to admit it. Hitomi really hadn't been fully prepared emotionally to hear what she had just heard. All of it, just to know _all of it_, was more than she had counted on, probably more than she could handle. It hurt her too, punctured her inside… the trust as if broken… the memories as if scarred. But to put it simply, Hitomi _had_ to put it behind her, back to the past where everything belonged. There was no time to deal with Hitomi's emotions, there were already so many to deal with, so many things to deal with. Poor Yukari; poor Yukari feeling impended with guilt… 

"But Hitomi…" her friend's reply was so soft and so uneven, it was hard to hear naturally, but still rung out quite loudly in the room's awkward silence. Yukari was still sniffling uncontrollably, fingers trembling in an odd sense of fear she couldn't quite describe. Even after it was finally over, even after Hitomi had taken her back in with forgiveness, it seemed as if worse. It seemed nothing was the same! How could it be the same? Merely minutes ago, the words had never been spoken, and things were right that way, as they had been for so many years. But what is to happen now, what is to happen the next time they would all be together again? Hitomi, Amano and Yukari… would it still be the same? Would it be the same with each one knowing the darkest secrets of the other, each one a little less trustworthy, each one a little less trustful? How she could even look Hitomi in the eye again with an expression of dignity, for clearly now, she had none, if anything, left at all. 

"Please don't worry," Hitomi continued to pat Yukari on the back, watching sympathetically as her friend's sobbing breaths slowed. "You have nothing to be upset about, and neither do I." 

Yukari's teary eyes glared back at her, glistening and moist, with a look that was heart-wrenching enough as it was. Rubbing the drying tears away from staining her face, she sat back and took a breath, sorting things quickly in her mind as she bit her lip to calm herself from breaking down again. 

"But Hitomi… I… I can't believe you _know_. I never wanted you to know, I'm sorry!" 

"Why…?" Hitomi turned to face her friend, giving her a pleasant smile as she continued to conceal her own thoughts, her own personal outlooks to unselfishly aid her friend in need. "You can't be sorry for the way you truly felt back then, Yukari. Dr. Teroka taught me that. There's nothing wrong with love." 

"Nothing wrong with it??" Yukari continued to hide her face away guiltily, picking off the lint from the sofa arm to avoid any eye contact. 

"Listen Hitomi, I dated Amano for almost two years while you were in your most fragile state!! Do you know how stupid that was of me?? I should have never been so selfish, I was only thinking of myself." 

Hitomi shook her head slowly, standing herself up smiling at Catherine, realizing that she was still there watching also. 

"You _were_ thinking of Hitomi, Yukari," Cathy seemed to catch the signal, and joined the conversation by sitting carefully on the sofa arm, laying her hand on Yukari's shoulder. "Hitomi knows it, and so do I. You didn't mention that one part in the tapes, that both you and I know." 

"What part? Oh that…that's not important…" 

"Oh yes it is Yukari, it's much more important then you think," turning from the depressed figure, Cathy focused her attention to Hitomi standing alongside. "Hitomi, do you know what Amano and Yukari did for you?" 

"No…" Hitomi replied softly, still smiling, still in awe on how she managed to be so incredibly docile at a sudden realization she would've normally been upset about. "But please tell me." 

Cathy nodded, staring down at Yukari who agreed helplessly, and faced Hitomi once again. "Listen Tomi, while you were sick, or undergoing counseling, Yukari and Amano were still kind of in love. But Yukari had just told me the reason things didn't work out between them was because both of them cared too much for you." 

Hitomi blinked silently for a few seconds, wondering how that would work out. 

"Is this true?" 

"Yes," Yukari tucked her bangs behind her ears, and semi-smiled with look of improvement. 

"Amano and I felt that you needed us to be there for you. Hitomi, I knew and he knew that it wasn't right for us to be together. We were your friends, good friends, and on my priority list, you were above Amano and myself. You needed him, and till this day I don't regret my decision." 

"Ooh…" Hitomi tucked her hands dormant within her sleeves, and thought about it warily. They had done that for her? That was why they had broken off their relationship? Hitomi remembered being relieved when Yukari and Amano had broken up so long ago, and yes she did have to admit being a little jealous and nonetheless upset back then. But still… if she had only known how much, how so very much they had cared for each other and her, she would have never dared wish for anything to ruin their relationship. Yes, Hitomi loved Amano, but just because of that it didn't mean Yukari had to hide her own true feelings. If only she could have done something about it… how would things be like now? 

"… thank you…" Smiling now, she just had to smile. Once Hitomi thought it over, she knew _why_ she wasn't upset. There was nothing to be upset about. It only went to prove that Hitomi's friends, best friends, were genuinely one of a kind. No matter what, she was still astounded to know that they would always be the greatest of greatest friends to her… from the beginning of time right until the end. 

"Thank you Yukari, thank you very much." 

Yukari's eyes widened suddenly and instantly dried at the sound of Hitomi's calming words. She glanced upwards quickly, also standing herself and returning that smile. Returning that elegant smile of her wonderful companion of so many years. Not only had Hitomi gone that extra hurtful mile to forgive, not only did she struggle to oversee her own darkened past, but Hitomi had also ventured onwards to learn Yukari's side of the story, to truly understand the pain that not only she had to endure, but Yukari as well. And here, at what Yukari had supposed to be the most challenging point of their friendship… Hitomi was thanking her. She was thanking her. Forgiving her. Understanding her. Thanking her. 

"Hitomi, you're wonderful," whispering the words, Yukari flung her slender arms around Hitomi's neck embracing her again, enthralled to know that the hardest times would still have some of the best of times with friends that were as always so dedicated and devoted as Hitomi. Where had she found the strength to accept Yukari's actions, where had she found the compassion to understand her own pain, and understand Yukari's as well? It was yet another unfathomable and unforgettable bond between friends. 

Hitomi returned the hug, and beckoned Catherine to come over as well smiling end to end. Well, Hitomi couldn't believe how the day was playing out, with all of its emotional ups and downs. But still, how very perfect it was anyway, with such perfect companions. Hitomi grinned and even laughed a bit with happiness as the bundle of weepy bodies grew and joined her laughter. It seemed strange almost, odd and unpredictable, but also bizarrely fulfilling. There was something definitely fulfilling about knowing, about knowing and understanding. There was something that had filled an invisible void in her relationship to Yukari and Amano, which had sealed a hole that had hurt her without knowing, and now strengthened her at the knowledge of. Something about this cleared a burden off of her… and a burden off of everyone who had been haunted by something, which hadn't really hurt her too much anyway. Was Hitomi really pained, inside? She didn't know really, and a part of her longed to never answer that question. Even if it did, even if it did hurt her somewhere along the line, Hitomi would rather not feel the pain. She'd rather question the outstanding friendships she owned; she'd rather not doubt the foundation that had been built. She understood now, she understood more than she had known and had been willing to know. But still, as yet there was one more thing she didn't know. There was still a void, still a hole, somewhere within her. There was still a call, a loud and unheard call, summoning her to answer it, telling her that life could only continue with it known. Now was the time. Now was the time when Hitomi's thoughts would no longer be hidden away, now was the time where things would not be hidden away from Hitomi. She couldn't leave it unanswered for any longer. Hitomi now knew the beauty of _knowing_, and she knew ever since the ventures of her visions, and the eccentrics of her morning acts, Hitomi wouldn't be at peace until she knew for sure. She had to know. She still had to know. 

Feeling the quickening release of Hitomi's presence from the giggling group, Yukari refocused her attention drying the last of her dried tears away on her sleeve. She turned and watched the shorthaired woman walk over and stand by her bedroom door, turning to face their dazed images. 

"Sorry guys, I'd love to stick around with you, I really would, but I have to get going. I got up pretty late didn't I? We should just hang out and have fun later, now that everything's back in place." 

"Yeah!" Cathy heartily agreed, making her way to the coffee table in search for cookies carefully stepping around Naria, who had somehow managed to fall dead asleep in the middle of the kitchen floor. Finding some crackers instead, she offered Yukari some, still smiling. Wow, had that just all happened? She also couldn't quite believe how well things had gone over. Just like everyone else, she had been preparing herself for an emotional battle, similar to the antics of the morning. But this day had gone unpredictably as well, and frankly, she was just happy that now it was an unpredictable twist for the better. 

Yukari sat herself slowly on a dining chair, nibbling bit by bit on a handful of crackers lost in thought. She was still thinking to herself, still wondering and remembering, though she made it her business to keep her thoughts unspoken. Yes, Hitomi may have known, and yes, the angel of a woman had taken it well, but that didn't mean Yukari was now apt to share just about everything. There was still so very much that had not been mentioned and that was rightly so. Yukari had forgotten a lot too with time, but as the day went on the more and more influenced she was to remember. The more and more she remembered, the more and more she recollected on the many dinners… the more and more she remembered the midnight talks… the more and more she remembered the dances… the first kiss… and the last… and the more and more Yukari sickly began to miss it. 

Trying to shake out the occurring nonsense from her mind, Yukari quickly turned her attention back to Hitomi, who had suddenly emerged from her room fully dressed as if she were going to work, with the usual knee-length forest-green skirt and crisp, white blouse. 

"Are you heading off to CGU Hitomi? I hope you're not in too much trouble for being late…" 

"Well, we'll see…" Hitomi smiled unsurely not too fond of agreeing exactly as she shuffled through the many hangers in the jacket closet in search for her own. Honestly, it hadn't even occurred to her to drop by the office for a few hours of work, not once at all. Then again, she couldn't see why she would want to return there. Even if she might be in a little tribulation for skipping out today, it just didn't seem to be her concern at the moment. No, why would it be? She couldn't even think of it. There was something stronger now, something so much more important. It was calling her. It was calling to her. She had to find him. She would have to find him. 

"Hitomi?" Yukari stood by her friend and gave her a questionable look. "Are you going back to the office?" 

There. The last lace was fastened on her boots, and now it was only a matter of unbolting the apartment door before Hitomi could finally be free to answer her strange longing. She suddenly realized Yukari was talking to her, and turned to face her once again. 

"No, no I'm not." 

"Ooh…" Yukari nodded expressionless, not knowing on how to go about asking just what was Hitomi up to. It seemed strange for her to just "pick up and leave" after all that had just happened. Didn't she want to talk about it? Discuss it? What about the radio mess in her bedroom? She had never really fully explained what that had been about, or the session tapes either. Now that she had heard them and understood that brittle secret, why wouldn't she question it? Yukari didn't know how eager she was to share the information, but for Hitomi to just 'forget' about it didn't seem too right either. 

Sensing the lost yet concerned look plastered on Yukari's face, Hitomi merely unfastened the chain lock, and opened the door to the empty apartment corridors, the green floor carpet still glowing underneath the dim fluorescent lighting. Once she had stepped out and adjusted her coat buttons, she finally turned to give Yukari that one last smile. 

"I know it may seem strange right now Yukari, but I do have to go. You see, I have to see him again. I just have to see him again." 

Yukari's eyebrows narrowed at the words, as she anxiously gripped the door frame, watching perplexed as Hitomi spun around with hands in pockets in direction of the elevator. 

"But Hitomi!!" Yukari stepped out also, watching the disappearing figure full of confusion. "Who are you going to see?? Amano?" 

Yukari nearly choked at the thought… if she was going to see Amano, what would she say? Yukari had never thought of that; she had never even begun to imagine how he would react once the news of Hitomi's 'knowing' spread around. It had been a frightening enough experience in her case… but things still had unraveled in her favour. Would Amano happen to be as lucky? 

"No," near the middle of the hall, Hitomi finally brought herself to a halt slowly realizing that Yukari had asked her a question. "Don't worry, it's not Amano." 

"Oh no?" Yukari had to hide her breath of relief. "Then who??" 

Smiling Hitomi turned again and began walking, hands in pockets, mission in mind. 

"Him, Yukari, _him_. I told you, the tapes would answer everything. Think about it. I'll be back later." 

The elevator doors swooshed to a close noisily, and Yukari could still hear the old mechanics of Meadow Gardens Apartments hard at work. She leaned herself casually against the textured wall outside the door of 5B, biting her lip in inquisitiveness. What on earth had Hitomi meant by any of that? The tapes? Why had she brought them up… what could they answer… 

As Yukari shrugged she finally made her way back in the apartment, greeted suddenly by the smell of Cathy's delightful cooking already underway. Quickly, longing to help out in her day of free time, she began to bolt the door closed when suddenly… it occurred to her. 

_"I have to see him, I just have to seem him again, Yukari."_

Those words…. Those very words… _now she got them_. She had heard them before… Yes she had. Yukari's colour drained at the thought of it, remembering those tapes now, remembering with remarkable accuracy. It couldn't be… how could it be… was Hitomi really…. 

She stopped herself by the kitchen entrance, puzzling it over, realizing the many clues hidden underway. 

It had to be. 

There was Hitomi's vision just this morning… the destroyed radio… the song "Unforgettable" which had gone so well with _'him'_…. 

The pendant. The pendant which had been given to this _'him'_, this boy, and which Hitomi had somehow gotten back. 

Then there was that character, the character that had been mentioned in the tapes with her interview with Dr. Teroka… 

But wait a minute… that was years ago, many years ago. How could it be that Hitomi would still be thinking about it? How could she… it's been so long, so very long since… since the Time. There was no way that everything could just be coming back to her out of nowhere… could it? Was there a chance that all of their mysterious pasts were now coming back to them all? Was that a good thing? She had been acting so strangely lately… but why? Why now? Everything was going so right… wasn't it? But what was this newfound sense drawing her friend away from her? What was this pulling force that was tearing their worlds apart? Hitomi felt so… distant now. Even Amano didn't seem to talk with her that often… where was Hitomi now…. Why was she leaving them? Who was she leaving them for? Who was this character, this _'Van'_, that seemed to mean so much to her best friend… that seemed to be pulling her best friend further and further each day as these memories returned to them all. 

Hitomi Kanzaki, Yukari's best friend… 

Where was she now? Where was her life now? Where was she going? When would she get back… she wasn't going to be gone for long, would she? Hitomi wouldn't leave it all behind… would she… could she… Did this mean that it was real; all of those things she had said were real? Was it all coming back…. Or was she leaving … again… would Hitomi leave them in her new trance, would Hitomi forget them with her new priorities, unlove them with her new friends… her new desires… 

Yukari's heart tightened at the thought, feeling the darkness of it. What was she thinking? Was Yukari _actually_ now believing the reality behind Hitomi's aged story? Was she actually considering that those people Hitomi had once been so fond of talking of, that place Hitomi had often dreamed of, were real? How could they be? How could they be coming back after all these years? It made no sense!!! But still… if it didn't make sense, then where was Hitomi going? Why was she leaving? Why was she acting so strangely? She wouldn't leave them again… she just can't leave them again! Not now! Not with everything that mattered to Hitomi… the wedding, the friendships, her whole life… she'd never abandon it just like that. Hitomi would never do that… 

Never… 

Would she? 


	12. Angel

**12.) Angel**

**_When We Meet Again by Lovely Videl_**

**PART ONE - The Vision -  
  
** _ Spend all your time waiting  
  
for that second chance  
  
for a break that would make it okay  
  
there's always one reason  
  
to feel not good enough  
  
and it's hard at the end of the day  
  
I need some distraction  
  
oh beautiful release  
  
memory seeps from my veins  
  
let me be empty  
  
and weightless and maybe  
  
I'll find some peace tonight.  
_

There.  
  
Well, that was the last of it, the very last of it.  
  
Van looked in a strange content at the bolted luggage case sitting perfectly amongst his fixed bed. Yes, it was done. He was pretty much sure that everything was in there, well, the little that he had anyway. It really wasn't much more than a few pairs of shoes, three or four outfits, and other appealing knick-knacks, which Shied had kindly given upon him to keep. Still, somehow the used baggage case managed to exceedingly bulge past his liking.  
  
Van sighed a bit, feeling the wetness of his hair slick back handsomely dripping onto his new bathrobe, still breathing in the warm steam that floated in from the hotel bathroom. Yes, he had just enjoyed his last mesmerizing bath in that wonder of a hot tub, cursing the fact that he couldn't somehow just teleport that giant hunker of a thing along to Gaea. Well, he had managed to make it a personal goal to drag along each and every miniature shampoo or soap bottle he found lying around, although Van had adequately noticed Merle had practically hogged all of them. And with all the fur that girl had, Van couldn't help but groan over the thought of all the miracle shampoo vanishing within a day or two.  
  
Standing and stretching his figurative arms above his head, he couldn't help but let his eyes somehow fall upon his luggage case once again. It was still there, still bulging, as menacingly as it had since he had first managed to bolt it shut. Damn thing. how could it be so plump like that? Van barely had any personal items to begin with; even Merle's suitcase wasn't as horrible looking as his was.  
  
"Well, let's see here." Van muttered to himself, sitting back down on the bedside and working carefully to unbolt the latches. Almost instantly the lid of the case popped open backwards, automatically unleashing a flurry of unorganized disproportioned clothing items yearning to escape from the chaotic state they were in.  
  
Van's face reddened sheepishly; happy to know there was no one else in the hotel room to notice his poor packing qualities. Well, seeing as he had a whole day to himself, Van knew he might as well repack it again. There was no need for an honorable king of a proud country to return to his homeland without even knowing how to pack his bags. Geeze. Van sure never realized how pitiful he could sometimes be. He would never take those handmaidens for granted again!  
  
Separating a clean pile of socks and white dress shirts, and listening to the quiet race of clocks ticking against each other, Van's mind couldn't help but wander a bit. He had been alone for quite some time now. According to Earth time, Shied had dropped by four hours ago to pick up Merle; he had been planning to take Merle to the beach for a while now, despite the chilly weather. Merle always had some sort of fascination in shorelines; he had noticed her attraction to the sea since they had first visited Palas long ago. Van could never resist her cuteness when she would dig around through the sand, or build miniature castle forts, or race the waves endlessly during high tides.  
  
Gosh. how he truly missed those days. It just seemed strange for it all to be so different now. Were things really changing that abruptly, or was it just that Van was still living back in the past? Was his mind too stubborn to accept the change time had brought about? Well, Van could be stubborn sometimes, but he was reluctant to notice just how stubborn he was with Merle. Honestly, as hard as he tried, Merle was still that kitten-girl to him. He couldn't get his mind to grasp her in any other way. She was still young, she was still exuberant with energy, she was still pawing for his attention and Van would have to drag her alongside wherever he went.  
  
He sighed gently, pausing his movements for a second to reflect, and shove aside his stubbornness to allow a bit of sense to seep in. Van knew now that what was then was no longer true. Merle, his very best friend in the entire world (or appropriately universe in his case) just couldn't be viewed as a "kitten" any longer. She didn't build sand-castles anymore, she didn't race around dangerously in the castle halls on all fours, she didn't hang off upside down from the handrails, or shred the main dining carpets with her claws, and she no longer flung her arms around his neck in that rewarding joy every time she saw him. Well, that may have been for the better, with the young lady she now was, Merle would be fully capable of knocking him off his feet at that maneuver. But still. still. Van missed it. It seemed too different now; it was that difference which he couldn't bring himself to accept. It was like when he would return to the hotel after a hard day of researching and lugging around information for Shied, only to find Merle completely immersed into a book, training herself to read past the pictures, and stopping only momentarily to greet him in the form of a mumble if he were lucky. Not to mention that while on earth, she had grown even more accustomed on simply calling him "Van"; he had never been so fond of the little "Lord" title, but even then it had always been expected. until now.  
  
He had actually tested her today. When Shied had arrived early in the morning, Van merely greeted him with the usual smile, listening to Shied explain their plans for the day to visit the Sea of Japan. He had said something about the sailboats being out, and that there was actually some sort of historical ship fest today. Merle had listened in with anticipation, packed her bags, left them aside, and simply smiled at Van as her and Shied made their way to the hotel lobby where Angela Ferentini awaited them. That was it, just a smile, and their usual morning breakfast of cereals and toast. There wasn't even much of a conversation then. not much more than a few words of what they were packing and what they would leave behind. That was it. Merle hadn't even asked if Van wanted to come along; why, she didn't even hint it in any way whatsoever!  
  
Van's heart began to drag with it's own weight. feeling heavier upon the burden of letting his mind view things openly for once. Why was he thinking of this anyway? Why was he letting it bring him down? Maybe it was all in his mind. maybe he was just being overcautious or something. sure Merle was grown up now, and yes, she's only bound to become more independent. It didn't mean that she would abandon Van anytime soon, and just because she hadn't invited him for the day. it didn't go to say that she didn't love him anymore or anything. That would never happen! Never! Maybe she just needed some space was all. she just needed to be apart from him to explore life on her own. He would have to let her do so some time, right? He would have to. Things are always that way; you should always be prepared to let something go.  
  
Van leaned back a second, hearing the bed creak under his weight, wondering why he had just thought that. It really didn't make him feel any better at all, as a matter of fact, he felt even more depressed than before! Why was it that it had to be that way? Why was it that eventually, you have to let everything go? Van had been letting go of enough lately. he had to deal with enough. but not Merle too? Wasn't there anything Van could hold onto? Wasn't there anything or anyone that would always be there. always and forever? It didn't seem now that there was much in life that Van wasn't bound to lose.  
  
Sighing once more, Van ran his hand through the slickness of his hair, feeling that instantly it was drying and fluffing out the way he liked it to. Ha, he always loved how these Earthly soaps could make him feel so clean. Van was absolutely certain that he had never smelt better before in his life! That's not to say that he stunk of course. but heck, if one had to picture how a swordsman's scent is like after a battle, that would be your typical Van on a daily basis. He didn't even think there was anything that could make him smell so much like flowers without having to roll around pointlessly in a meadow or something, and he's seen that done before! All the poor women up in Gaea, what would they would only give for a drop of lotion or an ounce of conditioner. Speaking of, that was actually Shied's gift to his Aunt Milerna. He had bought her a whole expensive cosmetic and perfume case, filled with artsy looking things Van could never comprehend on using. Shied's only comment was that: "_She doesn't need it, but she'll like it."_  
  
Shied had gotten just about everyone a present for their return home; his especially since he had been gone much longer than they had been. Van and Merle had accompanied him when they had gone "shopping" a few days ago. Van had never seen a more hectic scene in his life in comparison to a mall. Hell, even the core of Fanelia was a ghost town in comparision to Aimsa Ridge Shopping Centers. They had "sales" just like in the Fanelian markets, but they took the word SALE to an extreme! They calculated percentages and everything!! It was so bizarre! They had spent near to three hours alone just ogling the food court!  
  
In terms of presents, Shied had also gotten Milerna a few pretty dresses that Merle had helped picked out, teasing Van about being "fashion- blind" since he couldn't tell one apart from the other, and held no interest whatsoever. All he knew was that they sure showed a lot more cleavage here than on Gaea. frankly, he didn't even know if it was _legal_ for a woman to wear such demeaning items! And he was a king to top that one off. but he had to agree on one thing, Shied had bought his aunt some very beautiful and equally expensive gowns, which suited the princess quite nicely as a matter of fact.  
  
Ha, but when the thought of what to get Shied's father came along, Van couldn't help but joke about renting a barber. He still laughed at the thought; Van just couldn't help but take the opportunity to ridicule Allen Schezar whenever possible (it was a mutual thing, they had grown fond of it). Shied had also purchased a violin strangely enough, which was much more expensive than Van had thought for a musical instrument. Still, Shied had insisted that his Aunt Selena was always dreaming of playing music, and they all agreed that the violin was a suiting piece for Selena Schezar. Selena. Van still had to hide his shudders from the sound of the name. Yes, yes, he knew, he knew, it's been over eight Gaean years since the errr. "transformation" had occurred, and he probably should be getting over it by now. But Van just couldn't!! He just couldn't! Don't get him wrong, he still found Allen's sister to be an incredibly nice person (she got along so well with Princesses Milerna and Eries) but Van wouldn't be caught dead with that woman alone in a room. NEVER in his life. Why? Well, he couldn't explain it really, how does one explain having a strange sense of discomfort around someone like her? He figured he was just afraid that while alone with the small woman she would suddenly go whacko on him or something. and .. and.  
  
Van shut out his thoughts for a while. He was getting awfully rude, and less productive with his repacking. Actually, he hadn't even finished "unpacking" to begin with! Yes, he truly could be pitiful at times. really, awfully pitiful.  
  
"Heeey." Van's eyes fell upon something interesting, as he continued to sort out the piles of socks, pants, underwear, and towels. "I don't remember having that."  
  
His eyes continued to narrow as he dug through the amazingly growing piles of shoes in his case, trying endlessly to get to the bottom, where a slight brown fringe continued to daunt him. Gee, what was that? Brown? Van didn't own any brown clothing; usually just white, black, navy or maroon. But brown? Maybe he had packed something of Merle's by accident.  
  
"Agh. stupid jackets!" Van cursed his new track jackets angrily, as he struggled to pull them out under a pile of corduroys, which was the only thing that was heavily weighing upon Merle's shirt, or actually it had looked more like a skirt really. When had Merle gotten that? He couldn't help but wonder. Shied must have bought it for her or something.  
  
"Aha." Van breathed in relief as he finally managed to fold the damn corduroy pants and set them off to the left, lifting up the case hood again to fetch the last item within his case, which wasn't even his to begin with.  
  
There it was.  
  
Van just stared at it blankly for a second thinking to himself; that _really_ didn't look like it belonged to Merle at all. It just didn't look like Merle's; and funny thing was, Van just had a _feeling_ it wasn't Merle's. It was a brown skirt as expected, and when he lifted it up in his hands it came undone in little triangular like frills, which rolled into a petite brown kilt-like thing which looked like it could fit Merle, but it just _wasn't_ Merle's. It just wasn't!  
  
Still holding it, Van's eyes fell back downwards to spot another item which had laid hidden underneath the skirt; the matching overcoat to go with it, and underneath that, a crisp, white dress shirt.  
  
Van cautiously placed the kilt aside, and picked up the beige overcoat with brown cuffs and a brown collar with a white stripe, and the buttoned down dress shirt accompanied by a pinkish bow, staring at them with a strange sense of disbelief. Now when on earth had he gotten those?? He didn't remember packing them! Van had just packed a few minutes ago. and if these things were at the very bottom of his case. it must have meant that they were the first things he had packed. _But they weren't._ Van distinctly remembered packing the huge corduroys first, only because they were so bulky and heavy, that they should be kept on the bottom of the case. He did NOT pack anything before that, he was certain of it. Absolutely Certain. When Van Fanel is certain of something, you may as well spell it all out in capital letters:  
  
_ HE DID NOT PACK THESE THINGS.  
  
_ Van's eyebrows darted upwards worriedly, as he continued to study the clothing with a rather forlorn expression. He had seen clothing like this before; a lot of young teenage girls wore them around here. Shied said that they were uniforms, school uniforms which were mandatory. Shied owned a boy's pair as well. But what on earth would Van being doing with these? Or Merle, for that matter? They had never purchased them, and Van doubted you could even buy school uniforms without being in the school.  
  
His hands continued to glide over the rough material, looking slightly aged now that he thought about it. The dark and retired patterns resembled an older version of the school uniforms the girls of Earth were wearing now. This one looked older. it looked older and used and.. and slightly. familiar.  
  
Van couldn't put his thumb on it, but it did. These clothing items: the shirt, the coat, and the kilt together. they reminded him of something. sometime or someone? But what or who?  
  
Still frazzled by the puzzle, Van began to lay out the different accessories along his bed in a strange order, placing the dress shirt within the beige overcoat, and buttoning the overcoat together, flattening out the pockets. He gently pulled out the shirt collars from underneath the coat, and placed that bow on top, looping it together as best as he could, then finally adding the kilt. That must have been it. That must have been how the uniform looked like. Wow. holy crow, yes, yes! He did remember it. He's seen it before! From somewhere. But how? This didn't seem right. This didn't _feel_ right at all. How did it get there? Why did he have this connection with it? Who had put it there!? Everything was so strange. just what was any of it supposed to really mean?  
  
Van swallowed dryly.  
  
He started to notice something. The room was growing hotter.  
  
He shut his eyes twice, as they started to instantly moisten over, almost crawling against his skin like a dripping sweat. The vision of the mysterious uniform before him began to blur, the room instantly heating out of nowhere, the refreshment from his bath started to instantly disappear. It didn't feel calm and cool any longer, it. it felt hot, very hot, and almost. suffocating.  
  
"Ugh." Van rubbed anxiously at his face, trying to get the wetness from blurring out his eyes, standing up momentarily to try to clear the air of the newfound humidity. Was this normal? Was it supposed to be getting this spontaneously warm? It felt sickening really. it felt really sticky, scary, sickening.  
  
Van reached out quickly as his balance wavered, to steady himself by the nightstand. That notion was instantly reversed as Van yanked his hand back off the table's surface as the once cool wood scorched the palm of his left hand in a searing pain of heat he just couldn't understand. The surface of his palm continued to burn and stung like needles; the disorientation of his view continued to fog his mind like an intense migraine: pounding, circling, vibrating. The strange humidity in the room had grown to a suffocating level, making the sweat beads form so suddenly on his skin, his hair dampen and crown his face, his breath endlessly panting and rapid.  
  
Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud.  
  
Instantly, in his concerned worry, he noticed the sound of his panicked and frustrated heart instantly steal over the scene, deafening Van's paranoia as his footing continued to hesitate, his vision became blinded, his throat became caught in the gasps of his breath.  
  
Damn, just what was going on?? Why was it so hot??  
  
The questions barely filtered through his mind. barely even considerable with that loud sound, the persistent and rhythmic sound. unending sound.  
  
Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud.  
  
Van's moist hands brought themselves up to his face, continuously clawing against his eyelids, pleading helplessly with himself to regain his vision, falling to his knees in exasperation, heat draining him.. Slowly.  
  
His pupils began to dilate. His breath began to slow. His mind began to think.  
  
What happened?  
  
Van's throat tightened with worry and confusion.  
  
What in the hell just happened? What WAS happening? Why . why was it so damn warm? How did it even get that way?  
  
Van lay himself on the ground in a frightened curl, the wooden tiles still eerily hot from the experience, his breath slowing but still far beyond normal, hands still stinging from the nightstand. eyes still blinking rapidly trying to clear the blur that constantly came over them.  
  
He felt scared.  
  
Van felt scared; it was a feeling he neither enjoyed nor experienced often. It was a new fear; it was the definite fear of the unknown. Though recuperating, his heart continued to madly echo in the walls of his chest, his fingers continued to tremble in his uncertainty, his mind too at debate to think clearly. Van couldn't think of much at the moment. He didn't know what to make of any of it. He couldn't make anything of it; he didn't even know what "it" had been. Van was confused, and scared and frightened. It was one of the only times in his life, and strangely enough, he had no clue why.  
  
Van's eyes continued to dilate without him noticing, his pupils managing to blacken the reflection in his eyes, an overpowering feeling of fatigue drenched his already limp body, easing his paranoia, almost soothing his anxiety.  
  
He was now so _tired_. Van was afraid, Van was confused, Van was tired. He was tired of the few seconds of strangeness he had unfortunately had to see through. He was tired.  
  
His muscles began to loosen, his breathing became slower, his eyelids became heavier.  
  
Then suddenly in the strange distortion of silence, Van blinked once.  
  
Twice.  
  
Then all went black.  
  


* * *  
  
_ "I'll never forget you Van, I promise."  
  
"Van. I'm doing just fine."  
  
"I've got to go warn him, I've got to warn Van!"  
  
"Van came to save me?"  
  
"I love him, I love Van."  
  
"I'll never forget you Van,  
  
I promise."  
  
  
  
_

They were so quiet that the words almost felt as if they were being whispered in his ear. They sounded so sweet, so solemn, so quietly hushed in the relaxing solitude, that Van couldn't even bring himself to think straight. He didn't seem to really comprehend or understand, or even care for that matter, where he was or what he was listening to. Van simply cared only to listen to that voice ring softly in his mind, listen to the soothing tone and envision the memories that slowly began to scathe his thoughts.  
  
Round and round the words continued to flow, continued to enwrap Van in his unknown state of being, compel him as he floated without much thought in his mind, incapable of bringing himself to panic or worry. Instead, Van merely lay or stood or sat, not too sure but not too caring, just longing to remain silent and listen. All Van wanted to do was listen. He really didn't know what he was listening to, or more so to whom was he listening to, but whatever it was, it yearned at him to be heard. Van couldn't do anything much about it now, he was here with these whispering thoughts and persistent memories and all he could do was listen.  
  
Blackness.  
  
Nothing but blackness began to engulf him, nothing but blackness and sweet spoken words:  
  
_ "I Miss You Van."  
  
_ He shut his eyes, and let them rest, and felt his heart cool to a slow and contented pace. Van's palms no longer sweated with anxiousness and confusion, but he was now lost in the satisfying tingle of relaxation and quietness. All of this peace. and quietness.  
  
Even amongst his closed eyes, the silent Van, the noble Van, began to see without his knowing. In merely instants he could see the rugged outline of a young person before him, just a blur amongst the black. But still, that strange calmness overflowed Van, and called to him in a strange sense. He felt himself stretching towards that dancing figure before him, movements gracious and fluent. He was drawn to it, drawn to its beauty and voice whispering his name.  
  
_ "I've Missed You Van."  
  
_ Then things began to change.  
  
Van's surroundings began to grow lighter and lighter, until a gold glow seemed to illuminate the atmosphere as if being filtered in from a window. The voices continued to soften, continued to hush into his mind until they blended entirely with the new sounds that seemed to be appearing out of nowhere, that seemed to be constantly growing louder.  
  
And there were new voices.  
  
Van's eyes opened, and he quickly felt his feet land heavily against a ground, a floor, a surface, at last. The feeling of the impact seemed to knock the mystifying wind out of him, until Van could sense his senses returning. He could feel the strangeness of the room he was now standing within, the warmness of the afternoon sunlight split into rays by the window blinds, could hear the soft conversation of total strangers penetrating his ears and constantly growing louder.  
  
Someone, or some others, were here with him.  
  
Finally grasping the full extent of his presence, realizing for once that Van was now immersed into an unfamiliar and uncertain situation, it wasn't long before panic began to easily arise in his emotions. For one thing, Van didn't know where he was, he had no clue what had just happened, and he didn't know how he was to get back to wherever it was he had left. This strangeness, this unknowing, this mistrust, was beginning to get the better of him.  
  
These voices. There were people. But who were they?? WHERE WERE THEY??  
  
Van's breathing began to pick up his pace, his levels of alertness sharpened to a cue. Instinctively, his right hand jutted quickly down to his side, where normally his trusty sword and sheathe would have hung had the circumstances been different. But now, in these uncontrollable happenings, Van's hand was left only to collide with the air and leave him with the mere defense of himself.  
  
_ "He was very important to you, wasn't he?"  
  
_ The aged, male voice came in stronger now, alerting Van's ears from behind him. Quickly turning himself, Van couldn't help but notice in surprise the weight of his legs, feeling the thud like dumbbells crashing to the ground as he brought his feet around in lugging steps.  
  
A man sat there before him, entirely aloof of Van's presence, or maybe even uncaring towards it. Nonetheless, he continued to have his hands clasped tightly in his lap, hidden underneath this thick, unappealing gray sweater vest, spending a few seconds each minute to adjust his thin framed glasses. His attention now was focused entirely in front of him, and Van could just about swear that this man was looking straight through him, completely unaware that Van was even there at all.  
  
Nodding his head slightly, the young king finished his examination of the perpetrator, and decided that there wasn't much to fear here. Although Van was still in question on where he was or even how he had arrived here, it didn't seem to be possible for him to communicate to this man, even if he tried. The way that this man's eyes were totally undirected towards him even though Van was merely a few feet away signified that somehow in that unexplainable manner he was invisible. Van couldn't put a sense to the thought, but it was apparent that Van was everything but apparent.  
  
_ "I guess so; I guess that's something no one will probably ever understand."  
  
_ Another voice.  
  
That voice.  
  
It was that voice!  
  
Van lugged his feet over once again, following the direction of the stare of the man's eyes, and found himself face forwards to another character, a young and melancholic looking girl, sitting only a few feet away. She possessed that voice which had unexplainably triggered Van the second she had spoken. Her words, her tone, so soft and mesmerizing. It couldn't be, could it?  
  
Van's eyebrows rose with curiosity, straining his eyes to focus on this young woman more clearly. She didn't seem to see Van either, and with that, Van figured there was no reason to hold back. It seemed to them that Van was like a particle in the air, just _there_ yet unnoticed. It was his opportunity. It was his opportunity to see for himself.  
  
Fighting the strong lag within his legs, Van began to make his way over to where the desolate figure sat, basked to an almost golden color by the filtered rays through the office window. As closer as he became, the more he noticed her moistened emerald green eyes, the more he saw the hesitant way she tucked her chin beneath her coat collar, the way her slender fingers anxiously gripped the armrest of the chair she sat within, and the more he noticed how incredibly familiar she was beginning to become.  
  
_ "They can never understand me, Dr. Teroka. I don't think they ever will."  
  
"Who won't understand you? Why do you think that?"  
  
_ Van paused for a second as he continued to listen to the conversation, which omitted him and involved him at the same time, continue to grow. He stood now so close to that girl, so close to her heartrending image that Van couldn't come to control all the thoughts burning into his mind, scorching into his being.  
  
There was something about her.  
  
Van didn't want to say, he didn't want to admit it, and he didn't even want to _think_ it.  
  
But the thought was definitely there.  
  
Her sweet yet saddening voice, her once bright green eyes, the cropped mahogany hair that could never hide them, struck Van the second he had seen it all. Was he crazy for thinking it? Was he crazy for wanting to think it, to believe it even?  
  
His hands clasped together, his breath seemed to leave him, and the thought remained to dwell. Just. could it be?  
  
Suddenly, even against his will, Van could feel his arm outstretching; he could feel his hand reaching towards the dreamy image he couldn't believe. It was like that night, that fateful night not too long ago now, but long enough ago that Van could barely believe it had occurred. The more he thought about it, the more he figured the park and the dazzling display of snow was just another figment of the dreams he would always create. Everything that was too good for Van was much too good to be true. He couldn't have been here; he just couldn't be here again. with her. It was like a moment he had always anticipated but would've never thought to come true.  
  
Then, it happened.  
  
Van's fingers, gentle fingers, nervous in a way, graced over the fine skin of the girl's right hand on the armrest. Van couldn't believe it, but it was true. The no more than realistic feeling responded to Van's senses, informing him that yes, there was someone directly in front of him, and she was real enough to touch with his own hands. Just the experience, just the touch, sent rivets through him that he couldn't control.  
  
Suddenly, the girl smiled. She smiled almost faintly, but in her day of gloominess, a smile as faint as can be was still well notable. She had gotten a sense, she received them often, but now it was more comforting than usual. Her left hand graced over the back of her right, and it made her stop and think for a moment. It made her think, remember and long.  
  
_ "No one will understand me. They all think that just because I'm back everything's fine now. But it isn't. They don't even understand where I've been all this time, how much less will they understand who I truly am now."  
  
"Oh Hitomi, I see what you mean. You must feel so isolated."  
  
_ Hitomi. what a beautiful name.  
  
Van let out a breath, and continued to watch her thinking of her name, thinking of her response.  
  
_She had smiled._ She had smiled when he had touched her! Could she. could she have known?  
  
He waited anxiously for her response to the doctor's statement, remembering suddenly about Shied mentioning to him about some sort of sessions Hitomi had had in the past. Did that mean. Did that mean that that was what Van was watching? Could it really be? Could it really be her in the time _after_ they had last been together?  
  
The thought struck Van strongly, and suddenly it seemed to be to him like his only priority. As he sat in front of this now younger girl, he couldn't help but notice that yes, this image, although more saddening than he remembered, was still the very same picture that had filled his mind and thoughts and dreams even against his own will. It didn't seem possible, but now it was the only thing that Van wanted to believe. He wanted to believe it. He wanted to know for a fact that this girl before him had been the same one that somehow seemed to fill his life, back then, back a few weeks ago, and even until that very moment.  
  
He wanted to believe it.  
  
He did believe it.  
  
_"Yeah, most of the time. But I. I know he does. He understands me."  
  
_ The man opposite of the young girl smiled broadly.  
  
_ "I'm sure he did, Hitomi."  
  
"Yeah, Van was a great friend. I mean, I have great friends here too, but it's hard to say the same nowadays. They don't even seem to want to be my friends sometimes."  
  
_ Oh Hitomi.  
  
Van's eyebrows began to knit themselves with worry. The simple way the young girl seemed to lower her eyes, slightly glistening, began to inflict this sort of pain to him for some reason. For some unknown cause, Van felt his heart heavy, although he should have been happy to see his friend again after so long, to see what had become of her. But her sadness was so easy to sense, even when she had just mentioned his name. It was a lonesome tone that Van was beginning to direly worry about.  
  
Still though, he was still trying to get all the facts through his head. This was the girl. This was the very girl on one fateful night he had just happened to crash into. It would never have occurred to him the impact she would have on the way he thought, acted and felt. Even after she had left him for good, Van would have never come to estimate the way his eyes would soar to the skies so often in his spare time. He would have never counted on the dozens of occasions when he would be out by the plains and just stare at the two rocks in the sky, wishing only, thinking only to himself what he wanted to keep for himself.  
  
But yet, the days continued to be empty, and the only thing that he could ever see was that memory, that permanent vision of bright eyes and cheerful smiles, which he would run to in times of need. That was when Van would realize that he missed it. He just missed it all. He missed protecting someone, and guarding someone to the point where it would mean his life. He missed feeling that sense of pride each time he would wake to another day and see his new friend there, safe and sound, knowing that for another section in time, he had managed to keep her well. He missed feeling that urge, that mission, to keep her happy, to help her and serve her and care for her in a way that was totally unnecessary, but strangely, was his only drive for so long. That instinct, that newfound desire had grown in him secretly so much so that in the end, he had used it all to accomplish the last of his desires: To let go. Had it been his choice, it wouldn't have gone that way, but it wasn't his choice. His drive was to make her happy, and her happiness was not in his home, but far on her own. Van could understand that, and Van had thought then that he was fully capable of letting go. It was only until he learned that those emotions he didn't even know were essential to life were lost for good, did he understand that he had let it slip away. Opportunity passed him by so often, but it was always his reluctant and quiet style of life, which held him back. Sometimes, Van hated himself for it.  
  
Look at her now; she's so young.  
  
She was so young, and at the same time, she was just like him but different. Hitomi was different now. She had moved on without him. Van was too late.  
  
_ "I know he meant a lot to you Hitomi, but I think everyone needs to know one thing. You've been so saddened lately you know. Hitomi, do you understand that everyone is just trying to help you out?"  
  
"Yes,"_ her answer was dryly cold, almost malicious even.  
  
_ "Then, I only have one thing to ask: Do you feel that this relationship which you had with this Van, is strong enough to push you forward, or will it always seem to leave you dwelling in the past?"  
  
_ The girl didn't answer, and the more Van thought about it, he couldn't bring himself to answer the question either. How could he, without blankly bringing out the truth? It seemed that this young Hitomi was the same.  
  
As he lowered himself carefully, Van was at awe as he came near to face-to- face to his unaware friend.  
  
There she sat, quiet and unresponsive, still ducking her head downwards with that tiny glisten in her eye. It saddened Van really, to a point where he had to salvage the courage to keep his head from turning the other way. It seemed the more he watched the mysterious drama play out; the more depressed everyone seemed to become. Her image was one so lonesome, so gone along a world of confusion, that Van began to sickly understand. He could almost see it now, he could almost feel that shared pain which had been thriving through the both of them for so long. Now, he could almost understand her side of the unending tale. He could feel the weight being so pressured on this young Hitomi, the doubt behind her stories that Van knew were true. But this man didn't seem to believe it, and judging by the expression on Hitomi's face, it looked as if no one did. It was that look, that hurt face, which made Van cringe inside.  
  
_ Hitomi was hurt.  
  
_ This girl, this girl whom Van had fought so solemnly for to protect from pain and needless suffering and sadness, was now caught in the depths of the very things he had fought against for so long ago. Van had worked so diligently in the short time she had been with him, the short and meaningful time, to make sure that the cheerful smile she seemed to always posses would be there day after day. And being the king that he longed to be, Van was the one to keep his vow. He did keep her safe, Van kept her as content as well as he could possibly, and he had accomplished his very mission of missions. Van's concern for her well being had stretched to such an extent that for her very happiness he sacrificed letting her go.  
  
Then why?  
  
Why on earth was she so sad?  
  
If he had worked so hard to making sure she returned to her home of happiness, why was it that now, her image could almost render him to tears if he weren't careful? Why was it now that her tone was darkened, her smile erased, her vibrancy lost? Why couldn't he protect her from this sadness anymore? Why was sadness befalling her when he had worked so hard on making sure that wouldn't happen? Why was everything leaving her sad in the dusk? Just why?  
  
This Hitomi looked as if she had lost her very soul within her. The expression so unwritten, which lay upon her face, clearly signified the bouts of emptiness that now began to rein her being. That tone, that look, that broken heart. just why did it have to be so sad? Just why did Hitomi have to be left with nothing at all?  
  
But sadly, Van did notice that he had left Hitomi with something. There was only one thing in this world which this young, disheartened girl had managed to keep: the lone tear, the small glisten, in her right eye, for even now because of all her crying, most of her tears had left her all alone as well.  
  


* * *  
  


The seagulls cried noisily overhead, and the ocean currents rang a soft sound through the cool breeze. It was nice and warm out, refreshing by the waterside. The sun also was bright and cooperative for the day, shining proudly in the wake of the morning.  
  
Van's feet touched lightly on the ground, and he stood still, and motionless for a few seconds too many.  
  
Van knew the question that was now burning his thoughts: What had just happened?  
  
He noticed instantly that the almost familiar surroundings of the small office and his friend of old times had disappeared without his noticing, fading so quickly into this new background of sunny marmalade skies, and a breeze with such an aromatic scent that could carry on for miles. It was much cooler and relaxed than where he had just been, but nonetheless, Van still had that longing to return. He had become so accustomed to seeing her right there before him, that even these few seconds of absence were already wrenching at his heart. He wanted to make her happy. He wanted to find her again.  
  
_ "Oh Amano. don't you wish we could stay like this, forever?"  
  
_ The soft voice caught Van by surprise, and instinctively, he brought himself around to face it.  
  
But something else caught his eye.  
  
For the first time, his vision befell amongst his still and beautiful surroundings. His mind had been so occupied on realizing what had just happened, that he hadn't even taken a good look at what _was_ happening.  
  
Van now stood solo in the bask of the morning sunlight, ankle deep in the mowed green grass center of a large oval of red. Van's eyes studied that strange continuous pathway split by the white lines, and instantly he began to recognize it, along with the towering willow trees, empty bleachers, and resting arena lights.  
  
Van was within the center of the track of the school he had seen only twice before. As his eyes followed the unending trail, he came across the very spot, which had been burnt into his memories. There, off to his left, was the very spot where he had first met Hitomi Kanzaki so long ago. That small space of land in a world so large and unfamiliar could easily mean the world to him. Had he not come at the right time, had he not landed in the same place, how would his life have changed? Would Fanelia cease to exist without the aid of Hitomi so many times during the course of the battles. would Van cease to exist without Hitomi at all? And yet. who had planned this? Surely, something as wonderful as two friends from distant places meeting on a whim, couldn't just have "happened", could it? How was it that two spirits so far apart yet so close in need of each other, could just happen to meet out of the blue? Van was usually not the kind to play the game of luck, but he must have been winning it in that space, right there, that very night, long ago.  
  
_ "Hitomi, you read my mind."  
  
_ At the sound of the new voice, at the mention of the name, Van was reminded of his calling. Instantly, he continued his turn until his eyes fell upon two dark silhouettes surrounded by the light of the morning sunrise, staring out into the vast expanse of water of Tsutomu Lake, reflecting gorgeously the light of the bright sun before it.  
  
There she was.  
  
It was awfully bright, and the surrounding scene was still quite breathtaking, but Van wasn't slow to notice the prettiest aspect of it all. There Hitomi stood, further away this time, leaning herself against a wire fence near a taller figure. Her hair was much longer now, much more like the way he remembered seeing her. not too long ago, in that mystical park of lights. But it wasn't layered, it was fully down and shoulder-length in a way he had never seen her before. She still looked young, but older, and more serious than he remembered her from the past. But what made Van's day was the look on Hitomi's face. No longer were her eyes crowned with tears, moistening endlessly in a feeling of hurt and pain; but instead that friendly glow had returned to her, her smile lifting his spirits as it graced her beauty end to end.  
  
She was staring at someone, the figure standing next to her.  
  
Van lifted his head for a second, and spent a few moments studying the man that Hitomi was with. Van wasn't too sure, but he recognized this guy. from somewhere. But who was he?? Well. now that Van thought about it, he did kind of resemble Allen, and then again Van couldn't help but try to hide his conniving snicker. Well, poor guy! But in all seriousness, Van still couldn't exactly pinpoint just what about this man seemed to rub him the wrong way. Then Van understood. Yes, he knew he had seen that person before, now he remembered. It was that same guy Hitomi had been with the day Van had first met her. She had been with one other, that girl, and this was the guy who constantly referred to Hitomi as "Kanzaki" so long ago. But right about now, it was only him and Hitomi. The other girl was no where to be found, as a matter of fact, no one else seemed to be around at all.  
  
_ "Oh Amano."  
  
_ Van's look seemed to recoil as he observed Hitomi loop her gentle arm through Amano's, in a comfortable sort of way that Van couldn't help but strangely react to. He didn't know what it was exactly, but it was a feeling Van couldn't bear to repress.  
  
That man, Amano, stared lovingly back down at the young lady, sharing that smile which she gave upon him. Her eyes seemed to sparkle like the water's crystal surface, and with a soft sigh she rested her head amongst him arm, and gazed out amongst the scenery alone with her thoughts.  
  
Van just watched plainly, tucking his hands into his robe pockets (not even realizing that he was out in public in a bathrobe though thankfully somehow invisible), and lifting his head to the cool, ocean breeze as he watched the two romanticizing silhouettes. Van didn't bother pretending as if he didn't see them. He could see them plain and clear, and although that funny, teasing feeling still seemed to manifest within him, he did as he usually always did with emotions he couldn't understand. He hid them. He didn't want to ask himself what he felt when he saw Hitomi with this man, because it was something he didn't long to know or even to understand.  
  
_ "You know Hitomi."  
  
_ Van tried to hide his relief, as the man, Amano, slowly backed away from the beautiful girl, and instead faced her laying his hands on her shoulders and gazing his attention towards her.  
  
_ "I may not be able to promise you 'here'."  
  
_ He brought his hand up to her chin, and wiped away the bangs from her eyes. Hitomi herself seemed to freeze with time, holding her breath and staring the young man deep in the eyes, everything unmoving except for the breeze of the wind and the crashes of the waves on the shoreline.  
  
".But I can try to promise you 'forever'."  
  
Van held his breath and watched in stunned amazement, feeling that writhing envious passion continue to grow within him as the scene ahead continued to swivel in a twirl of unexpected romance.  
  
The man, Amano, was now scrimmaging madly through his coat pocket as Hitomi watched with green eyes gleaming earnestly. Finally, his hand seemed to run against something, and his face lit up with a smile, and taking the object in his hand, the man, brushing a wisp of brown hair away from his face, slowly lowered himself to bended knee.  
  
Van swallowed with discomfort.  
  
He could feel that feeling at its peak now; feel the clench of his fingers within his robe pocket, the heat of his face fluster in this otherwise tranquil scene. Van couldn't explain it, but he _recognized_ it. He recognized that motion, for it was the very same routine done over in Gaea. Plus, Shied had already informed Van of what would happen after this. Van already knew about the marriage, but to see it play out before him, to see it all for himself, Van was forced to experience that feeling of a strange pain and anguish that he couldn't honestly define.  
  
_ "Oh my.!! Amano, you must be."  
  
_ Hitomi's face paled and her hands instantly rose to cup her face, beginning to easily tremble with nervousness. Even the dancing rays of the sun couldn't blind out the surprise and sudden joy, which seemed to have been blessed upon her.  
  
Amano took her hand carefully, fully balancing on his left knee and gazing still up to Hitomi's image, blended into the beautiful skies that shone with colour. His eyes grew with sincerity, and he had to pause himself to try to catch the intensity of what he was doing. Although he had already given it so much thought, still the moment seemed to catch him on a blank.  
  
Van watched the seriousness behind the man's face, and observed the excitement that seemed to rivet his young Hitomi. Her hands were endlessly quivering now, and it looked as if she hadn't blinked in her suspense for the past few minutes.  
  
Amano grappled the small, slightly velvety box in his hand, and closed his eyes in anticipation as he quickly opened it, hearing the satisfying creak as the box came apart revealing the shining gem within.  
  
_ "Hitomi..."  
  
_ Still holding her hand, he tried to control his voice from overpowering him, and gazed into her eyes, staring at the gems that lined his heart, and he had to think carefully to find those words he had planned for so long.  
  
_ "Hitomi, I've loved you for what seems like an eternity, but I must ask it now before it's too late:  
  
** Hitomi Kanzaki, will you marry me and stay with me, forever?"  
  
**_   
  
The breath seemed to depart from all three figures simultaneously as the words hung in the air like a faint scent. The only moving object was the sparkle within the diamond encrusted in a ring of gold, slowly being placed on Hitomi's slender finger, as Amano continued to look up at her with signs of hope and emotions of care.  
  
Van blinked suddenly; there was something wrong with his eyes.  
  
Hitomi stared at the beautiful object gracing her right hand, and tried to hide the sounds of her heart thudding madly in what she would have never expected or been fully prepared for.  
  
Marriage?  
  
Van blinked again. There was something definitely wrong, and he could feel it swelling in him like a sickness. He could feel the pouts of his face turning downwards like a saddened image; he could feel the wetness overcome his eyes, and the soft rasping breathing taking over his chest.  
  
_ "Amano."  
  
_ Hitomi, after long last, seemed to regain her thoughts and will, and finally stared back towards the young man which had held her captive for the last few moments. Her thoughts were burning and sizzling within her, but still, she tried hard to focus and concentrate them all. She was just so.  
  
_ "Oh Amano, of course I'll marry you!!!"  
  
_ In merely seconds, that once hesitant expression Hitomi wore had disappeared entirely into an outburst of joy and disbelief. Waking up from her state of shock, she flung her slender arms around Amano's neck, laughing merrily as instantly he stood up taking her with her, balancing her within his hands and lifting her in the cool air.  
  
The two laughed and spun with cries of joy, Amano encircled the field grass as he lifted her up with the cool breeze, her face seemingly even more beautiful with the dance of the sunlight. Her smile was accented brightly, and her laugh rung out more soundly than the birds in the air. It was more perfect than he could have ever imagined.  
  
Even as their laughs and renditions of joy seemed to quiet and fade. Van still continued to feel the wafts of jealousy and envy, which had been consuming him for a while now. But more so, on top of it all, he continued to sense that wetness crowd his eyes, that sniffle in his lungs, an uncontrollable urge of sadness and rejection that he had hardly known before.  
  
He knew it was just a vision, he knew that these were happenings that were bound to happen or had happened already beyond his control, but still it pained him just the same. All of those emotions burnt down, the hopes extinguished, the dreams left discarded. It was loneliness, true and utter loneliness, and never had he experienced the true colours of the words until now. Until he felt left alone with nothing.  
  
"But just look at her," The words billowed softly from his mouth, gazing in that sad contempt of his as he watched the loving pair slow down to an affectionate hug by the fence side. Yet, despite the pain that seemed to inflict upon him, he just couldn't get himself to tear his moistened eyes away. He couldn't.  
  
_ She was so happy.  
  
_ There she was. Hitomi Kanzaki, smiling from end to end. How could he stand to be upset? Just minutes before, her tears had rendered him helpless, but surely not her smile as well? No, of course not. Van wasn't that selfish; he could never be that selfish, even if he tried. After all, he had gotten what he had worked for. He had worked to keep her safe, to make her happy for as long as he was alive to ensure it. And now, no matter what Van felt or regretted, it looked as if he had done just that.  
  
Hitomi's smile was immeasurable, and her laugh seemed like a melody to him. She breathed her sigh of relief with that look of content; lay her head down lovingly on Amano's arm. The breeze ruffled her auburn hair, making her eyes shut with happiness in the pleasing silence and wonder of the world.  
  
Van continued to watch. Heartbroken.  
  
Then suddenly, Hitomi lifted her head. She peeked her eyes just above Amano's shoulder, staring about her unsurely.  
  
Van continued to watch. He held his breath.  
  
Resting her chin above Amano's shoulder, Hitomi still continued to peer about her. There was something apparently bothering her, or indicating her, and it was obvious that she couldn't really identify what that was.  
  
Van watched as the man, Amano, nudged Hitomi quietly and questioned her about something. Hitomi merely replied with a little smile and a careless shrug, yet it was obvious that her eyes were still trailing further, beyond what she knew she wanted to see.  
  
Then, Hitomi's eyes froze.  
  
Van watched in a clear amazement as the young woman, with eyes of earnest green, stared straight at him.  
  
At first Van worried if he was just seeing something, maybe even envisioning something that he wanted to see, but actually Van was wrong.  
  
_ She was staring straight at him.  
  
"Hitomi, what's wrong? You okay?"  
  
_ Amano stroked Hitomi's shoulder with concern, still gazing at her with that look of puzzlement.  
  
Hitomi didn't respond. Instead her eyebrows furrowed with curiosity, and her eyes narrowed trying her best to focus.  
  
Van continued to return her stare, feeling his heart begin to quickly race within him, feeling the burn of her eyes sifting through him.  
  
_ She saw him.  
  
She was looking straight at him.  
  
"Hitomi! What is it?"  
  
_ Suddenly, Van felt a chill as Hitomi's engulfed eyes quickly blinked and turned away from him hesitantly. In only moments, as she smiled at Amano and carelessly shrugged, it seemed as if nothing had happened at all.  
  
Van's hopes instantly dimmed.  
  
Then suddenly, his feet began to rise  
  
Feeling that saddening throb within him, Van gave a last glance downwards in the beaming Hitomi's direction. He tried for a second, and managed to force himself to smile. After all, how could he be so down to see her so happy? It would be wrong of him to be so selfish, though he'd always feel that loving selfishness inside no matter how large his smile outside may be.  
  


* * *  
  


The blackness swallowed him again.  
  
It still seemed warm, and awfully damp.  
  
Van was returning back to normal life, or at least he thought he was, he hoped he was. After all of this, he started to honestly wonder just how much more could he possibly take. All of these mind-boggling "journeys" to the past he wasn't a part of, was just so damn incomprehensible. It couldn't be real, could it? And even if it were, why would he need to see all this? He had known about it anyway, but what was the urgency in having to have to see it all play out for himself? Why didn't Van want to see it all play out for himself? Why did he feel so discarded, so afraid to know anymore?  
  
Suddenly, the sound of a large horn flooded his mind, to a deafening scale whereas it rang through his whole body.  
  
_ It wasn't over yet.  
  
_ The sound began to grow louder, and Van could already make out the high shorts of screams in the background, piercing and warning.  
  
_ "Hey watch out!!"  
  
_ The horns continued to blare, like the horns of cars outside. The screech of tires flooded Van's ears although before him lay nothing but darkness. Still, he could hear the piercing cry of metals shearing into each other, he could make out the horrible aftereffects of collisions, one after the other, screams of mortality and pain.  
  
Just what in the hell was going on?  
  
He continued to hear it. Wails. Siren wails, loud and echoing, panicked voices exchanging worried thoughts and concerns. He could hear the sounds of the streets of the Mystic Moon almost die down to a scary silence, surrounded by nothing other than the resonance of flames licking away at something, burning something, and faint screams and pleas from elsewhere.  
  
Something horrible had just happened and Van was blind to it all.  
  
What was he seeing, or more so hearing, now? This couldn't have happened before, could it? What was this accident, if it was an accident, was this why it was so hot? The drenching heat from the flames of death? But why couldn't he see it, why couldn't he see what he couldn't prevent??  
  
In his worried sickness he couldn't understand, Van blinked once.  
  
Then twice.  
  
Then all went white.  
  


** PART TWO - Journey of Risk -  
  
**_ So tired of the straight line  
  
and everywhere you turn  
  
there's vultures and thieves at your back  
  
and the storm keeps on twisting  
  
you keep on building the lies  
  
that you make up for all that you lack  
  
it don't make no difference  
  
escaping one last time  
  
it's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh  
  
this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees  
  
_

The streets seemed too empty.  
Everything just seemed so quiet today.  
Or then again, maybe it was just because Hitomi didn't seem to be a part of the scene at all. Although she was physically waltzing on down Mikako Ave., there didn't seem to be a part of her that realized it. Things just went on, things just _happened_ and she was perfectly unaware of it. For instance, just where was Hitomi going? It was a thought that had been bothering her ever since she had left her home more than two hours ago, and it was obvious that even now she still hadn't gained the answer to her question. Usually, Hitomi would never just go out and travel all the way from Meadow Gardens to downtown Aimsa on foot without clearly losing her mind. She barely enjoyed the trip on train, so what on earth could possibly compel her to walk the whole distance? Then again, Hitomi wasn't so sure if she'd _already_ lost her mind! Maybe she had. It was pretty chilly, very lonely, and probably even dangerous. She didn't even know where she was going. She must've lost her mind somewhere along the line.  
  
Directing her gaze to the sidewalk ahead of her, Hitomi still couldn't bring herself to stop. Nothing seemed to compel her to move forwards and nothing seemed to hold her back. And so, with that strange underlying thought, she just followed the path her feet made despite how tired and hungry she started to become. The spring chill was starting to get to her, but she simply tucked her hands further into her pockets and that already seemed to be the answer to her problem. She didn't notice the coldness anymore.  
  
The scenery began to change.  
  
The commercial buildings began to grow taller and taller, towering over her reflecting the morning sun with the beautiful glass casing. The traffic on the streets began to grow denser, although to the vague Hitomi, it still seemed just as desolate as before. Crowds of all kinds of people began to brush by her, fending for sidewalk space, and the signs around her grew large and more detailed with either English words or kana characters. Hitomi found herself pausing more often at red streetlights, still unnoticing to how crowded it was becoming. Finally, after long hours, Hitomi had left behind the residential suburban areas of her home and straight into the heartland of Aimsa, where so many of her memories rested within. On and on she continued to travel, gazing unconcerned at the busying environment, walking on still to a place or desire she did not know.  
  
Then, minutes later, something began to burn at the back of Hitomi's mind.  
  
For the first time in her long journey, she forced herself to stop entirely, and no longer pushed to continue on.  
  
There was something here. She had reached it.  
  
Standing amongst the throng of people, Hitomi had to fight them off to keep standing still, instead of being washed away with the crowd. She found herself standing in front of Yuuksuke's Diner, where her, Sophie, Fuy, and Eric would often stop by during their lunch hour. The CGU office branch in the Star Gaze office building wasn't very far from here, and Hitomi knew that it wouldn't be long before her three companions would be arriving for the usual baloney sandwiches at the usual 11:20 time slot.  
  
Hitomi couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt for not being with them without reliable excuse, but she could make up her seven and a half hours another day. She'd work overtime or something; it really wasn't too much of her concern at the moment. Still, she felt uncomfortable with the thought of being spotted, so she quickly followed the flow of the crowds until she was about a block away standing outside a used jewellery shop.  
  
That feeling began to grow stronger.  
  
Hitomi continued to have that strange sense, the same one that had brought her to finally stop walking after long last, and she continued to try and focus despite the business of her surroundings.  
  
There was something about this area.  
  
Her instincts wouldn't have forced her to come all this way without good reason. She had to figure it out. She had gone too far and worked too hard on this riddle to let it just slip her by. Hitomi wanted it over with, she wanted ALL of this strangeness done and gone from her life. There were too many other things to worry about, and now because of this, she found herself more lost from reality than she had ever been before.  
  
There.  
  
Suddenly, Hitomi jolted her head upwards, coming face to face with shadowy buildings filtering the blue afternoon skies. Her eyes began to quickly search and scan them, pulling her hair back away from her face and standing closer to the jewellery shop to avoid the rush of traffic on the walkways.  
  
Hmm.  
  
Hitomi stopped a second, and focused her attention when instantly her senses alerted her. Her eyes paused and fixed their gaze on a medium sized white building off to her left, about only one or two city blocks down.  
  
The Ramada. Aisma Ramada Hotel.  
  
Hitomi was very familiar with the place; after all, she had been the one scanning through the brochure not too long ago. Many of her wedding guests were staying there, including her cousins Alexandra and Tim from Poland. To Hitomi's surprised realization, she figured that they would be flying in in only down to what, three weeks and two days? It didn't seem possible, but it was true. And her favorite cousin, San, should be arriving the next weekend where they had been planning to have a large pre-wedding family get together on Hitomi's side. With all of everything that had been happening, Hitomi had forgotten all about it. It just didn't seem right for her to be so irresponsible, but she couldn't help it. The subject of her nearing wedding had completely slipped her mind.  
  
But Hitomi's concentrated thoughts didn't last for very long, as once again, her other intuition interrupted leaving Hitomi slightly annoyed. There always seemed to be something else to worry about, and with her past continuing to catch up with her, where did that leave her future? Just what was she doing anyway?  
  
Still, despite the pestering thoughts of Hitomi's earthly side, she continued to wait until she could cross Fifth Avenue, waiting impatiently as some red Civic flew past her at way over-the-limit speeds, then made her way down the packed street sides. It wouldn't be long now until she would answer all of her questions. Wherever her feet were taking her, wherever fate was guiding her, lay just at her fingertips.  
  


* * *  
  


"Would that be all Scott?"  
  
"Yep, sure, it's good for me Diane. Thanks eh?"  
  
Scott Darwood held up his large double sugar coffee thankfully, giving an appreciative nod in Diane's direction as she returned the smile then continued to pick out some fresh doughnuts for the next customer in line. The little cream-filled ones with the Aimsa Same, or Shark logo, were disappearing fast after the Sharks' feat over the Tigers just the other day. He still had the ninth inning emblazoned in his mind. That had been one _fantastic_ game!  
  
Scott arranged his faded jean vest against the happy red flannel of his shirt while carefully balancing the hot beverage, wishing that he had only brought along his coat instead of leaving it on the driver's seat. He had parked the large trailer truck quite a ways away and now he would have to endure the strangely chilling spring temperatures for a few extra minutes.  
  
But it didn't seem to matter too much really; he noticed that the weather was quite manageable as he stepped on outside of the Drink & Dunk doughnut shop, and out into the April weather. It was actually quite suitable for him since he did have that sweltering hot drink to carry along.  
  
Edging around the mills of people, and carefully sipping the coffee on his way, it wasn't long before he spotted the large trailer behind the Ay-Ay gas station, where the station owner Bill, had allowed him to keep it each day while he went out for lunch on the deal that he would fill up his constantly emptying tank at Ay-Ay's each time he parked. It was a well worth it compromise, and it was comforting to see the large "Exco" logo on the side of his truck always there to greet him from so far away. He'd have to hurry up; the company sure was getting on him about shipping schedule accuracies. He still had about another six-hour drive to go to reach Yokohama, and he wasn't counting breaks within that either. At the rate he was going, he doubted he'd have many more "breaks" anyway.  
  
Passing by the small station cubicle, Scott Darwood gave a wave to good ole Bill Ayazawa, who simply nodded, pointing at Scott's gas tank smiling proudly. Yup, Bill had given him another free gallon for who knows what reason, Scott figured he just was some kind old guy with time on his hands and friendships to make.  
  
"Aah," boarding the driver's seat comfortably, and resting his drink in the cup holder, he adjusted his rearview mirror, fixed up his mat of brown hair hidden underneath the faded red cap, gave a quick glance at the region map then started up good old Exco, as he comfortably nicknamed the truck he almost always drove. The roar of the beast came along loudly, and smiling contented on how well the day had started, he quickly began to pull out to carefully blend into the traffic of the downtown Aimsa streets.  
  
Thankfully, although it was still packed, it was much more clearer than usual allowing Scott to maintain a quicker speed. Ha, maybe he wouldn't face any troubles with schedule accuracies today! It looked just so promising for him to make it on time.  
  
Then suddenly, as the innocent driver struggled to make a turn on Fifth, he was rudely cut off by a blaring red Civic tearing past him, swerving on down the streets.  
  
** "HEY!! Learn how to drive asshole!!!!"  
  
** Panicked and very anguished, Scott didn't even have much more time to show the back of the red car his favorite finger, because it seemed he was quickly losing control of Exco. The trailer behind him didn't realize the need to stop so quickly and pressed its weight against him until the whole truck began to edge ever dangerously closer to oncoming traffic.  
  
It looked as if he'd have to speed this one; there was no other choice.  
  
Feeling his heart rate liven, Scott quickly eyed the oncoming traffic on Sherman, realizing he had only a few seconds to do this, and he _had_ to do it right.  
  
"Come on Scott, GO!"  
  
Pushing madly on the acceleration pedal and adjusting the gears, he felt the instant thrust of the truck moving quickly forwards, hurrying endlessly to beat the rush of cars. He pulled at the string above his head and let the horn give it's loud blare against all the other angry horns against him, signaling that he had no other option than this.  
  
Quickly, he spun the wheel around like mad, feeling the large monstrous vehicle hurriedly taking it's new course as it spun entirely left, only the back of it still remaining dangerously on the wrong path.  
  
The turn began to grow narrower and he felt the driver's wheel reach its maximum and start to fight with him to spin the other way, and in an almost paranoid sense, Scott worried that the sixteen-wheeler would begin to tip over, but he tried to silence his panicking thoughts. It would take much more than a narrow turn to get the truck on an angle. He was just losing it.  
  
Finally, barely scathing the sidewalk to many pedestrians' protest, Exco found itself on it's new course on Fifth merely seconds before the raging cars on the opposite lane came near close to hitting him horning loudly like there was no tomorrow. And to think, he was receiving the ugly end of the blame for just trying to keep from killing someone!  
  
But, unfortunately, it wasn't over yet.  
  
The narrow turn was just about complete when the tilt of it started to disturb many objects in his little driver's area. Magazines began to slide towards him, including other things placed on the dashboard; his keys, schedules, pens etc. began to topple over and lose themselves in the unknown areas of the truck floor. Then suddenly, one of the front tires quickly bumped over a wooden box that had been in the way though entirely unavoidable, and even more things than before came tumbling down towards him, including one very hot large cup of double sugar coffee.  
  
"AY!!! FUCK!!"  
  
Scott unfortunately let out a yelp of pain and obscurities as the scorching liquid came pouring down and drenching his jean legs, burning his lap straight through and sending sparks from his once wonderful CB radio. Jeans weren't very much help though, and the coffee steamed through him like boiling water, and he felt his eyes shut with pain, feeling it so immensely that it felt as if his skin were being torn off and his flesh sliced to shreds. In an agonizing reaction, Scott's right foot came down and came down hard on the accelerator pedal trying to relieve himself of any ounce of hurt that he couldn't escape.  
  
The truck came back to life with a roaring thrust, sifting on down the thankfully empty street, the nearest traffic still being about a block away. It took Scott about three seconds of unendurable pain before he realized his risky mistake. Despite his stinging burns, he tried to find a way to slow the beast down. and then. he heard it.  
  
_ "Hey watch out!"  
  
_ There was a cry from somewhere, somewhere close around him.  
  
Still wincing in pain and raspy with shear dread, Scott Darwood darted his eyes around worriedly, forcing his weight against the brakes.  
  
** But he was too late.  
  
** Scott was too late to notice the coated figure suddenly appear out of nowhere, cut threateningly across the street.  
  
He was too late to hear the loud shrieks of warning and the panicked blares of horns around him.  
  
He was too late to change anything that was going to happen.  
  
But he was early enough for one thing. He was early enough to know what was going to happen.  
  
Some one, some woman, had cut straight across a truck out of control and a driver in agony. Even as he swerved madly, ignoring his pain to the best of his ability, Scott Darwood knew it was as futile as could be.  
  
Scott was going to hit her.  
  
_** The truck was going to hit this woman.  
  
**_

* * *  
  


It was gone.  
  
Van scrimmaged all throughout the bed sheets, and tossed his suitcase aside as the contents came flying downwards to the ground.  
  
But it was obvious now.  
  
It was gone. The uniform had vanished as quickly as it had appeared.  
  
Groaning in disbelief, Van quickly brought up his hands to his face and smeared them down, feeling so totally confused.  
  
Where in the hell could it be?  
  
First of fall, it had only been a few seconds, or maybe even minutes now since he had just "awaken". It had felt as if Van had just escaped from a bad dream, a horrible nightmare, finding himself tossed within his once- arranged bed sheets and sprawling around in a cold sweat. For a few seconds after, Van had been entirely convinced that it had been nothing more than a bad dream. He had felt for certain that somehow, someway, he had fallen asleep without knowing and everything just sort of "happened" from there. That is, he believed it, until now. Until now when where that uniform had so surely once lay was nothing but a blank space.  
  
_ But then again,_ Van wondered as he ran his hand through his raggedy black hair and picked out one of his pairs of jeans from the clutter on the floor. _What if the uniform had been part of the dream too?  
  
_ That thought seemed to be even more unbelievable than the thought of the uniform simply just vanishing into thin air. His reasons for thinking that was partly because Van knew that when he knew something to 110% off the bat, that meant he was absolutely positively certain of it. Van was certain of it, the uniform had been there just before the nightmare, or "thing", or whatever had occurred. He had felt it for himself, he had felt it's rough textured fabric and even remembered putting the whole thing together. But then again, Van also remembered the chilling sensation he had received when he had brushed his fingers over that _girl's_ hand. He could still remember the rivets that had spiked through him when that girl, that Hitomi, had stared at him as if she had eerily seen him. If he could remember all of those things, then, couldn't they all have been real?  
  
Feeling the intensifying feelings of the doubts and questions returning to him, Van couldn't help but wonder what he was to do next as he zipped on his jeans underneath the bathrobe, only partly aware of what he was doing and the total fashion understatement he was making. Nonetheless, there lay all of his stuff, sprawled on the ground in a careless fashion after his flurry of post-vision panic to search for that blasted uniform. But it wasn't here, and he didn't even want to try to figure out how to find it. Frankly, there wasn't very much that Van _could_ figure out. His mind was too lost. His mind was caught adrift on a thousand thoughts blurring a second, worrying, analyzing, thinking.  
  
Just what did any of this mean? These sensual nightmares, these disappearing clothing items, that wonderful girl.could it all mean. but dearest, _why now?_ Why on earth now? Van didn't need this now! He didn't need these thoughts bothering him!! Just look at him, he was such a mess. He had things to do today, stuff to plan, people to call, yet he couldn't even leave his bedroom within falling headfirst into a well of problems! But why couldn't he just let it go? Why couldn't he just ignore it all and leave it behind him? Maybe because that's what he's been doing already for so long? Maybe, but still; what was Van to do, just what on earth _should_ he do now? His days here were quite strictly numbered.  
  
Sighing in the confused state he was apparently in, Van picked up the scattered items off the floor and threw them onto his bed. Never mind about those, he'd have to worry about them later. At this rate, he couldn't even concentrate enough to fold clothing.  
  
He dragged his lanky and fatigued body to the bedroom doorway, and sort of rested himself against the frame of it, just loosely folding his arms in that way he always did and directed his eyes upwards.  
  
Van couldn't seem to clear his mind.  
  
Sighing, he could tell, that no matter how hard it was he tried, he still couldn't draw his mind away. It was thinking, it was analyzing and now it was beginning to worry. Van couldn't accept things without reason. And this was one of those things. Just what was the reason? Where was the logic behind it all? What was the point of reincarnating those feelings that he had hidden so well earlier on? There didn't seem to be much sense in him having to see it all again, feel it all again. Van just couldn't understand. What did he have to understand?  
  
Then, just then. Van got that _feeling_; it hit him with such impact like a brick through a window.  
  
The warmth seemed to crawl up his spine. and the familiarity of it all instantly answered one of his questions: What he had just experience minutes before had not been a "dream". All of it, the scenes, the clothes, were _real_. He could feel the heat begin to burn through the doorway wood confirming that fact, and suddenly Van's stomach began to grow queasy.  
  
Now, not only could he feel it, but also he could _hear_ it.  
  
In seconds, Van heard the familiar screech of tires whisk by his open bedroom window. The awful sound of it ringing in his ears as it once had not long ago began to thriven his heart rate until he could already feel sweat begin to build upon his palms.  
  
Not being able to take it much longer, Van finally quickly edged over to duck his head outside in the cool air high up above Fifth Ave. below. The sounds of the city were there normal rate of loudly and lively as it usually was each day. But that sickening feeling wouldn't leave Van. There was still that difference, that imbalance in his knowingness that he needed to understand.  
  
_ Something was very wrong.  
  
_ Then suddenly Van focused his glare, wind carrying his black bangs around crazily, and the sunlight warming his tanned skin, he finally spotted the approaching menace of a red vehicle scoring towards him with the sound of it roaring louder and louder as it approached.  
  
Van's claret eyes narrowed considerably, studying the car as it noisily came and left. Vehicles around it honked angrily in their displeasure as it passed around the next corner and disappeared from his sight.  
  
_ But there was still something very wrong.  
  
_ Something was not right and whatever it was, it would have to happen soon. Van just knew it. Something terrible would be happening very, very SOON. The horrible premonition seemed to creep up his skin, wrap through his mind, and sink through his very well being. Van had to do something, and he had to do something **now.**  
  
Without much thought and more worry to his actions, Van quickly ducked his head back into the hotel room and scurried himself through the bedroom door and to the hotel living room where Van instantly began to wrestle with the stubborn balcony doors. Finally, after thrusting himself madly against the screen door (which neither him nor Merle ever successfully managed to unlock without damaging it) Van found himself standing in the small surface of the balcony, fresh on the outside pavement.  
  
From here, Van could still make out the roar of the car from before fading quickly, and the angry murmurs of crowds down below. Everything looked as if it were somehow returning to normal, but still Van knew that was far from the case. Van knew in any second now something was bound to happen which he couldn't-  
  
Then suddenly, **Van spotted her.**  
  
His thoughts blanking out entirely, Van's whole self seemed to stiffen as he watched the tiny little figure quickly waltzing around seven floors below him. The coated figure with flowing, short hair of birch brown amber, was quickly edging around all of the peoples that filed through the sidewalks. That figure got around surprisingly quickly in the skirt and heels, and seemed to be in a hurry. **Hitomi seemed to be in a hurry.**  
  
Van's throat caught itself in disbelief, to a point where he felt like choking. He could still sense that awful sensation of misfortune weighing strongly against him, and the thought of seeing Hitomi at a time like this was not very comforting at all. Despite all that had happened concerning his "vision", and understanding his emotions, still Van couldn't really say he was very happy to see her at the moment. Right now the world seemed to be raveled in negative vibes, which could only mean one thing:  
  
** Hitomi Kanzaki was in danger.  
  
** And that automatically meant Van, being Van, would have to risk everything in order to keep her safe. Van's desire, Van's burn, Van's mission had finally returned to him after all.  
  
It wasn't long after before the stumbling Mack tractor-trailer appeared out of nowhere faltering clumsily down the corner, wavering dangerously then suddenly picking up a vast increase in speed. Its large and unstoppable image plowed away any hopes for a peaceful ending, and easily signified what Van needed to hear, needed to know, without even fully understanding.  
  
**_ It was now.  
  
_** Everything that was everything was now. Van didn't understand it, he didn't get, and he didn't even want to try. The more seconds he wasted even thinking, the less time he would have to perform this action and to do it right. There were no second chances. There were no gambles on life. Once he failed, Van would fail for good. It was just one of those challenges that he had begun to miss.  
  
**_ It was now.  
  
_** Almost smiling in that competitive sense, Van felt his hands quickly remove his bathrobe, dropping it by his side on the balcony floor leaving him in nothing but the underwear and jeans he had thankfully put on. Instantly, he moved forwards until his bare abdomen reached the cool rail, and he gripped the railing tightly in preparation. Even until now, even when he was much older, Van still had to bear himself with what would happen next. In all honesty, no matter how critical the situation, Van had a feeling he would always never be prepared for this part of anything.  
  
Shutting his eyes quickly, knowing there wasn't much time to agonize, he let out an impulse, a signal, and in a second, _they_ reacted.  
  
A flurry of white sparkling objects like snow crystals, feathers, came glistening downwards all around him as in seconds his magical wings sheared through the surface of his back, sheared through the very surface of his skin. Automatically he felt the clasp of his enormously beautiful wings attach themselves to the muscles in his shoulders and strengthen the flesh near his spine, then unfurl themselves so carefully as their wingspan grew and grew, until Van stood in the center of just about four metres of white purity which even had to fold outwards in order to escape the limits of the balcony space. Even now Van couldn't quite grasp the fact that as he had grown, the invisible yet wondrous limbs of his body continued to grow within him.  
  
But Van did know one thing, despite the pain he had to still grow accustomed to.  
  
_ It had felt good.  
  
_ No matter how much he would never get used to doing just that, to relate back to the actions of his deceased ancestors, Van would still enjoy the feeling of these massive wings of power that gave him that sense of highness, a true feeling of royalty and heroism. With these wings, Van could always seem to defy the limits of any ordinary man that he would ever encounter.  
  
With these wings, Van could always somehow find a way to accomplish what he could never do otherwise.  
  
With these wings, Van would always be capable of rescuing those who needed it. With these wings, Van would rescue Hitomi one last time.  
  
Feeling his new sets of nerves control the white lengths of satiny feathers; Van quickly crawled himself upwards until he was merely balancing on the thin rails with his bare feet. Narrowing his eyes, Van knew there was no more time to kid around. He had to focus.  
  
**_ It had to be now.  
  
_** The Mack truck was not slowing down, instead it almost looked as if it was picking up speed. The character below him was still running. She was getting so close now. She was getting too close now.  
  
**_ It was time. It had to be now.  
  
_** With that last thought, Van's heart thumped loudly once more as he stretched outwards, wings unfurled, and dived off the balcony rail.  
  


* * *  
  
  
  


She was close.  
  
She could feel it; she was very close now.  
  
Hitomi couldn't quite catch her breath. The Ramada stood now directly above her and everything in her mind just seemed to click. She knew where she was going, she knew what she would find, and she knew her desire to find it.  
  
She was close enough to taste it.  
  
Still running through the packed street sides and weaseling around pedestrians everywhere, the only sound running through Hitomi's head was the loud clickety-clack of her heels smartly smacking against the cement floor. On and on those sounds went, almost rhythmic even, signaling each beat when she came just a second closer to her final destination.  
  
She was close now.  
  
Panting, she reached the street curb, and gazed over quickly to the hotel entrance, where many people were still bustling around.  
  
** She was here. She was here at last!  
  
** Heart racing, thoughts racing, feet racing, Hitomi Kanzaki quickly found herself spluttering onto the road, dashing quickly and thoughtlessly. She seemed to just run across the street, as if she were blind, as if she were deaf.  
  
It sure did seem that way, for Hitomi never noticed until she was mere seconds too late.  
  
Hitomi, finally feeling her vanished sense of reality return to her, suddenly could now hear the massive blares of an angry horn ahead of her, the piercing screech of tires, the jolts of weight burning through the road's pavement and the dark shadows being cast from it all.  
  
It all happened too quickly, but to Hitomi, it was nothing but pure slow motion.  
  
_ It was coming.  
  
_ The truck, the massive forest green truck was headed straight at her.  
  
It swerved slightly off to the left trying to avoid her, as Hitomi merely watched helpless and too much in shock and even too late to budge an inch.  
  
But a swerve would not help very much, if only make it worse. It looked as if either the front of it would crush her on impact head-on, or either she would be dragged and mercilessly decapitated underneath if the side of it would hit first.  
  
Wow, Hitomi didn't even know she would be spending the last seconds of her life thinking about possible death scenarios. In all honesty, she was thinking such stupid things because she didn't think she would die. It was just a truck, just speeding ahead of her. Even until now, the reality of impact still hadn't occurred in Hitomi's rather clouded mind.  
  
Until half a second later, it did.  
  
** Hitomi was going to die.  
  
Hitomi was going to die.  
  
Hitomi was going to die.  
  
** Instantly, in a wave of disbelief and pure fright, Hitomi fell to her knees and passed out.  
  
  
  


** PART THREE - Arms of the Angel - **

_ In the arms of an angel_

fly away from here

from this dark cold hotel room

and the endlessness that you fear

you are pulled from the wreckage

of your silent reverie

you're in the arms of the angel

may you find some comfort here

you're in the arms of the angel

may you find some comfort here

The swift, cunning figure raced down the building side in quicker speeds than he himself could have ever imagined. Maybe it was gravity; then again, maybe it was just the urgency of the moment. 

The large, bumbling truck with the imprinted "Exco" on the side was fast approaching, and seemingly racing the man to the figure below, the collapsed woman lying on her knees helpless in the middle of the street. It seemed as if the world was brought to a pause at that very instant. 

The wind rushed up against his face, blew him back upwards, breaking through his newfound wings, although the courageous warrior valiantly fought it off searing through the air like a bullet freshly fired. He knew where he was going, and he knew what he was to do, and he knew everything would happen long before that vehicle could ever cause any damage. There was no stopping him now, he just couldn't be stopped. 

Eyes unclosed despite the wind, he noticed that he was drawing ever closer. Now, he was only a couple of dozen of feet off the ground and funneling downwards quicker than the eye could see. He'd have to watch what he was doing. He couldn't afford a mistake right now. There was no room for errors; even a minor fault could cost him his life, not to mention the lives of many others. 

The wings came unfurled sideways, drawing themselves down quickly, trying to catch the wind in an umbrella-like manner in order to slow the racing figure down. He felt the pain trigger as many of his lengthy feathers snapped backwards at the force, continuing to ignore the hurt as he tried to slow himself, knowing that if he wasn't careful, the ground would rush up at him and everything would be finished. 

The truck continued on, continued to slip closer, continued to speed against this figure's will. Sixteen wheels continued to race his way, burning and loudly, threatening every ounce of courage he had within him. 

But he was close now. He was fast approaching as well. His glide became more controlled and his arms began to outstretch, his wings catching a manageable grip on the wind. He could do this. He was so very close. There couldn't be any errors now, no, he could not allow any at all. He was treading on a line so thin as one slip would cause everything to break in uselessness. 

The truck's horn was rather deafening, it sheared quickly through both lanes, apparently out of control for who knows what reason. The smell of it, the heat of it, the sight of it continued to immensely intensify as it made its presence known. It would only be a matter of seconds now, nothing but immeasurable seconds. 

What happened next occurred in only a fraction of those seconds, or possibly even less: 

Ducking his head and bracing himself, the winged figure came gliding downwards, using skillful flying techniques that no other possessed in order to bring himself as close to the ground as possible without brutally crashing into it. His face was soaring merely inches away from the rough surface of cement and tar, almost tasting the burned rubber tickle against his lips. 

The shrieks of pure disbelief and awe surrounded him. Crowds by the dozens, or maybe by the hundreds, watched in stationary shock from office windows, car seats, or hotel sidewalks. The world didn't seem to even breathe, too enraptured in the uniqueness of the moment. Countless faces had their directions fixated amongst the solo figure emblazoned in a glistening palette of white; but this mighty character had no time to let such outside things register in his mind. There were much more important factors to deal with, with too little time to handle them all. 

Now. It was now! 

Holding his breath, focusing his attention, he quickly outstretched his arms fully, feeling the pinching pain of the road's surface scratch against him. His wings lay horizontally in order to keep the few centimeters of altitude, his eyes still unblinking yet miraculously not watered over just yet. 

Now. There would be no faults. There could be no failures. 

The truck was edging ever closer. 

Twelve feet away. 

Eight feet away. 

Four feet away. 

But the man in incredible flight equally matched its speed. Even the quickest eye could never place a confident enough bet on either's arrival. The intensity of it all was beyond the comprehension of many. 

Then suddenly… time ran out. 

Her slim, limp body instantly lifted off the ground as the figure came towards it, rushing with arms wide open. Scratching the back of his hands against the cement until they bled, he somehow managed a secure grip around her body and under her legs as instinctively he held her close as in order to not let go. 

This was the most critical part of it all. 

In seconds, his whole body felt the draining impact of the new dead weight born upon him, and also a struggle he had not counted on. This figure had quite adequately underestimated the powers of gravity, foolishly forgetting that things went down with much greater ease then they went up, especially with double the weight. 

His throat tightened, and he held the dear woman close, and plowed angrily with his wings. Fright seemed to overthrow his whole image, including the fact that half of his wings were now tinting a deep blood-like red from the pain of feathers constantly snapping off, since they were never used often. 

How it hurt him so, the physical pain, the mental pain, the emotional pain. 

It couldn't be; it was too close. 

The truck was adjacent to them now. 

One foot away. 

His heart began to pound, his muscles contracting and aching all over, his wings exhausted yet rifting through the winds' pressure. 

He couldn't believe this. 

No, he had planned it so well!! 

No!! It couldn't be!! 

Feeling the fear spike through him, the character quickly shut his eyes, braced himself, and gave it everything he had. Every single ounce of effort and energy was flushed into his wings, making them pound one single time, making them beat against the air with an effective cyclonic thrust. 

If he couldn't save himself, then God knew he would still try to save her. 

The young man felt the instant propel of his body moving upwards, felt the nearness of the monstrous machine right by him, felt his arms lift the girl's sleeping figure above his head safe up at a distance as he pushed himself up higher. 

The screech of tires and squeal of brakes filled the once still air. 

Then suddenly, the brave warrior felt it. 

He felt the pain. 

In under seconds, the incredible and unexplainable pain of pure metal from the truck's protruding exhaust pipe tore deeply through the flesh of his left leg. Yes, he had managed to climb just enough altitude to keep them safe, but not enough to be so certain just yet. 

Instantly, his eyes squeezed tightly from the throbbing, and his grip on the girl loosened as the truck sped by just a foot below them. Feeling his wings drain of energy and his mind blocked out with aching impulses, the character came faltering downwards, instantly crashing his legs onto the surface of the trailer. As the truck whisked by, the red trickle of blood followed him until the surface of the trailer disappeared completely, and he was left with nothing but open air. 

Now, though blinded with pain and breaths of short, the unfortunate man had to struggle intensely to keep him and this woman from crashing once again into the ground. His wings fluttered helplessly around him, keeping him levitated but obviously much too weak to handle the challenges. His fleshly wound was searing painfully now from being so exposed to the crisp air, and not to mention his wings were at a pitiful state. No longer did they glow with white beauty, but instead the few feathers left had to fight to remain on the frail skeleton of the limbs. 

Wincing, he finally found himself pulling upwards after a few seconds of pure agony, finally he felt the power enliven in his wings once more despite the fact that he had no idea where any of the energy was coming from. 

Breathing slowly from the pain, the man grimaced and tried to put it aside. Even though everything seemed to hurt to such an incredible level, still, no matter about the soreness he felt and would feel, he knew something even more incredible. 

The young man felt himself encircle lightly as the breeze picked him up two stories higher, feeling the pain still there, obviously unavoidable, but less beckoning than it had been before. By ignoring that pinch of suffering, he could finally focus on just what all that pain had been worth. 

Feeling his head tilt downwards as they passed the fifth floor of the Ramada, his eyes fell upon the girl which he noticed was strangely holding onto him in return. It was strange… in it's own way because her eyes were not open at all. They were shut, and hidden behind the mahogany bangs fluttering from the wind. He couldn't even tell she was awake, but he could still feel it. He could feel the small and meaningful press of hands holding him, and almost in a thankful way, the caress of her leaning inwards and keeping herself close. 

He studied her a little longer as his balcony approached, now not even thinking of the cut that usually would have been crying out with distress. Instead he watched the soulful and content expression of gratitude lined upon this young woman, and with that he tucked her in closer, and smiled. Van could do nothing but smile. 

**PART FOUR - Hello & Goodbye -**

It was cold here. 

The chilliness had already caused her last drying tear to cake against her face. 

Hitomi shuddered, and brought the comforters up higher, still crowding herself in that balled immobile position in which she had remained in since she had awakened. Since then, her soft sniffling had ceased, and the blur over her eyes had cleared at long last. Now Hitomi just lay in this strange bed in this strange room, eyes shut in a realm of self-pity; tucked underneath the thick blankets as if to escape from reality, the reality she could not understand. And so she lay, alone from her tears and alone with her thoughts. 

What was she going to do? 

It was the same question that had plagued her since the second her blaring mind had come to full operation; and even now she had not found a solution to her countless array of problems. For instance, why on earth was she now waking up in a strange hotel room of the Ramada? She didn't know why or how she had gotten here, but at least she had figured out she was in the Ramada Hotel simply by judging from the noisy downtown Aimsa environment she could hear through the open bedroom window, the source of the chilly breeze. 

Asides from that, Hitomi began to wonder: who had brought her here? It was an obvious curiosity to have in her conditions, and even lying on the bed she could easily spot the clutter of men's clothing strewn upon the floor escaping somehow from an empty suitcase sitting off by the foot of the bed. In the reclusive dimness, she knew she was here with some man somewhere off in the apartment, but Hitomi was too afraid to face what she thought. There were plenty of scenarios that came to mind (some terrifying yet some rather intriguing) but Hitomi did her utmost best to ignore them all. 

A part of her was too fearful. She was too afraid to know just who had brought her here. Why was she afraid? Simply because Hitomi knew when she figured out who had rescued her from her stupid mistake, Hitomi would instantly come to remember her long journey here in the first place, her disturbing visions early this morning, and everything else that had happened to result in that "someone" to come to her mind. She didn't know why exactly that all of a sudden, her fear was keeping her from the truth, but maybe it was because Hitomi hadn't decided on just how prepared she was to know. Hitomi didn't feel she was prepared to face it at all, to face it all to an undeniable certainty. Hitomi was afraid of all that she would come to remember, all the thoughts restored within her, all the feelings replenished. That was why she was so afraid. She couldn't bear the thought of feeling that indescribable feeling because she knew if she did, there was a strong chance that she could never let go of that powerful emotion all over again. 

The winged image began to fill her mind once more. 

Obviously her "attempts" on forgetting were simply an invisible introduction to remembering. It was futile. How much longer could Hitomi Kanzaki live a lie anyway? There was only so much time before Hitomi would be reborn in the truth. She had been ready before; she had been ready and willing to face the facts not long ago. Backing out now would simply be cowardly. 

With that thought in mind and her senses awakening, Hitomi pulled down the warming sheets and slowly sat herself up allowing the draftiness to take her, running a faint hand through her cluster of bed-hair. In the lonely darkness she stared down plainly at her favorite knee-length skirt, and noticed the two runs in her panty hose that were not there earlier on. Obviously, it was just one of the marks to remind her of that troubling life-and-death scenario she was trying to forget altogether. 

Sighing, she felt her heart weaken with burden as she stared lowly out through the window beneath the flustering drapes. She must have been asleep longer than she had expected, for the familiar night glow had already stolen the scene of the city, and left her in this room, in this hotel of darkness. 

Finally, finding some reappearing energy to stand herself, Hitomi stretched upwards and stared down at the bed before her. Her rest had been so undisturbed, and although she was concerned about her whereabouts, she still felt reluctant to leave that state of peace. In those few moments of sleep, she had at least been free from the restlessness and puzzles of the world. It was that normal state of life she was beginning to miss. When did things start to become so confusing and complicated anyway? 

Oddly finding herself arranging the bed sheets, a smile couldn't help but trickle on her somehow. It had been a nice rest, a nice getaway from the rush of all that had happened. Whomever it had been who had rescued her, whether Hitomi was ready to face them or not, obviously cared enough for her to not only keep her safe, but comfortable as well. 

The winged image approached her mind a second time. 

With the bed made, Hitomi's eyes wandered themselves in the dimness, until they fell upon the bedroom door, slightly ajar. A flutter of apprehension and nervousness surged her at the awareness of it. 

Quietly and almost edgily, Hitomi in her stocking feet crept over to the bedroom door, the wooden floorboards underneath the carpeting hardly creaking despite her weight. With the dreary silence and darkness of the hotel room, she felt too repressed as even to utter a sound. 

Her fingers graced over the painted wood slowly, her eyes befalling nothing but darkness on the other side of the door. She breathed deeply. 

There was no more time to delay. 

If Hitomi wanted her life to return to anything near normal, it just had to be now. 

She was ready now. 

She knew well that there was no way out of this place without meeting the unavoidable. According to her knowledge, Hitomi had no real way home. She had no money, she had no car, she had no phone and not to mention it was a very long trip, and a cold and dark one if she were to walk. Even if she somehow managed to call anybody, Amano most likely, Hitomi knew in seconds she felt too much in shame to request anything. What was her excuse for all of this anyway? What was the reasonable and logical explanation she could give for someone like Amano Nekuchi to understand? She knew there were none. She knew she could not find a sensible way to justify her actions, and so now, even consulting her own fiancé seemed a strange and unlikely thing to do. She simply felt that even Amano could not understand her at this time. 

Breathing slowly at the heavy thought, Hitomi drew back the bedroom door, alarmed suddenly at the noisy creak erupting from the door's hinges. 

She held herself dormant in tension, but still, not a sound of response was emitted from within the hotel walls. It seemed an odd thought to think after all the thinking she had already done, but what if Hitomi didn't need to be prepared for anything after all? Just what if, no one was actually here? Could that be? 

Deciding not to fret about it until she knew for certain, Hitomi pushed herself past into the docile living room. It was dark and rather cold in here as well, the whole place looking as if deserted for not even a light was lit anywhere she could see with the exception of the light peeking in from the hotel hallways or the city glow through the balcony doors. 

She paused, feeling suddenly indicated by something. 

Brushing back a lock of mahogany from her eyes, her vision befell a single light amongst the blackness. 

The pink beams from her radiant original pendant danced lightly against the bare of her skin as it hung from her neck as always. At first she was taken aback by the glow, but soon her eyes became accustomed and again she began to remember the days when a glowing pendant would be entirely normal. When had she forgotten her childhood anyway? How did she not remember those dear times when she would sit alone in the closets every now and then, just staring at it? Her heirloom had constantly fascinated her, but she figured that the length of time she had been without the original had gained her less knowledge of the powers she had forgotten she possessed. 

Feeling her fingers grace upon its warmth, she remembered the reasons behind a lit pendant. It meant something much more than merely illuminating magic. There were _reasons_ behind it that signaled her to understand. Now with the pendant's safe return, it was once again guiding her as it usually always did before she had given it away. 

Feeling her eyes adjusting, she redirected them once again to her mysterious surroundings. Instantly the outlines and shades of numerous appliances and basic apartment surroundings filled her eyesight. 

But this was not what she wanted to see. 

The pendant had reacted to something, no better yet, _someone_. Hitomi was not alone. She knew it and she knew it well. How? Well, she didn't care how she knew. The bottom line was she was certain that her hero had not left her here all by herself. He was here. He was here and there had to be a good reason why she had not approached him yet, but there was no doubt that she would soon. 

Still gazing amongst her, Hitomi took a step forward only to feel her stocking toes grace over something, something maybe even moist. 

Recoiling at the revolting tingle, she stared downwards quickly, trying to see to the best of her ability as her jade eyes reflected against a dark stain-like thing dotting the carpet by her feet. 

Intrigued by curiosity, Hitomi decided to inspect the mystery. 

Lightly, she dabbed the strangeness with her index finger, a part of the moist substance glazing her skin. Bringing it up to the faint light of her necklace charm, Hitomi submitted a silent gasp at the sight of the redness coating her finger. 

Instantly, a sickening chill ran through her. 

It was blood. _Fresh blood._

Then as if on cue, Hitomi received a lingering sensation, a lingering knowing of the origin of the blood, of the holder of the wound. The thought seemed to bother her and interest at the same time, half afraid to know but only knowing she would have to know. 

Her eyes darted upwards, instantly accustomed to the darkness feeling the mood intensify, signaling her of the dire need of the situation. Something needed her. Hitomi could sense it crawling at the back of her mind. This strange blood was a sign of it all, it was a sign that- 

Then Hitomi's thoughts blanked out completely. 

No words filled her mind, no ideas formed. Instead, the stock-still Hitomi just held her breath and stared trying to comprehend it all; the blood on her finger, the darkness of the room, the figure lying helpless before her. 

She felt her breathing catch still in her throat, invoking an almost choking impression. 

He just lay there. Unmoving. 

For countless seconds, her eyes scanned his frail and thin body, searching the bare palette of wounds and scratches for any sign of hope. 

She couldn't blink, she couldn't breathe. 

But at least he was. He was breathing, she could tell but barely. His chest seemed to heave upwards and downwards at the slowest pace possible, each time threatening as if to breathe his very last. 

She couldn't even come to think; instead her eyes studied him with an overpowering empathy and compassion. Before her, lying sprawled against the gray of the sofa, was a young man exactly her age with eyes shut and head backed against the arm of the couch. His berry black bangs hid his expression of pure agony, but Hitomi didn't need to see it to know it. His pain was already obvious enough just by being in his presence, never mind paying heed to his countless scratches, deep wounds and… 

Hitomi felt a revolting churn of her stomach, as if lunging her heart through her esophagus as her eyes befell it. The sight of it, the sight of the wound surged her with a sickening reaction. Feeling her eyelashes beat against her skin as she tried to blink it all away, Hitomi knew the facts still lay there before her. 

His leg, it was so badly… ruined. Hitomi didn't know how to describe it, but the feeling of it impacted her intensely that she could barely find the courage to remain standing. She could almost smell it even, smell the stench of that deep gash, that deep cut searing to the bone on that young man's left leg, searing so deeply that it had tinted the towel around it to a frightening shade of red. 

Through those watering eyes, Hitomi felt herself draw closer to him. She felt herself willingly approach what she could not bear to see, but what she could not bear to turn away from no matter how hard her heart wrenched inside. 

She felt so upset, she felt so alone, she felt so responsible. 

Only inches away now, she felt her index finger wipe away the renewed tears lining her cheeks, then felt her fingers lower themselves as she could not take her eyes away. In seconds, she felt her hand take his, felt her small feeble fingers drape over his cold skin, felt her take him as she fought to keep herself from erupting in sadness. 

She bowed her head in shame, in realization, in responsibility. 

She watched slowly and painfully as the young warrior continued to live in nothing but this realm of misery. 

Face of guilt partly hidden within coarse bangs, she felt her lips move to a soft whisper: 

_"It's all my fault, I'm sorry. Van, I'm so very sorry."_

* * * 

"No, I'm sorry, I can't help you," Hitomi wearily gave the inquiring middle-aged woman another fatigued glare. She didn't care whom this woman was, she may have been the Queen Amidala herself (what with all that makeup on), but Hitomi could not give much more than an unenthusiastic shrug. 

Under the dim lighting of the hallway, it wasn't hard to notice the pestering lady flash the shorter, faired haired man by her side a skeptical glance. Then seconds later, she returned her demeaning stare to Hitomi, sapphire eyes piercing through her with not only doubt, but also impatience. 

"I'm pretty sure of what I saw young lady," her voice came out annoyingly shrill, in Hitomi's opinion. "And there are about ten or fifteen people downstairs in the lobby you can go talk to that would say the same thing." 

"That's very nice," Hitomi's reply was strangely dry and frozen cold. It almost seemed as if any trace of friendliness had vaporized completely. She was only left with this longing to escape from the two strangers to get to what she really wanted to do, and needed to do even. 

"I didn't say I didn't believe you, ma'am, I'm just saying that I never saw or heard anything peculiar. Now please…" 

The man off to the woman's left of which had stayed rather silent lately, shifted his weight and peeled his small, speck-like eyes to Hitomi, prying with the same look of suspicion as the woman shared. He was obviously raveled in a state of discomfort, not so knowing about how to go around this awkward situation. 

The woman stared at him, as if urging him to help out the ailing confrontation. 

"Well, what do you think Lec? Should we call the investigator up here or what? She's wasting our time." 

Hitomi felt her ears burn with anger and a new level of annoyance, flashing the hag of a woman with a viscous look and sealing her lips in a thin, unappealing gesture. Although having just awakened, the two bustling intruders had already keened Hitomi to a new sense of alertness. 

"Are you sure that you saw them come up here, Mrs. Hein?" The man clenched his hands in an apparently nervous manner, constantly keeping his eyes away from staring at the flare in Hitomi's. 

"Of course I'm sure," Kasher Hein granted the small superintendent a near-to-evil look, seeming more certain of herself that doubt didn't even come to fringe her thoughts. "Everyone is sure! My son saw it too if you'd like to ask him!" 

Hitomi watched the feud with a bored glance, still utterly irritated by their incompetence. She could feel the itching drag to flee away from these menacing people, to escape from their suspicion and get to more important concerns. After all, he lay just beyond their view, securely hidden because of the way Hitomi only held the hotel door ajar by only about five inches. Any wider and the wounded victim she had been so earnestly caring for would be exposed to prying eyes like theirs. 

"All right then," the slightly heavy man, Lecward Bargera, gave one last heave of a sigh and directed his attention back to the thwarting Hitomi, who fired at him invisible darts through her glaring green pupils. He furrowed his brows and cleared his throat respectively. 

"Well then, if you are certain, we must call upon the investigator… there doesn't seem to be much choice…" he flaunted Hitomi a knowing glance. 

Sensing on their intentions, Hitomi's curiosity instantly sparked. 

"What on earth do you mean? What investigator?" 

"Well then young lady, if you don't consider listening to Mr. Bargera and I, we will call upon the detective," Kasher Hein threw her chin back triumphantly, as if also tuning in to Hitomi's sudden weakness: higher authority. 

"You don't seem to understand the importance of this situation." 

"I told you I didn't see anything!" 

"That's not the point!" Kasher Hein, with slightly frayed pale blonde hair flurrying about in the abandoned 80's style, stomped her foot aggressively in the entrance of the doorway, expression challenging Hitomi's ever so daringly. 

"The point is something rather significant has occurred here, and if you won't allow us to investigate, then we'll get someone who will investigate whether you like it or not-" 

Then, Kasher's voice quite dimly trailed. 

Hitomi observed her, slightly amused from the satisfying aggravation invoked from her newest archenemy but also in wonder on why the old bag's verbal attacks had so quickly cut short. 

Kasher Hein brought her aged hands to her hips, loosely flinging back a ringlet of curls as if pretending she was young enough to exhibit her retired looks. She continued to lay her eyes upon the anxiously impatient Hitomi, scanning her from head to toe as if a light bulb had lit somewhere. 

Furrowing her brows with a sort of contemplative conclusion, she leaned downwards to Lec Bargera and hastily hushed something into his left ear. 

Hitomi gazed at their secrecy, feeling the annoyance burrow deeper within her until it was close to scathing the line of "hate". Hitomi didn't need this at this time, and it was obvious that her patience was close to worn out. 

Tapping her foot and squirming intolerantly, a fogged thought quickly jabbed into Hitomi's mind. 

A secret? 

What did that woman, that Hein, say to the small man? The superintendent of the Ramada…There wasn't much doubt; it had to do with Hitomi, but what about Hitomi? What kind of conniving stupid things could this woman be concocting? 

Then… Hitomi came across to a far-out but easily reasonable explanation. 

This woman, this Hein, continued to insist that she had seen "it", she had seen "them" return to this place. If that were so, if Kasher Hein had been one of the few selected witnesses to accurately describe what had happened maybe even hours before now, then wasn't there chance that… 

Hitomi swallowed dryly. 

_That must have been it_. Kasher Hein must have recognized her. She probably knew Hitomi had been the one _directly_ involved in the "incident" and thus knew that Hitomi was simply lying her way out of things. 

Kasher's eyes didn't seem to blink as they glazed with sudden knowledge. Lec Bargera, alongside her, seemed to nod supportively as he too examined Hitomi inquisitively. 

"Very well," his voice came out somewhat weak, hardly glinting with as much authority as his shrill, female companion. "That detective or whomever Kaaya called should probably take a look up here, I hope you're aware of this." 

He gave Hitomi a serious look. 

"You really should listen to us. We know this is the exact apartment we're looking for." 

Hitomi, feeling quickly judged, was just about to rush back with some sort of creative excuse when she felt the presence of Hein urging Lec to hurry on down the corridor back to the hotel elevators. 

"Don't waste your time," Kasher's voice portrayed no sympathy. "This arrogant girl has made a mistake, and we'll be the ones to prove it." 

Lec gave a doubtful glance in Kasher's direction, one last look at the confounded Hitomi, and headed on down the carpeted hall, pants swishing in that usual annoying manner. Kasher Hein wasn't slow to follow, but not before turning herself once more to face the not only perplexed, but now worried, Hitomi Kanzaki. 

"Before we go young rude miss, I'd hope you know that Lec here is in charge of the Ramada, and the second we go downstairs we _will_ be checking the register to find out just why you're here. Not only that, but I'll personally make sure the investigator gets a good look at you. Don't think I'm stupid lady, I know who you are." 

"And just who do you think I am?" Hitomi, although feeling her insides tearing like weak jell-o, managed to somehow retain her icy stare. 

The tip of Kasher's lip curled in an almost malevolence manner, as she turned to face Bargera, already impatiently waiting by the hotel elevator. 

"I guess we'll find out soon enough, now won't we?" 

And with that, the boastful woman turned the small of her back towards Hitomi and minutes later disappeared from the corridor avec Lec Bargera, at least for the time being. 

Gazing in an almost stunned manner, Hitomi's thoughts came hitting back at her too many at a time, until she was left shutting the door madly and leaning her drained weight against it. 

She laid her head back, eyes shutting. 

_What was she going to do???_

Hitomi had seen it in Kasher Hein's malice expression. That woman knew. Kasher Hein not only knew, but also saw for herself, what had happened just hours before. Even Hitomi barely remembered the clear details, having fogged it out to the best of her ability. But still, never did she guess that Van's, heroic act could leave them now hanging in a state of federal jeopardy. Only now did Hitomi realize that there weren't any possible or logical explanations she could come up with in ten minutes' time. What was she to say? To a detective even! In front of ten to fifteen witnesses??! Hitomi was done for. She could never deny it; the most she could accomplish to do was to play stupid and pretend as if had been totally unaware of what had happened, which is partially true since she had been in some sort of state of sub-consciousness. Even then, how much more of her fabled tale would they by? Hitomi was sure of it. They had seen the wings. All of those eyeballing spectators must have seen everything: Hitomi, the truck, the cars, the wings, the flying, and Van. 

Van… 

The name brought her head to lower once again, and reduced her breathing as her eyes befell the saddening image still lying almost motionless on the sofa. He didn't look as wrenching as before though, seeing as Hitomi had been spending her last few minutes cleaning encrusted blood off his wounds, and transforming the sofa to be as comfortable for him as possible. Even then, she couldn't have hidden her disappointment upon seeing that he had not awaken yet. Although she was gentle with him, she still somewhat hoped her movements would jostle him just enough to regain his ability to speak with her. Hitomi needed to speak with him. She didn't know what to do. She didn't even know if he was okay. 

As she peeled herself away from guarding the doorway, Hitomi slowly walked over closer to Van, thinking she may as well spend her last few minutes with him in solitude. Hitomi was confident that it wouldn't be long before he would be discovered, wound and all, and then things would merely go downhill from there. 

He was breathing softly now, looking to an almost contented state of sleepy peace. She smiled sitting alongside him and brushing a black bang away from flustering his closed eyelids… it was almost adorable really. If you put aside the graphic cuts and scars, the darkening bruises, and the permanent gashes, you were really left with not a warrior, but the man in the warrior. Almost like a young boy, a young boy of innocence. 

But soon, too soon, Hitomi's smile left her. 

She could not just _sit_ here and watch this, thinking happy thoughts that weren't really relevant in this situation. Hitomi longed to do nothing but stay here with him, just observing the way this mysterious yet impacting stranger graced her emotions inside to a point she didn't understand but grew fond of. Then again she also knew that not only her time, but also his time as well, were running deeply slim. She couldn't take the chance, and wouldn't take the chance on his life. Hitomi didn't care if that stupid Hein and her partners in crime came back after her; maybe it wasn't even such a bad thing. At least that would guarantee that Van would receive the medical assistance he needed, and Hitomi meant _needed_. She had been considering somehow finding a way to take him to a hospital, or somewhere, anywhere, to receive help. She was no medical expert, but she knew a deep wound like his could easily attain infection, not to mention he was also in risk for his large account of blood loss. For minutes now she had been earnestly panicking about Van's situation, thinking of solutions but each time running into a larger obstacle than the last. 

Then, as Hitomi's hand slowly took his weak fingers in her hold, a thought occurred in her mind. It seemed absurd at first, but she knew out of all her options, it was probably a reasonable one and maybe even held some sort of advantage. It should have occurred to her earlier, but now was now, and if Hitomi was quick enough, maybe she could pull it off. Maybe at last, Hitomi could find a real answer to the desperate crisis, which plagued her. A crisis she had not asked for and had not predicted, but now was so easily enveloped within. 

* * * 

His eyelashes fluttered beating rapidly against the surface of his cheeks. As dim light seemed to filter his view, the remnants of a migraine appeared to form itself again out of nowhere. 

Van lay perfectly still, not wishing to aggravate his aches and pains any more than he had to. As the drag of his previous sleepiness began to finally leave him, he couldn't help but wonder on just how long he had been awake, or better yet, how long he had been asleep. It was as if time had abandoned him altogether, for just lying here he had absolutely no clue on exactly "when" it could be. As far as he was concerned, seven months could have passed without his knowing. Time could only partly worry him at the moment though, for it seemed as if his ailments made it to the top of his list of priorities. 

Slowly, carefully, Van decided to raise himself, at least to the point where he could see past the ceiling. It was a slow and painful procedure but by squirming just enough Van managed to rest his back against the sofa arm finally sitting upright. Gosh, how that had hurt. How could it be that his muscles ached so much? It was like an unquenchable fire searing through his flesh, to the point that breathing became a hassle in itself. He didn't know how much more he could take. No matter how tough Van was, it didn't deny the fact that he was a mere mortal, thus pain so easily registered. 

Grimacing considerably under his slow breaths, Van allowed his vision to gaze upon his massacred leg, securely wrapped three times in what he recognized were hotel towels. Each towel however looked nothing as they originally were, now blotched deeply with red markings that made Van's stomach recoil rather sickly. It all instantly reminded him of the vast amount of blood that he couldn't control losing not long ago. In just seconds he could remember the dizzying sensations, his body growing weak and his thoughts becoming faint until he figured he must have just blacked out completely. It was honestly a frightening sensation, one too close to a deathly edge that he would do anything but relive it again. 

Settling still, Van swallowed deeply trying to grow accustomed to the acute spasms of pain, and focused on letting his mind clear. After avoiding the topic of his physical suffering, Van adequately noticed how cleanly his surroundings were, including himself. Where once stained scars and deep cuts lay, were now cleaned scabby skin and patches of bandages made up of a gauze cloth material and attached to his skin with medical tape. He dabbed at the appendage curiously, slightly intrigued having not seen the contents of a first aid kit before in his life. The pain reacted, as expected, but at least not to such a hurtful extent as previously before. 

The bloody stains around him on the carpets and cushioning seemed to have faded away as well, either having dried or were cleansed. Van really didn't know what to make of it, but it did make him feel a little reassured inside. It filled him with the knowledge that whatever was happening now, he was at least safe and being taken care of. He could tell that whomever was with him was here recently, for the open medical kit still lay partly used on the coffee table alongside. 

Then Van's thoughts abruptly silenced himself. 

There was sound. It didn't take too long before Van could sense it, but he was quick to react. There was sound here, that someone was here, in a room off to the left. 

As Van gently twisted himself to face the bedroom doorway, he became certain that he could hear footsteps from the inside, and strange, alien beeping sounds. 

Seconds later, Van familiarized with the beeps, remembering them from what the earthlings referred to as the "telephone". But Van knew only one other that was here with him before his mind had left him, but she couldn't have awaken already as well? Could she? Could she have been the one who had helped him so without his knowing? 

Van frowned, finding that rather ironic, seeing as he had been the one who had figured he should be taking care of her, not vice-versa. Hitomi had looked well when he had last seen her, absorbed in her sleep. Van figured she was exhausted, probably would be out for a couple of more hours. If that was her awake in there, it was either she had gotten up earlier than he had expected, or else he had been asleep longer than he knew of. Whatever it was, Van was not going to take it lying down. He knew then he'd have to investigate. 

"…. come on, please pick up…." 

At the sound of the enchantingly familiar voice, Van nearly jumped off the sofa, hardly paying heed to the rendering amounts of pain catching him at the action. He did everything with the expected awkward limp but also with an added sense of silence, for some reason not wanting her to know right away of his awakening. He couldn't help but feel slightly curious, and a little repressed at the idea of meeting Hitomi so suddenly. It just seemed awkward to face her like that, so unprepared on what he was to say or do. Frankly, he still didn't know and doubted he ever would, but nonetheless he wasn't going to just outright jump in there and say "Hey, how ya doin'?" - That just wasn't Van. He really didn't know what he was going to do just yet, either that, or Van was something that he would never admit on being. But the fact still lay there somewhere around the way: Van felt incredibly shy. 

"…Amano…" 

Van, inching and tiptoeing the short distance not only because of silence, but also in prevention of pain, listened at the sudden sound of disappointment clash against Hitomi's voice. He could hear her quite well now filtering from the opposite side of the bedroom door, speaking of the name he remembered quite easily. It seemed strange now for him to imagine Hitomi and Amano in real life. To Van, the two figment creatures were like objects of his memories, but instead he was now being presented with a present day situation. Once again, the thought made him feel funny inside, a sort of selfishness and anger resembling jealousy in an oddly harmonious condition. 

As his eyes peeked through the small space the door left open, he directly spotted her very near by, the back of the young woman facing him with a cord phone nestled on her right shoulder. Van's throat caught itself immediately, in surprise and sudden nervousness. 

Another sigh floated from Hitomi Kanzaki, as she looped an additional series of cord curls onto her index finger. On the opposite line a loud beep rung to Hitomi's worry and disappointment. 

"**Amano!**" Her voice seemed to be filled with a sort of inflicting panic overwhelmed with a kind of sadness and urgency. "Look, if you can here me, please pick up! I tried calling our cell line but I guess you're recharging yours. Amano, listen to me, I need your help. It's bad. It's an emergency, and I don't know who to turn to! YOU NEED TO HELP ME!! Amano please, pick up! Look, I'm in the Ramada downtown, I have a friend here who was in an accident and is going to bleed to death if I don't do something! I can't take him to the hospital, it's hard to explain but-" 

The suddenly Hitomi's wailing voice lost all tone. 

The line on the other end had beeped a second time, then hung up. 

"Shit!" Hitomi, angered incredibly and also inflicted by feelings of pure anxiety and a sort of fright, yanked the telephone straight out of it's jack and flung it madly against the hotel wall, watching as it came crashing to broken pieces scattered against the hotel carpet. It reminded her instantly of the radio that had undergone a similar attack earlier that morning. Why had she gone so crazy then? At least Hitomi had a good reason to be crazy now, a very good reason. She wasn't dreaming about Van, she wasn't having a vision of Van, Hitomi was WITH Van. She had pinched herself countless times now but each time was as useless as the last. It was no dream; there was nothing synthetic about it all. Hitomi knew it was all too real and if she didn't do something now she was putting the sake of her meaning to life in jeopardy. She had no clue on how that was so, but she figured it was so. 

Thus, that thought frightened and angered Hitomi even more. She began beating on things, deciding to destroy anything that wasn't a fabricated part of her imagination. It all seemed unfair to her, how was it that all the odds lay stacked against her favour? Why did she have to be so damn foolish? She shouldn't have come! She shouldn't have come and attracted all that negative attention to herself, and above all she shouldn't have done something as stupid as wandering in the middle of the road like that. What would she have done if it weren't for Van? _She would be dead._ Hitomi would be nothing but a giant clunk of human roadkill. She owed her life to him, as she knew she did countless times before. But now what? All because of her stupid mistake the very person whom had sacrificed everything to rescue her was now about to lose his own life in the process. Well, Hitomi didn't think Van was in that much of a critical condition physically, there was still a very good chance that with the right attention he would be just fine despite maybe an injured leg. But that wasn't what worried Hitomi. It was everything else that equally panicked her, the thought of earthly "reality" that could not be avoided. In her dreams, in her visions, even in her memories it was alright to think of "Gaea" as this sanctuary place she could run to. But now, now when the thought hit her like a bullet she understood the fine line "Gaea" treaded between being nothing more than a dreamworld and reality. That was just what it felt like. It felt as if somehow, someway, Hitomi's most vivid fantasies and dreams had crossed that boundary of reality, and stepped flat into the actuality of her life. Now, everything was blended together, present day emotions, past emotions and growing worries. Hitomi was left all alone to find the medium of two worlds she couldn't explain. 

Even lying slightly ruined on the floor, the phone continued beeping in that way to alert someone that it was off the hook. 

_"SHUT UP!"_ Hitomi easily angered at it interrupting her thoughts thrust a heavy suitcase in its direction, breathing furiously trying to conceal all of it, trying to calm herself down. But it was to no use; Amano couldn't even help her. He had been her very last hope of hopes. He could have came over quickly, used his medical knowledge to assist Van and with his devotion to Hitomi, he wouldn't tell a soul about what had occurred. Hitomi very much doubted that Amano Nekuchi would be the type to believe anything about Van's real identity, but that really didn't matter. The important part was that he would at least keep the information confidential, whether he acknowledged its authenticity or not. 

But no, there was no Amano, there were no friends, no people she could trust. The only ones left with Hitomi were those cruel spectators that were like bloodsuckers, only out to destroy what they didn't understand. They would take Van from her. They would steal him away from her grasp and would never set him free. What would she do then? How could she protect him? How could she keep those with such evil intention at bay? The truth was she couldn't. Things have been revealed to the world now, things that mere earthlings didn't know of and would easily probe into. People of the everyday could not just accept "dreamworlds" and "angels"; it was too much of a far-out concept. They would take him from her, and it would all be Hitomi's idiotic fault. 

Feeling her writhing passions of anger weaken, Hitomi was overwhelmed with a blow of self-pity. With her body going limp, she sulked to the floor and fell into a well of tears. Hitomi was nothing but a sorrowful figure, only wishing to cry all of her miseries away. 

That invoking choke clasped on his throat tightened and swelled, to a suffocating point. Van had reacted surprisingly to each of Hitomi's aggravated emotional outbursts, but then again to see the fine, young woman reduce herself to a sobbing form caught him off guard as it often did. Van realized that just like previously in his startling visions, Hitomi was raveled once more in that strange bout of sadness. She was obviously so very upset, angry but also sad. Van also knew quickly what she had been trying to do. Hitomi had been trying so earnestly to find help for him. She had called that man; her fiancé Amano, to come to aid her but apparently that cry for help had gone unheard. And now, all of that left her so saddened, so worried about him. It didn't make much sense at first, but then Van understood. Hitomi was worried for him. 

Slowly, Van gently opened the door, hearing the creak escape loudly from the door's hinges, alerting the poor, sobbing figure sitting helpless on the bedroom floor. 

Hitomi raised her face away from her moist palms, drying her cheeks slowly on her blouse sleeve and fighting hard to control the wheezes seizing her. Supporting herself in a half-stand position, Hitomi turned her direction towards the comforting silhouette illuminating from the bedroom doorway. She allowed her shaky hand to grasp the warmth of his... and observed in surprise as the young and handsome man drew Hitomi to her feet with a comforting smile written upon him. Without words, without need of words, the person whom Hitomi now worried so much for and cared so dearly for returned that affection, holding her still within his embrace. And thus, in the humming silence of the empty hotel room, Hitomi fell into that embrace as her tears began to dry once more. 

*~*~* 

"Can you describe the man that was with this young woman in detail?" 

"It's like I told you a dozen times," Kasher's voice showed no patience, much the less the stressed expression upon her face. "He was in his early twenties, no top, faded jeans, no shoes nor socks, and black hair. I really don't like to repeat myself. Didn't everyone else already give you the _exact_ same description?" 

"I'm sorry Mrs. Hein," Upon pushing up her ever slipping glasses, Inspector Motoko flashed the elder woman a false smile also bearing with the same point of irritancy. "It has been a long day for me as well, but never the less someone called me to the premises and I have to do my job here and I will do it properly. It is my duty to interrogate you all the exact same way, so I'm afraid things may need to get repetitive." 

Shifting her weight, Kasher nodded aimlessly shushing young Peiter Hein who tugged at her skirt seam in his pure boredom. It was hard to blame such a young child however, for practically anyone would be un-enthralled to be stuck within a hotel lobby for the past few hours while supposedly touring Aimsa, Japan. And to top those matters off, poor Peiter was merely four and a half years old, with an aunt that did not exactly favour the idea of watching over him for two weeks straight. 

"Anyway," Kusanagi Motoko bowed her head momentarily to get a good look over the many notes she had jotted down, each resembling the last fairly clearly, except for one detail the young Motoko still had a hard time grasping. 

"Now Mrs. Hein, correct me if I'm mistaken, but you too mentioned this presence of 'wings' upon the male character?" 

"Yes, yes wings," Hein's head bobbed agreeably, as if the subject of people with flying obscurities upon their back was a daily issue. "How else could he fly? He flew with wings. I'm sure of it, those kind of things you don't see everyday." 

"I'll say..." Motoko shook her head still reading over the notes unbelievingly. Wings? Honestly, wings? She didn't expect this situation to be much of a hassle; truthfully she had been in quite some wonder on why they would call upon a detective for such a civilian case but apparently there was more to the simplicity of this issue than she thought. Still, wings? Maybe she had not seen it for herself, and maybe she did have a good dozen witnesses who did, but each time she heard the tale she became more and more doubtful. Wings? Why not just call upon the department of paranormal activity why don't ya... 

"Look detective," finally wearing with patience because of young Peiter's insistent whining, Kasher decided that her stay here could not be for much longer. "I already told you where that apartment is. I'm assuming you're still going to visit it, are you not?" 

"Right, unit 754, I remember. What did you say I should look for?" 

Kasher Hein gave yet another exasperated sigh; sometimes these employed adolescents could be so darn ignorant. 

"I told you already. I believe that the woman who had been with the man-" 

"The one that nearly got hit by Mr. Darwood's truck, am I right?" 

"Yes, yes her. The brown haired one. I think she was the one I spoke to at that apartment. It's worthy checking out... she sounded as if she were nervous... trying to hide something maybe." 

"Well then, I'll see into it," Motoko relieved to see a heads-up in her path, nodded her farewell. "Thanks for the tip, and your time Mrs. Hein. Hopefully this will all blow over nicely." 

"I'd hope so," Kasher brushed back a curled, pale blonde bang. "Or else I'm not staying in this hotel for one day extra... now get on with it Peiter, where's that damned candy machine already..." 

Kusanagi watched it a strange awe as the sniping woman disappeared further into the lobby of the Ramada by the checkout, the young adorable boy caught within her grasp. She was only lucky Kusanagi didn't work for Children's Aid or their talk would have had to be extended.... 

"Well anyhow," here eyes befell her notes once more. "Can't think of that right now. I have things to do and fairy tales to explain." 

And with that final connotation, Inspector Motoko made her way to the hotel elevators, waiting patiently for one to arrive. She had been here for quite a while now (what with the day having slipped her by) with not much of a speculative conclusion. Everything she seemed to stumble upon almost complicated things even further! Kusanagi didn't like the sound of how things were going, especially since she was alone on this one. Being fairly new to the local police force and also a young woman, it was Kusanagi's pure goal and ambition to carry out each of her duties successfully and efficiently. But never in her wildest expectations did she think she would come across something that could literally not be explained by her knowledge, or any for that matter! What was she to do now? How could this case ever close at this rate? Nothing here really was a crime, but nonetheless it still remained somewhat "unsolved". It seemed as if Kusanagi's very hope lay simply on what she would happen to find in this room, room #754. 

** PART FOUR CONTINUED - Time for Goodbye - **

It had all happened too quickly, then again, it's not like good things ever last. Everything that could have possibly come together had just swirled in this confusing palette of elements and events that in the end assembled a perfect picture whether it was for the better or for the worse. It was hard to deal with it really, the "reality", the actuality behind every second that passed. That consistent knowledge that all of these sub textual things which had come together so vividly was coming to an end…. Or was it? It almost seemed as if every inch of effort that had undergone to get this day where it was- this small yet defining moment in life - absolutely useless. What or where was the point? Just where was the moral of the story if things were just to go vanish as they had once done? It certainly cannot be that way a second time, can it? No, what a very foolish thing to say. One time was more than enough for Hitomi Kanzaki, but twice was not even an option. She had been given the miraculous opportunity to recollect what she could not bear without, and dammit, hell itself would have to freeze over before she would ever let such an awe-inspiring past slip her remembrance a second time. 

It had all happened too quickly, it just couldn't end now. 

But even at that almost meaningless hope, Hitomi knew that some things just couldn't be run from. Even standing here amongst the April chill, cold street lights providing little light and noisy Aimsa environment droning through her ears, she knew it was already too late. The ambulance was nowhere to be seen now, lost behind the common street sides and curves that a downtown area would obviously have. But even then, the commotion of Hitomi's once everyday world lay far from her concern. Although surrounding her at every single step and breath, it was this that she could no longer notice. She could not "see" reality; she could barely even feel it. Even when that detective woman had beckoned and argued with her to return to the seclusion of the hotel lobby, Hitomi couldn't bring herself to move. It was then that she wondered: if she was so stubborn now to leave where she stood, then why hadn't she gone? Why hadn't she gotten on that damned ambulance with him, why hadn't she remained so faithfully by his side as she deeply longed to do? If it was her only and strongest desire, then why wasn't she there, with him, close to him, caring for him? Why was she here? Why were they apart once more? 

It was a trivial question, one neither embellished nor factual in any way. There didn't seem to be any if many logical answers to her inquiry. The only thing Hitomi knew was that she was right. She _longed_ to be there. She longed for nothing more than to hold him again, to see his sweet face, to know that just for one extra second she could have him near… just for one extra second. 

But it hadn't gone that way. Things just didn't go that way. Time had been short, sweet and now ended. There was no turning back on decisions already made. Even standing here amidst the night, knowing that that precious "moment" had been only minutes ago, it still didn't deny the fact that it was gone like a quick breath. Things came and things went, whether she was strong enough to accept it or tough enough to live through it. Had it been her choice, time itself would have frozen right over when that moment had been. Every passing second would seem to stretch to an impervious end of infinity, far beyond the simple comprehension of time. Everything that was everything to her would remain dormant in those few and tender seconds that had passed her too quickly. If only it had been her choice. But instead, Hitomi Kanzaki was left with what even had been denied from her before: _memories_. At least she had them this time, those sensual vivid memories. They each came back to her, painted with a palette of detail, mixed with emotion, colour, voice and the sweet tinge that each memory would bring about. Just by standing here, staring out in what seemed like a city of nothingness as the chilly night breeze flooded her without knowing, she knew that she could not escape those memories. They drummed through her now, blending in to be something real and something not… to a point where she could just stand and stare, thinking, reliving, longing and hoping, constantly confusing what was now and what was then. 

* * *

Hitomi caringly took his hand, worried eyes particularly focused. She had feared it all this time, as she knew that apparently his conditions were far from normal, but to feel the chilling dampness of his soft hands worried her intently. _They were cold_. Although the hotel room was home to open windows and ajar doors, it still wasn't cold enough to feel the way Van felt; it had been a sad, icy tone that she didn't want to know was even there. Hitomi took a soft breath, trying to hide her concerned expressions, instead writing a smile upon her face as she stared towards the strong young man sitting alongside her, a quite adorable flush of pink running to his cheeks at the feel of Hitomi's affectionate hands upon his. 

"Are you sure you'll be okay, Van?" 

"Thanks to you I will," Van returned her smile, trying to hide the blush from 'pinkifying' his complexion as his gaze fell upon the bandaged leg Hitomi had taken such great care of. "It's not too much of a bother anymore." 

Hitomi smiled, partly contented. She couldn't as well be so down staring upon his bright wine-red eyes, just seemingly happy to be here regardless of what looked like a singeing painful wound. She shouldn't act so damn worried and a little happier, and deep inside… she really was. Despite all the strange awkwardness and far from usual situations that had just erupted into her once routinely life, it was all still a surprise for the better, for the MUCH better. Just merely being here, just feet away, no inches away even from this mystifying dream-like character gave her more than a deliriously happy feeling. To simply gaze upon his handsome features with a prideful mystic ere added by the city night's glow was enough for her eyes to feast upon day in and day out. It was just like she had imagined: walking into a dream. Even though Hitomi had been with whom she knew was Van Fanel for almost hours now, it seemed so different when one on one, they could speak to each other as they had been forbidden to do for too long. One on one Hitomi could finally face the loving memories that had been cleared off the surface of her thoughts. Finally, Hitomi could be where she had always longed to be. 

But then why? In this state of pure perfection, what could she be so upset about, why would she be so upset? She didn't want these anxious feelings plaguing her at a time too rare like this. Moments like these, gentle and divine don't last long and don't appear often. Hitomi knew this, maybe that was what upset her. Just knowing that such a time, such magnificence would never befall her again if the cycle repeated. If everything repeated just like it had nearly six years ago now. 

But staring upon Van's still youthful and challenging eyes, Hitomi had to deal with the saddening realization privately. They had been softly speaking in the hotel's seclusion for a while now, but each passing second and uncomfortable grunt Van made had churned her stomach with worry. She knew he was strong, she knew he was able to live through everything just to be here, and she admired Van's kindhearted endurance more than anything. But did that also mean that Van would be too reluctant to admit when he needed assistance? Hitomi's half-baked first aid job could not be the real answer to Van's injuries, could it? That wound… that sharp incision… it had gone deep and the blood was abounding. What if the cut went through an artery or something worse? What if all of the abrasions on his sore body became infected? He felt so chilled… so cold. What if… 

Hitomi bowed her head down suddenly, jerked with sadness at the idea and overpowering concern. She knew her time now was short, what was she wasting it all for worrying about such things? After now, Van would have to return home - he had told her himself of all the consequences that came with visiting her on earth. She gripped his hands tightly, searching for the physical comforting warmth she could feel from just being near him. The cycle would repeat. It was obvious now. Just like it happened near six years ago, they would be taken apart distances beyond understanding. For who knows how long Hitomi would be left alone from a past she was yet to fully know. But now, holding his hands so close to her, feeling his presence so near to her, feeling that longing of intimacy drawing to her, how could she spend her time now just being a worrywart? After today, she may not see Van ever again! 

An even deeper saddening came to her thoughts as she thought of Van's critical wound. 

There were two dreadful plays that came about when thinking that way… if Van didn't' get medical help soon… then also after today, _she may not see Van ever again._

"Hitomi, don't worry about it," Van gave a soft sigh after observing Hitomi, watching that line of pure anxiety stretch upon her pretty face. He knew she was worried, and maybe Hitomi did have good reason. But Van would never admit to her what really went on inside of him. He knew it'd be for the better if he didn't mention the extreme faintness he was beginning to experience, or the sudden way he felt so very cold. It was something that he didn't want to worry about at this time, and much the less he didn't want it to be Hitomi's concern either. 

Escaping one of his hands from her grip, Van raised his hand to tilt her chin up in his direction to keep her from pouting in that sad way as he delicately brushed back a sandy bang from hiding those beautiful eyes. It was a very "un-Van" thing to do, to react to her affection like that but all night it was all Van could do. He was doing everything practically without thought; reactions and actions coming to him like pure instinct. Normally, Van could not touch a woman like so. He could not even come so physically close to one for no apparent reason, it just really wasn't a concern of his. Van respected women equally, and didn't see it necessary to sherade them with flowers and flirtatious gestures. Van just didn't act like that, he never did and he had thought he never would. Come to think of it, Van Fanel, king of all Fanelia wasn't even concerned about possibly becoming married and raising an heir to his empire. Although that was a requirement, ever since "it" happened Van never gave another girl (much the less another wife) much thought if any at all. _Ever since' it' happened…_ ever since Hitomi Kanzaki had fallen into his life so long ago. 

* * *

"Is she going to be okay? We don't need to call a paramedic for her too do we now?" 

Lecward Bargera gave a hesitant glance in the familiar woman's direction. She gave no response even as his speck like eyes glared inceptively towards hers waving his hand deliberately in front of her face trying to catch her fogged attention. 

"Umm…. No, I doubt it," Kusanagi gave an inattentive glance towards the short superintendent, frowning as the ringing tone on the other end of her cell phone line just didn't seem to cease. 

"Dammit," she uttered miserably flipping it closed while dropping it into her coat pocket, then taking a long breath as she arched her neck back then spotted the concerned Lec still sitting by that woman and incessantly trying to catch one second's response. She couldn't help but let out a groan inside her mind - Kusanagi's shoes were too tight, this girl was too strange, this hotel was too stuffy, these crowds were too nosy, this whole damn case was too complicated … in other words: _this would be one very, very long night._

"She's not in shock is she??" Lecward gave a slightly frantic glance in the detective's direction, eyes darting with concern. Out of everything that happened today, he wouldn't have surprised if this young lady was going into cardiac arrest or something. It seemed everything that had happened didn't seem to account to any sense at all, and he doubted whatever was happening now made much sense either. 

Motoko Kusanagi gave a soft sigh, watching inquisitively as Lecward continued to prod at the Hitomi-woman's shoulder, as if still in feeble attempt to awaken her from that literally deadlocked state as they had both been doing for the last ten minutes or so now. 

"She should be fine, she walked inside here with us all on her own after all," Motoko then plopped down on the waiting seat next to Hitomi, trying to avoid all the strange stares coming from just about everyone else in the hotel lobby. There didn't seem to be one soul at the moment who didn't know of Hitomi's paralytic state, and Kusanagi couldn't as well shoo them all away. This was a public place after all, and now everybody surrounding them was exposed to dozens upon dozens of unanswered questions that somehow managed to fall most heavily upon her shoulders. Here she sat now amidst one of the strangest and without a doubt "most unique" cases ever, with too many witnesses, too many problems and too little time. 

"I'm worried, detective," Lecward Bargera stood himself taking in a deep breath and staring with pure perplexity out towards the vague hotel windows, where Hitomi Kanzaki's stare was fully fixed. "I mean, is this even normal? How much longer do you think she'll stay this way before she comes to?" 

"I wish I knew…" Motoko laid her chin in her hands miserably, suddenly realizing her own youthful incompetence. Surely an official elder of hers wouldn't be so transfixed on such tribulations, only a little league agent like her could face such numerous dead ends. 

Raising herself, trying to gain some ideas, she removed her heavy coat and instead placed it on Hitomi's shoulders, noticing that the girl had looked somewhat cold after standing out there aimlessly for so long. 

But really, what was Kusanagi to do now? Why did it seem as if everyone was depending on her anyway? It's not like she was a stupid expert in this kind of stuff… she just couldn't explain the unexplainable. Her job was to work with solid clues and facts, placing together a picture with everything she absorbed. But what was to absorb here? Every piece of the puzzle was like a piece taken from different jigsaw boxes… none of them fit with any of the others because each was a new picture in itself. That was like what it felt like: pure frustration. Nothing added up, nothing would add up, and she doubted nothing could add up and everything was simply meaningless upon itself. 

"Ms. Motoko, you don't have any ideas of what to do at all?" Apparently, whether Kusanagi was confident or not, Lecward was still depending on her every thought and move. 

"Well," Kusanagi put away the exasperated face and turned to stare at Hitomi, hoping for a second the girl would return the stare and just zap back into reality for just a second. A second was all she asked. But Kusanagi had already been shaking the life out of Hitomi's shoulders a few minutes ago and nothing seemed to catch her attention. It was behaviour unlike Kusanagi had ever encountered before, and now it caught her bewilderment pretty well. 

"I got someone at the department to run a check on her for me just a few minutes ago," she continued to explain to Bargera what she at least 'did know'. "They told me that Kanzaki Hitomi lives just off the suburbs near Greenwood station, roommates with somebody or other. I also found out that our unstable friend here underwent three years of psychiatric treatment starting when she was only _fifteen_." 

"Fifteen?" Lecward drew himself back towards Kusanagi after letting his eyes wander as he observed the Ramada, then glancing at Hitomi in disbelief. "My, that's awful young and awful long! Is that what you think is going on here… with her I mean? Some sort of psychological side effect or something?" 

Kusanagi bit her lip, staring at the inane and stilled Hitomi from the corner of her eye eerily wondering if she could hear each word they uttered. It was an equally strange thought to think of where Hitomi's mind was now anyway… lost adrift on the brink of human sanity.. 

"That was my guess too. They said she was attending sessions because of some sort of runaway case with her in high school. I also learned that Kanzaki here suffered from paranoia, emotional outbursts, major depression and even hallucinations." 

"Hallucinations…." Lecward seemed to repeat every word, as if thinking of it constantly would help him understand it even more. But as he gazed upon the young woman, he found it hard to think of her as mentally challenged in such ways because even though she was in that "fixed state", she didn't look like the kind that would be needing such treatments at such a young age. To him really, she looked kind of sad, as if trying to absorb something dramatic and successfully managing to block out her outer surroundings in the process. 

"Yeah, poor girl," Kusanagi sighed barely within earshot half in sorrow for the frozen Hitomi and also for her achingly tired self. "For all you know, she's suffering from some sort of crazy flashback as we speak." 

* * *

"Van…" 

Hitomi allowed the name to slip out under her breath, barely a whisper in the night as she felt the strangely enticing run of Van's hand upon her fore arm. He said no words, and acted as if he didn't need to. Hitomi was the same. It was like the best way to show each other what one thought, what one wished to communicate, was to feel it for themselves. To touch, to sense, to smell, to know - was everything that slowly brought the two closer and closer without even being aware of it. But perhaps Van did continue to gently brush back her hair, to allow his fingers to grace over hers, to stare into her eyes with a different glance than everybody else, what was most astounding was actually none of these things. The most astounding part of it all was that Hitomi would gladly sit and receive Van's rare affection. It was not normal for such a conservative girl to become so close, so drawn to a man that was not her own, but no… Hitomi didn't _feel_ wrong. This felt _right_. In everything and everyway. Hitomi knew this was right. How could she deny it? How could she ignore the way her heart so abundantly flustered within her, the way her body tingled with happiness to feel him smile at her, touch her wrists with those soft hands, stare upon her with those honest eyes. Van was a character that was so very unlike the rest. To Hitomi, Van was both fictional and real, near and also far. It was hard to believe she was really there with him - but she was. Despite all of the time barriers and incredible distances, Hitomi could fully sense that still throughout it all, the object of her affection had never really been altered. Although his eyes were not those of a rambunctious teen any longer as she had remembered them, they were still as honest and meaningful as ever, yet also matured and wise. Van showed that he was longing and needing just like Hitomi was at this point. She also was a different person than Van remembered, being independent and adult. But that was the special part of it all. It was the truth that although everything that was everything had worked to keep them apart both physically and mentally, there really just wasn't anything that could do that. Despite differences, distances and even time, nothing really could keep them apart inside. 

"Hitomi… I want you to forget me," Van lay his hand softly on her cheek as he said those words, honest and declarative, yet packing in their own personal pain at the simple saying of such things. 

"When I leave you tonight, don't turn back, alright? Walk away from this. Forget Gaea, forget Fanelia, and please, _forget me_." 

"What are you saying?" Hitomi's hand raised to meet his, meet the cold surface of his skin until she realized just how faint his voice was beginning to become. That sickening worry compelled her again - half for his own sake, the other half anxious over the saddening meaning of his words. 

"Van, I can't forget you again. I won't forget you again! _Why would you say such things?_" 

Green eyes shuttering with moistened blinks, Hitomi took Van's hand warmly against hers, drawing him close to trust her words. At that point, Van knew that was she said was true. He had faith in Hitomi, he knew that the very last desire she would ever have would be to let go a second time, and God only knew that Van felt the exact same way. 

But it was different - Van had remembered. All this time, Van had never forgotten her, and it had been one of the most lonesome feelings he had ever had to live through. One so isolated and forlorn that it had forced Van to search for her, to find her, to keep her. And so, here Van was, worlds and galaxies away from his own reality to chase after something he still couldn't let go. But now Van realized his mistake. By returning, Van had taken away that freedom Hitomi had. Hitomi had had the freedom of forgetting. She didn't live through the loneliness; her heart was not plagued by memories each day and each night. She had been living a successful and promising life, that is, until now. Until Van had to restore that beautiful yet painful truth - There was love in their hearts, but it was a love neither of them could ever share or fully know. 

"Van! Answer me! Why?? Don't you care… don't you want me to miss you???" 

Hitomi, stung by his lost expression, hurt by the pain in his words, felt herself uncontrollably fall into his arms, fall into the sweet depth that was Van, and nurture her head on his shoulder, gripping him tightly for all she was worth. She was not going to let go. She was not going to let go, and that was going to be that no matter what. 

"Van, I'm not going to let go of you. Not again. I'm not." 

"H.. Hitomi…" Van felt the young body enclose upon his, those soft arms holding his back so closely that there seemed to be no space between them at all. Although surprised and taken off guard, Van still knew that it was one of the most unique yet wonderful feelings that he would ever come to experience. A simple hug - a simple physical action of two bodies yet meaning more than just that. Van had only held her this way once before, once before the very first time they had said goodbye It was one of those things that had never managed to escape from Van's memories. Those hands pressing upon his back, moist tears on his shoulder, and even the comforting beats of a neighbouring heart - these were all the things that Van could never forget even if he tried. And now, it seemed he would be adding onto those memories no matter how painful the loneliness would become. 

"Hitomi…" he whispered her name once more, as the two linked silhouettes became even more raveled in their soft moment of intimacy. 

"I've missed you Hitomi…"   
He let the words tickle behind her ear, as she nudged her head closer to his, as he felt her body press closer to his feeling her tears cool his skin. 

_'That's why I want you to forget me. Losing you was more painful than anything else I've ever had to endure; nothing burned through me so hurtfully as it did when I saw you leave me six years ago. I'm just trying to protect you from that pain, so unlike me, you won't have to spend your life living in this past of ours.'_

He paused, closing his eyes and tightening his embrace. 

" God, I missed you Hitomi. I've missed you so much." 

Her breaths came out uneven, her heart seemed to steal the scene. It pounded so loudly, she was afraid he would hear it, but somehow knew that he did hear it and somewhere in there, was the beat of his own heart worrying just the same way. She understood his words - though cold to the ear's listen but still necessary for many to speak and to hear. Just like always, like before and always ever after, Van wanted her to be happy. That was why he wanted her to forget him… just so she could pursue another life of that fabricated happiness that she lived without Van. 

But didn't Van realize that was the last thing in the world that she wanted to be happy? Hitomi could never really be happy if it were all on things that didn't actually pertain to who Hitomi was. If one were to take away everything about her beloved Van and everything about this moment, and those tender memories from so long ago, then just how much of Hitomi would there actually be left? Didn't he know that her happiness didn't lie in what he could give her, but instead, in Van himself? 

Well, if this were to really be, to actually be, the last time in her entire life that this opportunity would occur, she would just have to tell him. There was no better way to express all of her growing thoughts and affections. 

Hitomi just had to tell him. She had to tell him everything, absolutely everything she could never say ever again in her lifetime. She had to tell him what he could not go without knowing. She had to.  
_There was no better way to say it, no better time than now._

**_"Van… I love you."_**

And without much else of a word, in a moment swift and defining, Hitomi moved forwards and allowed her lips to fall upon his for the very first time and quite possibly the last. It was a sensation overwhelmed with every emotion, every thought, every desire, every word and every longing - the very summary of all things that everything had been closely adding up to. This was the unknown and lonely image of the undeniable love shared between Hitomi and Van, represented best by one first and last single, sweet kiss. 

_ In the arms of an angel_

fly away from here

from this dark cold hotel room

and the endlessness that you fear

you are pulled from the wreckage

of your silent reverie

you're in the arms of the angel

may you find some comfort here

you're in the arms of the angel

**may you find some comfort here.**


	13. Paradise Broken Part I

**13.) Paradise Broken - Part One**

"Kagome… Kandern….Kanzaki. Ah… This must be it!" 

San Aszkielowicz tapped the apartment listings' glass proudly, finger poised directly in front of the Kanzaki apartment code. 

"2-6-7-1…" Brushing back a lock of that same mahogany brown hair, she repeated the numbers to herself as if to ease them into memory then looking confoundedly at the apartment-buzzing device off to her left. The number pad and speaker were obvious enough for usage, but unfortunately San was not exactly up to date with these new computerized buzzing systems. She gazed inanely at the bright, glowing blue screen that greeted her, bold black letters flashing, "Welcome to Meadow Garden Apartments" in about three different languages. Swallowing slightly, she hesitantly glanced around for instructions on how on earth to navigate this thing, aware that her Japanese comprehension skills were poorer than poor as observed by her aunt Hikoro not long before. 

_"Now are you sure you can take care of yourself, San?"_ Hikoro Kanzaki had stated worriedly before San had been just about to part to pay a surprise visit to her about-to-be-wed cousin. 

_"I'll be fine!"_ She had stupidly replied albeit the fact that she had never visited Japan before without her mother's guidance. _"I just can't wait to see Hitomi again! Thanks for all of your help Auntie Hikoro!"_

And with that San had waved off boarding a train late in the evening and somehow, while frantically scanning through her aunt's written instructions, she managed to make her way successfully to the lobby of Hitomi's apartment building within a few minutes. She too had been surprised to hear that the Kanzaki family had not expected her coming! There she had sat miserably in the Osaka Airlines sitting foyer just the day before, neck aching, head throbbing surrounded by dozens upon dozens of oriental strangers in a land she really did not know well without company around. Her enthusiasm on her visit had quickly died down as hours and hours had literally passed her by. Eventually, caught adrift in the throng of waiting passengers, San had figured that something must have gone wrong. After all of the planning for her arrival and her duty as bridesmaid, she had highly doubted anything could go wrong, but boy, was she ever mistaken! It turned out her relatives thought she would be coming a whole week later, and weren't even prepared for her arrival! Thankfully, she still had the phone number of her aunt in mind, and it wasn't long after before Hikoro Kanzaki had come to pick her up equally shocked to hear of the confusion. And having not yet seen her favorite same-aged cousin in over three years, San had of course been antsy to visit Hitomi the second she could - they were much like sisters after all, and plus Hitomi was getting married! But the fact that it would now become a surprise visit in result of the schedule mix-up, the whole thing would become even better. 

That is, if she only knew how to work the damn buzzer. 

Pulling her purse strap higher up her shoulder, San gave a heave of a breath - Out of all of the problems to expect on being a foreigner; this sure hadn't been one of them. 

"Do you need some help?" 

Startled, San quickly turned to face the open air, then lowering her eyes she realized her confounded attention had been caught by none other than a small, young boy. He stared up at her with blue eyes nearly smiling, and blonde wispy bangs falling near his ears. 

"Why… sure…" she replied hesitantly, after all, finding it to be the first time where she had to require assistance from a ten-year-old or so stranger. "That'd be very nice of you." 

"It's no problem," he replied, cheery cheeks and happy smiles, walking over beside the keypad showing her which buttons did what. 

"My sister and I saw you by the listings," the boy continued, referring to the strange, hooded girl he stood beside. San noticed that she looked a bit older than he was, and strangely dressed in layer after layer even though the weather was finally turning quite nice. 

"I couldn't help but notice you're looking for Kanzaki Hitomi as well." 

"Hitomi?" San looked at him inquisitively. "You two know her too?" 

The boy nodded, eyes still bright, "Yes, we used to be neighbours with her before she moved here." 

"Really?" San grew to even more interest, smiling at both the boy and the girl although noticing that she could never really catch a good glimpse of the older sibling. 

"So you live near Tsutomu Lake too, don't you? Why, I'm staying at her mother's home… so that must mean I'm right next door to you!" 

Suddenly, the young boy's face took a pinkish flush. The older girl, whom had not yet uttered a word, flashed him a warning glance menacingly. It was obvious that she was apparently worried about the frail web of lies her 'little brother' was profusely spinning. If he didn't watch his words carefully, he may find the both of them tangled in his fabled mess. 

But it seemed at that moment luck decided to join their side as a crackle abruptly came over the speaker and a jolly voice came on tone. 

"Kanzaki & Corain residence!" 

San glared at the speaker inattentively, and then suddenly noticed that neither the boy nor his older sister were saying anything. She couldn't help but find that peculiar but decided to take over from there. 

**"Hello? Is that you Hitomi?!"** Practically shouting the words, she neared to the speaker as close as possible, not really knowing the fact that Meadow Gardens was a newly remodeled structure and everything was up to date, meaning that there really was no need to speak so loudly and she was probably just deafening the person on the other end. 

**"HELLO? It's SAN ASZKIELOWICZ! HITOMI??"**

There was a short pause… then another voice quickly stole into the scene. 

"San…? Hitomi's cousin?" Just like many others, the voice came in with quite the shock to learn of San's presence so early in the week. 

"Yes!" 

"Oh my! San, if you remember me from a few years ago, this is Hitomi's friend, Yukari Uchida! She's not home right now - she should be back soon - but her roomy Cathy and me are here! I'll buzz you up, okay?" 

"Oh hello Yukari!" San smiled brightly, relieved to here a familiar voice She still easily remembered the maroon haired close friend of Hitomi's she had met long ago when they had all been in their teens, back when San's mother would take her to Aimsa for frequent visits. "It's been a while! Yes, that would be great, doumo arigatou gozai-masu!" 

"Hey, no prob fellow bridesmaid. And don't worry about it, we're English speakin' in Aimsa…. The Foreigner Friendly City. Hurry on up, k?" 

Being even more relieved to hear of the flexibility of the language situation since her last visit so long ago, San quickly turned her attention as the door standing adjacent to the three began emitting an alien high-pitched tone and the adolescent girl quickly took hold of it, allowing the young boy and San Aszkielowicz to enter in before her. 

She waited however until the boy was within her grasp, before hoisting him back towards her gently. 

"Is that…??" She inquired, referring to the second voice they all had heard from the speaker system. "If it is, she'll recognize you, won't she?" 

"Yes," he replied quietly, hiding his whisper from San's hearing. "If that's Yukari Uchida up there, we've stepped right into hot water." 

The girl flashed him a vindictive glance, yellow eyes circling, "Good job, genius. Old neighbours with Hitomi? Really… you should have known that would backfire somehow. Besides, she's not even home. Did you even plan this out at all?" 

San, hearing the discussing words of the children behind her, turned towards their direction as she pressed upon a lit button to call on an elevator. 

"Shall we go up together, guys?" She gave a cheerful smile, delighted to know there were so many people to get reacquainted with, although equally disappointed in Hitomi's temporary absence. 

The young boy turned his attention away from making a smart comment back to his supposedly elder sister, and then smiled once more in San's direction. 

"Yes, of course. We've gone too far to turn back now." 

* ** 

"So… how's he doing?" Kusanagi Motoko stared bluntly through the glass, gazing at the young man on the other side asleep under a layer of hospital sheets. From here, he looked so lost and helpless, just as Kusanagi was easily feeling in this exceedingly long day. 

"He's doing just great," Nurse Kaye Joi nodded her reply, staring over the young man's record sheet so far. He really hadn't been as hard to work with as the paramedics had warned… maybe it was because he had finally tired out. Just by looking at his paled complexion and observing his sudden dire need for water, Kaye had instantly sensed that he was suffering from quite the lack of blood. 

"The stitches were a simple procedure," Nurse Joi continued staring also through the hospital glass. "We were only lucky that his blood type was available in vast supply today. The medication should only keep him out for a few more hours, and if it is for official reasons we'll grant you the permission to interview him later on. But I'm afraid his background has been as troublesome to trace as you said it would be." 

Kusanagi frowned; she had expected that but still had stayed afloat with optimism. 

"So, you found no records on 'Van Fanel', did you?" 

"Well, we did get a couple. But those were from the international records online and neither of the males we found were anywhere close to the one here, and besides that, both of the other records belonged to people outside of Japan. You know, he could as well be taking on an alias…" 

Motoko nodded vaguely, recalling that Hitomi's rash words warning her of something like this. 

_ "He's not of this world…" _

Those words… they really didn't make sense. But still, recalling the moment when that young, paled girl had flashed back to attention had overflowed her with information that was so vast to understand. Everything of that moment had probably doused both Kusanagi and Lecward Bargera into flooding headaches, but there wasn't anything much else to go by. The scary part was, the more time went on - the more Hitomi's unbelievable story began to check out. 

"That's alright," Kusanagi nodded a second time. "We'll figure out soon enough." 

"But detective," Nurse Joi sighed sullenly gazing too at the lonely character dozing quietly. "I'm afraid the hospital will need a relative or close friend of his to provide some information on this guy or I have no idea how much longer we can keep him here. Sorry but people don't stay in the hospital for free." 

"I'll talk to my supervisors about that," Motoko replied darkly, realizing that this man's lack of acquaintances on this planet proved to be making the situation even worse. "The woman he was with isn't in very fitting conditions herself. I sent her home, but we might be able to call her up later tonight. Hopefully, the department can get something worked out concerning the costs." 

"Alright then," Kaye Joi smiled with the energy she had left, holding the clipboard back against her chest. "I better be off to attend to the other patients. When you hear of any news concerning him, please alert the front desk." 

"No problem," Kusanagi Motoko attempted a courteous smile as she watched the nurse round the corner and disappear from sight within the strange, blank hospital walls. How Kusanagi hated hospitals; she found these kinds of places absolutely nauseating. That may be quite odd to hear from someone who works in the police force, but she was no doctor. She'd rather not spend her time thinking of dissecting things and more time on who got shot by what or whom. 

Turning away from that odd thought, her glance fell a second time upon the reflecting window of Van's hospital room. There he lay, motionless within deep contempt, and also "wingless" as she had so dismaly expected. With such an array of witnesses, it was still hard to believe that Kusanagi coudn't come to believe one word they had uttered. There were no wings here, obviously. So however it was that this man "flew" as so unanimously claimed was beyond her explanation. Frankly, she barely could grasp the concept even to this time and hour. It still made no sense. However, if it made no sense, then why did those strange accusations seem to eerily fit that girl's words? Somehow, the nearly crazy "winged" theory came equal to that Hitomi's words.. didn't it? If not, then why couldn't it escape Motoko's thoughts? Even now, she still couldn't quite get her mind to clear from those momentous words. 

_"You have to let him go! Please!"_ She had begged so earnestly, practically tugging at Kusanagi's arm in demand. 

_"You don't understand. Just let Van get better, but he must return home after that." _

"Hitomi, what home?" She had asked, full of impatience. 

_"His home! He's not from this world… You won't understand. But please, don't do anything to him. Please don't hurt Van." _

"Kanzaki, I'm an investigator, not a mad scientist. Now what in the hell are you talking about?" 

"Please… just let him go…" 

For some reason, that girl's words, her tone, her voice, her image was still lying so incredibly emblazoned in Kusanagi's memory. She didn't know why; it's not like she never dealt with traumatic people before. It was practically normal to run into some over-reactors in a job like her own, but there was something almost melancholic in the look that she saw in Hitomi's expression. It had come like a shock when Hitomi had awakened from that frozen state, acting totally appalled and almost even panicked. That's when Hitomi Kanzaki started to say things that didn't make much sense to Kusanagi at all; things that related to all the oddities that were happening but she just couldn't recognize how anything fitted together. As much as she had wanted to try to comprehend what was happening, Kusanagi had reluctantly sent the disturbed Hitomi back to her home in a taxicab after the girl was already escorted out of the Ramada under Bargera's concerned orders. At first Motoko had reacted angrily to such inconsiderate actions towards the apparently sick woman, but it made sense after a while. Because of Hitomi's frantic pleas and cries, a crowd had then started to gather. And so, rather than taking her back to the head office for further questioning, Kusanagi had sacrificed her own free time to allow Hitomi to leave and to let this case hang open for a little longer. Of course, if an official elder were to find out of such recklessness, they would be upset and highly questioning her judgment, but Kusanagi just couldn't look at that woman's heartbroken image for one second longer. That Hitomi needed a whole lot of rest; she needed to return back to the norms of her life as much as Kusanagi wished to return to the norms of her own. 

Sighing, she stared into the hospital room; straight to the young man that woman had so fondly spoken of. She didn't want to see her again. Kusanagi didn't to see or feel any of this unexplainable sadness that Hitomi possessed any longer, but it looked as if she would have to. Kusanagi Motoko knew this. She had to solve this case, not for the sake of her own profession, but because there was more hanging on this than just profession itself. 

"You have to let him go." 

Ever still, the outstanding words rung in her mind. Why on earth did Hitomi say that? What was so wrong about being in the hospital anyway? Van was getting help here… wasn't that what she had wanted? 

"…I'm afraid his background has been as troublesome to trace as you said it would be." 

But what about what that nurse had said? Could that… could that possibly have any relation to what Hitomi was so avidly worried about? It would make sense if Hitomi wanted to protect him from getting caught or arrested or something of the sort because of the jumbled identities. Maybe there was something more dismal to this man's past than the obvious was letting on… 

Kusanagi's eyes narrowed. Maybe that was it… maybe this Van of hers was some sort of illegal alien, smuggled into the country from somewhere or other and that Hitomi was directly involved doing her best to protect him from prying eyes. For all Kusanagi knew, there could be some sort of strange criminal circle going on here… as it usually is with people that have no identities, or women who get pulled out of school to attend therapy sessions at the age of fifteen. 

But that was so audacious to say, wasn't it? As much as Motoko wanted to believe that more logical explanation, she knew honestly and truly it didn't fit at all. Criminal action and illegal doings as such wouldn't have induced that look on Hitomi's face. That look of pure sadness and anxiety was not one of a fiend but much moreover, the look of a kindhearted person in a very inconsolable world. 

Sighing once more, Kusanagi took a quick look around. 

The coast was clear. 

Laying her hand quietly on the door, Kusanagi Motoko waited until the hospital corridors were vacuous enough for her to slither unnoticed into the room of Van Fanel's. If this case wouldn't solve on its own, she would have to do something about that - and she knew she had to do something now. 

***

"Kid, just what do you think you're trying to pull here?" 

Hands on hips and voice all cynical, Yukari Uchida made quite the most intimidating impression leaning her weight casually against the 5B apartment doorway, directing a suspicious glare towards the young boy and his older female company. 

"I just happen to personally know the Mayo family when Hitomi was neighbours with them," she continued on, brushing back a lock of highlighted auburn hair confidently. "And I'm sorry to say it, but they only had two kids, Joey and Grace, and you and you're sister are not them. So cut the crap and tell me what's going on here, Steven, or should I say, 'Shied' Schezar." 

Both Catherine and San, standing side by side from within the apartment, gave each other an apprehensive glance as they watched the rather demanding Yuikari hosting her defeating argument against the two strangers. San had only just arrived a few minutes earlier, but it wasn't long before the once elated Yukari ran across the all-too-familiar face of young Shied Schezar, of which she now knew his true alias. It wasn't, however, something that neither Merle nor Shied were trying to avoid. Although, meeting with Yukari had not been on the agenda (neither was the fact that Yukari now knew Shied's first name), it was something they may as well have dived into. It wasn't like the two were planning to stick around on the Mystic Moon for much longer anyway. 

"So I take it you remember me," Shied replied dryly, trying to buy himself some time until Hitomi returned. "You're the one that 'supposedly' works at Mikami's Fine Cuisine." 

Yukari's eyebrows narrowed and her face grew somewhat redder. 

"Well then," she answered sighing dropping down a level of righteousness. "I guess that makes us both liars. But I was just trying to find out what was up with you. Now, I'm starting to wonder the very same thing - you know kid, you must be the youngest little stalker that I've ever seen." 

"We're not stalking you," A harsh tone lamented from nowhere, and in seconds all eyes gazed upwards to the appropriately disguised figure hovering to the boys' left. 

"Who are you?" Cathy asked softly, deciding to somehow pitch in before this turned into an accusing verbally raging battle. "As a matter of fact, who are the both of you if not Hitomi's previous neighbours?" 

At the sound of the expected question, Merle and Shied's eyes met in doubtful glare. Both knew it would be a foolish action to answer the woman's question in pure truth, but all the same, both knew that progression would be difficult to achieve if there wasn't an eligible explanation on just who they were in this world. It seemed that Shied's little lies were catching up to him faster than he could escape it, so obviously something different would have to be done. 

"We're Hitomi's friends, old friends," Merle spoke a second time, a strangely strong adolescent voice amongst the crowd. Her gleaming yellow eyes however were only directly fixed on the opposing Yukari figure. 

"I'm afraid we can't tell all of you the reasons why we're here. We can only tell you." 

"Me?" Yukari gazed at the girl questionably, quite startled as a matter of fact to know that somehow, these strange people seemed to always know her, seemed to know every move a step ahead of time. Also, it was one of the only moments where anyone asides from Shied or Van actually got a good look in Merle's direction before she quickly re-hid her face behind her jacket hood. Yukari had easily noticed the strangely dark reddish skin colour, with eyes like she had never seen before. 

"Yes, you," Shied answered for her, starting to understand Merle's drift on things. "Hitomi's good friends with you, so we're sure you must have at least a vague idea on who we are more so than the other two." 

"Hey!" Cathy Corain objected abruptly, stepping up by Yukari's side. "I may not have known Hitomi too long, but we're all her bridesmaids, and San here is her cousin! We're all concerned for her. Don't you think we all have the right to know if there is something important to be dealt with?" 

"This isn't something that you would want to hear," Merle replied coldly, knowing that these friends of Hitomi's may be concerned, but she remembered what Van had told her once back in the hotel. Sometimes, what you don't know can't hurt you, and if that was the case, Merle knew that the fewer amounts of people that knew of Gaea and their existence, the fewer problems there would be for either sides of the Mirror Window. 

Neither Cathy nor San made haste to reply, both only curious on what was to be said. Moreover, Yukari herself was dying with the same anticipation, worrying to the utmost highest of Hitomi's conditions. It had been a few hours now since Hitomi had parted, with those ironing words that still hadn't left her thoughts. 

"I just have to see him again…" 

Yukari had doubted that they meant what she feared, but with these two strange people standing before her that very instant, she knew that she now faced exactly what she feared. 

"You will tell all of us," Yukari stated confidently, deciding it would be for the better if she didn't hear such dire things alone. "I want others to be able to confirm that this happened. Everything will stay in here, but if you don't tell them, then you won't get any help from me." 

"What makes you think we need help from you?" Shied replied smartly, challenging her once more to come up with something. 

"I know you do," Yukari refused to let her guard down. "Don't go on and bluff on me. You seem to weirdly know a lot about myself and Hitomi, and I don't know how you knew that I or Amano would be at Mikami's that night, but I do know that you're trying to learn things about us. I can tell you what's happened to Hitomi since then. I've been by her side, so anything you need to know, I know." 

"Since then…?" Catherine's tone trailed inceptively. "Since when? You can't be speaking of that thing again, that Time… can you, Yukari?" 

Yukari nodded at Catherine's confused gaze. It was no wonder that these two had only wished to speak with Yukari; with Cathy and San involved there would be the often repetition of already answered questions. But Yukari didn't want to be alone with them. If this was just as strange as Hitomi had made it seem five and a half years ago, she did not want to be alone with these two at all. 

"Alright then," Merle cooperatively agreed, confident in the girl's words. There wasn't much time left, and things had to be solved now. Neither her nor Shied were doing this for their own sake. It was for someone much more dear to them, much more dear to her. 

"But wait a minute," San, after having observed the easily strangest of strange things to be observing, decided to chip in her two cents. She knew that she was already lost beyond rescue, but she did want to clarify one thing. 

"How do any of us know you're telling the truth?" She especially directed her gaze to the once adorable boy whom had so willingly lied to her about the whole "neighbours" thing just a while ago. "What's not to say that the two of you aren't lying again? You haven't even told us your reasons for wanting to know or speak with Hitomi." 

"We're not lying," Merle declared in a matter-of-fact tone. "You or the other girl won't understand, but Hitomi will, and maybe even you, Yukari." 

Yukari's attention once again befell the mysterious Merle, and then suddenly trying to hold back a garbled gasp as that "mysterious Merle" added heavily on the frenzy of questions as she quickly raised a furry paw-like hand to promptly draw back her hood. 

"There," With a dimmed voice almost even hiding in shame, Merle held up her face and hands for all to see. "Now what's not to believe?" 

"Merle!" Shied heckled abruptly, grabbing one of her paws and hiding it with his hands, worry overcoming him at Merle's revelation of herself. "What on earth do you think you're doing?!" 

"Let it be!" Merle hissed in reply, jerking her hands away from him quickly, then softening her image at the young boy's surprised face. "I'm sorry Shied, it's just that I'm sick of hiding in these things now. Besides, what other way is there to prove what we need to say?" 

Shied sighed softly, deciding not to reply and instead turned his direction towards the three unspeaking totally flabbergasted faces. With eyes wide and jaws left hanging, none of the three women said a word for a total of nearly twenty agonizing seconds. Shied couldn't help but lower his eyes in pity - it must have been so hard for Merle to be different in this world. 

"Well, I'm not going to bite you," Merle commented lamely, rolling her eyes with the slit-like pupils and then returning her gaze to the three women. Although her arms were crossed and her temper was wavering, somewhere deep within, Merle felt much more hurt by their inaudible response than she felt upset. 

"I'm sorry…" Cathy hushed quickly. "I didn't mean to be rude. I'm Catherine." 

San and Yukari could only watch in a strange, speechless observance as the small Catherine, only about the size of Merle herself, stepped forward and reached a hand upwards to brush Merle's face gently, whiskers running against her fingers. 

Merle stepped backwards slightly, surprised at the action, pupils constricting suspiciously. But moreover, she was much more surprised at the soothing calmed expression written on Cathy Corain. 

"Don't worry," Cathy assured, smiling at both Merle and Shied, then taking Merle's furry wrist and pulling her inwards. "Come inside, we won't let anyone else know your secret." 

Quietly, both Shied and Merle took a seat in Hitomi's living room, as Yukari unsurely locked the door and gazed in their direction. This didn't feel right; it didn't feel right at all. This couldn't be really actually happening, could it? But how could Yukari deny it? That girl who so easily resembled a humanized version of a feline was sitting in her best friend's apartment right this very instant. Although Hitomi had told her the strange happenings of the "Time" quite a few years ago, Yukari still had nebulous ideas on what she had been speaking of. She remembered a few things, not with the greatest amount of detail, but certainly she had not easily forgotten the characters that Hitomi had mentioned so emphatically. Of course, back then it was hard to picture such absurd and offset things, but what about now? How could Yukari turn away from such fantasies when they now stared her right in the face… every bit as real as she still so ghastly feared. 

San Askielowicz took a seat across from the strange little creature, thinking to herself about a dozen thoughts a second. She felt so totally lost and confused on what on earth was happening, that she didn't even long to question it. Although not wishing to pay any disrespect, she still found her eyes curiously wandering in that girl's direction, studying the alien features so closely with her eyes. San felt like screaming, like running quickly the other way for all she was worth. San could just sense that that girl was not lying, that really was her under that strange appearance of fur and stripes. It wasn't movie magic or clever costumes; it was unbelievably real. San figured that was what frightened her most, that was what made her choke in wordlessness to actually be with something that otherwise would not exist. Like Catherine, she longed to stretch and touch the thing, to make sure it was not just a strange creation of the imagination, but San knew that it would be a fruitless gesture. She already knew that that girl was everything but unreal. As strange and intimidated as she was beginning to feel, she knew she had to mature here and try to grasp at least a fraction of what was going on. 

"So, the two of you are waiting to speak with Hitomi, right?" Catherine, as usual, was the first to overcome her questioning doubts and smile with a forced friendliness to the boy and the cross-species before her. 

Merle, still feeling somewhat mortified and still refusing to return their stares, gave a soft sigh. 

"Yes, although we do want to see her again; we're not here for our own sake." 

"Not for your sake? Then who's?" Yukari couldn't help but question, sitting herself by San and allowing her gaze to stare out through the balcony doors to avoid being tempted to stare rudely at the cat-girl. Night had easily settled and it was actually starting to get rather late. Where the heck was Hitomi anyway… 

"No," Shied continued, glancing at this watch with the same wandering question that Yukari had. "We're here for our friend, Van Fanel." 

"Van Fanel?!" Both Catherine and Yukari loudly chorused at the sound of the achingly familiar name, instantly recalling it from the session-tape-fetish just that morning. 

However, Yukari herself was engrossed now in more interest than any other, the ring of that recognizable day still loud in the memories of her past with Hitomi. 'Van Fanel, Van Fanel,' It went without saying, that name had been a solid factor in their teenage years. Now that she thought about it, the details started to come back to her quicker than ever before. Although her thoughts remained foggy on the exact words or places, she could still recall Hitomi, young and worrisome, constantly repeating that name, telling Yukari things that she could only struggle to believe. At that time, the name Van Fanel was something nonsensical; something lying way out in a world where fantasy and imagination were stored. In other words, the character that Hitomi so fondly spoke of was everything but real. She didn't like to doubt her own best friend so heavily as she had at that time, but who was to blame Yukari? Who honestly believed Hitomi's story? The truth was nobody did. Not one person could salvage a word of truth from Hitomi's tales. Maybe that was why these strange people were here years later, to rectify the doubting mistakes of Hitomi's supposed friends and family. Well that thought sure made her feel downright rotten inside. It was the guilty realization that in all this time of doubt and neglect, Hitomi had been telling the truth. 

"You know of him, don't you?" Merle turned her glance towards Yukari, observing as the energetic woman seemed to be more silenced in contemplation. 

"I figured Hitomi must have told you about him." 

"Of course," Yukari responded quietly, keeping her direction away from the cat-girl and instead watching as she quietly cracked her knuckles in guilty thought. She wasn't avoiding the girl's eyes this time because of the unnatural appearance, but moreover, she didn't want these strangers to see just how guilty she was starting to feel. 

"So who are you people?" Brushing back a bang, she lifted her head, deciding to venture on to other curiousities. 

"I am Prince Shied Schezar, and this is Van's close acquaintance, Merle," Shied granted the three a friendly and polite smile, as he was so accustomed on doing. 

San's brown eyebrow couldn't help but raise slightly, amused at the intelligent fashion of such a young child. Honestly, she was still trying to figure out when some straight-faced mopey person here would liven up and admit this was all an act Somewhere in her, she figured the Merle-girl was hopefully nothing more than an incredible costume job and this boy a very skilled actor. She didn't know what went on around this country, but this was just not on her list of expectations. 

Shied turned to the cousin's direction whom had so suddenly stood, looking as if her temple was about to explode. He had to try and hide a smile; he had known that there would be those here that would have trouble trying to conceive what they were saying. Both Merle and him had understood that Yukari would probably be the only one capable of grasping their words, and so far they proved right. The San woman, who achingly did resemble Hitomi, seemed to be more frustrated than confused, and the Catherine woman still looked as pleasant as usual, but her image seemed to tweak with a lost expression. 

"So you mean to tell me kid, that you're a prince?" San raised her skepticism vocally. 

"He is a Prince, a Duchy of a proud country and almost ready to become Duke actually," Merle answered hastily before Shied could even pipe up a response. If anything, she absolutely hated criticism, especially when Merle and Shied were more right than wrong. 

"I see," San plopped her herself back down on the opposing sofa and brushed back a hair. She didn't really mean to be rude (albeit the fact that she was still upset at these two for having lied to her) but it was more like she had been testing the response. That girl seemed highly confident in her words however, and the longer San looked into those lingering feline eyes, the more she became sickly aware that this was no lie. These people… these things were not… human…. Were they? Surely the girl wasn't, the boy maybe, but not Cat Woman over there. So if they weren't human, then just what were they? _Princes? Princesses?_ Of what? And where? What country did she speak of? _Just who or what were these people?_

"That's impressive. You rule over a country?" Cathy's voice echoed next, seeming to follow right on San's train of thoughts. She felt the need to keep this conversation going. Both Yukari and San had silenced in their views and Cathy knew that Hitomi wasn't going to miraculously arrive anytime soon. And even if she did, at least talking to these two would get them all to understand a little more background information before they all started talking with Hitomi about who knows what. 

"My homeland is Frade, a country in our distant world called Gaea." 

"Woah there," San raised herself once more, the sofa springs complaining at her sudden movement. "DISTANT WORLD? Kid, what are you talking about? Look, I know I'm not from here and obviously you aren't either but you can't just expect people to-" 

"Please, San, their telling the truth." 

The voice seemed to silence all thoughts as all heads turned to the highlighted prettiness of Yukari Uchida. 

"They're from Gaea. Trust them." 

"B-but Yukari!" San couldn't help but protest flashing her a quizzical look. "Do you know what they're talking about??" 

Sighing Yukari lifted her head and nodded slightly, "Not too much, but I have an idea. I didn't think this was true either when Hitomi told me of it, but now I can't see how I can deny it." 

"So you guys are from another world…" Catherine pondered aloud as a violent shiver took over her at the thought. It seemed strange just to hear the words from her own mouth. It was like saying "I have a flowerpot attached to my head", it sure wasn't something you'd go around greeting people with unless you didn't mind staying in a cracker-house for a few years. Frankly, like San, Catherine was having a horribly difficult time absorbing all of this and keeping silent. So much of her just longed to scream out and yell, "hold it, wait a sec", just so she could sit and picture things more clearly and rationally in her mind. But yet, there was no time for such things. All Cathy could worry about was the fact that she would be getting very little to no sleep tonight. 

"I'm afraid so," Merle agreed, righting their doubts. "That's where Hitomi went five years ago, little did you people believe." 

Yukari ducked her down shamefully. She didn't know how this Merle or Shied seemed to know of her doubt or anyone else's towards Hitomi, but they seemed to understand that secluding feeling. It only made Yukari feel so much worse. Sure, maybe it would have been hard for anyone to actually believe Hitomi's story, but that thought wasn't very reassuring either. She couldn't deny the fact that she still had been a part of the doubting troubles weighed down on her best friend. 

"So everything actually happened?" her voice came out still partly unbelieving, in such silenced shock at the knowledge of such things. "You mean… everything she spoke of… dragons and everything…" 

"Yes," Shied nodded vigorously. "Everything you heard of occurred down to the very last detail. I can't really blame you for not trusting her however. I myself have lived here for a year now and I can see that your lifestyle is very much different from ours. To us, it is actually plausible that a girl from another world, or a girl from the 'Mystic Moon' would appear so suddenly, but for people like Earthlings the idea that other life exists to such a near proximity without their knowledge is just downright unbelievable." 

"Go figure," Merle rolled her eyes shrugging. "These Mystic Moon people think they know it all. And for that, Hitomi had to suffer." 

"Poor girl," Catherine thought aloud once more, still resting herself on the arm of San's chair. She tried to imagine for a second of what they spoke of, catching a glance of the night sky through the apartment window, wondering if this strange "Gaea" lay in that distant blanket of stars. 

"Indeed," Shied agreed quietly. "But it's not all sad endings. Just look at Hitomi now, I'm starting to think things worked out for the better." 

"What do you mean by that?" Merle inquired hurriedly, almost feeling insulted. 

"Shied, how could anything have worked out for the better? Hitomi ended up forgetting all about us all because nobody believed her. Not to mention all of those doctor appointments you were speaking of." 

"That's true, Merle," Shied agreed thoughtfully. "But still, who are we to judge what makes Hitomi happy? What makes you think she doesn't like her new life here? Really, this is her life Her visit to Gaea was only four months of the 15 years she had lived. Now, five years after that, just how much of Hitomi do you think we really knew?" 

Merle lowered her eyes, wishing that Shied didn't have to be so damn intelligent. It was actually more depressing than she had figured. If he had thought of things that way, he should have told her earlier. Then, Merle wouldn't have bothered lying to poor Van about that silly beach excuse to be here. If Shied were right about Hitomi being happier in this stupid world, then what would be the point in trying to convince her otherwise? 

"But what about Van?" Her yellow eyes directed upwards to Shied, who still was standing beside her. "Doesn't _his_ happiness count for anything?" 

"Well, that's kind of my point," Shied agreed half-heartedly. "The reason why such an honourable king as Van Fanel would become so depressed for so long was because he remembered. And also, on the same note, the reason why someone as Hitomi could live such a fulfilling life was because she had forgotten." 

"That shouldn't be right," Merle continued to protest, feeling an even darker depression with each of the young boy's passing words. "You can't just _forget_ about good things so you won't miss them. That's wrong, Shied. I know Van has been depressed and sad but still… deep down I know he doesn't 'hate' remembering her. It's those memories that make him happy, even if he feels a little lonely inside." 

"I know what you mean," Shied nodded and smiled, resting his hand on Merle's coat shoulder. "Who knows Van better than you do? But we really can't change or alter anything Hitomi or Van feel for each other, neither can we predict it." 

Merle returned Shied's smile, although feeling that happiness was vacant from herself. It truly was disappointing, but she knew that Shied also had a point. The mere fact that they really hadn't known Hitomi for as long as these other people did proved that there was a chance that her life did remain here after all. But still, deep and strong within her, Merle avidly hoped that somewhere in Hitomi's new life, there was still that small longing that only Van could fulfill. Somehow, Merle knew she was right. Hitomi had told it to her herself a long time ago. People share your feelings, and whether that Hitomi was conscious of it or not, she shared what Van felt for her. She just knew it. 

"That Van…" Yukari mentioned quietly gazing at her guests. "He… he still cares for Hitomi, doesn't he?" 

"Everyday of his life," Merle answered with utmost confidence. "I wouldn't doubt it for a second." 

A lull seemed to fill the room. Nobody knew what to reply in such odd circumstances. The three women did not exactly feel courageous enough to mention Hitomi's little engagement with Amano Nekuchi, neither were any of them that insensitive. However, the question on where Hitomi's present affection now lay, what with her strange leaving earlier this morning, was on the minds of many. 

"Merle, I think we should be going," Shied, being the first to break that awkward silence, gave a quick glance at his digital watch. "We said we'd only be a few minutes, so Mum must be waiting for us downstairs." 

"Right…" Merle sighed quietly, raising herself being so totally disappointed. Hitomi hadn't shown after all. It had been a one-time shot, and now apparently that one-time shot was a failure. The plan had been simple: come visit Hitomi when Van wasn't aware of it and just tell her what he was too afraid to say himself. But seeing as that wasn't happening, hopefully these three would successfully pass on their message. As long as Hitomi knew of the lengths Van would go just to be with her again, then maybe this whole voyage wouldn't be as pointless as Merle feared. 

"Hey, you guys can stay longer if you'd like," Yukari hurried after them, heading with them towards the front door of the apartment. "Well, I know this isn't my place, but we wouldn't mind. You can stay with us and wait until Hitomi returns; she probably won't be that much longer." 

"That's okay," Shied gave an appreciative smile. "I'm afraid we have a lot of work to do. We're leaving for home tomorrow." 

"Already?" Cathy joined in with the conversation, standing by San who had also decided to bid the strangest strangers farewell. "But you haven't seen Hitomi yet! Wait a minute, how did the three of you come to Earth anyway?" 

"Well, it's a very long story. Let's just say it took a lot of work to get here, and even more to return home. Please, just don't forget to tell Hitomi what you now know, so our trouble will be worth it." 

"No problem," the three agreed together. It was unanimous; no matter how strange both Merle and Shied appeared to them, the strangeness was what wooed them to believe it all and respond diligently. It may have been none of their business, but as long as Hitomi was involved, the bridesmaids felt they had their duties. 

"We'll tell her everything, don't worry," Catherine assured smiling, then quickly looked downwards as a massive fur ball tried to escape into the hallways through her feet. 

"Hey there Naria!" She couldn't help but scold, managing to catch the frisky feline by the collar before the chance of escape could escalate. "Don't go on out there!" 

Struggling with the meowing, nearly hissing, white Persian Cathy finally managed to hold her still and purring within her arms, only having to pay the price of being coated in a layer of shed, white fur. 

Merle reached out a paw to pet it carefully, amazed at the resemblance between this cat and Casey. As a matter of fact, she knew that all felines here shared a resemblance, and also seemed to fascinate her down to the last detail. But then again, there was something special about this one. 

"Thank you for your help," Shied nodded a last time and gave a wave to the three smiling women, making his way down the corridor. 

Merle, however, was slow to follow, still transfixed by the white cat in Catherine's arms. She raised her eyes to meet Cathy's, being about her height, with a questionable look. 

"Why did you name her Naria?" 

"Actually, she's Hitomi's cat," Catherine answered, scratching the overweight feline under the neck as the purr rumbled through the air. "I'm not sure really, Hitomi has had her for a long time." 

"She said it reminded her of something," Yukari quickly added in, leaning her weight against the doorframe almost sensing where Merle was going with this. "It was about a year after her first shrink session." 

"A year after she went to the doctor…" Merle couldn't help but muse aloud. There was no doubt; the name Naria was only too familiar to her. At first she had thought it was just coincidence that something here shared the same name as a relative of her kind back on Gaea, but maybe it was not so coincidental after all. 

"Merle, we gotta get going," Shied called from way down by the apartment elevators. 

"Coming!" Merle replied nearly child-like, lastly patting the fellow Naria on the head and smiling for the first time in a very long time in this exhausting day. Leaning over she gave Yukari a happy grin." 

"You know what, I don't think Hitomi forgot everything after all." 

***

"Van Fanel..." 

She allowed the name to whisper into the dimness after locking the room's door, crouching cautiously by his beside in order to prevent herself from being seen through the room's observation windows. She knew that was quite useless however, for anybody walking directly down the hallway would still be likely to spot her. Trying not to grow too discouraged, Motoko instead took the opportunity of the now semi-vacant hallways to hustle over by the room's observation blinds and quickly adjusted them shut. She may as well limit the chances of being caught with a patient before he was even able-bodied enough to be visited. It was still likely however that a passing nurse or doctor may find it odd to see the blinds closed as they were, but she'd rather take that chance than instead of merely being seen, plain as day. 

With fingers still clutching the blinds' handle, she couldn't help but blink vacantly for a few seconds staring at a smear in her glasses' right lens, feeling new and more sensible thoughts forming abundantly in the back of her mind. 

Really, just what was Kusanagi doing? She wasn't supposed to be in here! She had been specifically instructed to let this Van rest in solitude, as she knew he had to do after all the trauma the guy had so recently gone through. There wasn't much to find in here anyway; it wasn't like she could talk to him or clarify any of the misunderstandings in this mess. So, what was the point? Why was she risking her own credibility by breaking simple rules for non-existent purposes? 

A frown scribbled over her face as she blew away another short bang of black hair, feeling that all too familiar frustration come over her once again. She had been hoping desperately that by some miracle, he would have been awake. Yes, awake, like some sort of blessing would befall her and things would go the way she desired just for once. But no, of course not, chances were Van Fanel would need all the time possible to recuperate. And also, that Hitomi girl would probably not be saying anything sensible anytime soon. So honestly, where was Kusanagi Motoko to turn in such a case like this? Where were the leads? Where were the clues? Hell, where was the logic? 

"Who..." 

Suddenly, Motoko was instantly removed from her state of self-debate as a croaking voice ebbed into her mind. In seconds, her acute hearing instantly picked up the sound of the heart-rate monitor increasing in speed with the systematic noises it emitted. 

There was no doubt about it; as much as she hadn't really counted on it or thought it possible, he was awake after all. 

Turning quickly, Motoko dropped carefully by Van's side, studying him worriedly as his chest heaved deeply upwards and downwards, apparently still trying to fight off the wearing after-effects of the medication. He was doing almost scarily well however, his metabolism rates picking up quickly to an almost normal pace. His breathing was nearly regulated, the lively colour had resettled within his skin tone, and in the bleakness of the hospital lighting she could almost see a peek of burgundy eyes under his flustering eyelids. 

He was not only awake, but improving his conditions at a faster rate than she had ever encountered. 

"Who... are you?" Although his eyes weren't fully open, his mouth moved with the words, coarse voice whispering quietly into the surrounding air not even seeming to mind the state of his recovering injured leg. 

Kusanagi's deep, brown eyes blinked rapidly, alerting herself that she shouldn't just be sitting there amazed by the guy. This moment was critical. She couldn't lose this chance now. He was speaking to her, she could speak with him, and surely after what she was observing, she knew she definitely wanted to. 

"Van... can you hear me, Van?" She whispered the words, quietly though as clearly as possible, taking his weak hand within hers to physically alert him of his presence. "Van Fanel, I am Inspector Motoko Kusanagi. I need to speak wi--" 

"Where's... Hitomi?" Grunting from his efforts on trying to keep conversation, Van's left eye managed to fully open squinting with the right to try and catch a good glimpse of his fellow company. 

"She's at her home right now, I do believe..." Kusanagi answered softly almost taken aback, somewhat touched that those words would be his first inquiry. Out of all the things that had just happened to him, what with being transported to a hospital and being with a detective right out of the blue, it once again fascinated her that he still would wish to ask about that girl he cared for above everything else. 

"I see..." Van breathed slowly, eyes re-shutting as he relaxed his head back onto the comfort of the pillow, relieved to know things hadn't gone as badly as they had feared. This detective woman didn't seem as troublesome as he had thought. She had let Hitomi return home after all, despite everything that had happened. Van had been concerned for quite some time. He wasn't familiar with these lands, and moreover, he wasn't familiar with their policies. He knew all along that was what Hitomi had been worrying about as well: How to help Van with his injuries without jeopardizing his real identity or her knowledge of it. He, on the other hand, had been more worried of her. Van was not too anxious about dealing with these people; if Shied could manage his way around with lies and avoidance, then Van could do the same. However, it was Hitomi whom his concern lay with. The last thing Van wanted to do was to get her all raveled in negative attention and psychiatrist nonsense all over again. He would never want her life to become that miserable. As long as she was okay now, as long as no one bothered her, his anxiety could be relieved somewhat. Maybe now, Van should just stop resisting the medication and simply let the effects take its course... 

Kusanagi bit her lower lip concerned. His pulse rate was slowing to a normal pace once again, but she was still thinking of when he had awakened. The monitor sounds had definitely increased, and she could only worriedly wonder if the nurses at the observation desk had managed to notice. Surely, there wouldn't be much time now to get her business here up and over with. 

"Van," she took his hand tightly, hoping to keep him from drifting off into dreamland in his fatigue. "Would you please tell me what happened with you... what happened with you and Hitomi when that truck was about to hit. I need to know this Mr. Fanel, please tell me." 

She observed him carefully as the words left her, knowing she was close now to the truth, she just could taste it. As much as Kusanagi still recalled and wished to believe those heart-rending claims of Hitomi Kanzaki, she still had to look at this with a viewpoint of logic and basis. Hopefully, somehow, someway, that logic and analysis would only go to prove that Hitomi's explanation was correct. For some reason deep within her human longing, the last thing Kusanagi wanted to do was to bear any more burdens to these Van and Hitomi characters. Whoever they were and what their business was together she really did not know nor understand, but somehow she figured it couldn't end like this. She couldn't just see this through as "just another case". There were unexplainably stronger sentiments involved here than she knew of. She needed the truth. No matter how bizarre, like a real detective, she yearned for the right solution to large problems. But at the same time, with the human heart she had, she hoped only for the right solution that wouldn't just benefit her and this case, but also the two dramatic figures she was getting to know too well. 

Van didn't reply, not honestly wishing to, not wishing to recall the events of those moments. Instead, he lay gazing outwards through the hospital window. The night sky had already claimed the day, and re-shutting his eyes he wondered avidly to himself, 'Where is Hitomi now?' Surely, she was probably on her way home. But what was she feeling, thinking, longing, or wondering? Would she be happier now, or had their reuniting only made matters worse? Honestly, Van didn't feel that way. Even though his image looked of one of loneliness and depression, truly inside, he treasured every second of what just happened with a secretive bout of happiness to have seen her, to even have held her once more. That was the reason why he didn't long to think of it, because if he did, Van would obsess on returning to that moment. Even if his leg had been searing with pain, Van still wished to be in those few seconds where she had been snuggled in his embrace. He would give anything to return to the seconds her head lay upon his shoulder, or her voice filled the evening's still air, or her eyes blinked with moistened beauty, or when her words graced him with honest and unforgettable truth… 

_** "Van, I love you." **_

Van's eyes gently opened. His fingers rose to meet his lips. 

_He was still thinking about it. _

Even now, regardless of everything strange and foreign that was happening, somewhere deep within him his thoughts and being was still dwelling in that sweet moment not too long ago. That moment when he had heard the most fulfilling words that would ever come to be like music to his ears, or felt the most rewarding and unexplainably wonderful sensation of the gentle touch of a loved one's lips. He was still thinking about it so vividly, it was almost tearing at him inside. To see it replay, over and over in his mind to his heart's content was almost painstakingly real. Yet, in spite of the longing and demanding memories, he still craved to think of it. Although becoming too fond of the past was one thing he shouldn't do, Van's central thoughts refused to part with such extraordinary recollections. He just couldn't stop thinking about it, he just couldn't stop endlessly thinking about her, and Van highly doubted he ever would. 

Kusanagi drew her hand back, realizing that this Van character was fully awake and simply didn't long to answer her questions. He wasn't even staring at her, instead focusing his gaze onwards in a preoccupied manner, as if lying there he was too busy to even grant her a second of attention. Either that or he just desired to ignore her, which she couldn't blame him for doing. Why wouldn't there be a lot on his mind? It was obvious that in such scenarios one would probably need a few hours on their own to contemplate. Why had she even bothered coming in here anyway? If anything she had done lately was so raveled in uselessness, this had to be the most useless of them all. 

Raising herself slowly as the bed groaned under the weight exchange, Kusangi decided she might as well be off. He needed his space; besides, he actually looked kind of drained. It probably wasn't a good idea to be bothering a patient in such conditions; the doctors must have their reasons for scheduling visitor's hours when they do. Sighing, she knew this case would just have to extend a little longer than she desired. 

As her fingers met the doorknob, she paused quickly. 

She could hear it. Voices. 

"Oh shit," Kusanagi hurried over to the observation windows, allowing a finger to slip and part between two blinds. Nervous, glass protected eyes peeked out into the hallways, where she gasped to see someone walk by briskly on the other side. There seemed to be a flock of white coats out there, medical person after medical person surrounding the observation desk not a long way off. 

Snapping the blinds black shut, Kusanagi spun on her heel and spotted the odd monitor machines that surrounded the patient bed on the left and right sides. One of them had a strange, red, blinking light that she was confident was not there earlier on. Great, she had known it all along. The stupid thing had alerted the desk of Van awakening because of the increase in pulse rates or something or other. And now that the nurses were aware of it… that only meant… 

Her eyes befell the door again, the only entrance or exit of this room. There was absolutely no other escape. 

"Oh shit!" Kusanagi backed away hesitantly glaring as silhouette shadows cast upon the beige blinds on the opposite side of the window. She ducked quickly, hearing those voices become more articulate and frighteningly near. 

"Hey, who shut the blinds here? You know you're not supposed to shut 'em unless the patient is sensitive to light." 

"What are you talking about? Oh… I see. Wait a sec; I'm pretty sure those were raised the last time. What's going on, honestly it's been such a night…" 

"Oh shit! Shit! Shit!" Kusanagi's throat caught with her mild cursing, feeling her feet edge backwards hastily to avoid her shadow from being seen. She was going to get caught. There was no doubt about it now, not unless she was pathetic enough to crawl underneath the hospital bed (which she had momentarily considered) but she also knew that if she was discovered doing something as simple-minded and yet stupid as that, it would probably cost her her job, if this wouldn't already. Well, they probably wouldn't fire Kusanagi for sneaking into prohibited territory, but nonetheless that gave everyone at the department a right to look down on her, which they already kind of did. 

_"Oh shit…" _

The door handle began to rattle. The conversing on the other side began to grow louder. Kusanagi then remembered that she had locked the door upon entry. Was she ever thankful for that move now. There may be some hope in these nanoseconds she had left to think a little longer. 

"Hey, someone get those keys over here." 

"Ah shit…" 

Her hope dimmed as the rattle of keys filtered in from the other side. The handle began to sickly turn. Her mind went dead blank. 

It was all over now. 

Then unexpectedly, a hand swiftly took tight grasp of her wrist. Kusanagi Motoko felt herself stumbling backwards trying to catch footing as somebody dragged her to the room's single window to the far left. Wrestling with her new adversary, she could only manage to see wisps of deep black hair and cream coloured skin before the dominant Van Fanel leant over and said quietly yet forcefully into her ear: 

_"Hurry up, let's go. If you want to know what happened before that truck hit, why don't you experience it for yourself?"_

And those words were the only thoughts that the poor aloof and worn-out agent could come to think of before the hospital door finally burst open by a group of anxious and impatient nurses as she, along with her perpetrator, were flung outside into the open air, eleven stories high. 

***

No other day could possibly stretch as long as this one managed to. 

Hitomi sighed heavily, looking downwards at the key she held half protruding from the lock in the door of 5B. She just stared at it, refusing to neither open the door nor remove the key. She became rather hesitant, weighing out her rather dismal options. 

More than anything, Hitomi wanted to be home. She wanted to collapse into her bed and possibly never get up again. But at the same time, the last thing the poor, and distraught woman wanted to face was another rattling series of questions. There was no doubt that after all of these long hours, both Yukari and Catherine would have a load full of things to ask of her. Hitomi had only thought of it now, only reminded of her earthly friends at the sight of that key. Only now did she realize that she couldn't just lie to them and act as if nothing had happened. That would be so far from the truth, Hitomi should just die right then and there for having uttered such a horrible lie. In all honesty, she knew that she nearly died today. That was quite the event, not to mention all the other things that had so grossly added up by the dozens. Was she supposed to explain all of this as well? How could she? How could she tell her best friends what had happened to her, without losing every single meager droplet of credibility that she had? 

Slowly, Hitomi Kanzaki removed the key as quietly as possible. 

She sighed a second time, instead leaning her weight against the door, throwing her head back to stretch out her neck. 

She felt horrible. Her body complained against her in too many ways. She seemed to be jam packed with neck spasms, headaches, sore limbs and now filthy clothes. Her image alone was a dead give-away on the hectic she had gone through. Dirty and mangled, hair tossed and clothing disproportioned and torn; anyone could tell by her appearance that Hitomi had been having far from the usual day. The expression she wore was also rather gloomy, eyes sagging from exhaustion and face unfriendly in everything that she had to sort through. 

So basically, it was inevitable. She was going to tell them what happened, there wasn't really much of a choice. As she gazed inanely at the bright, hallway lights she knew that there was no avoiding the soon-to-come second interrogation. She could probably get through it all, but it was the way she would be able to handle them in her fatigued state was what worried her most. 

First, she would have to explain first about the near-to-collision. That would be the reason behind her distraught appearance. They would probably accept that, no biggie, with of course the surprised and worrisome reactions, the usual, "Are you sure you're okay?" or even "Should we call a doctor?" clichés. But how was she going to get around the rest of the events of the day? Was she supposed to just go out and say it? Was Hitomi was supposed to openly admit about how she was saved? What about the purpose of her journey, would she be honest and brave enough to tell her comrades just why she had been out in the first place? What would they think of her if they knew? What would they think of her if they knew whom had she had went to visit? What would they think if they knew that she had managed to see him, and had so awkwardly enjoyed those moments? What would they say if they knew just how deep in Hitomi's heart this whole situation dwelled inl? What if they knew just how much that someone meant to her? _What if they knew?_

Hitomi's eyes closed quickly. They were starting to abundantly water. 

She raised her hand uneasily, fingers meddling with her collarbone in search, finally discovering the sacred pendant within her blouse and grasping it tightly; eyes shut almost wishing to disappear, just to vanish without a trace. But still, deep in her mind Hitomi knew she wasn't thinking of disappearing. 

__

"God, I missed you Hitomi. I've missed you so much." 

Her eyes slowly opened; a tear slowly fell. 

She loosened her grip on the pendant, raising her fingers to graze over her lips. 

_She was still thinking of it_. She was still thinking of _him_. It still hadn't left, it still couldn't leave her, and she was wondering if it ever would. She doubted that she wanted it to. Even if she'd spend a minute each day crying and weeping for her sorry self, she'd still long to remember these things, no matter how sad they may be. Hitomi would always want to hear those words, imagine that kiss, think of that touch. These were things, beautiful things that she did not want to forget all over again no matter the consequences such painful yet adoring memories may have. 

Suddenly, the loud clanging of opening elevator doors down the hall woke her from her thoughts. Hastily, she dried her tears, not wishing to look more of a mess than she already did. 

"Hitomi…" a voice said full of clarity and without emotion. 

Quickly, wiping away the streams of stained mascara from her cheeks, Hitomi looked forwards to whom had stepped out of that elevator, far off in the distance, already knowing who he was by the simple sound of him uttering her name. 

She grimaced silenlty, her heart seemed to wrench even more, twisting and sick beyond help. She felt such an incredible guilt, yet also so very oppressed. This sure wasn't what she had expected, and of all things that could possibly occur, this really had to be at the utmost bottom of the bottom of the barrel. 

"Amano…" 

He didn't reply. He didn't even seem to acknowledge that she had called to him. Instead, straightfaced, he began walking forwards swiftly, step after step echoing in the otherwise vacant hallways. It was an intimidating image that only churned Hitomi's stomach even tighter. 

Suddenly, Amano Nekuchi paused himself directly in front of her, as he somberly stared downwards, eye to eye. 

"Hitomi…" He whispered quietly, not with the usual sweet, infantile voice, not with a friendly brush against her auburn hair, not even with the usual handsome smile he would use around her. Instead, Amano's image looked expressionless and monotone, impending that guilt towards Hitomi Kanzaki even more intensely. 

"Hitomi," he concluded strongly, words blunt and unforgiving. "We need to talk." 


	14. Paradise Broken Part II

**14.) Paradise Broken – Part Two**

            Confined. She felt confined and trapped, as if four strapping walls were instantly built around her, sealing her in beyond escape.  It didn't even seem plausible to Hitomi – the fact that those four walls were nothing more than the outer boundaries of her own home. Her own home... it sure didn't seem like it at the time. The air was uninspired, unadorned and almost even suffocating. Everything was uncomfortable – piercing, jarring, irritating. This was not the home Hitomi was familiar with; this was not the home she remembered leaving just earlier that morning. Now, the atmosphere of this once familiar place was thick with questions and doubts, lingering ponderings transforming her only sanctuary into a place she only wanted to leave all the more. There wasn't anywhere for Hitomi to go. There was no hiding place or refuge. She would have to face each passing challenge of this exhausting day, one after the other.

            The first challenge – eye contact. It was a thing she had been profusely avoiding, darting her jade spectacles in any other direction asides from his. Amano's glare was demanding, _intimidating. She couldn't bring herself to face it directly, as if doing so would release things, thoughts, of which she didn't long to share. Hitomi didn't know exactly when such secretive accumulations of hidden longings had begun to develop within her, but she knew it was something that Hitomi now desired to keep only for herself. She would have been willing to tell certain people: that detective, or maybe Catherine, maybe her newly arrived cousin San Askielowicz, and probably Yukari, but there was just no way she could gather enough courage within her to express such things to Amano Nekuchi. She was too afraid to admit what even she didn't understand. She was merely too afraid. _

            "Hitomi," he said her name, blank and expressionless. She didn't like when he spoke her name in such ways, basically because he never used such tone with her before. It wasn't comforting but commanding, and in this empty apartment of hers such a voice could ring out and echo and add fairly to her anxiety. She didn't like to hear this. If anything, Hitomi would much rather listen to the crackle of Catherine's cooking, the familiar roll of Yukari's laugh, or even the new sing-song voice of San, of whom she hadn't heard from in too long. Where had they all gone anyway? How could her close friends, her bridesmaids even, abandon her like this? It was all Yukari's fault. Hitomi had just been reacquainting with her dearest cousin San (just after entering the apartment and befalling the early-arrived surprise), when her best friend had decided to point out how quickly the day had slipped by them. And so, promising they would all gather in girlish giggling glee the very next day, Yukari had taken Amano's keys to drive herself and San home, with Catherine tagging along to bring the vehicle back to Amano safely. It almost even seemed planned, the whole ideal that Amano and Hitomi would be left in the apartment with no means of leaving. Sure, one might assume that the average two to be engaged are only most comfortable amongst each other, but they should have known Hitomi was far from average. They should have sensed Amano's serious persona. They shouldn't have left her all alone in a confrontation she couldn't weasel out of all by herself.

            "We're getting married in twenty-four days now," Amano smiled gently, waking Hitomi from her clouded thoughts. Her sight seemed to register again in her debating mind, and she noticed the handsome and almost warm expression return to her fiancé. She couldn't trust it really, thinking that it may just be a luring image to try and calm down her worries of things to come, but at least it was working. The way his brown bangs, almost a sepia colour, crowned his face lightly and the way his chiseled smile seemed to radiate with gentleness, brought an old and strange impression of comfort towards her. It reminded Hitomi of the way things used to be, when those looks used to dominate her previous love life and affairs. It reminded Hitomi of the way things were not long before, not long before her days took on a drastic turn for the worse, but also for the better.

            "Amazing, isn't it?" What seemed like minutes later, Hitomi finally replied realizing just how long it took for her to gather her thoughts and courage to speak.

            "Yeah," Amano nodded thoughtfully, taking her hands gently from across the dining table, separating her fingers with his, elbows resting on the grains of the red wood. "San seems like an incredible person. I'm glad to finally meet her. I'm not surprised a relative of someone like you would be just as wonderful."

            "Aw, Amano..." She blushed somewhat, almost forcing herself to. Sweet talk. It seemed queer. She hadn't heard such sugary, complimented words in a long time; at least not from Amano that is. Then again, in this past week, it wasn't like there had been much chance for opportunity. Days would sometimes come and go without so much of a word, much less something as seemingly ludicrous as "sweet talk". Both of them were just so caught up in just about everything, everything except for each other.

            "I've been thinking…" he stated, that dry tone beginning to return to him to Hitomi's dismay. His voice trailed after the words, bringing a tedious silence to the empty surroundings. The uneasiness of it all grew to the point where the ticking of the kitchen clock almost seemed deafening. Hitomi ached and longed for him to continue and complete his thought, to not prolong these minutes of pure uncertainty. The more time Hitomi spent with Amano after a day like today, the more likely he would be able to pick up on just what she didn't want him to know. She already could tell that Amano had an idea, vague it was and possibly easy to manipulate, but still it was an idea. That meant Amano doubted her. She was insulted by such a thought, but then again, did he not have a right? Didn't Amano have every side of justice to doubt her? Didn't she deserve the doubt?

            Then suddenly, Hitomi thought of _him_ again. 

She didn't how it happened, but somehow he slipped quickly into her thoughts without warning, allowing her heart to suddenly pick up passionately in pace. Her eyes were suddenly clouded by images of white – wings. He was leaving her. He was leaving her tomorrow. It was a sad reality that she knew and had been trying so much to avoid. Everything, the memories of this once-in-a-lifetime day, everything – she wanted to ignore it all just for now, just so she could play it normally with Amano and not arise any suspicions. However, it didn't seem Hitomi's mind was very effective with its task. Somehow, just that second, the questioning thoughts began to plague in confusing jumbles once more: where was he now? Was he safe? What had happened? Was he…

            "I think we need to talk, Hitomi." Amano said it again, those ugly words that are not anticipated within any relationship. Those words caused Hitomi's wandering thoughts to shut up, at least partially.

            "Alright." She shrugged. She smiled. Sometimes, Hitomi Kanzaki could only wonder where she found the energy to exert actions so positive after a day such as this. She brushed back an auburn bang, finding her thoughts to wander once more. She knew that once they were released, they were very difficult to contain a second time. She had been doing well, that is up until now. She had thought her day's worth of crying was over, but nonetheless her heart still hurt. It was painful, like it was some sort of outer physical force hurting her. But it wasn't. The pain was from within, and she couldn't ignore it, even in a time like this when it was simply best to ignore.

            "Do you know why I'm here today, Hitomi?" He was speaking still, Amano, still bringing her back from the thoughts she continued to wander off to. His expression was serious again, serious and uninviting. She didn't like it.

            "To... visit?" It was the only reply she could conjure up in time, feeling her hands clam with nervous sweat under the heat of Amano's. She swallowed; knowing her answer was no short of stupid. 

            "Visit?" His eyebrow jerked upwards, voice comprehending the illogicality of her response, trying to hide a discontented sigh. "Hitomi, it's almost eleven at night, you know I wouldn't be visiting at this hour. Moreover, I know that you should have been home a lot earlier, but you arrived here at the same time I did."

            She fidgeted uncomfortably, feeling her fingers coil and long to escape his grasp as her thoughts fought for an answer. She didn't like his hands on hers anymore. They felt just as confining as everything else did. They didn't love anymore, and they didn't feel loving. His hands, his warmth, his smile, his touch, just weren't the same. It didn't seem like anything could possibly _be_ the same. It was plain and simple and rung silently throughout her thoughts: Amano just wasn't similar or matching or alike. She knew it straightforward and she knew it well: _Amano just wasn't Van._

            "So just why are you here anyway?" She retorted quickly this time, almost lashing with her words, feeling an angered heat flame within her. If it was anything that Hitomi despised, it was being doubted. She didn't like being doubted, and she was absolutely starting to detest this prodding tone that Amano was using with her.  She also didn't like the way she kept "thinking." Hitomi was with _Amano_ now. She had to think of _Amano_ now. Her mind would have to stop these uncontrollable wanderings. She had to stay focused, even if her heart longed for otherwise. If she kept thinking of that someone else, there was no way Hitomi would survive this night with Amano questioning her every move and intuition.

            "Yukari called me just a bit earlier," He relieved Hitomi of some of her anxieties by casually releasing her hands to the draftiness of the open air. "She told me she was worried for you, and also about how you've been behaving lately."

            "Oh really," Hitomi sputtered, noticing that her voice was beginning to equally balance the monotone and nearly spiteful ways of Amano's. She had been right before. That smile was nothing but a fake, trying to get her to drop her guard. Amano's intentions here were far from loving. She hadn't expected and didn't like hearing Yukari's name mentioned in this mess, and she also didn't like the way Amano spoke of her "behaving." It made Hitomi sound like nothing more than a trained dog he could command to sit or stand whenever he pleased. She had no idea when such resentment had manifested within her, but along with her bouts of sadness, all of Hitomi's confused emotions were beginning to battle and fuel. 

            "Yes really," he replied to her with the same amount of sarcasm, drawing his hands back fully now with menacing brown eyes studying her over carefully as he leant against the back of the dining room chair. She noticed it now. She could see how Amano had that same look; he had the exact same look Yukari did just that morning. It was that sarcastic, high-cheekbone image of a kidding doubt that was miles from open-minded; one that Hitomi was adequately beginning to despise.

            "Hitomi, today's a Friday. You should have been at work."

            "I wasn't feeling well," she stated matter-of-factly, feeling her back press against the dining room chair as well, distancing herself. She felt like escaping now, she wanted to writhe out of this horrible situation and flee once more from these people. Her eyelashes fluttered to accentuate her words, to signal that she was not enjoying this little conversation to the least bit.

            "You weren't feeling well?" Amano repeated her, phrasing her words in a question form, leaning over to press his right hand against the sandy brown bangs of her forehead.

            Hitomi flinched for a second, feeling the hairs bristle on the back of her neck, almost having to hold herself back from violently slapping his hand away. 

            Then, he froze. He removed his hand, and stared at her with an image almost as hurt as it was highly questioning. His eyes looked forlorn, lost, confounded. His hands remained inert, unmoving, held in the air no longer touching Hitomi after feeling her immediate withdrawal. 

Amano took a deep breath. No one spoke for almost an unbearable minute.

"I'm sorry!" Finally, Hitomi gave in to the impeccable pressure, not longing to see his hurt image any more. Although, honestly she did feel upset with him, she realized now: what right did she have to be upset? Why should she be mad at Amano questioning her? He wasn't the one that disappeared for an entire day. He wasn't the one who was keeping things from her. He wasn't the one hiding a dozen secrets from everyone. _She was the one. _The only person she could be possibly mad at was none other than her own self.

"Why did you do that?" Amano asked the question austerely. There was no emotion to his voice, as he remained standing, looking down at her.

Hitomi, who felt now a hundred times smaller, ducked her head in confused shame, eyes hidden behind mahogany bangs falling near her ears. Why did she cringe like that? Was she angry? Was she upset with him? She really didn't know! She still detested the way he was speaking with her, so doubtful and cynical, but then again, he had every right to act that way. He had every right to question her because she couldn't deny the fact that a day such as this one only held about a million questions within it. Hitomi was the one who was screwing around with the regularity of life. She was the one who had decided to bring such a tumultuous twist to something that had once been so ordered, so already complete in its entirety.

"Why did you just react like that?" He posed the question a second time. "Hitomi, what is it? You don't want me touching you anymore, is that it?"

"What are you talking about…" She played stupid. It was the only thing Hitomi could do as her thoughts began to argue. There were so many arguments, loud and rampaging within her mind. Thousands of inclinations begged at her from every single direction. Some pleaded with her, demanded her to apologize to Amano, to submit to the supposed "perfection" of her previous and undisturbed life. That part of her wished Hitomi to run back to its reliability, to the normality of the upcoming wedding, to the factuality of Amano's presence. He was here. This was now. That was what her mind needed to accept. Hitomi had to think of her young and extended future that lay ahead, she knew she had to escape from all of the unexpected strangeness that had came so sweetly without warning. That was what her goal had been when she had left that morning: to achieve _closure_. She thought she would. Hitomi thought she would be able to confirm what she knew and go on with life, to go on with a beautiful and fulfilling life. It had seemed easy at the time, but now that easiness only enticed her laughter. Easy? This was far from such a thing. This was hell. Hitomi's mind was being constantly reminded about her earthly life, about what she needed to do in order to survive in today's society. She couldn't just speak of strange, implausible things and expect to stay at bay from the office of Dr. Nathaniel Teroka, whether she believed those things or not. If she went on living a tale of two lives, it was most likely she would simply repeat that cycle of beautiful psychiatry sessions and downright wonderful prescriptions for "crazy girl" disorders. Hitomi knew this with her mind, but she didn't even remotely think it with her heart. That was what was now impending that guilt once again. She couldn't even think of the wedding. She couldn't even look at Amano. She couldn't even touch Amano. She could do none of these things because her heart did not tell her to. It lay elsewhere, and very soon, it would tear the very aspect of Hitomi Kanzaki in a thousand pieces left to shatter.

            "Is there something wrong with my hands, Hitomi?" Amano woke her a second time. His voice was strong and challenging, displaying his palms and ten fingers, making them viewable against the table. 

            "Amano I—" A scramble for words – interrupted and unsuccessful.

            "So what is it Hitomi, huh?" He brought his weight back off the surface of the table, eyes flaming with his words. He looked angry to her, upset, but somewhere within, Amano also looked hurt. She knew it; she could still sense it. Even though he was mad at the moment, Amano was vulnerable. He didn't know what to do with Hitomi, as she didn't know what she would do with herself.

            "First you don't want me to put my hands on yours," he continued quietly now; voice lowering, hushed and almost even shimmering with each word of unexpected emotion. He stood near her, leaning his weight against the dining table, staring at the back of his hands, blinking softly.

            "Now you won't even let me touch you at all."

            His head titled in her direction, sepia bangs falling handsomely to his cheeks. His broken eyes lay upon her. They were quiet eyes. Familiar eyes. Sad eyes.

            Hitomi found that her breath was caught tightly. _She was facing him. Hitomi was not avoiding it this time – she wanted to see him. She wanted to meet his words with the same emphasis and strength, but just upon looking at him she could already feel herself growing not stronger, but weaker. _

            Such sadness. She hadn't seen it before, possibly because she had been doing everything but looking at him directly. But it had to be direct. It was strong, upsetting and sad. Hitomi didn't know how to relate to such a thing, trying but knowing she could not remember a time when Amano looked so inconsolable, so used, and so very abandoned. Why? Why did he feel this way? 

            Hitomi stood herself abruptly, the scraping echo of the chair legs screaming like a cannonball through the air in this awkward phase of silence.

            Deep, broken, brown eyes. Standing equally in front of her. Did she give them to him? Was it Hitomi who was at fault for such a strange look of utter loneliness? It was her fault, wasn't it? Who else could possibly be to blame? It was all her stupid fault! What in the hell was wrong with her? Amano didn't mean any harm. He never did mean any harm. He was full of good intentions, and she knew that. She had always known that. If Hitomi doubted Amano in any way, she would have never stayed so faithfully by him for all of these years as she did. When did things just so abruptly change in her life? When? When did she agonize over speaking to her fiancé, instead of rejoicing as she usually did? When did communicating with him become a chore instead of a longing? His eyes hadn't changed. Nothing about them changed. Nothing about _him changed. Hitomi had been complaining all of this time about how "nothing was the same," but perhaps, it was only Hitomi who "wasn't the same" after all. Even though she longed to deny it, Hitomi was aware of a horrible and unfamiliar truth that had erupted into the normality of their lives: Amano loved her dearly, but somehow, that once mutual love was now one-sided._

            She advanced slowly, arm extended. Her guilt had multiplied ten times fold, consuming her in a torturous fashion. His sadness, anger and resentment were still wrapped in confusion. At the same time, she was also wrapped in the very same way. Hitomi couldn't understand why she could no longer find herself thinking or feeling the same way as she did before. She had thought it would be easy, to bring back those enkindling affections that her and Amano shared, but it wasn't easy, like everything else, it was hell. She couldn't find them. Her mind and heart, body and soul searched frantically within every emotional aspect that dwelled in Hitomi Kanzaki, but nothing would ignite the flame that was once there. It had been extinguished, exhausted, replaced. Without even realizing it, Hitomi had willingly abandoned Amano to light a life of his own. With the upcoming wedding, with the dozens of invitations, with the months of planning, and the precious years of an endearing engagement, Hitomi had done the very one thing that would easily screw up the life of not only herself, but Amano also, and many others along the way: 

            Hitomi had fallen out of love.

            "Amano, please hold me." She asserted the words loudly and confidently into the coarse and thick air. There was no thinking involved, no planning, but only compassion. Hitomi found it much too difficult to sift through her own emotions, living in the fear that she would discover that same truth she had been so unwillingly hiding for the last near to six years. Despite that, despite the fact that she knew there was something deep and welled and developing within her, Hitomi would have to do her best to conceal it all a second time. It wasn't that she wanted to, but it was all because she had to. Hitomi had to do this; she had to will herself to put away those strong and wandering feelings. Amano needed her now; he needed her to be there just like the way she used to be. Amano needed Hitomi to be the way she was before everything changed. And she needed to be there for him; she knew she had to. It didn't matter where her heart was directed at the moment; she had to trust that his heart lay only within her hands. Hitomi knew hearts were tender and fragile, and she knew she couldn't drop his just because she no longer wished to carry it. That was selfish. They had been carrying each other through the past five wondrous years. It was a strong commitment that Hitomi could not break out of so easily, and she was starting to doubt whether she wanted to break away from it at all.

            Strong and caressing arms engulfed her, as Hitomi's thoughts abruptly silenced; she lay caught within Amano's embrace. It was soft, familiar, warm and alluring. Although she had been debating just how much she wanted to return to Amano's hold, all such arguments were hushed now. This action, quiet peace with bodies entwined, had gone without effort for the last five years. Five years going to six, that was a very long time and she had known Amano even longer than that. She knew that this, that now, was normal. This was normal, was it not?

            "Hitomi," Amano nudged her chin slightly with warm hands, looking down kindly at her. Although his gentle eyes were those of comfort, Hitomi could sense they were tainted. They were still deeply tainted with that devastated look of doubt and loneliness.

            He brushed a burnt sienna bang behind Hitomi's ear, fingers gracing over her skin. It was a common action between the two, yet seemingly rare these last few days. Still, to Hitomi, it felt kind – it felt familiar.

            "What's happened to the two of us?" Again, that sad voice. It wasn't angry anymore, just sad. How was Hitomi to respond?

            "Amano, what do you mean?" She gazed up at him questioning, pretending as if she didn't know what he spoke of. However, her glimmering green eyes failed to hide the truth that she just what he meant by his words.

            A breath left Amano softly, feeling weak in this ailing confrontation. His hands found Hitomi's, noticing that she no longer flinched or hesitated. Her touch was gentle and radiant as it was before. She was beginning to change. She was beginning to seem normal once again.

            Hitomi feverishly tucked her head beneath his chin, leaning in closer as his chocolate brown bangs tickled her forehead. She didn't want to hear his words; she didn't want to nor long to know Amano's explanation about the distancing in their relationship. Hitomi already knew. She knew well all of the factors that had been burying within the strength of their care for each other. Hitomi knew that those factors posed a large threat on her behalf, tempting her and drawing her away to a more enticing look on life. Hitomi longed to run away as well, she wanted nothing more than to look onto this new reality, to face a life she had hidden and only longed to explore. But now that she thought of it more thoroughly, more sensibly, Hitomi knew that was selfish. As much as there were factors that easily drew her away, all the same there were factors that brought her back to earthly realism. Even though she wanted to escape to the genuine world of fantasies that secretly raged within her, she couldn't deny that there was nothing wrong with the way her life was now. Maybe if her life were lonely or difficult, it would be easier to escape to that "winged" dream of happiness, but that wasn't the case. Hitomi's life now was just as promising, with a positive outlook on her wedded future and dozens by the dozens of kind and devoted friendships. Hitomi already had a good life. But then why did she feel so compelled to choose otherwise? Why?

            "What happened to you today Hitomi?"

            Amano was speaking, quietly, but Hitomi didn't even notice. Maybe it was because she so adversely wanted to avoid such a question, or maybe it was because her eyes were now shut. Hitomi only longed to close them, thinking that if she shut away the vision of the world and stayed only in Amano's embrace, just maybe, bit by bit, Hitomi could return to the way she once was just momentarily. 

            The world was shut out. It was just her caught within his close embrace. Hitomi's fogged heart had to come to a decision. She had to find the better of both worlds. She had to remember so many things. She had to look forward to even more things, even more beautiful things. She could only imagine the paradise that lay within her grasp. Wasn't it what Hitomi wanted?

            Yes, it had to be what she wanted:

            It would be quiet, a nice quiet neighbourhood. It would be the kind of pleasant neighbourhood you would see on post cards or friendly family shows. They would have a beautiful little house; two stories with pretty pink brick or maybe even off beige. They would also have a bungalow, a little cottage they would visit yearly out by Sunset Beach, four hours away. Their garden would be bursting with colour, what with Hitomi having quite the green thumb, and a handsome and probably expensive car would sit out in the driveway by their garage, what with Amano having quite the automotive taste. It would be such a perfect picture that they would be the talk of the neighbourhood, figuring Amano would know every single person in and around the block. Everyone would adore their close relationship to each other, with all the butterfly kisses in the morning as Hitomi saw Amano off to his profession as an independent doctor in his own little clinic. But even after that, Hitomi _Nekuchi_ would still have plenty to do, why, she would have to take care of the children! Oh, the vast amount of children! Well, maybe not _that_ many. Hitomi had a good feeling that one toddler was more than enough. Yes, that sounded more "paradise-y", seeing as toddlers were already a hassle for the young mother-to-be. Now, her little child would not have to be perfect, but she knew he would be adorable in every little way. Yes, their child would be a "he", a young little boy of whose name they would decide together. He would be adventurous and playful, bearing a striking resemblance to both of his parents. Yes, he would look much like his father but carry the traits and emerald eyes of his mother. His curiousity would sometimes get the better of him, but his eagerness would shine like the sun. That eagerness and curiousity would bring a bright child, one happy to learn and remember things as time went on. And with his young and newfound knowledge, that little boy and his mother would count down the seconds until his father would return from work, standing by the doorway as the shiny, black car pulled up the driveway while Hitomi pointed it out to the ecstatic young child through the window.

            "It's Daddy, it's Daddy!" He would cry excitedly, fumbling with the door handle, dazzling eyes bouncing and fluffy black hair falling to his ears. He would have his father's tie in one hand (of which he would strangely try and wear even though it dragged almost to his knees) and he would prod at the golden door handle with the other. It would be then that Hitomi would smile, slowly, and unsurely. But it would be then that Hitomi would pause. Then, she would slow herself considerably. Then, she would duck down on one knee, smiling lovingly at her son as she peered at him inquisitively.

It would be then when that once uniform perfection would instantly fall.

            Hitomi would brush back his hair, fingers running through a sea of berry black coating tan skin, while she would stare slowly at his earnest green eyes, which awaited his father. The earnest green eyes of his mother, the handsome looks of his father? 

            It would be then that Hitomi's breath would catch. It would be then that her thoughts would scream and quarrel. It would be then her mind would analyze, and her heart would frequently pound. Her eyes would then lift towards the door, her ears then picking up on the sound of a key being turned slowly through the lock. Her mind would then be crowded with thoughts of husbands and perfection, daddies and children. Then those thoughts would be silenced, as that door would be opened. It would be then that things would be opened. It would be then that her eyes would be opened and her mouth would utter no words in her own shocked surprise.

            It would be then that Van Fanel would walk through that door of perfection.

            "Nothing happened!" Suddenly, Hitomi heard her voice erupt into the strange silence; loud and astonishing even to her own self. She could feel her hands brushing him away, brushing Amano further from her, unconsciously answering his previously stated question that she didn't even remember hearing.

            Her heart was loud – it was pounding. What on earth had just happened?? She didn't even know! One second she was in Amano's arms, the next she was daydreaming of their blissful future… and then?? What had happened then? People can't just enter in your daydreams can they? No one else can alter a daydream except the person dreaming it up! Hitomi hadn't meant for that to happen, she hadn't planned it at all. It had been perfectly sequenced in her mind, just playfully watching the perfect little antics of her supposed future. Then how had _that _happened?? How had that slipped into the uniformed perfection, how did that always come back to her mind? It was incessant – uncontrollable and very convincing. She hadn't invited or enticed such thoughts to enter into her faultless fantasies, but now she was also aware that she was sickly beginning to prefer it. Hitomi liked the perfect Amano and her setting in the quiet perfect neighbourhood nice and fine and all, but what about that child… that little boy, her little boy? Hadn't he been quite the spectacle too? Floppy black hair and her own emerald eyes, yes, she had liked him. Hitomi had liked everything about her imaginative son; his inept yet adorable curiosity had won over her heart easily. Whether he is just a figment of her thoughts or not, she knew there was something special about thinking of the boy the way she did. He was not uniform with everything else in that little textbook world. It was like he was the imperfection in a perfect balance, or maybe even the perfection in an imperfect balance. Whatever it was, he was different and Hitomi liked that difference. _She liked it._ That liking was not just within the boy, but instead what that boy symbolized to her – his father.

            "Nothing happened?" Suddenly, Amano's dry voice scaled right into her thoughts, waking her again from another wandering. It was loud and scarily demanding, like a door being slammed in her face. It was as everything had changed or altered or warped from that warm embrace just seconds before, now back into that intimidating gloom she had thought she had escaped. 

            They were a foot apart now, staring each other eye to eye. Wherever that warm embrace had gone she didn't know, she didn't even remember why she even bothered touching him at all. She was still upset with him, wasn't she? Or wasn't he upset with her? It was foolish of Hitomi to think things could just return to normal whenever life pleased. 

            "What's so surprising about that?" She challenged slowly, trying to keep her voice from growing too irrational. She didn't want to make it seem obvious that her mind was fully awake with rampaging thoughts a second time. Somehow, Amano had managed to successfully calm her before, with his sad eyes that wore at the surface of her heart. But she couldn't ignore what was welled even deeper than Amano's hurtful look. Eventually, no matter how hard she tried; it would keep coming back to her faster than Hitomi could run. _The cycle was repeating._ Everything was happening just like before only this time Hitomi had to face her Earthly friends as well as her outer fantasies. And this time, Hitomi knew what they would do to her. She knew the longer time went on, the more suspicious Amano and company would get. Before you know it Hitomi would be back in Dr. Teroka's clinic as "just another regular". But ha, she wished them luck and plenty of it; these skeptical earthlings. Hitomi wasn't going to forget so easily this time, no, she didn't plan to forget at all even though she had been asked to. Even when she tried just like before with her daydream of paradise, things will always be the way her heart wants them to be. It was something Hitomi couldn't avoid.

            "You're lying to me Hitomi," Amano interrupted her analyzing, voice as cold as shaved ice. His eyes narrowed considerably with his temper wearing thin. "And I was right, you don't want me to touch you at all, do you?"

            Hitomi was just about to jar in and ask what he meant by that, but then she noticed that each passing second she was moving inch by inch further away from Amano. It had been unconscious movement, something she wasn't aware she was doing but just sort of doing for the sake of it. She wanted to distance herself from him; Hitomi wanted to get as far away as possible, even if that meant being worlds away. 

            "What makes you think I'm lying?" There was demand in her voice, demand that was now beginning to override in panic. She knew that she had missed something along the way, some sort of important and essential detail, and she also knew that that detail was what Amano would now use against her. 

            "Why are you doing this Hitomi?" He asked plainly, as if he was so righteous and educated, and Hitomi was the dunce lacking knowledge of anything. She felt insulted by him, but yet also she was rather wary. _Amano knew something. _She could just sense it. He knew something and that was the reason why he knew she was lying to him.

            "I don't understand you," she said with clarity, as if trying to make herself look any better. Hitomi knew she was just going around in pointless circles, but Hitomi didn't care about that. She wouldn't care if this evening went on in spiraling coils for that matter, as long as they wouldn't have to discuss what Hitomi didn't have the nerve to discuss. 

            "It's eleven at night and you've been out since ten this morning," Amano declared matter-of-factly, stating his first point of proof. "Explain this to me Hitomi, especially since you didn't go to work."

            "How is this your business?" Hitomi growled her reply. Amano was just so superficial she was beginning to hate him for it. One second he would look at her with those damn puppy eyes, enthralling her to run back to him and fall into his caress, and the next he would be just as insensitive as he was before. Two-faced – that's what he was. Hitomi just wanted to be left alone. This day was enough to handle, she just wanted it all to be over.

            "It really isn't my business," Amano nodded rationally, agreeing with her in that cooperative yet shallow tone that indicated there was more to his words than just their pleasant ring."It wasn't my business Hitomi, until you got me involved."

            An eyebrow raised and her heart still pounded, hands clammy with sweat. This must have been the "detail". This must have been what she had so carelessly looked over. 

            "How on earth did I get _you _involved Amano?"

            He stared at her blankly as if she were stupid. She sure felt like it at the moment, like she had skipped over something so bluntly obvious and now even with all of the hints he was dropping, she still couldn't figure it out.  

            Amano sighed – loudly. He looked at her, expressionless.

            "Hitomi how is it," he began, emphasizing each syllable as if she would be too slow-witted to understand him. "How is it that an emergency, that you being in the Ramada and that your 'friend' being in an accident and 'bleeding to death' could be considered as 'nothing happening' today?!?"

            She froze, dead still. It was like the blood drained from her face, to a point where she could almost feel her complexion whitening in realizing shock. _He knew. _He knew MUCH more than she would have ever predicted and it sickened and wrenched at her stomach at the thought of her pure negligence. How could she have been so blind? How could she have thought that she could easily weasel her way around Amano as if nothing had happened? He wasn't stupid! She was! What an idiot Hitomi had been. She should have known better; she shouldn't have forgotten about that damned phone call. Of course, that was how he knew of her actions today. He must have just received that stupid panicked message she had left hours earlier. Little did she know just how much information she had given him then. Now Amano knew all he needed to know about Hitomi. He _knew _she was purposely lying to him just seconds before and he knew that she was hiding something big. Hell, Hitomi knew she was hiding something big. She figured if she went on with daily life and utilized the best of her acting skills, then it would have been very possible that she wouldn't have to retell her story of the truck encounter, or the detectives, or the two hour walk, the taxi drive home… or those incessant thoughts buried at the furthest yet most powerful reach of her mind. Hitomi had hoped in all her heart out of all people in the world, Amano wouldn't _ever _have to know about Van, much the less what Hitomi thought of Van, what Hitomi felt for Van. She would have been willing to share the strange near-death experience and everything else about her day if she had to, but Van was a treasured secret she wanted _only _for herself. She couldn't tell another soul about what had occurred, even if she wanted to! If those events were brought in the open, those sweet, enkindling events, Hitomi would be… well… exposed. _Ruined._ She knew now that she was hiding a lot more than she could contain. Amano had leeway to the very things she was trying to conceal. What she hoped was ending was actually only beginning.

            Her hands sensed a dining chair behind her. Hitomi's feet were still staggering backwards, still longing to escape but knowing such hasty measures would only bring about a worse outcome, and she didn't want any of this getting any worse than it already was.  Besides, it's not like Hitomi had anywhere to escape to. This _was _her home! This place was her only means of escape from her collection of strange problems. If there were problems here, then Hitomi had nowhere else to go.

            "You wouldn't understand Amano," a desperate fumble for words escaped her mouth, biding for an excuse to her actions. "Amano you just –"

_            "Why are you lying to me? _What are you keeping from me, Hitomi?"His voice was so extremely loud, so threateningly loud that it alone sped up Hitomi's heart rate all by itself. Hitomi's words towards Amano were like hitting him with a dull object – it annoyed but made little to no effect. On the contrary, his demands were like a double-edged knife, piercing further and further into her until she would simply have to break down and confess. 

            But she couldn't do that. She just couldn't!

            "I told you, you won't understand!"

            "And why is that?" Amano was still hostile, aggressive, attacking her with that knife like a homicidal maniac. He wasn't backing down on this and it didn't look like he would allow Hitomi to succeed in her pitiful defense. 

            She stammered for words, "You can never understand. No one can."

            "You're telling me that your own fiancé, your own future husband, _can't _understand you?"

            She choked knowing she was trapped. Her eyes darted in every direction except for his, feeling the heat of the room was intensifying. The ticking of that damned kitchen clock was silenced now, untimely of course, so it made the air even more dull and nerve-racking. Why, even her cat just stared at them from atop the dining table, whiskers frisked beautifully, as if she didn't have a care in the world, and all the same she probably didn't. Damn that Naria.

            Naria…

            Hitomi's breath slowed. The name was achingly familiar, and not in reference to her overweight Persian cat. Yes, that was it! Hitomi had been kidnapped by a Naria, another feline, long ago in that strange demented world of her abandoned memories. It hadn't even occurred to her before, and it didn't even register in her mind when she had willingly named her own cat Naria back in the tenth grade. That world was still a part of her. Amano could never understand this. No one could.

            Something singed her neck. 

            She looked downwards swatting at the pain, but then it disappeared as quickly as it had come. She glared at the bare of her neck just managing to catch a fleeting glimpse of ruby pink – her pendant. It lay hidden behind her blouse collar, but she could easily notice the way it radiantly glowed. It was calling to her. He was calling to her. He was calling to her. He needed her.

            _"Van,"_ she thought painfully grasping that pendant, _"only you understand me."_

            "So how is your friend?" Amano brought back her attention stepping a little bit closer. _"Did he die?"_

            "_NO!_" Hitomi retorted back angrily, losing grip on her pendant and instead clutching her fists into tight balls just ogling Amano in disbelief. What in the hell was with that question?! How damn insensitive! The jerk!

            "I thought that would get your attention," he stated almost even amused to prove his point. "So that's why you're so distracted. You're worrying about him."

            "Who?!" Hitomi challenged, weakly, but still she challenged. She couldn't drop her guard; although she felt faltered with weakness she couldn't let him sense that! He was already toying with her rather skillfully, and it would only be a matter of time before his verbal knife would cut off her connection to any other liable excuse. 

            "You know who," Amano crossed his arms, miffed in reply. "Hitomi, you've only been dawdling all of this time. I know you Hitomi, much more than you'd think. I know you're thinking about someone else right now, and I know you can't get your mind off him. I don't need tarot cards or whatever to tell that you don't _want_ to get your mind off him. Hitomi, you _like _thinking about him."

            "Amano, I don't know what in the hell you're—"

            "Don't lie to me again Hitomi."

            "Well, shit Amano, it's not my fault! You're making this so fricking difficult—"

            "You're making it difficult for yourself. You could always just tell me the truth and this will all be over."

            Hitomi paused. She didn't have a heated reply to any of Amano's carefully crafted words. It made her wonder why on earth he went into medicine instead of law. He was just good at this kind of stuff, and Hitomi knew battling him with her dull object was pure suicide in itself. He was right. Amano knew what Hitomi was like and all the same she knew what Amano was like. She knew he wasn't going to give up until he was proved correct.

            _"This will all be over."_

He was right about that too. If Hitomi just came out with it, then possibly that would be the end of the day right there. No more troubles. She could just go to bed without having a dozen concocted lies hanging over her head. It could all be over whenever she wanted.

            "Hitomi," Amano was still so persistent, somehow making his way back directly in front of her without her even noticing. His heavy-laden hands lay upon her shoulders, but not in a way of comfort, but in a way of demanding interrogation. 

            "Hitomi Kanzaki, _who do you love?"_ – an unexpected statement.

            "What? What kind of question is that?" – an expected response, taken entirely off guard.

            "It's a question. Answer it." – a demand.

            "I don't know! You of course, what in the hell is the meaning of this?" – frantic. 

            "Me huh?" Amano cocked his head sideways. "Me and who else?"

            "What more do you want?" Hitomi sniped the words. "You, Amano, YOU. All right? Are you happy now?"

            "No," he answered her bluntly, almost in a comedic fashion although his voice was dry and horribly threatening – far from funny. "As a matter of fact I'm not. You know what I'm getting at Hitomi, but perhaps I should rephrase in a way you won't squiggle out of. Hitomi, I don't want you to lie to me."

            "Amano I—" – interrupted.

            "It hurts me when you lie to me like that." – quiet, melancholic.

            It was that damned sad face again complete with sad eyes and sad voice, the pitiful works. The worst part about it was that Hitomi had a hard time distinguishing just how genuine Amano's image was. But nevertheless, it still affected her; it still weakened her to understand his words. She was denying it so profusely, so heatedly, but in the end she knew that Amano was more right than Hitomi was. She knew she couldn't lie any longer, she knew she didn't want to lie anymore.

            "Hitomi," he whispered her name slightly thumbing her chin gently, once again back to that quiet state of being. "I love you, do you know that?"

            "Yes," she nodded slowly, not admitting that she wished she didn't know that. If she didn't, Hitomi wouldn't feel as guilty as she was feeling now.

            Amano hesitated for a second, as if waiting for a response other than her agreement. She looked at him, studied him, feeling dubious, knowing once again, she had managed to overlook the obvious. Just what it was this time was what concerned her most.

            "Do you love me?" He asked plainly. 'I love you too.' Well, of course that was what Hitomi had forgotten to reply! She felt like she was becoming stupider; she was neglecting all things that were important as her mind continued to wander further away from whatever was happening. She needed to focus. She needed to stay on top of the game.

            "Of course I do, Amano."

            "Do you love anyone else?"

            "Plenty of people, Amano."

            He smiled a smile of impatience at her weaseling around his questions,  "I meant romantically, Hitomi. 

            She was about to reply, words hot on the tip of her tongue gracing the roof of her mouth ready to form that "n" sound, ready to reply, "No, of course not, Amano," in her systematic way of answering things. But the words did not escape. They couldn't escape. Lies could not escape the boundaries of her mouth, or travel the sounds of her vocal cords. Hitomi said she wouldn't lie anymore, she told herself that! She didn't want to mess around with the truth, and make matters just as bad as they had been when Amano first found out about her "nothing happened" fib. She couldn't lie, and Amano knew this, which is why he had asked the question as directly as he did.

            His heavy hands grew even more immense in weight upon her shoulders, like they were shoving her into the ground feet first. He was close enough to her that she could feel his warm breath blowing on her bangs, warm hands almost suffocating her from any space at all. He was crowding her, and she didn't like it. She didn't like this tension, this silence, this pressure to do something, to resolve this mess, when she didn't even know how. She didn't know what to say! She didn't have anything to say but the truth, and that would be the definite last thing that would utter out of her mouth. She would much rather lie than tell the truth at this point, and to maker matters worse, she would much rather say nothing than lie. And so, Hitomi was left standing and facing her thwarting fiancé, now looking not only stupid, but also mute. She was a lying, cheating, slow-witted and defenseless person who actually had the nerve to be angry with Amano. She began to wonder about that: Why in the hell was _she _mad at him? Sure, sure, so he was making her uncomfortable and he was being sort of insensitive, but if Amano knew ALL of the Van-oriented details that ran through Hitomi's mind with each passing second, he would not only be upset with her, but furious. He was picking up on a lot, but Hitomi was hiding so much more. What she hid was what Amano wanted to know, and what she planned to never share no matter what.

            "Hitomi!" His voice was highly commanding now, it almost seemed to deflect off the walls and echo into her ears. His looming image stood close to hers, shadow casting onto her, it made it seem like Amano filled the entire room. 

            "There's someone else???" His eyes were on fire, his words equal to that flame. "Is that it Hitomi? There is someone else, isn't there??!"

            Her breath was truly caught now, that overpowering invisible heat was like a stench crowding her thoughts. _He wanted a reply. _She could tell by the intensity of his expression that Hitomi could not play around with his words, she couldn't avoid the purely inevitable. Amano had been planning this ever since he had set foot in her apartment, no, even before that, he had been probably concocting it for quite a time today. Because he knew her so well, he also was fully aware of her weaknesses, of her usually short-term memory. Amano now had the advantage. In these last few minutes he had managed to successfully prove that Hitomi was a liar, falsifying the truth to her own future husband as he said himself. He also got her to admit that she had been with someone else today, that something eventful had happened of which she did not want to share. He also got her to say that she loved Amano, of which the words came out of her mouth from force of habit. Hitomi had been questioning just how genuine and real Amano's gestures were, when all of this time, all of the emotions she had been sending out were not even close to real! She was the only non-genuine thing about this whole, confusing relationship! She was the problem, and she didn't know what to do about that. She just didn't know what to do.

            **"Hitomi." **His voice was so dark; it was frightening and even more than intimidating. It commanded attention and power and Hitomi's mind could wander no further. "Look at me."

            Shit, she couldn't avoid him now. Gosh, that stupid Amano was so smart. He knew that she wouldn't have the daring heart to utter a word of a lie when staring at him eye-to-eye. Hitomi had a problem with lying in any form whatsoever, but when Amano was standing there, looking at her, she was totally and entirely helpless. Her eyes were the windows to her soul, and Amano had looked through that glass enough times to know the truth of her words even before she spoke them. There was no escape. She didn't know what to do. Hitomi was trapped, cornered. The end was now.

            Brown eyes studied her, focused, dismayed, angry and lonesome brown eyes. His hands were now a fair hundred pounds each, weighing down on her as if a flock of a thousand moths were eating away at her dignity. Those eyes, Amano's eyes, they wanted the truth. She could see right down to Amano's soul, Amano's thoughts. He wanted the truth; he wanted to know. But he wouldn't he be able to handle it, Hitomi knew that. She couldn't even handle the complication of her own situation, how much less would somebody as close-minded as Amano grasp the concept of what no one understood?

            "Hitomi," He was still barging onwards though, still blindly charging forward into the unknown. His next few words were at the same time expected of him, yet unexpected for Hitomi to hear. She would have never thought that Amano would have already devised the no more than perfect way to state just what everybody wanted to know, including herself:

**            "Hitomi, do you love Van Fanel?" **

His words were so short, so soft, so simple yet so damn complex. She had not one idea where on earth Amano had already heard _his_ full name, nor did she have the nerve to question it. He had asked her something she could not answer; for Hitomi could not lie and she'd much rather lie than speak the truth, so basically Hitomi could not say a syllable of any word. Instead, she just stood still looking mute and slow and unwilling, feeling her breath was either hastily rapid or worryingly slow. Also, she could feel herself moving until she realized she was trembling. It was a mild little vibrancy but she _was _trembling, from what she didn't know. It could have been the pressure of the situation, Amano's unending glare or even the weight of his heavy hands, those horrible heavy hands. It would take a few seconds before Hitomi would notice that she was not trembling at all, but instead, Amano was mildly shaking her with those burdening hands, back and forth as if to try and knock some sense into the woman, looking for that response he had hunted for in all this time.

            "HITOMI!" He called to her, practically shouting in her ears.

            She didn't reply. She couldn't reply. Hitomi had no answer for his inquiry; the only words she could say would only make it much worse. She could only fall submissively to his non-gentle rocking, feeling his hands burning through her skin like iron plates.

            "So is this it Hitomi? You love this Van, don't you?" His fingers dug into her shoulders, almost painfully, and the spit of his words practically lashed onto her face. He was disgusted with her and her inexcusable silence.

            She looked back at him, as she had never blinked yet. She felt afraid, focused, angry, upset and alone. They shared the same emotions, but Hitomi couldn't see that common advantage. She only saw differences. She could only see vast differences between them, differences she did not like.  Those hands were pressing and demanding, and they were beginning to hurt her. Not emotionally or mentally or verbally, but physically. They were actually starting to hurt her. 

            Hitomi's eyes blinked once. He wanted a reply; he wanted her to say something. The silence was tedious. Something had to be said. 

            "Amano," she hushed quietly, guiltily, and remorsefully. "Don't touch me."


	15. Disquieting Revelations

**Chapter 15: Revelations**

The sleek gold wasn't even close to faded, still that gorgeous burnt yellow surrounding the continuous loop. There were no gems encrusted, but that didn't take away from its truly inspiring image seeing as, after all, it was a male's ring and such pretty things as diamonds or sapphires weren't entirely necessary if not strange altogether. Because of that, the handsome piece of jewellery was much too large to fit on any one of Catherine's fingers, and it wasn't like she would have been disrespectful enough to wear it anyway. She didn't even feel that it was morally right to even touch it, and if not for the fact that the kitchen counter needed a bad cleaning, she would have simply left it in its place. The ring, all alone in its miniature simplicity, was a very powerful symbol of a path she could not tread. Plainly saying, it wasn't her business and Catherine hadn't been around long enough to demand it to become her business, as much as she wanted it to be.

Suddenly, the sound of the opening bedroom door alerted her panic, forcing Catherine Corain to quickly yet gently drop the ring onto the surface of the dining room table, trying to claim for her innocence as if she hadn't been doing anything. To be honest, she really hadn't been doing anything but transferring the item to a safer place, but even then she didn't want to explain all that to her traumatized roommate. It was an uncomplicated thought that still purely frightened Catherine – the thought of facing Hitomi Kanzaki.

But to Catherine's mortified relief, Hitomi was actually not the one to walk through the bedroom door at all. Instead, it was Yukari Uchida filled with a look of disdain disappointment, dark rings encircling her eyes to prove just how tired she was. Cathy didn't blame her to the least bit, feeling she had to constantly stifle off a yawn every other minute in this strenuous early time of morning. Already complete with slick, yellow gloves and frilly apron made from her mother, Cathy had about a three-hour head start on her annual Saturday weekend cleanings. It really wasn't that early, only about eight or so fresh in the morning, but to a pair of university seniors edging onto finals, sleeping in on a Saturday was an absolute must, if not a requirement for one's health and sanity. But Catherine couldn't help but notice how easily distracted she was getting from her dusting and mopping (keeping in mind that Cathy at her work was rather difficult to distract) as her eyes had kept peeled to that bedroom door. Now, as agonizing minutes later, Cathy couldn't help but share Yukari's miserable disappointment. This morning was truly going nowhere.

Yukari looked aimlessly at Cathy, the tray with the hot bowl of oatmeal and fresh glass of orange juice still sitting untouched where it was within her arms. She gave Catherine a hopeless dimmed glance complete with an exhausted sigh.

"She's not hungry."

"Poor girl," Catherine matched that sigh and retrieved the tray from Yukari, placing it gently against the dining table, covering the uneaten food with a plastic lid, while shooing the curious white Naria away. She managed to catch a glimpse of the ring once again, thinking to herself just how long Yukari had been inside that room with Hitomi. It probably hadn't been more than five minutes.

"Did you get to tell her about how those two kids came by yesterday?"

Yukari nodded her head slightly, pulling back a dining chair and collapsing her weight into it. She couldn't get Hitomi's distraught image out of her mind, and all of these happenings combined made her feel really and truly helpless. Yukari just didn't know what to do. There were so many things to do, but she couldn't find the heart or nerve in her to confront Hitomi on any of these things.

"It was that bad, huh?" Catherine plodded into her thoughts, removing her waxy yellow gloves and sitting herself adjacent to Yukari. Yukari looked purely exhausted, head in hands with fingers seaming through her layered hair every once and a while. The thing was, Catherine knew that all of that exhaustion was not from physical activity at all, but the tense emotional activity of everything that was occurring and had occurred.

"Yeah," Yukari lifted her chin to stare at Catherine with a grimacing look. "Man, Cath, what are we to do? She's not gonna get out a bed, hell, the girl won't even eat and I ain't gonna barge right in there and force her to either."

Catherine nodded sadly; disappointed to know Hitomi was as much of a mess as she had feared. It was such a complicated problem that even in this past hour, neither Catherine nor Yukari could devise a full-proof way to successfully confront it. There were so many questions that they just shouldn't ask, and there were so many problems that they just couldn't solve. Yet, if these two -- the few that weren't plagued by emotional distress -- could not resolve this climatic situation, then honestly, who could? Just what could they do to fix something that was not their business, yet all the same a major factor in their lives and daily activities? Thus, the girls would have to remain indecisive for just a little longer.

"I'm sorry Catherine," Yukari sighed miserably, glancing every so often in Hitomi's bedroom door's direction, hoping for a sign of life to erupt from it. "I really suck at this kind of stuff. I didn't even get the guts to work up enough courage to ask her about last night. I couldn't do it. You have to see her, Cathy, it's unbelievable."

Cathy let out a breath. She had caught a momentary glimpse of Hitomi just last night, and if that's how upset the girl was then, then she just didn't want to know how Hitomi looked now.

"Maybe you should try," Yukari looked to Catherine with hopeful eyes. "I just don't know what to say. Well, I do know what to say, but I just can't say it, you know?"

"I know what you mean," Catherine agreed, fingering the ring once again as she saw it still lying by her hands. "But I don't know how much help I can be. I don't want to really say anything, because I haven't known her too long."

"Don't worry about that," Yukari forced a smile past her dismay. "Hitomi gets along with you just fine, better than so much other people actually. I don't think she'll get upset at either of us, but you're right, she's still in a very unapproachable state right now."

"Just what did she say to you?" 

"Oh…" Yukari bit her lip wishing she didn't have to recall Hitomi's broken image. Moreover, she didn't like recalling Hitomi's broken voice trying to hide the wailing tears she had been shedding hour after hour. Even as concealed as the young woman was in that room, her vibes of utter sadness were still plainly easy to detect.

"She didn't say much at all. Hitomi was tucked up to her chin in covers and facing the wall, so I couldn't see her either. I just asked if she was all right, she said yes, and then I told her about the boy and that girl that visited yesterday. She didn't respond so I just said you had breakfast made. She mumbled something or other that she wasn't hungry and I could only stand to tell her we'd be there for her if she needs us, before getting out of that room."

Yukari smiled a bit, a smile that was not a sign of gladness, but a symbol of musing on just how desolately impossible this situation was, "You won't believe how depressive it is in there, Cathy. I can't go in there again. I just had to get out."

"Don't blame yourself, I know it's a lot to absorb," Cathy tried to share a supportive smile; appreciative that at least Yukari had had enough courage to try and approach their unstable friend. Although Catherine was usually labeled as the brave one in tense situations, emotional situations were another story she did not like to read. She could barely even sleep last night, the hours easily slipping her by as she lay just constantly worrying for the sake of her new companions. The tone of Amano and Hitomi's last heated words to each other rang disturbingly through her mind and thoughts and memories. Catherine had been the only one who witnessed it, seeing as Yukari and San had already been dropped off home to the appropriate places, and of course she had been returning after parking Amano's vehicle back in the guest lot. It had been then that she approached the door of 5B, hearing unsettling and thrashing words from within her own home, knowing things had not gone well at all in her absence. She couldn't explain the reasoning or the cause, but all Cathy knew was the second she got that door open, Amano had taken his car keys off her and disappeared instantly, leaving Hitomi in the most weeping, pitiful state she has ever been in. It was an unimaginable situation, pure discomfort and lack of knowledge on just about everything. Hitomi's distraught image was just so damn torn, that even the usual empathetic Catherine could not handle sharing such emotions. Thus, the two had gone to bed without many words, leaving the night and the following day to be as troubling as ever can be.

"Hah, what are we gonna do now..." Yukari shook her head, wondering still when she would awake from this nightmare. She was thankful however that she wasn't as worse off as Catherine. Yukari was often miserable at the fact that her parents had purchased her that condominium apartment way out near Tsutomu Lake, since her and Hitomi had been planning to be roommates since they were little high school fledglings, and Hitomi just couldn't afford splitting the cost of the condo. However, in the case of last night, Yukari being independently stuck in her own home was a fortunate case, seeing as she could only sympathize for Cathy who had to struggle with this dilemma straight through the night hours. Yukari had only been informed of the problem early this morning, when Cathy's urgent phone call had awakened her and after hearing of the situation, she had climbed aboard the first train headed to Greenwood station. Even though Yukari had known both Amano and Hitomi for what seemed like forever to her, something of this unpredicted and climatic measure would be much too much for her to bear. This had never happened before between any of them, ever! Sure, there were squirmishes such as the one between her and Hitomi a few years back, but each of those things were usually based on immature feelings fueled by anger with a lifespan no longer than that of a fruit fly. This, however, was so much different of a case. If left untreated, a problem such as this would not only take a large toll on everybody involved, but also it would probably be something that could and eventually would scar all three of them for life. Every year it was always the same, Christmas reunions and birthday parties, these three - all together, all the time. Of course as the years went on situations changed and they matured and relationships matured with new ones added, such as with Cathy and San, and this was the routine of life. At least, it's what she knew of life. Yukari wasn't naive; she knew that there would eventually be problems between each of them, especially Amano and Hitomi with all of their upcoming commitments. But this wasn't a problem. This was a full-fleshed out situation. This was an issue, focusing not only how it was to be resolved, but also how it would _stay resolved. Truly, her words make entire sense... what were they to do now?_

"So have you talked to Amano yet?" Catherine desperately tried to clear the silence. It was creepy and unusual, and she only wished it were but another morning where she could play her favorite Selena tracks at full blast to her and Hitomi's enjoyment, while they would feast on an entrée of different cereals from just about everywhere. Those were the norms of practically every weekend morning in the last month or so, having Cathy dusting something or baking something, Hitomi trying her luck out with Spanish song lyrics and ending up playing "Dreaming of You" instead to cheat off with the English dialogue, and Naria probably just eating her kibbles and shedding more white fur to Catherine's distaste. That had been so normal, so predicted, so taken for granted. How she would give up anything to go back there a second time. She was just thankful that her and Yukari were on their spring holidays, for if school were to be involved it would be exceedingly difficult to try and solve this problem from a distance.

"Hell no," Yukari scoffed to Cathy's inquiry, miffed at the very thought of Amano Nekuchi at such a time. "This is probably all of his fault for all ya know. The guy can be such a jack-ass, I swear."

"You really think he started this?" Catherine asked questionably, remembering Amano's angered image whisk by her last night. An image as upset as that one would need a cause to be angry, he would need a _reason to be as mad as he was and Hitomi was the only one who could possibly be the answer to that pondering._

"Well..." Yukari's voice trailed, feeling her breath draw in memory and thought. "It's probably my fault too."

"Your fault?" Cathy looked to her curiously, swallowing silently. Why did she just get such an awful feeling upon hearing that?

"Yeah," Yukari nodded as if in disappointment of herself. "Yukari the idiot huh?"

"Hey, don't say that," Cathy assured sympathetically. "None of this is your fault, Yukari! Why do you think you're involved?"

"Because," she muttered lamely in reply, beginning to easily convince herself that it _was her fault. "Don't you remember when I called Amano yesterday? Right after those two strange kids left?"_

"Right..."

"Well, I told him, not about those two kids, but about Hitomi.. leaving us that is. I told him about how she woke up yesterday morning all out of it and everything and how she hadn't returned yet. Then he checked his messages at that time and heard this disturbing phone call that Hitomi had made an hour or so earlier. I really wanted to tell you and San about it last night but I was afraid I would only complicate an unwanted situation. Seems a little late for that now."

"Wait a minute," Cathy thought of such things for a second. "But none of these things could have gotten Amano _that mad. Was it that disturbing phone call or something that could have tipped him off the edge?"_

"Probably, probably that and what I told him of the phone call. See, it was from Hitomi calling from the Ramada. That's where she was last night."

"Where is that?"

"Oh, it's a well-known hotel downtown, I had NO idea why Hitomi would be there and neither did Amano, and moreover I only wonder how she got there because she had no money on her that I remember, and downtown is a good way off from here on foot. Anyway, that's besides the point. She had left a message saying she badly needed Amano's help; some friend of hers had just been in accident."

"Oh my Lord, that's horrible!"

"I know! But he got the message way too late, and his machine had cut her off before she could leave him a way to contact her, seeing as she didn't have her cell. I thought about it for a while... and I just... I just kinda knew who that "friend" must have been. So I told him."

Catherine nodded, starting to actually understand the basic foundation of all of the complications, "This is what got Amano upset, I presume?"

"Well, I think, that is assuming that we're right - assuming that Hitomi had been going downtown to visit... Van Fanel. I mean it sounds crazy, hell yeah, but I kept thinking of those two kids and how they were telling us these impossible things about how they came here with that Van guy, and Hitomi had mentioned wanting to see someone right before she left yesterday. All these things put together made the answer more clearer than crystal, you know?"

"Definitely," Catherine made a heave of a sigh, feeling this problem truly was exerting to the very limits that problems have.

"But that's still weird..." Yukari mused suddenly. "I mean, Amano didn't sound too upset on the phone, he was more worried for Hitomi's safety and Van's safety actually! I didn't tell him about those kids, and I especially didn't mention how they said this Van guy loved Hitomi, I'm not that stupid. Hitomi would have to fess up about that on her own, so I'm not sure why Amano would be so upset... I mean that's crazy! In all of these years I've never heard of him being so mad, it truly isn't like him. He's never even raised his tone with her I don't think... much less do something like he did last night."

"I guess all of the reasons we won't know unless we ask," Catherine stated the inevitable tapping her fingers against the dining table in hopelessness. "And I doubt either of us have what it takes to ask Hitomi, do we?"

"I sure as hell can't," Yukari mumbled in desperation. "And honestly, maybe we shouldn't be poking around just yet anyway. This may root down deeper than we know and if that's the case I don't look forward to making anything worse."

"Yeah, you're right, I--" Catherine was just about to finish her agreement before the sharp tone of a ringing phone jostled through the morning air.

The two remained awkwardly still for a second as the ring went on its third call, each knowing that there was a cord phone in Hitomi's bedroom by where her alarm radio had once been, both wondering if she would be the first to answer it.

The phone rang for the fifth time.

"I got it," Cathy uttered, wishing she didn't have to answer it and just let it be, but she didn't want the piercing sound of the ringing telephone annoying Hitomi in there, or stressing her out. Of course Catherine went after the cord phone by the kitchen, not even wishing to tiptoe into Hitomi's bedroom for the other one.

The phone rang for the sixth time as Cathy kind of oddly stared at it, a thousand case scenarios flooding her head. What if it was someone who wanted to speak to Hitomi? Would Cathy lie and say the girl was busy? But then, what if it was urgent? Hell, what if it was Amano?! What on earth would she do then!

The phone rang for the seventh time, and Catherine (who was adequately disappointed that the other end hadn't hung up yet) grabbed the receiver and sort of held it, afraid to face the other line yet wishing for the telephone's nuisance noise to shut up. "Heeeellloooo..." a dimmed female voice called from within the receiver, which Cathy held about a foot away from her face. "Hello? Anyone there? Or is it 'konnichiwa'? Uh oh.. Mrs. Kanzaki!!! What do I say? 'Hello' or 'konnichiwa'?? Moshi what?? Moshi moshi? Is that what I say? Oh okay, thanks, moshi moshi anyone home? And don't expect me to say that in Japanese because that's just asking for miracles!"

Even at the drabness of today's ups and downs, particularly downs, Cathy had to bite her lip from laughing at San's aloofness, easily portrayed via telephone apparently. She couldn't believe how relived she was to hear San Askielowicz (probably the only person who could receive so much culture shock in such a short amount of time) rather than all of the possible things Cathy had conjured up in her mind.

"Hello San, it's Cathy. You don't know how incredibly funny you sound."

"Oh please Cathy," San bickered laughingly in defense happy to know that someone had actually picked up. "You were a foreigner too just a month ago, don't forget that!"

"I won't..." Catherine smiled. Poor San, she was so very lighthearted it was almost hurtful to hear such a happy tone, knowing that one way or another; San's joyous mood would have to be brought down with some complicated news.

"Who is it?" Yukari asked curiously leaning herself against the refrigerator as she approached. She too was enormously thankful that it sure didn't sound like Amano by Cathy's more friendly expression.

"Oh Yukari, San's on the phone--" She tried to answer before being cut off by the tiny voice in the receiver.

"Yukari's there too? Hey Cathy! What are you guys planning this fun day without me? Can I join in? Pleeease? Please, please, please, please and please?"

Yukari had to hold back a smile too, able to hear San's accentuated words without even being near the telephone. She looked to Catherine sensing that smile fading, remembering that on their innocent drive home last night, they had been planning for a fun-filled girls' day out today with Hitomi, had things not gone so morbidly wrong.

Cathy returned Yukari's confounded expression, lying with the thoughts: "Who should break the news? You or me?"

Yukari, whom Catherine noticed had picked up the golden ring from the table, stared at it inanely and nodded in Cathy's direction, symbolizing that this was one challenge she was willing to face.

"Hey San, it's Kari." Her voice was drab, trying to foreshadow what she eventually would have to say.

"Yukari! Nice to hear from you! Where'd Cathy go? Well, anyway are you guys still up for breakfast ice-cream or what? You guys like gotta totally remind me what the hot spots in Aimsa are, I forgot like ten years ago!"

"Well, actually San," Yukari sighed twirling the cord looking at Catherine helplessly, both wishing that the situation was as fun and exciting as San made it seem. "We really gotta cancel that."

"Seriously?" San began to pick up on the dark and bleak tone. "Cancel everything you mean? Did I miss something?"

"A lot..." Yukari hushed under her breath, glancing at the ring lying within her palms.

"Well, c'mon Kari, spill, this sounds bad."

"Oh but it is. Prepare yourself San, this will be a story you won't like to hear."

* * *

He observed curiously as she knead the dough perfectly, fine hands working like a well-oiled machine. Rhythmic yet fast paced, it wasn't hard to see just how she managed to get everything done. The young woman, not yet past her early thirties, was just so well organized and functioned incredibly systematically, so much so that things and jobs and duties became accomplished without hesitation. However, because of such responsibilities and demands, Angela Ferentini's youth was far from obvious. It was easy to assume she was a few years ahead than what she actually was, because of all the markings time and stress had given her. From all of the dishwashing and cooking, and also cleaning as the high school custodian, Angela's hands wore soft wrinkles along the backs and across her palms. Her hair was never fancy much, pale to dirty blonde ringlets usually tied back in a copious bunch with strands sometimes running down the sides of her pretty face. Although work and worries often did get to her, Shied could tell there was not one challenge that could take away from his Mum's beauty. Her eyes, an amazing azure, were always lively and encouraging, sometimes strict and glaring with command, but always encouraging. Not a hint or hue of makeup would touch her elegant skin, and even when Shied would propose on buying her a cosmetic set along with his Aunt Milerna's, he knew his Mum would only refuse. She was a natural woman who heeded not to the concerns of the outside, but stayed only on the inside with what was important to her. She wore her lips thin, pressed usually in a handsome form never really displaying much on emotion, but every once in a while they would trickle on a smile like no other. Her smile was like brilliance to him, like laughing sunshine to light his days this long, past year. He didn't remember seeing the days come and go as rapidly as they had, for that warm and loving smile was the only thing that would fill his memories of this short yet marvelous time.

"Boy, why you just standing there?" Without even having to turn her back, Angela Ferentini could sense Shied's soft eyes, inspecting her in his astounded silence. A lot of the time, she would question why he would just sometimes sit and look at things, but Shied said he wasn't looking; he was studying, pondering, thinking. She would usually just laugh and go on about her business, but inside a flicker of pride would grow within her, amazed herself to know a boy so young would already possess an ingenious intellectuality that she could only admire. Her little Shied was just so clever.

Wondering why he was slow to respond, Angela reached over and put the stove to low heat, avoiding the spitting crackle of the eggs licking against the oil sending spurts of hot liquid flying rapidly through the air. Trying to calm down the cooking scenario with a spatula in one hand and the panhandle in the other, she finally turned in his direction.

Shied smiled at her curious eyes, still wordless.

"What'cha thinkin' of?" She said, softer this time, keeping her glance on him as the oil war simmered down. Usually, when Shied would just be hanging around doing nothing, she would get him up and going on some chore that was to be done to keep the child busy. It wasn't that she was trying to be hard on him, but Angela secretly understood that Shied liked doing things for her; it was something he wasn't used to. She figured, seeing as he was raised as pampered royalty growing up, Shied was fond of leading what seemed to him like a normal life. She knew he found it more amusing to crack open eggs and measure the brown sugar to make peanut butter cookies, than to analyze which citizens were due with taxes or which roadways called for repair. But for some reason, this time, Angela wasn't going to request anything of Shied. She didn't want him to be busy and distracted, and to instead keep her company as he was, for this day was different. This day was very special.

"You're making panserotti?" He questioned sitting by her on a small stool by the kitchen counter, watching as she centered some tomato paste and chunks of vegetables in the middle of the circular form of dough.

"Um hum," she nodded smiling kindly at him, then added, "your favorite."

"Oh! But they all are!" He exclaimed suddenly in reply, realizing for the first time that the enormous mounds of prepared foods lying throughout the counter top were all of his most preferred dishes. Currently she was working away at her fourth panserotti, a chocolate cake was just about finished with baking, unopened cartons of Chinese food were waiting to be eaten, five or six fresh mangos lay ready to be sliced and served and many more things his eyes could only feast upon and his mouth could only drool at the sight of. Why, Angela must have been up way early that morning to get a head start on all of these mouth-watering, stomach-grumbling foods, either that or she had been planning this for much longer than he knew.

"Mum! You're so nice!" His sapphire eyes lit with his words, filled with energy. "May I help?"

"Of course honey!" Angela laughed mildly, delighted to know he was no short of excited to her cooking contribution, and that she had gotten him so warped with doing chores and household work, that he was voluntarily requesting to join in all by himself.

"But don't you forget about your friends," Dusting off her floured hands on her apron, Angela tilted her head in the direction of the kitchen doorway. "They're probably just waking up, they must be parched. Sleeping on the sofa is no fun duty."

"Should I get them each a glass of apple or orange juice?"

"Apple's out hon, but orange should do fine. You can tell them good morning for me and breakfast should be served shortly, I just gotta get them pancakes done. Please and thank you Shied. I'll make some chocolate pancakes just for you."

"No problem," Shied nodded obediently, secretly delighted to hear of his favourite style pancakes being specially prepared, skipping off his stool and fetching two glasses. As he managed to weasel through the small kitchen towards the refrigerator, he couldn't help but think of his Mum's words she had spoken about a month ago, which were now strong within his thoughts, ever since he had awaken this morning. It still hadn't slipped his mind, and he had been thinking of them every second after they had been uttered. They had been powerful, commanding; yet in all of their entirety, they were sad and touching and thought-provoking. It was just like Angela to try to put up a strong front, and look as if she were only saying the words because she had to, but both her and Shied knew what lay beyond orders and nods. That night, she had asked him kindly that when the day would come, that they would not speak a word of sadness or grief. She had specifically instructed him that that day would be special, but not sad. His Mum had said she wanted to see no tears or feel no pain. It was kind of ironic actually, because that night, Shied could have sworn he had heard her crying...

The eggs were cooked now, bringing a silence to the ever-bustling kitchen, only filled with the soft morning noises of Angela measuring out the pancake mix or Casey meowing and profusely rubbing her ankles in demand to be fed. In all of its simplicity, it sure looked like the average morning to Shied, especially in these past few weeks since his adopted mother had allowed him to stay home from school. His Mum was working so diligently now, knowing that she had double the amount of people to feed, and also because of reasons that neither her nor Shied wanted to fully address. He didn't want to and wasn't going to question just why she was making all of his favorite meals and not asking him to vacuum or sweep the house, because both her and Shied knew why. This day was special, and that was all there was to it. Although the two of them tried so hard to conceal whatever they thought and go about as if it were a day like any other, the little actions and insignificant things were just what symbolized how different these precious last hours would come to be.

Angela lifted her head slightly, as she carefully poured the pancake mixture into the pan and smiled at Shied. The smile was comforting, yet he could simply sense that it was also weak and frail. He knew she was thinking of the very same things, of just how special everything was.

* * *

"You have to be kidding me," San whispered the words quietly, trying to be optimistic in her words but sensing her tone was even more depressive and anxious than before. San knew what she was like when she worried over something: she would pull back her hair furiously with her hands and her words would stutter and become somewhat repetitive, just as she was doing now. She couldn't come to familiarize with any sort of happiness or joking behavior in Yukari Uchida's voice. It was all serious, so serious that she just didn't want to accept it anymore.

"I can't believe this. You mean Amano just left her, like that??"

"We don't' really know for sure," Yukari replied hesitantly from the other end, hands still examining the yellow loop lying against her palm. "And trust me, I doubt we'll ever know the full details on exactly what happened, but he left his ring here if that's evidence enough."

"His engagement band?" San's eyes widened and her words lowered in volume at saying such things, feeling that reality was nothing but utterly horrible. "That's terrible."

"It is," Yukari couldn't help but agree, nudging the cord phone against her shoulder as she leant her weight against the wall. She had just managed to succeed in what she didn't want to do, which was to totally break down San's spirit second after second. It was hard to even imagine that the girl had called full of good and happy intentions, seeming more colourful than a rainbow or even brighter than a firefly. Her personality glowed in that way, lively and vivacious, but anybody that was anybody couldn't resist but to drop down in mood when it came to discussing the issue at hand. She couldn't think of or come with anyone who would be smiling at a time as trying and confusing as this.

"Does she have any ideas?" Cathy inquired from beside her as she mopped the kitchen floor to what Yukari recalled must have been the third time in just that hour. She had known from Hitomi's once happy stories that Catherine was something of a clean freak, but even then the floor couldn't be shinier if the girl were to go down on her knees and were to wax and polish it for fifty days on end. Then again, Yukari also knew that in times of tribulation many people did repetitively what they did best or at least what they can do, which is probably why Yukari had been playing around with the inanimate ring for so long, just because for a few seconds it could provide a minor distraction from all of the arising problems, just as Cathy found the continuous cleaning of the floor to bring Hitomi and Amano's situation a little further from her mind.

"Sorry, I'm fresh out," San had overheard Catherine's question, taking in a heave of a deep breath. What kind of idea would anybody have at this time anyway? Even if she thought about it, San knew she wouldn't be able to devise a plan or action that could possibly bring about a good scenario in this case. The most any of them could do that would neither be beneficial nor distracting would be just to stand or sit and do inane things just like they were already doing. It may seem lazy and uncaring, but truthfully, it was the only thing they could do without risking on making matters worse. If those two girls were to confront Hitomi, they would be taking the chance on upsetting her and making San's cousin even more depressed, and if they were to try to get something out of Amano, chances are such uncalled for actions might entice his anger. The separated couple were at totally different ends of the spectrum at the time, and it seemed as if the three confounded bridesmaids lay smack in the middle.

Catherine paused her cleaning to contemplate for a second, noticing anyway that her mop was literally dry after having encircled most of the house four or five times already. She lay her chin above her yellow latex hands which lay just on top of the mop handle (seeing as Catherine was barely a foot taller than her cleaning utensil). She couldn't help but notice the way Yukari simply stood where she was, no notion of communication coming from her and not a peeping sound emitting from a tiny voice on the other line. It surely did seem as if simultaneously all three of them had smashed right into a mental dead end. But there had to be a way out of this, if not an easy solution, than possibly even a difficult one would put an end or at least commence an ending to these rather complicated problems. It was only the matter of which of these not-so-easy solutions did they want to take on first.

"You're thinking what I'm thinking, aren't you?" Yukari looked to Catherine, noticing that same grimacing yet accepting glance glower upon her face. It was the look of someone, of anyone, who just didn't want to do what was truly unavoidable. Catherine and Yukari knew that as their duty as devout bridesmaids and having been friends with Hitomi and Amano for however long, it was their absolute responsibility to fix what they could in any way they can, even if the only methods possible may risk making the situation even worse.

"Do we have any choice?" Catherine verbalized her thoughts in hopelessness. "If we don't go up to her now, things will only be left unanswered for all of us."

"You're right, I know," Yukari sighed an agree. It seemed as if the deal were struck, subconsciously even. Whether they liked it or not, whether she would like it or not, Hitomi Kanzaki would be the person Cathy and Yukari would soon have to face.

"You've guys thought of something?" San's voice piped up from the other end, as she practically had to contain herself from tearing off a fingernail with her teeth. This suspense was truly getting to her; after all, San had thought it would be marvelous being allowed to stay in Aimsa for as long as she would be because of the supposed "peace" and "fun" of the idea. She had had such great hopes for these weeks before the wedding, knowing that she could be involved in not just the one-time ceremony, but all of the pre-planning and flutters of excitement and anticipation with her utmost favorite cousin and friends. That's exactly how San had envisioned it in her mind, picture perfect, as many imagined daydreams come to be. Really, it hadn't seemed too farfetched at the time. It wasn't her fault she hadn't thought of inserting a half-human and half-cat species in there, or maybe angry fiancés who looked more irritated with their own lovers than anything else. It's not to say that San didn't know how to handle a problem, or didn't expect problems once in a while, but truthfully and honestly this had to be the single one problem where she neither saw it coming or knew just how to go about it.

"I think we _have to talk to her," Yukari stated what even her lips had to struggle to say. She didn't like knowing the fact, much the less speaking it into the open air, but there was no denying that if they wanted to help, they should not be afraid to help. Whatever may come, they could always still congratulate themselves for at least trying and attempting a solution._

"You're going to talk with her? Have you lost it? I thought you said she was in a sour mood," San couldn't quite come to believe their intentions. Sure, it did spare her from having to be in the confrontation too, but still it didn't seem like a logical decision. She knew well that when Hitomi did not want to talk, the girl would not come to even utter a word. Although Hitomi was almost always pleasant and cooperative, she was still a human being and her downsides would sometimes become apparent just like with anybody else.

"Like Cathy said, we don't have much of a choice," Yukari answered, hesitant with the words the longer time went by. "I mean, it's at least me and Cath here -- there's two of us. It may make her feel better or worse to have two shoulders to cry on... but we can't just leave her in there crying all by herself..."

"True, San regrettably agreed, feeling the words were wheedled out of her in defeat. Yukari and Catherine were there with Hitomi as of now, so honestly they were probably the only ones who could estimate just how approachable Hitomi was at this time, and if they felt that they might be productive in confronting her, then who was San to object? After all, she was here in her Aunt Hikoro Kanzaki's home, a short way away but still quite far enough to be unable to make much of a difference in that confrontation. She didn't want to label herself as useless (although she couldn't quite help that since, being the newcomer, she had barely any knowledge on the turbulent rise and falls of these relationships) but it was also equally hard to provide any helpful insight. She wanted to recall a time when she could remember her cousin being so upset, so utterly miserable, but San highly doubted that Hitomi's skinned knees or that one bad report card could adequately match up to the high standards that were set by this problem. This situation was unparalleled by any other, at such a magnitude of its own that any action would probably be more ineffective than beneficial or destructive. Just what did they have to lose?

"How are we gonna do this?" Catherine couldn't help but input, wondering if she was actually curious enough to plan out a strategy, or if she was just finding ways to buy herself time from the dreading moment.

"She sounds awake enough to talk with us," Yukari thought aloud. "So we'll just have to go in there, as kindly as possible, and ask whatever comes to mind first."

"Just how unstable is she?" San couldn't help but worriedly ponder.

"Let's just say out of all the things Hitomi's emotions has put her though," Yukari stated dryly remembering clearly all of those things. "This has to be the worst of them all."

"Wow... I see..." San answered, feeling a little distracted from the full response she had wanted to say as she heard soft footsteps behind her. Hitomi's old home had been so quiet; she hadn't realized her talking echoed easily. She had noticed too when she had first arrived that the Kanzaki residence was almost a mirror-image of what it was like back when she had last visited a few years ago. Its look had never changed or retired, much to her delight since she could find it so familiar. Everything still had a touch of Hitomi in it, even though that girl herself had been gone for a year going to two now. San held her hand over the receiver with her palm, as she turned to face behind her.

Hikoro Kanzaki was up and about, aged but pretty face smiling at her niece. Her worn, graying black hairs hidden in a mound of towel sat upon her head, as she had just emerged from a morning shower. San could still identify without difficulty the facial similarities that Hitomi and Hikoro shared. It wasn't so much eye colour or hair colour, but the round, gentle way of their eyes or their soft, fine skin that held the most similarities. San knew that most of Hitomi's Caucasian attributes came directly from her late father, of whom they both slightly remembered from their younger days when San would come to visit with her mother, Kassa Askielowicz. They would not only come to visit Hitomi and Hikoro, but also Hitomi's father, Paul Askielowicz, who was Kassa's brother and San's uncle, and the reason why they were related to Hitomi in the first place. It was when both San and Hitomi reached the age of nine when their relationship was equally strengthened. San's father, Anthony Woitowicz, had divorced her mother and so Kassa took custody and since then both San and Kassa have been using their maiden names. The same went with Hitomi when, in the same year, her father, San's uncle, had died in a tragic plane crash. It had hit Hikoro like a lightning bolt, so much to the extreme where San remembered that she had kept it secret from Hitomi for almost five months. San's mother Kassa was burdened by it too, after having been in a recent divorce and now having lost her only brother. It had been then that the Askielowicz family had came to Aimsa and stayed for near to three depressing months. It had been San's worst visit ever to Japan, remembering being so young and having to face Hitomi who looked more broken than shattered glass. That had been the day of Paul Askielowicz's funeral, or more so memorial, with San's mother mourning over the loss of her brother, and Hikoro and Hitomi being much beyond consolation. It had been so trying for the two... but Hikoro Kanzaki had always been a strong woman. Hitomi grew up without a hint of fault within her, and the next time San had visited it was like things were normal again. Hikoro was tough with Hitomi, yet she was wise. Still, even with that thought in mind, San had a hard time imagining that Hikoro Kanzaki wasn't really a blood relative of hers. Although she didn't get the chance to visit often, the Kanzakis were as close to family to her as any of her relatives had ever been, if not closer.

Now, Hikoro's smile was gentle, much like San's had once been before the "news" had been broken to her. If anything, San hoped that Hikoro would never find out about it, or else it might just be like living the exterior trauma of that heart-wrenching memorial all over again. It was such a pity; San had thought this visit would be the most perfect of them all. Never did she realize just how extremely difficult that perfection is to attain.

"Is that Hitomi on the phone?" Hikoro inquired, slowly unwrapping the towel as strands of wet black came falling down her face, lined with soft yet wrinkling smiles. "I hope you girls have fun today, but tell Hitomi, Yukari and Catherine to drop by here first together and pick up you and the Hyundai. It'll be no fun if you all have to take the train to get around, and since Yukari and Catherine can drive, you girls can have the car all day if you'd like."

San couldn't help but pause, feeling her heart flutter sadly at such joy-affiliated words in which she would usually throw a fit of happiness, as her eyes fell upon the white phone cradled on her shoulder. Yukari hadn't piped a word just yet on the other end, and San couldn't help but allow her hand to slip off the receiver to make the girl aware of the stuck situation San was in.

"Ummm.... I...." San could hear herself stammering, practically stuttering again, knowing she was in a fetish for words that didn't exist. She couldn't make up an excuse in fast enough time that wouldn't involve flat-out lying. San more or less liked to avoid topics rather than lie about them, but San also knew that Hikoro was a very straightforward and disciplined person as she always has been. There had never been a day when San would have stayed over and her and Hitomi would successfully get away with anything. Hikoro, like many mothers, had a round the clock watch and omniscient knowing on the happenings of her children and all who they related with.

"As a matter of fact," Hikoro continued, placing the towel on top of the sofa and motioning to San to hand her the telephone, much to San's dismay, "I do need to speak to her myself. That girl needs a good talking. I told her to call Timothy and Alexandra about a million times now but the girl is getting careless with her duties... so close to the wedding!"

Hikoro let out an exasperated sigh, managing a smile to San, "You don't mind if I cut in, do you hon? It'll only be a minute, I just can never seem to catch Hitomi at a convenient time."

_ 'Well, now's far from convenient...' San couldn't help but grumble in her thoughts, feeling like she was much too overweighed now with these problems. She also knew that this was delaying Catherine and Yukari from speaking with Hitomi, as they were hopefully thinking of ways to help San escape from Hikoro's prying eyes._

"Actually, I'm speaking to Yukari," she confessed truthfully, deciding that much didn't hurt.

"Really?" Hikoro looked confused as she glanced at the glowing green display of her telephone. "I thought I read Hitomi's number on the call display." 

"Oh, she's at Hitomi's house," San fessed up again, feeling she was now making matters worse. Yukari confirmed that.

"Gosh, San, what's happening? She wants to speak to Hitomi?" Yukari's worried voice came loudly across the line. "She can't do that! Hell, we can't even do that! I don't think Hitomi's gonna be one happy camper talking to her mother right now. Trust me, it's not a good idea."

San didn't know how to reply, after all, Hikoro was standing right in front of her and she didn't want to say anything incriminating, much the less tell her aunt that she could not speak with her own daughter. Honestly, how did San just get stuck in such a trivial position? Hadn't she been the one lucky enough to avoid having to confront Hitomi? This felt just as intimidating, if not worse!

"I have no idea what to do," she hushed quickly into the receiver, saying the words for Yukari's sake and hoping they were just beyond earshot of Hikoro. "But...." she raised her head and smiled in her aunt's direction, "would you like to speak with Yukari, Auntie? I guess she wants to say hello."

"WHAT??" Yukari's astonished exclamation came blasting through the receiver, louder than ever could be. No matter however long it had been that the Kanzaki and Uchida family had known each other, Yukari couldn't deny the fact that somewhere rooted within her, she held a great fear towards Hikoro Kanzaki. After all, the woman had put her own daughter, Yukari's best friend, through three years of psychiatric treatment! During those years, Hitomi had never smiled when she saw her mother, other times she would actually be quite normal, but never around Mrs. Kanzaki. It had only been fairly recently when Hitomii's relationship with her mother had started to truly smoothen over, but even then Yukari understood that those void-like doubts still were like massive unfilled gapes. Since Yukari had grown up with Hitomi, she also shared Hitomi's immediate respect to Hikoro Kanzaki, never wishing to challenge the woman's authority. So if this was the case, even when Yukari was a good grown 20-year-old woman, how on earth was she supposed to explain to Hikoro that her only daughter, once labeled crazy by her own mother, was now temporarily "un-engaged" because of an encounter with somebody that she secretly loved from a different planet...

Hell, Yukari was in shit and loads of it. She didn't have one clue what to do, and whether on the phone or not, she felt petrified. Why hadn't San explained it all? She seemed to get so much better along with Hikoro than anybody else, especially not feeble Yukari. San was strong. Catherine was strong. Hitomi was strong, even at moments that should have broken her down completely. Yukari didn't like to be that solitary, she liked to have people around to help her in such situations. She wasn't weak, Yukari could be quite the intolerable force when she wanted to be, but that was only against certain people. Prestige figures like the wise and powerful "mother-of-the-best-friend" were people she did not like to associate with in high-level situations such as these.

"Hi there, Yukari," Hikoro's voice was amiable, so sickeningly amiable that it purely frightened Yukari to imagine when that once friendly voice would eventually transform into nothing short of a demon's growl. All parents are alike when they're angry... they are just plain scary, even when your adult yourself. Yukari's mother was no short of terrifying when furious, on a scale of Hellish beings standing as the minions, whereas Hitomi's mother was practically Lucifer himself. That's no offense meant to Hikoro of course, but she was nothing short of difficult when things don't go her way.

"So how are you so early in the morning Yukari? I haven't' spoken to you in a while either."

"Oh... it's been great," Yukari stammered, realizing just how much of a gigantic lie or phrase of horrible sarcasm that previous statement had been.

Catherine observed in anxiousness, holding onto the mop so tightly she wouldn't be surprised if it lost colour where she grasped. She had been following along on what was happening, but Cathy didn't have too much knowledge on Hitomi's family. She didn't have to have too much knowledge apparently, for just judging by Yukari's often "For-the-love-of-it-woman-SAVE-ME!" looks Cathy knew that it was quite possible that Hitomi's mother was less of an approachable figure than Hitomi was at this time

"That's good to hear," Hikoro continued, already concocting her over-the-phone lecture to Hitomi about being so careless with her own wedding duties in her mind. "I hope you don't mind me cutting in for Hitomi, it'll only be a couple of minutes. I just need to remind my own daughter something... once again."

Yukari swallowed, practically having to fight off choking from that action, almost feeling invisible sweatbeads forming on her skin. She looked to Cathy pleading for a solution, but knowing there was none she could offer and if any, there were none Hikoro Kanzaki would easily comply to. Yukari knew in all certainty there were only two mouse holes out of this situation, teeny escapes leading to large and unknown places where lurking cats may just be waiting to make situations even worse. Nevertheless, Yukari was no safer stammering like she was, so she had to come and bear reality to the decisions she had to make. It was either to tell Hikoro Kanzaki the flat-out truth (Yukari would much rather omit some of the stranger details but knowing Mrs. Kanzaki she would simply drain them out of Yukari one way or another) or she could go the easy yet also difficult way out for herself-- give Hitomi the telephone. She was actually starting to consider that idea... how bad could it get? Actually, no, that was stupid. That would just put Hitomi through even more stress than she was already going through, and Yukari didn't want to dare do such a thing. She realized now that there was a third and larger mousehole awaiting her, one that led to a small and pitiful feeling towards herself, but it was still an escape nonetheless. She could _lie to Hikoro. She hadn't done that before, never had reason to really, but now was as good as reason as anything else. Hitomi wasn't in the mood to chit-chat with anybody and the absolute last person Yukari would pair her up with would be Hitomi's skeptical mother, Hitomi's mother and also Amano Nekuchi. Yukari's bridesmaid mission was to keep those two depressive figures as far away from Hitomi as possible._

"Actually, to tell the truth," _'bad choice of words to start off a lie...' she couldn't help but heckle herself with a pang of guilt, but this was the best way out and she knew it. "Hitomi's really tired right now... she's uh... sleeping."_

"Sleeping? Still?"

"Yeah..." Yukari felt even more hesitant, glancing momentarily at her analog watch. It was only 9:30 in the morning, and quite frankly, how early did Mrs. Kanzaki expect Hitomi to be awake anyway? In all truth, had this crisis not arisen, Yukari herself would still be happily tucked in bed for the next few passing hours.

"Well, when she wakes up tell her to _please call her mother --"_

Then, as Hikoro Kanzaki was interrupted mid-sentence, Yukari's face went a ghastly white. Her slender fingers went instantly rigid, near to crushing the plastic of the phone within her hands, then jelly and flimsy having to keep that phone from falling out of her grasp. Paled, stock-still and ruptured with tension, she knew she couldn't deny it. She couldn't deny what she had just heard.

Somebody else had just picked up. Someone else was now on the line.

_ 'Maybe it's San, maybe it's San!!' Yukari instantly started chanting in the words in her head, hopeful yet hopeless, knowing first of all that it couldn't possibly be Catherine for the girl stood right before her. But then again, why was she hoping for something that couldn't be concerning San? Yukari knew that it probably wasn't San. The Kanzaki residence only had one phone that she remembered. There were only two lines in this conversation, and the other end had only one phone hooked up with no chance of someone else 'picking up'. However, this place, this present home of Hitomi's had two phones with three different people. Two of those persons were around one phone. Yukari had that phone, Catherine stood with her. There was only one other person who had the ability to be the third in this anxious conversation, only one person in that one room with that one other phone._

"Hello Mother." Hitomi said.

* * *

"Amano?" 

_"You know what, if you're trying to hide this from me, you're doing a pretty lousy job." _

_"Maybe that' s because I don't have anything to hide." _

_"Oh really, is that so?" _

"Um… Mr. Nekuchi?" 

_"Yeah. Really. And you know something? You can leave me the hell alone now. I'm tired of this stupid conversation. If you don't want to trust me, then that's your problem. Deal with it." _

_"Trust you? How can I trust you? I asked you for a very simple answer, Hitomi, as simple as it can come and yet you still fail to answer me. It was a yes or no question, but who cares now because I think we both know the answer… I think we're both perfectly aware that you are in total love with this guy. You love him don't you? Sure, of course you do. I know you just—" _

_"Why don't you just shut your face? You know something Amano? You don't know shit about me! You'll NEVER understand me Amano, do you get that?" _

_"I'll never understand you?! What in the hell is that supposed to –"_

_"Yeah. That's right. You're too fucking stubborn to see it or even care. All you are thinking is 'oh, of course it has to be someone else'. You won't even consider that it could be another reason, would you? Of course not! You just don't care for me – at all." _

_"Really? REALLY? Oh come on, what bullshit, Hitomi. What bullshit. I don't care for you – is that it? You mean my constantly being there for you and providing for you for these last four long as hell years is what you consider 'not caring'?" _

_"Oh good for you, so you're loaded with cash and brains, I don't really give two shits about that that Amano, because you know what? Where was your care when I really needed you… not your stupid money. Where were you when I wanted to talk to someone about my visions or—" _

_"Oh, don't bring this crap up right now—"_

_"No, see? This is exactly what I have to put up with… you and you're stinking skepticism. Is that called caring? Even now you won't even try being open-minded. Where are you Amano when I really need you? You just abandon me, that's all you do, and all you ever do. You don't want to confront what I have to say, you don't even attempt it… you're just too busy on your little dates with Yukari, isn't that right…? Yeah, I thought so." _

** "Amano Nekuchi?"**

He spun around so abruptly, that he nearly collided with a passing janitor cart, only seconds from having spilt the bucket of sloshing cleaning fluid all across the already slippery halls. Flashing the hospital cleaning lady with a sheepish yet apologetic smile as he helped re-balance a group of sagging mops into a manageable bundle, Amano quickly redirected his attention to whom had been calling on him so repetitively with light taps to the shoulder, feeling his cheeks flourish with embarrassment at his lack of attention. 

Kaye Joi, only two years his senior, returned his dazed glare with a look of curiousity and interest, holding about a dozen clipboards to her chest and peering at him inquisitively through small-frame lenses. Although a relatively little person, Kaye, to Amano, still held the power of three medical surgeons in his darned opinion. Upon joining the apprenticeship program, Amano, knowing him, would settle for no less than the best of the best of an instructor, and after being assigned Kaye he had been quite disappointed to see on just how young of age she was, and the fact that she herself was nothing more than an assistant nurse. Why, that had been the position he had been interested in applying for! Amano had figured he'd hopefully get a medical nurse or a specialist to be able to help around, but Willendorf General Hospital was constantly booked with eager apprentices from his neighbouring Willendorf Medical University, so to him, it wasn't a surprise to be just teamed up with anyone. However, it wouldn't be long after until his opinions would easily sway concerning Kaye. It became evidently clear to him eventually, that she took her role as his senior to the utmost of importance. He was her only pupil, which made the work twice as hard and even more demanding, not to mention that she had graduated top of her class from Willendorf. In just the first few days of his spring holidays he already had practically all of the hospital halls mapped in memory, and not to mention all of the little homework assignments that Kaye gave to him to research on the medical program she had also instructed him to download. It was incredible – she was such a young and tiny representative of a whole lot of success. 

"You look distant." Kaye stated the words easily, studying his eyes so intently as if reading the dialogue of his thoughts. "There's something bothering you, I suppose?"

"Eh…" Amano stammered for a second, realizing just how easily his mind drifted. He couldn't help but find it unfortunate to know that Kaye had caught him dawdling; she knew it wasn't like him to be acting offset, feeling that today he was a thousand times more offset than usual.

"It's really nothing," Amano waved it off confidently with the back of his hand; yet knowing every utterance of that was not of the truth. "I was just… thinking of things."

"I see," Kaye smiled, half supportively, half questionably, yet still without much hesitation, she adjusted her long, white sleeves and handed Amano the heaping pile of clipboards with countless blank data sheets.

"I take it you're still up for work, are you not?"

"Of course, ma'am," Amano nodded his head slightly, brown bangs fraying, receiving the new bundle in his arms, feeling a little weighed with his words. Although his smile was one of eagerness and his eyes shone with ability, truly, Amano just didn't feel up to his usual little chores today… it just wasn't to his best interest. He wasn't typically lazy and far from being anything much of a procrastinator, but little things seemed to wear him down these past few hours. It was almost as if there weren't much ways that he knew of in which he could just have what would be like a normal day. On the outside, friends and companions of his may assume it was a normal day for him, yet Amano knew better than that judgment. Today had been far from a normal day ever since he had awakened from his little to few hours of sleep. That exhaustion had caught up with him, along with the dreadfully heavy emotional baggage that he kept so well under wraps. Amano, though being generally sociable, was the not the type to reveal just about anything to the public, and so his actions and words were still sugar-coated with that usual joust of positive energy and enthusiasm, yet inside, he knew he felt nothing of the case. Bit by bit, the harsh reality and the sour fakeness of his pretend-happy life were beginning to gnaw on his insides, his memories becoming yet more vivid, his worries more intense, and his heart more strangled with confusion and apprehension. He was coming to realize slowly how incredibly fragile his future was now, balancing inexperienced on the high wire of life, suddenly as if coming to terms that if he didn't do something to turn around this rather emotionally tormenting situation, fact had it nothing would and he would be feeling this guilty yet angry way for a long time to come.

"You are to come with me," Kaye didn't give him much time to think however, as she tugged his irresponsive self by the sleeve of the usual nurse-green uniform as she began walking onwards down the hall in front of him, heels smacking loudly as she smiled at passing hospital staff.

"But I already know how to post up the clipboards," Amano couldn't help but argue uselessly in his defense, for some reason wishing so much to be home and doing nothing, or at least alone to his own philosophizing solitude. He was used to being at the hospital for long hours, usually going to his apprentice program (of which he did get paid a small yet fair amount for) after his med classes, and even now during the break he would find himself doing all the doctors' small duties throughout the length of the day. It was great experience, but now Amano did not want to be here. He didn't feel eager, or inspired, or longing to know more. He didn't feel that he wanted to be helpful or insightful. He no longer felt the urge to greet every person with a nod or handshake, and didn't care for any greetings anyway. Amano was sick of being concerned about everyone and everything else, he had enough problems as it was, and none of these could escape his mind. It still wrenched at him, the guilt as if anew, the frustration as if rekindled. He was at a loss on whether he should be still furious, or sad, or envious or confused… for he was but all of these things. The only thing he knew for certain was that everything that he now did was nothing but tiresome and consuming of time not so well spent.

"Yes, I know you do," Kaye turned to him momentarily. "But I thought you asked me to show you how the IBET monitoring systems work. There's only one vacant room right now where I can possibly tinker around with the machines without having to worry about another patient coming in."

"Oh yes, that's right, I'm sorry," Amano hurried the words, scolding himself for being so easily forgetful. Kaye marked the smallest things into her mind, and noticing that Amano was acting distracted at times of duty was one thing he didn't want her thinking of.

"You know you don't have to do so many hours Nekuchi," she paused for a second, so quickly that he had to fight from stumbling against her, as she stared up at him with eyes prying. It was apparent what she was doing, the usual "you-can-turn-back-now-if-you-can't-handle-it" kind of tactic, one that Kaye would often apply in order to break down Amano when he felt weary or anxious to quit. Most of the time it had little to no effect on him, her testing his enthusiasm only making him more apt for the job, but this time was different. For the first occasion in his eager days of dreaming of his medical success, Amano felt like immediately abandoning it all to a soft couch, a pile of junk food regardless of nutrients, a bunch of tacky TV shows or unsolvable crossword puzzles, and a whole lot of depression.

"I'm fine." But no, he couldn't do it; Amano knew he would only be prone to more thinking and heartaches at home. He needed to keep distracted, lest he break down himself into a sopping and confused emotional heap.

"Alright," Kaye still used a testing voice, unsure of Amano's response. "But you've worked here a good deal, Amano, that's great but don't forget that you need your own time too. There's nothing much here for you than the little stuff anyway."

_'The little stuff'… _she had a point when he though of it, especially since lately he hadn't been doing much activity that couldn't be easily accomplished by any passing commoner. There really wasn't any medical expertise required in what he was doing, but nevertheless he couldn't complain. These kind of working hours, whether totally useless or not, still looked promisingly handsome on the resume. Besides, his professor had promised him a unique opportunity for all of his devoted work to Willendorf, and that was actually getting to spend a day in the forensic department next week. It wasn't so much the fact that he got to ogle over decaying cadavers that fascinated him so, but the fact that he, a mere medical student, would be able to help out for the entire day! It was a rare opportunity indeed, one that he so avidly awaited, and wished he could only tell the whole world about. Amano got worked up over the tiniest things when on duty, tiny things he'd often like to share. But today, no matter what good things would become of him, no matter if his lottery ticket came up a winner, no matter if he scrambled upon a blank cheque on the way home, it still didn't seem to matter. It seemed as if Amano had no one to tell…. no one to tell at all no matter what would come to happen. He just didn't feel comfortable in being 'happy' today when there was no one to share such happiness with.

_"I can't believe you're doing this, trying to twist everything around like that." _

_"I'm not trying to twist around anything." _

_"Please, yes you are. How could you even throw your best friend into this? Yukari has nothing to do with the problem here." _

_"Oh bullshit Amano, I know you've had feelings for—" _

_"Correct, that's right. I have had feelings for her… but that was like four years ago when I had gone out with her, Hitomi, I won't deny that much. But you, what about you? What are you denying?" _

_"You still have feelings for her, I know it." _

_"I already told you that I don't. How much more proof do you need? How much proof do you have? Don't accuse me of anything that you do not have the evidence to back up your alibi for." _

_"Well then, quit accusing me of something you do not have evidence for, Amano." _

_"I don't have evidence for? I have plenty of evidence Hitomi – plenty. Such as with just now, I asked you a very simplified question, and yet you didn't respond. Somehow, our conversation—" _

_"'Conversation' my ass, it's an argument now thanks to you." _

_"Yeah, you know what, I don't care what in the hell it is; you can call it whatever you want. But the point of the matter being is that you managed to not answer my question ever… not even indirectly and if that's not proof enough, I don't know what is." _

_"You are being such a—" _

_"I'm going to ask it one more time, Hitomi. Just once more, and this time if in that angered little heart of yours, do you have any… just even a soft enkindling of love towards me, you'll promise you'll answer this. Will you answer me Hitomi? Just this once?" _

_"That's not fair, Amano. I don't even know what you are going to ask." _

_"If you loved me, you would answer any of my questions." _

_"Amano…please don't do this. You know we're in the middle of a fight, it's not fair to throw in the whole 'love' concept into it… it's just inappropriate right now." _

_"When lovers fight even the harshest words can't overthrow the still love they bear within their hearts. Are you asking me to stop demanding things of you… because there is no love in that still heart of yours?" _

_"Amano… I… it's not that… it's just that…" _

_"Hitomi, it's alright if you can't answer, that's not the question I have for you. Hitomi, I'm angry right now, as the same I am saddened, as I know you are. Look, I don't want things to fall apart right now." _

_"You know I don't either! I wanted us to be happy…" _

_"We both did, I know that. But I'm asking for the truth Hitomi, I'm not asking for what will make us happy. I know I love you as much as I ever have… but if that love is not returned… then that is beyond my control." _

_"Amano…" _

_"I want us to be happy, but pretending to be happy people won't get us anywhere… now, Hitomi, if you even remotely care for me, love me, tell me you'll speak the truth now." _

_"…I care for you Amano… I will speak the truth. What would you like to know?" _

_"Thank you. Hitomi, I need to know this, I just need to hear it for myself. Hitomi, please be honest, do you love Van Fanel?" _

"…the pulse rate. Fascinating isn't it?"

The young Chinese assistant nurse looked to him with a sideways smile, feeling as if her long educational lecture on the various usages of the newly released IBET hospital monitoring systems had just been to no avail. He had gazed at her hand tapping on the surface of the bulky device, with eyes looking as if he wasn't even in the same dimension, seeming as if her once eager pupil was being eaten away by something much more demanding. She honestly couldn't say that she had ever seen a day when Amano would be so incredibly unfocused; normally, he would be intrigued by something like the IBET machine but today seemed to be off normal for him. She figured the stress levels the kid put on himself had finally managed to catch up with him; with all of the strenuous work Amano put himself through, she had no ounce of surprise that he would become a little dazed. She hadn't been in the apprenticeship program for very long and Amano had only had an internship at the Willendorf for just a couple of weeks, but the rate at which he learned and became more professional amazed even her, and Kaye was much like that herself. She thought she had been one of the most rigid and fast-paced medical students to attend Willendorf, but Amano was a fine exception as well. Already he was very familiar with many of the head doctors and specialists throughout the building, and flocking with some of the more senior nurses during his breaks, gaining more expertise by the minute. To be honest, she was actually more surprised that he was now showing his fatigue from such fine efforts.

"Yeah… it's uh, great."

Amano looked to her suddenly, trying to hide a rush of pink to his cheeks, well aware that he hadn't been paying one second of attention. He had wanted to, but just didn't, and was now ashamed just by the prying way that she stared at him. She _knew that he hadn't even been listening, and it embarrassed him highly; he felt so irresponsible and ungrateful to how she had taken him all the time and effort to show him to this empty hospital room to recollect her knowledge on the machines to someone who didn't even have enough courtesy to listen. But it wasn't like he could help himself… his memories were __very powerful, and the last one he had just had kept Amano in a state of discomfort. It was so just so vivid, as if the words were escaping his mouth a second time, as if the tightness of the air was strangling him all over again. _

"Amano," Kaye brought her hand to her hip, laying her weight on one side as if tapping her other foot in analysis. "Are you sure you're all right?" 

"Yeah… yeah…I'm fine." Amano waved it off, feeling less enthusiastic or truthful with his words each time, but saying it regardless. He couldn't let her break him down so easily, or else then Kaye would know that Amano was susceptible to such emotional weakness. He had to stay on top of the game. He had to remain alert, though he sure didn't feel that he wanted to at this moment. Still, Amano had to make an effort. 

"So how come this room is empty?" He lifted his gaze to his surroundings for the first time, barely even remembering when she had walked him to this room feeling his strong memories had taken out a chunk of his real life as it absorbed all that he noticed. "I thought it was really hard to find any empty rooms in this ward." 

"It is; very observant Amano," Kaye complimented him, feeling he needed to hear the words at least once this day. It had been keen of him to notice though, especially since this room being empty was under very special circumstances. 

"It's really the strangest story I've known thus far," Kaye sighed, trying not to pay mind to the fact that she really didn't understand it. She just loathed not being able to understand, just like Amano loathed such inabilities. 

"A strange story? In this rigid place?" Amano did his best to focus on the topic at hand. 

"Yeah, funny isn't it? You'd expect this place to be so orderly… but strange things happen. Amano, you have to promise you won't tell anybody this though," she looked to him with a sense of trust. She knew just how amazingly responsible he already was, there really was no reason to even ask if he would keep such things confidential, but just because he was acting a tad bit off today she couldn't help but find herself a little wary of him as well. 

"Of course, sure, as long as you didn't like… kill anyone or anything." 

"Right, like a little person like me managed to kill somebody," Kaye laughed, glad to see that Amano still possessed his comedic sense of imagination even in his most depressive of times. "It's more of the eerie and supernatural than anything else." 

"Supernatural? Like as in ghosts, or something like that?" Amano didn't like the sound of it. He didn't like supernatural things. He didn't like things or aspects that were not so tangible and easily known. It wasn't so much religious ideas that he was wary of, but more so things like visions or extra terrestrials or far out ideas such as those… things that he just had to deal with fairly recently. 

"Well, I don't really know how to explain, much the less classify, it really…" Kaye wandered off in thought, gazing at the empty bed controlling shudders from coming upon her. "I don't get it. It was just like one second the patient was there, and the next, he wasn't." 

Amano raised an eyebrow; skepticism had the best of him, "What do you mean? He purposely left the hospital without anyone noticing?" 

"I'd love to think that, I would," she answered Amano unsurely. "But the thing is, we checked the ward security and entrance surveillance – there was no record of him ever leaving or at least physically checking out of the hospital, plus nobody even saw him leave. What was strangest was the fact that his room blinds were shut when they didn't have to be, and when we finally did get in the room… the far window was wide open." 

"Window?" Amano's head turned instantly in the direction of the room's single window, buried in the furthest wall from him, now shut and hidden away by another set of blinds. However, he didn't have to be able to see outside to know that he was eleven stories above ground level. If Kaye was getting at what he was assuming she was getting at, he just couldn't understand how such a thing could be plausible. 

"You're not seriously suggesting that he would have…" 

"Well, no, not really. You know you and I are much alike – we're not the superstitious people imagining injured folk just climbing out of windows and balance off ledges eleven stories above ground. I'm just saying that no one can explain his sudden exit of the hospital, however it may have been, or why the window would have been left so wide open as it was." 

"Do you think he would have managed to leave the hospital on his own? If his injuries were really serious, chances are this could have been an inside job and somebody assisted him to go unnoticed." 

"I thought of that, but he looked fine enough to get about… not quickly and probably on a limp – we were going to suggest that he use crutches for a while to ease off the pressure on his wounded leg – but that still doesn't explain how he got out unseen by anyone, because he would have been seen by the elevator cameras because there's no way in hell that kid got down the stairwells." 

"That's uh… a puzzler alright. But who did you say this man was again? Maybe he just couldn't afford the medical bills and found some desperate way to escape from here." 

"That's an even more confusing story," Kaye let out a sigh. "I just don't understand it. See, this man, he wasn't any regular patient – you're right, he probably couldn't afford the medical bills because I highly doubt he's all that he seems to be, but it doesn't matter, the authorities had the costs covered anyway." 

"Authorities?" Amano was amazed; he was actually beginning to develop some intrigue on this odd case, at least just enough to keep his memories from flooding his mind again. 

"Yes, officials, a detective really. She had come shortly after he arrived, saying he was a main… I don't know… suspect maybe in some incident that happened by the hotel. Did you hear about it on the news? Weird stuff." 

"I didn't catch it I don't think," Amano didn't want to think of the news, for he knew that the news was at eleven at night and he would usually watch it on a daily basis to keep updated on the Aimsa affairs, except that last night he had still been driving home at eleven, much too miserable to care about the other miseries of his local world. But now, he really didn't like the thought of thinking about any accidents yesterday, for one surely came to mind, bounding him with ugly discomfort. 

"I managed to. They said something about how there was a near-to accident at the Ramada—" 

"Ramada Hotel?" Amano interrupted her mid-sentence. He just had to. There was no way he would get around that concept without making sure of it. He didn't like the sound of that… he didn't like the sound of that at all, the hotel name most especially. For one thing, it was _much too familiar. There weren't near-to accidents or accidents at the Ramada to be heard of everyday, but how ironic was it that in just a day and a half he had already managed to hear of two separate stories stressing the same facts; now he was starting to realize that maybe they weren't really two separate stories after all. _

"Yep, that's the only one in Aimsa," Kaye stated matter-of-factly, surprised Amano wouldn't know that, or at least wouldn't pay attention to that information. "Something happened with a truck that almost hit a woman and this man saved her, the one that came here, I don't know how or why but somehow the guy got injured in the near-to collision –he a had a severe laceration on his left leg, and according to the detective it was actually from the truck's exhaust pipe." 

"Exhaust pipe? As in the one by the truck roof?" He didn't like the sound of this; he really didn't like it at all. It was sounding just too familiar… too likely to be already known to him much to his dismay. It just couldn't be that ironic, could it? Could fate really have sickly tied this in so well? If so, how horribly planned, how horribly synchronized everything was, even when he least wanted it to be. Willendorf was Amano's only form of seclusion… his only refuge and distraction from abounding problems…. He just couldn't cope if this place were to be infested with his anguish also. 

"I know it sounds weird," Kaye shook her head, not bothering to try and play with the details a second time – she already found confusing as it was. "But that's how the story goes. As for the guy, he's even stranger. That detective woman even had me run a check on him." 

"Run a check? You can do that here?" 

"Oh yes, background profiles and all essential information should always be open to us. So anyway, I searched for the guy… an uncommon name… one 'Van Fanel…" 

Amano swallowed thickly. 

"… and the results were all over the place! None of them matched this guy's description mind you… it was so weird. I figured he was using a fake name or something of the sort…" 

Amano could feel the heat build. His eye began to twitch. 

"… But anyway, he was dead asleep when I saw him last, then I turned my back, and then Mr. Mysterious was gone. Strange isn't it?" 

_"Dead asleep…? He should have just been dead." _

_ "Sorry Amano? I didn't catch what you just said. Speak up, hon." _

Amano twitched again. His fist began to clench. He stared at the neighbouring hospital bed with enormous distaste, his imagination running freely with its wrath. He could imagine it now… that monstrous man… sleeping there playing innocent like a miserable little baby, dreaming of things that did not belong to him. This was _Amano's turf, this was his place of work and play, this was Amano's little sanctuary and damn that man for interfering! This was the very last resort Amano had managed to keep for himself, to hide away from the pestering insistence of that imaginary mongrel, but lo and behold that thief had snuck into his life and stolen all of Amano's valuables. That hideous person had just unknowingly come and screwed everything over; this was Amano's life! His life! That man had no right to just jar in wherever, and more than anything else Amano was furious about, that man had no right to just come in and figure Hitomi was all free for the taking. Amano loved Hitomi and she loved him in return and that's the way it was and should be and should have been for all of eternity! Amano was the one to comfort Hitomi when she cried, or be with her in her happy times. Amano was the one who had her sing-song laughter embedded in memory, her smiling eyes always in thought, and her name tattooed in his heart. Was that not important? Wasn't the gift of time precious to any of them? He didn't have the stinking right to push Amano aside however he pleased, for whatever reason or whatever purpose he knew Hitomi; it didn't deny the strong and solid fact that Amano and Hitomi did share something special. It was undeniable. Four years for the both of them and eight years overall was an incredibly long time growing up in a teenage love, who did he think he was to barge in and take away all that? And now after being close to destroying Amano's loving potential with Hitomi, now this overconfident man had enough nerve to prance around on Amano's territory? That guy was asking for trouble, and giving Amano enough doses of it at the same time. _

Suddenly, Amano's heart began to hurt – painfully. 

"Seriously, kid, I'm starting to think of sending you home," Kay began to voice her concern, clicking her tongue in disappointment to see Amano was vague again, but worse off than before. Before it had seemed only as if her student were caught in a daydream, a small mental wandering, but now his eyes were glowing and reflecting a much stronger passion. It was a side she had never seen, a persona that was not work-oriented in any way, not influenced by rational decisions or strategic measures, but based solely on the unpredictability of emotion. It was now igniting a flame within Amano that was spiteful yet sad at the same time. 

Amano felt dizzy. It reminded him intensely of last night – he was overwhelmed. Anger raged through his testosterone blood, yet a calling began to ache at him – his heart began to throb. Things began to sift through his brain, pounding and calling and arguing for his attention. He so felt like hurting someone, hurting whoever it was that was responsible for his pain… but at the same time he thought of soft things… his last four-year anniversary with Hitomi at Sunset Beach… the way everything had been once so perfect brought about countless sense of feelings unexplainable to the rampaging heart. He didn't know how to feel or react or more so he was doing a terrible job of hiding such confusion. 

His finger felt bare. 

Kaye studied him worried sick at his failure to respond, watching his eyes glower as if they saw something or as if he felt something that he couldn't enjoy and couldn't share. It was such an inwardly suffering, that Kaye could finally understand why he had come here at such demanding times in the first place – Amano wanted to escape. He had come here to seek refuge but for some reason what she had just mentioned earlier had brought about to him a worse sense of emotional confinement. It looked as if an entire transformation, it was as if Amano was not even remotely the same person he once had been. His eyes reflected the fact that he did not live and thrive along his work as he had done day after day before, but now his only concern was much more personal, much more intimate than it had ever been. With all that Amano had going for him, Kaye knew from a conversation with him from when she met him, that there was only one highly intimate subject that Amano had to be concerned about. 

Her eyes fell to his right hand. 

There lay four fingers followed by an opposing thumb, each bare and naked as well as his left hand's were also. They acted like an evident symbol of loneliness, unfamiliar to both Kaye and Amano. She studied those hands and stared at those eyes, feeling the pieces as if coming together, yet she could only wonder about what was missing. It was missing… so where was it? Just what had happened? What had occurred to her brightest student to fall into a bottomless well of depression? She desired to ask him so, to inquire about such unpredicted tragedies in his life, yet she felt there was no need for his question. The reasoning behind his sudden melancholic ways was already painted obvious by the tale told by his soul through his eyes. 

_"Answer me, Hitomi, you said you would." _

_"I… can't." _

_"I'm not going to go around in circles here, Hitomi please. Bear with me. You promised you would answer my question… for crying out loud, it's just yes or no!" _

_"Ama—" _

_"YES or NO Hitomi, that's all I'm asking for." _

_"I'm sorry." _

_"You're sorry? Is that an answer? I'm afraid not. Just fricking answer the question already." _

_"Amano, let go of me." _

_"You won't answer my question." _

_"Let go – now." _

_"Answer me – now." _

_"I'm not going to." _

_"NOT GOING TO?!? NO!?!?Is that the way it's going to be?" _

_"Amano—" _

_"Don't talk to me Hitomi! You're inability to answer has proven something to me, it's proven just how much you love this Van—" _

_"Amano, I—" _

_"If you want it this way, then fine. Here, take this." _

_"What? What's this? Your engagement ring? _

_"Yes it is, how very observant of you. You know what Hitomi, you can keep it." _

_"What? Why? Amano, can't we talk this out?"  
  
_

_"You obviously don't have what it takes to talk. I can't marry someone who can't _

_even—" _

_"Oh my God, Amano, don't tell me you're doing this to me!" _

_"Well, I am because you're doing what you're doing against me. So you know what? Until you feel that you actually 'want' this relationship of ours, you keep that ring until you have enough honesty to give it back to me." _

_"Oh my God, Amano… please don't do this…" _

_"Stop your crying. I gave all the chances you needed Hitomi." _

_"I'm sorry, I just don't know what's wrong with me!" _

_"And neither do I, so until you figure it out, the wedding is in your own hands… Goodbye, Hitomi." _

_"Amano, no… please no…!" _

_"Hitomi…goodbye." _

* * *

_Laugh and cry, live and die…  
Life is a dream we are dreaming… _

Pictures were not worth a thousand words. They were worth millions. She could sense that with each small and memorable photo that her eyes scanned over, frozen in the time of their taking, a time obviously worth recollecting in the image's eternal illustration of emotion and beauty. Some were not as well off as others however, for they were tattered near the edges or embedded with fading colours, due to the fact that Angela had never found the time to organize the hundreds of photos into any sort of classified albums, particularly because she knew it would take quite a few days that she didn't have to get all of such a mess arranged. But regardless of when or where they were taken or any such specific details, she had kept them all because each had meant something to her… each telling their own momentary story. Because the many pictures were simply gathered together in an empty cookie tin bin, the busy now single mother didn't have all of the time to take a stroll down memory lane whenever she pleased, and to be honest at this point she should have been doing just about anything else. 

Actually, Angela had just finished packing a second of Shied's suitcases. It had taken her a full hour, and that whole time, Angela's mind drew nothing but a blank. It was as if she folded clothing and wedged in notebooks without a trace of a thought, as if in her sleep, in complete avoidance from having to think of anything. It was true though; in order for her to keep herself together in a somewhat stable state, Angela just had to literally stop thinking. Otherwise, if she began to think, she'd begin to notice. If she began to notice, she'd begin to see. If she began to see, she'd realize how empty Shied's small room was becoming, how the scattered papers which were there for seemingly years were now hidden within one of the various boxes, where the piles of neat clothing now lay concealed as luggage, how the baseball cards were lost within packed knapsacks, and how posters and drawings were taken off the bedroom walls, leaving nothing but the imprint of their light shadows for her to remember them by. And if Angela began to see all this, then she'd begin to feel. And if she'd begin to feel, there would be nothing but a lonely pain to overwhelm. 

And that was what brought Angela to the pictures. They had remained within their living room tucked underneath a coffee table, pretty much untouched unless there were new photos to add to the collection. But still, to her, even though they had been there every day since, it only intrigued her to look at them today. That was only because she could not look at Shied's room, and now that she was done ensuring that all of his belongings were safe within his luggage, she could not look at those suitcases. There was an awful truth to them, a miserable aura that came to her when she thought of it, and so she didn't. Angela escaped to those pictures, those photos, to run away from the choking impressions she received from blank walls and curtain-less windows. She couldn't take it in there. She just couldn't. Or else her eyes would water, and her hands were shake, and she would wail in all of her self-pity. But Angela was a strong woman. She didn't do such feeble things, at least not anymore. She would fight this pain, even if it meant denying it, for as long as her weak little heart could bear. The blank room…. It was all as if a dream. She still heard his young laughter within it, and the soft beats of his music from his small portable stereo. She could still see the scattered clothing, hangers, dangling off doorknobs, curtains drawn for Casey's enjoyment, as a small breeze would blow in. She could still see these things. She could see them through the blur of the tears. 

_Day by day I find my way…  
Look for the soul and the meaning... _

The first picture – aged and forgotten, taken right at the turn of the 90s. She had been only 22, with her waist-long sandy blonde hair and a pale smile, gazing at the camera with uncertainty. It had been a painful uncertainty at the time, captured by the eerie lighting within the photograph, the way Angela's eyes had glazed over at the moment with thoughts and panic riding her life. It was back then when she had first started to piece her existence together. She had moved to Aimsa by the time she turned 19, with not much hope for any sort of a future, until the Birthright community of Japan had taken her in after discovering her very recent struggles with parental loss, high school dropouts, and abortion. At the age of twenty, Angela had become highly active with her Catholic church, and had decided that the young woman would now spend her life trying to compensate her mistakes. Managing to find her own apartment and to hold a steady job at Liquidation World, she had also taken on the role of countless volunteer hours at the Aimsa Children's Hospital, working with sick or injured children to a near to daily basis, as if taking them in as her own. Angela had felt as if it were the only thing she could possibly do to make up for abandoning her own child – by seeing that child's valuable spirit within every young girl and boy she encountered who needed her support and attention, by giving the only thing she could – love. 

_Then you look at me…  
And I always see…  
What I have been searching for… _

Then the series of children pictures began to follow, photos taken only a year ago, during the Aimsa Children's Hospital fundraiser week. It had been a time when dozens of volunteers would come in, sometimes expert chess players or pet owners or cookie bakers to the helpful ordinary, bringing anything they thought would paste a smile on a child's face as a televised telethon brought camera crews in and out. She gazed at each picture intently, the newer photographs, more accurate and more detailed. They were abundant – dozens of snapshots of smiling children, some with casts, some with crutches, some with scars, yet nonetheless they smiled brightly each grasping onto a stuffed animal that Angela had given them. Their smiles were honest and true, and all that Angela had so lived to seeing. It was a feeling of gratefulness for them and also for her, a feeling of completion, where she could for once look at her life to have aided rather than to have destroyed. It made every sacrifice worth the efforts.

Then the photographs stopped moving. Her hands came to a pause in their shuffling, after having passed by smile after smile, one came to her immediate attention. Fighting to keep her frail hands from trembling, her breath could only fall short as she gazed at the crystal eyes watching her from the within the priceless photograph.

_I'm lost as can be…  
Then you look at me…  
And I am not lost anymore. _

Irises of sapphire blue, bangs of a wispy blonde, figure of a young boy with an expression of total innocence, curiousity and intrigue written upon his face. That was exactly what stared back at Angela, a picture handled and looked at many times before, but each time it was as if the picture were anew, as if she had never seen it prior to that moment when she'd hold it in her hand once again. It was a Polaroid, and somewhat dim, reminding Angela that she been meaning to get this picture enhanced when she could. Of all the images that had ever befallen her eyes throughout the course of her life, that picture, that one lone dim and blurred picture was the best of them all. It was everything to her, because it showed everything that was everything to her, in its most simple of ways. In a dim hospital room, a bit more than a year ago, it had been that very day when she had first met that young boy. In this photo, he cradled within his arms a gray, stuffed cat, plastic whiskers slightly frayed and eyes having lost their once brand-new luster, but yet he had liked it so much when she had shown it to him, that she had immediately allowed it to keep it. He had explained, in his inquisitive and polite yet timid voice, that they had no such thing where he was from. He had told her many things then about where he was from, and about how much it was different from where he was now. Although what he said seemed strange to her, she never questioned it, for in her eyes he was a child, and she knew he was a child of truth. It had been then, sitting there on his bedside, telling him about the hospital and how she helped out children, and listening to him tell her about many thing of his life, and about how she was so beautiful in the way that she looked just like his mother did. It had been a small inkling to her to ask about this child, to ask what everyone wondered about him, such as where he was from, where were his parents, and how he planned to return home. But he was a mystery child, and Angela had known that she could not just walk out of that door leaving him be as a mystery, an unsolved puzzle. For just sitting by him, talking with him, Angela was placing those pieces together. She saw the purity, the humanity behind this boy, and it reached out to her. It called to her like a child called to a mother, like melancholy called to comfort. It consumed everything else she thought about, but most of all, it gave Angela a meaning. This was a lost child, as she was a lost woman. It had been then that she had decided that, no matter the burdens or the hurdles to be leapt over, together, they would not be lost anymore.

_People run, sun to sun…  
Caught in their lives ever flowing…_

Everything had been a hassle from day one. Angela was not normally the stronghold of anything; she didn't go about taking responsibility of things she didn't have to. Perhaps that was why she had dropped out of high school, or allowed her trash boyfriend to take advantage of her, or had neglected the responsibility of the child that she was to bear, or ran off to another country to escape everything that had gone wrong, but it had been that same day when all of those qualities filled with a dreaded fear to commitment or being deserted was set aside. It was a waking call to Angela, one that forced her to take a stand, to voice her own opinion, and to fight her own battle. She wouldn't get that boy, that blessed gift to her, without a struggle. But in her mind, for the first time focused in determination, she knew that this was something she wouldn't back down on. She knew the odds and the circumstances, and she knew she had what it took to beat it all. It was Angela's debt to society, to life, to herself, and to this lost child. And that was the way of mind Angela lived with since then; a lifestyle of designating priorities, of budgeting, of planning, of teaching and learning. She grew from a lost young lady to a woman in a matter of a day. Things kind of evolved from there, and the relationship, as expected, grew stronger. Though her apartment was not large, though her professions were not extraordinary, somehow, they got by. That young boy was no longer a stranger to her, nor was he a mystery. He was Shied to her, Shied Schezar. It was the only the two of them most of the time, as they went on their own little outings together, such as adopting Casey, visiting museums to Shied's interest, trekking through landmarks, and even little things like when they'd work together with Shied's projects or assignments. But it wasn't like he needed much help anyway, the boy was very clever, and he grew to like school rather easily. Shied had said that he preferred not to get particularly close to any of his classmates so that he wouldn't have to keep lying about his past to them, but Angela knew that the friendly boy had many friends there too. They liked Shied, because he took an interest in everything. If someone liked soccer, Shied would love to hear all about it, for he knew nothing of the game. If someone else liked a particular television show, he would get involved in the conversation as well, for Shied was new to everything. He held no judgments, like a tiny babe born to the world of the Mystic Moon. Frankly, Angela was quite convinced that Shied was beginning to take an interest in the young ladies as well, for he was already eleven, and besides that, Shied wasn't used to be able to associate with just any girl he pleased. On Gaea, he was obliged only to marry those with royal blood, and to associate only with females, in an affectionate manner, of particular high class. The freedom of the Mystic Moon and also its very realistic hardships intrigued the boy. He was the cleverest little thing she had ever seen.

_Once begun, life goes till it's gone…  
We have to go where it's going… _

How did fourteen months pass so quickly? The snapping of her fingers would have seemed longer, in comparison to this blissful yet awfully short time. Who was she kidding herself, trying to deny what was to happen today? Why did she avoid it so desperately? Why was she running again? Why was she trying to escape, like she had when she was younger? Angela Ferentini was a strong woman now, was she not? She had even told him, young Shied, to pretend today as if it were any other. She had done so, and he had done so, for so long, but it was foolish! This day was not like any other! Shied's walls were bare, his belongings were packed… _he was leaving. _

_ She placed the photo down abruptly, ignoring the water build up within her eye ducts, trying not to think of it, escaping once again. Instead, she decided to think of something else but something relatively close – the thought of whom Shied would be leaving to. She had never mused over it much, because she didn't think it was a topic that needed much thinking. From what she knew of Shied's many stories about his parents on Gaea, she found them entirely credible people… but now, she decided to think about that a bit more. She didn't want to contemplate on the fact that her baby would be leaving her, and it hadn't hit home just yet. But she thought in advance to where'd he'd be going, to whom would take her place once he was gone. She couldn't say that she quite outclassed Shied's parents on that other planet, for his father was a prestige knight, and his foster mother was a princess for crying out loud, the direct sister of Shied's biological mother. It went without saying that Shied, being a young prince himself about to be crowned as Duke of an entire nation, was well off where he came from. She didn't have to worry about him not getting the proper education, or clothing or food. They could do a thousand times better at raising Shied financially than she could ever accomplish in a lifetime. But it wasn't that which Angela was concerned about. There was only thing that really came to bother her – did they love Shied as much as she did? Neither of them were Shied's first parents, and in a sense, nobody was Shied's "first parent". His real mother Marlene Aston had died when he was at such an early age, and he had been given to the Duke of Frade to be raised since his birth was an illegitimate one, and he could not be raised by Allen for that would most definitely scar his reputation. It was only until Allen Schezar be wedded Milerna Aston, did they ever even tell Shied about the fact that Allen was actually his biological father. Only then did they decide to take him into their custody, welcoming the young prince into an even more royal family, bounded by royal ties. No matter what way Angela looked at it, from each and every direction, the way things had came to be just didn't look loving at all. It almost seemed as if Shied were bounced around, juggled from family to family, as if at first he would be nothing but a political burden, but only until after the boy established a respectable standing in society, did they come to accept him again. It was as if his entering the Aston and Schezar relationship on the whim were like for political aid, as if Shied could always serve as a peace agreement between the nations of Frade and Asturia, which normally never had gotten along. What was Shied to them then? Just a pile of human contract? It was insulting to Angela, and though she knew that chances were that was very wrong on her theory about them not loving Shied, Angela still knew but one thing for certain: She'd always love him more._

_And you say you see…  
When you look at me…  
The reason you love life so…  
Though lost I have been…  
I find love again…  
And life just keeps on running… _

"Mum?"

Her breath left her a second time, the water welling in her eyes returned. A thousand emotions surged through her at once, at a force she couldn't react to. Angela knew then that he had been watching her, observing her in his usual astounded silence. She knew then that as she had stared at him, he had been staring at her in return.

"Mum…" his voice was gentle; his raincoat zipped up halfway, sneakers lazily tied on, of which she would lecture him upon, baseball cap placed upon his head. He wore a smile, a forced smile. He was still pretending as if everything were just fine.

"I… I think it's time to go."

She watched him blankly, as if his words didn't register, as if his false positive attitude was one she couldn't believe. She could see right through her son in every way. He ached in the same way as she.

"Shied honey, stop pretending," She rushed the words, trying not to choke upon them, turning to face him as she struggled to see through the blur.

"What do you mean?" He cocked his head sideways, intuitive, trying so earnestly to hide such emotion, trying to make this day less painful than they all knew it reallly was.

She felt herself cringe. She hated sadness. She wanted to escape – but couldn't any longer.

"Honey baby, come here."

Shied did as he was told, wondering yet obedient, not questioning for he knew it was not a time for questions.

Angela's arms embraced Shied quickly, holding him close as any mother would, running her slim fingers through his hair, fine like silk, feeling his skin as smooth as an infant's, his warmth as soothing as with a loved one.

"I took a life a long time ago," she said it in a whisper, in shame of what she had done. "He was a very young boy, Shied. He was so very young," her tears began to fall, dripping downwards, slow and chilling, "And he was innocent just like you Shied. He would have been just a few years older than you now if I hadn't stolen that life away. But in every way, Shied, you are that life. You are my son, Shied, to me you are. But I can't deny it anymore… I can't deny that you're leaving me today."

The embrace grew tighter, tears falling more abundantly.

"But you're not denying anything," he began to argue, voice quivering yet strong. "You can't deny it because I am your son, Mum, I was meant to be your son and I always will be! I'll never leave you!! I am your son!"

His voice was strong, their embrace was soft, his words were touching, and her heart was touched. There was no reply, for there was no use for one. There was only but the sweet silence. Nothing more than a simple sweet silence abounding in love as they gazed at each other through the soft tears in their eyes, nothing more than a mother and her son.

_You look at me and life comes from you._

* * *

A lecture. 

It was unavoidable and entirely predictable, easily foreshadowed in everything that was everything. She felt she was much too old for lectures. She was twenty after all, and how many twenty-year-olds deal with such verbal abuse and ignorance from a biased and totally uninformed mother? She didn't exactly know the answer to that question, yet she did now that for the past twenty years, Hitomi had been undergoing nearly thousands of the repetitive annoyance of her mother's long and dreaded speeches on how one is to behave and act in life as if she were some omniscient deity to happen to know that much about what's right and what's wrong. A child may be a little more susceptible to such treatment, and even she bore the lectures with patience during her argumentative adolescent years, but now was different. Hitomi Kanzaki was a full-fledged adult now. She sustained her own self, paid her own debts, cooked her own food and slept under her own roof, so other than Hikoro Kanzaki having maternal rights over her, Hitomi found that her mother had no other level of authority either than that, but apparently, that feeling was anything but mutual Apparently, her mother felt that somehow, someway, she still controlled Hitomi's every breath and movement and her little daughter was nothing but a mislead and confused little soul. And also apparently, in this time of times where everything fortunate collapsed upon itself, a lecture was something that Hitomi only anticipated to harshly retaliate against. 

Hikoro did not share her daughter's trait of a tall height, which Hitomi had obtained from Paul, her father. Although Hikoro's oriental blood kept her relatively shorter than her own daughter, the look of anger and frustration surpassed the limits of size. It had only taken her moments to arrive, the drive from her home to Hitomi's not being very long, but she knew that Hitomi would be prepared for her. Prepared in the sense that the young and mislead woman did nothing but sulk pitifully in a dining chair, avoiding eye contact with Hikoro to every possible extent. Although Yukari and Catherine were abounding with happy greetings towards her, and even though San – whom had accompanied Hikoro – was given a smile by the resentful Hitomi, it was as if there were a mute silence between Hitomi and herself. It seemed that all of the "words" that had been shared earlier on over the phone were quite enough in themselves. 

"Hitomi," Hikoro sat herself on the adjacent chair, keeping her voice soft and placid, figuring it was the most she could do in order to get some sort of cooperation from her only child. Blinking softly, she gazed at Hitomi's hands. They were firmly clenched and tight, knuckles nearly white, stating that the girl hadn't fully recovered from their earlier dispute, and that within her resided an abounding anger towards Hikoro. Not only that, but each finger was as bare as the other. Apparently, Amano wasn't the only one who was ring-less. 

Yukari bit her lip, giving a sigh as she escaped towards the kitchen. She had been watching the tense moment for quite some time, flashing Catherine unsure and tentative glances. They had both discussed, while Hitomi and Hikoro were on the phone earlier, that if worse came to worse and Mrs. Kanzaki would end up coming to pay them a visit, they would somehow try to retain a civilized manner between the two. They had failed to do that during the past little phone debate however, where Hitomi had nearly shrieked into the receiver in total infuriation at her own mother. Cathy and Yukari could only watch, wondering how the conversation had gotten so heated, to the point where in merely seconds Hitomi had slammed the phone so hard against the wall a permanent dent was left as a reminder. The phone itself lay in terrible shape, quite like the alarm radio a day earlier, as was the paled and unstable Hitomi, whom hadn't uttered a word to the two of her closest companions since then. It was apparent by the uncomfortable silence that her mother would be coming by – the least of the things that Hitomi would want to occur or need to occur – but it was anything but apparent as to what the two desperate friends would do about the ordeal. 

"This is going all wrong," The young roommate sighed in complete exasperation, voice isolated from the hearing of Hikoro or Hitomi from within the kitchen, of which herself and Yukari had spent most of the morning mulling over what it was they should do. Cathy's voice sounded nothing but tired and worn out, feeling drained of energy at all that had happened and what would come to inescapably happen later on. She allowed her weight to collapse on the cool feel of the refrigerator, weaving her long braid continuously around her fingers as she did when she was anxious, that and cleaning, but her home now gave a gleaming sparkle and she figured relieving her stress wasn't worth having to buy five new cleansing agents all because she had used up the ones she currently had in this totally unrelated situation. But Cathy did understand that the true magnitude of this predicament wasn't really affecting her directly, yet it still somehow managed to consume both herself and Yukari, manifesting more problems as time went on. 

"Care to inform me on what's going on, guys? I mean… like… " 

San watched Catherine. San watched Yukari. They both looked horrid, or at least as horrid as one can look on an early weekend morning. San did admit that she too wasn't elaborately prepared for an outing at the moment, having been suddenly dragged along by her aunt-in-law, but she didn't seem nor feel as offset as these two girls looked to be. It was odd to her, not because she wasn't aware of the problem at hand (San wasn't _that ignorant) but because just last night everything had been so blissfully perfect! Today had been their pre-planned girls day out! On the drive home with Catherine and Yukari, things had been so carefree and easygoing. It was a happy time, with weddings in the future and friendly family-filled gatherings on mind, but then somehow, someway, everything exploded in a frenzy of confusion and wandering angst over a period of one night! It seemed unimaginable to her, that something so faultless could go so awfully wrong in such a short amount of time. It was all as if a nightmare. _

Yukari gave a faint smile towards Hitomi's tall and inquiring cousin, who always seemed so aloof. It was like she deflected everything bad and depressing and somehow managed to salvage a happy-go-lucky attitude that got the best of her at times. She brushed a straight strand of brown behind her ear, keeping her weight against the counter, taking a sideways glance out the kitchen door to where Hikoro and Hitomi still sat. 

"You _did hear the argument that they got into on the phone, didn't you San?" _

"Well, not really," Hitomi's pondering cousin replied honestly, leaning her weight against the counter as well while playing with a spare sugar packet within her hand to keep up with distractions. "When I heard that Hikoro's tone was starting to get a little more serious and personal between the two, I went over to the washroom so it wouldn't look like I was eavesdropping or anything. But even then, I could still kind of hear her yelling. It was that bad, huh?" 

Yukari could only smirk unhappily, recollecting it, giving a glance towards Catherine. Unlike San, the two of them hadn't decided to let Hitomi alone to argue with her mother over the telephone. They hadn't stopped Hitomi either, but had just kind of observed her trying to pick up on what the two Kanzaki women were arguing so furiously about. It had been no longer than five minutes, but those minutes were stressed and grueling. 

"This is all because of last night," Cathy sighed, stating the obvious of what the three girls did know about the ordeal. 

"So does Aunt Hikoro know everything about what happened between Hitomi and Amano? You were there when Hitomi and Amano got in the argument, right Cath?" 

"No, not really," Catherine turned to face San. "When I had arrived, Amano was just on the way out and took his car keys from me after I drove you two home in his Bentley. I doubt Ms. Kanzaki knows exactly what happened last night, as we don't know anything much about it either. But I figure that's what she's here to find out." 

"Let me warn you guys now," Yukari cut in from no where, hesitantly glancing out the doorway, spotting Hikoro trying to talk to her daughter while Hitomi remained stalk still and purposely inattentive. "I've known those two for an awful long time, and I know what they're like when they don't get along, and it is beyond ugly. The scary part is, this is probably the worst thing that could happen. Hitomi was finally starting to grow some trust in Ms. Kanzaki again. I mean, she had willingly decided to appoint her mother as Maid of Honor. I really thought they'd start getting along. This is really going to mess things up between them for the wedding." 

"What wedding?" Cathy eyed Yukari doubtfully. "The way things are going, I don't know how likely it is that there will even _be a wedding." _

"But there's got to be!" Yukari's eyebrows furrowed in worry. She had been quite anxious about what was happening for quite some time, but a thought like the wedding being totally cancelled had never even crossed her mind. "This is Amano and Hitomi we're talking about here Catherine! I mean, it's not like they can just stop their friendship and go on with life. They've known each other for like -- forever. I don't think it'd be like either of them to call it off after all this time of planning." 

"Maybe not," Catherine Corain only hesitantly agreed. "But they can easily postpone it at this rate. I mean, it's down to just three weeks Kari, down flat to the wire. I hate to say it, but if they're getting into these conflicts now, it's best they hold it off rather than marrying with resentments to each other." 

Yukari bit her lip. She didn't like the tone of Catherine's words, the negativity towards Hitomi's and Amano's nearly "perfect" relationship as she saw it, but Cathy had a very direct point. Although Yukari felt that in her long life with Amano and Hitomi, things had always had a close-flowing rhythm and pattern, she had to admit that the occurrences of these problems threw that rhythm entirely offbeat. She wanted so desperately to think of it as a "forgive and forget" situation, where Amano would come crawling back to Hitomi or vice versa, but it just _didn't seem likely. There was a strong and undeniable presence of mistrust between the two of them. It wasn't something that could be resolved very easily, never mind if in the matter of a few weeks, assuming that it would even be resolved. _

"Hold on, let's back track here," San looked absolutely confused. The way Yukari and Catherine were talking of things made everything look so dreadful and horribly tied together, when just before everything had seemed so synchronized and flawless. "So you guys are saying that Aunt Hikoro and Hitomi don't actually get along?" 

Yukari managed a faint smile, "They have been lately, which is probably why you presumed that they do get along, and I admit, it's been going great between the two of them this past year." 

"Yeah, I was meaning to ask that," Catherine turned towards Yukari. "Hikoro's come by to visit Hitomi a few times, like when she and her bought Hitomi's wedding gown, and they got along just fine! But it wasn't always like that?" 

"Never," the highlighted reddish brunette shook her head, quite confident in her answer. She felt that in the entire world and probably beyond that, she was one of the closest people to Hitomi, as Hitomi was one of the closest people to her. Yukari had always known that Hitomi had strived so earnestly to please her mother, but she had also known that Hitomi was always angered that Hikoro would set her standards so high, to a point that Hitomi just couldn't reach. 

"Hitomi's always been alienated from Ms. Kanzaki," Yukari explained quite quietly, keeping her voice to a timid hush. "They're similar in many ways. I don't know if you know this, but a lot of Hitomi's psychic qualities actually came from Ms. Kanzaki's bloodline." 

"Psychic qualities?" Catherine couldn't help but allow an eyebrow to rise. 

"Yeah," San decided to explain, finally relieved that she would know something before someone else, for once. "Hitomi used to do a lot of fortune telling, and she was good at it too," San looked towards Yukari, "but wasn't it Hikoro that stopped her from doing it?" 

"Um hum, in a way," Hitomi's best friend nodded. "Hito kind of personally gave it up too, but her mother was still really strict on it after Hitomi's disappearance and return in and around tenth grade. Hito's held a sort of separation towards her mother ever since her father died. When Ms. Kanzaki had lied to Hitomi for several months about her father's move to Seattle, instead of just telling her that her father didn't make it, Hitomi just had that burdened in her heart for years. Hikoro should have definitely told her the truth." 

"But that would have crushed her! She was only like ten at the time," San argued defensively, recalling her own mother's tears towards the death of her Uncle Paul. 

"I know it would have, as it would have equally hurt Hikoro to say such a thing, but it'd be the same for any of us. I'd rather deal with the pain when it comes, instead of having someone else twist the truth only to let me know about it later on. But after Hitomi had gone through the disappearance, or the Time, she just never acted the same way again towards her mom. I guess it was the psychiatric sessions that really ticked her off; I would be pretty angry too if my mom took me out of school thinking I was crazy. That was rock bottom of their relationship for sure, and lately it's only been uphill from there. But I don't know about now…" 

Catherine Corain nodded, feeling the big picture coming slowly into sharp focus after having been blurred for such a long time. She was starting to see how incredibly fragile all of these relationships actually were. Funny, that at the first introduction to these various characters and all of their dramatic situations, everything just seems so right! Hitomi seems like the pleasant young woman – considerate, calm and sensible. And then there was Amano, being the perfect gentlemen, with high status in society, apparently a family man… Yukari, the perfect best friend…Hikoro, the providing mother of encouragement and support… it had _seemed that way for an awful long time but all along there was an unsightly truth behind it all that only a select few actually knew about. There was Hitomi's estranged past, Hikoro's love bordered by conditions, Amano's close-mindedness to his fiancée's mentality and even Yukari's attraction to her best friend's to-be-wed husband. It was much more cluttered and entangled than Catherine could ever conceive, but as Hitomi and Hikoro sat only a few feet away, she had a feeling that there was no choice but for it to all unravel now. _

* * * 

"I'm still sorry that I couldn't get to prepare you guys any kinda decent dinner," a young Angela sighed, after having prodded a fork into a tiny excuse of a baked potato. It was totally undercooked in her opinion, and she felt entirely hesitant to eat in this nearly empty place, occupied by one unmindful waitress filing her nails off by the counter, and muffled 80's music constantly interrupted by static in an old diner right off the freeway, neon lights flickering and surrounded by a web of entangled moths. "But by the time I could get anything respectable cooked, I'm afraid we'd be running off schedule." 

"Are you kidding?" A young cat-lady, long lengths of ears hidden by volumes of cherry-pink hair, only gazed at her from across the table, mouth agape in surprise, setting aside the salt and pepper shaker she had previously been amused with. "I truly adore your cooking there, Ms. Ferentini, I really do! But I gotta say I'm glad to have gotten to eat at this place. Their fries are delicious! Just like yours… but wetter." 

Van smiled softly staring sideways at his companion, who constantly gazed out of the large restaurant windows where dusk had immediately started to settle. The stop by the diner on the way to the base had been totally unplanned, but with Merle and Shied's stomach grumbles, Angela didn't think a little detour could hurt for one last treat. Before Merle laid the usual half-eaten mounds of food, as Merle, like any cat, was a terribly finicky eater, instead finding more interest in napkin holders or paper place mats with meal advertisements. She had already taken eons longer than the rest of them to select a meal from the menu, having hurried only to Van's reminder that they were eating on a tight schedule. However, the fish sticks as well as the fries were finally long gone, having satisfied the girl's picky yet vast appetite for Mystic Moon fast food. 

"Wetter?" Angela Ferentini let out a bright laugh, along with Shied who sat alongside on the opposite side of the table, trying not to join in too much to keep from sputtering the coke he was presently drinking out his nose, grinning and shaking his head. 

Merle perked up a bit at Angela's ringing chuckle, quite relieved to hear sign of happiness within the four since they had left the Ferentini residence about an hour and a half ago, embodied in this intimidating realm of seriousness. Merle wasn't a child, she understood that there were some times that didn't involve jokes or grins, but she didn't want to see this day being one of them. It had been tense enough as it was, and very busy too with countless checks and rechecks to see that everything was accomplished and accounted for, so she felt it was only natural if not necessary to have some light-hearted times to let loose, rather than always having to be plagued with worries of what was to come or what would be forgotten. However, she still felt somewhat confused, eyeing a slab of charbroiled beef on Van's plate, practically oozing in a translucent puddle. 

"I don't get it, what's so funny? I mean… it's kinda soaked to me." She wiggled her feline nose, allowing the alluring scent of Van's meal waft towards her – steak, fried rice and macaroni casserole. As appealing as it smelt, the meat still looked as if it were a sponge. 

"Oh Merle, you are so incredibly darling," Angela smiled finally settling in from her amusement, lying back on the faded cushion of the couch-like dining bench. "Don't get me wrong, it's just that I'm not so used to people asking such cute questions, since Shied here likes to pretend he knows more than I do." 

"Hah," Shied scoffed jokingly, dabbing his mouth with a clean napkin in an act of overacted prestige. "Well, I bet _you _didn't read four issues of the Britannica encyclopedia in under two weeks, now did you?"

"Well, I dun think I have to to know what the wet stuff is that Merle is referring to," Angela replied snottily back to her beloved son, yet with a secret smile and a teasing ring to her voice, as they had usually joked when things felt more laid back. Merle was right on the fact that these times were most definitely tense – emotional. So all the more, Angela was grateful for this sudden moment of ease. She turned back to Merle pointing at the "puddle" on Van's plate, in which the meat seemingly floated upon. "It's grease honey. Always happens in places like these. Don't want to get too much of that in ya, it adds quite nicely to the calories."

"I see…" Merle nodded smiling, yet still totally aloof as to what 'grease' actually was or what purpose it served, or what on earth 'calories' were supposed to be. But she liked the food, whether it was fatty or not, or swimming in unidentifiable liquids. Back at the hotel, she had loved being exposed to the fast food that Van would bring back to her, and the home-cooked style that Angela had occasionally stirred up for them when her and Shied would visit, but it was different to her, much different to be out and eating food in a totally new environment eating from a totally different menu, and a whole other part of town. It was fairly empty, which was a good thing although Merle's "human disguise" was pretty effective in hiding her less human features, but sometimes she wished that there were more people, for Merle always loved to observe the citizens of this world, as she had been doing often from the view of the hotel balcony. It was hard to believe that she wouldn't be seeing the world, this world, from that view anymore, from seven floors high, or skyscrapers stretching to the clouds, or traffic jams in the winding streets for a long length of time that she couldn't quite predict. On that balcony or in front of that mystical "television", it almost felt as if Merle was sitting stock-still in a glimpse of the near future of Gaea. It now felt as if she had blinked for just a moment, and that glimpse was long gone.

"You're happy here, aren't you?" Surprisingly, Van joined into the conversation, sipping quietly on a glass of water and observing Merle as she continued to watch a car slither by on the fast lanes on the opposite side of the window far ahead. All of them had had a sense of silence this day, one that was abnormal from their usual upbeat attitudes together, but it seemed that Merle still held an enthusiasm to the world, as if she was winning the struggle to retain a happiness even if there was to be an inevitable sadness soon to come. He wasn't surprised at all. Knowing Merle, when all was down, she'd be the last one left still looking upwards.

"Happy?" Merle suddenly stared to Van, stared at him intently nearly thrilled to hear his voice so willingly speak. She had been nervous, as the others, to begin conversation with him, for he was so very secret now. He had been secret ever since last night.

"Of course I'm happy!" She suddenly exclaimed the words, trying not to think of her suspicion towards him, trying not to think of the whys and the what's and the where's behind her thoughts towards him, behind the wound he bore, behind the hostility he so sullenly showed. Instead, she put those things aside, for she was not going to be caught prisoner in this global state of depression. Instead, content with the food she had eaten and the opportunity of being with those she cared for, she looped her arm around Van's and lay her head upon his shoulder, shutting her eyes and blocking all negative thoughts out. There wasn't anything negative with her Van.

"I'm happy Van. I'm finally out here, with you. I'm happy."

Van nearly choked on what should have been a harmless substance – water – in total surprise to Merle's sudden decision of affection. He shakily clanged the glass back down upon the table surface, finally catching his breath as he felt the sudden warm presence of her cheek upon his shoulder, eyes rested closed and furry hand resting on his forearm. His handsome dark eyes, hidden behind bangs of hair, black bags underneath after having lacked sleep from both emotional and physical pain, lit in a sudden familiarization to Merle's unconditional care towards him. She had given so much effort the night before; having watched over him from a distance, her feline eyes worried yet his voice was mute. He loved her so, his ineffable best friend, but his mind was yet so troubled, and his heart so wrenched, that he didn't want her sympathy – or anyone else's for that matter. He had thought that such treatment towards her would make her less interested in him, would make her cold towards his own distantness, would eventually come to result on her giving up in his bitter personality. It wasn't that he desired such a thing, but because he felt he couldn't act any happier, and words just couldn't escape him to explain on his behalf. And so, that was what credited to his sudden surprise that Merle still bore the same expression of fondness, a possibly even more loving expression, despite the way he had treated the lot of them. It made him realize his ungrateful attitude towards his friends, which tore him so inside.

"Ain't that just cute…" Angela let out a soft admiring sigh, watching the two with a subtle smile as she stirred her coffee softly. She allowed her eyes to drift also to Shied, who smiled in return to see Van's sudden involvement with the three of them. It was hard enough to stir up conversation as it was, but it was even more difficult to say anything addressed to the king of Fanelia. Van spoke of course when it was necessary or polite, as to compliment Angela for the bounteous meal she had cooked that morning, or simply apologizing for all the trouble he had caused at the Ramada and so forth after giving a very brief explanation of the mysterious occurrences, which still lay beyond shadows. He sure wasn't behaving the way the young gentleman usually did, and almost always looked as if he were suffering from some sort of physical bother, but still everyone kept their distance, everyone but the one person who couldn't – Merle.

"Don't you think they make such a cute couple?" Angela hushed over to Shied quietly, just out of the mentioned two's earshot, smiling and winking a tad bit.

"Ah, Mum, don't start up with _that _again," Shied groaned chidingly, recalling their debate on the topic about a week ago. "I already explained to you – it's never going to happen between those two. They're practically brother and sister for crying out loud! Muum, that's gross!"

Angela let out a quiet laugh, having predicted such a response from her son. She loved to think of him that way – her son – as she had been so fondly doing so after their moment together right before they had departed to their venture to the 'base'.

"Well, I think you're only defending those two because you have a little crush on Merle yourself, now don't you?"

Shied nearly came close to spitting out a mouthful of shish kebob, giving his mother a roll-of-the-eye glare. "Mother, please! She's four Earth years older than me, I can't believe you'd even think it."

"Ha," Angela brushed it off. "You won't even notice the age difference after a few years."

"Mother, no."

"Oh c'mon…"

"Uh unh."

"You know you like—"

Then suddenly Angela was abruptly interrupted.

One of the most momentous statements was suddenly stated for the night, to lead to one of the most tumultuous conversations to be spoken, when all strain was to be revealed:

"Will you miss this place, Lord Van?" 

It was a simple question, not so very intricate or problematic, but yet it came entirely unexpected and unprepared for. That one phrase, all alone in its innocent self, became the key to a strange door left unopened. It burdened an immediate silence upon them all, in the quick sense that smiles were stolen off faces, sounds muted from being voiced, with the exception of the neon buzz and the crackling radio, all was quiet and taut in an unyielding suspense.

Van felt his chest tighten once more, once again surprised by Merle's abrupt decisions, yet this time he wasn't so certain for whether it was astonishment for the better or for the worse. He felt his voice caught all over again, unable to escape with words that couldn't come to exist, for he barely had a clue on what to think. It was a simple question, one that may have been more easy to answer just a few days ago without a mere backtrack in thought, but now, it almost felt as if she were prying into things he didn't want her to know, for he was secret now. But with the way she had addressed him the way he missed, and the way she treated him with kindness in the way that he had missed from the old times, he knew that just like the old times, he had to let go of secrets.

"There are plenty of things to miss Merle… this… this is a great place to be."

Merle nodded in agreement, feeling Van's arm become rigid – he still wasn't ready to speak so freely just yet, but Merle could not bear to wait. She hated it. She hated how she was left in the dark, how she couldn't understand him, how it wasn't as easy to read it usually was. Sure, it was true that Merle didn't act this "close" to him anymore, sure it was true that she had purposely decided to simply call him by his first name and omit all fancy-shmancy titles, but it wasn't true that those things were signs that she was denying her care for him, and now she fought to make that evident. She _did _care for him; so much so that it tore her very soul to have seen him last night, suffering in numerous counts of pain, yet keeping it all to an uncooperative silence that she couldn't penetrate yet couldn't live with. She couldn't bear watching him tear himself apart inside. She couldn't stand to watch him live in secret, and thus, she would continue to be persistent.

"What will you miss most?"

Angela swallowed, and drank down her coffee uncomfortably. Keeping her eyes locked onto the paper cup it was within. She was observant of the situation yet remained out of it, feeling it was awkward enough without her need to make it even less stable. She couldn't exactly understand what Merle's intentions were with such little, if any, consideration to Van Fanel's privacy, but she could only hope that it wouldn't increase any emotional tension already existing between the four.

Van sighed, pulling up the collars of the long, knee-length trench coat he hadn't worn in a long while, ever since back in March… ever since that night. He ruffled a hand into his hair, refusing to answer right away and sighing instead with distaste. He wanted to signify to his friend that it wasn't the time for such things to be answered, but he had a strong feeling that she was already aware of his discomfort in being straightforward, which was why she targeted the sensitive subject so intensely.

"There are plenty of things to miss. I don't know what I'll miss most. Can we get on with this?"

Merle lifted her head softly, conscious now that Van was not willing to cooperate as she had hoped. But there was a drive in her, an unanswered calling, and she was not going to leave this world until there were no more doubts to linger like a bad odour. She couldn't stand the thought of prolonging either a depressive mood towards their departure, or a synthetic happiness that thus added to depression. She wanted all to be known, so that each feeling that was felt was genuine and mutual and natural.

"No Van," she said the words kindly, yet directly, hoping that they'd be strong-willed enough so that they wouldn't be easily dismissed. She could see the two spectators watching in uneasiness from across the table, feeling a little guilty for having to involve them in her intimidating demands of the most difficult character of the group, but she had no other choice. She knew that they wanted to know exactly what was up with Van just as much as she did.

"Tell me Van," she looked to him directly, unblinking of course, since her feline blood allowed her to blink much less than regular humans. He returned the glare, although with a bit of resent in his beautiful claret eyes, possibly feeling a bit disgraced or embarrassed or even exposed.

"Tell us please what we've been patient to find out – Van, just tell us what happened last night." Her plea, her demand, was blunt and straightforward and directly to the point. She had phrased it in the only way she knew that he wouldn't be able to writhe out of so easily. It was rude – yes, but she felt it her need all the same.

Van let out a sharp exhale; knowing her request would be coming but liking it no better. He shrugged off her hand immediately, feeling suddenly at odds with her, as if disturbed that she would disregard what he wanted to keep for himself, her feeling as if it was something that she had the right to make public – which of course she had no such right, no matter how good of friends they were. Or at least that's what he currently believed.

"Merle that's quite enough," His demand was blunt and straightforward and directly to the point – tone matching hers in every which way – cut and dry. The strain that was already so tedious became even harder to bear as tension increased. "We already discussed what happened last night. I talked to the four of you about it, isn't that right Shied?"

Shied looked upwards suddenly, surprised to have been so suddenly brought into the conversation nearly dropping his fork, but managing to catch it in time. He had been discreetly studying what was going on between his two comrades, yet it was like watching a movie and being the audience, never expecting to actually be dragged into the ongoing action. He couldn't help but wonder if it was Van's efforts to try and get all of the attention off his shoulders.

"Yes, uh, I do remember most of what you said. You mentioned that there was an incident that happened at the Ramada and uh.. you uh.. got hurt," if it were hot enough, beads of sweat would have started to build upon Shied's soft forehead for he felt anxious all over, trying to fill in the blanks from the little that Van had told them the night before. He knew that him and his Mum were just as clueless and as curious as to what exactly had happened to Van as Merle was, so he couldn't quite securely stand for Van's defense. "… then… um... that woman, the detective woman, helped bring you back to my place after you guys left the hospital…"

"Yep, that's all you told us," Angela helped out the frazzled Shied, confirming with a solid tone that Van hadn't told them of very much at all. She didn't expect to find herself fighting for Van's secretive cause so much, for her instincts told her that something important had occurred the night before, and Van was disrespecting them all by keeping it entirely to himself. Moreover, he was insulting the trust that Merle had so faithfully rooted in him by ignoring her needs the way he did.

"That's all you need to know." Van declared hastily, striving to keep his tone from growing bitter, and avidly avoiding eye contact. He didn't want to appear too resentful, but it was as difficult a task as like a worm trying to be appreciative to the science student that so openly dissects it.

"No, not really," Merle was just as flat to the point as Van was, not trying to avoid eye contact with him, but more so trying to gain it. He was looking for every wormhole in order to slip out of this situation for whatever reason, but she wasn't as apt to letting it all drop as he was.

"How about this detective woman," she began her further inspection despite his evident glare of aversion. "What was her name again…? Kusanagi wasn't it? Kusanagi Motoko?"

Van didn't answer, grunting instead, yet only sat and waited for Merle to evidently continue.

"I'm pretty sure that's her name, we did get to talk with her for a few minutes when she dropped you off at Angela's door. She seemed nice. Was she, Lord Van?"

The place was quiet once again, yet the neon lights still buzzed, and the faded sound of the radio was off on commercial, and every now and then you could hear the distinct humming of the one waitress, now mopping up the other half of the restaurant, where one other customer made small talk with her. It might have been a placid little evening out to eat, had things not turned so rapidly sour, and had not every silent moment felt like an agonizing and torturous pause in the mêlée for truth and confidentiality.

Van rubbed his palm against his cheek, exasperated with all of Merle's nosy antics, feeling a surge to just scream out and demand of her to give it all up – it wouldn't get anywhere. He was frustrated by Merle, frustrated that her suspicion had just become so intent so suddenly, frustrated that she would take their last few moments together as comrades and allies and friends to warp everything against him, as if it were so important to let the entire world know exactly what he thought or felt. He was frustrated. He was sore. He _was _sore. All over, Van could still feel a fatigue, a pain that just as suddenly could come to be excruciating, his left leg being tender and swollen, his back feeling cramped and stiff. He didn't know what to think as he was already so consumed by just about everything else. There were so many things to think about, yet barely any of them involved his physical problems. There were so many things that ran adrift through his active thoughts: the idea of tonight. It was something that had came to him so frequently since the days had passed from their arrival, the thought of their inevitable departure at some time, in some day. But yet, although he felt cluttered and strained and disbelieving to what was fact and what was fiction, truth had it that today, and now, was that time he had so thought of, and at times, even dreaded. In nothing but a few hours, or even less, Van would no longer see the strange technology of this foreign world, or taste the exotic foods of this populated lands, be exposed to the extreme culture of a faraway place, or just be anywhere remotely close to the magical land of the Mystic Moon, of the Earth, as he had grown accustomed to calling it. That thought, that thought of utter separation plagued him so, to the point where he only felt sore in one place – at heart.

"She was nice," Finally Van, sullenly and almost even regrettably, complied with Merle's bold demand for an answer, which she apparently didn't feel like backing off of. "Of course that Motoko woman was nice; she wouldn't have driven me all the way to Angela's home if not."  
"I got to talk to her for a little bit," Angela suddenly decided to join in conversation, sensing a remote yet growing leniency Van was starting to have towards his secrecy becoming revealed. As the eldest of the group, and the only one who actually was a resident of the Mystic Moon, she felt that it was no harm for her to know at least the basics of what went on with the people that she had so willingly looked after for the last couple of days – considering it would be the last day the were to be with her. But Angela didn't think about that too often, there was no reason to pursue an even heavier depression – just yet.

"She told me a bit about her job, what she does," Angela continued, staring at Van softly, hoping that he wouldn't retaliate on the fact that all of them had questions they wished for him to answer. "She told me she met you at the hospital, on a case investigating that incident that occurred there."  
"That's true," Van nodded, still somewhat ungrateful to their prying concern towards him, yet feeling that he had no right to turn away the curiousity of Angela, just because of all that she had done for all of them in their short stay. He didn't feel it necessary to explain exactly everything that had happened, but he understood that he probably should be a little more detailed than he had been the night before.

"But I don't get it," Merle continued to eye him intently. He was starting to break down now, gradually. Although she hated burying into business that wasn't her own, she knew just as well as everyone else that this was the only opportunity that remaining three of them could get a better glimpse at just what the truth was. Maybe Van was right – maybe they didn't _have _to know any more than they already did, but the fact of the matter was that Van was evidently injured – something everyone had easily noticed upon his return with the limping and fatigue he so obviously showed. Another fact was that he _had _been in a hospital, therefore he had been treated for those injuries with some sort of foreign alien medicines of this world, and also he had been involved with people – like the detective – in issues that no one asides from Van really understood. Moreover, after Merle and Shied had tried to visit Hitomi the night earlier, upon returning to the Ramada to drop Merle off, it was only a miracle that she had managed to find their luggage and escape off with Shied and Angela to stay overnight with them, seeing as the hotel was alive and buzzing with some sort of controversy about the incident that Van so kept undisclosed.

"What don't you understand, Merle?" Angela looked towards their feline companion, of course sporting a visor and windbreaker to make her seem anything but feline, feeling that there were only a million things that they all didn't understand, yet she too wanted to edge things on so that maybe it will all come to be understood a bit better.

"If that lady was so busy investigating this so called 'incident', then how or why would she have had time to meet you, Van?"

Van stared towards Merle taking a heave of a breath – he was beginning to grow quite agitated of explaining himself with patience cutting short.

"Merle, it was becau—"

"And just _how _is it that you got injured anyway? You were pretty sketchy on the details."

"That's right Van, I'm concerned about that as well," Angela quickly quipped in, putting on a motherly expression and not trying to be too intimidating. She didn't want to force the truth out of him, he was an adult after all and should know what is best for himself, but considering the man had gone to a hospital for crying out loud, she could only wonder if his health would come to backfire on him, or all of them.

"I think we all are," Shied decided to express his opinion. After all, it wasn't difficult to see Van silently grimace from his left leg, which all knew was heavily bandaged underneath his leg pant. It didn't take any sort of genius to know that that was a serious wound, and Van yet hid a serious secret.

"I had told you already," Van glared at all of them, laying his hands on the table flexing his fingers to fists. "There had been an accident at the Ramada."

"Yes," Merle nodded, recalling all of the hubbub she had encountered at the front of the hotel. "But you never told us what kind of accident, and how exactly you got yourself involved and injured!"

"Van," Angela joined in, staring at him solemnly, "If it's okay with you, would mind telling us how you got hurt? We care for you… that's why we want to know."

The young king looked towards her, looked towards that gentle woman whom had so become like a friend to him, nurturing them all and becoming a mentor of sorts. When he stared at her beautiful face, dusty blonde ringlets and gentle azure eyes with an expression of genuine distress, he saw a motherly figure that she was, becoming the mother to all three of them, which they all had never really had. When his eyes came upon Shied, who was the closest to the kind Angela, he saw this earnest young man, probably more clever than he was, who stood proud with equal nobility to that of his father. And when Van looked to Merle, the most unique of them all but yet the most familiar, he could feel her honey eyes tug at his heartstrings, her compassionate expression relaxing his tension, her undeniable youthful curiousity still burning alive within the adult she now was. It was so evident as he sat there while they all focused so intently on him, that they _did _care, enough so that they wouldn't let matters slip them by, enough so that they wouldn't cease to persist even upon his hesitance. They cared for him, and although he didn't know how ready he was just yet, he knew he had to show some gratitude.

"There was almost an accident," Van quietly began, hustling out the words to avoid slight pauses, watching his companions light up in satisfaction to hear him speak, as he ran a nervous hand through his raven hair. He didn't know just what it was he should say, and then again, he also didn't know what it was he shouldn't say, but he would as well try to spit out something. 

"It happened on Fifth Ave," he decided to begin with the basics. 

"Right at the front of the hotel," he figured the location wouldn't hurt. 

"I could hear some sort of commotion outside -- it had all happened so quickly," he slowed down the playback of yesterday's events to capture the detail. 

"There was this red car, it was so loud, it roared past us at a faster speed than all the other vehicles," he recalled the reckless automobile. 

"And a few seconds after it passed, then there was this..." 

Suddenly he paused. He felt his throat catch – it had just begun. He had only begun to retell the story, when already he felt a strong inkling to _lie, to avoid the truth, to keep it only for himself and one other. Van longed only to skip out on this one detail, yet without it, the story could make no sense and would only leave reason to their suspicion. Besides, with his friends' eyes glowering with concern, with his heart fond of nobility and respect, he could do no such thing as lie. But what was he to do? _

"There was this woman," Van said it hurriedly. He was not apt to the idea of being any more specific than that. He figured, depending on his tone of voice, his friends might just come to believe it was just any general Earthling woman, and wouldn't catch on to how much deeper the situation ensued. 

"… She was crossing the street at the wrong time," Van continued to rush out the words. He didn't want to give himself a moment's rest to think it all through, or thus his voice would become rigged with emotion. 

"There was this big thing, some kind of cargo vehicle which is called a 'truck' here I suppose, and it was… out of control to say the least. I'm not too sure why, but she passed out right there in the middle of the street." 

"Oh my God," Angela's eyes were agape and wide. Honestly, that mental image that Van was so vividly painting was not at all as she assumed. In her mind of logic, she had figured that Van possibly ran into some disagreeable persons, possibly even gang members, whom he had gotten into a fight with, and eventually the detective had come to intervene. After all, neither Van or the detective were clear on what had occurred the night before, so a thousand scenarios had come to mind. But now, Angela could see that this 'incident' had involved a life other than Van's. 

"What on earth happened?" 

"Well, it would have been inevitable if no one had done anything," Van remarked darkly, feeling still disgusted as he had recalled it. There were so many of them. There had been so many spectators, fit and middle-aged people just as he was, just standing by and uselessly observing fate unravel. 'How cowardly,' he thought ashamed of such a people, selfish slobs of beings that had no heart of courage as he so proudly invoked. There was only one thing that bothered him so, plagued Van so -- the reality that would have occurred had Van not been there, had he not have had that strange vision only moments before, had he not had such a premonition of critical warning: 

"That woman would have died." It was a horrid thing for Van to imagine, and thus he didn't. He would never want to picture something so grotesque. He would never come to know something so heart breaking had such a fate instead been chosen. 

"But I was there," Van continued to explain, yet it was also an assurance to him, a permission to dismiss that horrid thought, for _he had been the one to prevent it. "So I had to do something." _

Merle let out a breath. Laying her chin upon her clenched fingers, she studied Van's expression closely. By looking at him, and knowing within how his wounds hurt him so, yet feeling the intensity of the tale he told, she felt it overwhelming -- admiration. Sure, of course the thought that her dearest Van -- no matter how many skirmishes they got into as she grew older and more independent, he would always be her 'dearest' -- merely inches close to an image of bravado yet also fatality raced her heart so, by him just sitting where he was she knew he had overcome it. Her dearest Van was the person she would always admire most and overall, a hero to her -- but not just her -- to many. 

"You saved this woman didn't you?" 

"I had to," Van nodded, feeling not a moment's hesitance. He was confident in those words, for at the time when it had occurred, since then and up until now, Van had felt as if had no other choice. Of course it had been dangerous, life-threatening, and would reveal his alien identity to the hundreds of eyes that were peeled on to each of his movements, but despite the downsides, his options were heavily outweighed -- he was going to save her, he did save her, and to him that was the only possible outcome that he would have been able to live with. There would have been no other way. 

"But you got hurt?" Angela looked to him worriedly, recalling his bandaged leg. "That must have been so painful! And that woman too?" 

"Of course _she wasn't hurt!" Van argued defensively, then realizing what he had just done, he softened his tone. __He was beginning to show emotion. He was making it evident that Van had put himself to injury before that woman could even get a scar, and with his concerned tone, it showed that he had cared for her, more than what was expected. He couldn't risk such information becoming too known. _

"She wasn't hurt," Van repeated, softer this time. "But I guess when I finally picked her up, I couldn't run away fast enough. A part of the truck hit my left leg, and so I was wounded pretty badly, but hey, it could have been much worse than that. " 

"Wow, Van," Shied stared to him. "You're right: it _would have been much worse for you and that lady had you not had so much bravery at the right time. You sure are one hell of a courageous hero." _

"Shied's right," Angela smiled to Van brightly. She had always known that Van was an honourable and well-worthy man with his upbringing of his once extinguished city as its youthful leader, but she didn't know just the extent that Van's nobility stretched past that of politics. "You did that all for a stranger Van, and were even humble enough to not boast it to us, hell we had to pry it out of you. It's a pity you couldn't stay long enough to receive some recognition. Did that detective say anything about you getting any honourable mention, awards even, for what you've done?" 

A tint of red tickled over Van's face. It was strange to him the way his companions interpreted yesterday's events, as if he was a superhero of sorts for doing what he did. In a sense, Van had been heroic, but that was most definitely not the focus of all that had seen his heroic actions. Of course, Van knew that by the way he had described things, he had made it sound like Van had actually been on the ground when he had saved that woman, and had just dodged in front of the truck seconds before impact and lifted her off the ground. He had deliberately avoided the topic of his wings, because at the mention of them, Merle would definitely know he was hiding something more. 

"She didn't say anything like that," Van answered truthfully, remembering nothing but negative attention, no where remotely close to being honoured with rewards or such. The only such publicity he could imagine receiving is the honour of being poked and prodded by Mystic Moon scientists taking feather samples and blood samples, with all the witnesses labelling him as a flying freak of sorts. "I don't need that kind of attention." 

"That's my Van of course -- always the humble hero," Merle hushed softly, once again linking her arm around his and resting her head softly upon his shoulder. She was getting accustomed to doing so, this act of fondness she had never gotten to do in so long. Van had never had time for such a thing, to sit and chat and smile at Merle's affections and she didn't expect him to have that kind of time. He was a king, and a busy king at that. Van was not the type to have servants run around and do his tidings for him when he could do it himself, yet another one of Van's unselfish qualities. 

The young Fanel merely smiled in return, patting Merle's soft pink hair, tied back in a loose ponytail while concealing her long ears. He thought it sweet that she would hold him so, calling him a "humble hero" as she had said. Van did consider his best pride to be rooted in humility, yet his secrecy of the topic of his actions was not due to a denial of pride. _Had circumstances been exactly as he had described -- the woman being a stranger, his saving her having been entirely by foot -- then Van __would have told them about it the day earlier, and Detective Motoko probably would have mentioned it and given him some sort of recognition or gift. But the way things had really played out was much supernatural than everyone wanted to accept, and much more intimate than Van wanted to share. It's not that he enjoyed keeping the entire truth from those he cared about, but at this point, he wanted to keep his heart for himself. _

"I'm so glad that you and that woman came out okay," Angela declared with relief, feeling at ease to the somewhat happy ending despite Van's wounds. "But did you get to speak to her? Was she alright?" 

"Just for a little while, yes," He answered truthfully, yet not so specifically. "But soon after the authorities were called and I… well I had to be attended to at a hospital they told me. After a while, Detective Motoko decided to give me a lift home, and since I couldn't return to the hotel without risking the revelation of my identity, I had a feeling coming to your home would be the next best choice." 

"It was a good choice Van," Angela smiled, agreeing, patting his hand assumingly from across the table. "And thank you for telling us what happened. You had nothing to be ashamed of." 

"Mum's right," Shied looked to him, while sipping up the remains of his cola. "If citizens of Gaea got wind of that, just imagine how many honorary medals you'd receive!" 

"Hah," Van smirked, knowing that had the whole thing occurred on Gaea, it wouldn't have seemed so unusual. Many of the Fanelian people were entirely aware of Van's demi-Draconian features. "I don't think I'd want anymore. Speaking of our homeland, it's getting quite dark out there. I think it's just about time we get going." 

"Oh that's right," Angela gazed anxiously out into the night, where the darkness had begun to settle. Looking towards her analog watch, she spotted the hands lying upon the six and the eight. "Six-forty already? Wow. It sure is difficult to drive in these rural parts of town once dusk fully sets, barely any streetlights out there. I'll just go freshen up for a second, and we can get going." 

"I need to go wash off too," Shied stated, staring at his shiny fingers coated from the cooking oil. "These foods _are greasy." _

"Sure, we'll wait up for you in here," Van agreed, watching both Shied and Angela disappear off down a corner to the restaurant's grimy bathrooms, passing a courteous smile to the one waitress. He felt a bit contented now, stomach satisfied with a good moment's rest from the long drive, and the guilt so involved in confidentiality partly lifted off his back. Of course, his leg still bothered him and he hated the idea of having to waltz around in an apparent limp, but he was grateful that he could at least walk. Next to that, his back itched like madness, and his mouth was eerily dry. His mouth had been dry the entire day with sweat building upon his palms as if there had been a transfer of body fluids, but he still decided to ignore it. After all, Van wanted to be cool-headed about the whole ordeal, the whole thought that all in all, these few moments were the last. he'd see in this strange place. Sure, so the young king hadn't claimed residence on the Mystic Moon for very long, but there was something strong about his short stay that constantly rang at the back of his mind. There was something... more to it rather than just a short vacation from royal duties, something stranger. Of course, taking everything into account, just _being on the Mystic Moon was strange, considering the odd and in no other way to be described, "magical", way of coming to the world and returning, and discovering an intelligent life form so different from the ones of his home. So his coming here was without debate, a phenomena of sorts, as well as a temporary tourist-like relaxation from a normally rigorous life, but yet it was more. There was something... more. _

Then he noticed two yellow beads staring intently at him. It kind of took him by surprise, to hear her strange words: 

"I saw them Van." 

He glanced at her from the corner of his eye, spotting her sitting so close to him and watching his every movement, feeling his every breath. He wondered what was up with Merle, as if her attitude had so suddenly changed, no longer light-hearted or playful but now seeming a bit too intent, too focused on him, as if she had awaited this exact moment of their being alone to bring about the change. He wasn't fond of when Merle would be so demandingly curious as she now acted, for like cats, she did not blink when she was absolutely fine-tuned with something, thus Van couldn't help but find her two wide yellow specs with a fine black slit down the centre only a tad bit intimidating. 

"Saw what, Merle?" He swallowed down some water, trying to act casual, trying to keep his cool, pretending not to get the hint that Merle knew something he knew, but wouldn't tell and hoped she didn't know. He licked his lips, as he did when he felt under a strange pressure. 

Merle, still unblinking, motioned her hand towards his upper back, cocking her head sideways as if to subliminally say "_I know." _

"When you were re-applying your bandages to your side," she began to explain, blinking once, and then softening with a more compassionate expression. She lay her hand upon his arm. "I saw the two marks on your back, Lord Van. You have two large rashes, a deep red. They must have hurt." 

"Well hell yeah," Van agreed casually, cool-like, still in his realm of 'pretending' that he didn't know what they both knew. Van gulped down the rest of his water, before finally thinking up a lame excuse for the very apparent markings on his backside. "Getting hit by a truck means taking quite a painful pounding you know." 

"I'm sure it would," Merle sighed in reply, wondering as to why he just wouldn't be straightforward with her. They were alone after all, and Merle was dropping just about all the hints she could drop concerning the fact that Van was not hiding what he wanted to hide very well at all -- at least not from the young cat woman. She had suspected it from the start of all the mayhem, but upon seeing the rashes upon his back late last night, she knew right then that what she had suspected had been confirmed. And now with Van's story about this supposed "mystery woman" and a daring rescue as such, it was just like icing on a cake. 

"I'm sure it would hurt, Van. But the thing is, the part of the truck hit your leg, not your back." 

"And I suppose _you would know?!" Van clanged his glass back down on the table, for reason of impatience and also hope that his sudden harsh reaction would have Merle back off the topic before she got too much into it. But to his misfortune, Merle didn't even flinch. _

"Van, obviously I know. If you had been hit on your back, you would be dead." 

He looked to her. His eyes were fiery with a warning, as if a loud sign that he beckoned her to dig no further, yet Van knew he was easily defeated. Even if he were to raise his tone and yell at her to stop prying into his business, he knew that was treatment Merle didn't deserve. She was showing how good of a friend she was by knowing so far ahead before he spoke, and how clever she come to become. She was also the stubborn type now, much more than when she was younger. She wouldn't always do things because Van asked, but would do things only if it was to his benefit. In this, he knew that Merle thought it better for him to just get everything out in the open, otherwise she wouldn't have bothered to persist even despite his annoyance. 

"You only get those kind of markings for one reason and one reason only," Merle decided to continue at Van's silence signifying his lack of defense. "You didn't even touch the ground when you saved that woman, did you?" 

He stared toward her with eyes glimmering of burgundy and maroon, with a sigh so soft in total bewilderment as to what to say. Should he have been so surprised that Merle would be acute enough to pick up on every detail and piece things together to form what could only be the truth? She was always first to know anything and everything about him, as it was vice versa, so Van should only come to accept her partake on even his intimate life. 

"Van," Merle spoke again, wondering as to what Van was quietly thinking. "You used your wings, didn't you?" 

He looked away from her, and rested his back upon the sofa-bench on which they sat. He didn't see the use in trying to concoct some sort of escape from her prying eye, for the issue was far past denial. 

"Yes, Merle, I used the wings to save her. It was the only possible way." 

Merle nodded, with a glimpse of a smile, "I had thought so. I thought, 'Van must have used his wings, he always uses either them or Escaflowne when he's that brave'. But then, you can always use Escaflowne, but you can't always use your wings." 

"What do you mean by that?" he eyed her strangely, though fully aware of what Merle meant. "They're my wings, I can use them as I please." 

"Maybe so," Merle only partially agreed. "But after you don't use them for so long, it takes something special to give you that ability to release them again." 

"I'd say that woman's life being endangered was a pretty special circumstance, don't you think?" 

"Well, then, to be more specific, it takes _someone special for you to release those wings and have done what you did." _

There was an odd silence. Van's mouth was part open, part ready to form a speech of argument, but out came nothing. He couldn't think of an alibi, a reason to escape the specifics, to avoid the inevitable. As he stared at her, Merle the triumphant, he knew Van was backed well into a corner that he couldn't as well run from. Thus, he didn't persuade Merle any further, for he knew that she was ready to move in for the kill: 

"It was _her, wasn't it?" _

Van paused. Merle paused. There was nothing but a dead silence, each awaiting the confirmation or denial that would come to follow. Van looked to Merle, Merle looked to Van. It was at a complete deadlock. 

"Okay guys, I got the bill paid up at the front, ready to get going?" In the intensity of the moment, the two had barely noticed Shied and Angela's return, fetching on their spring jackets entirely unaware as to what they had just butted into. 

"Yeah, it seems we're barely on schedule here. Guess Dryden's gonna have to put up with us being a little late," Shied commented, walking up ahead with his Mum, who reminded him to quickly zip up his coat as they approached the exit of the restaurant. 

Van got up quickly to follow, finding a sudden path to a temporary escape, until suddenly he was physically held still. 

He looked down, and saw her cute and smiling face, honey eyes with beautiful long lashes and the most adorable button black nose, framed innocently with a soft cherry-pink, hugging him tightly as she had when she was young, catching Van off guard in a soft embrace. He didn't know what to say, mouth poised in words, body rigid, so surprised by her show of affection despite his own stubbornness to answer what she had wanted so much to know, or more so, for him to tell. But even as his words came to be voiced, as he finally decided that it was now or never for a quick confession, Van was adequately interrupted. 

"Quiet Van," She hushed playfully, smiling. "I'm proud of Van. I love you Van, and I'm so happy for you. I'm so happy that you got to be with Hitomi for even just that little time." 

Her words hit like bullets, that name fierce like the piercing of a sword, yet soft as an inkling to his heart and a skip of heartbeat. There was the truth. There was that truth he had hidden, so easily and quickly expressed in her own simple matter. Merle had always been like that, summing up exactly what Van felt from complicated to ingeniously simple, showing him just what he couldn't see .Van should have been happy, like Merle was for him, that even that time -- short as it was -- was still his to experience and allow his memories to indulge upon. He should merely be happy and incredibly grateful that for that short yet meaningful fragment of his life, a love he could not deny had been in his arms, her whisper in his ear, her emerald eyes in his view, her mahogany hair at his gentle touch... her lips upon his, just for that simple, sweet time. 

He swallowed quietly, and closed his eyes before a tear began to well. He realized then that they had gotten what they had come for, Van's happiness in his love for that dearest woman, Merle's happiness in Van's. 

"I'm so happy for you," she quietly repeated. 

Van could only return her embrace, thinking of just one thing to say in return:. 

"So am I Merle, so am I." 

* * *

"You did _what_?"

"… Look Mom, I really don't know exactly. I guess the thought of it all scared me enough… that I… I fainted, I guess."

"Fainted?"

"Yeah, something like that."

"In the _middle _of the road?!"

"Yes, mother, in the middle of the road. Fifth Avenue if you want to be that exact. Besides, what would _you _do if you saw a truck coming at you? It's not exactly a calming scene, okay? Give me a break!"

"Give _you _a break? Please – oh please, Hitomi. This is pathetic. Why on earth would you faint like that? Something hit you on the head or something?"

"No! Gosh Mother, what don't you understand?! I said this gigantic truck was coming, and it scared me, so I passed out. Anyone would. Wouldn't you feel the same?"

"Yeah, sure I'd be scared as hell, but then I'd _run _out of the way, Hitomi, not fall to my knees like a helpless little child! I thought you were the one arguing that you're not a little girl anymore – you're all grown up, right? Yet it looks like you can't even cross the road right without me having to hold your hand all the time."

"This doesn't involve you, Mother. I can as well handle the situation on my own. I didn't invite you over here. I didn't ask you to intervene. I didn't ask to you to meddle in my affairs. I let go of your hand a long time ago."

She could feel it. She could feel the sudden way her breath inhaled and exhaled, growing adversely in tension and more rapid with each passing sequence: breathing in through her nose, breathing out, breathing in through her nose, breathing out. Somewhere along the ridges of her palm lay four embedded marks in each, dug callously into the skin by the clenching of her own fists, the tightening of her feminine hands against themselves, pressurizing further as her temper thus rose. Hitomi Kanzaki could not see her own reflection, yet she knew her face was flushed deeply, temples throbbing and eyes afire. Parts of her body would instantaneously twitch, whether it would be the swift movement of her left eye, sudden tremble of her fingers, or an angered jostle at the corners of her mouth. She was angry, no, not so much angry, but irritated and near to furious. Everything was unfair as depicted by Hitomi's mind and exasperated contemplation, not knowing so much as to what to think, but more so focusing on how it was she would block out such aggravating noise, such nonsensical nuisances. But she couldn't, for it stood right before her.

"What are you going to do about this, _hmm? Just what do you plan to do?"_

Her voice was practically sinister, _nagging, _annoying in absolutely every sense. How long had Hitomi been listening to her? How long had she been bearing such ill treatment with patience? How much longer could she do such a thing? Apparently, the young twenty-year-old had already demonstrated her aversion to this scenario by the indent forever left on her apartment bedroom wall, and thus with it a slightly damaged telephone, as amongst the other various things that Hitomi had managed to destroy over the duration of days. But here, face-to-face, where that anguish was inescapable and couldn't be so easily smashed out of problem's way, Hitomi found herself only struggling to contain that immense rage. It grew spitefully within her, although a small and minute part of her did want to keep a cool head, with thoughts of logic and empathy, rather than the selfish desire to be understood which she now so powerfully possessed. But there was no overriding such an essence, for it had been something of which the young Kanzaki had experienced her entire life, this burden – this being "misunderstood". And of all times of times, this was the moment; this was the moment where everything was revealed to her. She understood now. She knew of her past, she knew well, and her memory served her and only her. She wasn't going to live to please anyone, or change anything to accustom to what's "normal". Hitomi knew her life was not normal, and most of all, she knew that she wasn't going to take anymore of this doubt from someone who should have loved her most – her mother.

"We already discussed this," Hitomi hissed, tired of the topic. "I already explained to you what's going on."

"I know what's happening with your screwed up life," Hikoro lamented rudely in return, pacing herself around her daughter who sat in the dining chair in low, diluted-yellow light, as if in interrogation, with only a thousand times more emotional strings attached to it all. "And frankly, I think it's quite pitiable. Which is why I'm asking you what you're going to do about it, Hitomi. You obviously can't expect this to all blow over on its own, and you've made it clear that you don't want my help. So, then, just how are you going to solve this problem of yours?"

She looked back towards her mother with an ungrateful expression of slanted green eyes glaring beneath a set of brown bangs, no answer to her demand, and not even a word to so much as creep up her throat. If Hitomi had even one clue, had one bare and minuscule vague idea as to what exactly _would _be the solution to that, she'd be one somewhat happy person. Truth of the matter was, there _was _no answer, and that _was _the problem. Options lay before Hitomi, each as ugly as the last, and this moment that she came upon being uglier than them all. She knew time would pass, and hopefully her mother would tire and leave Hitomi be, but until then, she would have to struggle to find explanations that would suffice to Hikoro's unreasonable manners.

"You don't know what you're going to do, DO YOU?"

_ SLAM._

Hikoro Kanzaki's hands came to meet upon the table surface, shaking her head angrily with a voice so loud and fierce that even Hitomi had been taken slightly off guard, the clench of her fists loosening as she had reacted in surprise. Strands of Hikoro's black hair came drifting down from her ponytail and hairclips, paled hands lightly wrinkled with a dash of age, spread against the table in demand for Hitomi's stubborn cooperation. How Hitomi Kanzaki recalled such a thing so easily, such a display of arrogance towards her, that vile resentment. Hadn't it been just the night earlier when in this very same room, by this very same table, her once beloved fiancé, who too should have loved her most, had done the very same thing? _SLAM_. Such sudden sounds, such anger invoked by these people. They were upset with her, and equally, Hitomi with them.

"What do you _want _me to do?" she grumbled angrily, having to restrict herself from saying the more despicable responses that came to mind. She tried so desperately to soothe the anger in her tone, by directing her glance towards the kitchen to where she knew her anxiety-plagued friends remained, reminding herself not to get too carried away, if not for her sake, for theirs. "You can't expect everything to go along just as it was, Mother, I can't do that!"

"Hitomi, let's get something straight," Hikoro's tone was hostile, as her arms locked themselves as they crossed. "You're being _childish. _Lots of couples go through these premarital disagreements, you and Amano just need to—"

"Mother, don't assume as if it's just some little problem!" Hitomi sighed frustrated, exasperated from wearied efforts. "It's not a 'little problem', okay? NO couple has been through what we're going through now, no one woman I know was nearly hit by a truck—"

"Hitomi, that has_ nothing _to do with your relationship to Amano. Quit complaining. You brought that incident upon yourself walking around like that. What were you thinking going downtown all by your—"

_"You're not listening to me!"_ A fist slammed against the table surface, Hitomi's voice beginning to beckon for volume. "It has _everything_ to do with it! It's the reason Amano's upset in the first place."

"Oh that's right," Hikoro shook her head with a mouthful of sarcasm. "How could I forget? That's when your little 'mystery lover' saved you right? The one that you want to be with and screw up everyone else's life for – just for you to be all happy! It's always about you isn't it, Hitomi? How dare you cheat on Amano like that! He has been everything to you!"

Hitomi grimaced momentarily, feeling the heat of the conversation, but as well, feeling the strike of the blow. There was something she hadn't told her mother, in fact, there was plenty. It had occurred to her as common sense to omit the details as to exactly who that "mystery lover" was, deciding that keeping the mention of her past astray from the present would be for the better, knowing that if her mother knew that any of it related, there would be no such negotiation. If her mother only knew the exact happenings in all of its mystifying truth, chances are Hitomi would probably be disowned, with the way things were going. However, although Hikoro Kanzaki may not have been aware of how deep the plot sunk, still, she came up with a point that so plagued Hitomi. Hikoro was right about Amano, he was faithful to her, and although her confused little heart led not in his direction, she couldn't bear the thought of trampling his underfoot.

"I know that," Hitomi hesitantly agreed. "Amano's wonderful, but—"

"But you love another man, right?" Hikoro's voice had not come to bear any understandable sympathy. She still stood, hovering beside Hitomi like a looming shadow, biting her lip in disbelief. She could not come to accept that such a thing was occurring, that such a problem had manifested… within her own daughter all the more! Hikoro had always thought Hitomi to be better than that, so much better as to not be so callous towards her poor young fiancé of so many years, how could Hitomi be so rash and irresponsible? "Since when has this been happening, Hitomi? Huh? Since when have you been seeing this other man? Who is he… a co-worker? Friend?"

"Enough with that, Mother!" the frustrated daughter nearly screamed, wondering if her palms had come to bleeding with all the pressure on her hands. "_WHY_ do you make it seem like I'm cheating on Amano? WHY!? I never even said that, I didn't even imply it! I told you that there was an occurrence, and this other man had saved me from near death if you even care, that was it okay? There's no secret little love affair here! I never said there was! NEVER!"

As soon as the passionate words left the rim of Hitomi's mouth, with a seemingly impacting echo to ring amongst the walls, it would only come to be a manner of split seconds before they would all come suddenly rushing back, slapping her sharply like a stinging cut against the cheek. In mere moments, it enticed her to ponder: Was she right? She had to be right of course, Hitomi didn't doubt herself… but what about that last statement: 'There's no secret little love affair'? Had she meant that? Well, of course she would have to, she couldn't imagine herself being in an affair of any sort, never mind being in one even before marriage! But still, at the instant she had uttered the very words, already Hitomi's lips began to tingle, to quiver and tremble in the truth that they knew, in the secrets that Hitomi may as well have been denying. They quivered softly, ached so discreetly; longing for a touch that was not hers to have… longing for the touch that was not Amano's to give. Did that give it reason? Did such a craving feeling, although well hidden from the preying eyes of her mother, give reason to Hikoro's doubt, her uncertainty, her distrust of her only daughter?

"So you're saying you didn't really love this mystery man who saved you, is that it?" Hikoro asked bluntly, still with plenty doses of rightful skepticism.

"I'm saying that I knew I couldn't pursue a relationship with him, and I didn't."

"But yet, you harbored feelings for him, did you not?"

Hitomi swallowed tightly. Why was it that she could never answer one thing correctly without leading it into something worse? It seemed and looked and felt impossible to her to find some miraculous way to weasel around undesired topics without landing right into them. She had to face the facts: her mother knew how to get the truth out of her, and she would do anything to get it.

"Why don't you just leave me alone…" Hitomi mumbled miserably under her breath, deciding that she could not answer the question without lying, knowing only that her mother's perception to a lie was as acute as an eagle's eyesight on the open plains. Instead, the distraught woman laid her hands upon her face, smearing them down as she exhaled exhaustedly, wishing only for everything to end.

"Hitomi," Hikoro settled herself beside her daughter on the opposite chair, facing her deeply with her rounded eyes, black as they were intense. "You're hiding something from me, aren't you?"

"How do you figure?" Hitomi peeked towards her mother between her fingers still upon her face, holding her breath for just a second as she could easily spot the drabness in Hikoro's expression. What had she meant by that? Was it only a tactic, a mere form of strategic offense that Hikoro had only said in order to try to get Hitomi to break and falter, thus explaining a secret that her mother had only assumed was there? Or did Hikoro Kanzaki know or sense just as much as she let on, was it her mother's instincts and Hitomi's uneasy behavior that led to the obvious display that the full truth was yet to be revealed?

"It doesn't add up." Hikoro stated quite directly, signifying that the fact she had presumed the existence of something hidden was not just a tactic of hers, but also common sense from what she had observed. "You're telling me that you didn't really 'love' this man that had saved you last night from your carelessness. If that were so, you would have obviously told Amano that last night, right? So assuming you had, why would Amano be as fed up with you as he is now? He's a rational man, that Nekuchi, and he's loved you since. I can't imagine that he wouldn't be forgiving to your situation since that other man had just been helping you and you were trying to help him. There was no 'love' between the two of you, or so you say, right?"

Hitomi looked to her distantly, trying not to make it evident that Hikoro was catching on to more than she wanted her to.

"And so it shows to me that there's obviously something that you don't want to share, Hitomi. Obviously, there is some unmentioned factor here, which is why Amano is as angry with you as he is. So what is it, just what are you hiding or denying or lying about?"

There was a sullen silence as the distressed twenty-year-old was now well aware that her mother had her right where she wanted her to be, backed helplessly into inescapable measures, cornered without breath and strangled without strength. It had been so perfectly phrased, that last statement by Hikoro Kanzaki, so flawlessly declared that it left the unfortunate Hitomi to only two equally unappealing resorts: one of which was to lie her way out of the situation once more, or on the total contrary, to dive headfirst directly into the truth. Whichever way that she decided to analyze it, she couldn't bring herself to feel any affection towards any of the two decisions. Before each of them lay a drab foreshadowing of what would be to come, just as it had been the night before with Amano. It was then that Hitomi's options had felt just as weighed as now, with not much leeway for a somewhat pleasing ending, of which there hadn't been one. No, the evening before had ended terribly, and it was the result of having chosen neither of the options laid before her. Instead, Hitomi had decided to remain silent, submitting to agonizing seconds of apprehension as he had tried so forcefully to reach an answer, yet she had purposely left him empty, knowing a lie would hurt them both, but the truth would hurt him all the more. It was a dreadful reality of which she now paid the price, feeling the chain of unwanted events was far from ending, circulating onwards in haunting repetition.

But yet – this wasn't Amano. This wasn't her fiancé; this wasn't the same situation as the night prior to this one. The night earlier, Hitomi had been ever hesitant to respond, loathing herself for having promised to answer yet never doing so, detesting herself for betraying the trust and insulting the dignity of her long and steady relationship to the man she thought she loved, the man she wanted to love all the more.

Today had been a long day. She had awoken late, deciding that slumber was a better world for her, deciding that as long as she wasn't awake to face the troubles, she wouldn't see them any longer. But yet an undisturbed rest was practically unthinkable – there was no way to achieve such a sense of satisfaction in a time where the needs of everyone beckoned harshly at her from every which way. Thus, she had lain awake for many hours, mind sometimes drawing itself voluntarily to a blank, and at other times, constantly ablaze with thoughts of the mess that was her current lifestyle, of every sudden complication, issue and trouble that had befallen her and those around her in such a short time. She just couldn't imagine entwining this to any worse of a situation, she didn't want to even come to picture vaguely what it'd be like telling her mother all she knew, to confess every little last detail, as unsightly as it may become. But if she dared to so boldly march suddenly into truth for her mother's sake, willing to bear the disapproval and destitution that would most certainly proceed, it did not end there, did it? That was the first step on a towering flight of stairs, spiraling onwards in this miserable truth, either destined to happiness or utter gloom. She would much rather start her vividly retelling account of why things were as troubled as they were to anyone but the person who sat before her, yet Hikoro left Hitomi no other choice. She most certainly wouldn't allow for Hitomi to huddle with her three hopeful bridesmaids and first get their opinion on her darkened troubles, and besides, Hitomi had a good feeling that her three close friends knew almost as much as Hitomi did about the ordeal, one way or another, through Cathy's eyes or Yukari's, they probably had managed to piece together the odd puzzle from what the two of them had perceived the last few days and nights. Chances were they already knew she was past neck-high in hot water, and could do less about it than she could. So what now? Did that leave it to result in Hitomi _having _to tell her mother about it? Why would she have to? Wasn't there any other way, some other more promising solution?

Yet as Hitomi sat and thought and wished it were that way, she knew the seconds ticked by ever so loudly, and a decision would have to be made. Her mother sat across from her. Her mother was waiting for a response, demanding one even, just as her fiancé had only the night earlier. She hadn't given one to Amano then out of her own fear of confession and reaction, and that in turn had worsened the conditions between them, their conflict with each other becoming dire, worldess and incredibly fragile, still hanging on the balance as everything now did. Would the truth of her actions, her thoughts, her feelings, and even her most secret desires, uncensored and untainted, in all of its absurd complexity, be the single most important resolution to a thousand problems she couldn't solve any other way? Would this rescue her, save her and wipe her clean of all of the many troubles… to open the doors to of her confounded spirit to all the world, despite the many disadvantages? Would this and could this possibly be Hitomi's only and best chance to finally bring this ongoing story to an end? It would have to end at sometime. At one point or another, the book would draw to a close; the conclusion would come to be, and life would go on as it was. What did she have to lose? It was the only sensible decision that she could possibly make. Hitomi had decided:

She will tell them all the truth, one by one, there would be no more secrets. The story would have to end. 

**Kaliko Rosa Creations .:. http://www.kaliko.cjb.net :.**


	16. Into the Night Sky

**

Previously on "When We Meet Again"…

** Was it all just a dream? No, it _was_ real. 

On a lonely day in mid-April, twenty-year-old Hitomi Kanzaki, a young woman once fresh at the pleasant times of her life, had been further immersed into a daunting tale she had once deemed implausible, riveted within a time – a memory – she had thought had never existed. The enraging conflicts between a distant fantasy and a demanding reality had brought her to a point of inconsolability, torn deeply between two paths that were entirely different from one another. There had been no clear answer or direction for the lost soul, as she had remained to sulk in the seclusion of her room for many hours, away from those she wanted to be with, and away from those who didn't want to be with her. A ring was all that was left as a departing gift from her once beloved fiancé who's heart had momentarily hardened towards Hitomi, and a lonely pink pendant from a person she knew but didn't know, and wanted to get to know all the more. She loved both in truth, and that was Hitomi's endless predicament.

With a wedding hanging on the balance, and the sake of many friendships on hand, Hitomi's devoted bridesmaids, Catherine Corain and Yukari Uchida, had camped out in the Kanzaki and Corain residence to find any possible solution to an intricately entwined dilemma that no one could solve. However, after a mild phone skirmish with Hitomi's cousin San Askielowicz, somehow, Hikoro Kanzaki, the much-dreaded mother of Hitomi, had caught ear of the troubles. Hikoro was not slow to visit her daughter, and so, the impending interrogation with a depressed and angry Hitomi had finally begun. The younger Kanzaki, sick of the doubting and quite sick of the lies, in an only desire to resolve the complications that had arisen so abruptly, had vowed to speak the truth. There would be no holding back. She knew well the consequences to be served for claiming such fantasy aspects to have happened or to be happening, for she was well versed in the feeling of being disbelieved, especially from her mother and her once-close companions. Yet, there was no reason to hide anything for any longer. Regardless, she was caged within a life of unwanted limitations, and if there was anything she preferred to depend on, it was the knowledge that the truth would set her free.

Meanwhile, three other persons in that same city of Aimsa were making preparations for a departure of their own, one that was equally dreaded by many. Angela Ferentini, the thirty-two year old woman whom had taken the young mental prodigy Shied Schezar into her fostered care, proclaimed him her son, as she had felt he was all of that and so much more. On their journey to the place of leaving, Merle, ever-devoted companion of King Van Fanel, had incessantly strived to reveal even Van's most inner secrets, proving of comfort to the man who denied his personal loneliness. Still aching from a wound on the outside, the calf of the left leg, the last reigning member of the Fanel family understood that the pain was more prominent within himself, within his heart. Though he denied on the surface just what he honestly felt and needed, there was no such way he could possibly lie to himself. All that was left was for Van, for _all of them_, was to make some final drastic decisions that could and _would_ change the course of their futures and of their lives. After all, they could only ignore their personal feelings for so long, to only a short extent, but everyone knew that something had to be done – something _would _be done. All that was left was finding out exactly what that something would be.

**Chapter 16: Into the Night Sky**

"Eighty-five, eighty-six, eighty-seven…"

"…It should be just around that bend Shied; you two doing okay back there?"

A pair of inquisitive yet friendly green spectacles gaped at him calmly through the darkened reflection of the rearview mirror; once-blonde ringlets now tainted a faint cyan amidst the intense moonlight filtered through the looming forms of densely packed conifers. Asides from somewhat weakened and dim headlights, the natural glow of the hovering moon provided the only light source in the eerily desolate area, overcast by shadows of natural forms. Although not feeling so much assured by that thought, Van still passed the querying Angela a reassuring smile in response, doing his best to come up with one seeing as he couldn't quite testify for having done much smiling lately. He figured that Merle, sitting adjacent to him, must have done the same for he just caught a glimpse of Angela giving a nod before returning her focus to the winding road ahead, nudging the steering wheel only slightly in the past few minutes, as Shied continued to call out numbers systematically in a practically perfunctory fashion. The idle Fanelian had also been keeping count for the first few minutes quite quietly to himself, but like times before, those incoherent thoughts of his journeyed far from what they were supposed to do, and instead left Van pointlessly counting each time the car would roll over a ditch or bump in the road. He wasn't much surprised by his inability to even count numbers straight, for the worn young man didn't feel much sentiment about anything. He had numbed himself, mentally as well as emotionally, to the point that he felt somewhat inane and useless yet decided to remain this way in the belief that it was only to his own benefit. Van wondered at times just where he came up with such forlorn and lonesome ideals, yet with his hesitating limp and sore shoulder blades sprinkled with itchy rashes, Van felt that the evasion of any excess mental pain was all for the better, especially on this night of all nights.

_Thump. _Van Fanel allowed for his head to rest against the quivering window, fighting off a saddened sigh which wished to escape, his thick black bangs stretching near to his ears protecting the skin of his face from the cold press of the glass. However, every now and then the car would hit some sort of imperfection in the road and his head would be uncomfortably bobbed against the window, yet he could only heave and give it no complaint. With his refusal to activate his mind and think about things – being somewhat isolationist from his own mental self – Van tried not to give any of his pains too much heed. He longed only to swallow them down long enough that no one would notice, and cry about them later in his own private means of regret and heavy remorse.

"One-hundred-ten, one-hundred-eleven…. I think we're just about there, Mum. I definitely recognize this place!"

The young and somewhat eager Shied had his face plastered against the car window ahead of him in the front passenger seat, squinting attentively to try and determine what surrounded the slow-moving travelers in the impenetrable darkness of the vast Aimsa backwoods. There was no hiding Shied's avid and young thirst for adventure, a brilliant mind working for a brilliant cause. He had told them – Van and Merle – that on their last trip to the "base", Shied had picked a certain reference point – being the speed limit sign about a few metres back – and had counted the seconds needed to reach the point where exactly the base was located, and all of their belongings and gathered "Earthly" treasures, which was why the Duchy of Frade happily rolled off the numbers as he did, pinpointing the location to an approximate 120 seconds worth of counting. Van, denying his vow of mental silence, wondered as to how exactly did that young boy feel such exuberance to such a day, or at this point, such a night. Shied just looked so… _happy… _so innocently energetic about the goings of their final hours on the Mystic Moon that it seemed incomprehensible to Van! Wasn't Shied saddened about it all? Bothered? Perturbed? Hell, Shied had been walking this world as practically a brother to the Earthlings, living in it and breathing in it longer than Van could ever imagine doing so! So then… why was it, or _how_ was it that even he could smile and anticipate so genuinely? How could any of them? Shied, Angela or Merle? Didn't they feel the pains of leaving, the worries, and the dread? Didn't any one of them feel as Van felt?

"Yep, it's right by that large tree with the hole down the center Ms. Ferentini, I believe that's where you parked the last time," Merle quipped from alongside Van, stretching over Shied's passenger seat to see better through the front window, yellow eyes glistening mysteriously as they were nearly overcome with black while her pupils vastly widened. Their less able eyes followed Merle's staring direction only to come across a pit of darkness poorly illuminated by low-beam headlights.

"One-hundred-twenty-two…" Shied's counting inaccurately slowed as he too slouched over to squint at the shadowy forms of passing trees and guardrails, feeling his azure eyes of blue being somewhat subordinate to Merle's for this particular use.

"Wow, Merle, those feline eyes of yours must have better night vision than any one of us," Angela smiled tentatively stating what they all thought as she cautiously followed the road by Merle's direction, unsure as to what to do or where to park as the darkness seemingly swallowed them whole, feeling herself slowing the car to a near crawling stop in her own hesitance, only thankful that she didn't have to venture such a dangerous and mysterious journey all alone.

"Don't worry, Ms. Ferentini," Merle patted Angela's shoulder reassuringly with a furred hand and blackened nails for claws, easily gazing to the scene ahead as if it were broad daylight. She had thought at first that it was merely the bright luminescence of the moonlight that had kept everything so clear and visible although that wasn't so much the case (having stayed in the lighted city for so many weeks had led her to forgetting the powerful nighttime abilities of her own eyes, black as their surroundings with widened pupils). "Just keep on going and slide over to the right a bit. There's a big cleared area here where we stopped the last time."

"Thanks hun, what would we do without you…" Angela nodded appreciatively as she slightly recognized the close-lying forms while the car headlights shone upon them, nudging the now barely moving vehicle to its former parking spot from the many times before. Driving had been, to say the least, absolutely nerve-wrecking for the woman in her early thirties, never having felt much confidence in her driving skills to begin with. She had only recently been convinced to get a car, the somewhat run-down second-hand ten-year-old vehicle that she not-so-proudly claimed as her own, simply to get herself and Shied around the city when times called for it, though she felt no hesitance or shame in quite happily using the incredible public transit system provided all across Aimsa and Japan, the country she considered to be home to the best and fastest train systems in the world. However, where they currently had parked themselves was in the heart of an area cut off by modern transportation routes and practically civilization altogether, left only for the daring to explore and those who needed to be there out of absolute necessity. Angela knew she fell in the latter of those categories, always having dreaded the few trips to the base. They boldly challenged such a rural area with what she knew was a pathetic excuse of a long-distance traveling vehicle with no cell phones or any other means to contact the outer world for assistance if need be. She had merely gone on such a dangerous excursion on the reassurance of having a full gas tank and a friend alongside her, each and every time being the one person she'd want to be with for so long, her dearest and beloved Shied whom she knew was clever enough to find them a way out of any mess they happened to get into. Yet what discomforted the young mother so deeply, and what plagued her and frightened her most at this time were not the worries on driving there and getting back, what bothered and disturbed her was the knowledge that on her way home, there would be no "other" on whom she relied. The three companions on who's impeccable vision, quick wit and good judgment she could stake her life upon would leave those seats vacant in less than a few hours. This was a thought that she left ignored for most of the way over, feeling if she thought of it, it would leave her in canceling the trip altogether, stopping in mid-road if she had to, knowing she would be unable to do such a thing, to see those seats become empty, and to feel so very alone. It wasn't about safety. It wasn't about reassurance. It was about the_ people _that filled those seats, which were of much more importance and value to her. Angela could only be thankful that they had already reached their destination, for now that she had begun thinking of such things; she desired only to turn right around and keep those seats filled for as long as she could possibly do so. She, like Van, would have to struggle against her thoughts, those secret thoughts they all had hidden.

"So we're finally here…" Merle hustled out the words, as she noticed that none of them had made the attempts to be the first to exit the car, as Angela shut off the engine and all had gone quiet, eerily quiet in a place as remote as this. She had no longing desire to be the first either, but she hoped her words would push _someone_ to be. Merle knew the large potential for things to grow hesitated and awkward, but she figured the sooner it was over, the better and less chance for such an uncomfortable phase to take place.

There was a lull for a moment after Van's feline friend's dying attempt to convince any one of them to voluntarily step out of the vehicle, not quite even convincing herself, and yet he could do nothing but merely observe. He had no intention of being the first either, and from what he saw, none of them did. The question really didn't lie on who would happily take on the task to signal the fact that they were here and they were moments away from a dreaded departure, but more so, who would be the first to fake a happiness towards such an ugly sentiment.

Van grimaced – he was thinking again, and a little too deeply at that. He didn't want to mind about the point of this journey, he didn't want to reason about the glumness of it all, he just didn't want to be bothered by the trials he so ardently ignored: all of that had been his mental vow after all. Yet try as he might, he knew well he was a bound slave to his active mind, gouging desperately for his attention and concern with the following thoughts in constant circulation: _perhaps reality hadn't hit them yet_ – it didn't seem like it anyway. Perhaps, in a sense, personally, they had all come to grips with the truthful and prevailing factor of the moment, but not enough to make it known to any other, not enough to prevent them from moving on, not enough to keep them all from taking that last step without spending a fleeting second looking back. Van didn't like to think of it, as he was adverse to the idea of even thinking at all, but yet his mind could not be put at ease otherwise in his wonderings. Was that possible of them? Was it really? They, himself, Shied, Merle and Angela, were not made of stone, or ice, or anything cold and inanimate – these were people, people Van Fanel knew well, warm and affectionate with one bonded to the other indefinitely. Though technically this was not their home or anywhere close to it, though the mystic world was not their own and should have felt foreign and alien to them, still yet, it had _become _their home for a certain length of time. This Mystic Moon, this "Earth", had become the central focus of a new intrigue and desire, personal aspirations and inspirations, adventures and recollections, memorable moments forever established in this distant and magical land. Each of them, every one of the three who had come a long way to be where they were, had undergone their own personal and emotional metamorphosis in one way or another, touched and forever emblazoned by the rich surroundings and exquisite experiences, influenced eternally in marvel of the scenery, the technology, the culture, the diversity, the lifestyle, the _people_. Did not such an idyllic place of impact deserve more than a small wave goodbye on an empty, starry night? Where was the sentimentality, the embedded attachment, the passion, the heartache? They couldn't have all numbed themselves to such a stoic extent, could they have? Well, Van had numbed his entire being quite well, had he not? And as in those moments, the young Shied Schezar, with a smile nearly a foot long, opened his front door as the first to break the dreary and muted silence, the first to fake that happiness they all resented, Van realized that they had all done the exact same thing: each of them was forcefully numbed and distanced. Each of them had chosen to ignore the evident, and each was aware that even if they wanted to, there was not one of them who planned on taking that last fleeting second to look back.

* * *

Had a pin dropped at that precise moment, it would have likely deafened them all. There was nothing but an utter silence, the purest of its kind, and instantly heightened tension as eyes were raised hesitantly and anxiously towards the figure at the door, suddenly having appeared unpredicted, enticing palms to sweat, nerves to tremble and knees to buckle as if the three had been caught in their humbled misdeed of dutiful eavesdropping.

Hitomi_ glared _at them.

She swallowed quite anxiously, for lack of courage to formulate any words. Yukari could barely meet such eyes of pure intensity. The bumbling Yukari Uchida noticed then the immensely intimidating power invoked simply by the commanding stare of her best friend's jade eyes, yet barely recognizing Hitomi at all, as her expression was mean and displeased, as if she had seen through burdened anguish and endless sufferings. It wasn't exactly the Hitomi Kanzaki Yukari was familiar with, or wanted to become familiar with. Admittedly, Yukari nearly felt rather impartial to such a situation, and had no idea really as to how to go about it, or offer any comfort. So rather than making any faltered attempts at some sort of meaningless reconciliation towards her, Yukari instead stood there in continuous silence and dim lighting amidst her two companions, as if in a police line-up from tallest to shortest, San Askielowicz standing post at Yukari's right, Catherine Corain keeping guard at the left. They had been that way, standing faithfully in Hitomi and Cathy's kitchen for what had felt like an eternity, in what was actually the currently most momentous forty minutes they had ever experienced. Their legs had tired them with a craving for a chair, but yet they had all stood there soundless, having listened intently to the conversation on the opposite side of the wall, where earlier Hikoro and Hitomi, mother and daughter, had been in heavy discussion trying to clear the dark clouds which hung over them all. It had been… agonizing, to say the least. Yukari had heard such tones before. She, although not ever having bragged to own the best memory, could most certainly recall days of old when such arguments had taken effect, frightening and powerful, two forces battling on such opposite ends, and now… here it was again. What was she to do? What were any of them to do? There had been no answer to such a question, none that they could come up with anyway, and so they had remained, staying only to see what kind of fate chance would bring about.

Hitomi still stood at the kitchen doorway only feet away from where they were; hand against the frame of it for either balance or a pose of demand, strands of brown escaping her loosely tied pony tail and eyes of that influential green still looming and unblinking, gray sweats of clothing sulking in loose folds with the mood. She had not yet said a word, and all wondered as to why she had so suddenly upped and left the table where her "argument" was taking place, having come to confront the three hidden spectators. The three had assumed it to be Hitomi's personal battle, and had left it voluntarily to be Hitomi's personal battle, but now it seemed as if they were receiving a live invitation to become a part of it all, an invitation that had also come uninvited.

"H-Hitomi…" like usually, the bold yet shortest Catherine, a true roommate, was the first to break the insufferable quietness, stammering unsurely as she too felt somewhat unsettled by the challenging appearance of her daily companion. "Are you…" However, Cathy failed to continue her trailing thought, feeling such a statement could end in such ways she knew was rather unproductive. Did it make much sense to ask if Hitomi was 'okay' or 'alright'? It was plain evident that she wasn't. So instead, Catherine pretended as if she had never uttered a word and stared only at those estranged eyes with an expression of deep sympathy.

It was displayed rather obviously that neither the best friend of Hitomi nor her roommate had any ideas as to what to do or what to say in their defense, and so all hope and expectation was left lastly for the woman, other than Hitomi, who had not yet spoken a word.

San thought about what had last been said, before Catherine's attempt at a comment. The newly arrived visitor from Poland, Hitomi's cousin bearing a rather significant resemblance, strived to recall the details of the heated conversation on the opposite side of the kitchen wall before Hitomi had so abruptly decided to pay them visit in the kitchen. Unlike the others, San – who happened to be studying law back at home – thought of the situation analytically, feeling equally imposed by Hitomi's presence, yet she still excelled in the know-how of how to go about it. And so, she thought of what had happened just moments earlier: Hitomi's and Hikoro's conversation had been growing louder, the disagreements having come more frequently, in an ongoing debate and lecture. She last recalled Hikoro demanding the truth from Hitomi, the full truth, asking for an explanation she was likely not prepared for, while Hitomi had done just about everything to avoid giving her one. But, seeing as she had been backed into an inescapable corner, Hitomi had said _'Fine, you want to know, I'll let you know. I'm sick of this stupid conversation. Don't blame me if you don't like what you hear' _or other rash statements such as that.They had been rather stinging words, common though for the angered Hitomi, but before anything could be felt towards them, the screeching sound of chair legs against the tile floor had filled the air, followed shortly by the pit-pat of socks and feet, up until the moment they were in now when Hitomi would suddenly stand before them. Surely then, the action had been deliberate, and Hitomi had wanted, or wanted, something from them. San knew well that she was there for a reason, and like it or not, the three huddling in their own seclusion would now be involved in one way or other.

"What would you like, Hitomi?" She spoke it simply and flatly and plainly. There were no 'how-do-you-dos' or pleasing greetings or hugs or compliments, as what would be expected from San Askielowicz to Hitomi Kanzaki. After all, it had been quite a few years since San had laid eyes on her favorite cousin, or shared a word with her in person, and the previous night practically didn't count as a worthy reunion. They had only gotten a few hurried minutes over some tea Catherine had made late last night to do some quick catch-ups and updates. Hitomi had arrived back to her own home rather late, after that mysterious outing (in fact, now that San thought of it, many things were mysterious, and she hadn't even _begun _to think of Hitomi's two strange visitors the day earlier as well). Hitomi's fiancé, a handsome man of whom San barely remembered meeting back when visiting when they were teens, also had a word to discuss with Hitomi (that having been the source of the problems _this_ night) which also hustled Catherine, Yukari and San out faster than they desired. And again, this night, it seemed that there would be no time left for any light-hearted discussion (that of which San now longed for – normality) and she knew when business was business. Hitomi didn't have the time or care for anything this day. She was tired and defeated and fraught. San would have to put aside her own disappointment that her visit was not as quaint as she had envisioned, and instead assist and contribute in any way she could.

Hitomi Kanzaki turned her attention to her assertive cousin, who had come up with such practical words, a statement that was much like music to her ears. She hadn't expected them to say anything really. Hitomi knew they had been there the whole time, and she wasn't really bothered by it, it was only to her reassurance that she was in company of other human beings aside from whom she now considered to be the wretch that was her mother. Though her exterior image showed only misery and a rather slothful dislike towards all and everything around her, she was yet still very grateful for these silent three that had been like invisible support hiding away, the comfort in knowledge that when she felt that all she cared for most were on the verge of deserting her, three incredible companions stood on guard like readied soldiers on high alert. They had been doing a lot for her, especially Catherine and Yukari, most especially indeed. The two of them had been around Hitomi for two days straight now, putting up with Hitomi's awkward antics of yesterday, and her glum resentment to everything today, always there bright and early to hours late at night. She hoped that now, they would be there for her just this one more time.

"You need us? We're here for you, you know." Catherine picked up quickly on the flow of things; not hesitating to offer her assistance that Hitomi had apparently come to ask of them.

"Same here," Yukari added respectfully, adding in a meek smile of newfound encouragement. "What would you like us to do?

Hitomi stared at them all again, but blinked softly this time, with her quiet nod of thankful appreciation – the most gentle image she had yet projected that day. With slowed and hesitant movements, trying not to show that she was not too keen on what she would now have to do but having to do it anyway, she backed away from the kitchen doorway and motioned down the hall towards the dining room, where all knew her impatient and somewhat infuriated mother awaited them. Their eyes followed her direction, in willing wait of instruction. Hitomi took a breath, and satisfied their apprehension. The instructions that followed were much simpler and less fearful than they had all expected yet equally left them vague and just as apprehensive as before:

"I would just like you three to come into the dining room for a moment. I'd like you all to hear this once and for all. There is something I have to tell you."

* * *

The night air was unpleasantly cold, and the wind was forceful and brisk, quite cold and quick sweeping through the uninhabited lands. Somewhere out there in that impassable dark obscurity of foliage and distant mountains lurked nightly creatures sculpted only by the fearful imagination, with howls and cries and hoots and crickets and crunches beneath padded feet only adding to that chilling illusion. And how that darned wind was so uninviting! Whistling like a wandering pack of hungry wolves! Although Shied Schezar felt he knew the area well enough now as to not have to fear it, even in the late of night, he was quite disappointed that it seemed as unfriendly as it did, the only sympathetic guide to them being the soft light shone from the waning moon and the countless stars of a clear night overhead. He wondered then where all that wind was coming from without a speck of cloud; perhaps that was simply the conditions such a night as this was supposed to have, nippy and gloomy as such. But how so very drab! Honestly, was there not one thing that could just seem somewhat positive for once? Huddling there now, half exposed to that unforgiving night and half reluctantly cowering within the artificial heat of his Mum's vehicle, Shied felt a hint of regret in having chosen to be the first to open his passenger door. Why had he done such a thing? Well, there was plenty of reasoning that had led to his decision; the main one being that he reckoned that it was quite likely he would be the only one who would anyway, otherwise, not one of them would have ever set foot out of that car even after the long travel to do so.

Shied sighed quickly and quite quietly to himself, knowing the others awaited him to step foot outside already, possibly some of them even curious or slighted as to why he would be so eager for something they all so privately dismayed. Shied was far from the mentally slowest of them all, if not the most cunning and fast thinking, even despite his misleading youthful appearance. He had already predicted and known days earlier that this day, or night, would be just the way it was, practically swimming neck-high in this superficial happiness or at least forced neutrality that they all had created to avoid anything sadder of the sort. Shied had been much like that himself, only just a few hours earlier, pressuring himself to think of the good things… and to stray always from the bad and also from the sad. But he had known what this day truly meant and truly destined, and so had everyone, and so had his mother, his Mum, his Angel, his Angela. He had not forgotten yet or forgotten ever that moment from just moments before, those precious seconds alone with her lastly in their apartment, that declaration he had so proudly spoken in the most articulate of manners: "_I am your son". _It had been strong, eloquent, poignant and ever so powerful. It had inspired and motivated him to also become inspiring and motivating to everyone else. It had built his decision with sheer confidence, with assurance and without doubt. Yes, it was due to that decision that his eyes of bouncing crystal blue were even bluer than normal, and his gentle wisps of blond bangs were light and carried free. Shied, unlike most and unlike the rest, did not feel burdened at this time – he felt secure, gladly secure. That decision _was_ secure. He wasn't sure exactly how much comfort it would be to anyone else other than whom it concerned, but at least he had discovered a way to settle his own young and troubled heart. It was no wonder really that he was so eager to implement that goal, that decision, and finally with that connotation, he entered quickly and quietly into that late night.

"Van! Careful now… here, let me help you." The other three companions of Shied were a tad bit slower to follow his actions, half due to their own disinclination, and for Van and Merle, most due to Van's inability to move as freely and as ably as he would have wanted to due to wounds here and there, as Merle was swift to rush to his aid. Merle, being that watchful feline type, was very cautious about such a thing. She knew her friend, her utmost best friend, was rather reckless as he had always been, denying pain where it was and refusing assistance when it was offered. However, Van should have known Merle enough to understand her stubbornness towards his stoic personality, unbelieving to his claims that he was "absolutely fine" or so as such, when within she knew he was anything but!

Yet oddly this night of nights, he seemed to have strangely accepted his dependence towards her, permitting Merle to sweep an arm under his and around his back, allowing him to lean his weight on her smaller self as Van fought for balance stepping out of the vehicle. Van, though, was nowhere near clumsy, and managed himself quite well – hopefully not by excessive force, Merle still yet worried. And she had every right to worry. She could almost even smell the pain riveting within Van's left leg, which he still, in spite of everything, tried to conceal. Although carefully bandaged and now treated, Merle knew well that it was likely far too early for him to be up and about as he was. She recalled the detective having mentioned something the night before, a word or two about devices called "crutches" that would have helped those in his situation, however, the two of them had not stayed in the Willendorf Hospital long enough to receive them. And so knowing this, without hesitance, Merle knew and completely understood her role to temporarily become those devices, to be that ease and relief towards her afflicted companion, knowing well of her ability to heal and mend the pain on the outside, yet aggravated always with her inability to do that same thing with the pain inside – within – where she knew it mattered most.

"You two okay over there?" Angela lent a watchful eye, peering over at the two over the hood of the car, after she had been preoccupied with trying to empty her vehicle of its contents, mainly the luggage and extensive belongings of her three passengers, which was actually quite the armful. Merle replied to her inquiry with a simple smile and nod, and so Angela continued on with her task, reaching back into the car through her driver door in incessant search for that darned—

"Hey, Mum, what about this thing?" Yet Shied beat her to it, much to her surprise and equal uneasiness. He too had been working on gathering miscellaneous packages from the trunk of the car and setting them on the dried dirt of the cold ground they parked on, but somehow he had found himself near the backseat, eyeing a largish, unlabelled cardboard box, riddled with holes near the sides, that had been where Merle was sitting. He hadn't even noticed it before, and was just about to grab hold of it for inspection, when he felt a quick-thinking furry hand take grasp of his thin wrist.

"Now, now, kid, you take care of the technical stuff, don't be bothered with little things like this," Shied gazed upwards promptly to notice Merle suddenly having appeared by his side, beaming back at him, with a cute little yellow visor half-hiding her happy eyes and whiskers frayed nearly mischievously. She seemed strangely upbeat to Shied's suspicion, yet he didn't question it and gave it a nod as Merle suggested he hunt down the heavy-duty flashlights instead which Angela had packed earlier in the trunk. Giving a subsequent breath of relief, Merle then took hold of that odd box quickly and quite carefully, handing it to the anxiously observing Angela with a mild wink, and a thankful impression. Then they continued about their business normally, as if nothing had ever happened at all.

Meanwhile Van, wobbling unsteadily, was not quick to think it, and yet even slower to accept it, but equally, he was starting to realize that trying to get around entirely on his own was not as easy as he had predicted or even assumed, after Merle had momentarily left him be to go assist Angela and Shied with something or other. Little had Van noticed that his entire day's worth of getting from one place to another had not been a solitary task – she had always been there with him, Merle had been there with him. He understood now that she had served voluntarily as his third arm or third leg, never quite leaving his presence for any longer than a few seconds. He was inwardly happy that she knew him well enough to know exactly when he'd need her most, and yet as if on cue, Merle again arrived by his side steadying him quickly before he just about toppled over.

"You're not trying to get around without me, now are you?" She was quick to quip quite aware of Van's reliance on her, easily retaking her position alongside her friend, walking him over slowly to where Shied was still busy unloading and sorting through dozens of packages that had somehow managed to fit into the tiny expanse of the trunk.

"I doubt I could even if I wanted to," Van replied with a sheepish but thankful grin, not so much forced, as he did feel genuinely compelled to share a brief smile, balancing himself carefully with his arm around her shoulders. His lonesome quietness felt as if it had left him just for now, as he realized his sudden helplessness, quite amused by that thought. Van was not easily the type to be regarded as helpless, surely not. But yet here he was, barely capable to even stand himself straight, truly and indefinitely helpless, as he knew he privately felt inside.

* * *

"You can't be serious, Tomi, you mean you're gonna tell her _everything?_"

Yukari was unsure about this. Then again, Yukari was rather unsure of many things with her ever-present feeble and flimsy backbone comparable only to an elastic band, but yet still, she was highly unsure of this and not to mention being skeptic, doubtful, unconvinced and entirely cynical – whichever way there was to cut it, she was it and more. She, unlike Hitomi and her ancestors, may not have had or currently have any skill with tarot cards or fortune telling and whatever else, though she did know something for certain: an Uchida can always trust their gut, and at the moment being, this Uchida felt like stomaching a good old jar of antacids.

"I know I can't be of much help," Catherine softly input from alongside Hitomi, hushing the words quietly to keep from the elder Kanzaki's ear. "But I'm afraid I agree with Yukari, Hitomi. You know we've been listening to the argument on the other side of that wall, and I'm sure you have your reasons for wanting to tell your mother about… those things… and we'll support you all the way, but are you sure _she _can handle it?"

Hitomi Kanzaki watched their eyes carefully, returning their inquiring gaze with an unsatisfying blank expression. She noticed quickly that they looked like her, the three of them: Yukari, Catherine and San, they truly seemed barely any different than Hitomi did. Each was desperately lacking confidence and was uncomfortably apprehensive, eyes agape and uncertainties on tense alert, wishing for the night to end almost as badly as she. Hitomi felt sorry for the girls really, sorry and apologetic, knowing that not one of them deserved to have to carry Hitomi's burdens way into this late night; it should have been Hitomi's problem and hers alone to deal with, confront with and conquer. But yet, they were so damn devoted to her, trudging along that dismaying path quite voluntarily, that Hitomi knew she could not shake them off, hard as she would try.

"Hitomi?" San looked to her cousin questionably, for she hadn't yet answered them or given them any relief to their collective worries. San was probably the one in the group who understood how problematic everything was to the tiniest extent, unfortunately left aloof most of the time. After all, they talked as if her aunt (whom she'd always considered to be quite the pleasant person) were some sort of lingering ogre ready to erupt in a fit of rage at what Hitomi was going to say, whatever it may be. Sure, sure, maybe her Aunt Hikoro did sound quite unpleasing from what they had heard in their eavesdropping scherades, but San still felt that was little reasoning to see her become so upset with her own kin. Then again, perhaps that was why she, and all of them, was so keen yet extremely anxious as to what Hitomi's declaration would be to give way to such intense reasoning.

"Let me ask you guys something this time," finally, the menacing Hitomi satisfied their beckoning for a response, yet hesitantly, with a voice of sheer gravity and demand. . "Do the three of you believe in me… in what I have to say? Well, _do you_?" She was very quick to ask her statement, just as quick as she was to expect an answer. Hitomi was not fond of hesitance, most especially not at this time.

There was a strange lulling of silence, likely not more than a second's worth, yet still feeling drastically longer. What were these three innocent girls, Hitomi's closest companions, to think of such a hasty and challenging inquiry? First of all, it wasn't like Hitomi was giving them time to even _think. She glared at them imposingly with such an expression that suggested the longer that they would take to reply, the more she would consider them to be disagreeing with that she had so quickly asked, which would essentially mean that Hitomi didn't even have the support of her own friends, her own bridesmaids even, leaving the three in tedious guilt. It was true and plainly evident that there was a joint feeling of unknowingness, wariness, and disillusion between the three towards the strange situation with Hitomi, and with other supernatural things they could not explain and barely even understand, that had climaxed to such important magnitudes, life-changing magnitudes to be more precise. But as conscious as those sentiments were, the responsibility and privilege of being a good friend, a _best _friend, offering unlimited support and unconditional care, trust and respect were much more overwhelming. So naturally, Hitomi had phrased it and placed it so that the three, knowing full well that they would come to choose friendship over doubt (at least she hoped for this to remain so), would leave her with responses of nothing but the affirmative: _

"Yes."

"I do."

"Of course, Tomi."

"Well then," Hitomi turned her back on them, facing forwards in appreciation of their words, despite the fact that she had expected it; it was still most assuring to hear someone speak their faith in her for herself… for once.

"Hey guys, don't you worry about my mother. If you believe, then I'm going to _make _her believe."

* * *

"I think it'll take about four trips," Shied said towards his Gaean companions who now stood alongside him, surveying the mounds of accessories the young boy was motioning towards.

"What's gonna take four trips, hun?" Angela Ferentini was now over to where they were too, having finished gathering all the items that had been within the car, rustling a fatigued hand through a thick set of wavy hair, constantly drifting out of the clips she had pinned it down with that morning. Again that riddled box lay within her arms, tucked protectively alongside her, rather than on the ground amongst the many other belongings.

"The trips to bring all this stuff to the actual base since there's so much of it," Shied replied with a nod. "Approximately four times, with you, me and Merle tugging it all, it shouldn't take more than a few minutes. Fifteen roughly."

"Now wait a minute," Van interjected almost immediately. "Why aren't you accounting for me?"

"Mr. Fanel, don't be silly," Angela replied to his inquiry rather matter-of-factly with a nearly parental stare. "In that condition, we wouldn't permit you to lift a feather, not a feather, Van."

"Oh come on guys, you're exaggerating it," Van forced an enthusiastic smile still in argument, not quick at all to admit that his left leg, after standing on it for so long from three hours of sitting, was beginning to give him some trouble. He cautiously released his grip from Merle to gain an independent balance. "See? I'm quite capable of helping out. Just hand me some stuff here and there and I'll show—"

"Van, must you always be this way?" Merle interrupted plaintively and quite casually, not even staring at him as she slung one of the many gym bags onto her shoulder, grabbing hold of Van's arm before he nearly fell over from his seemingly pathetic show of self-reliance. "You know – _we_ know – that you're barely in any condition to walk, so you can just forget about carrying things for crying out loud! Besides, you heard Shied, didn't you? Fifteen minutes isn't very long. We'll be done in no time, and you can just sit pretty until then."

The indignant Fanelian, quite put out at the thought of simply sitting "pretty", was merely seconds from another quarrelsome debate with Merle about her acting as if his elder; but before even a hint of voice or complaint could escape him, something throbbing and sudden in his left leg _gave way_.

She turned to glare at him with her triumphant stance. She was wary of Van and his situation, quite well aware that he was never one to let on to as much as he knew, or in this case – felt. Much over that, she was well prepped for any argument that he may try to put up; Merle knew Van was blind to his own miseries, and it was her rightful duty to make sure he didn't go about and overexert himself, as he usually did, acting as if Van's missing "common sense". However, as she finally turned to catch her companion in sight, she realized that what she had been meaning to prevent had already come to pass so quickly she hadn't even sensed it, as she, in a strangled form of terror, watched Van's expression instantly turn ghastly pale.

_'What in the hell!' _he thought abruptly, feeling the sensation overwhelmingly unexpected and himself entirely unprepared. Van grimaced quickly and bit his lip to prevent a crying yelp. It was hasty, that fleeting yet surging emergence of pain, erupting as if out of nowhere, as if out of the night skies themselves, hitting him like a sharp bullet to the leg. Van didn't know precisely how to describe it or think of it – not that there was even time to do so – just because though it felt as if it were pain, at the same time, he couldn't quite say he felt hurt, as if in a non-sense way, it was some oddly existing form of _painless _pain. He didn't understand that, and didn't have time to understand it. Beyond the surging impressions, whatever it may have been, Van could barely even hear himself think, or make himself do so. All he managed to notice was his balance ceasing and his vision swiftly impairing, only able to see a complex swishing of nightly colours before him, trees blending in with his friends, moonlight blending with the dirt of the ground, forming a palette of murky and unclear darkness that was as easily disappearing into absolute nothingness. Accompanied with an overpowering sense of light-headedness and an impulse to either gag or pass out, Van last managed to give a fleeting glance to the diamond-studded star sky way overhead, gazing motionless towards his confused figure miles below, a choked breath fighting to escape him, before the ground would rush up coldly and all would turn a dark, pitch black.

* * *

Impact. It was like a colossal wave of water, flooding her, crashing into her at record-surpassing speeds, drowning her, swallowing her into this unknown realm of spontaneously ignited emotion.

She slowed herself to cope with the suddenness.

It was definitely there, that impact – that _force. _It had come to her; it had manifested, literally from nowhere, it was beckoning to her readily, it was _here. _She could not define such a sentiment in words, other than to describe it as indescribable or indefinable. To her, it did absolutely everything while showing nothing; it was… _sensational. _She could feel it well: the fear, the dread, the thrill, the rush, the stamina, the adrenaline, the passion, the grief – _everything. _It was as if every emotion, every dwelling, every thought, had been condensed to one single moment, a sweet instance in time, to overwhelm her to such an extent that she could no longer move, and barely breathe, nor sense herself doing so or will herself to. How very dangerous, she could not move. 

* * * 

Merle had watched in horrified alarm. She had watched as her gut began to wrench with sickened worry, as her heart rate increased at a nearly exponential rate, as she raised trembling and slender fingers to cover her agape mouth, like her eyes, wide with fear and complete dread. She was frozen like this, unmoving, unblinking, and for just a single moment even her frenzied thoughts amounted to absolutely nothing as her mind was overcome with that panic-stricken angst. She could see it all directly in front of her yet Merle's inner self was unbelieving, unwilling to believe, as she knew what she felt inside. It was a feeling that she had thought to be retired in their times of peace and stillness: that embedding and tormenting worry for the sake – for the life happiness and health – of her Van. 

"_VAN!_" Finally realizing her own concern to take action in merely split seconds, the cat-woman lunged forward with an eccentric shout, but even in her able feline speed, wasn't in time to catch her fallen friend as he fell flatly upon the dirt ground with an unnerving thud. Still, she rushed quickly by his side in under seconds, declining to her knees and grabbing hold of his shoulders before a thought could even register in her mind, consuming Van into her arms like a mother encompassing a fallen child. She didn't know what happened to him, why it had happened, or what was to become of him, but Merle's priority lay in simply knowing that he was all right, working to maintain such security. The two others who longed to do the same surrounded her almost instantly. 

"Merle! Merle! What happened? Is he alright, Merle?" the young Shied, much like he was when knowledge failed him with a problem, was abundant with questions, also dropping hold of the packages he had been carrying to rush over to Merle's side. His widened blue eyes squinted desperately in the dark to make out the limp outline of Van's body, lying where it was with a chest deeply heaving. It had happened much too suddenly, so much so that Shied hadn't even gotten the opportunity to sort through his own worry logically, and now that worry accumulated and jumbled far beyond assurance as he caught glimpse of Merle, eyes wide and bright as headlights, gazing at the current situation hopelessly. 

"I don't know!" she replied hastily yet also truthfully, trying to ignore everything around her but what lay before her, isolating Van as the only thing that she could possibly focus on. Her large ears were keen to him, tilted towards him, and slit eyes upon him without movement or blinking or any such thing. She gripped him closely, though he was heavy, keeping his upper half to rest upon her lap as her eyes searched frantically for any indication of a problem, uncomfortably suspicious of his left leg. She did not understand it. It was as if one second he was there… as normally as could be… and the next second, he just fainted so suddenly! There was no reasonable explanation for such behavior, was there? She did not understand it. She did not like not understanding it. She did not like it all. She was frightened. 

His eyes were blank. 

"Van, do you hear me? What's wrong? VAN?" Merle was incessant, and growing rather frantic. It had been too long now. Perhaps only a few seconds had passed them, but even then she could feel the anxiety clumping in her throat, her fingers picking up on a mild tremble as they held him carefully, stroking through the hair as black as their surroundings, but yet soft and wispy like the chilly breeze that engulfed them. There Van lay in her own grasp, as tangible as could be with his weight upon her, hair tickling her chin, soft coat like a gentle suede against her furred skin, and expressionless visage before her eyes, but even then, Merle knew that Van was _not _there; Merle knew it – she could sense it. His eyes were blank, an unfriendly blank, unoccupied and soulless. She was frightened for it was a fear-provoking and challenging image, most definitely disconcerting to say the slightest. She could only feel a perturbed distress to look upon her own best friend, gazing at her glazed as if he saw nothing at all, as if conscious and unconscious and apparently not replying. There was no response from Van. Merle was confident that her voice had echoed loudly, her call to his name, yet there hadn't been a sound, or even a somewhat promising flinch of movement from her companion, asides from his rash breathing which even that seemed otherworldly. Merle hated to think it though she knew that it was evident: despite the fact that he so visually and physically lay before her, it was certainly as if Van Fanel was not even there at all. 

* * * 

There in the middle of the hall Hitomi stood, having been caught in her own motion to be placed in a dead stop, unpredicted and uncalled for. Not a muscle flinched, not a sound was spoken, there was nothing but that sharp halt or brief pause in mid-step, in mid-action, in mid-life. Because of that, it wasn't long before Catherine Corain, having been walking behind Hitomi and too distracted with her own thoughts and concerns to have noticed Hitomi's movements (or lack of them), would come innocently sprawling into her. 

"Umph!" Cathy let out a startled grunt as unknowingly she walked right into the square of Hitomi's back, which acted like a slab of cement stone before her, entirely stopping the smaller Catherine in her tracks. They, the four of them, had been making their way to the dining room, in a sulky-dreary fashion lacking anticipation. Each one, each friend, each bridesmaid, were completely absorbed into their own worries and anxieties on how the rest of the story – that of which they were becoming more engrossed into – would finally come to unfold. With all of their minds being _that_ preoccupied, Cathy couldn't blame Hitomi for acting somewhat hesitant, yet stopping so abruptly out of nowhere did quite heighten her concern. 

"Hito, are you okay?" Catherine piped up quickly and quietly from behind, prodding the inattentive Hitomi lightly with an index finger, while looking on ahead of the both of them to try and catch anything particular that could have possibly gotten her roommate so fixated. Yet there was nothing, Catherine noticed as she stared ahead, nothing much more peculiar than the usual layout of their shared home, the dim lighting from the dining room that they were moments away from entering, and the soft impression of moonlight seen through the large balcony doors of glass. 

Finding herself with not much ideas or a response from her companion, Cathy instead turned her direction to the two figures behind her, with a fleeting hope that she would come to see a more promising picture or hear words of encouragement and the what not. But that hope was equally refused, as she only came to spot what she more so expected: friends Yukari and San exchanging soundless glances just as perplexed and uneasy as hers, as to why Hitomi would stop so unexplainably out of nowhere. Catherine's deep, chocolate eyes glowed with disappointment upon a set, tan skin, and returned themselves to the main person at hand: the conundrum of a girl known as Hitomi Kanzaki. 

* * * 

Stars. Many stars. Glamorous stars. The night sky was _full_ of them, radiantly glimmering and proudly gleaming, each one brighter than the one preceding it, thousands of crystal diamonds upon a navy-black field of silk, with endless threads to all four corners of the vast universe. Upon that supple silk, alongside with the many sparkling gems, lay an extravagant pearl, the watchful moon, hanging passively near the horizon. Collectively, the night sky was an enchantment of its own, brilliant and mysterious with its infinite depth. It wasn't so long ago when he had spent night after night longingly observing at such yonder spectacles on a clear mid-summer afternoon, in the Fanelian courtyards. It wasn't so long ago when he would dream of passing those stars one by one, stream through them as if magically, soaring into that infinite space to somehow, someway, land upon that distant Mystic Moon, a round destiny of blue and green and white that tickled and amused his desire for an adventure so grand. It also wasn't so long ago when he had deemed such a task impossible, when he was seen more as a boy with far-fetched dreams and long-forgotten longings with no way in which to achieve them. But on the contrary, here was Van now, right where he thought he couldn't be, where no one thought him to go, never mind to be in whilst gazing at the stars he had ventured from. Van Fanel, not even yet in his forties in Gaean years, had accomplished the unfeasible! Truly indeed! Perhaps then, it _was _destined after all. 

But then, didn't that make it _that _much more significant? If it was destiny… fate… surely,_ this_ couldn't be the way that such a miracle would come to end. Surely the laws of physics and the boundaries of sheer luck and pure magic could only be defied for very good reason. Surely, destiny had to be better than this. There had to be _purpose – _a purpose. Van was missing out on something, and he knew it. 

Silently and motionlessly, the King of Fanelia grimaced. He was thinking, philosophizing even, and rather deeply at that. But who was to blame the practically crippled man, for Van was one at the moment who was left with nothing but the activities of his own mind. _That was it._ He knew where he was. He was lying in the middle-of-nowhere wilds of Aimsa, exactly where he had fallen, safe in the warming clutch of his best friend, Merle, under the concerned and hovering shadows of Shied and Angela Ferentini. But regardless of Van's sensitivity to his own surroundings through sight, he knew it didn't help him much when four out of the five of his senses were now – and hopefully only 'for now' – useless. _Useless._ Van could not hear, nor could he feel, and he was doubtful on his ability to smell and likely not taste. Therefore it was clever to assume that he could not move, and that he couldn't. In fact, Van wasn't able to do many things, such as responding to the many panic-stricken faces that watched over him, or explaining what on earth it was that had just happened, what could have rendered him to such subjection. But he did have an idea, one he was reluctant to believe, but only because he most wanted to believe it. Just perhaps, all of these sudden difficulties were fate's way, destiny's way, of letting him know that there was no such thing as running away from one's own mind, own inner-being, or even one's own heart, paralyzing him to be left with nothing but the soft glow of enchanting stars and the lingering memories that they invoked. Perhaps that was it after all. There was a message in all this for Van, a simple and clear-cut message that had taken up to these measures for him to come to terms with: maybe it was just about time for wandering-thoughts-Van Fanel to stop denying and to start thinking. There _was_ a purpose that he simply could not ignore for any longer. 

* * * 

He yawned grudgingly and openly with breath smelling of putrid things, feeling himself vacant of any such charm or civility as was once his norm, victim only to a newfound slothful persona accompanied with a dreary sense of fatigue. It was barely past seven in the eve and already he was part drunk and off yawning, a no more than disgraceful image, pathetic in all it was worth. 

Tossing his head back with loose, brown bangs lazily drooping against his face alive with fuzz from a lack of shaving that morning, Amano Nekuchi downed what he hoped would be his last shot of vodka. All such needless alcohol was costing him more than he was willing to pay, and clearly it had little to no effect on his high-spiritedness, or lack of it. He knew well that he was not just wasting time and life and money, but also wasting himself, a man of reputation and dignity, on such stupid things. But regardless on what he did or did not know, Amano felt dead. Dull. Exhausted. At the time being it didn't matter to him how he acted or looked in appearance, or how he consciously polluted his own body, or how he tossed out money like confetti, it was meaningless anyway. Meaningless… wasn't it all? That was Amano's current style of thinking. Everything was meaningless. There was no point to it, and there was no point to him, nor were there any to his actions. The man who had lived and thrived in the high times had finally come to fall to a new low. 

"Would you like another glass, Mr. Nekuchi, sir?" 

A subtle voice awakened him from his numbness, bringing Amano's eyes to tear away from his hands before him to gaze at his musty, colourless surroundings. He hadn't wanted to look at where he was, still privately ashamed to admit being in the place, almost pretending as if he wasn't there at all. Here Amano sat alone in a grimy table of greasy metal, hidden far back in the smoking area of a neglected billiard hall and bar far off somewhere remote in the more deserted areas of commercial Aimsa, quiet and poorly lit, where a thick cloud of cigarette smoke hung like ever-present fog from the shoulders up. The air smelled of strange things, and the surrounding, somber faces looked no happier than they did sober. There were only a few other lonely souls occupying themselves in such a dim leave, lost to an uninteresting match of pool or, like him, doused into the sullen highs of alcohol for all that their wallet could provide. It was pitiful, yes, but there was still some small reassurance that it could have been worse. At least he wasn't aimlessly losing a fortune in some casino, nor were his morals threatened at some sleazy strip club, yet it bothered him to think that he had even considered such terrible things, not that he could claim for having chosen a much better path anyway. This, for Amano, was definitely the bottom of the barrel. 

"Sir? Amano-sempai?" the young cocktail waitress still awaited him, hovering by him pensively. She seemed eager to attend to Amano's order, yet he could barely muster the desire to look at her. It wasn't like he was _that _inconsiderate, for he knew the efforts she was putting forth to keep customers satisfied, even in a place quite unsatisfying. But moreover, Amano knew young Levalin Dowes well. She was none other than the eighteen-year-old younger sister of Marianne Dowes, whom he was rather familiar with from Mikami's Fine Cuisine. Both lavished exquisitely good looks, accompanied with a newborn's complexion, bouncing curls with a colour quite like his hair, and the most vibrant eyes of honey to win a bee's envy. There surely had to be some sort of waitress gene running amuck within their family as well, he thought as he recalled the two. Although he had been good friends with Marianne back in their high school days at Aimsa Shoreline Public High, it was truly Levalin who had taken the fondest liking of Amano – an attraction even. She was a devoted one, seemingly crushing on him far past his own expectation. That was what disturbed him so – had he really come to such an undesirable place to rest his eyes upon such a desirable woman late in her teens, who could only feel the same wanting passion towards him? It was sickening, and he preferred not to think of it. Amano wasn't like that. In truth, he hadn't thought of it twice that she would be working here, despite her good looks or innocent youth. He had wanted something to drink, and that was all. 

"Nah, I'm fine Lev, thanks," Amano Nekuchi waved it off sullenly, still having not raised his eyes, able to hear her hesitation and utter disappointment to have his words, as she apparently tried to come up with something else in which to entertain him with. He didn't understand just what about him kept her so. In all times of times, he figured there hadn't been a time when he didn't look more unattractive than he did now. His clothes were rustled and untidy, likely smelly too from whatever odours they picked up in such a place; his chin littered with tiny hair rubble smooth like pipe-cleaner fuzz, dark hammock bags hung off his eyes, and truly, his expression itself was simply not a happy one, for Amano simply wasn't happy. 

"You need a light, Amano? Y'know there's a lighter by the counter. Plenty of them. My sister says 'hi' too. You don't go to Mikami's as often as you used to." 

The bumbling senior-high school brunette managed a mouthful of words before taking a breath and reaching a pause. It was quite evident that she was pressing for some sort of form of conversation, and she was impending more guilt upon Amano just by doing so. It was true he hadn't greeted her with his usual gung-ho charisma, or went along with the more common salutations and how-do-you-dos, but it was also true that everything at the moment was everything but common. Still, her words brought his attention to certain things: Mikami's, for instance. He really hadn't been there in a while, not since last with Yukari Uchida, when they had previously gotten together to discuss the ongoing details and background information about his… _wedding_, or more so, the wedding-that-once-was-that-might-not-be. But he'd rather not think of that, most especially that of all things to not think of. The man bore enough guilt as it was, and more than enough of his own misery. If he thought more of it, he'd end up losing an equal amount of drinking-money to wash it all away a second time. 

But then if that thought were to be ignored, then of course, there were the cigarettes (it was inescapable, after all, when the only things one can think of are things one would rather not think of). There they lay, a red and white pack of Matinee slims sitting patiently at his grasp, alluring while disturbing, like a seductress in wait. They lay still in their packaging, barely touched by the human hand, enticing him with a silent beckoning and a sweet yet tangy scent. He had been doing well ignoring them (in spite of the fact that he had just purchased the pack) up until now when Levalin's pestering had brought the cigarettes back to his attention. A twinge of emotion and deliberation overcame Amano once again. And then, soon came the memories. 

* * * 

She felt… sad. Simply sad, in all of it's many complexities_. _It was strange – that it may have been – but not unforeseen. As odd as it was to think it in such a way, still, she felt as if that suddenly emerging emotion – sadness – had been within her all along, budding and thriving upon all that she took in, even though she had acted as if without it. Perhaps it was like that strange impact or gust of feeling from earlier had been like the breaking of her water, alerting her to the coming birth of such hidden feelings; a hidden yet ever-present sadness that had impregnated her very being, waiting for it's complete development to reach a final peak before she would experience it all full-force, in her own labor pains. Well, surely the newborn was well on its way and making it known, for the depression had utmost definitely overcome her. Although she had once been caught up with impressions of dread, anger, confusion… such things were parting with her now, leaving her only with that sadness, quickly making her realize all the things she had to be sad about. 

"Hitomi, hey, come on. Cut it out; what's wrong?" A concerned and equally edgy San had quickly stolen the scene. She was beginning to become nervous, and who wouldn't really, when one's own cousin almost completely blanks out, unmoving, unresponsive and pokerfaced, while able to hold as fine of a conversation as the common store mannequin. There was surely something eerie about that, rather eerie and unsettling. But who on earth was San kidding – what about all of this _wasn't _eerie and unsettling, if not worse? At this rate, it wouldn't be long before such oddities could merely be adopted for the norm. 

Of course, like the three expected, there was no response from Hitomi Kanzaki, as she stood there in the hallway shadows with eyes agape and wispy bangs crowning her, erect like a flagpole and nearly as lifeless as one too. She figured this must have been annoying the others: her zoning out every couple of seconds, for she had played with such an effect one too many times over the duration of days. Yet Hitomi could only hope for them to understand, or sense, that this time it was definitely beyond her control. She had had determination earlier, a courageous vigour which had took her the full day to develop, confident in her decision to reveal what there was to reveal, to relieve the load off her back to everyone, before it came close to pulverizing her sanity altogether. Although it was an opportunity, an action, that she wasn't so eager for, still she couldn't help but find disappointment in her current inability to move. Yes, she could not move. She didn't find such strangeness strange – not too much, anyway – for Hitomi's cursed sixth sense had been making its presence well known lately, even to the point of rendering her motionless, and most commonly, at the worst possible times. It only fed to her curiousity what more could possibly be demanded of her now… 

_It could only mean one thing. _

"Hito, you _gotta_ stop doing this," Yukari decided to join in on the impending lecture the three anxious – and tired – friends had decided to begin. It was stark clear that Yukari was exhausted, ready to drop into a deep and lasting sleep, far distant from the perils of this world, at any appropriate cue. Normally, in any gathering, most especially one of girlfriends, she was known to be the flamboyant one, energetic, the infamous Ms. Hyper. But her flashy, good looks had retired to the lackluster weariness everyone else unhappily portrayed. Keeping their voices stern and hushed towards Hitomi, they all could only hope to recharge her quickly enough before Hikoro Kanzaki, just around the corner, could catch wind of the situation. They were like but calculating sheep with only need of fleece, gathering their own courage to skim across the vast bridge hanging above troubled water – nearly raging rapids – only to find, after such a journey, a menacing troll waiting impatiently on the other end. 

_It had to be it. It had to be why she was sad. It had to be… him. _

Catherine was amply relieved to see she wasn't the only one braving the front lines when it came to Hitomi. The other girls had come forward to confront her as well, not achieving any more success than she had initially, yet it was still possible that a group effort could win a more feasible chance for victory, assuming such a thing could be accomplished at all. Apparently with Hitomi, assumptions held little value.

_Tonight was the night. It would either all end, or all begin. She had to make things right… with everyone. Not just her mother, not just her friends, but also her fiancé, her mystical visitors, herself. And in all, she would have to find where it was she stood amongst all those things. _

Sighing, Yukari gave a quick glance to the other girls, finding them all silent in suspenseful wait, with eyebrows narrowed from either concern or aggravation or fatigue, or a combination of all three jumbled together, much like herself. It was apparent that they were all in the means of assembling a phrase, a powerfully dictated phrase or statement of some kind, to awaken Hitomi from this spur-of-the-moment trance or fixation, whatever it happened to be, though each were doubtful as to whether _anyone _could ever release Hitomi from whatever bound her so.

_It was time. He was with her. She would do anything for him. _

But as all turned their attention and direction to the main person at hand, not a word could be uttered, even if there _were _words to utter. Voices were stolen away from all witnesses; thoughts held at a stand still; eyes locked with not a flutter. It was as if the three – Yukari, Catherine and San – had so instantly become even more unmoving and just as engrossed as the puzzling Hitomi was, for all their own reason. For the next seconds passing, there wasn't a motion, or a word spoken, as all eyes remained on Hitomi's ruby pink pendant – a vividly glowing.

_ She could feel him. Van was with her. Despite all, she had chosen._

* * *

**To Be Continued...**

  
This is only the beginning of the chapter! ^^ More of Chapter 16 to come soon ^__^ 


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